Speaker 1: Do you know if in the past, either either while
Speaker 1: you were married or how long have you been married?
Speaker 2: Twenty four years?
Speaker 3: Shut up? Are you serious?
Speaker 4: Yes?
Speaker 3: Oh my god?
Speaker 1: Do you know if your husband and I'm not doing
Speaker 1: this to be dirty, do you know if your husband
Speaker 1: ever No, no, no, bear with me. Do you know
Speaker 1: if your husband ever donated sperm?
Speaker 2: I don't know for certain, but I guess i'd be
Speaker 2: a little surprised we never had that conversation.
Speaker 1: You would be surprised because you don't think he's the
Speaker 1: kind of person that wants to help other people.
Speaker 5: Exactly, not in that way.
Speaker 3: Will you find me?
Speaker 1: Will you find me somebody who is donated sperm or
Speaker 1: and even if it's their even if it's their their
Speaker 1: wife or whatever, that's fine. I need somebody who has
Speaker 1: donated sperm, please, And it doesn't matter how long ago.
Speaker 3: I don't care.
Speaker 1: But I need you too, And for any reason. You
Speaker 1: can tell me you donated sperm for beer money. I
Speaker 1: don't care, but I need somebody who has donated sperm,
Speaker 1: or the spouse of somebody who has donated sperm.
Speaker 6: So you almost frame it like it could be a job.
Speaker 6: The what do you mean when you said donate it
Speaker 6: for money.
Speaker 3: The oh yeah, no, well, I mean you look at.
Speaker 7: It, a nice supplemental income.
Speaker 3: Yeah, sure, don't even need two weeks for it.
Speaker 1: Plenty of that going on, all right, eight six six
Speaker 1: to Elliott eight six six two three five five four
Speaker 1: six eight. Again, I need somebody who at any point
Speaker 1: ever has donated uh their sperm atozoa.
Speaker 3: Please.
Speaker 1: Now, while I'm getting that, just looking forward, Tomorrow's Friday.
Speaker 3: Tomorrow is free beer Friday.
Speaker 1: So anytime you win anything any Friday all summer long,
Speaker 1: leading all the way up to Labor Day, you get
Speaker 1: yourself a case of beer from Lon Oak Farm Brewing Company.
Speaker 1: So again tomorrow, early in the show, right around six twenty,
Speaker 1: we'll give away three eleven tickets.
Speaker 3: You get your three eleven tickets.
Speaker 1: You also get yourself a case of beer from Lon
Speaker 1: Oak Farm Brewing Company.
Speaker 3: Same thing when we get to dirt carseat head rest.
Speaker 1: Anyway, if you need any info on anything, Facebook X, Instagram,
Speaker 1: at em online.
Speaker 6: If we would have played our little game tomorrow, would
Speaker 6: Diane have fun a case of beer?
Speaker 7: Where's my case?
Speaker 3: Yes? You know what, because I'm a good winner, Yeah,
Speaker 3: I would have.
Speaker 1: Yes, I would have asked Melissa, just one little glass
Speaker 1: is fine?
Speaker 3: All right? Where am I going? Line six? Hi Ellie
Speaker 3: in the morning. Hey, what's going on?
Speaker 1: Dude?
Speaker 8: Oh?
Speaker 9: You know donating a little sperm here and there?
Speaker 3: How long ago did you donate? I want to say
Speaker 3: it's been about four years. And were you donating just
Speaker 3: like for beer money or whatever?
Speaker 9: No, No, it was personal reasons.
Speaker 4: I had a vasectomy a bunch of years ago and
Speaker 4: have since remarried and my now wife we were thinking
Speaker 4: about trying to have baby, and really the only way
Speaker 4: to do it, kind of sure fire, was to go
Speaker 4: the IVY route and sorry.
Speaker 9: Not iv what's they called IVF IVS? Thank you?
Speaker 4: Yes, And so that required that I be knocked out
Speaker 4: and they do an extraction and kind of do the
Speaker 4: insemination that way.
Speaker 1: So but wait a minute, So you have you ever
Speaker 1: donated sperm to a sperm bank?
Speaker 9: Oh? No, sorry in that sense, now I have not.
Speaker 1: Oh so was I am I gonna get a bunch
Speaker 1: of people? No, no, no offense.
Speaker 3: I I f'd up. That's on me.
Speaker 1: But like when I said donate sperm a thank you, sir,
Speaker 1: thank you, that's on me.
Speaker 3: That's my You were very helpful.
Speaker 1: Do I need to be more specific, because is that
Speaker 1: donating sperm?
Speaker 3: I don't mean to somebody, Well I do to a stranger, right,
Speaker 3: what is the sperm extraction?
Speaker 1: Like?
Speaker 7: I mean they put them out?
Speaker 3: I heard that part.
Speaker 1: I got an idea, give me a flashlight. You can
Speaker 1: get it that way too. Do you have any other ideas?
Speaker 1: The I'm just reason in.
Speaker 6: Magazines from earlier for sales working towards my degree.
Speaker 1: The no, no, but I need, I need, I guess
Speaker 1: a sperm bank. Where am I going, Kristen, I'm one
Speaker 1: Hi Ellie.
Speaker 3: In the morning.
Speaker 9: Hey, good morning, Elliott.
Speaker 3: Hey who's this this is?
Speaker 4: And?
Speaker 3: Yes, Andy? Have you donated sperm? I'm the opposite. Actually,
Speaker 3: I am the product of a donation.
Speaker 5: My my dad couldn't have kids and my mom hit up.
Speaker 3: A bank, did she really?
Speaker 10: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Have you ever okay, no, you know what? No, no, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: no no. But now, but you know what, do you
Speaker 1: do you ever consider doing it as a kind of
Speaker 1: a way to pay it forward, like with if some
Speaker 1: other guy didn't go in there, you're you don't exist.
Speaker 9: Yeah that's true.
Speaker 6: I mean I have two kids of my own, so
Speaker 6: I feel like I've done my part at this point,
Speaker 6: but I think it's a fair question.
Speaker 1: Here's so, here's here's what I was reading. Right, Well,
Speaker 1: follow follow me on this, follow me on this. So
Speaker 1: there's this guy and he has he has kids. Well,
Speaker 1: he used to donate back up, Elliott, let's go one.
Speaker 3: What dude, We'll call him mister X.
Speaker 1: Right, mister X has hold on one Second's very loud.
Speaker 1: It just got loud where you are. Mister X has
Speaker 1: two kids. He grew up very friendly with mister Y.
Speaker 1: The two of them were friends for a long time.
Speaker 1: So mister Y knows. Like, back when they were younger,
Speaker 1: mister X donated sperm to a sperm bank. Right.
Speaker 3: I don't know for what reason, but he did.
Speaker 1: Fast forward, mister X gets married, He has a couple
Speaker 1: of kids. They are now teenagers, like older teenagers. Mister
Speaker 1: X dies all right, mister why knows that mister X
Speaker 1: never told his kids that he had been a sperm
Speaker 1: donor back in the day. He wants to tell the
Speaker 1: kids that their dad.
Speaker 3: Used to be a sperm donor.
Speaker 7: Why, yeah, siblings, Oh so they can do the twenty
Speaker 7: three memes?
Speaker 1: No, no, no, not not so they can. But if
Speaker 1: somebody else does and comes forward and it's not we're a.
Speaker 3: Match, we're related.
Speaker 1: If you're the kids, the first thing you think is,
Speaker 1: oh my god, mom's bang. Somebody don't do it. Mister
Speaker 1: X didn't want his kids to know.
Speaker 7: But now mister why is going to take it upon
Speaker 7: himself to tell him.
Speaker 1: I don't think he was emphatic, like whatever, on my
Speaker 1: on my deathbed, don't tell them.
Speaker 6: But he just think it's important that they know. I
Speaker 6: didn't even know you were going to say that part.
Speaker 6: If that was his wish, they do, so, then you
Speaker 6: don't do that. But even without that, why would you
Speaker 6: bring this up?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 1: No, because like but that that's what I mean, Like,
Speaker 1: this isn't This is a peculiar scenario. But if you're
Speaker 1: just a regular run of the mill donor and you
Speaker 1: did it when you were younger or even as you
Speaker 1: were older, it doesn't matter. And you have kids, do
Speaker 1: you tell them that you don't?
Speaker 6: It's your choice. It's not your friend's decision whether or
Speaker 6: not to tell GA.
Speaker 3: No, no, no, But just in general, take the friend
Speaker 3: out of it. Again.
Speaker 1: I think it's like, let's say, let's say early early
Speaker 1: in the marriage, you and you're still donating sperm, right,
Speaker 1: you and lindsay you have a couple of kids, they're great,
Speaker 1: everything is fine. Your son's going into high school at
Speaker 1: some point, don't you sit him down and go, hey,
Speaker 1: just so you know, if anybody contacts you through twenty
Speaker 1: three and me, I donated a lot of sperm, you
Speaker 1: could have a bunch of siblings running around.
Speaker 3: Now Have I told my wife?
Speaker 8: Yeah?
Speaker 3: Lizzy didn't care. But this story, did you mention whether
Speaker 3: or not the partner?
Speaker 8: Now?
Speaker 3: Uh? You know what, I don't know. I don't know
Speaker 3: the answer to that.
Speaker 6: I don't know the answer to if you're telling the kids,
Speaker 6: you have got to tell them why or maybe first?
Speaker 3: I agree, Yeah, group dinner, I don't care. Oh my god.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 6: I again, if it's something that's out and open in
Speaker 6: the relationship and I'm the one doing it, you're at
Speaker 6: liberty to share whatever you wish.
Speaker 3: No, but shouldn't you really share that with your kids?
Speaker 3: I'm on the kids should know side. I don't want
Speaker 3: I don't think you have to tell them when they're five.
Speaker 6: I don't want my family, though specifically my children, to
Speaker 6: always every day be like, well, this the day that
Speaker 6: I'm contacted by as sibling, A surprise, brother, or sister.
Speaker 3: Well, it's kind of fun.
Speaker 7: No, it's not. No, I would think it's nerve wracking.
Speaker 3: Why is it nerve wracking?
Speaker 1: Now?
Speaker 3: Another day with that one? Thank God? Another day another
Speaker 3: day waiting for.
Speaker 7: You to think about that every day.
Speaker 3: I don't think you think about it every day.
Speaker 8: For the for the short term. These kids are gonna
Speaker 8: think about that every day.
Speaker 1: Okay, short term, but you think five years from now,
Speaker 1: they're like, maybe today's the.
Speaker 6: Day every time I saw someone who sort of looked
Speaker 6: like me, Yeah, God like approaching me, Hey.
Speaker 1: Did did your did your dad? Are you from your
Speaker 1: dad sperm or my dad sperm? No, that's that's not
Speaker 1: how it's going to be.
Speaker 7: Not answering any phone call.
Speaker 3: Let me ask you this, did Frank ever donate?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 3: You know that?
Speaker 5: No?
Speaker 3: No, no, no, no do you know that? I don't
Speaker 3: thank you? So walk down Rockfille Pike later today and
Speaker 3: take a look.
Speaker 7: See because that could be a sibling.
Speaker 1: Yes, absolutely, I don't know if my dad did or didn't.
Speaker 1: I can have I can have little singles all over
Speaker 1: the place.
Speaker 3: Who was it?
Speaker 1: On?
Speaker 6: Eric on Grock had the AI Image generator do a
Speaker 6: picture of Diane holding a trophy this could be your sister.
Speaker 3: Now this is not a real person. No, it's my girlfriend.
Speaker 3: I have a chat GPT girlfriend. But this could definitely
Speaker 3: be someone who's yead.
Speaker 1: It looks like by the way I look at that,
Speaker 1: and it doesn't look really a lot like Diane. But
Speaker 1: that's the beauty of DNA. I don't know what the
Speaker 1: mom looks like. I know that's your sister.
Speaker 3: How do you even improve you're a robot?
Speaker 6: No, they wanted to this friend wanted to tell them.
Speaker 6: Did you say email or am I just in my
Speaker 6: head thinking it was that.
Speaker 3: I don't know.
Speaker 1: I just thought it was going to be a conversation.
Speaker 1: Maybe it wasn't e mail. I mean, I don't It
Speaker 1: doesn't really matter. I mean, you're committed to text them?
Speaker 3: Do they live nearby? Oh my god, I got it?
Speaker 3: And dig up the story. If you're going to do this,
Speaker 3: I think you should face or drive to somebody. I'm
Speaker 3: not a person lying. That's expensive.
Speaker 7: You can't do it by a text?
Speaker 1: Why not?
Speaker 8: That's how kids communicating? No, fatime, No, it needs to
Speaker 8: be in person. That's that's life changing news.
Speaker 3: See is it or is it not? Life changing?
Speaker 1: It's not if I if Linda calls. If you if
Speaker 1: you just be called Diane, let's have let's have brunch.
Speaker 1: I was listening to the radio their son. I have
Speaker 1: to tell you Frank donated sperm. You don't go, oh
Speaker 1: my god, my life is changed.
Speaker 3: Yeah you do.
Speaker 8: If you If you're going, then I'm going to spend
Speaker 8: every day thinking like, Wow, how many siblings other siblings do?
Speaker 7: I have a lot a lot?
Speaker 3: Frank was big, He had a big kerb feeler. He
Speaker 3: had a lot of sperm.
Speaker 6: Because you may be someone we keep approaching it from
Speaker 6: the perspective of someone contacting this unknowing brother or sister,
Speaker 6: but it may be the person wants to now figure out, well,
Speaker 6: what's this family tree look like? Yeah, yeah, okay, so
Speaker 6: it's his life changing whether you like it or not.
Speaker 1: No, but but it changes nothing about not Diane's life.
Speaker 1: It changes nothing about Diane's lives. If I got that
Speaker 1: knowing that there.
Speaker 3: Could be somebody out there who has Frank.
Speaker 7: Spurner me a weird thing to think of.
Speaker 3: But it doesn't change your life. Your thoughts absolutely absolutely.
Speaker 3: If I was sitting here and got that email, it
Speaker 3: what impacts my thoughts trying to figure out what I'm
Speaker 3: going to have for dinner.
Speaker 6: You could tell if I got that email during the show,
Speaker 6: you would you would wonder what happened to me for
Speaker 6: the next three hours.
Speaker 3: I can't.
Speaker 6: I get an email from sales claiming I mess something
Speaker 6: up and a spot and I didn't. It was good
Speaker 6: to go from the start, but that incorrect email bothered
Speaker 6: me so much. There were a good five to ten
Speaker 6: minutes where I was taken out of it.
Speaker 3: And what did I tell you? What did I tell you?
Speaker 3: You know that person is a chat bot from India,
Speaker 3: but it's my boyfriend.
Speaker 1: The guy's name is Oshkosh but good, no, it's not.
Speaker 3: Yes, it is Oshkush Bragosh, the same thing you would lose.
Speaker 1: That's his name, Oshkosh Ragosh and he's in India.
Speaker 3: I don't know where he is.
Speaker 1: I do ask ask sales. They get stuff from all
Speaker 1: the time, Like I'm a chatbot. It's probably Colin's girlfriend.
Speaker 1: Colin's dating the chatbot.
Speaker 7: Yes, Margaret, No, Tyler.
Speaker 1: Is Tyler's getting all fired up and it tizzy for
Speaker 1: Oshkosh Ragosh.
Speaker 3: And Sue nil. So do we outsource stuff everything? Yeah?
Speaker 1: I don't know, go ask it. The last way we
Speaker 1: fired three hundred people recently. We're getting ready to fire
Speaker 1: a bunch more by the way, quarters coming now.
Speaker 6: Imagine Oshkosh sends me a note to give me the
Speaker 6: heads up that my dad donated sperm.
Speaker 3: Your dad donated sperm. Do not what's with the accent?
Speaker 3: Do not contact, do not, do not reply. They always
Speaker 3: they do not reply, Do not reply.
Speaker 6: Brother, he's not related to me, half brother, you know,
Speaker 6: he's my dad's friend.
Speaker 3: Oh god, whatever, I got your dad sperm. That's a
Speaker 3: life changing email. I got your dad sperm.
Speaker 7: Like curry.
Speaker 1: Okay, okay, boy, Bob, all right?
Speaker 3: Where am I going? Line three? Oh?
Speaker 6: You were going with my stepdad? Yeah, I didn't because
Speaker 6: my dad actually passed all of ours. Have I thought
Speaker 6: you were using it because that was the setup?
Speaker 3: No no, no, no, no no. The story originally has
Speaker 3: a dead dad.
Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, no no. But why would he say hi
Speaker 1: to your stepdad?
Speaker 3: Oh?
Speaker 6: I guess you would say hi to my stepdad would
Speaker 6: be very high. Say hi to my dad. That'd be
Speaker 6: like say hi to Thompson. You know Thompson's dead. I
Speaker 6: had I can't hi Elliott Arding.
Speaker 9: Hey, good morning, it's Martin. How are you Hey?
Speaker 3: What's going on, Martin, how are you doing?
Speaker 9: Grand it so talking about donors and uh, life changing.
Speaker 9: I'll definitely say I am a product of as are
Speaker 9: three of my siblings, and we were all told when
Speaker 9: we were adults it was it's definitely a speed bump.
Speaker 9: That's for damn sure. Excuse me, that was for her sure,
Speaker 9: learning that you know your dad's sterile and you get
Speaker 9: produced by a donor. We're all from different donors. And
Speaker 9: say'm a younger brother. He uh, his donor donated over
Speaker 9: one hundred times over across Bucal States.
Speaker 3: Wow, man, your your brother's got a ton of siblings.
Speaker 9: Oh yeah, yeah, why rest personalities too? We'll go with that.
Speaker 1: Hey, so can I can I ask you this? Can
Speaker 1: I ask you a couple of questions? When you you
Speaker 1: found out when you were an adult? Number one, why
Speaker 1: did you find out?
Speaker 3: Like at what point? Why? Why were they like now
Speaker 3: we have to tell you.
Speaker 9: So two things. The cat got a bag from a relative.
Speaker 9: They spread the family secret to my older siblings. Cousin
Speaker 9: let me know. She goes, hey, I know your family secret.
Speaker 9: I know nothing know because it's so much of a
Speaker 9: family secret is secret of me. So she tells me
Speaker 9: my world was rocked. I'm not gonna lie because yeah,
Speaker 9: there's a feeling that I was deceived by entire life.
Speaker 4: Right.
Speaker 9: And then my parents finally opened up when I left
Speaker 9: to do military things, and I did seek out to
Speaker 9: find who the donor was. Pretty sure I know who
Speaker 9: he is, but he won't own up to it. But
Speaker 9: now my older sister, she found out who hers was
Speaker 9: through connecting to one of the donor's cousins or something.
Speaker 9: He said rocked their world because one you will to
Speaker 9: throw it to make of it. It got even worse
Speaker 9: one he learned that his sample, which was allegedly supposed
Speaker 9: to be all used for one person, was used for
Speaker 9: two other times after her. Wow, so she's built a
Speaker 9: relationship with that donor family, whereas they apparently aren't doing
Speaker 9: anything with the uh, the two others.
Speaker 1: Now, I know this is an unfair question because you
Speaker 1: can't You can't put the toothpaste back in the tube.
Speaker 3: Do you wish?
Speaker 5: No?
Speaker 1: No, I'm being serious. Do you do you wish? Knowing
Speaker 1: knowing like you said, how it wrought your world? You're
Speaker 1: now you know that every one of your siblings is
Speaker 1: from a different parent. Number one, do you wish you
Speaker 1: never learned.
Speaker 3: I can't.
Speaker 9: That's a tough one. I don't, I don't know. I
Speaker 9: mean it explained a lot, given my older brother doesn't
Speaker 9: look like us, and you know he definitely looks like
Speaker 9: Milkman's child. But I mean it brought ol closure to
Speaker 9: those questions. It'sn't really changed much longer regards to relationship
Speaker 9: with parents, because I mean, one, if they didn't, I
Speaker 9: wouldn't be here right.
Speaker 1: No. But the other thing I was going to say
Speaker 1: is you know it, Yes, it could rock your world,
Speaker 1: but if you look at your mom and your dad,
Speaker 1: like your your real mom and dad, the people that
Speaker 1: raised you is your dad, your dad was sterile and
Speaker 1: you couldn't have it, couldn't have a kid.
Speaker 3: So so they got a donor.
Speaker 1: But doesn't And maybe I'm wrong, I feel like you
Speaker 1: would appreciate how badly they wanted a child that your
Speaker 1: mom went out and used a bunch of a bunch
Speaker 1: of gunk.
Speaker 9: Oh No, you're not wrong that it definitely brought a
Speaker 9: more of a uh more pride to it, because I mean,
Speaker 9: it's a life very terms. I was intentional at that rate.
Speaker 1: It wasn't an accent, absolutely absolutely, And there's work and
Speaker 1: effort that went into it.
Speaker 9: Oh, work, effort, financial is behind it. I mean, how
Speaker 9: many kids make kids? And that's definitely wasn't intentional.
Speaker 1: Interesting So now let me now, now, let me flip it,
Speaker 1: and you have not donated sperm in your life?
Speaker 3: Me?
Speaker 1: No, no, knowing what you know, knowing what you know
Speaker 1: about yourself right and your siblings and what what what
Speaker 1: you guys went through? If you if you have, if
Speaker 1: you had been a donor but then had kids, would
Speaker 1: you tell your kids and would you tell them earlier?
Speaker 2: Well?
Speaker 9: I don't. I think they're given given technology now with
Speaker 9: where it's at, yes, I would. I would tell them because,
Speaker 9: like I say, when when, don't when the donations happened.
Speaker 9: We're talking, you know, thirty forty years ago, the DNA
Speaker 9: testing wasn't a thing. It wasn't thought of. Yeah, it
Speaker 9: was a supposed to be, not the script whereas not.
Speaker 3: Oh damn it, you cut out, you will not out? Yeah, no,
Speaker 3: I hear you.
Speaker 1: Hey, listen, thank you, you keep cutting out, but that's okay. Hey,
Speaker 1: thank you sir, thank you, my friend. Isn't there a
Speaker 1: mindset that you would tell them from day one?
Speaker 3: But they may not be born yet Yeah.
Speaker 1: What I mean no that when your kids are born
Speaker 1: you would tell them from day one you're the product
Speaker 1: of of of donor sperm.
Speaker 3: Oh this is not going back to the original storm.
Speaker 1: Yeah no, no, no, I'm just saying, like if my if
Speaker 1: my kids if no, not, not that they were donor sperm,
Speaker 1: my kids.
Speaker 3: Jackie and I have our kids the.
Speaker 1: Normal, the right, not well you know what I mean, No,
Speaker 1: the common way, the common way, the Indian voice.
Speaker 3: I had to get them off my back. The no. No,
Speaker 3: but Jackie and I are that.
Speaker 1: But if I had been a sperm donor, wouldn't you
Speaker 1: raise your kids just going hey, I was a sperm donor.
Speaker 1: In case anybody calls you, I was a sperm donor.
Speaker 1: So that way they grow up. It's like being adopted,
Speaker 1: Like you want your kids to grow up knowing they.
Speaker 3: Were adopted, so you you.
Speaker 1: They grow up knowing that you donated a bunch of sperm.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's not exactly the same, but it's apples
Speaker 1: and sperm.
Speaker 6: Yes, Well one Dirk thinks that that Hurdler might be
Speaker 6: Diane's brother.
Speaker 3: It's it's great number two.
Speaker 6: But then from Instagram, here's a scenario. What if mister
Speaker 6: why eyes and then the secret dies with him. And
Speaker 6: then a couple of years later, someone reaches out to
Speaker 6: mister X's kids and say, hey, we're siblings. The kids
Speaker 6: might think their dad cheated on their mom. I think, mister,
Speaker 6: why should I either tell the kids or write it
Speaker 6: down in an envelope and make sure the story gets
Speaker 6: to them after he dies, so that if anything in
Speaker 6: the future pops up, it isn't confusing.
Speaker 3: Well, how far down the what if road do we
Speaker 3: want to go? Yea at some point?
Speaker 1: Because what if he dies in a house fire where
Speaker 1: it was written down and that burns up? Also, God,
Speaker 1: I did not imagine that, So that's a no. Yeah,
Speaker 1: But I mean at some point it's it's I just
Speaker 1: think he must hold somebody.
Speaker 3: Yeah, no, it is it is that you make your
Speaker 3: head may go there.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, oh absolutely, especially if you're now an adult
Speaker 1: and you never knew, and it would be like, hey,
Speaker 1: we're we're your.
Speaker 3: Siblings, you know.
Speaker 1: And by the way, if the siblings don't know that
Speaker 1: their mom needed donor sperm, you would You'd have no idea.
Speaker 1: You just go, hey, I just got on twenty three
Speaker 1: and me my parents are dead, and I got really
Speaker 1: interested in my family.
Speaker 3: We're siblings.
Speaker 1: Yes, you would think that you're that your old man
Speaker 1: cheated on your on your mom.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I just still don't think it's that friend's.
Speaker 3: Place to tell.
Speaker 1: But if not, then but then the secret, well it's
Speaker 1: not even a sequell.
Speaker 3: It is a secret. The secret's dead. And then you
Speaker 3: never know.
Speaker 1: And like like Martin was saying, listen, they found all
Speaker 1: their donors.
Speaker 3: It's very easy.
Speaker 1: Well, I guess now it's very easy to do. Hi,
Speaker 1: Ellie of the morning, Yeah, Hi, who's this?
Speaker 4: Hi?
Speaker 5: This is Tiffany. I was calling in regards to your
Speaker 5: being shocked of how many kids are out there in
Speaker 5: the world. My husband and I did IVY and we
Speaker 5: only needed to use one round of eggs. We got
Speaker 5: naturally pregnant second time and had eleven five day embryos
Speaker 5: left over, and we decided to in it out in
Speaker 5: the world. So we have no idea if we have
Speaker 5: other children that are exactly my and my husband's burn.
Speaker 3: Wow, Like that's legit.
Speaker 7: And do you think about that every day?
Speaker 5: No?
Speaker 3: I don't.
Speaker 10: I just know just when I turn on the goddamn radio,
Speaker 10: it's you know, like it was so hard to get
Speaker 10: pregnant for us, it was such a journey, and then
Speaker 10: when we finally had it, we said, you know what,
Speaker 10: other people want this.
Speaker 5: Just as much as we do.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Sure, God blessed. I mean that's a very that's a
Speaker 1: very selfless thing to do. Good for you now.
Speaker 5: But our kids are younger, three and five, so we
Speaker 5: do plan to talk to them about it, but we
Speaker 5: don't know how to, you know, and say, look, there
Speaker 5: could be eleven other kids out there, we could have
Speaker 5: thirteen kids.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but you would explain they're not your kids. I
Speaker 3: mean they are, I mean exactly, the actually could be
Speaker 3: our children, right.
Speaker 5: They're biologically ours, but they're not our kids.
Speaker 6: Do you have any sense of the process that would
Speaker 6: have then come next with those donated embryos?
Speaker 5: Wait can you say it again?
Speaker 6: Like what after you gave them the go ahead to
Speaker 6: spread them out? You said, the world? But how far
Speaker 6: would that network have taken those embryos?
Speaker 3: Oh my gosh.
Speaker 5: Okay, so during the time we didn't know. But then
Speaker 5: we did it through Shady Grove and they only had
Speaker 5: nine facilities and they're all on the East coast.
Speaker 6: Oh okay, but like at least it's not in or
Speaker 6: she sounds so disappointed that they may be so close.
Speaker 5: Oh that's I was kind of scared that they are close,
Speaker 5: because I'm like, hey, if you fall in love with
Speaker 5: someone that looks a little bit lucky, let me know.
Speaker 1: Okay, right, No, No, but I thought you were going
Speaker 1: to say, like like like if if the eggs went
Speaker 1: to Japan, I bet I could pick them out.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I want to care, but the blonde over there.
Speaker 3: Yeah, no, I get that.
Speaker 1: I get that, but you but but you do plan
Speaker 1: on telling your your kids?
Speaker 5: Absolutely? Yeah, I feel like we.
Speaker 3: Have we have to. What a wonderful.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean just for awareness and potentially them reaching
Speaker 5: out and us having a relationship that could happen.
Speaker 3: Did you think of that? Oh wait, whoa whoa, whoa
Speaker 3: whoa whoa, whoa whoa.
Speaker 1: We don't want that, elliot, thank you no, because then
Speaker 1: they want money.
Speaker 7: We did not want that.
Speaker 5: We want them to be happy. I hope I never
Speaker 5: hear from any of them like that means they're happy
Speaker 5: and healthy and they're living their best life.
Speaker 9: That's what we want.
Speaker 1: But you're right, twenty three and me or whatever, they
Speaker 1: could reach out next thing, you know, your kids are
Speaker 1: finding out they have siblings like absolutely, Yeah, Hey, when
Speaker 1: it's when it's time to tell them, can we do
Speaker 1: it on the radio?
Speaker 5: Oh my god?
Speaker 3: Yeah, I love that? Not the response, Yeah that's what
Speaker 3: we were doing wrong. Hey, can I can I ask?
Speaker 3: Can I ask an educational question? Like for for myself?
Speaker 1: So, like you said, you have you have all these
Speaker 1: these embryos, right, and you have kids and it's great,
Speaker 1: and you decided you were going to help other couples
Speaker 1: because you understand what's in and I do.
Speaker 3: I think that's very that's very awesome. What is what
Speaker 3: is the other option?
Speaker 1: Like if you if you're like, we're good, we don't
Speaker 1: need them, Like, what what happens?
Speaker 3: What happens to them?
Speaker 5: Do you have three options? You can donate them, you
Speaker 5: can give them to science, or you can trash them.
Speaker 3: Oh really?
Speaker 7: Yeh yep?
Speaker 3: And was it?
Speaker 5: And I would hope that most people donate them to
Speaker 5: other families And it's not then obviously, then let's go
Speaker 5: to science. I'm to go through the process and to
Speaker 5: trash them. I doubt that's very minimal unless you are
Speaker 5: a selfish, selfish pig.
Speaker 3: Right, excuse me? How much time do you have to
Speaker 3: make that decision?
Speaker 5: We you can keep I believe and maybe incorrect with this,
Speaker 5: but I believe that we had five years once they
Speaker 5: were frozen. Y Yeah, And so we had our first born,
Speaker 5: and then when he was ten months old, we were
Speaker 5: pregnant with our second, and so we had eleven embryos
Speaker 5: frozen purl it. We let her get to a year
Speaker 5: old and then said we don't want any more kids,
Speaker 5: please donate them to other families. And we had to
Speaker 5: go through like a psychiatric evaluation. You have to go
Speaker 5: through many inner reviews to make sure that it's not
Speaker 5: me pressuring my husband or my husband pressuring me.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I would trig.
Speaker 2: Mm hmmm.
Speaker 5: It was a big deal. I mean, I don't. My
Speaker 5: mom's not happy about it. She's like airrified, like you said,
Speaker 5: Elliott coming back for money and I and that's that
Speaker 5: is a possibility.
Speaker 2: You never know.
Speaker 3: All right, Very good, very good, You've been great. Thank
Speaker 3: you man. Family. Oh like your own family and.
Speaker 6: How they feel about it, and how those opinions don't
Speaker 6: necessarily line up with yours.
Speaker 3: Oh so like like Phyllis is mad that I donated sperm.
Speaker 6: So meanwhile the therapist is saying that that couple is crazy.
Speaker 6: Considerate and her mother is like, no, you're just crazy.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I guess I didn't think of that either.
Speaker 8: Wow.
Speaker 3: Great story, though, Where am I going line too?
Speaker 2: Hi?
Speaker 3: Elliott the morning unless your mom?
Speaker 7: Hey is this me?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 8: Hi?
Speaker 3: Who's this?
Speaker 2: Hey? This is Sarah from Richmond, Virginia.
Speaker 1: I feel like we've approached this thing from every angle.
Speaker 3: The only thing I know is that you didn't donate sperm.
Speaker 2: That's correct. That is absolutely correct. So you guys were
Speaker 2: talking about like when to tell your kids. So I'm
Speaker 2: donor conceived, and I know our personal family story. My
Speaker 2: parents they had a lot of shame associated to having
Speaker 2: to use the donor, but they also yes, so this
Speaker 2: is in the early eighties and they, like, I guess
Speaker 2: fertility wasn't as widely accepted.
Speaker 3: That's probably true.
Speaker 2: It was kind of a tabby subject, so it was
Speaker 2: something that they never wanted to share. But they also
Speaker 2: were told by the clinic that they used that they
Speaker 2: should not tell the children that were can in this manner.
Speaker 2: And another part of it was they did. They called
Speaker 2: it washing the sperm. So my dad's sample was combined
Speaker 2: with somebody else's sample to help try to make his
Speaker 2: more viable. So they told my parents that there is
Speaker 2: a potential that it could be his biological children. It
Speaker 2: wasn't the case in our family, but in like the
Speaker 2: community that I've been involved in since finding out that
Speaker 2: has happened. So it's not like cut and dry, especially
Speaker 2: in the eighties when they weren't able to do like
Speaker 2: that man a test to determine it. So it wasn't
Speaker 2: as like it's not necessarily that they were intentionally keeping
Speaker 2: a secret. It was that they truly didn't know because
Speaker 2: of the way that it was approached.
Speaker 1: Now, yeah, no, totally totally. Now do you know anything
Speaker 1: about the donors?
Speaker 2: Uh? So, I did a lot of detective work. I
Speaker 2: know who the donor is. He does not want to
Speaker 2: have contact with any of my half siblings, and myself
Speaker 2: does also he does.
Speaker 3: He has got tons of them.
Speaker 2: Yeah, oh yeah, I have more than just his nuclear family.
Speaker 2: I have a brother that I grew up with and
Speaker 2: three other half siblings that I don't like that aren't
Speaker 2: the donor said, so I have seven altogether.
Speaker 1: Wow? Now, and so he doesn't want to be contacted,
Speaker 1: does it say anything?
Speaker 3: Can you contact his kids and break the news to them?
Speaker 7: I have?
Speaker 2: Yeah, and one of them.
Speaker 3: I was kidding. Oh my god, Oh my god.
Speaker 2: I'm linked with me on one of the genetic sites
Speaker 2: that it was either ancestry or twenty three in me.
Speaker 2: But one of the things that they are trying to
Speaker 2: change legislation for the verbiage of donor conceived or anonymous donor,
Speaker 2: it's they're going to change it to unidentified donor because
Speaker 2: you can't guarantee anonymity anymore with this because of all
Speaker 2: these genetic tests that are available or the DNA test.
Speaker 1: Pause pause pause When you connected with this the daughter
Speaker 1: of the donor, did she know that her dad had
Speaker 1: had donated?
Speaker 8: No?
Speaker 2: And it gets even weirder, So was it their mom
Speaker 2: was a nurse at the fertility clinic that I was
Speaker 2: conceived that.
Speaker 1: Oh wait, is this one of those like there's so
Speaker 1: many pieces, but like, was this where the doctor was
Speaker 1: impregnating your mom?
Speaker 2: Don't think so? But don't know?
Speaker 3: Oh God, stop asking.
Speaker 2: Questions, right, That's that's where I am with it. I'm like, Okay,
Speaker 2: you can't give me my medical history. I don't want
Speaker 2: to know anything else about it because this sounds dirty.
Speaker 1: WHOA Well, back then, I get maybe they weren't taking
Speaker 1: it far.
Speaker 3: Well, No, they weren't really just enter the room.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, Oh my god, you're a yes to everything.
Speaker 3: Yeah, well, what do you want to do? If you
Speaker 3: ask it, it'll come true. Have you dated a sibling?
Speaker 2: No, so thankfully I so I was conceived that a
Speaker 2: U penns clinic and I live in Richmond. Now my well, okay,
Speaker 2: So another layer to this. One of my half siblings
Speaker 2: has a autosomal dominant genetic treat that a disease that
Speaker 2: is genetic, right, it's from the donor. So that was
Speaker 2: our main focus was letting all of the half siblings
Speaker 2: know that you have a fifty to fifty chance of
Speaker 2: having this genetic condition because it came from the donor
Speaker 2: and they're kind of doing the head misand from the
Speaker 2: donor's family, like we don't want to talk.
Speaker 7: About it or know about it.
Speaker 2: But like I had to get genetic testing. I had
Speaker 2: to have my kids screen for it because it's a
Speaker 2: pretty SERI it's conditioned.
Speaker 8: Uh.
Speaker 2: Fortunately I don't have it. But unfortunately one of my
Speaker 2: half siblings that's donor conceived, not from the nuclear family.
Speaker 5: She has it.
Speaker 2: So it's it. I think it's making light. It is
Speaker 2: like a crazy funny weird situation, but for everybody that's
Speaker 2: donor conceived, it's pretty serious to not know your medical history.
Speaker 2: And the screen back then they didn't know what you
Speaker 2: were doing. Like I'm pretty sure the screen was just like, hey,
Speaker 2: is this humans firm? Let's put a dinner, right.
Speaker 3: Yeah, No, I get that. I get that. Wow, man,
Speaker 3: you are something. Hey does your and like but your
Speaker 3: husband knows all this, right?
Speaker 8: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Yeah, so my husband knows, my children know. I've met
Speaker 2: up with your half siblings, the the one that I'm
Speaker 2: closest with anyway, and then I'm in communication with some
Speaker 2: of the other half siblings.
Speaker 3: Fascinating, fascinating, great, the.
Speaker 2: Growing growing community. And I to reference back to the
Speaker 2: other female caller that donated her her IDs trials or
Speaker 2: I don't know the yeah, right. So that was another
Speaker 2: thing that I talked with my girlfriends. You know, I
Speaker 2: have a few girlfriends that have been through IBS, and
Speaker 2: I was like, hey, like, if you do donate, just
Speaker 2: know that, like the potential exists that somebody could come
Speaker 2: back to you. So you just have to be aware
Speaker 2: of that because I I like, I don't need a
Speaker 2: relationship with the donor. I just want my medical history
Speaker 2: but I know there are some people that are, you know,
Speaker 2: sure looking for more than that.
Speaker 1: Listen, you got to be more like me. I know
Speaker 1: none of my medical history. Don't care.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think. I think it's different when you start
Speaker 2: having kids. Like if it ended with me, I'd be fine.
Speaker 2: But if I'm signing kids up for conditions that I
Speaker 2: wasn't even aware of, I would.
Speaker 3: I feel I got two kids, didn't bother me. Still,
Speaker 3: all right, very good, You're great. I love you. Hey,
Speaker 3: hold on one second, let me get you a shirt
Speaker 3: for you. I give you one. Yeah, I don't even know.
Speaker 1: That's okay, hold on one second, Hold on one second.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, what a story, isn't that craziness?
Speaker 3: Saga continues. Yes, I'll be honest.
Speaker 6: When she said sperm washing, I got distracted because I
Speaker 6: was thinking of that car Gabe rented.
Speaker 3: You know how you know where? Yes?
Speaker 1: No.
Speaker 3: When she said sperm washing, do you know how they
Speaker 3: wash it? They spin on that thing? Yes?
Speaker 7: Yes?
Speaker 3: And when she said it, I couldn't get it in.
Speaker 1: I was like, I lost it, But then it came
Speaker 1: back to him right freaking on