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Speaker 1: So crazy, guys, I think is piling on right now unnecessarily.

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Speaker 2: So are they still together?

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Speaker 1: Do we know?

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Speaker 3: Yeah? Yeah, she moved into his home with her daughter.

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Speaker 1: Oh good, I wonder if you live there?

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Speaker 4: Final Hi, Hello, welcome to another brand smaging new episode.

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Speaker 1: Oh bad TV.

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Speaker 5: I'm Dale.

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Speaker 1: That's bad.

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Speaker 2: Great to be here.

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Speaker 1: Hi, til Hi Pat, did you watch the soccer game

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with your fiance?

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Speaker 3: No, Dylan, we were both at work, but we watched separately.

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I'm sorry for your loss.

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Speaker 1: That's okay, rubbish game of football, that's how they say.

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But listen, who cares about any of that stuff?

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Speaker 5: Right?

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Speaker 1: I mean I certainly don't care. I mean it's the

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end of the season where it's seventeenth place. It doesn't matter.

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Just you forget about it, right, The.

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Speaker 2: Valley's more important?

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Speaker 1: Well, I would say that it's not, because.

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Speaker 3: You know it is infinitely Actually, Pat, I would agree

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with you there two to one. Dill sorry to say.

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Speaker 2: Well, that's how democracy works.

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Speaker 1: Hit him with the announcements.

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Speaker 2: Oh, Ruby and I are gonna be helming the shows.

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I mean, little baby Lucy could be arriving at any minute,

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so we never know. So I'm just letting you know.

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You could tune into an episode, and Dylan's not gonna

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be here. It's just gonna be Ruby and I. But

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you're gonna love it.

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Speaker 1: It's gonna be amazing.

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Speaker 2: Oh, it's gonna be a good time.

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Speaker 1: It's gonna be amazing.

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Speaker 2: It's gonna be different. Dylan and I play off each other.

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We've been doing this together for eight years. Ruby is

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a great podcaster in her own right. Yeah, and we'll

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enjoy breaking down the game film of Below Deck and

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the Valley and maybe Summer House, and then Dylan will,

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I guess if he has time, chime in to give

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us the uh, the the lowdown on how it is

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being a father.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, we'll do a Patreon episode in somewhere

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in there. But yes, Baby Lucy is coming soon, so listen,

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we have lots of stuff to get into Iteen's five

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Stars words. You know.

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Speaker 2: I remember actually having a thought two weeks out which

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Dylan technically is, or a week and a half out

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from meeting Baby Lewis Lucy, when Elliott was on the way.

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I was thinking, in this very room by myself, I

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hope I like this thing.

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Speaker 1: I said that to myself, this thing being your human daughter.

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Speaker 5: That's right, got it? And you don't?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, yeah.

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Speaker 1: So listen, the Valley is crazy. You know a lot

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of people have been commenting that, you know, the viewership

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is down and people are pissed right that the the

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people on the show are so disgusting that there's nobody

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to root for.

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Speaker 5: Really, and I.

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Speaker 1: Don't know what to tell you. Out side of the

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three of us are kindred spirits. We're not having a

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great time.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't know what you're talking about.

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Speaker 1: It's like it's really kinderible.

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Speaker 2: By the way, on a Bravo network, you show me

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an ensemble cast show of reality TV where there are

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likable characters, particularly the Real Housewives franchise. Everyone's just lovable

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on there.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, yeah, give me a break.

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Speaker 2: Alec Baskin came out this week, that's the executive producer

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and creator of The Valley, and he said, don't you worry,

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We're not making any changes. I appreciate him sticking to

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his gun.

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Speaker 1: Good for him. What was that thing y'all were talking

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about this tay on the text with the article and.

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Speaker 3: Being bad, oh, because they somebody from people on magazine

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wasted their time doing a piece on the men of

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Bravo and what they think on Love and I think

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that those editors should lose their jobs.

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Speaker 5: Oh oh oh got it? Got it? Okay, yeah, that.

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Speaker 3: Is not really. Don't don't. That's not what I mean.

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That was a joke and a bad joke. Don't fire people.

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But also what I will say is that I think

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that every one of these people is the Lisa Barlow

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like of another show. But it's just all they're all

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kind of unhinged, you know what I mean. So it's great.

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Speaker 1: Was Lisa Barlow really unhinged? I don't recall Lisa. I mean,

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they're all unhinged.

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Speaker 2: But listen, well she was going to call her secret service,

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the FBI, the CIA.

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Speaker 1: No, I got I got confused, And I thought you

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were talking about Lisa Rinna, the one with the things

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and the and then the.

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Speaker 2: Mom who has a who it's a bird, yeah, Lois, Lois, yeah.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, And that's so crazy. Not a lot of people

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can say that my mom is a bird, or.

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Speaker 2: That I think my mom shit on my windshield.

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Speaker 1: This morning, right right right, Your mom is either a

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person or dead.

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Speaker 3: No, but Lois is a bird?

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Speaker 1: Right, all right, Let's get into the episode What Our Bumps.

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Speaker 2: Well, I'm sorry, I'm gonna get of my burning hail jacks.

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Speaker 1: Sis.

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Speaker 5: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: See, it's so cumbersome to the tongue that you didn't

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even pluralize.

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Speaker 2: You're right, I didn't. And what is the direct quote?

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Speaker 1: I said it? Right right, I'm.

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Speaker 2: Going to get my rotten hells.

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Speaker 5: Okay?

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Speaker 2: Is it okay? If I go first? Yeah, I go first, Okay,

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Ruby And I texted earlier Roberre you okay if he

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goes first, I.

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Speaker 6: Am Bill, Thank you for great Danny and Nia, I

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think they believed that they were going to just come

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on this reality show hammer check, talk about wanting more

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fucking crumb crunchers and moving to Santa Clarita, and that

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would be the storyline.

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Speaker 1: Now you are going to pay with a pound of flesh,

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Nia and Danny.

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Speaker 2: That's because your quote unquote friends will find a weakness,

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they will expose that weakness, and they will make a

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mocker review on national television. And that's exactly what took

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place here. And I've learned the art of this watching Jasmine.

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What you do is you keep it simple, You stick

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to one accusation, and you just hammer it over and over.

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Oh sure, yeah, yeah, he touched my thigh inappropriately, and

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then he smacked my wife or soon to be wife

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on the ass and said, go get me a drink.

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Go get daddy a drink.

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Speaker 1: She said it.

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Speaker 2: By the way, if you drank every time, she said

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that in this last episode, you'd be fucking wasted.

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Speaker 1: Well, speaking of the Bengo card, I think that I can't.

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I thought these people were my friends. Is a fun

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one for the reality TV Bengo card, and we had

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that tonight.

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Speaker 2: Oh. I also appreciated the entire cast agreeing that there'd

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be no more backstabbing and if they had a problem

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with the person, they tell.

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Speaker 1: Him to their face.

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Speaker 5: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Sure, will last about as long as a p diddy

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sphincter in a riker's eyelid, you know, uh huh and

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rip his ass apart.

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Speaker 5: Oh yeah, definitely.

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Speaker 2: The last part of note, Sheena Shay and Michelle took

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that lovely walk on Runyon Canyon. I've done that many times.

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Sheena sha giving marriage advice to remind the audience her

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first husband was a bloated drug addict through the entirety

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of their relationship, and then the next husband is a

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bloated pig who doesn't speak to two of his children

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that are living on two separate in two separate countries.

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So for two, two different lands, oh for two?

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Speaker 5: And how many rotten hells would you give the episode?

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Speaker 2: I'm going to give it. I still liked it. I'm

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going to give it forty two rotten hells.

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Speaker 5: Ruby, go ahead, all right.

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Speaker 3: I agree with everything Pat said. We are having a

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great time here. Or maybe it was you, I can't remember.

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I'm high. I think that people who think the show

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is too dark go watch something else or get a

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new network, but don't go to TLC. This episode, particularly,

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I mean the angry little Elf. It wasn't a good

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showing for him. I think Nia is arriving at Reality

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Tea East. She's waken up to what this is, which

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was really fun to watch. And I actually think a

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lot of people showed up for work this week. I

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think Brittany did a good job. I think Luke was

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like kind of like ooh ooh, a little trying to

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get in there, failing, but very fun. Yeahah, fifty four bumps.

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Speaker 5: And what are you drinking? It's called a long drink.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, long ring. It's just one of those another one

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of those hard Seltzer cocktails.

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Speaker 5: It's called long drink.

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Speaker 3: Yeah did it? Have you guys ever had a peach

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pear Lacroix?

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Speaker 2: Oh?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, peach pear. I don't know if I've sampled that flav.

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Speaker 2: Oh I love Lacroix.

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Speaker 1: I kind of stick with the classics, right, I go

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lemon or clear and that's pretty much. You know, people

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get very very FORCCTA with their waterloose and this is

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one is vanilla orange and it's like what also called

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the cream skull.

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Speaker 5: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: So I'm going to give this episode zero zero rottenhails.

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Wowse I'm going to give it zero umps for one.

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Speaker 5: Very simple reason.

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Speaker 2: Jax isn't here.

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Speaker 5: No she and a Shee is zero bumps.

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Speaker 2: It takes down the show.

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Speaker 1: I mean I literally I could not you know, you

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know what the soldiers on the beaches of Normandy experienced

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that kind of ringing where you kind of lose grip

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of reality because of the trauma.

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Speaker 2: Did the guy next to me just have his arms

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fly off?

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Speaker 1: Oh?

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Speaker 2: He did, Jesus Christ.

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Speaker 1: That's what I went through when I saw Sheeniche walking

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on Runyan Canyon. It was a lot for me. So

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I'm going to give it zero rotten hells. All right,

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let's kick things off. I believe with Zach, who I

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just hate so much. I know that, Yeah, it's a

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very foreign thing to me. I know that he's a

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gay man. But being in that room with all those women,

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and being not just in the room with all those women,

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fighting with all those women about what all those women

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are fighting about, but kind of being the catalyst for

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the conflict and the backstabbing. He's a pathetic human being.

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Speaker 2: Who was Someone went on a podcast and explained Zach's trajectory,

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how he'd always planned to be on reality TV?

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Speaker 1: Oh did he?

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Speaker 2: Yes?

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Speaker 1: And we should say whatever, why I speak about an

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actual human being so disparagingly, It should always be framed

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as their current state, right, People change, people grow. It's

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so Zach could become not pathetic.

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Speaker 3: But who he could, and I could join the WNBA.

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So keep your hopes up.

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Speaker 5: I think it's different.

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Speaker 1: Anyone can dream.

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Speaker 2: Well, we begin the episode with the entire cast, or

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almost the entire cast, given me the full court press.

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They really wanted to admit that her husband is a

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goddamn drunk?

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Speaker 5: Is fair enough?

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Speaker 2: Now, Jeff, can.

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Speaker 3: I ask you to you guys are married there is.

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They're basically saying, we're mad at you because you are

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not saying my husband is a blackout drunk right now?

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Are you allowed to say that about your husband and

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your wife? Are you supposed to?

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Speaker 1: Okay, I think we'll break the whole thing down. But

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Nia is protective of him and slightly delusional about it

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because it's quite a painful thing to stare in the face.

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Speaker 2: Well, he's a breadwinner there too, you know, living in

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that really nice condo. Well, Jasmine is upset, and I

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think this will answer Ruby's question because Britney has allowed

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her life and her verbally abusive, coke addicted husband to

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be exposed for all of us to see. And then

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we got dark side Danny, that little guy. Yeah, and

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he's a fucking drunk. And it's the least Nia can

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do for the show to say it out loud.

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Speaker 1: I want to defend Nea a little bit when we

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contrast her, you know, her openness to Britney's. One could

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say that, yeah, Britney clearly wins, but that's a little

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bit like if you have a mole on your ribcage

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or a Fred Savage kind of mole on your lip. Okay,

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what choice does Britney have but to be open. She's

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a dick. She's married to a coke addict who is

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running around leaving little bread crumbs around and screaming on camera.

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He loves the cameras, so it's a completely different thing.

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Speaker 2: It is, but you showed up on a reality show.

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So the deal is. And we've gave Kyle on Real

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Housewives and Belly Hills a lot of shit for this.

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You're on reality TV show us your life.

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Speaker 1: She needs to get with the programmed, sister, She says,

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why are my friends talking about me behind my back?

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Speaker 5: Nia?

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Speaker 1: They're not good friends, they are These are a moral

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fixtures in your life and are actually, i would say,

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closer to your enemies than your friend's right now, So

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Daniel walks in.

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Speaker 2: Well, a little guy woke up from the dead to

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find his wife being pressed to make sure that he's

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a little drunk, and that is in fact a storyline.

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This is interesting because these two were so protected their

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first season. They were just like this lovely couple and

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now season two, the chickens have come home to roosts

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and it's time to dismember their marriage.

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Speaker 1: Well, we had a little Danny drinking in the first season.

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Speaker 2: I called it out first. I said, this little guys

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a drunk, didn't I go ahead.

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Speaker 3: You did. And I also think that it's worth noting

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maybe it was very late in the season that we

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got the Outlander drunk him leaving dinner. So I think

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perhaps people thought or they saw us getting annoyed with

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them and we want to see their cracks, and now

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we are seeing their crevasses, and I think it's pretty bad.

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I also think that and Mia, like, I don't think

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that she can really do anything else other than be like, yeah,

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he was drunk, and then she diffuses everyone's ammo and

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it's kind of like yell at me. Now I kind

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of agree.

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Speaker 5: She is so beautiful, Oh my god.

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Speaker 1: I mean my wife is sexually attracted. I'm not talking

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about like, ohs and days beautiful. I'm talking about, like,

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I think my wife would leave me for me. Yeah,

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00:14:24,720 --> 00:14:27,279
very pretty. I mean, it's nuts. So Danny walks in.

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He obviously has no clue what's going on. He's very confused,

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and that's because he has just woken up from a blackout.

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Speaker 2: It confused.

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Speaker 3: You you have you have small children, and this is

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the type of thing that people wake up from when

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they are aged two to five and they've been asleep.

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Speaker 1: In a car after.

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Speaker 3: Day at the beach. I will never know this rest.

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We will never have that rest again. And good for Danny.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, big, big nap. Now.

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Speaker 2: I have a Danny story that took place last summer.

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When I'd agreed that I was going to cut down

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00:14:58,879 --> 00:15:01,360
on drinking, my wife and I took a trip to Sylvain.

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We met another couple up there. I proceeded to drink

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all day, knowing that we had reservations at a Michelin

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star rated restaurant. At seven o'clock. Five o'clock comes around,

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I am completely blacked out. I lay down on the

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pillow in the bed to be woken up with my

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wife kicking me and pushing me, telling me, hurry up,

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get up. And I was basically blackout that entire dinner,

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and she mocked me, made me know how disappointed she

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00:15:29,360 --> 00:15:31,320
was in me. The next day and the whole time,

316
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I'm thinking, this is my one day away from my

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00:15:33,480 --> 00:15:36,399
fucking kids. Jesus Christ, right, right, So that's why I

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00:15:36,440 --> 00:15:38,039
defend Danny on this particular night.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, but.

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Speaker 1: You know it's it's listen, call me a fucking call

321
00:15:44,759 --> 00:15:49,399
me a puritan, but I'm going to hold the pretty

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00:15:49,519 --> 00:15:52,919
lame opinion that it is never okay to be a

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00:15:52,960 --> 00:15:55,360
blackout drug at a nice dinner like that.

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Speaker 2: Well, to be fair, I was blackout before. I was

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black out before.

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Speaker 1: Well listen, Danny is a drunk and Neia and him

327
00:16:03,480 --> 00:16:05,360
head upstairs, and Nia's like, do you have any idea

328
00:16:05,440 --> 00:16:08,159
what I just went through? And he says no, and

329
00:16:08,200 --> 00:16:11,879
that's because he was. He was blackouts right.

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00:16:11,919 --> 00:16:13,799
Speaker 2: He's still slurring too, which was kind of funny.

331
00:16:14,240 --> 00:16:16,200
Speaker 1: Nea tells him that he drank too much and his

332
00:16:16,360 --> 00:16:20,759
response is, what the fuck are you fucking talking about?

333
00:16:21,840 --> 00:16:27,559
So anyways, we move on, We move on. Luke tried

334
00:16:27,600 --> 00:16:31,039
to Luke tried to finish all the ice cream, but

335
00:16:31,120 --> 00:16:33,320
he couldn't even All he could eat was ten and

336
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Luke is weird.

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00:16:35,840 --> 00:16:38,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, that was so nice to him to explain that

338
00:16:38,480 --> 00:16:40,399
to the cater crew because I'm sure they cared.

339
00:16:41,200 --> 00:16:44,000
Speaker 5: Ah. Yeah, that was so Luke of him. Yeah, that

340
00:16:44,159 --> 00:16:45,720
was very very Luke of him.

341
00:16:45,759 --> 00:16:52,200
Speaker 1: Now, Janet, let's the party know that Danny is a

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00:16:52,240 --> 00:16:57,919
little closet tequila gremlin. Yeah that will come up layter,

343
00:16:58,639 --> 00:17:00,639
But uh, you know, I just so bad for Nia

344
00:17:00,639 --> 00:17:03,120
because she's got to protect and be loyal to the

345
00:17:03,120 --> 00:17:04,880
man she loves. But the man that she loves is

346
00:17:04,880 --> 00:17:07,240
a little tequila greml he is.

347
00:17:07,680 --> 00:17:12,240
Speaker 2: But this is what we call a pilon. Okay, yes, again,

348
00:17:12,279 --> 00:17:14,000
I'm gonna sound like a broke rect this.

349
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Speaker 5: You're right.

350
00:17:14,799 --> 00:17:17,279
Speaker 1: This is textbook pilon.

351
00:17:17,480 --> 00:17:19,119
Speaker 2: This is textbook violin.

352
00:17:19,240 --> 00:17:19,799
Speaker 3: Look it up.

353
00:17:19,960 --> 00:17:24,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, look it up. If this was a Tuesday night, yeah,

354
00:17:24,759 --> 00:17:26,119
and they were all just supposed to go out to

355
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dinner and he behaved this way, which he probably has. Yeah,

356
00:17:29,880 --> 00:17:33,240
feel free to attack him like this where at an

357
00:17:33,279 --> 00:17:40,240
Airbnb in Wine Country. If you're going to sneak tequila

358
00:17:40,240 --> 00:17:43,400
and be a tequila greblin, do it now. This would

359
00:17:43,480 --> 00:17:47,039
be the time that most people would say, that's okay.

360
00:17:47,720 --> 00:17:48,519
Speaker 1: Yeah, I know.

361
00:17:48,960 --> 00:17:52,160
Speaker 3: If what I think I am at, I shouldn't speak

362
00:17:52,200 --> 00:17:54,359
for everyone. I'm scared I'm going to get a story

363
00:17:54,400 --> 00:17:57,599
of him being a tequila gremlin at his son's four

364
00:17:57,640 --> 00:18:02,240
year old birthday. And as long as we're not feeling it, okay, I.

365
00:18:02,200 --> 00:18:06,359
Speaker 1: Think we've got kind of a bit of a tapestry

366
00:18:06,440 --> 00:18:12,079
here for Danny, and it looks like hard work, loving father, right,

367
00:18:12,599 --> 00:18:15,119
and then oop, there's a blemish here, and it's where

368
00:18:15,119 --> 00:18:17,720
he gets all little and blacked out, and it happens,

369
00:18:18,240 --> 00:18:23,759
I think, like kind of a lot. So anyways, we

370
00:18:23,799 --> 00:18:26,279
wake the next morning and everyone heads home and here

371
00:18:26,680 --> 00:18:31,559
we go. We head out for a little hike with

372
00:18:31,599 --> 00:18:37,440
Michelle and Sheena Shay. Gina Shay says that they were

373
00:18:37,640 --> 00:18:43,079
watching her old dance videos and she was like, damn,

374
00:18:45,240 --> 00:18:49,839
and I'm wondering, who could possibly give a flying fuck

375
00:18:50,079 --> 00:18:55,319
about Sena Che's old dance videos and whatever Summer Moon

376
00:18:55,799 --> 00:18:58,799
is gabbing on about. I mean, she's four years old.

377
00:18:58,880 --> 00:19:01,920
Speaker 3: Ruby, go ahead, Okay, so I have an answer to

378
00:19:01,960 --> 00:19:05,279
your question. Who the fuck could care the fuck about that? Sheeniche?

379
00:19:05,880 --> 00:19:08,440
And the only thing we took from this hike was

380
00:19:08,519 --> 00:19:13,000
that Summer Moon is already concerned with how old she

381
00:19:13,160 --> 00:19:16,400
looks to other people, and Shina thinks that's cute, and

382
00:19:16,480 --> 00:19:20,759
Michelle thinks that Summer Moon is a good influence, and

383
00:19:20,839 --> 00:19:21,279
that's all.

384
00:19:21,519 --> 00:19:23,279
Speaker 1: Yeah, not happy about it.

385
00:19:23,480 --> 00:19:27,640
Speaker 2: Well, uh, well, apparently I didn't know that their kids

386
00:19:27,880 --> 00:19:31,880
were friends. Isabella knows Winter Mars pretty well. Yeah, And

387
00:19:31,920 --> 00:19:35,680
then I hope Sheinache's fat fuck of a husband gets

388
00:19:35,839 --> 00:19:40,680
h gets to gets to hand with Isabella.

389
00:19:40,960 --> 00:19:42,559
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's okay.

390
00:19:42,599 --> 00:19:47,359
Speaker 1: The thing that I was really concerned about is it's

391
00:19:47,359 --> 00:19:50,240
so interesting to me, you know, Michelle says to she

392
00:19:50,319 --> 00:19:51,880
and I don't know if you heard about what happened

393
00:19:51,880 --> 00:19:54,519
in Santa Barbara. And I was confused by that question

394
00:19:54,839 --> 00:19:59,680
because she niche is not there, why would she know?

395
00:20:00,400 --> 00:20:03,079
But she says, you know, I heard about it, and

396
00:20:03,119 --> 00:20:05,240
I'm just like, but you're not on the show, so

397
00:20:05,359 --> 00:20:09,200
why are you here about it? And I don't want

398
00:20:09,240 --> 00:20:11,599
you to hear about it. I want you to go

399
00:20:12,160 --> 00:20:14,039
to a black site somewhere.

400
00:20:15,880 --> 00:20:18,079
Speaker 2: They better not brock, better notch up on the show.

401
00:20:18,200 --> 00:20:20,440
Speaker 1: Oh he's one hundred to show up on.

402
00:20:20,559 --> 00:20:23,559
Speaker 2: Maybe the finale. Now, something really important takes place in

403
00:20:23,599 --> 00:20:26,559
this little hike, okay, because they set these things up.

404
00:20:26,680 --> 00:20:29,119
This kind of blew my mind out, although I'm.

405
00:20:29,000 --> 00:20:30,160
Speaker 1: Not surprised crazy.

406
00:20:30,319 --> 00:20:36,559
Speaker 2: They discuss Aaron and Michelle mentions Jesse calling her a hooker.

407
00:20:36,440 --> 00:20:40,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, reasonably prized, reasonably price prostitute.

408
00:20:40,440 --> 00:20:43,160
Speaker 2: This really got onto Aaron's skin. And rather than punch

409
00:20:43,240 --> 00:20:46,559
Jesse in the face, he's just telling Michelle he doesn't

410
00:20:46,559 --> 00:20:48,119
think he can handle this and he might need to

411
00:20:48,160 --> 00:20:50,440
take off. Yeah, which is great because he's been telling

412
00:20:50,519 --> 00:20:53,799
Isabelle that he loves her right, so now two men

413
00:20:53,839 --> 00:20:55,200
in her life can disappoint her.

414
00:20:56,920 --> 00:21:02,559
Speaker 1: Yeah, I love the level of commitment to Michelle. You know,

415
00:21:04,359 --> 00:21:07,039
let's get a little nuts for me, so I'm gonna

416
00:21:07,039 --> 00:21:09,799
have to head out. I don't think that he's really

417
00:21:09,880 --> 00:21:12,720
suffering any of the consequences of this. I mean, perhaps

418
00:21:12,839 --> 00:21:16,119
the girlfriend who's having sex with old guys from Baywatch

419
00:21:16,119 --> 00:21:20,799
from the nineties is litigating against his honey company. But

420
00:21:20,920 --> 00:21:23,759
outside of Michelle just being kind of emotionally text I

421
00:21:23,759 --> 00:21:28,119
don't know what he's really dealing with. So crazy eyes,

422
00:21:28,880 --> 00:21:32,799
I think is piling on right now unnecessarily.

423
00:21:32,920 --> 00:21:34,759
Speaker 2: So are they still together?

424
00:21:35,319 --> 00:21:35,799
Speaker 1: Do we know?

425
00:21:36,119 --> 00:21:39,599
Speaker 3: Yeah, she moved into his home with her daughter.

426
00:21:39,839 --> 00:21:46,880
Speaker 1: Oh good, I wonder if he's there. Final final thing

427
00:21:46,960 --> 00:21:50,359
to say about this is that she and Shay's sunglasses

428
00:21:50,480 --> 00:21:55,039
are stupid. Kid. All right, let's get to Jesse's house.

429
00:21:55,079 --> 00:21:58,279
Speaker 2: This is my favorite party. Yeah, favorite part.

430
00:21:58,480 --> 00:22:00,279
Speaker 1: This is a great episode. I know I gave it

431
00:22:00,400 --> 00:22:02,599
zero bumps, but okay.

432
00:22:02,359 --> 00:22:04,240
Speaker 3: I just have to start the scene off by saying,

433
00:22:04,400 --> 00:22:06,279
and this may be too deep of a cut for

434
00:22:06,319 --> 00:22:09,440
you too, but you also may know this man is

435
00:22:09,480 --> 00:22:13,279
the equivalent to the character that Catherine Hahn plays in

436
00:22:13,359 --> 00:22:16,200
Kate Hudson's apartment when she pretends to be a therapist

437
00:22:16,279 --> 00:22:17,839
and how to Lose a guy in ten Days. This

438
00:22:17,960 --> 00:22:21,440
man is a joke and he made me laugh out loud.

439
00:22:21,480 --> 00:22:22,640
I thought it was amazing.

440
00:22:22,799 --> 00:22:25,039
Speaker 1: Okay, let me break I can break down the game flow,

441
00:22:25,079 --> 00:22:26,640
it can I really quickly.

442
00:22:26,920 --> 00:22:29,000
Speaker 5: Just wax on life coaches for a second.

443
00:22:29,000 --> 00:22:32,200
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, they're great. Life coach slash marriage coaches are

444
00:22:32,279 --> 00:22:33,039
also awesome.

445
00:22:33,160 --> 00:22:38,680
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, so he comes highly recommended. And the beauty

446
00:22:38,680 --> 00:22:42,119
about this profession is that we're deserving of it right

447
00:22:42,119 --> 00:22:45,119
now because we're not in a good spot culturally. So

448
00:22:47,720 --> 00:22:52,039
life coaches need to do two things. They need to

449
00:22:52,160 --> 00:22:58,160
exercise and they need to regurgitate self help books. Okay,

450
00:22:58,759 --> 00:23:03,319
if you are in shape and can do that successfully,

451
00:23:04,240 --> 00:23:08,559
you can siphon away millions of dollars from people who

452
00:23:08,640 --> 00:23:14,400
are either too busy or too stupid to care. And

453
00:23:14,400 --> 00:23:16,160
that is exactly what this guy is.

454
00:23:16,400 --> 00:23:19,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, I will say so. Scott the marriage coach slash

455
00:23:20,039 --> 00:23:23,680
life coach. He shows up and Jesse hired him after

456
00:23:23,680 --> 00:23:26,200
he did such a great job with marriage counseling.

457
00:23:27,319 --> 00:23:28,319
Speaker 1: That's worth pointing.

458
00:23:28,119 --> 00:23:30,680
Speaker 2: Out yeah, yeah, and then they get right into it

459
00:23:30,720 --> 00:23:32,240
because you know, you just dig into the guts of

460
00:23:32,400 --> 00:23:32,880
Now that's.

461
00:23:32,759 --> 00:23:35,640
Speaker 1: Such a good point. You wonder you know where the

462
00:23:35,759 --> 00:23:40,160
retention is coming from, what is motivating the retention because

463
00:23:40,200 --> 00:23:43,200
the marriage is not going well, No, I would say

464
00:23:43,240 --> 00:23:45,400
it's not even a marriage anymore, not anymore.

465
00:23:46,519 --> 00:23:49,559
Speaker 2: So let's I don't know, maybe he's failing upward as

466
00:23:49,559 --> 00:23:52,920
they say. Yeah, well, Jesse mentions that Michelle has been

467
00:23:52,960 --> 00:23:56,480
projecting and that's why he called her a whore, and

468
00:23:56,599 --> 00:24:00,559
Scott agrees. Yeah, he said, it's a nasty little plan playbook,

469
00:24:01,039 --> 00:24:04,559
nasty little play And that's when life coach Scott lays

470
00:24:04,599 --> 00:24:07,680
down a metaphor and I want you to track this. Yeah,

471
00:24:07,839 --> 00:24:10,880
that's what a good life coach does. They, as you

472
00:24:10,920 --> 00:24:13,680
pointed out, they read self help books and they regurgitate them.

473
00:24:13,960 --> 00:24:16,200
Some just fly by the seat of their pants off

474
00:24:16,279 --> 00:24:20,440
their dome and they lay down gold like this, Scott,

475
00:24:20,759 --> 00:24:22,960
the life coach says, and I quote Jesse, you are

476
00:24:23,039 --> 00:24:26,920
a garden, and water helps a garden, and a seed

477
00:24:26,960 --> 00:24:30,039
grows in a garden. Seeds need water to grow. And

478
00:24:30,079 --> 00:24:32,400
when your wife has sex in that garden with a

479
00:24:32,599 --> 00:24:36,359
honey harmster. The flowers won't grow, so scream into this pillow,

480
00:24:36,440 --> 00:24:37,960
you idiot, and hand me my money.

481
00:24:38,079 --> 00:24:40,240
Speaker 5: Yeah yeah, well and he does.

482
00:24:40,359 --> 00:24:43,839
Speaker 1: If she's having sex with a honey harvester in the garden,

483
00:24:44,200 --> 00:24:46,319
then all of the plants will get all smushed up.

484
00:24:46,920 --> 00:24:48,079
That's that's what he's saying.

485
00:24:48,200 --> 00:24:49,559
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, you can't grow.

486
00:24:49,799 --> 00:24:53,039
Speaker 1: So a couple roubs any thoughts on that.

487
00:24:53,519 --> 00:24:55,799
Speaker 3: Well, so then I would recommend that you don't plant

488
00:24:55,880 --> 00:24:58,759
anything of like actual that. No flowers there, no, you know,

489
00:24:58,799 --> 00:25:01,279
no food, maybe just grass there, maybe just dirt, maybe

490
00:25:01,279 --> 00:25:03,759
wood chips to deter them from fucking in your garden.

491
00:25:03,839 --> 00:25:05,720
Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, if you're gonna do that, you're gonna get

492
00:25:05,759 --> 00:25:08,759
some splinters. You're not gonna be happy about it. Jesse

493
00:25:08,960 --> 00:25:11,519
says before they get into any of that stuff that

494
00:25:11,640 --> 00:25:18,480
he has not grieved whether he won or if he's right,

495
00:25:22,279 --> 00:25:25,960
which is uh, yeah, I don't.

496
00:25:26,559 --> 00:25:34,000
Speaker 2: Being right means you actually lost. Yeah, if you're winning

497
00:25:34,039 --> 00:25:36,880
a verbal disagreement with your spouse.

498
00:25:36,759 --> 00:25:37,640
Speaker 1: You're both losing.

499
00:25:37,920 --> 00:25:39,480
Speaker 5: Yeah, definitely definitely.

500
00:25:39,559 --> 00:25:45,559
Speaker 1: But but yeah, Rubes, go ahead before I I.

501
00:25:44,200 --> 00:25:46,079
Speaker 3: Well, yeah, I guess I'm not married yet, so I'll

502
00:25:46,119 --> 00:25:49,119
take that path. But I think that he the word

503
00:25:49,160 --> 00:25:52,119
that you're looking for, Dylan is disgusting.

504
00:25:52,319 --> 00:25:53,480
Speaker 2: Okay, he is he?

505
00:25:53,640 --> 00:25:57,119
Speaker 3: No, he's he's a sciy skiwy many and I don't

506
00:25:57,160 --> 00:25:58,920
like any of the shoes that he wears. And I

507
00:25:58,960 --> 00:26:02,119
think that sometimes his answer too short and too tight.

508
00:26:03,160 --> 00:26:07,599
Speaker 1: Yeah, so this is textbook, textbook life coach stuff.

509
00:26:07,640 --> 00:26:07,799
Speaker 5: Right.

510
00:26:08,359 --> 00:26:11,079
Speaker 1: So he's exercised, he's in shape. Now he's come over

511
00:26:12,279 --> 00:26:15,599
and he is spouting out a metaphor about a garden

512
00:26:15,680 --> 00:26:20,079
and your attention being water. Now there is no real

513
00:26:20,799 --> 00:26:23,960
practical exercise or application.

514
00:26:24,599 --> 00:26:24,799
Speaker 5: Right.

515
00:26:25,400 --> 00:26:29,759
Speaker 1: What the life coach does is give you the vagary

516
00:26:29,799 --> 00:26:32,880
of all of it, right, and it sounds beautiful, but

517
00:26:33,079 --> 00:26:36,640
you really can do almost nothing with it because you

518
00:26:37,200 --> 00:26:40,000
Jesse knows where the end goal is. You know, he

519
00:26:40,039 --> 00:26:44,119
hasn't quite crystallized it into Oh, my attention is water

520
00:26:44,240 --> 00:26:47,039
and I should sprayk tomatoes instead of poison ivy. But

521
00:26:47,160 --> 00:26:48,960
he knows that he needs to get to that point.

522
00:26:49,160 --> 00:26:51,240
What the life coach is going to do is make

523
00:26:51,319 --> 00:26:55,279
it all poetic, but really give him no, no, no

524
00:26:55,440 --> 00:26:57,119
way of getting there whatsoever.

525
00:26:57,240 --> 00:26:59,640
Speaker 2: As a life coach, that's not your job. It's to

526
00:26:59,759 --> 00:27:04,440
just throw out nonsensical metaphors and have your client spend

527
00:27:04,480 --> 00:27:05,960
the next day or two trying to figure it out.

528
00:27:06,160 --> 00:27:06,319
Speaker 5: Right.

529
00:27:07,039 --> 00:27:10,279
Speaker 3: Well, he does give him one concrete piece of advice, right,

530
00:27:10,319 --> 00:27:13,279
and he says, you know why scream into a pillow? Okay?

531
00:27:13,799 --> 00:27:16,559
And he says, because you're gonna end up doing one

532
00:27:16,559 --> 00:27:18,559
of one of two things, my guy, You're gonna laugh

533
00:27:18,640 --> 00:27:20,599
or you're gonna cry. And I would like to point

534
00:27:20,640 --> 00:27:23,640
out that Jesse actually ends up doing neither of those things.

535
00:27:23,720 --> 00:27:26,160
Speaker 1: It's important that we got that out. And it's also

536
00:27:26,240 --> 00:27:30,440
important that if you're going to try to get better

537
00:27:30,559 --> 00:27:33,920
with your mental health, you do it through oh an

538
00:27:34,000 --> 00:27:35,039
avenue that is not.

539
00:27:35,359 --> 00:27:38,480
Speaker 2: Oh, not one of these facta life coaches you find

540
00:27:38,519 --> 00:27:40,039
on I don't know, Craigslist.

541
00:27:40,240 --> 00:27:43,599
Speaker 1: Yeah, No, you want to go to Rula, Today's sponsor

542
00:27:43,799 --> 00:27:46,559
of the podcast, Pat You've used Rula before.

543
00:27:46,359 --> 00:27:48,440
Speaker 2: I have, and I'm feeling a lot better. I'm going

544
00:27:48,480 --> 00:27:50,799
to talk about it on APS. Sorry for shameless plug

545
00:27:50,839 --> 00:27:52,880
in the middle of an ad read. My wife told

546
00:27:52,880 --> 00:27:56,240
me this week after our eight year wedding anniversary yesterday,

547
00:27:56,279 --> 00:27:58,759
said I love you more today than I did on

548
00:27:58,799 --> 00:28:01,279
the day we married. And that's because of the work

549
00:28:01,319 --> 00:28:03,160
that I've been doing with Rula.

550
00:28:03,440 --> 00:28:05,359
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, you know, a lot of other podcast

551
00:28:05,359 --> 00:28:09,119
sponsors will tell you like you can have your phone

552
00:28:09,160 --> 00:28:13,279
locked away in safe or you can have better focus

553
00:28:13,400 --> 00:28:16,359
or lose weight. But Rula will if you put in

554
00:28:16,400 --> 00:28:19,480
the work, have your life partner look across from you

555
00:28:19,559 --> 00:28:21,160
and say I love you more than I did a

556
00:28:21,200 --> 00:28:23,720
decade ago. And that's the most priceless thing that you

557
00:28:23,759 --> 00:28:27,359
could possibly get. So with Rula, you can find the

558
00:28:27,440 --> 00:28:31,799
right therapist for you in network covered care for most

559
00:28:31,839 --> 00:28:36,839
major insurances. You can pay as little fifteen dollars per session. Okay,

560
00:28:37,279 --> 00:28:42,440
dedicate quality care to the therapy progress.

561
00:28:42,480 --> 00:28:42,759
Speaker 5: Okay.

562
00:28:42,839 --> 00:28:46,039
Speaker 1: Rula is committed to see you succeed in reaching your

563
00:28:46,039 --> 00:28:49,240
therapy goals. Make sure their providers are carefully screened and veedded,

564
00:28:49,599 --> 00:28:52,400
monitoring the quality of their care and helping you monitor

565
00:28:52,480 --> 00:28:55,920
your progress in therapy. It's a great company. It's a

566
00:28:55,960 --> 00:29:00,960
really really great company. If you're looking for therapy, and

567
00:29:01,839 --> 00:29:03,920
let's say you live in a remote area, or you

568
00:29:03,960 --> 00:29:06,160
don't you're not in network at a lot of places

569
00:29:06,160 --> 00:29:06,680
around you.

570
00:29:06,920 --> 00:29:09,799
Speaker 2: Or you want to change your uh your therapist because

571
00:29:09,920 --> 00:29:12,079
you're not connecting. Will allows you to do that.

572
00:29:12,200 --> 00:29:14,559
Speaker 1: Yeah, one hundred percent. Thousands have already trusted really to

573
00:29:14,559 --> 00:29:17,000
support them on their journey toward improved mental health and

574
00:29:17,039 --> 00:29:19,440
overall well being. Head over to ruler dot com slash

575
00:29:19,480 --> 00:29:22,480
bad tv to get started today. After you sign up,

576
00:29:22,640 --> 00:29:26,119
they ask you where you heard about them. Please support

577
00:29:26,119 --> 00:29:28,200
our show and tell them that our show sent you.

578
00:29:28,480 --> 00:29:31,440
Go to r u la dot com slash bad tv

579
00:29:31,519 --> 00:29:33,799
and take the first step towards better mental health today.

580
00:29:33,799 --> 00:29:38,119
You deserve quality care from someone who cares. All right,

581
00:29:38,240 --> 00:29:41,680
let's get back to the show. We get to Luke

582
00:29:41,720 --> 00:29:45,559
and Kristen and we close on the Onyx fireplace that

583
00:29:45,960 --> 00:29:50,839
is the main kind of centerpiece for their show. Their

584
00:29:50,880 --> 00:29:56,640
their new rental, the first step in Luke's big plan

585
00:29:56,880 --> 00:29:59,559
for the future. This rental is now Jasmine heads over

586
00:29:59,640 --> 00:30:01,880
to the backyard. I gotta say, there's a lot of

587
00:30:01,960 --> 00:30:05,720
houses in Los Angeles with a lot of concrete that's

588
00:30:05,720 --> 00:30:07,759
too much. I go to a lot of people's houses

589
00:30:07,759 --> 00:30:09,759
and it's like, there's a lot of concrete here in

590
00:30:09,799 --> 00:30:10,240
the well.

591
00:30:10,759 --> 00:30:14,640
Speaker 3: It's because before we when we used to care about

592
00:30:14,680 --> 00:30:19,880
things that mattered, we didn't feel comfortable spending all of

593
00:30:19,920 --> 00:30:22,279
the time and resources and money that we do to

594
00:30:22,440 --> 00:30:25,279
water lawn so that we could look like the Cinderella

595
00:30:25,400 --> 00:30:28,039
Story lawn. Yeah it, Jennifer Coolidge has in the opening

596
00:30:28,079 --> 00:30:30,920
scene because we're in a fucking desert. Dylan, Okay, so

597
00:30:31,359 --> 00:30:33,480
enjoy your pool and your lack of grass.

598
00:30:33,599 --> 00:30:36,519
Speaker 1: Give me the give me the grass. I want the grass.

599
00:30:36,640 --> 00:30:40,960
Speaker 2: It's referred to as hardscaping and real heart escaping. By

600
00:30:40,960 --> 00:30:43,680
the way, just saw a Cinderella Story two days ago,

601
00:30:43,799 --> 00:30:48,160
had Allie watch's it's uh, it's kind of all over

602
00:30:48,200 --> 00:30:48,640
the place?

603
00:30:48,960 --> 00:30:49,799
Speaker 1: Is that with Brandy?

604
00:30:50,200 --> 00:30:53,640
Speaker 3: It's with It's with Hillary Duff and Chad Michael Murray Patrick,

605
00:30:53,759 --> 00:30:54,720
What are you about to say?

606
00:30:55,599 --> 00:30:57,000
Speaker 2: Well, to be fair, we haven't finished it.

607
00:30:57,119 --> 00:31:00,359
Speaker 1: Her ugly say you liked it. I liked a lot.

608
00:31:01,240 --> 00:31:02,759
Speaker 3: You're gonna love the ending, I will.

609
00:31:04,319 --> 00:31:08,880
Speaker 1: I saw the new movie Hurry Up Tomorrow with the Weekend. Oh,

610
00:31:08,960 --> 00:31:10,000
I saw a billboard for that.

611
00:31:10,279 --> 00:31:11,319
Speaker 5: Yeah, how is it?

612
00:31:11,960 --> 00:31:16,680
Speaker 1: Uh? I don't think it's for everyone. Stick to singing now,

613
00:31:16,759 --> 00:31:19,160
Jasmine heads over to the backyard. There's a what like

614
00:31:19,200 --> 00:31:21,960
we mentioned, there's a lot of concrete. I'm looking at

615
00:31:21,960 --> 00:31:23,960
those metal safety bars coming out of the pool and

616
00:31:23,960 --> 00:31:26,720
I'm just thinking about getting third degree burns when I

617
00:31:26,720 --> 00:31:28,039
grab them on a really hot day.

618
00:31:28,039 --> 00:31:29,079
Speaker 5: It's actually really scary.

619
00:31:29,319 --> 00:31:32,400
Speaker 1: They talked about Nia and Danny, and Luke has a

620
00:31:32,440 --> 00:31:34,920
really great contribution to the conversation. He says that when

621
00:31:34,960 --> 00:31:37,880
Danny's tired, can you not just ask if he's drunk?

622
00:31:38,279 --> 00:31:42,920
And Luke is really weird? And that's really all I

623
00:31:43,119 --> 00:31:47,400
personally have to say about Luke's contribution in that moment. Really,

624
00:31:47,920 --> 00:31:48,599
Luke gets the.

625
00:31:48,559 --> 00:31:53,480
Speaker 2: Award for the most Unlikely Reality TV cast member on Brava.

626
00:31:53,920 --> 00:31:58,039
Speaker 1: Yeah right, because I would say, just in general, because

627
00:31:58,240 --> 00:32:01,240
if you look at let's say, a toothless kind of

628
00:32:01,359 --> 00:32:04,039
crackhead from the Ozarks.

629
00:32:05,799 --> 00:32:07,680
Speaker 2: Or Love Afterlock, you could one hundred percent.

630
00:32:07,599 --> 00:32:10,839
Speaker 1: See them on those shows. Luke is in this strange

631
00:32:10,960 --> 00:32:14,480
sliver of you don't belong to that, and you definitely

632
00:32:14,480 --> 00:32:17,160
don't belong to this, So he's in a bit of

633
00:32:17,160 --> 00:32:18,759
an enigma. He's a weird guy.

634
00:32:18,799 --> 00:32:20,480
Speaker 2: It's a purgatory of normancy.

635
00:32:20,880 --> 00:32:24,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah, you guys are weird. Luke is very

636
00:32:25,559 --> 00:32:27,480
I think I don't think he's weird at all. Dylan

637
00:32:27,480 --> 00:32:29,920
and I actually think that Luke is somebody who I

638
00:32:29,920 --> 00:32:33,039
would really want to like me, if not love me,

639
00:32:33,119 --> 00:32:35,359
and he wouldn't, he would hate me, and that's very clear.

640
00:32:35,920 --> 00:32:38,559
But he's he's the only good person on the show,

641
00:32:38,559 --> 00:32:39,640
if there's any good people.

642
00:32:39,680 --> 00:32:42,119
Speaker 1: I think, Oh no, I completely disagree with you. I

643
00:32:42,200 --> 00:32:44,160
do not think that Luke is a good person.

644
00:32:44,279 --> 00:32:46,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, Kristen.

645
00:32:46,079 --> 00:32:48,559
Speaker 1: I think that he loves getting in the mess, and

646
00:32:48,599 --> 00:32:53,039
I think that he's fucking weird shit. Okay, so all.

647
00:32:53,000 --> 00:32:55,119
Speaker 2: Right, well Jasmine, I didn't get this conversation. Does she

648
00:32:55,119 --> 00:32:58,200
have regrets about going hard on Danny dark side or

649
00:32:58,319 --> 00:33:02,039
she felt bad about going hard at NIA because Danny

650
00:33:02,119 --> 00:33:04,559
darkse eyed me such a drunk nia Yeah, ladder sorry,

651
00:33:04,599 --> 00:33:05,359
yeah later.

652
00:33:05,359 --> 00:33:07,519
Speaker 1: Oka and yeah, she says that it's hard to be

653
00:33:07,559 --> 00:33:10,759
in a queer relationship. Not really, but also yes really

654
00:33:10,839 --> 00:33:16,440
because Danny would never ever have gone up and done

655
00:33:16,440 --> 00:33:20,759
this to Jazzmine if she was with a man, he

656
00:33:20,880 --> 00:33:24,240
never would have done it. I don't think I agree.

657
00:33:24,359 --> 00:33:26,680
Speaker 3: No, you're you're I think that you're right, or let

658
00:33:26,720 --> 00:33:31,519
me tell, let me redirect. If he did, he would

659
00:33:31,519 --> 00:33:33,359
have been harmed physically.

660
00:33:33,440 --> 00:33:38,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, yep. So that's sad, but we're getting better. We're

661
00:33:38,440 --> 00:33:40,400
trying to get better. Now we head over to the

662
00:33:40,400 --> 00:33:45,200
great Kyle Chan. Kyle Chan's got great stuff. He has

663
00:33:45,359 --> 00:33:49,599
lovely crystal and he has actually gold bars. I don't

664
00:33:49,640 --> 00:33:51,240
know if you guys caught that, but he's just got

665
00:33:51,319 --> 00:33:52,680
gold bars out.

666
00:33:53,160 --> 00:33:58,240
Speaker 2: How does he continue to find himself on this shell?

667
00:33:59,200 --> 00:34:01,640
Is it because he will let his store be filmed

668
00:34:01,640 --> 00:34:04,160
at for free? If you remember, famously, she de Schey

669
00:34:04,799 --> 00:34:08,679
filmed her rockout version of Good as Gold in the shop.

670
00:34:09,559 --> 00:34:13,760
Speaker 3: I think he thinks it's advertising I wrote down. I

671
00:34:13,800 --> 00:34:17,079
will not write anything down because this scene does not matter.

672
00:34:18,400 --> 00:34:21,519
Speaker 1: Yeah, and Luke is going over budget for the ring,

673
00:34:21,599 --> 00:34:25,559
but that doesn't matter because he loves Kristen. Now, Isabella

674
00:34:25,599 --> 00:34:33,280
and Jesse chicken and broccoli and French fries from the Chateau. Dylan, Yeah,

675
00:34:33,320 --> 00:34:38,920
we both tracked it. This may be the grossest thing

676
00:34:38,960 --> 00:34:40,800
that Danny has done all season.

677
00:34:40,960 --> 00:34:42,159
Speaker 2: Jesse Jesse.

678
00:34:42,320 --> 00:34:47,079
Speaker 1: Yeah, it is so indicative of a sick human being

679
00:34:47,719 --> 00:34:52,039
to tell a four year old where the French fries

680
00:34:52,199 --> 00:34:56,119
came from, because they came from where they came from.

681
00:34:57,320 --> 00:35:00,880
Speaker 2: Could be a little of that. Although my darling daughter Ellie,

682
00:35:00,920 --> 00:35:04,639
she knows where cheeseburgers are coming from. She definitely has

683
00:35:04,719 --> 00:35:08,639
her favorite spots. Really, Okay, yeah, Isabelle maybe a fan

684
00:35:08,719 --> 00:35:10,679
of the Chateau Chateau.

685
00:35:11,519 --> 00:35:13,920
Speaker 1: Okay, maybe I'm looking too much into it, Ruby.

686
00:35:14,239 --> 00:35:16,360
Speaker 3: No, Okay, I don't. I think that he's a dick

687
00:35:16,400 --> 00:35:18,679
and probably only tells her when things are from places

688
00:35:18,679 --> 00:35:22,079
like sure, But I also think that the more concerning

689
00:35:22,079 --> 00:35:24,239
thing to me was that we start the scene with

690
00:35:24,360 --> 00:35:26,119
his four year old picking her nose, being a four

691
00:35:26,239 --> 00:35:28,360
year old, and he goes, Isabella, why don't you turn

692
00:35:28,400 --> 00:35:29,280
on a little iPad?

693
00:35:29,719 --> 00:35:29,920
Speaker 1: Oh?

694
00:35:30,159 --> 00:35:33,239
Speaker 3: Hey, Jesse, Hey Jesse, walk out of your door, don't return,

695
00:35:33,440 --> 00:35:35,559
don't return. Call Michelle, but don't come back. Right.

696
00:35:36,199 --> 00:35:38,519
Speaker 1: Well, you know people need the iPad sometimes, But I

697
00:35:39,119 --> 00:35:44,800
want to amend that. I think calling Michelle a reasonably

698
00:35:44,880 --> 00:35:48,239
priced prostitute it's probably worse than this, but this is

699
00:35:48,280 --> 00:35:56,000
still gross. Now Isabella wants a key, Michelle brings it over,

700
00:35:56,039 --> 00:35:59,400
and he has a conversation about Isabella always winning. Now

701
00:35:59,519 --> 00:36:02,280
I can't for this. I think it's bad parenting. But

702
00:36:02,599 --> 00:36:04,280
I feel like I'm gonna do the exact same thing.

703
00:36:04,320 --> 00:36:06,440
Speaker 3: You will, you will, so.

704
00:36:08,159 --> 00:36:11,800
Speaker 1: We we, Jess.

705
00:36:11,880 --> 00:36:14,159
Speaker 3: That's not a bad that's not a reflection on you

706
00:36:14,199 --> 00:36:16,440
as a bad parent. I'm sure packed in the same thing.

707
00:36:16,880 --> 00:36:17,679
And that's that.

708
00:36:17,960 --> 00:36:20,519
Speaker 1: Now Jesse talks about the deep seated anger that he

709
00:36:20,639 --> 00:36:25,639
has towards Michelle, and it's so crazy to me, like

710
00:36:25,880 --> 00:36:27,519
Jesse can't get out of his own way. He's a

711
00:36:27,559 --> 00:36:32,599
psychologically damaged human being. All Jesse has to do is say,

712
00:36:33,039 --> 00:36:40,039
calmly once, I'm sorry, but I'm heartbroken and hurt that

713
00:36:40,079 --> 00:36:44,079
you cheated on me, and and she'll return fire with

714
00:36:44,119 --> 00:36:46,159
something you know you've You've just got to be ready

715
00:36:46,199 --> 00:36:47,880
to have a conversation because you've done a lot of

716
00:36:47,920 --> 00:36:51,199
bad things too. But like, just say that and not

717
00:36:51,559 --> 00:36:53,760
you're a whore who cheated on me, right, because then

718
00:36:53,800 --> 00:36:56,880
it doesn't really get delivered. The parcel doesn't get to

719
00:36:56,920 --> 00:36:58,480
the doorstep the way that you want to.

720
00:36:59,199 --> 00:37:00,440
Speaker 5: So it's it's.

721
00:37:00,320 --> 00:37:04,800
Speaker 2: Around my mom at my grandmother's funeral on my dad's side.

722
00:37:04,880 --> 00:37:08,400
They had not been together since nineteen seventy seven. He

723
00:37:08,440 --> 00:37:10,960
had put cigarettes out on her arm when she wasn't looking,

724
00:37:11,039 --> 00:37:15,119
when he was really drunk. He's abusive. Fast forward twenty

725
00:37:15,199 --> 00:37:17,719
years later, twenty five, whatever the fuck it was. I'm

726
00:37:17,760 --> 00:37:20,320
at the funeral for my grandma. My mom's there, my

727
00:37:20,400 --> 00:37:22,400
dad's there of course because his mother's fucking laying in

728
00:37:22,400 --> 00:37:24,800
a coffin. Yeah, yeah, yeah, And I'm standing next to

729
00:37:24,840 --> 00:37:30,000
my mom and she goes, God, your dad's handsome. And

730
00:37:30,039 --> 00:37:32,480
then they hugged each other and they were nice, is

731
00:37:32,519 --> 00:37:32,960
my point?

732
00:37:33,119 --> 00:37:33,280
Speaker 5: Yeah?

733
00:37:34,079 --> 00:37:38,039
Speaker 2: Time, No, no, I don't think so. Definitely time healed

734
00:37:38,559 --> 00:37:39,800
those cigarette wounds.

735
00:37:40,440 --> 00:37:43,360
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, no time and then the kind of white

736
00:37:43,400 --> 00:37:44,280
blood cells and.

737
00:37:44,280 --> 00:37:46,639
Speaker 3: Whatever newsporign factine.

738
00:37:46,679 --> 00:37:48,639
Speaker 5: Maybe yeah, but he shouldn't have done that.

739
00:37:48,880 --> 00:37:52,679
Speaker 1: Now Brittany has a lot. Oh no, she has a

740
00:37:52,719 --> 00:37:53,239
hot chef.

741
00:37:53,239 --> 00:37:53,599
Speaker 5: Come over.

742
00:37:53,760 --> 00:37:57,199
Speaker 1: Now. I clocked that this guy was super hot before

743
00:37:57,320 --> 00:37:59,239
the ladies even started talking about it. I was like,

744
00:37:59,320 --> 00:38:04,960
my god, this guy's hot, unbelievable. Now and this guy

745
00:38:05,119 --> 00:38:09,239
is he's clearly a sex addict. This guy goes around

746
00:38:09,599 --> 00:38:14,039
these homes and cooks these dinners and Dylan, then he

747
00:38:14,079 --> 00:38:16,960
has sex with lots and lots of people.

748
00:38:16,960 --> 00:38:17,960
Speaker 5: Pat back me up here.

749
00:38:18,079 --> 00:38:21,639
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, those private chefs coming in there. Yeah, I'll

750
00:38:21,639 --> 00:38:25,880
tell you. Taking a woman out to dinner that is

751
00:38:26,039 --> 00:38:28,800
four play, four sex. So when you're the private chef,

752
00:38:29,440 --> 00:38:31,800
you're already you know, in the middle of it.

753
00:38:32,000 --> 00:38:35,679
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, it's like really good four play food for play.

754
00:38:36,039 --> 00:38:38,599
Now we get ready for dinner with a little caviar service,

755
00:38:38,679 --> 00:38:41,039
and Nia is so sweet. She's married to a little

756
00:38:41,079 --> 00:38:49,199
tequila gremlin and after Halloween asked grabbing and daddy, get

757
00:38:49,239 --> 00:38:54,559
me a get daddy a drink. All that stuff that transpired.

758
00:38:54,639 --> 00:38:57,440
Dia says that her and Daniel are in a much

759
00:38:57,480 --> 00:39:03,079
better place, and Christen says, if anything, if anyone says

760
00:39:03,119 --> 00:39:05,840
anything bad about Nia, they're gonna have to go through me.

761
00:39:05,960 --> 00:39:09,320
And that is how I feel about Nia. Okay, I

762
00:39:09,400 --> 00:39:14,239
want everyone piping down. We've we've we've got it under control. Okay,

763
00:39:14,440 --> 00:39:17,199
let Nia cry about being homeless and let's just move on.

764
00:39:17,519 --> 00:39:18,119
Speaker 5: Okay.

765
00:39:18,199 --> 00:39:21,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, Nia employs attack to Kier and forgive me for

766
00:39:21,880 --> 00:39:24,199
a sounding cynical. I know some listeners are gonna have

767
00:39:24,199 --> 00:39:28,360
a problem with old Patty, but uh, when you are

768
00:39:28,400 --> 00:39:30,280
being attacked, the number one thing that you can do

769
00:39:30,360 --> 00:39:32,800
to combat that attack is to whip out the saddest

770
00:39:32,840 --> 00:39:36,880
story ever. You will shut down your detractors almost immediately,

771
00:39:37,440 --> 00:39:39,480
except for Janet, which we'll get to it a second.

772
00:39:39,480 --> 00:39:42,119
But Nia mentioned she's been through a lot, not just

773
00:39:42,199 --> 00:39:45,719
that marriage with that little dark syed Danny, but at

774
00:39:45,760 --> 00:39:49,400
some point she lived in a in a tent in

775
00:39:49,480 --> 00:39:54,079
people's backyards. It's a rough upbringing, yes me, Yeah, it's

776
00:39:54,079 --> 00:39:56,400
hard to it's hard to call someone out for being

777
00:39:56,400 --> 00:39:58,760
married to a little drunk when they lay down that.

778
00:39:58,760 --> 00:39:59,320
Speaker 5: Kind of story.

779
00:39:59,440 --> 00:40:02,199
Speaker 3: Yeah, And what I what I will say too, is

780
00:40:02,239 --> 00:40:06,119
it actually as fucking remarkable that she is as like

781
00:40:06,199 --> 00:40:08,280
gentle and nice and kind as she is with that

782
00:40:08,320 --> 00:40:10,519
type of vario. Like people can have that upbringing and

783
00:40:10,519 --> 00:40:13,159
turn out very differently. And I think that she's, you know,

784
00:40:13,480 --> 00:40:16,000
a little crazy obviously, but aren't we all? Am I right?

785
00:40:16,320 --> 00:40:17,000
Speaker 1: Yeah?

786
00:40:17,039 --> 00:40:21,079
Speaker 2: But what I mean I need more, I need more

787
00:40:21,639 --> 00:40:25,039
details to really put this story together. Is was Dad

788
00:40:25,079 --> 00:40:28,079
not in the picture? As she said, like Dad laughed

789
00:40:28,199 --> 00:40:28,599
or something?

790
00:40:28,679 --> 00:40:31,079
Speaker 1: Dad? I think I got it. Dad left, They hopped

791
00:40:31,079 --> 00:40:34,880
the fence, put up a tent in backyard, and then

792
00:40:35,039 --> 00:40:37,360
they were kicked out, and then she slept in.

793
00:40:39,440 --> 00:40:42,360
Speaker 5: Work parking lot and then Danny is drunk.

794
00:40:44,079 --> 00:40:46,440
Speaker 2: Ruby, you have anything that shed light on that?

795
00:40:47,039 --> 00:40:49,159
Speaker 3: The first The first thing that I thought about when

796
00:40:49,199 --> 00:40:53,079
Nia said how humiliating is that that you have to

797
00:40:53,079 --> 00:40:56,199
be woken up by your your you know, security guard

798
00:40:56,239 --> 00:40:59,480
parking lot in the parking lot, and like when you

799
00:40:59,559 --> 00:41:02,400
see it's Nia in the car, let her sleep, you

800
00:41:02,880 --> 00:41:07,280
hold security card, Like, I mean, come on, my guy, right, yeah, yeah.

801
00:41:07,000 --> 00:41:08,599
Speaker 1: It's some fat guy. Tell him you got to get

802
00:41:08,599 --> 00:41:09,079
the fuck.

803
00:41:08,960 --> 00:41:11,400
Speaker 3: Out of here, man, but right exactly.

804
00:41:11,280 --> 00:41:15,440
Speaker 1: Needs her beauty rest. Now we get to and I

805
00:41:15,480 --> 00:41:18,400
was confused as well as you. I'm not really sure

806
00:41:18,440 --> 00:41:20,599
what this had to do with Dandy big a little drug.

807
00:41:21,039 --> 00:41:24,039
Speaker 2: I mean it was a tactic. Dylan, Dylan, Dylan. I'm

808
00:41:24,159 --> 00:41:27,320
sitting at that table and I'm the drunk, and you

809
00:41:27,360 --> 00:41:28,440
and Ruby come at me.

810
00:41:28,760 --> 00:41:29,079
Speaker 5: Okay.

811
00:41:29,199 --> 00:41:33,800
Speaker 1: I I want to do this because I love you.

812
00:41:33,960 --> 00:41:37,119
I want to say that first and foremost, Okay, And

813
00:41:37,199 --> 00:41:39,199
I think Ruby feels the same way, right.

814
00:41:40,239 --> 00:41:40,800
Speaker 3: Mm hmmmm.

815
00:41:41,400 --> 00:41:42,679
Speaker 2: I think I know where you guys are going.

816
00:41:42,880 --> 00:41:45,639
Speaker 5: And before you.

817
00:41:44,559 --> 00:41:46,400
Speaker 2: Say, well, let me just get it out, I have

818
00:41:46,480 --> 00:41:52,800
aids right, right, So it wasn't through unprotected sex.

819
00:41:52,840 --> 00:41:54,840
Speaker 1: It was through a blood tres Yeah. Now I'm shut

820
00:41:54,840 --> 00:41:57,760
down completely right, that's right. The things that I wanted

821
00:41:57,760 --> 00:42:00,320
to talk to you about pale in comparison to the

822
00:42:00,360 --> 00:42:02,400
weight of what you've just told me, which is the

823
00:42:02,519 --> 00:42:02,960
u of ADS.

824
00:42:04,239 --> 00:42:07,679
Speaker 3: So but then but then there's a big in the

825
00:42:07,719 --> 00:42:12,400
background saying, yeah, that sucks. Pot. Anyways, who did and

826
00:42:12,440 --> 00:42:14,400
that's Janet Janet.

827
00:42:14,679 --> 00:42:17,320
Speaker 1: So just a really beautiful moment ends with Janet, who

828
00:42:18,360 --> 00:42:21,760
I thought she was going to be more evil this season,

829
00:42:21,960 --> 00:42:25,159
but she actually is not that evil, and I maybe

830
00:42:25,199 --> 00:42:27,800
I'll be the unpopular one in the room. I really

831
00:42:27,800 --> 00:42:32,400
don't think that what she did was all that bad, Janet.

832
00:42:33,000 --> 00:42:37,719
Speaker 2: She is, well, Nea finishes that very very very very

833
00:42:37,800 --> 00:42:41,599
sad story. Janet says, well, I'm happy you're finally opening up.

834
00:42:42,159 --> 00:42:47,239
But huh, Danny has a drunk Well, yeah, I know, drunks.

835
00:42:47,599 --> 00:42:50,760
Speaker 1: I was married to what. Yeah, no, it's it was

836
00:42:50,840 --> 00:42:53,559
very pointed and very messy, but I will say that,

837
00:42:53,960 --> 00:42:57,960
you know. Janet just says, maybe it's likely to hurt Nia,

838
00:42:58,039 --> 00:43:00,239
but maybe to help her wake up to the.

839
00:43:00,079 --> 00:43:03,440
Speaker 3: Fact that no, it's not at all.

840
00:43:04,519 --> 00:43:07,599
Speaker 1: She just says, you know, like you know a kumbaya.

841
00:43:07,679 --> 00:43:09,280
I know that you were homeless and everything, but like

842
00:43:09,840 --> 00:43:13,360
you're married to somebody with alcohol problems, okay.

843
00:43:13,400 --> 00:43:14,800
Speaker 5: And Nia's like, no, I'm not.

844
00:43:15,239 --> 00:43:17,039
Speaker 1: And Nia is wrong about that. She is married to

845
00:43:17,039 --> 00:43:22,079
somebody with alcohol problems. Now they go home and you

846
00:43:22,119 --> 00:43:27,800
can tell that Danny has alcohol problems because of how

847
00:43:27,840 --> 00:43:31,119
defensive he is when this gets brought up. She's like,

848
00:43:31,239 --> 00:43:34,239
Jane is such a fucking big bird bitch. I can't

849
00:43:34,280 --> 00:43:36,039
believe she said that. And He's like, I don't have

850
00:43:36,079 --> 00:43:38,239
a fucking drinking bro. What the fuck is wrong with

851
00:43:38,320 --> 00:43:41,280
I don't have a fucking drinking brother. It's like, what

852
00:43:41,320 --> 00:43:42,800
the fuck is wrong with her?

853
00:43:42,840 --> 00:43:45,760
Speaker 2: You know, I loved his explanation of the how pantry

854
00:43:45,760 --> 00:43:46,480
door closes.

855
00:43:46,679 --> 00:43:50,840
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, insane.

856
00:43:50,960 --> 00:43:54,000
Speaker 3: But also she's sitting in that bed the first time

857
00:43:54,000 --> 00:43:56,960
with him when she's in Santa Barbara, and she's like, okay,

858
00:43:57,079 --> 00:43:59,320
you were let me finish, Okay, let me finish. You

859
00:43:59,360 --> 00:44:01,639
were super tired, you had worked all day, you drove

860
00:44:01,639 --> 00:44:03,320
home really late at night and got up in the morning.

861
00:44:03,320 --> 00:44:05,119
And she just basically goes through what a day is

862
00:44:05,159 --> 00:44:07,880
for people who work, and then justifies him coming back

863
00:44:08,119 --> 00:44:12,000
and blacking out and then being blacked out. They'll do

864
00:44:12,119 --> 00:44:16,119
whatever they need to on camera. He is an alcohol problem.

865
00:44:16,199 --> 00:44:18,679
I do not think that it's fair what Janet is

866
00:44:18,800 --> 00:44:22,280
doing is trying to group him with drug and alcohol addicts,

867
00:44:22,360 --> 00:44:26,079
and it's like Mauricio fucking a nineteen year old. That's

868
00:44:26,119 --> 00:44:28,760
like Kyle's friends are probably saying things to her like,

869
00:44:28,840 --> 00:44:30,920
I mean, I'm not saying he's a pedophile, but it's

870
00:44:30,960 --> 00:44:33,039
just like, I don't know, it's kind of weird. It's like, oh, Okay,

871
00:44:33,239 --> 00:44:35,400
So what you're doing though by saying he doesn't like

872
00:44:35,519 --> 00:44:38,360
belong where Jacks is like, that's crazy, but it's just

873
00:44:38,400 --> 00:44:43,280
like he should examine his relationship with it. Oh oh careful.

874
00:44:43,599 --> 00:44:46,920
Speaker 1: Yeah you know he should though, because he's poorly explaining

875
00:44:46,920 --> 00:44:49,559
how cabinet doors closed. Yeah, he's trying to nip tequila.

876
00:44:49,679 --> 00:44:49,840
Speaker 3: Now.

877
00:44:49,880 --> 00:44:52,239
Speaker 2: If I'm Danny and Nia, we don't need to be

878
00:44:52,320 --> 00:44:55,920
spending any time fighting this out. What we need to

879
00:44:55,920 --> 00:44:58,400
do is fight fire with fire. They need to start

880
00:44:58,400 --> 00:45:01,440
digging up some dirt on Janet, neutralizing.

881
00:45:00,920 --> 00:45:04,599
Speaker 1: And I believe they will next week. I think Kristen

882
00:45:04,639 --> 00:45:09,679
looks to be deployed. Jason, don't judge anybody. Keep your

883
00:45:09,840 --> 00:45:11,800
ring on until then. Get in the comments. Let us

884
00:45:11,800 --> 00:45:13,159
know what we thought about the episode. Go to Rule

885
00:45:13,239 --> 00:45:15,639
and support the show. Support us at Patreon dot com.

886
00:45:15,960 --> 00:45:18,960
Another podcast network for aps, p MC lots of fun stuff,

887
00:45:19,000 --> 00:45:23,039
lots of fun baby content coming up and traders. Something

888
00:45:23,159 --> 00:45:26,519
will be around the corner in a couple of weeks.

889
00:45:27,039 --> 00:45:30,519
I'm Dylan saying goodbye, pat Say goodbye bye, guys, Bye

890
00:45:30,519 --> 00:45:56,079
bye