WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.320 --> 00:00:03.759 You're listening to KFI A six on demand. 2 00:00:06.440 --> 00:00:15.279 Scott, Welcome to the Jesus Christ Show. Hi Scott, you there? Hello? 3 00:00:15.919 --> 00:00:16.160 Hi? 4 00:00:16.719 --> 00:00:18.519 How can I help you? Hi? 5 00:00:18.679 --> 00:00:19.079 Jesus? 6 00:00:19.920 --> 00:00:23.320 What's going on? Scott? 7 00:00:24.160 --> 00:00:28.239 Recently I lost my wife of thirty four years. She 8 00:00:28.399 --> 00:00:29.000 passed away. 9 00:00:29.320 --> 00:00:30.199 I'm so sorry. 10 00:00:32.359 --> 00:00:36.200 A year ago I took her to the clinic. I've 11 00:00:36.240 --> 00:00:38.240 been out worked for two and a half years, with 12 00:00:38.359 --> 00:00:43.320 no income, no sistance. The local clinic is where I 13 00:00:43.359 --> 00:00:46.240 took her to and they were the only thing open 14 00:00:46.320 --> 00:00:53.759 to us. And they didn't diagnose her with cancer. They 15 00:00:53.799 --> 00:01:01.119 never ran any test for cancer. She was fifty three. 16 00:01:01.799 --> 00:01:06.680 And I've continually tried to you know, I've given it 17 00:01:06.760 --> 00:01:08.879 over to the Lord, and I kind of envisioned it 18 00:01:08.920 --> 00:01:12.760 as laying it on his altar for him to take 19 00:01:12.799 --> 00:01:24.079 care of. Oh yeah, I've felt through other times in 20 00:01:24.200 --> 00:01:28.840 my life that that's what the Lord would have me do, 21 00:01:30.480 --> 00:01:37.319 is to take these things, these problems, these unfair things, 22 00:01:39.159 --> 00:01:43.079 and take them to him and leave it there and forgive. 23 00:01:45.319 --> 00:01:46.840 It's been very hard. 24 00:01:48.280 --> 00:01:50.959 And now that brings you to today. And what's your 25 00:01:51.040 --> 00:01:52.760 question for me today? 26 00:01:53.519 --> 00:01:56.719 Am I right in doing that? Is that the right thing? 27 00:01:57.319 --> 00:01:59.840 In bringing your woes before. 28 00:02:01.560 --> 00:02:06.359 Well, yeah, the devil always tempts me to take it 29 00:02:06.439 --> 00:02:08.360 back and I have to. You know, he shoves it 30 00:02:08.400 --> 00:02:11.400 in my face and I just say no, I have 31 00:02:11.479 --> 00:02:13.759 to take it back and put it back on the altar. 32 00:02:14.319 --> 00:02:17.120 Well, that's what the enemy does. I mean, the enemy 33 00:02:17.199 --> 00:02:21.039 is trying to spread doubt. But do you feel that 34 00:02:21.360 --> 00:02:27.400 it was every hospital, Every doctor is a human being, 35 00:02:27.599 --> 00:02:31.120 and every hospital is filled with human beings. They can 36 00:02:31.240 --> 00:02:35.080 make mistakes and some of them lead to death. You 37 00:02:35.240 --> 00:02:41.120 have to and many people are misdiagnosed or undiagnosed when 38 00:02:41.120 --> 00:02:44.960 they go into any place. So it's more when it 39 00:02:45.000 --> 00:02:50.479 comes to action or being, you know, suing or doing 40 00:02:50.560 --> 00:02:53.840 any sort of reaction in that sense, you have to 41 00:02:53.879 --> 00:02:56.840 look at whether you believe it to be negligence, and 42 00:02:56.879 --> 00:02:58.919 the reason why you'd want to sue or make a 43 00:02:58.960 --> 00:03:02.199 big deal out of something that was negligent. It was 44 00:03:02.479 --> 00:03:07.319 in hopes of keeping others safe in a similar or 45 00:03:08.360 --> 00:03:13.960 even different circumstance. That would apply the judgment of those individuals, 46 00:03:14.000 --> 00:03:15.840 and you want to say, hey, listen, I don't think 47 00:03:15.879 --> 00:03:19.479 these individuals are judging well when it comes to these 48 00:03:19.639 --> 00:03:24.199 medical issues. And you shed light on it. But if 49 00:03:24.280 --> 00:03:26.800 it's just a mistake and it's something that could have 50 00:03:26.879 --> 00:03:33.879 happened outside of gross negligence, then you have to just 51 00:03:34.000 --> 00:03:38.719 understand that's the way some things go. People will miss things. 52 00:03:38.759 --> 00:03:43.280 There's also doctors that catch things and save lives, but 53 00:03:44.080 --> 00:03:49.719 it's a process of diagnosis and not exactly the most 54 00:03:49.759 --> 00:03:54.879 perfect science. Do you feel that they were negligent? 55 00:03:59.680 --> 00:04:03.000 Well, you know, telling us that it was MS, and 56 00:04:03.039 --> 00:04:07.159 I even telling us that could be cancer, considering her 57 00:04:07.199 --> 00:04:11.719 aunt died of calling cancer and her sister had calling cancer. 58 00:04:11.719 --> 00:04:13.599 Oldest sister had calling cancer. 59 00:04:14.080 --> 00:04:17.800 Now did they have all of the files in history? 60 00:04:18.079 --> 00:04:20.560 Our history? We gave it to him when we went there, 61 00:04:22.120 --> 00:04:28.560 but they never mentioned cancer. They just actually they did 62 00:04:28.959 --> 00:04:35.199 dinecological exam, X ray and blood test, and they did 63 00:04:35.199 --> 00:04:37.639 it over and over and over and over at the 64 00:04:37.720 --> 00:04:39.319 many months we were there, what. 65 00:04:39.319 --> 00:04:42.600 Were the symptoms that were plaguing. 66 00:04:42.319 --> 00:04:46.839 Her weakness and getting weaker? And after three weeks of 67 00:04:46.879 --> 00:04:50.560 putting us through three tests, they told us to go 68 00:04:50.600 --> 00:04:54.639 away for a month because they said they weren't finding anything. 69 00:04:55.000 --> 00:04:57.560 So we came back after a month and they said, oh, 70 00:04:57.639 --> 00:05:01.680 we think it's MS. So it wasn't until she came 71 00:05:01.759 --> 00:05:04.879 down with a domino pain. After ten days of a 72 00:05:04.959 --> 00:05:07.879 dominal pain, they said, well, we think you'd better take 73 00:05:07.879 --> 00:05:12.360 her to er. We think she's having appendicize attack. And 74 00:05:12.480 --> 00:05:16.079 after twenty hours an er they did finally did a 75 00:05:16.120 --> 00:05:19.639 cat scan and said there was a mask down there, 76 00:05:21.560 --> 00:05:23.920 and they said it was too late for them to 77 00:05:23.959 --> 00:05:28.680 do anything. They said it spread through her liver, through 78 00:05:28.800 --> 00:05:33.079 her abdomen, through the abnomen law, and through both the rovaries. 79 00:05:34.079 --> 00:05:37.759 Now, is there anyone any of the doctors involved saying 80 00:05:38.000 --> 00:05:40.519 and doctors tend not to want to say these things, 81 00:05:40.560 --> 00:05:44.720 but is or any of them saying that if you 82 00:05:44.879 --> 00:05:47.120 had that extra month or those couple of weeks, that 83 00:05:47.199 --> 00:05:51.639 it would have been different, because from what you're telling me, 84 00:05:51.720 --> 00:05:53.879 it sounds like it wouldn't have made a difference. 85 00:05:54.639 --> 00:06:01.279 Well, see, we see her oldest sister. Four years ago, 86 00:06:01.480 --> 00:06:05.319 she had a dominal pain. Her husband took her to 87 00:06:05.360 --> 00:06:10.240 the hospital sixty miles away, was the nearest town. They 88 00:06:10.279 --> 00:06:13.839 did a cat scan the same day. A few days 89 00:06:13.879 --> 00:06:16.680 later they did the operation. We removed the section of 90 00:06:16.720 --> 00:06:20.639 the calton where the cancer was in and she's been fine. 91 00:06:21.120 --> 00:06:24.000 Hmm. That's rough. That's rough to hear. 92 00:06:24.120 --> 00:06:27.040 And that's the oldest sister, My wife was the baby 93 00:06:27.040 --> 00:06:27.680 of the family. 94 00:06:28.160 --> 00:06:30.720 Well, Scott, I will say this that this is not, 95 00:06:30.920 --> 00:06:33.279 you know, obviously not a legal show, and that's not 96 00:06:33.360 --> 00:06:36.040 what we do here. This is a moral show. And 97 00:06:36.920 --> 00:06:39.279 when it comes to being in situations in the way 98 00:06:39.319 --> 00:06:42.319 you described that situation, sounds like there were some balls 99 00:06:42.319 --> 00:06:45.519 that were certainly dropped, and I think it's legitimate if 100 00:06:45.560 --> 00:06:50.040 you want to pursue a legal action and find out 101 00:06:50.040 --> 00:06:54.199 if maybe there is a case there, but none of 102 00:06:54.199 --> 00:06:57.120 that brings your wife back. The only hope that you 103 00:06:57.240 --> 00:07:02.279 have in cases like this is again to punish financially 104 00:07:02.480 --> 00:07:04.800 those involved and put a mark on the record so 105 00:07:04.879 --> 00:07:09.040 that others may be protected in the future. That is 106 00:07:09.079 --> 00:07:13.759 your goal, not you know, receiving large sums of money, 107 00:07:14.000 --> 00:07:18.160 not getting your wife back. These things should you know 108 00:07:18.839 --> 00:07:20.600 your wife's not going to come back, and the money 109 00:07:20.639 --> 00:07:23.680 should not be of great importance. What should be importance 110 00:07:23.879 --> 00:07:27.199 is what is right, and fighting for what is right 111 00:07:27.519 --> 00:07:30.920 is a difficult thing at times. A lot of times 112 00:07:31.199 --> 00:07:35.240 it gets tied in with other agendas and gets confused 113 00:07:35.920 --> 00:07:38.439 and twisted, and really you have to stand strong on 114 00:07:38.480 --> 00:07:42.920 what you believe. It's a horrible story, Scott, and I'm 115 00:07:42.920 --> 00:07:47.560 sorry for your loss. But if there was some negligence 116 00:07:47.600 --> 00:07:51.879 there on behalf of the medical facility in which you 117 00:07:52.000 --> 00:07:56.040 chose to take her, you might want to follow that up. 118 00:07:57.600 --> 00:08:01.240 But litigation, and you know the lawsuits that tend to 119 00:08:01.279 --> 00:08:04.720 fly back and forth freely in the United States, really 120 00:08:04.759 --> 00:08:07.040 should be the last resort and should be used as 121 00:08:07.120 --> 00:08:10.839 defense of your fellow human beings. That you're doing it 122 00:08:11.160 --> 00:08:15.040 to help protect other people from something that you see 123 00:08:15.120 --> 00:08:20.240 to be unjust and potentially a huge problem, even life threatening, 124 00:08:21.959 --> 00:08:24.319 and that should be the goal. And if that's the goal, 125 00:08:24.480 --> 00:08:28.959 then God will bless that. If it's revenge, oh, if 126 00:08:29.040 --> 00:08:32.720 it's for money, if it's any of these things that's 127 00:08:32.759 --> 00:08:36.320 not of God. It's not productive and it helps no one. 128 00:08:37.879 --> 00:08:43.159 This show focuses on right and wrong, that which is just, 129 00:08:45.000 --> 00:08:48.440 and sometimes that ties into law or medicine or whatever. 130 00:08:48.799 --> 00:08:52.919 But really it's about doing what you know to be right. 131 00:08:54.440 --> 00:08:59.639 And the scripture is that guidepost to take you through 132 00:08:59.639 --> 00:09:01.759 those things. Does that mean that that it has every 133 00:09:01.759 --> 00:09:04.440 single scenario you could possibly imagine and you're going to 134 00:09:04.480 --> 00:09:06.320 find them all in there with a simple answer and 135 00:09:06.440 --> 00:09:09.879 says do this when this happens. No, it's not that 136 00:09:09.960 --> 00:09:14.000 kind of book. But you are called to do that 137 00:09:14.080 --> 00:09:17.279 which is righteous and just in all things, and that's 138 00:09:17.320 --> 00:09:22.600 not always easy. Now, that doesn't mean that everything that 139 00:09:22.840 --> 00:09:26.519 happens to you, that feels bad, or every ugly thing 140 00:09:26.559 --> 00:09:29.039 you go through, that there's going to be a clear 141 00:09:29.120 --> 00:09:34.120 way or a clear enemy or a problem that can 142 00:09:34.159 --> 00:09:38.960 be solved. That will be part of your growth as well. 143 00:09:39.039 --> 00:09:40.559 There'll be a time where you have to look at 144 00:09:40.559 --> 00:09:44.159 a situation and go okay, there. It isn't as easy 145 00:09:44.200 --> 00:09:48.320 as you know. There's a leak. Plug the leak. Sometimes 146 00:09:48.320 --> 00:09:51.399 you'll experience things that you have to grow through and 147 00:09:51.519 --> 00:09:56.240 learn about yourself and and some of them could be 148 00:09:56.440 --> 00:10:01.879 incredibly weighty. There are p people that are intentionally trying 149 00:10:01.879 --> 00:10:05.240 to harm you in life that you need to defend 150 00:10:05.240 --> 00:10:07.480 yourself against. And there's people that will make mistakes in 151 00:10:07.480 --> 00:10:12.519 your life and they will affect you. And I know 152 00:10:12.559 --> 00:10:16.840 it's gotten to a place on this planet where everybody 153 00:10:16.919 --> 00:10:23.720 is so quick to point fingers. It becomes the easy 154 00:10:24.240 --> 00:10:29.200 response and the natural reaction for all things problematic, right, 155 00:10:30.200 --> 00:10:34.559 just blame someone else. And although I don't want you 156 00:10:34.639 --> 00:10:37.639 to get into that mindset, there are times where you 157 00:10:37.919 --> 00:10:42.039 need to stand up for something and say this is 158 00:10:42.080 --> 00:10:45.240 an injustice or something wrong has been done, And I 159 00:10:45.240 --> 00:10:47.440 don't want you to get to a state of being 160 00:10:47.519 --> 00:10:52.639 complacent where you just kind of brush it off. And 161 00:10:52.679 --> 00:10:55.960 I know that the world continues to push on you 162 00:10:56.240 --> 00:10:58.440 that it's silly to stand up for certain things, or 163 00:10:58.759 --> 00:11:01.600 oh that's so petty, or that's but if something's wrong 164 00:11:02.639 --> 00:11:05.039 or somebody has done something wrong to you in a 165 00:11:05.600 --> 00:11:08.960 small way, it's okay to correct them. And there will 166 00:11:09.039 --> 00:11:13.440 be times where someone does something that has major consequences 167 00:11:13.480 --> 00:11:16.159 that you may have to stand up for. The key 168 00:11:16.279 --> 00:11:19.600 is to use your discernment to have the ability to 169 00:11:19.720 --> 00:11:27.320 make judgment calls to see which situation is which. That 170 00:11:27.360 --> 00:11:31.120 you're not always so happy just ready to jump onto 171 00:11:31.279 --> 00:11:36.679 the litigation bandwagon with everybody else, but it is a 172 00:11:37.039 --> 00:11:44.919 legitimate tool of defense, and I think that you can have, 173 00:11:45.159 --> 00:11:47.879 you know, one or two directions to go in. There 174 00:11:47.879 --> 00:11:51.679 are many Christians that are so passive that they think, well, 175 00:11:51.759 --> 00:11:54.960 you know, I'll just pray for them, but there's practical 176 00:11:55.000 --> 00:11:57.399 things you need to do. And then there's Christians that 177 00:11:57.440 --> 00:12:00.519 are trying to shove righteousness down everybody's throat, that everybody's 178 00:12:00.559 --> 00:12:04.200 wrong and constantly correcting them, and that can be equally 179 00:12:04.440 --> 00:12:12.320 a problem. Maria, Welcome to the Jesus Christ Show. 180 00:12:13.120 --> 00:12:21.120 Hi, Jesus, Jesus. I left my husband after thirteen years. 181 00:12:19.879 --> 00:12:23.879 Some abuse, what kind of abuse. 182 00:12:25.759 --> 00:12:32.440 Bullying and intimidating and pushing me, and I just didn't 183 00:12:32.440 --> 00:12:34.679 do anything about it. I was just quiet about it 184 00:12:34.720 --> 00:12:38.639 and didn't want to aggravate the situation and thinking that 185 00:12:38.679 --> 00:12:40.639 it was my fault. And maybe if I didn't do this, 186 00:12:40.799 --> 00:12:42.279 or if I didn't do this, or if I didn't 187 00:12:42.279 --> 00:12:47.519 do this, but nothing, really I have come to find 188 00:12:47.559 --> 00:12:47.960 out if. 189 00:12:48.360 --> 00:12:49.759 He didn't beat you or anything. 190 00:12:49.799 --> 00:12:52.039 Correct, he didn't get to that point. 191 00:12:52.120 --> 00:12:54.000 Okay, good you didn't let him get to that point. 192 00:12:54.039 --> 00:12:58.200 Good for you. But there was there was an escalation 193 00:12:59.279 --> 00:13:01.320 of his adam tutor anger towards you. 194 00:13:02.039 --> 00:13:04.159 Yes, three and a half years ago I told him 195 00:13:04.159 --> 00:13:06.879 that that I was going to lead him right and 196 00:13:06.919 --> 00:13:09.320 then he and then he said because of the same thing. 197 00:13:09.320 --> 00:13:11.000 And then he said, no, I'm going to straighten up. 198 00:13:11.000 --> 00:13:13.960 You'll see, just give me another opportunity. So after three 199 00:13:13.960 --> 00:13:16.600 and a half years went by and he went ahead 200 00:13:16.600 --> 00:13:24.039 and became enraged again, and this time I almost fell 201 00:13:24.120 --> 00:13:28.039 down the stairs. So I said, no, I'm not going 202 00:13:28.120 --> 00:13:32.159 to continue this. My son had gone to college at 203 00:13:32.159 --> 00:13:35.799 that time, and I said to myself, you know, there's 204 00:13:35.879 --> 00:13:38.080 there's no reason. Now. I thought it was, you know, 205 00:13:38.159 --> 00:13:41.320 my son and whatever, problems of growing up. 206 00:13:41.480 --> 00:13:45.559 And it's it's very easy to make excuses or justify 207 00:13:45.639 --> 00:13:50.440 when someone's horrible like that. But but really all you're 208 00:13:50.480 --> 00:13:54.039 doing is making excuses and justifying being in a horrible situation. 209 00:13:54.919 --> 00:13:57.720 Yes, and I've come to find that out because after 210 00:13:57.759 --> 00:14:01.039 that I he started pursuing me after I left him, 211 00:14:01.039 --> 00:14:04.440 and all change and all change and the change that 212 00:14:04.519 --> 00:14:07.559 has occurred in him. He's gone to wanger management. He 213 00:14:07.600 --> 00:14:08.679 went to a therapist. 214 00:14:09.000 --> 00:14:13.960 Okay, so he is making legitimate strides towards bettering himself. 215 00:14:14.200 --> 00:14:15.200 Yes, on his own. 216 00:14:15.320 --> 00:14:17.039 That was going to be my next question if he 217 00:14:17.200 --> 00:14:19.600 was doing therapy. Now, did you guys do therapy together 218 00:14:19.639 --> 00:14:19.919 at all? 219 00:14:20.399 --> 00:14:24.480 No, we haven't done merphy together at all. And on 220 00:14:25.200 --> 00:14:27.679 his own. We did go ahead and start going to church, 221 00:14:27.799 --> 00:14:30.159 something that I had been begging him to do for 222 00:14:30.200 --> 00:14:33.159 those thirteen years, but on his own. He did it 223 00:14:33.200 --> 00:14:35.799 on his own contacts to the priest. So we are 224 00:14:35.840 --> 00:14:41.440 back at church now, we're going every Sunday, and Jesus, 225 00:14:40.919 --> 00:14:45.600 I still see bits of him, of the old him. 226 00:14:45.759 --> 00:14:53.559 I still see bits of him, and I'm still in thelapy, 227 00:14:54.440 --> 00:14:59.000 but I would like to know. I'm scared of going 228 00:14:59.080 --> 00:15:03.639 back and it happening again. So what do I need 229 00:15:03.679 --> 00:15:07.720 to do. I've asked you to send many people you 230 00:15:07.759 --> 00:15:14.360 know for guidance, and paid about it. But now I 231 00:15:14.360 --> 00:15:16.039 don't know if I should go back or when to 232 00:15:16.120 --> 00:15:16.559 go back. 233 00:15:16.600 --> 00:15:19.919 And were there were there signs of this Maria prior 234 00:15:19.960 --> 00:15:20.480 to marrying. 235 00:15:22.200 --> 00:15:25.320 I think there was? Okay, I think there was? 236 00:15:26.200 --> 00:15:28.200 And where do they stem from it? Does he drink 237 00:15:28.519 --> 00:15:32.080 or he doesn't use any substances or anything? 238 00:15:32.440 --> 00:15:37.000 No, he doesn't drink. It seems to be anger from childhood. 239 00:15:37.240 --> 00:15:39.279 Okay, So what triggers it? When does it seem to 240 00:15:39.639 --> 00:15:41.320 pop up and rear its ugly head? 241 00:15:42.039 --> 00:15:44.919 When when I stand up to him and when I say, no, 242 00:15:45.159 --> 00:15:47.360 this is not the way it's going to be. You know, 243 00:15:47.480 --> 00:15:49.799 this is the way now that you will need to 244 00:15:49.840 --> 00:15:53.120 talk to me. You know you will need to talk 245 00:15:53.159 --> 00:15:54.919 to me the way that I speak to you. And 246 00:15:55.639 --> 00:15:58.159 during this time I think I've had I have more 247 00:15:58.200 --> 00:16:01.919 self confidence now, so he is more aware of that. 248 00:16:03.039 --> 00:16:07.639 But and so this, but and so that exacerbates it 249 00:16:07.679 --> 00:16:10.600 and makes it worse, or because he must have been 250 00:16:10.600 --> 00:16:12.720 doing it before you stood up to him, Otherwise you 251 00:16:12.720 --> 00:16:14.360 wouldn't have anything to stand up to him for. 252 00:16:15.000 --> 00:16:19.559 So it seems that when he wants his will done, 253 00:16:19.679 --> 00:16:21.600 for example, if he says no, this is not going 254 00:16:21.639 --> 00:16:23.720 to happen, and if I challenge him. 255 00:16:23.600 --> 00:16:26.120 On it, what would be what would be an occasion 256 00:16:26.159 --> 00:16:27.759 of that? What would be something that he would say, 257 00:16:27.759 --> 00:16:29.360 I put my foot down and don't want you to 258 00:16:29.399 --> 00:16:29.840 do it. 259 00:16:31.679 --> 00:16:36.080 When I wanted to bring my forty year old not 260 00:16:36.240 --> 00:16:40.840 forty year old. Oh, okay, perfect example. My son wants 261 00:16:40.879 --> 00:16:44.039 to come home from college and he says no, he 262 00:16:44.039 --> 00:16:46.159 should be staying in college. And I said, well, but 263 00:16:46.279 --> 00:16:48.000 this is his first week and he wants to come 264 00:16:48.039 --> 00:16:50.399 home for this weekend. He goes, no, you will not 265 00:16:50.519 --> 00:16:53.279 be picking him up today, and I said, yes, I 266 00:16:53.320 --> 00:16:53.720 have to work. 267 00:16:54.399 --> 00:16:56.559 Why why do you think he doesn't want you to? 268 00:17:03.120 --> 00:17:07.279 Well that that first time he told me, Oh, he 269 00:17:07.440 --> 00:17:11.599 values his privacy okay, and he wants his privacy. He 270 00:17:11.640 --> 00:17:14.799 doesn't want to this is not his son. 271 00:17:15.279 --> 00:17:17.839 Okay, Then why don't you Why don't you respect that 272 00:17:17.920 --> 00:17:21.960 your your son's an adult? Why don't you respect your 273 00:17:22.039 --> 00:17:23.240 husband's household. 274 00:17:27.240 --> 00:17:30.240 Mh is this I think my my friend needed me? 275 00:17:31.480 --> 00:17:36.920 Okay? And why in what context did your son need you? 276 00:17:37.000 --> 00:17:38.119 Does he need a place to live? 277 00:17:40.160 --> 00:17:43.279 No, he just wanted to come down because it was 278 00:17:43.279 --> 00:17:47.319 something new to him. It was something new. But after 279 00:17:47.519 --> 00:17:48.880 four or five months I've gone by. 280 00:17:49.079 --> 00:17:50.759 I mean, how many children do you have? 281 00:17:51.440 --> 00:17:51.839 Just one? 282 00:17:52.279 --> 00:17:55.680 And your relationship with him is you're close? Obviously? 283 00:17:56.200 --> 00:17:56.599 Yes? 284 00:17:56.759 --> 00:17:58.920 And did did he grow up in the house with 285 00:17:59.079 --> 00:18:01.200 your with your husband not his father? 286 00:18:01.839 --> 00:18:02.039 Yes? 287 00:18:02.440 --> 00:18:07.640 Okay, so he grew up with you. Guys, Traditionally, men, 288 00:18:07.759 --> 00:18:10.680 whether biologically the father or not or going to have 289 00:18:10.720 --> 00:18:16.680 different feelings about children coming back than women. If women 290 00:18:16.720 --> 00:18:18.960 had it their way, most of the time, children wouldn't 291 00:18:18.960 --> 00:18:22.359 grow up at all. They want to keep them at home. 292 00:18:22.480 --> 00:18:25.960 Women are nurturers, and when you have the desire to 293 00:18:26.119 --> 00:18:30.680 nurture your child, that's going to be forever. That's not 294 00:18:30.759 --> 00:18:36.079 going to stop. And women, oftentimes not all the time, 295 00:18:36.160 --> 00:18:42.640 oftentimes define themselves based on the family relations and their children, 296 00:18:42.799 --> 00:18:45.240 whereas a man tends to define himself on his job 297 00:18:46.279 --> 00:18:48.240 by his job. And that's why men tend to go 298 00:18:48.279 --> 00:18:53.359 into depression or frustration when they're when they go through 299 00:18:54.240 --> 00:18:57.279 leaving work and finally retiring, whereas women tend to go 300 00:18:57.319 --> 00:19:01.720 through it when they're going through men or the children 301 00:19:01.720 --> 00:19:04.279 are leaving and they don't have that connection with the 302 00:19:04.319 --> 00:19:06.519 children in the same way, in the same sense. So 303 00:19:06.759 --> 00:19:09.279 I understand that there's there's some conflicting things that are 304 00:19:09.279 --> 00:19:13.680 going on in the home, But this is this is 305 00:19:13.960 --> 00:19:17.200 not a man who's saying, you know, it bugs me 306 00:19:17.279 --> 00:19:20.759 when you know you make my food this way and 307 00:19:21.119 --> 00:19:23.440 or you know, I don't like when you put my 308 00:19:23.839 --> 00:19:26.160 drink in this glass or that glass. This is somebody 309 00:19:26.200 --> 00:19:29.160 who's saying, hey, this is my home too, and you're 310 00:19:29.160 --> 00:19:33.599 not respecting it. People yell for different reasons, Maria, But 311 00:19:33.720 --> 00:19:35.400 most of the time they can, you know, they can 312 00:19:35.440 --> 00:19:39.079 have mental issues, they cannot care about what other people 313 00:19:39.480 --> 00:19:42.720 have to say. But oftentimes people yell because they feel 314 00:19:42.720 --> 00:19:50.240 they're not being heard and that men are are not 315 00:19:50.240 --> 00:19:54.359 not great with explaining their emotions. Men from the men 316 00:19:54.400 --> 00:19:57.119 from the moment they're born, are taught that things can 317 00:19:57.279 --> 00:20:01.599 escalate to a physical conflict very quickly, not the same 318 00:20:01.640 --> 00:20:04.759 for women. Women tend to do different things to fight 319 00:20:04.839 --> 00:20:08.720 each other than men do. So it's not that men 320 00:20:08.880 --> 00:20:12.279 like to fight. Men are very physical that they love physically, 321 00:20:13.200 --> 00:20:17.839 they hate physically, they argue physically, they do everything physically, 322 00:20:18.039 --> 00:20:20.880 and that can be incredibly intimidating to a woman. And 323 00:20:20.920 --> 00:20:24.680 you should never ever stand for being put in a 324 00:20:24.720 --> 00:20:26.839 place of intimidation where you don't feel secure in your 325 00:20:26.839 --> 00:20:29.200 own home. However, what I do want you to hear 326 00:20:29.839 --> 00:20:33.079 and that some people do not okay. So first, clearly, 327 00:20:33.519 --> 00:20:36.920 if there is real abuse going on, physical or otherwise, 328 00:20:36.960 --> 00:20:41.599 if they emotional abuse, then absolutely you need to defend 329 00:20:41.640 --> 00:20:46.519 yourself from that and leave that situation. What I want 330 00:20:46.559 --> 00:20:48.839 to find out, and unfortunately, the length of time that 331 00:20:48.880 --> 00:20:52.680 we have during the program and the focus that we 332 00:20:52.720 --> 00:20:54.559 have here is you can't always get these things out. 333 00:20:54.599 --> 00:20:57.079 I'm hearing one side, not his, and all those things, 334 00:20:57.240 --> 00:20:59.160 and it's very easy to go, well, the man's bad. 335 00:21:00.720 --> 00:21:02.359 I want you to look at a couple of things 336 00:21:02.440 --> 00:21:05.759 when these occasions come up. Are maybe you doing the 337 00:21:05.759 --> 00:21:08.319 thing that you're saying he's doing. Are you demanding that 338 00:21:08.400 --> 00:21:10.240 something is going to happen in that house? It's his 339 00:21:10.319 --> 00:21:13.599 household too now, Effectively, the best way to do it 340 00:21:13.640 --> 00:21:16.000 is that you both are partners and have a say 341 00:21:16.039 --> 00:21:20.079 in what goes on. And if he's not expressing it properly. 342 00:21:20.079 --> 00:21:24.039 If he's just putting his foot down and trying to intimidate, 343 00:21:24.079 --> 00:21:26.680 it's because he feels possibly that he doesn't have a 344 00:21:26.759 --> 00:21:31.599 voice in the situation. So communication is going to be 345 00:21:31.599 --> 00:21:33.039 a key here. And I think it's great that he's 346 00:21:33.079 --> 00:21:37.160 going to therapy and having another party come in and 347 00:21:37.200 --> 00:21:40.799 look at what's going on. But I think a great 348 00:21:40.839 --> 00:21:42.759 thing would be for the two of you to go 349 00:21:42.839 --> 00:21:46.880 into therapy together. If you have a pastor that does it, 350 00:21:47.079 --> 00:21:50.480 a couple's therapy would be great. If not, you can 351 00:21:50.519 --> 00:21:53.359 find some. You can even find Christian based ones, which 352 00:21:53.400 --> 00:21:56.680 of course I would prefer, but you can find these 353 00:21:57.960 --> 00:22:01.559 a place where you can voice what you're expressing to 354 00:22:01.599 --> 00:22:04.799 me and saying, listen, I miss my son, and men, 355 00:22:04.880 --> 00:22:09.279 as your son grows up, that's not your son anymore, 356 00:22:09.279 --> 00:22:13.279 that's another man in the house. That's another potential alpha 357 00:22:13.319 --> 00:22:17.680 dog that the man is going to want to battle 358 00:22:17.720 --> 00:22:20.559 with on his own turf. And as men get older, 359 00:22:20.599 --> 00:22:23.920 they want their territory, they want their place. They worked 360 00:22:23.920 --> 00:22:26.519 for it, just does women have, but they've worked for 361 00:22:26.559 --> 00:22:28.480 it and they want This is my home, and I 362 00:22:28.519 --> 00:22:30.400 want to be in my home, and I don't want 363 00:22:30.480 --> 00:22:32.200 kids coming back, and I don't want to go back 364 00:22:32.240 --> 00:22:35.720 to being We've done that already. So there's a lot, 365 00:22:36.000 --> 00:22:39.160 a lot of variables in this that are different than 366 00:22:39.240 --> 00:22:43.559 just cut and dry. Leave only you know whether you 367 00:22:43.599 --> 00:22:45.799 don't feel safe or not. And if you don't feel safe, 368 00:22:46.039 --> 00:22:54.400 absolutely positively no asterisks. Leave. But if you're saying, well, 369 00:22:54.440 --> 00:22:57.079 sort of this and sort of that, then you need 370 00:22:57.119 --> 00:23:00.599 to have clarification find out why this is because always 371 00:23:00.640 --> 00:23:03.759 my desire is going to be reconcile with those that 372 00:23:03.880 --> 00:23:06.839 have the heart and mind for reconciliation, not just to 373 00:23:06.839 --> 00:23:15.240 do it, to do it justin Yah, welcome to the 374 00:23:15.359 --> 00:23:19.839 Jesus Christ Show. Thanks, you are very welcome. How can 375 00:23:19.880 --> 00:23:20.279 I help you? 376 00:23:21.200 --> 00:23:26.839 Yeah, I just wondering about the term inerrancy of scripture. 377 00:23:27.079 --> 00:23:32.039 Is the Bible? Does it have errors? Are there contradictions? 378 00:23:32.119 --> 00:23:34.920 What does that mean when people say an error? Is 379 00:23:34.920 --> 00:23:36.960 it the copies or is it the original? 380 00:23:37.160 --> 00:23:39.680 It would be the originals always, always is going to 381 00:23:39.720 --> 00:23:46.240 deal with in its original form. That essentially that this 382 00:23:46.279 --> 00:23:49.119 particular doctrine of inerrancy really is focusing on the fact 383 00:23:49.920 --> 00:23:55.799 that in everything it teaches it's free of error. So 384 00:23:56.200 --> 00:23:58.440 there are you know, there's different ways to look at 385 00:23:58.440 --> 00:24:02.599 this one. When you were talking about contradictions, they're alleged 386 00:24:02.599 --> 00:24:05.640 contradictions or problems. They have to be alleged. The only 387 00:24:05.799 --> 00:24:10.400 real contradiction is something that tries to say it's the 388 00:24:10.400 --> 00:24:12.279 same way in the same sense at the same time 389 00:24:12.480 --> 00:24:14.720 and not the same way in the same sense at 390 00:24:14.759 --> 00:24:17.559 the same time. But that doesn't mean there can't be 391 00:24:17.680 --> 00:24:20.519 things that seem to be a contradiction that really aren't 392 00:24:20.799 --> 00:24:25.240 that need more information. So an example of that is 393 00:24:27.519 --> 00:24:30.440 justin you have two parents, are they from the same 394 00:24:30.480 --> 00:24:32.799 background or are they from different backgrounds? 395 00:24:33.039 --> 00:24:36.799 Ethnically pretty much the same background. 396 00:24:36.880 --> 00:24:39.480 Okay, well there are people that have you know, one 397 00:24:39.559 --> 00:24:42.079 parent comes from this background, the other parent comes from 398 00:24:42.079 --> 00:24:47.000 that background. My producer, Neil, his mother is from an 399 00:24:47.039 --> 00:24:51.759 Irish English Scottish background and his father's from a Spanish 400 00:24:51.799 --> 00:24:56.359 and Mexican background. So if Neil was at a cocktail 401 00:24:56.400 --> 00:25:01.440