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<v Speaker 1>The worst April Fool's Day joke. And when I say worst,

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<v Speaker 1>it means I mean it was really good and clever,

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<v Speaker 1>but it backfired hugely. Probably twenty twenty five years ago,

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<v Speaker 1>we had an idea to do commercials on the radio

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<v Speaker 1>that were fake, called Pets bymail dot com. And this

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<v Speaker 1>is when the Internet was blown up and everything was

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<v Speaker 1>like on the internet and like, you know whatever, So

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<v Speaker 1>it was still kind of a new shiny toy. So

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<v Speaker 1>we said, okay, let's make this funny commercial that's fake. Hey,

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<v Speaker 1>you want a new pet. All you gotta do is

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<v Speaker 1>go on our website pets bymail dot com. We got

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<v Speaker 1>everything from bearded dragons to poodles to little kitty cats

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<v Speaker 1>to parakeets. Pick out your pet. We will deliver your

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<v Speaker 1>pet alive to you within forty eight hours. If by

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<v Speaker 1>any chance, the pet doesn't arrive alive, simply return the

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<v Speaker 1>carcass for a full refund.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh geez.

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<v Speaker 1>And we use the word carcass. Yeah, And then people

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<v Speaker 1>were like, what do you guys do? What is this

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<v Speaker 1>horrible thing? And then so on April Fool's Day. The

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<v Speaker 1>commercials ran for like four or five days before on

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<v Speaker 1>April Fool's day the website went live pets bymail dot

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<v Speaker 1>com and then it said April fool Yeah, but it

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<v Speaker 1>backfired because people were just furious that we would do

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<v Speaker 1>something like that, even when we didn't. So it spread

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<v Speaker 1>all over the country from all of these pet groups.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm gonna say, didn't PETA get involved or.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't think so, but I remember getting because what

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<v Speaker 1>people could do is they could look up the email

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<v Speaker 1>address of the person who founded or branded or whatever

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<v Speaker 1>the website. That was me, and also my home address

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<v Speaker 1>in chan Hassen, which is not my home anymore. We've

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<v Speaker 1>moved a couple of times since then, and so people

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<v Speaker 1>were writing from all over the country, this is despicable,

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<v Speaker 1>this is detestable, this is sick. And then I would

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<v Speaker 1>say it's a joke. And what I've noticed is that

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<v Speaker 1>some people when they get fooled, they don't like it,

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<v Speaker 1>Like with the waitress thing that I did five or

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<v Speaker 1>six or eight years ago, where I mouthed off to

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<v Speaker 1>the waitress. Once people found out that it was a joke,

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<v Speaker 1>they didn't like the fact that they got fooled. So

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<v Speaker 1>they were still angry and said, you don't joke about that,

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<v Speaker 1>that's not funny. Even some of the media said, Dave

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<v Speaker 1>Ryan doesn't know what a joke is.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh, And it was like, no, bitch, it's because you

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<v Speaker 1>got fooled and you didn't like it. With the pets thing,

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<v Speaker 1>you could definitely argue that you don't joke about things

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<v Speaker 1>like that, but people definitely were pissed.

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<v Speaker 4>It was like, in your defense, a very different time

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<v Speaker 4>back then, because now we're thinking until like societal standard

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<v Speaker 4>at this point in life, and I just feel like

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<v Speaker 4>it was a different time back then.

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<v Speaker 2>No, it was.

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<v Speaker 1>I mean there was a different brand or standard for humor,

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<v Speaker 1>and it was definitely pushing the envelope. There's no question. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>there's a knock at my door. Oh, I opened the door.

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<v Speaker 1>There's a Carver County Sheriff deputy thing gosh, because he

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<v Speaker 1>had been told the Sheriff's apartment had been alerted to

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<v Speaker 1>the fact that there was a puppy mill being run

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<v Speaker 1>out of this house in Chanhassen.

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<v Speaker 3>Gosh.

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<v Speaker 1>And I said, it's a joke. It's an April Fool's joke.

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<v Speaker 1>It's gotten out of hand, it's blown way up. He's like, well,

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<v Speaker 1>you need to take the website down. And I'm like

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<v Speaker 1>don't worry. We already did, but it doesn't matter. People

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<v Speaker 1>are still up in arms about the whole thing. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>pets bymail dot com. And you're right, we would never

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<v Speaker 1>do anything like that. No, not anymore, because you know,

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<v Speaker 1>it's just a different sort of world. We did one

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<v Speaker 1>maybe ten ishu years ago. Minnesota Parks and Lakes Department,

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<v Speaker 1>which there isn't one, had a website that we took

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<v Speaker 1>out that said no motorcraft allowed on Lake Minnetonka this

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<v Speaker 1>summer good and people were freaked out because that's what

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<v Speaker 1>people look forward to, their boats and jet skis out

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<v Speaker 1>on Lake Minnetonka. Well, no motorized watercraft on Lake Minnetaka

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<v Speaker 1>according to Minnesota Trails and Lakes.

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<v Speaker 3>Or whatever it was, right, something that doesn't exist.

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<v Speaker 1>And people totally bought that one. That was a little

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<v Speaker 1>bit more harmless, yeah, because nobody went to you know,

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<v Speaker 1>nobody like protested or anything like that. We did another

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<v Speaker 1>one one time, and this is one of my favorites,

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<v Speaker 1>where we said we're gonna fly a helicopter over a

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<v Speaker 1>park in Crystal or wherever it was and drop fifty

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<v Speaker 1>dollar bills. This morning, seven o'clock be in this park

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<v Speaker 1>in crystal. The KDWB chopper is going to drop fifty

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<v Speaker 1>dollars bills. So this place was packed with people wanting

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<v Speaker 1>fifty dollar bills. The helicopter arrives and it starts dropping

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<v Speaker 1>fifty dollar bills fifty dollars invoices like a bill, like

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<v Speaker 1>you owe us fifty dollars. So it was a bill,

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<v Speaker 1>not cash.

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<v Speaker 3>H I don't think i've heard that one before.

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<v Speaker 2>That was a fun one.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh wow, you think's got a helicopter.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, wow, Well a friend of mine had a helicopter, okay,

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<v Speaker 1>and so we had use of a helicopter and we

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<v Speaker 1>did it a couple of time, a couple of different

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<v Speaker 1>things with it. People laughed at that one, and people

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<v Speaker 1>still remember that one and they laughed. But now you

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<v Speaker 1>got to figure somebody would say, like I sprained my

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<v Speaker 1>ankle running for the helicopter, and I deserve money.

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<v Speaker 3>I had to take work off.

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<v Speaker 1>Wow, So we don't do anything like that anymore. So

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<v Speaker 1>remember what we did last year?

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<v Speaker 2>You were not here?

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<v Speaker 3>I think I was like, no, I wasn't here here.

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<v Speaker 4>No.

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<v Speaker 1>We said that they open up a bowling alley.

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<v Speaker 3>Underneath our I heard it though, like on area, so you.

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<v Speaker 1>Could hear bowling pins crashing through the entire show, and

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<v Speaker 1>we're like, god, they install the built a bowling alley

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<v Speaker 1>underneath us and you can hear it. Yeah, And that

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<v Speaker 1>was harmless and innocuous because nobody's going to protest about

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<v Speaker 1>that one.

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<v Speaker 5>They have to be like harmless now or else people

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<v Speaker 5>get mad in general, Like in all all April Fool's jokes,

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<v Speaker 5>you can't like hurt anybody with it, right.

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<v Speaker 1>We were going to say one that the Vikings are

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<v Speaker 1>moving to Salt Lake City, and then we quickly ruled

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<v Speaker 1>that out because the Vikings are good clients of ours

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<v Speaker 1>and we didn't want to piss off the Vikings.

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<v Speaker 5>Yea.

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<v Speaker 1>So then we said, okay, well, let's put a cricket

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<v Speaker 1>sound like chirp, chirp, chirp, chirp all through the radio

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<v Speaker 1>station all morning and then wait for people to call

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<v Speaker 1>in and say, why do I hear a cricket? We're like,

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<v Speaker 1>what a cricket? And then we would say, oh, there's

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<v Speaker 1>a cricket in the transmitter, as if that would transmit

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<v Speaker 1>over the radio, and we just decided not to do

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<v Speaker 1>anything at all. Yeah, So that way we can't get

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<v Speaker 1>in any trouble.

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<v Speaker 3>We got pas, which is nice, well, not really.

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<v Speaker 1>An April Fool's joke, but you did pull one on

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<v Speaker 1>me that I actually think is really funny.

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<v Speaker 3>Thank you.

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<v Speaker 1>Bailey writes up these headlines and it says new law

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<v Speaker 1>requires Minnesotans to show ID to buy phallic foods, which

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<v Speaker 1>I thought was really funny, like you got to be

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<v Speaker 1>at least eighteen years old by a cucumber or a

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<v Speaker 1>hot dog.

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<v Speaker 5>Yeah, And people were texting in because they didn't catch you,

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<v Speaker 5>saying that it was a joke that I pulled on

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<v Speaker 5>you at the beginning, and so then people were.

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<v Speaker 3>Like, which costco is this? I can't believe you had

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<v Speaker 3>to show your ID so.

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<v Speaker 2>To buy hot dog?

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<v Speaker 3>Good bit. Could you ever do pranks on like your

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<v Speaker 3>parents or anything growing up?

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<v Speaker 4>Because the one that I did that every not every,

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<v Speaker 4>but a lot of teenage girls did was like you'd

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<v Speaker 4>put red food dye in the toilet and then you'd be.

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<v Speaker 2>Like, mom, oh my god, I got my pop you.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I did that one.

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<v Speaker 4>And then I think I've done the rubber band around

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<v Speaker 4>the hose on the sink.

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<v Speaker 2>Are you seriously.

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<v Speaker 5>I've not done I don't do pranks. I'm not like

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<v Speaker 5>a prankster type person I like, I do hate pranks.

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<v Speaker 5>I don't like being fooled in general. It hurts my feelings.

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<v Speaker 5>But the while I was in the bathroom, the State

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<v Speaker 5>Fair posted theirs and it's that like there's going to

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<v Speaker 5>be a universal payment system at the fair called pickle chips,

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<v Speaker 5>and they just had people like opening jars of pickles

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<v Speaker 5>and like paying with pickles.

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<v Speaker 2>That's funny.

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<v Speaker 5>And because it's funny, you know it's fake. It's just cute,

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<v Speaker 5>and I feel like that's what pranks have to be now,

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<v Speaker 5>are cute things.

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<v Speaker 4>The only one I saw was that the North Loop

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<v Speaker 4>Instagram posted that next to Couzi's, which is like a

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<v Speaker 4>staple of the North Loop, They're going to turn the

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<v Speaker 4>open parking lot into a pick ball courts and I

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<v Speaker 4>was like, fuck, yeah, I know it.

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<v Speaker 3>Was a bit, but I was like, God, it'd be

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<v Speaker 3>so cool.

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<v Speaker 2>Though.

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<v Speaker 1>When I was a kid, I grew up in Colorado

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<v Speaker 1>Springs and that's right at the foot of Pike's Peak.

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<v Speaker 1>And Pike's Peak is this big, you know what Pike's

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<v Speaker 1>Peak is. And the paper they published a picture they

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<v Speaker 1>photoshopped early primitive photoshop of Pike's Peak erupting. Oh, and

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<v Speaker 1>they said, oh my gosh. Yeah, you know, once every

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<v Speaker 1>hundred years or so, Pike's Peak erupts, and here is

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<v Speaker 1>Pike's Peak erupting. And everybody knew Pike's Peak is not

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<v Speaker 1>a volcano at all. But there were some people who

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<v Speaker 1>were really pissed because, like, we're new here, we didn't

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<v Speaker 1>realize that Pike's Peak is not a volcano. And that

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<v Speaker 1>scared my entire families. Like, eh, okay, but.

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<v Speaker 3>You could have just looked it up, right.

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<v Speaker 1>But where would you look it up back then in

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<v Speaker 1>the Incralia? Yeah, all right, emails, this is really interesting

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<v Speaker 1>and I've noticed this on Highway seven, Jennifer writes in PSA.

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<v Speaker 1>If you're driving on Highway seven west of the radio

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<v Speaker 1>station towards Minnetonka, there are cameras watching you, and they

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<v Speaker 1>are there are these things that are parked alongside of

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<v Speaker 1>the road, and there are things that hover over the

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<v Speaker 1>road on a on a like a little beam or whatever.

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<v Speaker 1>They are cameras watching if you're doing anything other than

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<v Speaker 1>keeping your eyes on the road. The local police department

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<v Speaker 1>tested this new AI technology using cameras that take a

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<v Speaker 1>picture of you and can see if your hands are

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<v Speaker 1>on your phone, eating a sandwich or anything else distracting

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<v Speaker 1>you from driving. In their testing data phase in February

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<v Speaker 1>ten thousand instances of distracted driving, the camera is alert

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<v Speaker 1>police within three seconds and then decide if a traffic

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<v Speaker 1>stop is necessary. So keep your eyes on the road

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<v Speaker 1>and stay safe, y'all.

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<v Speaker 2>Good to know.

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<v Speaker 4>Okay, guys, I have a question for you. Have you

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<v Speaker 4>ever heard of just like painting your countertops instead of

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<v Speaker 4>just getting new countertops?

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<v Speaker 2>No?

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<v Speaker 4>Never, Okay, So I'm trying to make my kitchen not

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<v Speaker 4>look like it's from the nineteen sixties. And I was

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<v Speaker 4>texting with Tina, and Tina has I mean, she used

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<v Speaker 4>to do like graphic design digital stuff for us here

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<v Speaker 4>at the radio station, so she's got a really good

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<v Speaker 4>eye for design, and so I was sending her pictures

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<v Speaker 4>of the kitchen and she's like, well, you should try this.

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<v Speaker 4>And basically, you paint your countertops and you can make

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<v Speaker 4>them look marbled. So you paint it like white, and

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<v Speaker 4>then you have this other I don't know, some kind

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<v Speaker 4>of paint that you kind of like draw lines in

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<v Speaker 4>it that look like branches or whatever, and you kind

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<v Speaker 4>of I don't know what the word is yeah or

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<v Speaker 4>something like that. Whatever you put like some kind of

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<v Speaker 4>coating on top and whatever, and it looks literally like

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<v Speaker 4>your countertops are brand new. So the kid for that's

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<v Speaker 4>like one hundred and sixty bucks versus brand new countertops

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<v Speaker 4>are going to set me back a few.

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<v Speaker 3>Thousand thousands, yeah, And I just I'm not going to

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<v Speaker 3>do that right now.

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<v Speaker 4>So I ordered the kit online and I think it

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<v Speaker 4>comes this weekend, and I think I'm going to attempt

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<v Speaker 4>to do it this weekend. Tina did offer to help me,

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<v Speaker 4>because she did help her friend do it once, so

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<v Speaker 4>I'm a little bit nervous. But if anyone listening has

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<v Speaker 4>done something like this and you have tips, I would

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<v Speaker 4>love to hear it, because I've never done a project

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<v Speaker 4>like this, And basically, if I fuck it up, that

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<v Speaker 4>means I am going to be spending like thousands of

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<v Speaker 4>dollars on.

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<v Speaker 5>New countertops, yeah, because then you have screwed it up, yeah,

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<v Speaker 5>past the point of just having crappy countertops to begin with.

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<v Speaker 4>But I'm kind of excited just because I like to

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<v Speaker 4>cook and bake and stuff, and I hate my kitchen

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<v Speaker 4>so much. It's literally like the vibe is so often

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<v Speaker 4>there and so I just I.

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<v Speaker 3>Want it to be nice.

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<v Speaker 1>Is it a kitchen from like, I mean, your house

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<v Speaker 1>is built probably in the fifties something like that.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, okay, it's like every Saint Louis Park house looks

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<v Speaker 4>very similar. I don't have an alley kitchen. Most Saint

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<v Speaker 4>Louis Park houses have like alley kitchens where it's just

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<v Speaker 4>like you walk in and there's countertops on your left

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<v Speaker 4>and right. Okay, mine's actually like a square shape. Okay,

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<v Speaker 4>but it's just the countertops are old. The cabinets are

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<v Speaker 4>so fucking old, and they look so.

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<v Speaker 2>The original I think, so they might be from the fifties.

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<v Speaker 4>Yeah, so I plan on probably doing something with the

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<v Speaker 4>cabinets as well, like painting those. But also that's another

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<v Speaker 4>thing that's so expensive, and I have a lot of

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<v Speaker 4>cabinets in my kitchen. Yeah, it would cost so much money.

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<v Speaker 4>So I think I'm gonna paint those and get new candles,

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<v Speaker 4>and hopefully soon enough my kitchen will look a lot

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<v Speaker 4>less like it's from the fifties or sixties.

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<v Speaker 1>It's funny how kitchens age so poorly. Our house is

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<v Speaker 1>built in like ninety six or something like that, and

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<v Speaker 1>the kitchen is very very dated. Our whole house is

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<v Speaker 1>dated looking. I mean it's you know, it was the

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<v Speaker 1>style back then. We have a jacuzzie tub. Those are

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<v Speaker 1>very outdated. Now nobody wants a jacuzie tub. They all

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<v Speaker 1>want a soaking tub. We've got brass door fixtures that

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<v Speaker 1>are a handle, not a knob, six panel doors, and

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<v Speaker 1>it's very dated. But you're right, Jenny, it's like to

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<v Speaker 1>bring it up to modernization. It's so expensive.

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<v Speaker 3>It is so expensive.

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<v Speaker 1>What is your count, what's the what's your material? What's

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<v Speaker 1>your countertop material? Is it stone? Is it isn't?

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<v Speaker 3>No, it's definitely not wood. It's not would either.

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<v Speaker 4>I just feel like it looks like some cheap countertop

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<v Speaker 4>you'd have in an apartment complex.

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<v Speaker 3>Like I don't know, it's.

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<v Speaker 2>Just is it for Micah? I mean, if you is it?

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<v Speaker 2>Is it good?

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<v Speaker 1>These things you're with little laminates of stuff over the top.

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<v Speaker 1>Is it laminated?

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<v Speaker 4>Maybe that's what I would define it as. Okay, but

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<v Speaker 4>it's it's very The design of it is ugly. It

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<v Speaker 4>doesn't look remotely modern whatsoever. So the point is I'm

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<v Speaker 4>gonna paint these bad boys, see how it goes, and

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<v Speaker 4>if I screwed up, I screwed up. The one thing

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<v Speaker 4>I didn't learn was that you do have to It

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<v Speaker 4>stains easily with this like paint stuff, so you do

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<v Speaker 4>have to make sure you're constantly like cleaning the countertops.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh, which is fine because that's.

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<v Speaker 4>Like one of my number one things I do do.

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<v Speaker 4>I'm always cleaning the countertops after like cooking and stuff,

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<v Speaker 4>So I don't think that'll be a problem.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, interesting, Well, you'll have to let us know how

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<v Speaker 2>that goes.

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<v Speaker 3>I pictures.

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<v Speaker 4>I'll come in Monday crying because I screwed up my kitchen,

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<v Speaker 4>or I'll be really excited.

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<v Speaker 1>Good luck, Jenny, I believe in you. Send your emails

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<v Speaker 1>in to Ryan's show at katwbeat dot com. We'd love

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<v Speaker 1>to get you on the next Minnesota.

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<v Speaker 2>Goodbye.