Speaker 1: You know what. I did enjoy this week's episode of
Dumb and Jerry, but I would suggest that you don't
listen to it on your lunch break. They've got a
story that put me right off me. Geez, sandwiches. I've
been up this chimney all day and I haven't eaten
anything since my breakfast. Four eggs, four sausages and mugga beans,
three eggs, black pudding and white pudding, mushrooms, tomatoes, and
I put to tea. I mean, you couldn't expect a
man to last all the way on just that, can you. Anyways,
I'll see there, Tom.
Speaker 2: How are you keeping buddy, I'll tell you how I
am tired.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm tired. And I tell you what I got,
a rude awakening. A rude awakening, you know when you're
We talked about your fitness and your strength last week,
just leaving you.
Speaker 2: Because of abandon me.
Speaker 1: Yeah, abandon you. I was up training the youngsters this
evening and there was a young lad, probably under sixteen,
was just joining in just to just to mess around,
and we were having at the end and I he
put a rasper. He was just poking the ball around
with the lads. Helping on, you know, puking it back
out stuff, and he put it. He put a rasper
past me of a slitter. Jerry that once upon a
time I may had the reactions to get at least
a hurry up in that direction. Yeah, ah man, this this,
this could have shaved off one side of my mustache
and I'd still be standing there.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and slid that pass cleanly through your skull like
like nothing.
Speaker 1: I Like, it was like it was in the net
and I was still looking at the lad. Do you
know what I mean? Like, yeah, it hit it hit
the net and ground and even a couple of the
women were at side, Go when do you stop that,
tim Like yep, sure.
Speaker 2: I wanted the young lad to have a denis on. Yeah.
Speaker 1: We'll blow it up there, lads, will we We'll call it.
We've got it a day. Tell you what it is
one of the realization.
Speaker 2: I'll tell you. I'll put it down to quicker, and
I'll put it down to age and weariness. Is the summer,
the heat and the humidity slowing me down and awful her.
Speaker 1: Maybe we'll yeah, I'll put that down Jerry. Yeah, Yeah,
I'll put that a lot.
Speaker 2: Fresher in the winter.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, I was like, yeah, let's see you on
stage in front of a room of five hundred people.
Speaker 2: Kid. See yeah, I'll put a couple of you, buddy,
any rate. There you go. We have we we woke
ourselves up, ladies and gentlemen to bring you another spectacular
episode of the Tom and Jerry Show, which this is
I'm Jerry McBride, that's Tom. O'Mahoney tired, weary old men,
just tired, miserable.
Speaker 1: Although I will say I got a I feel very guilty.
I gotta do you know, like these you see these
New York housewives and stuff, these wealthy people that do
you know, and they did they start doing nearly criminal
activities just to get a bit of a kick from
their wealthy, mundane lives. Yeah, I need to show you something.
And I am a fucking criminal right now. I'm a criminal,
and I kind of bit of a thrill about it.
And I'll have to sort of what are we looking
at there, Darren with moose traps, A couple of moose traps.
I picked up moose traps because I thought I saw
the fucking makings of one. And that big bastroom cat
has gone too fat. Next door. He's not eating them,
and I said I'd better pick up moose traps. While
in Woodies yesterday, again not sponsored by Buddies, but they
were in the sale thing. The young lad he's building
up his tools collection. He wanted the Phillip said, screw driver.
Can't argue with young flow when he wants. Phillip said,
screw driver.
Speaker 2: Off.
Speaker 1: We went, bought that, got Lindsey oil, bees, wax, all
the usual things that are gonna be getting on a Sunday.
Paid for that, walked out, jumping and card. Drove home.
I found I hadn't paid for the two. So I've
I'm a fucking bandit. I've stolen. I've stolen to.
Speaker 2: A tie at home for the for the times we
live in right now, they might actually come after you
for that, and you've just made me an accomplice.
Speaker 1: There. I have the receive. I will go back in
and pay for it. I will, but just let me
have this my fucking Clyde of Bonnie and Clyde moment.
Speaker 2: Will you play a little sort of known a ride
or shoplifting thriller?
Speaker 1: I'm just thinking, yeah, when shot.
Speaker 2: We've known a rider that she became the Patron saying
a shoplifters in their time.
Speaker 1: Do you know as you'd swearing nobody else to that
and Ron in Hollywood?
Speaker 2: Do you know what I'm telling you the worst? I
challenged her to name another shoplifter. No, we're known a
writer and that'll be better.
Speaker 1: But she like, you've all these other ones than Pep
Weirdo shipping in these other's beds and stuff, and you're like,
she ficked a few bits of clothes and she got
absolutely blacklisted for twenty years until stranger things she told.
Speaker 2: She told them that she only had twenty penny sweets
and she had thirty in the bike. This is the look.
Speaker 1: Do you know what I felt for the time? And
I feel for her now that it took her twenty
or thirty years to bounce back from the whole fucking thing.
Speaker 2: And it must be said, we know if you're listening
to the show landover Tom, Tom and Jerry here now
we look after you.
Speaker 1: We will to bring into Woodies on a spree. Just
don't ask Jerry to fucking carry whatever your robbin.
Speaker 2: Yeah, if you're if you're robbing, you better have the
spine where with all the carried out of the shop,
I have no help.
Speaker 1: We'll start well, yeah, we'll start in the in the
in the light tool section has about that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, starting the light two sections, we start the show
as well. Tom, we got to bang on show. We're
back to regular schedule promogramming. We hope everybody enjoyed last
week's episode, which was just a bit of a wander
around the meadow of a thing. But we're back, no
fucking around, Tom, It's the weekly what have you? This
is a very complicated case, Mad, you know, a lot
of a lot of outs, a lot of what have you?
Speaker 1: And uh, a lot of strands to keep in my head?
Speaker 2: Man, what have you got?
Speaker 1: We have any mountain things to talk about? God, there
was a lot of interesting stuff this week, but one
kind of got my When you sent it out to me,
I'm like, yeah, I think that's what I'm gonna do,
because you know what, This is right up our street.
If nothing else, Tom, this is right below yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
this is right below Earth Street.
Speaker 2: This is the ongoing phenomenon, phenomen nomenon, nomenon of ohn
as men. It must be said, can't even say their teenagers,
can't say their mutants don't appear to be Ninja's to
my eyes. But there are grown men who have taken
to going into the sewers in New York City for
what purposes that is unknown to the Tom and Jerry
Show at this point in time, But more and more
people in Queens and Brooklyn are being recorded lifting sewer
leads and going down into the New York sewers. Tom,
your thoughts.
Speaker 1: Is this like just the you know, the hacky sec
of twenty twenty six, Like is this a thing? Or
are they all just going down their circle jerk? And
what's you know? Is thereing a cult thing happen? And
you know what, is it just because one person didn't
and didn't die? They're like, this sounds cool.
Speaker 2: We're our theories, Tom, there are.
Speaker 1: Theories bored out our fucking head. Let's say down to sewers.
Speaker 2: Do you know what there are theories? Number one one
thing that has been ruled out is that these aren't
These aren't homeless people like you know, and apparently as
I researched this, if you're homeless in Las Vegas, there's
a world of tunnels underneath.
Speaker 1: There's a whole huge go watch the Vice documentary. People,
there's a mayor there's an underground mayor.
Speaker 2: There's a whole thing like only Las Vegas. It's just
like a honeycomb of of activity of people down there.
This isn't that okay. So these appear to be and
from the videos that I've seen, Tom, I want to say,
kind of hipsterish. For one guy came out with a skateboard.
Speaker 1: Do you know if you're hitting down the sewers with
a skateboard, you deserve to be fucking cracked across the head.
But now there was Jordan Covid, I think there was
Hasidic Jews had kind of come up with a plan
because you couldn't move overground and they's you know, broken
through under their temple to move back around. That kind
of made sense with the rupt all right. But I'm
wondering because you think about sewers, you're going I'm going
to die. Do you know I think of sewers, You're
going to die.
Speaker 2: I remember seeing those those Jewish lads and this is
not that either. No, this is going down into the
and we stressed it again the sewers underneath New York.
Now the most famous sewer d rathers we knew were
the teenage mutant Ninja Turkeys who lived in the sewers
on the New York and they made it look great crack.
To be fair, you have bunk beds and fucking.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you could eat pizza down there.
Speaker 2: You could eat pizza that, you could get pizza delivered.
Speaker 1: You could. You could draw somebody as prettiest April O'Neil down.
Speaker 2: There exactly, and April would just go in her yeah,
four night out if we be there in a dress
going like, Lad's come here of a deity here Now,
I can't be down here for too long.
Speaker 1: Bank a shit. This is what I'm thinking that I was.
Speaker 2: Just going to say. We have talked on the podcast
before about how you and I have run it out
drains before, and that was a drain out of airhouse
with don't want to be gross.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean I've dealt I've dealt with large main
drains like you know, four foot ones Brere Greg. But
this is you know, you're fully masked up, your you are.
Speaker 2: Year, You've got the Chernobyl.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you're not gonna bringing that ship literally shit particles.
Speaker 2: Well, these guys are going down there, Tom, and they
know what they're going in for, because these lads are
killed out with them with waders. They're they're wearing waist
high waiders. So they're going down there to wade and
ship and pissed water out of a.
Speaker 1: So have they gotten that fucking board that in New
York you're going? Is this like splunking, you know, like caving?
Speaker 2: But these are is this some sort of urban exploration
kind of getten?
Speaker 1: Now?
Speaker 2: I will say, if you're going to explore a sewer,
the New York sewers probably would be the ones to
do it, because I've seen some images from it, and
they do look like these quite ornate, red brick built
kind of turtles. Wasn't the documentary, but it wasn't one
hundred percent line either. They look the business. They look
pretty cool.
Speaker 1: A lot of them do. Linking with there's an awful
lot of underground infrastructure, from service tunnels to all disused
raila like there's this much like it is with cheese
under New York City. You'd wonder how any of the
buildings still stay standing up with the yeah that they've
they've excavated underneath there. But you're you're you're taking I
don't care what anybody says, you're taking your life in
your hands. That's why I don't believe it's just a
random couple become fashionable. I think, like, I'd love to
think that there's it's something cool like that. Remember the
rave in Blade Underground that I personally could be just
with three lads of it. I think it's a it's
a bunch of curious lads down their circle. Jerk.
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, I just well, there are a couple of theories.
Would you like to hear them?
Speaker 1: I'd love to hear them.
Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, there is There are theories that these guys
are going down looking for something. People just can't seem
to agree on what right they are looking for some
sort of resource to bring back up and and and
sell profit farm. We're not very certain on what this is?
Speaker 1: This what's fucking Godzilla? What the fuck did they think
is down there?
Speaker 2: Like, well, the only thing, the only thing that I
can like in the two was a very disgusting story
and sorry to no let's have it to the listeners
of the Tom and Jerry Show, but you did you
ever hear the story of the sewer fat?
Speaker 1: Yes? Yeah, but they they did you ever see how
to clear it? In France? The same one no, I'll
go on.
Speaker 2: I think we're talking across propers. I'm not talking about
the big fat burgs that are are down there. In
a second. No, no, no, street vendors in China, who will
they can buy cooking oil, Tom, they can buy cooking oil,
or they can skim it from floating on the cover
the sewers and back up and they'll cook their hot
dogs and and and chicken wings and that.
Speaker 1: I'll tell you what you have.
Speaker 2: That's the thing that happens.
Speaker 1: You will have a healthy, fucking, good fucking history if
you can survive that. The Jesus the super drains.
Speaker 2: That's an example of a resource that you can find
in there. Okay. Number two is that these guys are
using it for nefarious purposes. They're going down to the
series in New York City and looking for weaknesses to
get them I don't know, underneath the fucking got them
city bank right and rub the safe or something like that.
But they're they're down there for the various purposes to
uh find Internet lines underneath businesses and hack directly in
for conciphoning off millions or whatever the hell. Okay, there
is no proof to suggest this, but people are really
wondering why the hell these lads are going underneath the series.
Speaker 1: I mean, you've got it. You can't just pop I
need to tell people like you can't just pop a
manhold it, like you need to set a manhood key.
It's made, you know what I mean, or fucking go
by a set of manhaalkey. So there, it's a bit
of weight in it, like you can up throw to
the side, like, but you want to find a quiet street,
like if if they're out on the street on the
foot path, you might get away with it. But typically
they run underneath streets. Yes, for the purpose of knowing
exactly where the pipelines are run. They followed the street lines.
Speaker 2: Yeah. The other the other and final theory is they're
going down there for the fun, tom because life sucks
and you need something to do to entertain it. And
they've tried parkour and they're no good at it. And
they've tried urban exploration. What everywhere has been discovered above ground,
So they're just going underground for the thrill of it.
They've run out of abandoned shopping malls to go pooching
through and I love that shit on YouTube. And now
they're going on the ground.
Speaker 1: But how how is it still a mystery if these
lads aren't making TikTok video.
Speaker 2: If they're not if they're not posting online, if they're
not putting on me. And that's why that's it's the
covertness of it all that suggests that.
Speaker 1: This is how many fellows we talking about? Is it
popping up all over the city, like Queen.
Speaker 2: It doesn't seem to be the same people over and
over again, but there are various groups of people, and
it seems to be located mostly in the Brooklyn and
Queens areas near Brooklyn. I know, it's kind of hipsterish central.
Speaker 1: Right yeah, yeah, yeah, so it'll be like HiT's it
be like something to be at and then the Queen's
I mean, all you think is coming to America?
Speaker 2: Sheese your queen up?
Speaker 1: Yes, you shut the fuck up too.
Speaker 2: So so the mystery of the New York City mold people,
as they are been called, has yet to be has
yet to be solved. It has been going on for
a good month now at this stage.
Speaker 1: So we're cooking up drugs down there.
Speaker 2: What's like, could we could very well be you know,
that's never let it be said that you're looking for
somewhere to doing the various illegal things, and you can't
do it in your mom's house. But now someone's going
to give out you for cooking up drugs in a
in a in a in an abandon apartment. They're also
going to give out you for wandering around stinking and ship.
Speaker 1: Because I can tell you now there's going to be
some bangish like you see people you know in movies,
Like so often in movies, it just people could just
slides through and they go, oh, yeah, you know, my
feet are wetter. That's a rat. I'll tell you now,
you're feeping wetter, a rat. It's the least you're fucking worries.
It's it's not a bit wi eature, you know, fucking hormone.
You've got twelve million people shitting in a pipe. I'm sorry,
but it's going to be fucking unbearable down.
Speaker 2: There, Tom. Anybody that's been been lucky enough to visit
New York in the lifetime knows what the fuck it
smells like on the streets.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, on a warm day in New York all that,
and take it on the ground. It smells like fucking
sack river. I just imagine remember the Ecto pleasant ye
Ghostbusters like just that's is that what they're up to?
They're the Ghostbusters.
Speaker 2: These lads don't look like Bubblebusters to meet him. To
be honest with you, okay, I will leave you with
this here from from the Guardian newspaper as well a
local New York or hold NBC New York. Three random
guys walking around. They go on the store. They open
up the store and just jump in like the Ninja Turtles,
to which the Garden goes on to say the man
was referring to the comic book Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles,
which depicts the lives of four turtles who live in
the New York sewer system. The turtles are brothers and
we're exposed to really active wasted as youth, which turned
them into human turtle hybrids. Trained in martial arts by
a large rat, they fight New York criminals. The story
is not based on real events.
Speaker 1: Very good. I like that. I mean they filled out
the content brilliantly, because it's all there for then rounded
and half nicely. That was done as McBride can't tell
you that was done before lunch.
Speaker 2: Trying to hit a ward count, but also, yeah.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna just stick with a circle of jerkin, so
you know, just they're going down to pull each other
as we.
Speaker 2: Have we have, we have got to find out more
on this as we get it. But we're gonna move
on from those lads to another lad. And I'm terribly
sorry we don't appear to have a non gross show today.
It's pretty fucking gross, Tom, why don't you tell them
about this week's this lady?
Speaker 1: I suppose it's gross in almost again almost hipster fucking
fashion in its own way. So we do love a
good dead body, and as everybody.
Speaker 2: Knows, well, you know what, we like one on the
Tom and Jerry Show. If you're going to be a
dead body, you got to be dead as fuck. Okay,
we don't want any recent debts, it doesn't get any
crack from that. And we don't want any serial killer
victims because we're not that kind of podcast. So you
got to be super Yeah, we want legendary stuff. Would
five thousand, three hundred years ago be dead enough? Freuture?
That's right in the wheelhouse of the Tom and Jerry Show.
Speaker 1: Nice well, a bloke that people may have come across
in the past, because he he's not on display or whatever.
But I mean there's been a lot made of this chap.
His name is Outsi, and they reckon he's older than
five three hundred.
Speaker 2: Years old, this frozen three and one.
Speaker 1: Yeah, the frozen mummy, right, and I mean yeah, sure
you've heard of the Batman and stuff like that. And
this guy's will very well preserved as well. He was
a frozen mummy that was found back in ninety nine
ones and they've had him that long at minus six.
Just keep him safe, right, because he is unbelievably well preserved,
like he's still got hair, he's still got all his skin,
flute is still kind of their a bit, you know
what I mean, he's there's a fair.
Speaker 2: Fair where is where is he hanging out here?
Speaker 1: By the way, So they keep him in as sorry,
they keep he was found by German hikers in Northern
Italy region of South Tyrol, and they keep that he's
still in Italy. So they keep him with this Italian
based team that are I think it's a they're microbiomes specialists,
this crowd. So everybody's had to go off this lad.
Speaker 2: From everybody's had a pot from.
Speaker 1: Skin people to fucking like teach people to try and
get a snapshot of what what it was like what
Utsy was up to, you know, five thousand, three hundred
years ago, plus maybe he could be seven thousand years
ago for all we know, he's old. This is as
good as they can do with well UTSI, right, and what.
Speaker 2: Is there to be learned from this man?
Speaker 1: So way, this really latest thing that has popped in
is a crew. They're getting a look in his guts, right, like,
how much does this guy still have? Turns out, I'm
keeping up beat here, Jarr because for me and you
all know what kind of a pessma sam when it
comes to these things. And I think Jerry's going to
follow me down and down this road. As soon as
they started explaining some of it to this crowd. Doctor
Mohammad Sarin of the Urak Research Institute in the Italian
city are Balzano, Hey, he told CBS News he's a
bad the hust living living jer go on living met
the body polically capable organisms that are actively responding to
their environment. They're actively responding to their environment currently, Jerr, what.
Speaker 2: If we're gonna have We're gonna have some listeners actively
responding to that accent.
Speaker 1: Tom, I know, and you're more than welcome. He's doctor Sarahan.
I'm not suggesting he's actually Italian, but he could have
been there for a while and picked up a bit
of an accent. So essentially this is where it kind
of gets scared. So there's yeast. They're found in his stomach,
right right, they found Yeah, Well here's the fucking thing.
This yeast is starting to adapt, starting to adapt to
the cold. I don't know, it's the minus six they
put him in. Has been adapting slowly all along. But
it's basically gotten through his They don't think he ate it.
They think they had him, had bread on him. Do
you know what? I fell abross sandwiches. That's what they think, right. So,
but it's made it through and nestled in his God
because it was on his side, and it's in his
skin now as well. It's in his skin, jerkin, that's
where it is. And with the last few decades him
in isolation, even at minus six, it's it's kicking off,
it's kicking off chair. His guy yeast is because you
see he did he when he defrosted that time, that's
when it really started to kick off because of in hyperstasis. Right,
but it didn't fucking burn out, this yeast that was
in him, on him, it didn't burn out. So now
it started actually genetically alter his what would be his
DNA in the localized area where this fucking yeast is
now growing and surviving and has adapted. This is where
fucking scientist, he fucking cuts. Would you not just fucking
I'm sorry when you when you when you discover that
Osi goes in the bain, I'm sorry, he goes in
the fire.
Speaker 2: He's going bad.
Speaker 1: He's well, he's not not, but he's not. This is
the thing. The yeast is fucking this fucking sa anybody's
seen the fucking last to us Jesus Christ, Yeah, I
mean this is literally right with This is where this
is where it goes to functure. Because they could go, oh, grand,
lock it fucking down, people, lock it down, masks everybody, masks, everybody,
lock this cont down, right, get him in a fucking
sealed tube or fuck him in the fire, one or
the other, because we need to fucking isolate whatever's going
on here right now, right yeah, because because this fucking
thing is starting to come to life, essentially, on Otsy
over the last couple of decades and it's starting to
kick off now and they could have left it there,
but what they decided to do jar what they decided
to do Nope, as fucking gas past scientists, they scraped
this yeast off his body and basically using it. They
i'd propagated it in a fucking egggar dish and decided
to make a very very good sour dough. So so
they have made sourdough off this con skin that has
been fucking now over the last couple of decades morphing
into some weird shit, and they all in the office
had to go.
Speaker 2: They all so that they they had a five thousand
year old, five thousand plus year old corpse called Otsy yeast.
And the more I the more I delve into the story, Tom,
I have to put my hands up, and I'm not
entirely sure what yeast is or what I thought it
was is not appeared what it appears to be. And
they scooped up a load of gik off this dude
and the fucking bacon bread and then they're just like
whenever it's Vincenzo's birthdays, like hey, we bet you we
bet you take your bread here, Vincenzo.
Speaker 1: There you go. Yeah, so your man is Epty Bread
one of the lads. So this is Frank's maxiner. I'm
gonna go out and the lemon, say his German for
the crack, right, because this is the accenter getting If
I tell you, it's going straight forward. If I tell you,
if anyone tell you they have a yeast, and this
is where that's how fucked up sientist brains are. If
anyone tell you they have a yeast, you made it
to ask can we use it for bread? No? No, no,
no no. Jerry tells me his yeast. I said, get
a cream.
Speaker 2: Lit, Yeah, I get it, get it, get a tube stuff.
Speaker 1: There, like get a Creamlet stay away with me.
Speaker 2: We don't don't. It's not like put a wee bit
of an envelope and sent to me.
Speaker 1: Like I don't go. Can you scrape off some of
your fucking some of your filings off your flute there
and send it to me and I'll make bread for
the family out of it?
Speaker 2: Like how doty do you think my flute is?
Speaker 1: IM just saying it's just if you tell me you
have yeast, I got a grown man do you want
me to delete that off the podcast. I don't want you.
Don't want you telling anybody you've got yeast this kind
of things.
Speaker 2: If you just puts the record for the podcast, I
don't have yeast on me that any anywhere.
Speaker 1: Not now the cream has cleaned it all up.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'll tell you, man, that's.
Speaker 1: According to this fuck this is where all their brains
when you.
Speaker 2: Rest assured Tom, every fucking scientist on that team looked
at each other without saying anything. They all just knew
all the idea at the same time.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, so you think what I'm thinking. Yeah, they did.
And that's when you're too close to the fire. You
see this. When you're too close to the forest, you
won't see century. And they are all stuck up Utsey's
hole literally for the last thirty years. And when they
finally found yeast in him, when they got to go off,
and they're like, fuck off serious because all the other
lads had to go with the bone lets that to
go the fucking skin leads had to go the.
Speaker 2: Teeth lets marrow or something.
Speaker 1: And now these lads get to go of him in
the last couple of days. And I don't do you
know what make I want to make fucking bread off
his back. That's what we'll do. Let's take a fucking
plane and plainer and just rusk It's just fucking some
rusk off.
Speaker 2: It's just just sprinkle him over our spaghetti like like
parmesan cheese. Tell me as much, Tom. You know we
can use used to make beer as well, can't we.
Speaker 1: That's the thing, right, we're not making beer. I pought
to his fucking balls. I'm sorry.
Speaker 2: Oh no, no, let's just stick to the bread.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, of course. It's a magical fucking thing. It
really is. It's up there with like it's kind of
a magical thing and that it will come to life
and create life around it like it's it's one of
those things in the universe that's kind of fucking but
terrifying along with because there was a thing here where
they were like, oh, they treated him for fungus, so
his body doesn't break down like it did, did you really? Digit?
Because I don't know much about fucking yeast, but I'll
tell you one thing. It acts a lot like a
fucking fungus, and that it fires shit up like and
gets things going. And if anybody said the last of
us or any of those fucking zombie scary shit. This
yeast is working despite it being like Utsy is dead
as fuck.
Speaker 2: Good night, show me someone deader than NUTSI.
Speaker 1: And the ship he had in his pockets is still firing.
So how magical is that shit? We are fucking rubbish
in comparison to the east he had in his pockets
whatever he had.
Speaker 2: Right, let me ask you a couple of questions, Ham,
and then we'll get the hell off this subject here,
because there are you know, this segment is of course
this lad and and and as we came into it,
we thought this lad was Utsy. Ah, there are these
lads to go around because the scientists. I have to
give them a special comment Jury award for adbastardness, because
I gotta tell you, not only would the natural normal
human might not conceive I'm doing this, you sure as
fuck wouldn't.
Speaker 1: Taste it when you hear your colleague or leader of
the of the group come out with this phrase, the
cold adapted yeasts are growing. Certain bacteria have colonized and
persisted across his tissues for decades. The mummy is, in
a very real sense as a living biological interface does
all that? Like, does all that? Not fucking scream? Get
him in the fucking fire. I'm sorry, I'd say we've
gotten all we can out of you. But you're getting
in the fire.
Speaker 2: Time to go back in the ground, buddy one or
the other. Yeah, get him in a pine box and
get him six feet under.
Speaker 1: But no, jar, let's fucking grade him like you said,
like fucking fromage and whatever. We what scrapings. We get
off and let's make some fucking sour though, and sit
down and have some toast.
Speaker 2: I can't eat sardo tom good time, as any of
Italian clowse me up.
Speaker 1: You can't you but supposed to be good for you?
Speaker 2: Well fucking tell him I got that right?
Speaker 1: Okay, Well then fair enough.
Speaker 2: Maybe I'm just maybe I'm just eating it after a
night out of like six cans or something like that.
Speaker 1: And that's maybe this hour, though, you're getting some for
this ball sack that died five years ago.
Speaker 2: What do you even like? What do you even do
you make a sandwich out of them? Do you make
a nutty sandwich?
Speaker 1: Yeah? I guess so. I mean, but this is again,
this is what happens when you get led fucking hipsters
and mad bastard and scientists in around the place just going.
You know it will be awesome, like fuck me, fuck
me man.
Speaker 2: Seeing the dawn of a new day. Because I didn't
die from eating this ship, that'd be awesome.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, But ground zero for Ireland of a certain thing,
and I don't even want to put it in the
Algorithm Matter podcast, but ground zero for was students flying
back from a holiday in fucking in ski holiday in
Italy and landing in fucking Wicklow. And that's where browns
and that's where crossed the family. That's what caused the
most recent exactly well.
Speaker 2: I have one last question, is one one last question
I have for you.
Speaker 1: I hope I don't have the answer for it, but
go on.
Speaker 2: He will give you a challenge. What do you think
Utsy would have to say about all this?
Speaker 1: Get the fuck away, you loan? The dick is five
thousand years old.
Speaker 2: I'm like, be his accent?
Speaker 1: Oh oh sorry, I fucking anthropologist Jerry over there. I
don't know what his accent was back then? Was a
challenge I put up, you know, okay, okay, give me
back my fucking bread, you snaky, snaking bastards. So he
would say, but he's fucking what is as like, oh
Jesus Christ, like like the brownish water that ran off him. Afterwards,
they kept it and like found and you know, like
it wasn't just on his skin like the brownish like
California man basically defrosted a little bit in the lab
like he would. Let's say he was at minus twelve.
They got him to minus six. They said, tell me enough,
and we can still work on him then, because minus
twelve he's as hard as a coffin nail, So you
can operate. You can suck around with a fill at
minus six, put a load of brownish water. And they
also found the yeast biomes microbiomes in that too, So
you know what I mean. Basically, the fucking geek the
float out of him.
Speaker 2: It's you're eating gig brewd people, ye learned scientists.
Speaker 1: And I've guarantee you we'll be on holiday sometime in
Milan and the be utsy loafs for fucking sale likely.
You know what I mean this, You got have a
fucking canoli over here. It's made of fucking utsy fucking toenails.
You know, great, great, that's fucking great. The whole world
is going to fucking go absolutely fucking gag.
Speaker 2: This is good.
Speaker 1: We're all going.
Speaker 2: Under another It could catch off and we all beaten
loaves pain pointed here because we matcha cappuccinos in Starbucks.
Speaker 1: You know, we have been called it better than the
fucking Simpsons of late. We have been willing things into existence.
We almost I kind of got it wrong, but I
think Bye, we almost willed Mikey Graham into message to
Saturday Night was like, Mike, we will Mikey Graham at
to play with Boison. It was as you said, Brian McFadden.
But like you know, I think we think we might
have mentioned.
Speaker 2: Bringing Mikey and out of the not for me to
claim it, Tom, I'll.
Speaker 1: I'm telling you now, there'll be another fucking mad outbreak
of people fucking just going. What they'll be doing is
just destroying delicatessens and bakeries, just like rabbit fucking animals.
Speaker 2: Be destroying the titles.
Speaker 1: Jerry be the safest man in the world. I'm sorry,
I just I.
Speaker 2: Just can't not for me. Yeah, commre Tom, We're going
to rock and roll, Let's see. God damn, I can't
wait for the comments. Section on that one. But from
now we're going to rock and roll. Into the closing
segment of the Tom and Jerry Show, we take a
look back at our oh long lines.
Speaker 1: You know.
Speaker 2: The segment is called we Remember when when I was
a young lad, twenty or thirty or forty years ago,
the Harson, We remember when Tom was always things that
have happened in our lifetime that when you look back,
it's like, wow, it's maddened, that kind of that we
were there for the start, middle, and you know the
way things are going the end of these things.
Speaker 1: Uh.
Speaker 2: In particular, this was inspired by the fact that Toy
Story five KG is out this week single. We are
very much looking forward to it, and this has We're
a big toy story family, always have been, always, I
dare say, will be. But it's it's it's it's the
standard these days of Tom, Computer Animation, Pixar, the Shreks
and the and the toy Stories and all this. Here's
the thing you and I were around before any of that.
Speaker 1: I was only just like I was trying to explain
the Mad Ship to the two small for the recently,
and I know I've talked about it, but one that
came up was biker mice from Mars. And he's looking
at me. Now. He didn't say folk off because mad
coming out of six year old. Although I've heard some
fucking things of training here this even though it might
be having a chat tomorrow now. But he looked at
me like I was mentally he was like, what, No
explained this to me? Break this down for me. I went,
I do one better. Let's watch it. I says, this
biker like my motor cyclist rats sitting on a yeah,
like they're mostly they're not local boys either. Yeah, different Mars.
It's like that's a lot going on. I went, do
you know it really is? And that was Cartoons of
the Year, Earthwarm, Gym and the like, and I put
it on, thinking this blast nostalgia and he was like
he was looking at it like the same way when
we were kids. If somebody puts like a Buster Keaton
movie on, ye is this archaic ship?
Speaker 2: Where's the other dimension?
Speaker 1: Yeah? Where's the other dimension? Like what he wasn't given out.
He was like, was this did you watch Did you
watch this? I was like, yeah, yeah, well that that is.
Speaker 2: The thing Tom, that like every cartoon that you and
I watched as a young fellow, whether it was like
The Simpsons from the fifth from the sixties all the
way through to any Disney movies that came our way
two or belowd Turtles and He Man and beyond, was
your standard pencil and pen and pencil drawn ye to
the animation all the way up to The Simpsons done
with a pen and paper by incredibly stressed Japanese animation
studio working their fingers to the bone and then run.
About nineteen ninety five, Toy Story came out as being
the world's very first computer animated film. The very first
was the very first feature film, right there had been
shorts and bits and pieces, and an actual fact, the
very first time I've seen anything that was computer animated
was the video for Dire Straits Money for Nothing, And
you had these little PlayStation one man walking around the place,
barely humanoid. You have to kind of look at it
to see the It wasn't just like a pile of boxes, yes, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah yeah yeah, And that's where I suppose that's
where it was. The ground was broke there and it
just opened a whole new business because and I guess
people stress out there, like when new things come around
the corner. Obviously AI is coming around the corner, and
they've kind of had to put stipulations in place. Whore
like you gotta be robbing our jobs.
Speaker 2: You can't just do everything.
Speaker 1: But if there's one thing you find people are unreal
and making a gig out of a thing, like, there'll
be the next thing around the corner will have to
involve humans, you know what I mean, Like it'll get
to a point where you're like, oh, sure that may
be less humans or whatever, but they it'll always there'll
be some cute tour come in and go hold on
a second, And that's just that's that's just what computer
graphics and and the like did, like when it came
fully animated.
Speaker 2: I gotta tell you, like, you know, I want to say, tom, like,
we didn't grow up in a golden age of animation.
If you look at the animated movies that came out
now I was, I got to the cinema twice a year,
and we didn't have a video player for longest time,
so you didn't get to see an awful lot. But
now with respect and if anybody has fun memories of
all dogs go to heaven and an American tale, this
kind of thing, like it wasn't the glory years of Disney.
Even Disney had kind of fucking run the ground at
that stage.
Speaker 1: Ian after Banger, I do remember going to see Fiveley
and it was a cartoon. No, I can remember it,
not blowing my mind, but gone, I've never gone this
thinking this is good.
Speaker 2: But well, yeah, well, I remember we were talking about
school tours a couple of weeks ago for a for
a faith friends trip, for our confirmation trip. I think
it was we were taking to see the Jungle Book
re released. That's all I remember. I've seen a bunch
of Disney movies that had been out for fifty years,
but to re release them into the cinema for money,
I suppose. And we're all there twelve looking at this,
going like, well, this is the last cartoon now ever
fucking watch. Sorry, we're done, And then in nineteen ninety
five outcomes twy Story. Now I will say Tom, I
was too old for and I know you were a
year below me, but I say you were older than
me in age, not older than me in age, but
older than me and spirit. And it wasn't the way
chance in hell we were going to go with fift.
Speaker 1: That's a nice way of saying tammy or an old cunt.
Young elsehold when you're you're an old fucker, when you're
a young fucker. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I could see the adsw twice story and I
was like, I'm not a baby anymore, but fuck me,
I kind of like, that's that looks like it's good.
Speaker 1: Crack. That looks like it's I do. I definitely don't
think I went to the cinema to see it, but
I definitely want. I got myself to see because it
was just we hadn't broken ground with anything sure cartoons
that they were pretty much doing the same thing they
were when Mickey Mouse was, you know, smacking himself over
the head with a fucking mallet like our Popeye was
cracking open cans right up until that point.
Speaker 2: And I gotta tell you, Tom, here's a when we
say we remember when we remember a time when grown
ups didn't watch cartoons.
Speaker 1: That's a major thing, because jeeus.
Speaker 2: This thing of being Disney adults wasn't a thing at
the time.
Speaker 1: Well, I it's the first time actually hearing that.
Speaker 2: You never heard the phrase Disney adults.
Speaker 1: No, never, never people, Yeah, I'd be I like, and
it's it gets you all the way to and it's.
It was a very smart thing to do because they
quickly realized that if we're going to get adults to
come to these feature length films, yes that are cartoons
for kids, we better start writing in some stuff. Do
you know what I mean?
Speaker 2: This is the thing.
Speaker 1: Yes, go on and you start writing in your and
then it's almost like when when I did the Panto.
At the time, my only sole purpose was to be
a real person, over the top comedian, real person amongst
panto characters. And I would literally walk up with this mustache.
God yeah, and all the adults in room going thank.
Speaker 2: God, yeah exactly, because that's.
Speaker 1: They'll take a stick of their beer, going okay, all right, here's.
Speaker 2: What here's what it was. Now. When when we were small,
if we ever went to the cinema, we'd be dropped
at the cinema. I'm going to go do the she
weren't gonna come in and fucking watch the cartoons.
Speaker 1: Face.
Speaker 2: But you know, obviously the makers of these things decide
like it's it's one thing to get the kids money,
but we want the parents money as well. So, like
you said yourself, you throw in a couple of jokes
from mom and dad, and all of a sudden, it's
it's it's Yes, it's a spectacular three D animated movie,
but it's also something that the whole family will want
to go see. And I'm telling you that, I'll tell
you this, tell anybody that asked me.
Speaker 1: Right.
Speaker 2: I didn't see Thy Story in the cinema because I
was too old for it. But yet, somehow, five years later,
when I was at college and Toy Story two came out,
I was there fucking open a day with like three
or four other lives. We fucking roared their holes off,
laugh and the whole time. That's the funniest shit I've
ever seen in my life. Up to that point, that
was just like genuinely funny, great movie. And after that time,
it was like, okay, what else you got?
Speaker 1: Because that's it. There's no fucking way I would have
sat down to watch a cartoon. I wouldn't even through
my twenties and like, but then I started the grasp.
I was like, oh wait, they're writing it also for
us all right up until very recently we went to
see the Super Mario, Yes, super animated, Like you know what,
I mean get more animated, but hilarious, you.
Speaker 2: Know, thrown in gags for the family.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and they do it so well that it subtly
flies over the kids' heads, Like because the two guys
beside me, they're going, okay on the next scene, I'm
cracking my whole laughing because they're like, okay, that's good.
Speaker 2: And you know now that this newfangle three D animation
was a thing and Disney were making money hand over
fist with these things. Others followed suit, and that's when
you had the likes of Shrek come along and Shrek.
I'm going to tell you right now, Shrek was written
for adults and produced for kids.
Speaker 1: What Like I couldn't believe that it actually when it
when I saw it first, I went, why in a
parallel fucking universe?
Speaker 2: I am loving this, like this is love of this,
like it's it's not like a childish thing. That's just
just straight out funny. And I remember going to see
Shrek too in the cinema and the talk.
Speaker 1: Of a Friday evening, like a Friday evening, like yeah.
Speaker 2: You know, and and and not a not not a
single child and it was just like a four to
five hundred grown ass adults in a hard to please
turn toms laugh.
Speaker 1: And notoriously please. Yeah, I'm gonna tell you that much.
Speaker 2: And and I reckon. We had a couple of good
years of that where it was like, okay, lads, this
is a new thing. Keep the quality high and then
let loose the dog shit because now anybody could do
it and any fucking nonsense. And you know, quality dipped, it.
Speaker 1: Really did. But I think quality dipped on all because
we're you're going for the comedy to these things. You're
not going for sucking the story, right, you know what
I mean? But comedy has dipped fucking cat in the
last couple of years. I I've attempted to watch three
different comedies in the last couple of weeks on between
Netflix and Amazon and fuck Major. It's like, I don't know,
they've just clipped all the wings of any fucking humor
that be anything, or it's a regurgitation, a poor regurgitation,
or something that's been done already, even you got it
down to now Will Ferle is making complete another ship
like he went to make a golf movie there recently,
Like no, no, no, no.
Speaker 2: You're comedy and you participate in enough sports there well
and yeah, copy and paste. And we've seen you with
ice skating, you're good. You're good. If we're going to
do what you've seen you with the Eurovision, we're all right.
We know that. What's your what's your mileage? Tom with
the young man, does he does he watch feature length
animated movies? Are just us grown ups? No?
Speaker 1: He will, he'll now, he'll get there like at six.
He'll get there, all right. And we went recently to
see one called Goat and it was a bit of
goat playing basketball.
Speaker 2: I missed one.
Speaker 1: Shite grant shite.
Speaker 2: You see. This is the thing now everybody's out of Tom,
you know, and it has become a commonplace and the
quality has has slid, But not for nothing. We were
there at that, I dare say, I want to say.
We weren't there for the golden age of two D
animation back in the day, but we were there for
the golden age at three D when this thing was
Brand's Bank. Can do you genuinely had seen nothing like it,
And even though it was made for kids, they wanted
the adults money, so they made extra effort to get
the adults money. Here's the thing. I want to tell
you them. Right to D animation. We all know how
that's made. You know, you draw a picture on a page,
and you turn the page and you draw the same
picture on you wee bit different, and then you keep
doing that thousands of times and you flick it all
together and it looks like fucking the biker mice from
Mars or rolling off to the sunset. We were here
for the advent of three D animation. To this day,
thirty years after the release of the first toy story,
I have no fucking clue how to do it.
Speaker 1: It was tried to it. It was explained to me
by a very nice fella from North of Ireland who
has made BASIC's company went uh fucking gangbusters as a
result of the effects that they did for Game of Thrones,
did great fucking giants, did dragons and dragons and ship.
The same guy, he understood the opportunity was worked through
the night when I was needed. You know, one of
these fellos got done, but he was trying to explain
these dragons to me and how, and he got lighted
the third sentence and you can see this poor old
lace come over my face. He's like a fuck it magic.
Speaker 2: And yeah, good enough, good enough movie magic. That's what
it is good because like I get that you build
it as a as a as a three D thing
in a computer, but when do you when do you
when do you take the picture of it? When do
you take the picture of it and then move it
a little bit and take another picture? That just happened automatically,
I think it is.
Speaker 1: I used to be able to draw in three the buildings,
so you would give each point a value, so the
x y and z, so x y left and right
and z had been up the way and that would
be you just give each point of value. And that
was kind of how he got it across to me
a little bit. But it was because I was going,
this is a piece of basically just right into the programs,
not really just because now us you you do have
an artist impression of the dragon up on the wall.
That dragon needs to be fucking moving now and it
needs to look this shit like. And then you're talking
about the same three dimensional stuff having to lay it
over green screen and things, you know, And it's like geees,
because it lent itself. It exploded from there, the three
D animation, but it lent itself then to be able
to be plugged into feature length real films. In that scenario,
we're even sucking a dragon that clearly isn't there at all,
doll flying around the sky. I mean, the highest way
that we had was like Masters of the Universe with
sparks and the odd lightning bolt, you know what I mean.
And yeah, yeah, that was the height of the SFX
we had. But then, as you said, the three D
animation just opened the door to.
Speaker 2: All the animation, you know, And I kind of it's
so odd, Tom, I can kind of understand how you
would get a terminator running around in a Terminator movie,
but like with something with ty story where it's like
all nothing, no, nothing exists, all completely done. Yeah yeah, computer,
computer and a man's voice and a woman's voice and
that's it. No, don't don't get it. Don't get a buddy.
Speaker 1: I know, I don't understand I and it can. But
sometimes it can be kind of lost on you too,
because you can give too much fucking effort to the
notion of what it is. Like funny is funny, you
know what I mean? Like you get the speak with
me that were aiming for all the other things and
the shock to everybody that the speakable me was funny
was the lads who weren't even speaking English. The little
tick text shell yels.
Speaker 2: And now you can't move. There's another Minions film coming
out as well this summer as well. I think they're
up to about by by air count in the house.
This is this will be number seven when you add
them all up.
Speaker 1: Okay, six of fast me by anyway, I'll tell you.
Speaker 2: That you know, when we say things out, stay are
welcome or we're aging out of it a little bit
in this house, but we're very much looking forward to
tie Story five, Tom, And as you say yourself, let's
see what comes next. Let's see what comes next.
Speaker 1: The main thing is that Tom Hanks is still getting
plenty of orc anyway, this is it. And by the way,
if any anybody who because I'm going to get Jerry
down and I want you to do the joke. Do you
did that bit you did when you manage tie in
toy story into a bit about a medical examination. We
get that, loved it. I love it.
Speaker 2: I want to leave your one tidbit. And my wife
told me this for like ten years and I was like,
you're having me on your your you're fucking having me on?
Speaker 1: Or this is a dub talking to a culture now
is at this this moment?
Speaker 2: Yeah, Like, no, that's true, that's that's true. You can
tell anybody that that's true. And I'm like, no, So
I'm about to tell the listenership with the Tom and
Jerry podcast believe me if you want, don't believe you want.
Tom Hanks does the voice of Woody enty story?
Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, but you're not.
Speaker 2: Tom Hanks is too busy to be the voice of
Woody in when you buy a Woody toy or when
you when Woody shows up in a computer game. Tom
Hanks doesn't come in and go, what do you want
me to say? Howdy, partner, press start per start the game.
I'm too busy for that ship. You know. If you
get a toy story read long book and you press
the button to make Woody's voice, that's not Tom Hanks.
Speaker 1: Hold on, so are you telling me like mister t
isn't on the GPS and I.
Speaker 2: But I'll tell you this is the best one of it, right,
I'm like, okay, which is so far? Or if if
if Woody's in Disneyland or some ship like that, and
He's like, how you partner even must be this told ride,
this ride or whatever the fuck it might be. That's
not Tom Hanks. That's Tom Hanks's brother, Jimmy Hanks.
Speaker 1: Fuck off. It's like Stallone's fucking brother stepping in for
whenever he needed abs. Fu Off, She goes Google.
Speaker 2: I was, I won't dignify it with a Google. You're
not getting me. I don't believe you, And then I
did Google you. There you go, Tom Hanks's brother, Jimmy
Hanks stepping in, scooping up all that woody money.
Speaker 1: We need a new there's a new cafe after opening
in the Supervaluan Tip Town. He might cut the ribbon
on it there, so you're serious, Jimmy fucking Hanks. Jimmy,
that's out. Do you know, Jimmy Hanks sounds like a
fill of the place country in Western and dunbet Jerry
never know.
Speaker 2: But I'm not you know what?
Speaker 1: I want people to challenge you on that. I'm not gonna.
I want to challenge me on a cheerley.
Speaker 2: You can challenge me on the social media channels at
Tom and Jerry Show. Tom would a tea, Jerry would
a g will get us on Instagram where we hang out.
You can find Tom Over on Instagram as well at
Tom O'Mahoney and I am at Jerry McBride with a
g over on Blue Sky. We have one comment in
from last week's episode Our Hair and scarem Bank called
a Blader Skou episode Mick m Smith twenty ten and there
you go, says, very funny, great crackfeller holidays, Thank you Mick,
and then he signs off Mick Madeira, Now are you
in Madeira Spain? Or did you just throw in your
favorite cake at the end?
Speaker 1: There, I'm one hundred percent reckon it's his favorite cake.
Speaker 2: There you go, Well, he's very much.
Speaker 1: He's he's in Bundoran at the minute and he just
eaten some fucking cake and that's what it is. Yeah, yeah,
the very best best of all of you from Tom
Victorious Sponge.
Speaker 2: You know, he's he's he's sort of he's dictating that
into into Siri, you know, Siri write this out. And
then just as he's at like, you know, someone comes
along and you want cake make it Like yeah, yeah,
I love the podcast, love the show Madeira. What else
have we got? Wait?
Speaker 1: Is Madeira is in Spain? It's Portugal.
Speaker 2: What you know, you're the geography man, Tom, Yes, the
brother building a house out there, and there you go.
John chimes in on Instagram just to say that the
name of our microphones, our road microphone. He says, are
you getting roaded by technology? I like that.
Speaker 1: That's you know what, that's an effort. There's an effort
put in there, and not everybody's, not all of mesers,
but there's an eff put in there, and I like that.
I like it, and sleg too.
Speaker 2: When the audio is poor here we say we're road rotten.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: And then William James, you're right, Tom, these aren't all
going to be winners if you're not even gonna fucking
smile at mine.
Speaker 1: I did that kind of a mood. Now I got
fucking shown up by fourteen year.
Speaker 2: Old Yeah, John, you and me both. Mandam's just a
hard audience. This week, William asks if you invented a sport,
what would it be? I think we I think we
covered this with sterred induced carroled freestyle diving.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, it'd be all all all bets are
off like but I will I definitely there's loads of
things out like in that could do with improven like
I think zero zero tackle rules in soccer, widen the
goals and maybe put you know, put fucking fire or
barbarire around the pitch.
Speaker 2: And then I'm going to give you two words. Tom
HiT's gonna give you two words, and to William as well,
and to the listeners of Tom and Jerry Schul I'm
not gonna expand on it. It's gonna give you these
two words tackle golf nice. Yeah, there you go.
Speaker 1: I'm with you on all of that.
Speaker 2: I like these fine people. Do that.
Speaker 1: HTE subscribing whatever platform you're on, just like the lad's
commenting over on Spotify. And when you're there, give it
the five stars or the five tons, up for the
five whatever you can give it, give the maximum results
hit subscribe to and the bell icon so that pops
in every single tour stay and if you wouldn't mind
sharing it with the friends and family, that'll be absolutely fantastic.
Jar I'm going to go draw my sorrows after being
embarrassed by a child this evening with some more ridiculous
amounts of Madeira kick Madeira kick.
Speaker 2: For all, all right, go on, take care of body.
Good look