Speaker 1: In the year twenty seven fourteen, a new squad of
Opera Davis was chosen by the College of Illusion. These
fools promptly went on to frustrate their DM at every opportunity. Today,
still working together because really, who else would work with them?
They survive as adventurers of fortune. If you have a problem,
if no one else can help, and if you can
find them, maybe you can hire the Second Breakfast Club.
Speaker 2: Tony Kinney as Eddie.
Speaker 3: Falzoni, Jess Owen as a deer a Glow, Michael Cole
as Urag and.
Speaker 4: Jesse Wicks as Bill Crilliance.
Speaker 3: Nico Rodriguez as your DM.
Speaker 1: Welcome back to the continuing tales of a Fool's Quest.
Speaker 3: So when last we met our heroes, they was diretic
were half the party remained walruses, we're seas warus sounds,
huddle of Walls, a huddle of Wallrice Walses and the
other half went into town to do some shopping as
the fools do. As the fools do, have shop will
trouble on a budget, on a budget, even though they're filthy,
fucking rich.
Speaker 4: Yeah, we got a really really cut costs. W everything
except for words.
Speaker 2: There's reasons we're rich.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we're frugal. Build Best Best into a evokers outfit,
and scored a couple of wagons for real cheap prices
from a shopkeeper who is being oppressed by other evokers.
Speaker 4: Come to see the powered hat in the system.
Speaker 3: And outside of that, Bill and Adira both went to
the shops and Bill was able to get glasses for
his face so that he can yep, so he still
got his powers. Then they went to go see uh
this potential healer who had a very slight chance of
being able to heal Adira, but instead made it so
that she can no longer glow. She is glowless, and
she's blue.
Speaker 4: She's blue and cold.
Speaker 5: I wonder if you go on the other way. And
now when you if you rage, you go ice.
Speaker 2: Baby?
Speaker 6: Does anybody want to find out who wants to piss
off Adira.
Speaker 4: First points to Bill. First of all, I don't want to,
but I'm going to. I'm going to. It's not that
I want to. You have the neck, that's it's a gift.
Speaker 3: And then the healer or the tincture or the yeah,
the charlatan. Charlatan told them about her master, who was
a hermit up in the residence Peaks. His name is
Baron jan kaichows she.
Speaker 4: Was cutting potions. I think I think Elmer designed the
industry standard. Yeah, maybe she's related long loss. I didn't
see any goblin in here.
Speaker 5: Well, it's been a couple hundred years.
Speaker 3: So after she poisoned the deer as she turned real green,
since she would be real sick all of a sudden,
and as you travel, they did a they already did
their while magic. Well there wasn't a wild magic. And
the reason we're not doing a perilous journey.
Speaker 7: Is because you're heading directly into peril at and Bill is.
Speaker 4: Diuretic perilous, A little bit of parel much much too perilous.
Speaker 8: You'll get, don't you.
Speaker 3: So they traveled in the dark, and.
Speaker 6: Bill used his eyes as torches.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, Bill's eyes are headlights.
Speaker 6: If you wink, are you using a turn signal?
Speaker 2: Just blink a bunch of times with one.
Speaker 3: I'm not.
Speaker 4: I'm gonna be sit here and be mocked by a
frosty cricket.
Speaker 3: Uh, there are weird noises coming out from the mountains.
You guys are traveling into the mountains away from the city.
You've been traveling for a few hours. It's getting closer
to morning, but not quite done. You're probably an hour
out from don. You've been traveling all night, pretty exhausted,
and oh Rag, I need a wisdom safe from you,
for a wisdom rule from you to see if you
know what these animals are.
Speaker 4: What thatt I do? He knows thirteen.
Speaker 3: Not only do you know what they are, you know
how many there are. There are four razor bore creatures.
They have these large tusks that can shred metal plate.
They're voracious, savage, and unstoppable. They tower over mundane bores,
so they're huge. They're like a version of oh Rag
as a bore.
Speaker 5: I was really big with I changed into a razor
when we were at the school when we were being pranked.
Speaker 4: That was like one of the first the spurs or
second things the second.
Speaker 3: So yeah, no wonder. You know exactly what they are
and very familiar with them. They are extremely territorial.
Speaker 4: So there is four of them, and they hate flash capes,
yes they do.
Speaker 6: And crickets, guys, we got trouble cricket sickles.
Speaker 5: Razor bars and the thickets there I hate about four
of them.
Speaker 8: M hmm.
Speaker 5: But they gets where I would recommend we either go
around their territory and let them pass through. It might
not be a good idea to confront them directly.
Speaker 2: M you're the expert on this kind of thing.
Speaker 4: Is there anything that they are afraid of that I
can think of?
Speaker 3: Yes, hill giants.
Speaker 6: They probably fire, which I cannot do.
Speaker 3: Mmmm.
Speaker 8: I don't know if I can do it.
Speaker 4: I can do fire.
Speaker 8: I wonder if I could do.
Speaker 5: A hill Jane, were the shot?
Speaker 3: Mm hmm, yeah, tried.
Speaker 2: What are they doing.
Speaker 6: Making noises?
Speaker 3: There's sound. They're just making noises. You can't see him
quite yet, but they're definitely making aggressive noises and coming in.
Speaker 4: We're entering their territory and there let us know.
Speaker 3: They're not pleased, and they can they're moving in your
direction eleven okay, so.
Speaker 4: Hm hmm.
Speaker 3: So as a shape change, you're you're adding a bunch
of mass. I'm going to your druid character really quick,
the druid and.
Speaker 6: Bill is just shooting himself the entire time.
Speaker 2: Sound effects here two seasons ago. Jesse's character, which should
other people's pants?
Speaker 4: That's true, Yes, yes he did. Mother Russia pat shits you.
Speaker 3: So what I'm going to say, is that to get
up to their size, the size of an hill giant,
you're going to have to spend one point. Okay, and
so you had three yeah, okay, uh, and you don't
You don't really have any weapons or anything, right.
Speaker 5: Just my normal stuff. What I could probably do is
just increase my own size to hill giant stature.
Speaker 3: Okay, so you maintain your own appearance and stuff, but
you're a hill giant. Yeah size. Yeah, So I'll say
that's one point because it's just that amount of mass
being added on.
Speaker 4: But the cape doesn't grow with them, so it's just
real times around my waist like a like a jacket.
Speaker 2: It's just a little neck flap.
Speaker 5: Now, yeah, I can hide it under my cape.
Speaker 2: It's like a really weird flipping over and wear it
like a hood.
Speaker 3: But something that's still might float away, you don't know.
Speaker 5: Yeah, And with that in mind, would I have leverage
to like pull down, kick over a tree or anything,
or would that just shove me all over the woods?
Speaker 2: Hmmm?
Speaker 3: I would say if your feet are on the ground,
you could leverage doing that. You're still strong, you still
have that, all right?
Speaker 2: How a magic weapon on the tree he kicks over.
Speaker 3: All right, So you got to make a strength roll
to see if you kick over a tree ten ten?
All right, yeah, I want to say that does this
is one of those thin trees, you know if it
gets really tall, but you can yank it up.
Speaker 9: Okay, magic stick, Yeah, okay, so when you shape change,
you keep all your stats for damage and everything.
Speaker 3: But I'm going to do this. The magic weapon gives
it plus one to damage, plus one to damage, and
I'm gonna say it's plus two to damage because it's
a fucking tree. All right. So you're walking and I
assume you're walking ahead of the wagons now into the territory.
Yeah okay, and you can hear them getting closer, but
they kind of stop short and they're walking around the
parimeter and you're trying to intimidate them, right, yeah, they
are not. So after a few minutes you get to
a clearing. What I will say is this, with your
really good roles that you've had, you get to a
clearing that you think is a good defensive position, and
you can stage that. However, you'd want to stage it
right now before they come charging it. Okay, they might
be starving, might be a part of the reason.
Speaker 2: Well, we don't have food to give.
Speaker 8: Them, so.
Speaker 6: Got forty rations of hot buckets. I cannot rage.
Speaker 4: Why can't you think?
Speaker 2: I only prepared two spells, but one of them's a doozy.
Speaker 4: We'll be okay, I'll look at him.
Speaker 3: She was given that potion which took away all of
her fire.
Speaker 6: That's why we're going to the mountains.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but it took away the fire, doesn't take away
her rage. That's where her rage comes from. Oh, it's
tied to her.
Speaker 4: Hey, nobody, uh nod.
Speaker 6: He's made me mad yet, so nobody.
Speaker 4: Walked between me and the piggies. Knocked. I said, nobody,
get between me and the piggies. You told He just
immediately what Oh? Because it was just funny Because I
was like, why is he so baffled? I realized it's
because I literally always do nothing but put other people between.
Speaker 8: You.
Speaker 4: He said, oh that you have to playing character. He's
in a mood now, so he's brody. I'm cyclops soon, yes, cyclic.
Speaker 3: Some havoc all right, So how are you guys setting
this up?
Speaker 8: So?
Speaker 5: Uh, while he's setting up a line of sight, and
pull my.
Speaker 2: Wagon off to the side because I think finds in the.
Speaker 5: Front or park, one off to the left, one off
the right, funnel them through the middle and let you
uh ap the shot out of him in the kill zone.
Speaker 2: Sure, yeah, that's fine.
Speaker 5: I'm gonna see what I'm gonna find some stumps or rocks.
Maybe I can chuck at him.
Speaker 4: To be clear, I am pooping myself. This whole thing's
arm for a second.
Speaker 2: Son, that's what a nice things too well.
Speaker 4: Jesse liked it, so it's not weird, dude, Thanks Tony,
you made it awkward.
Speaker 6: Everybody knows what's happening. I mean, that is a wagon.
Speaker 2: Bill's gonna, Bill's gonna sidclaps the pigs. Yeah, I'm gonna, yeah,
I don't know. Chuck some rocks, all right, spells, but
one's a doozy, all.
Speaker 3: Right, So tell you all the four you're all staged.
The poor bores come charging in and uh chuck rock
first or laser beam shirts laser beam all right, so
you can hit You can hit two of them pretty
easily with your laser beam raz.
Speaker 8: Laser.
Speaker 2: You're gonna make them into laser wars.
Speaker 4: Peel razor boar laser beam six. Sorry, I shoot them
with my blaster eyeballs, What do I? What do I
rolling for this? O?
Speaker 3: This is your normal to hit in the your normal damage.
Speaker 6: He doesn't normally do this.
Speaker 4: He's out of his element.
Speaker 3: It's like a volley, right, yeah, yeah, I stare really
hard and nine. All right, So you hit them, but
you put yourself in harm's way, which makes sense because
you just put yourself up front.
Speaker 4: So do I have a damage to you? Do damage
the six?
Speaker 3: I think it's D six, but I'm double checking.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's what it said on my sheet.
Speaker 3: And that's what it is.
Speaker 6: That's what it is.
Speaker 4: That's a five plus anything or just fine.
Speaker 3: I think that's one. Is what I said for your
eyeballs before to two of them, stairs.
Speaker 6: Really hard and ships himself.
Speaker 4: Calm, start back.
Speaker 3: All right, and then rocks.
Speaker 4: Nine.
Speaker 3: So you volley so yeah, so for volley you yeah,
you're pretty much reducing your AMAS. So you're only going
to get to throw the rocks this one round. Those
are the only rocks nearest team. Rocks were hard to play.
Yeah on the in the mountains, hardly.
Speaker 2: Any I've seen it.
Speaker 6: Oh my god, that's the dearest hunting the planes.
Speaker 2: I'm not good in rocks.
Speaker 3: He did just grab a tree that you can still
use to once closer.
Speaker 4: So how much damage weapon isn't there?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 8: Yeah?
Speaker 3: How much damage do you do to the first razor?
Speaker 4: Boar eight?
Speaker 3: He just splatted im. He's still charging at you, but
he hit the back rear end of him and left
out a piggy yelping you legs off. He keeps coming
right at Yeah, all right, a dear uh, Percy's gonna
cast major armor on you to boost your armor A
plus one.
Speaker 2: And I'm gonna cast fantasmal killer at the one that
hasn't back hit.
Speaker 9: Okay, less than nine, so I'll take the minus one.
Speaker 2: Okay, ongoing, And the way, did you get much?
Speaker 3: Oh that's sad?
Speaker 2: Yeah, who ragg?
Speaker 3: Did you hit one that had already been hit before
or a fresh.
Speaker 6: Show he was the first one to hit.
Speaker 3: No, it's not that you hit hit two.
Speaker 2: You hit two.
Speaker 4: Yes, probably a fresh one, a fresh one, probably one
that I knew that Bill wouldn't hit. So what is
that supposed to me? Well, there's four and you got
two eyes, so I just did the mask rough.
Speaker 6: Next time, shake your head and get all of.
Speaker 9: Them all right, But that too, I think we determined
that does that ignores armor.
Speaker 2: That's why the damages.
Speaker 3: Oh okay, I will mark that because I left the
armor on so boo.
Speaker 5: I was.
Speaker 2: I was like, this seems really low for fantasmal killer.
But yeah, I think that's what we determined.
Speaker 3: Psychic damage. Yeah, uh, dear bro did a dear here
all the way from you know death. Oh, you would
have gotten patched up about eight hit points.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, for the most part you were Yeah, yeah
you did. I think you were. I think at the end,
if I remember, I had like twenty two. I think
I think you were down like two or three hit
points almost for you.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and then you went to the metic, so I'd
say that you're good.
Speaker 6: Okay, yeah, let me hear myself.
Speaker 4: So we played it all of a sudd you still
had like a little Claire a Gable or something.
Speaker 3: Your shoulders got that little hitch, little little.
Speaker 8: Hitch to it.
Speaker 6: All right, What am I doing?
Speaker 4: You attack and razor? You can tell when it's gonna rain.
Speaker 6: Hurt like hell, when fucking Bill is near me with
that stupid head.
Speaker 10: That was the thing.
Speaker 5: I'm just walking through to everybody's left rights.
Speaker 4: What the heck back now?
Speaker 2: Mind to hit?
Speaker 4: Want to say with myself some kind of upside down
umbrella with a with a spigot.
Speaker 10: I don't have any bets.
Speaker 2: You can have it back when we go to the punch,
All right, uh.
Speaker 6: Nine to hit for ten point of damage? Oh man too,
I don't know whichever one are they in a line?
Speaker 3: They're all kind of spread out and Ryan Thji. Two
of them are close together. That's why Bill was able
to hit them, but the others were spread out. Which
one do you hit the one one of the ones
that Bill did, or do you get the one that
was coming.
Speaker 4: Up towards Bill?
Speaker 6: Yeah?
Speaker 4: Yeah, old.
Speaker 3: Guys, all right, now they are going to charge in
and attack. Yeah, all, so they charge in with their tusks. First.
The first one is going after Bill. That's a hit,
and he is doing six points of damage three piercing,
So if you have armor, it bypasses your armor up
to three.
Speaker 4: Oh so okay, so three of it's piercing. So if
I had four armor, then you always I only have
one armor, so I have zero existence.
Speaker 2: Right, okay?
Speaker 3: Attacking also a hit, so for six points of damage
with three piercing. The other one's going after a dera.
That is a hit. But you get to hit it back. Oh,
and then the other one's going after Eddie. Oh yeah,
and a hit you don't get to hit it back.
So what did it hit?
Speaker 8: Me? For?
Speaker 3: Six points of damage? Three piercing. It's just a flat
number for these things.
Speaker 6: So since I have two armor, right.
Speaker 3: It bypasses it. So you just take all six damage.
But a dear, you get to smack the third one back.
Speaker 6: And technically I'm in a rage now right, Ah yeah,
so that gives me extra to this fucking hit.
Speaker 4: Yeah how did that look?
Speaker 3: So you completely frost over?
Speaker 6: Do I act in my move?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 3: Yeah, you can move, but you're.
Speaker 6: Like, I'm like, mister freeze screamed, nice to meet you.
Speaker 8: I hate it.
Speaker 6: I got a rolled a third route to hit and then.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you didn't even need a roll, you're just hitting it.
Speaker 10: Oh yeah, that's right.
Speaker 8: Sorry.
Speaker 6: Oh for three points of damage I think oh sorry,
four rage?
Speaker 10: Four points of damage?
Speaker 3: All right, they're all still alive. It takes us back
up to Bill and they're spread out now.
Speaker 6: Bill, so I'm just an icicle swinging.
Speaker 4: Chair around and move around to try and get on
the wagon and play himself.
Speaker 11: At ten, I'm okay, okay, okay, so a twelve.
Speaker 8: I believe me?
Speaker 4: All right, sure a chance you wouldn't, Yes.
Speaker 6: So my dragon tu.
Speaker 3: I'm assuming yeah your axis?
Speaker 8: Sweet?
Speaker 2: Check your damage up next time?
Speaker 4: The riers I did jack my damage up?
Speaker 3: And who.
Speaker 4: I can't? That's what some like rocks. I want to
scoop up that tree?
Speaker 8: Ye?
Speaker 2: Plus one? Oh wait plus two?
Speaker 3: That's the damage only the damage to your attack eight eight?
All right, so it's gonna be able to hit you
back for that six with three piercings. So it's gonna
just gore you seven seven damage?
Speaker 2: Uh?
Speaker 3: That does it?
Speaker 8: Sweet?
Speaker 3: So it throws its tusk right into your left leg,
and just as you're bringing down the tree, just squo.
Speaker 4: And a dera.
Speaker 3: Your weapons have now frosted over.
Speaker 6: Are they gonna shatter?
Speaker 3: Maybe if your critical fail?
Speaker 6: Oh wait wait, didn't we do something with my weapons?
I don't remember what it was. Got it repaired to
where like it never took damage? Or remember getting that
confused with low Pi's weapon.
Speaker 3: Oh, Loki's weapon doesn't take damage and it never needs
to be sharpened.
Speaker 10: Okay, that's what I was thinking about, all right, Never mind?
Speaker 3: Are you trying to steal Loki's Pikilo's weapon.
Speaker 6: No, we figured it out.
Speaker 3: It was yeah, no, I know, all right, So what
are you doing?
Speaker 6: Oh what am I hitting?
Speaker 2: Yes?
Speaker 6: Turn sorry? Nice eleven for four points of damage. Adira
is not very effective when she's unicy.
Speaker 3: That's okay, it's dead.
Speaker 4: Well, usually Bill's got you ramped up.
Speaker 2: Yeah, usually phantasma.
Speaker 4: Okay, I would cheer around, but I'm rude.
Speaker 9: Yeah, that's a seven this time, I'll forget the spell okay,
and three damage but ignoring arm YEP.
Speaker 3: Just chipping away at it light. Well, it's gonna try
and gore you again. That's right next to you, and
it misses this time. So your phantasma killers really fucking
with its head and it starts shaking its head all
over and it just completely misses you as it charges.
Speaker 2: Forward, making the sea visions of hill giants smacking it
with magic treat.
Speaker 3: YEP, the one that it was attacking Bill. Bill had
moved away and used his magic stuff. It decides to
run toward Rag, but it it takes a few steps
back as it gets closer and does not hit anyway. Sorry,
because he sees the giant tree and you. Let's go
ahead and go back to Bill.
Speaker 4: I'm gonna look at that one that just ran away
after rag. I'm gonna look at it with the fury
of a thousand sols, okay, or like just a couple
of guests, because I just got the seven.
Speaker 3: So you're just lifting your eyeglasses up dad.
Speaker 4: Yes, yeah, winking. Actually no, because I'm Bill. I'm actually
just slagging them down on my nose, over.
Speaker 3: Them like a disappointed.
Speaker 4: Library to hold a seven?
Speaker 3: All right?
Speaker 10: Does he gets to hit you back?
Speaker 2: This? This?
Speaker 4: This because I buffed to myself ten damage?
Speaker 3: Ten damage? Okay, so this puts you in harm's way
because that's a volley. So ten damage, zam right, and
it's us too helpful and it was over near oh
rag eight again, Yeah, that's a hit, so gonna get
you back.
Speaker 4: Nine damage.
Speaker 3: That's enough to kill it. So again it goes your
right leg and you're looking like ace Ventura with.
Speaker 4: You just be had some both. So the heads are
sticking out.
Speaker 3: Of them some bushes and with a tree, it's just
the heads left. Yeah, all right, dear, all right, that
was two.
Speaker 4: Yeah, both of those did six points trade yep, okay.
Speaker 12: Okay, m hmmm, we takes seven to who there we
go for eleven points of damn points damage ten point damage.
Speaker 3: All right, there's two left on the one that was
trying to get Tony and it does six points back
to you, and it is Eddie.
Speaker 9: I'm going to pull up that wand up twin spell
and twins some minor illusions, and me and those two
are gonna go three different directions. Okay, and I'll forget
minor illusion.
Speaker 3: Okay, see you forget minor illusion. All right, I'm gonna roll.
Speaker 2: Huh are there trees?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm gonna climb a tree.
Speaker 3: Took try low medium or high medium? It is low,
all right. So on its turn, it turns and it
just goores the Eddie illusion that's closed this to It
just rams this tusk right up through its chest and
out its mouth, and then it disappears into nothingness just
as Bill takes his next turn.
Speaker 4: Let me see that happened, Eddie.
Speaker 3: I do you know you were a ghost?
Speaker 4: Oh what's the most beat up?
Speaker 8: Right now?
Speaker 3: There's only one left?
Speaker 4: No, no, not from that. All right, I'm gonna a deer.
You're doing so good. You're so fast with with your
weird crookedly wings. Got some fancy work. Excellent, so eleven.
You believe this ship out of it right, Actually it's
an eleven before my book, So that's a fourteen. I'm
gonna give you two D six damage and your D
eight that's not a D eight. Enjoy your five hit.
Speaker 13: Points those skirts half namar, let me have this one,
ye all right?
Speaker 3: So who Rag's gonna differ? Idra?
Speaker 6: Yep, You're gonna obliterate this motherfucker. That's why I want.
Speaker 4: I'll distracted while she's moving in for the kill shot.
Hit puts out the meat cap, put put the hog
head on each hand and remember using like muppets, yea
trailer quis dummies.
Speaker 6: Twelve points of damage to this motherfucker. That your that's
with everything?
Speaker 4: Yeah, frozen bacon yep?
Speaker 6: Actually yeah, I didn't roll all over. My ten was low.
I don't know anyway, he's dead, uh huh. He's running
at me. I'm running at him, and I just golf
clubs motherfucker right in the chin and everything goes flying.
Speaker 3: Yeah, just into pieces all around ice shards.
Speaker 6: Does it? Did he freeze?
Speaker 8: Is that what happened?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 4: Knocks him up in the air and he comes down
a little prepackaged.
Speaker 3: You have that messy death bag. So yeah, that's exactly
what happens.
Speaker 6: Little icicles rain down on everybody, porksicles. Nobody gets wet
because it's frozen.
Speaker 4: You're welcome, bill, Porksicles.
Speaker 3: And just as the last razor boar is obliterated, obliterated,
the sun crests the eastern side of the mountain range
and you see a very large boulder flying through the
sky and lands directly in the middle of the pet
and you hear a loud booming voice as as a
head appears right in the middle of the sunlight right
and it says.
Speaker 8: That was a Wardy Shork.
Speaker 3: Our heroes will return after these messages. Hey there, it's
Nico again. If you'd like to skip the ads next time,
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dot com. And now that the commercials are out of
the way, it's time to dive back into the foolishness.
Speaker 8: That was a Wardy Shork.
Speaker 2: Did a warning about what to.
Speaker 8: The road and Nico away.
Speaker 6: Hm hmm, my legs are pointed backwards. I can't go
the other way.
Speaker 4: Do you know Baron Housing? What's its j.
Speaker 2: Baron kai Chausen. You heard of this man?
Speaker 8: I've love for of what's his name?
Speaker 6: Yon kay Chausen kai Chausen.
Speaker 2: No, listen, we just we need his help because his apprentice,
Cherry kind of.
Speaker 6: Well, I'm not supposed to be a cricket.
Speaker 2: She experimented us and it went wrong, and she promised
he could help.
Speaker 4: We brought pork.
Speaker 2: We do have a lot of pork to share.
Speaker 4: I'm gonna speak frankly with him. Okay, listen, how can
I get you to take me to Baron.
Speaker 2: Man?
Speaker 8: I want something very shiny that no other giant has.
Speaker 3: We have to have something shiny.
Speaker 4: Hold on, Actually, I have something for this?
Speaker 2: Where is it?
Speaker 4: How about this golden water flask? I have one of those.
I don't remember when you gave it to me, but
I have it.
Speaker 8: It's from home here a little man.
Speaker 6: M I was gonna take me days to get to you.
Speaker 10: You're so far away, Oh why little lakes.
Speaker 8: I will meet you down there.
Speaker 3: Thank you, And he starts coming down the mountain.
Speaker 10: Where shed began, Yes, you're driving six white horses.
Speaker 3: Gets it, gets down, and he bends over at the
waist and puts out his giant hand for you to
put the flask in.
Speaker 6: It's so tiny.
Speaker 2: Doors, it's shiny.
Speaker 4: It holds water. Oh lord, other liquids if you prefer.
But it's golden and it's shiny. I guarantee you no
other hell giant has it.
Speaker 2: It's got Bill's and initials on it.
Speaker 8: Okay, what do you want with the barrier?
Speaker 4: We need him to fix my friend's legs in my
eyes and.
Speaker 2: Meat curtain.
Speaker 4: Yeah, his flappy bits.
Speaker 2: I wouldn't mind resting a bed.
Speaker 3: That more hurt I need to heal.
Speaker 8: Yes, I was hunting the boars poor breakfast.
Speaker 2: Oh we'll see, because they're right here. I mean, oh
yours were?
Speaker 4: These two look squished a little tenderized.
Speaker 6: Oh sorry about the one. It's preserved completely unseligible.
Speaker 3: He pulls a big net off his back and starts
like loading the boars up into it and then slings
it over his shoulder. Whoa follow, Yes, sir, and he
goes trudging up the mountain.
Speaker 8: I keep pacem the.
Speaker 3: So called me often, he says to a dragon.
Speaker 8: No, first time. It's a dois few.
Speaker 2: Pretty country?
Speaker 8: Yes, indeed, you're a hill giant like me. Occasionally they
say that we don't belong in the mountains.
Speaker 4: That's true.
Speaker 8: Wherever we are, we belong long.
Speaker 4: In the mountains. You belong in the hills.
Speaker 6: You guys belong in the hills.
Speaker 8: He's a giant.
Speaker 2: He belongs wherever he wants to belong. Where Where does
an eight hundred pound guerrilla sleep? Bill the fun he
wants to, Wherever the fuck he wants to.
Speaker 4: That's not true. Tell you where he's not sleeping in
my fucking bed, my bed, not in my house.
Speaker 2: Well you get to tell it, then.
Speaker 4: I will.
Speaker 8: Do you have more shady things in your house?
Speaker 2: I do.
Speaker 8: I might sleep there.
Speaker 2: Will always be welcome, But it's a long journey house.
Speaker 6: No, but will quiver Lance's house.
Speaker 8: That's his name, quiver Lance.
Speaker 6: Write that down.
Speaker 4: Yeah, but I use a pseudonym when I buy a house,
so for my property, because I don't want my many
adoring fans to find me, I.
Speaker 3: Use bird Man, Larry bird Man.
Speaker 8: That's that's the.
Speaker 4: Name I use.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Old Bill, always using pseudonyms.
Speaker 4: You know, Eddie, I was gonna tell you how good
of a job he didn't combat. Now I'm not gonna.
Speaker 2: Nice survive.
Speaker 6: Oh I didn't even say time to glow.
Speaker 2: Wow, so gloy Teddy's days.
Speaker 3: Maybe that's why it didn't work.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: So he takes you through a village of about two
dozen other hill giants wow that are up there, and
he says.
Speaker 8: Traid dee ball. They will play with you like little
toys if you stay here too long. Keeping up, keeping up.
Speaker 3: And you see a small hill giant. A hill giant
child comes out and like wants to put the horses,
but his mom scolds him.
Speaker 8: She's like, no, eve, do horses a loom.
Speaker 3: He stomps his foot, the ground shakes under you, and
after a little while, still get careful. They takes you
a good chunk into the day. The giant actually stops
a couple of times to ask if you need to
rest and use the bathroom and heat anything. And then
he continues on the way up and he takes you
to this cave that's up near the top of the mountain. Really,
I mean we're getting to the part where there's snow
up there, right and the tree lines have kind of
died away, and he says, there's.
Speaker 8: The cave with the barren loves.
Speaker 2: Thank you very much.
Speaker 8: We appreciate it.
Speaker 2: Now we know your name.
Speaker 8: Yes, my name is the foot that squashes the cherry
blossom in summer.
Speaker 6: Strong name, cherry foot.
Speaker 4: Got it.
Speaker 8: It's a little feminine, the cherry blossom. Sus what, No,
it doesn't. Oh Bill, he's implaying. He's gonna step on you.
Speaker 4: Don't do that.
Speaker 8: Good luck with the bird.
Speaker 2: Thank you, and we appreciate your guiding us here, allowing
us through your h territory.
Speaker 6: Bim.
Speaker 4: Yeah, we appreciate it. Enjoy that that golden flask and breakfast. Yes,
thanks for not hitting us with that rock.
Speaker 3: So he starts trunging off down and you see a
guy come out of the cave, wild, erratic hair, older
looking do dude, and he says, what do you want?
I'm Baron. Hey, I was gonna say the right one.
Uh huh, I was gonna stay there. I'm Baton, John
kite Chausen. What brings you here?
Speaker 2: You?
Speaker 3: And that's probably a good place for us.
Speaker 4: It's up perfect, beautiful ladies.
Speaker 14: This concludes this episode of a Fool's Quest, and join
us next time for more fun and daring adventure. Thank
you for listening, and don't forget to like, a subscribe, review,
and comment on your favorite platform.
Speaker 8: To listen to a Fool's Quest,