WEBVTT 1 00:00:01.560 --> 00:00:05.599 This is Pastor Rick's Daily Hope, the audio broadcast ministry 2 00:00:05.639 --> 00:00:09.359 of Pastor Rick Warren. Today we continue in a series 3 00:00:09.439 --> 00:00:13.240 called Better Together. In this series, Rick takes us through 4 00:00:13.320 --> 00:00:18.079 First Corinthians chapter thirteen and shows us how to cultivate deep, 5 00:00:18.280 --> 00:00:22.600 meaningful relationships with the people around us. In just a 6 00:00:22.640 --> 00:00:25.160 few moments, we're going to tell you how you can 7 00:00:25.199 --> 00:00:28.719 get a copy of Pastor Rick's book called God's Power 8 00:00:28.839 --> 00:00:32.399 to Change Your Life. In it, you'll discover how God 9 00:00:32.439 --> 00:00:35.520 provides the power you need to take you from where 10 00:00:35.520 --> 00:00:38.719 you are to where you want to be. Find out 11 00:00:38.759 --> 00:00:42.280 more by going to Pastorick dot com or by texting 12 00:00:42.320 --> 00:00:46.359 the word daily to eight hundred, six hundred five thousand 13 00:00:46.399 --> 00:00:50.439 and four while you listen to today's message, that's Pastorick 14 00:00:50.520 --> 00:00:54.520 dot com or the word daily to eight hundred, six 15 00:00:54.600 --> 00:00:58.880 hundred five thousand and four. Right now, here's Pastor Rick 16 00:00:58.960 --> 00:01:01.920 Warren with part one of a message called how We 17 00:01:02.039 --> 00:01:03.240 Help each Other Grow. 18 00:01:07.560 --> 00:01:10.760 Let's read together Romans eight twenty nine. Would you read 19 00:01:10.799 --> 00:01:15.560 it with me? From the very beginning, God decided that 20 00:01:15.640 --> 00:01:18.680 those who came to him, and all along he knew 21 00:01:18.680 --> 00:01:23.719 who would should become like his son. The third purpose 22 00:01:23.760 --> 00:01:27.280 of life is to become like Jesus Christ. While you're 23 00:01:27.319 --> 00:01:29.359 here on earth, God wants to get you ready for 24 00:01:29.439 --> 00:01:32.239 heaven and he wants you to grow in character. He 25 00:01:32.280 --> 00:01:35.159 wants you to grow spiritually. That's what we're going to 26 00:01:35.200 --> 00:01:37.680 look at today. How do I grow spiritually? But more 27 00:01:37.719 --> 00:01:40.439 than that, how do I help each other grow? Because 28 00:01:40.480 --> 00:01:44.640 the Bible teaches you cannot grow spiritually on your own. 29 00:01:45.840 --> 00:01:48.599 You have to have other people in your life. That's 30 00:01:48.640 --> 00:01:50.879 why we talk so much about small groups in this church. 31 00:01:51.280 --> 00:01:54.760 You have to have other people to help you grow. 32 00:01:54.959 --> 00:01:58.599 In fact, look at the next verse first, the Salonians 33 00:01:58.959 --> 00:02:01.239 five eleven. I'd like for you to read this aloud 34 00:02:01.239 --> 00:02:04.359 with me, plus also read the reference. First Thessalonians five eleven. 35 00:02:04.400 --> 00:02:08.639 Let's say it together. Encourage each other and build each 36 00:02:08.680 --> 00:02:13.240 other up. First Thessalonians five eleven. Now let's say it again. 37 00:02:13.840 --> 00:02:19.000 Encourage each other and build each other up. First Thessalonians 38 00:02:19.280 --> 00:02:23.919 five eleven. Now this is this week's memory verse, so 39 00:02:24.360 --> 00:02:28.879 let's say it again together. Encourage each other and build 40 00:02:28.960 --> 00:02:33.319 each other up. First Thessalonians five eleven. Everybody look up 41 00:02:33.319 --> 00:02:36.759 here and don't look down. Now, encourage each other and 42 00:02:36.919 --> 00:02:41.960 build each other up. First Thessalonians five eleven. You memorize 43 00:02:41.960 --> 00:02:44.840 the Bible verse we peede, turn to somebody, say I 44 00:02:44.840 --> 00:02:48.599 did it, I did it. Okay, all right, one more time, 45 00:02:48.719 --> 00:02:53.560 First Thessalonians five eleven. Encourage each other and build each 46 00:02:53.599 --> 00:02:58.919 other up. First Thessalonians five eleven. Now that's what we're 47 00:02:58.919 --> 00:03:01.680 going to talk about how to do today. And I'm 48 00:03:01.800 --> 00:03:05.520 very excited about this message because when we talk about 49 00:03:05.520 --> 00:03:08.240 how we help each other grow, you can apply this, 50 00:03:08.360 --> 00:03:11.680 like last week's message, in so many different ways. You 51 00:03:11.680 --> 00:03:14.240 can use it to help your boyfriend grow, your girlfriend grow, 52 00:03:14.280 --> 00:03:16.639 your husband, your wife. You can use it to help 53 00:03:16.639 --> 00:03:19.000 your kids grow, the people you work with grow. You 54 00:03:19.039 --> 00:03:21.560 can use it in your small group how we help 55 00:03:21.599 --> 00:03:22.240 each other grow. 56 00:03:25.919 --> 00:03:29.080 You're listening to Pastor Rick's Daily Hope. Rick will be 57 00:03:29.159 --> 00:03:32.000 back in just a moment with the rest of today's lesson. 58 00:03:32.360 --> 00:03:35.479 You can sign up for Pastor Rick's free email devotional 59 00:03:35.680 --> 00:03:39.879 at pastorick dot com. That's pastorick dot com. 60 00:03:39.919 --> 00:03:44.199 What does it take to become more loving, live more peacefully, 61 00:03:44.759 --> 00:03:49.719 develop patience, have self control? Pastor Rick says. Throughout all 62 00:03:49.800 --> 00:03:52.639 the years he's been a pastor, the number one question 63 00:03:52.759 --> 00:03:56.719 he's been asked, is why can't I change? People want 64 00:03:56.759 --> 00:04:00.000 to change, but they're stuck. Maybe you feel that way. 65 00:04:01.120 --> 00:04:04.400 In his book God's Power to Change Your Life, Rick 66 00:04:04.520 --> 00:04:09.439 lays the groundwork for personal transformation, then offers biblical insights 67 00:04:09.479 --> 00:04:12.639 and simple steps for ten areas of growth that can 68 00:04:12.719 --> 00:04:15.560 take you from where you are to where you want 69 00:04:15.599 --> 00:04:18.480 to be. This book connects you with the power to 70 00:04:18.639 --> 00:04:21.920 actually make the changes you long to make. And as 71 00:04:21.959 --> 00:04:24.959 you apply the truth of God's word by the power 72 00:04:25.000 --> 00:04:29.160 of His Spirit, your life will change. You'll move out 73 00:04:29.160 --> 00:04:32.160 of your rid and get on track with God's wonderful 74 00:04:32.240 --> 00:04:35.399 purposes for your life. And today, when you give a 75 00:04:35.399 --> 00:04:38.040 gift to Daily Hope to help take the hope of 76 00:04:38.199 --> 00:04:41.800 Jesus to people everywhere, we'll send you a copy of 77 00:04:41.879 --> 00:04:45.160 God's Power to Change Your Life. Just go to Pastororrick 78 00:04:45.240 --> 00:04:48.000 dot com right now to get your copy, or you 79 00:04:48.040 --> 00:04:51.120 can call eight hundred and six hundred five zero zero 80 00:04:51.199 --> 00:04:55.160 four that's Pastorick dot com. Or call eight hundred six 81 00:04:55.279 --> 00:04:58.560 hundred five zero zero four and be sure to let 82 00:04:58.639 --> 00:05:01.360 us know which station you heard us on. Thank you 83 00:05:01.439 --> 00:05:04.759 so much for your support. There's only three days left 84 00:05:04.759 --> 00:05:06.639 to get this great resource, so. 85 00:05:06.720 --> 00:05:14.800 Don't wait, and now here's Pastor Rick Warren with the 86 00:05:14.959 --> 00:05:16.800 second half of today's lesson. 87 00:05:17.279 --> 00:05:21.000 I'm very excited about this message because when we talk 88 00:05:21.040 --> 00:05:24.079 about how we help each other grow, you can apply this, 89 00:05:24.199 --> 00:05:27.480 like last week's message, in so many different ways. You 90 00:05:27.519 --> 00:05:30.040 can use it to help your boyfriend grow, your girlfriend grow, 91 00:05:30.120 --> 00:05:32.439 your husband, your wife. You can use it to help 92 00:05:32.480 --> 00:05:34.800 your kids grow, the people you work with grow. You 93 00:05:34.839 --> 00:05:37.399 can use it in your small group how we help 94 00:05:37.439 --> 00:05:39.800 each other grow. Tom's going to talk about the next one, 95 00:05:40.879 --> 00:05:41.360 all right. 96 00:05:45.959 --> 00:05:48.439 The goal of forty days of Community is learn how 97 00:05:48.439 --> 00:05:50.000 to love, learn how to love each other. And one 98 00:05:50.040 --> 00:05:52.199 of the ways we do that is when we decide 99 00:05:52.199 --> 00:05:55.160 to help each other grow. And there's a lot of 100 00:05:55.199 --> 00:05:57.399 ways we can do that, but I think this first 101 00:05:57.399 --> 00:05:59.399 one may be one of the most powerful choices you 102 00:05:59.439 --> 00:06:01.639 and I can make each week, and that is the 103 00:06:01.720 --> 00:06:04.959 decision to love other people help them grow by affirming 104 00:06:05.319 --> 00:06:09.319 each other's worth. By affirming each other's worth, here's a 105 00:06:09.319 --> 00:06:11.199 little secret if you haven't figured this out. In life, 106 00:06:11.360 --> 00:06:15.519 everybody is looking for affirmation. Have you noticed that everybody 107 00:06:15.600 --> 00:06:18.720 is looking for affirmation and people will do almost anything 108 00:06:18.800 --> 00:06:21.160 to get it. If you don't believe that just watch 109 00:06:21.160 --> 00:06:23.720 some of the reality shows. Look at what people do 110 00:06:23.800 --> 00:06:26.839 to get on TV, to get affirmed, to get eat worms, 111 00:06:26.920 --> 00:06:30.079 do whatever just so people will applaud you. Pretty ridiculous 112 00:06:30.920 --> 00:06:33.759 when you and I affirm other people. We're doing some 113 00:06:33.879 --> 00:06:37.759 incredible things in this world. We are showing love. We're ministering. 114 00:06:37.759 --> 00:06:40.680 Like Jesus ministered, he affirmed people as he ministered. He's 115 00:06:40.680 --> 00:06:43.040 made a difference in this world. We're doing God's work 116 00:06:43.040 --> 00:06:45.879 in the world. We're representing God. If you haven't figured 117 00:06:45.879 --> 00:06:49.079 this out yet, God is an incredibly affirming and loving father, 118 00:06:49.319 --> 00:06:50.800 and we're showing the world a little bit more about 119 00:06:50.839 --> 00:06:54.439 what God is like. But here's the question, how how 120 00:06:54.439 --> 00:06:56.199 do I do this? How do I make the choice 121 00:06:56.199 --> 00:06:59.519 to affirm people in everyday life. Well, there's four ways 122 00:06:59.519 --> 00:07:01.319 you can do that there on the outline. Number one, 123 00:07:01.439 --> 00:07:05.639 you do it by showing acceptance with acceptance, by doing 124 00:07:05.639 --> 00:07:08.040 what the Bible says in Romans fifteen seven, when it 125 00:07:08.079 --> 00:07:13.199 says accept one another just as Christ accepted you, instead 126 00:07:13.199 --> 00:07:16.000 of choosing to snub people and belittle people and to 127 00:07:16.120 --> 00:07:18.160 mean people, which is an easy choice to make, especially 128 00:07:18.199 --> 00:07:19.959 if you're having a bad day. If I'm having a 129 00:07:20.000 --> 00:07:22.240 bad day, it's great to put other people down. You 130 00:07:22.240 --> 00:07:23.920 have a bad day too, that kind of a feeling. 131 00:07:24.360 --> 00:07:27.000 But when you make the choice instead to lift people up, 132 00:07:27.600 --> 00:07:30.360 you are making an incredible impact in their lives. It's 133 00:07:30.480 --> 00:07:33.360 easy to look down on people, it's easy to act 134 00:07:33.399 --> 00:07:35.240 like you're better than people, and there's a couple of 135 00:07:35.319 --> 00:07:38.399 facts that really make that easy in our world. Number One, 136 00:07:38.519 --> 00:07:41.240 we live in a sort of a put down world. 137 00:07:41.759 --> 00:07:44.360 People tend to put other people down. When I feel bad, 138 00:07:44.399 --> 00:07:46.560 I try to drag other people down to my level. 139 00:07:46.560 --> 00:07:49.560 There's that kind of feeling in life. Our culture teaches 140 00:07:49.639 --> 00:07:53.759 us to compare everything, rate everything, appearance, talent, income, so 141 00:07:53.800 --> 00:07:56.600 it's easy to put other people down. There's a second 142 00:07:56.680 --> 00:07:59.240 fact that keeps us sometimes from accepting people, and that 143 00:07:59.319 --> 00:08:01.720 is our tend to see that we all have this 144 00:08:01.800 --> 00:08:04.879 tendency to take our strength and project them on other 145 00:08:04.920 --> 00:08:07.480 people and notice how other people don't quite made up 146 00:08:07.480 --> 00:08:11.240 to our standards. For instance, I know that some of 147 00:08:11.240 --> 00:08:13.279 you are people who are on time all the time. 148 00:08:13.279 --> 00:08:15.839 You're just that kind of people. That's the way life 149 00:08:15.920 --> 00:08:18.319 is for you. And those other people like us who 150 00:08:18.360 --> 00:08:19.839 are not on time. You tend to sort of look 151 00:08:19.879 --> 00:08:21.720 down your nose at us. You come and you sit 152 00:08:21.759 --> 00:08:23.360 in the bleacher so you can watch the people come 153 00:08:23.360 --> 00:08:25.120 in late. It just makes you feel good about yourself. 154 00:08:25.439 --> 00:08:27.519 There's late late, late. Late just makes you feel good 155 00:08:27.879 --> 00:08:30.439 those other people that are late. We tend to project 156 00:08:30.480 --> 00:08:32.720 our strengths on other people forgetting that we have other 157 00:08:32.759 --> 00:08:34.039 weaknesses or some. 158 00:08:33.919 --> 00:08:34.440 Of you are. 159 00:08:35.279 --> 00:08:37.759 You're tidy people, I mean just everything's nice and clean. 160 00:08:37.879 --> 00:08:39.440 You sort of like to go into other people's house 161 00:08:39.519 --> 00:08:41.399 and just sort of notice. You don't say anything about it, 162 00:08:41.399 --> 00:08:43.960 but just I see that. See that, Yeah, I see that. 163 00:08:44.039 --> 00:08:47.279 It makes you feel better about yourself. Let me tell 164 00:08:47.279 --> 00:08:49.320 you a better way to feel better about yourself. Instead 165 00:08:49.320 --> 00:08:51.399 of doing it by putting other people down. One of 166 00:08:51.399 --> 00:08:53.360 the greatest ways to feel better about who you are 167 00:08:54.120 --> 00:08:56.799 is to lift other people up. It gives you a 168 00:08:56.960 --> 00:09:01.279 thrill like nothing else. The Bible says this verse is 169 00:09:01.360 --> 00:09:04.159 up on the screen in Romans fourteen ten. Why do 170 00:09:04.240 --> 00:09:08.200 you look down on another Christian? Remember each of us 171 00:09:08.240 --> 00:09:11.919 will stand personally before the judgment seat of God. The 172 00:09:11.960 --> 00:09:13.919 point of that verse is who am I? Who are 173 00:09:13.960 --> 00:09:17.320 you to look down on other believers? God made us, 174 00:09:17.639 --> 00:09:20.120 He is our father, he is our creator, and we're 175 00:09:20.159 --> 00:09:22.240 all going to stand before him, and we need to 176 00:09:22.279 --> 00:09:24.840 lift each other up rather than putting each other down. 177 00:09:25.039 --> 00:09:27.879 Truth of the matter, God is that God lifts us up, 178 00:09:28.120 --> 00:09:30.720 He affirms us. So who am I to put down 179 00:09:30.759 --> 00:09:33.720 somebody else? In fact, it is not God who puts 180 00:09:33.759 --> 00:09:36.879 us down. It's not God who accuses us. You know 181 00:09:36.919 --> 00:09:40.360 who the Bible says the accuser is. The accuser is Satan. 182 00:09:40.960 --> 00:09:43.080 So when I spend all my time putting other people down, 183 00:09:43.320 --> 00:09:45.919 I'm doing Satan's work for him. And he smiles at it. 184 00:09:45.960 --> 00:09:50.000 He enjoys that. Now, let's just make this sort of personal. 185 00:09:50.159 --> 00:09:52.799 We're talking about small groups during this time of looking 186 00:09:52.799 --> 00:09:55.559 at how we're better together. Who is it in your 187 00:09:55.639 --> 00:09:58.080 group that you have a sort of a hard time accepting? 188 00:09:58.759 --> 00:09:59.200 Who is it? 189 00:09:59.399 --> 00:10:01.360 Don't look at I'm just asking the question, who is 190 00:10:01.360 --> 00:10:04.759 it that you have a hard time accepting? Have you 191 00:10:04.799 --> 00:10:07.360 ever thought about this? God wants to use you in 192 00:10:07.440 --> 00:10:11.360 their lives to help them to grow. The fact that 193 00:10:11.399 --> 00:10:13.600 you have a hard time accepting them means you're different, 194 00:10:13.919 --> 00:10:15.639 And the fact that you're different means that you can 195 00:10:15.639 --> 00:10:16.559 help each other grow. 196 00:10:16.639 --> 00:10:17.240 They probably have a. 197 00:10:17.240 --> 00:10:20.120 Hard time accepting you too, because you're different. God wants 198 00:10:20.159 --> 00:10:23.840 to use you in their maturity. But it all starts 199 00:10:23.919 --> 00:10:28.679 with acceptance. You cannot I can't help somebody grow and 200 00:10:28.759 --> 00:10:31.559 reject them at the same time. You have to accept 201 00:10:31.600 --> 00:10:34.840 them like Jesus accepted us. In order to do that, 202 00:10:34.879 --> 00:10:37.440 you and I have to value the God given differences 203 00:10:37.480 --> 00:10:40.840 and uniqueness that we all have versus in your outline. 204 00:10:40.840 --> 00:10:43.679 But one Corinthian twelve six says God works through different 205 00:10:43.720 --> 00:10:46.440 people in different ways, and I am glad he does. 206 00:10:47.120 --> 00:10:50.799 I'm so thrilled he does. He's made us different. Now, 207 00:10:50.679 --> 00:10:54.240 how do you tell when you've accepted someone. Here's one 208 00:10:54.279 --> 00:10:57.039 of the tests. You stop insisting that they be just 209 00:10:57.240 --> 00:11:00.399 like you. You realize and rejoicing the fact that they're different. 210 00:11:00.559 --> 00:11:02.440 Truth of the matter is the world will be a 211 00:11:02.440 --> 00:11:04.919 boring place. Everybody was just like you. So God has 212 00:11:04.960 --> 00:11:07.080 made us in all different kinds of ways, to do 213 00:11:07.120 --> 00:11:09.440 all different kinds of things, so everything can get done 214 00:11:09.440 --> 00:11:12.080 in this world. And the goal of a small group, 215 00:11:12.159 --> 00:11:14.679 goal of a family, goal of any group is not 216 00:11:14.759 --> 00:11:17.320 to mold people into your image. God wants us to 217 00:11:17.320 --> 00:11:19.679 all be different, but to help people to discover who 218 00:11:19.720 --> 00:11:22.440 God made them to be. To tell people to recognize, 219 00:11:22.440 --> 00:11:25.840 to affirm their uniqueness, I don't know when the last 220 00:11:25.879 --> 00:11:27.480 time he looked at somebody and said, you know what, 221 00:11:27.559 --> 00:11:31.399 I've noticed you're good at this. Oh, I do this too. 222 00:11:31.399 --> 00:11:32.960 It's easy to look at somebody and say you're bad 223 00:11:33.000 --> 00:11:35.679 at that. That's lazy. Anybody can notice that. But when 224 00:11:35.679 --> 00:11:37.279 was the last time he put a little energy and 225 00:11:37.320 --> 00:11:39.159 effort into a relationship where you could look at somebody 226 00:11:39.159 --> 00:11:41.440 and say, now you are really. 227 00:11:41.159 --> 00:11:41.679 Good at that. 228 00:11:42.000 --> 00:11:44.759 You don't know the difference that will make in that 229 00:11:44.799 --> 00:11:48.360 person's life. Someone said that people are not like clay 230 00:11:48.399 --> 00:11:51.000 to be molded by us, but they're like gifts to 231 00:11:51.039 --> 00:11:54.200 be unfolded when you notice these incredible gifts are in 232 00:11:54.240 --> 00:11:54.960 people's lives. 233 00:11:55.519 --> 00:12:00.840 The second way is by showing attention. That's just acceptance, 234 00:12:00.879 --> 00:12:03.320 but attention. Now that takes more time than acceptance. You know, 235 00:12:03.519 --> 00:12:07.279 you can accept somebody and still ignore them, and I 236 00:12:07.320 --> 00:12:09.799 accept you just stay out of my life. And so 237 00:12:09.879 --> 00:12:12.320 you can disregard people, you can overlook them. And the 238 00:12:12.320 --> 00:12:17.240 Bible says in Galatians six' ten give special. Attention circle 239 00:12:17.279 --> 00:12:20.600 that give special attention to those who are in the 240 00:12:20.639 --> 00:12:23.080 family of. Believers now why do they get special? Attention 241 00:12:23.159 --> 00:12:25.080 it's one of the benefits of being in the family Of. 242 00:12:25.080 --> 00:12:27.039 God it's one of the benefits of being a part 243 00:12:27.080 --> 00:12:30.320 of a. Church you get special. Attention it's the flip 244 00:12:30.360 --> 00:12:31.960 side of what we looked at two weeks, ago where 245 00:12:31.960 --> 00:12:35.200 it said pay attention to those outside the. Family but 246 00:12:35.240 --> 00:12:38.320 this says give special attentions to those who are believers 247 00:12:38.320 --> 00:12:40.679 in the family Of. God why because here's the general. 248 00:12:40.720 --> 00:12:44.559 Principle whatever you pay attention to is going to. Grow 249 00:12:45.399 --> 00:12:47.759 IF i pay attention to my, garden it's going to. 250 00:12:47.840 --> 00:12:50.919 Grow IF i pay attention to my, kids they're going to. 251 00:12:50.960 --> 00:12:54.120 Grow IF i pay attention to my, marriage it's going 252 00:12:54.200 --> 00:12:56.879 to grow and get. Better IF i pay attention to my, 253 00:12:57.000 --> 00:12:59.679 work that's going to. Grow the only principle where this 254 00:12:59.720 --> 00:13:04.960 doesn't work is my. Hair the more ATTENTION i pay to, 255 00:13:05.000 --> 00:13:09.039 it the more it falls. Out, now what is the 256 00:13:09.080 --> 00:13:14.399 greatest gift of? Love, well it's not, diamonds and it's not, 257 00:13:14.519 --> 00:13:17.879 flowers and it's not. Chocolate the greatest gift of love 258 00:13:17.919 --> 00:13:24.039 you can give is focused. Attention focused. Attention you, know 259 00:13:24.120 --> 00:13:26.240 you can affirm people just by looking them in the. 260 00:13:26.279 --> 00:13:28.919 Eye and just by looking them in the, eye you're 261 00:13:28.960 --> 00:13:31.320 SAYING i value. You what you have to say is 262 00:13:31.360 --> 00:13:34.440 important to me because you matter to. Me and what 263 00:13:34.519 --> 00:13:38.399 people want more than anything else is focused. Attention they 264 00:13:38.440 --> 00:13:41.399 want to know that their thoughts, matter that their lives, 265 00:13:41.480 --> 00:13:43.759 matter that they are. Valuable you're not just watching THE 266 00:13:43.840 --> 00:13:46.159 tv or reading the paper while you're listening to. Them 267 00:13:46.159 --> 00:13:50.919 you are focusing on. Them god pays attention to. You he, 268 00:13:50.960 --> 00:13:53.360 says even the hairs on your head are. Numbered And 269 00:13:53.480 --> 00:13:57.399 jesus said that the essence of relationships is not what 270 00:13:57.440 --> 00:14:00.559 we do for each. Other and the essence of relationationships 271 00:14:00.639 --> 00:14:02.960 is not even what we give to each other provide 272 00:14:03.000 --> 00:14:06.159 for each. Other the essence of relationships is how much 273 00:14:06.200 --> 00:14:12.039 of ourselves we give to each other focused. Attention, now 274 00:14:12.080 --> 00:14:14.559 a lot of guys we just don't get. THIS i 275 00:14:14.600 --> 00:14:16.360 can't tell you how many Men i've talked to who, 276 00:14:16.399 --> 00:14:21.159 SAID i don't understand. IT i provide everything my family. 277 00:14:21.240 --> 00:14:24.840 NEEDS i give my wife everything she. NEEDS i provide 278 00:14:24.840 --> 00:14:28.559 my kids with everything. Needs what more do they? Want 279 00:14:29.960 --> 00:14:34.679 they want? You they want, You they want your, Time 280 00:14:35.360 --> 00:14:39.200 they want your, attention they want your. Focus they want 281 00:14:39.240 --> 00:14:43.159 to know that you think they, matter and so they 282 00:14:43.200 --> 00:14:46.519 need time with. You and nothing can compensate for. Time 283 00:14:46.639 --> 00:14:50.759 kids don't need. Things they need. Parents they need, time 284 00:14:51.039 --> 00:14:54.960 and marriages need, time and friendships need, time and groups need. Time, 285 00:14:56.879 --> 00:14:58.720 now one of the greatest things that keeps us from 286 00:14:58.799 --> 00:15:04.559 doing this is televis And. Internet the Average american now 287 00:15:04.600 --> 00:15:07.360 WATCHES tv and our works are plays on their computer 288 00:15:07.639 --> 00:15:11.639 five to six hours a. Day that's over thirty hours a. 289 00:15:11.639 --> 00:15:15.240 Week that's one, thousand five hundred and sixty hours a. Year, 290 00:15:16.120 --> 00:15:18.919 now fifteen hundred and sixty hours is the equivalent of 291 00:15:18.960 --> 00:15:23.960 spending ninety seven days straight at sixteen hours a day 292 00:15:24.240 --> 00:15:27.120 doing nothing but sitting in front of the television of the. Computer, 293 00:15:28.519 --> 00:15:31.120 well it's no wonder we don't have time for. Relationships 294 00:15:31.159 --> 00:15:33.519 it always amazed me When friends was. ON i guess 295 00:15:33.519 --> 00:15:36.120 it's still on in. Syndication but When friends, on people 296 00:15:36.120 --> 00:15:40.519 would rather Watch friends than make, friends and they would 297 00:15:41.039 --> 00:15:44.360 religiously spend an hour every night watching the. Reruns but 298 00:15:44.399 --> 00:15:46.679 they wouldn't think of spending an hour every night making a. 299 00:15:46.720 --> 00:15:49.960 Friend they'd rather watch somebody else live a fake life 300 00:15:50.000 --> 00:15:55.080 than them live a real. Life, now knowing that this 301 00:15:55.240 --> 00:15:57.799 Is Orange, COUNTY i would be able to say that 302 00:15:58.000 --> 00:16:00.159 most of you sitting here and in our, venue who 303 00:16:01.240 --> 00:16:06.200 are in time starved, relationships you are you're in a 304 00:16:06.240 --> 00:16:10.440 time starved. Relationship as a book came out years ago 305 00:16:10.519 --> 00:16:13.840 called A starving For. Attention it was about our. Anorexia 306 00:16:13.960 --> 00:16:18.600 but most relationships are starving for. Attention so let me 307 00:16:18.639 --> 00:16:22.320 ask you who do you tend to? Overlook it's often 308 00:16:22.360 --> 00:16:25.799 the people closest to. You who do you tend to? 309 00:16:25.879 --> 00:16:29.080 Overlook do you overlook the receptionists at? Work do you 310 00:16:29.120 --> 00:16:32.200 overlook the secretary? There do you overlook the male person 311 00:16:32.440 --> 00:16:34.440 who is the person that's in your life all the, 312 00:16:34.480 --> 00:16:37.840 time but you just don't see them because you're too 313 00:16:37.879 --> 00:16:40.679 busy doing something. Else here's WHAT i want you to 314 00:16:40.720 --> 00:16:43.320 do this. WEEK i want you to look for opportunities 315 00:16:44.000 --> 00:16:47.840 to show attention to the people in your. Life to pay. 316 00:16:48.000 --> 00:16:51.120 Attention that is the greatest gift of love you can give, 317 00:16:51.159 --> 00:16:52.960 them and don't just wait for it to. Happen make 318 00:16:53.039 --> 00:16:57.039 opportunities to show. Attention and THEN i want you to 319 00:16:57.080 --> 00:17:01.440 schedule time this week with both your group and your 320 00:17:01.440 --> 00:17:04.400 family because you need both of them in your life to. 321 00:17:04.519 --> 00:17:08.519 Grow they're essential to growth because we need acceptance and 322 00:17:08.559 --> 00:17:11.759 we need. Attention, now here's the third practical way that 323 00:17:11.839 --> 00:17:14.920 you can help people. Grow your, husband your, wife your, boyfriend, 324 00:17:14.920 --> 00:17:22.039 anybody you help them grow by showing, affection. Affection i'm 325 00:17:22.079 --> 00:17:27.680 talking about physical. Touch. Now you, know we've all read 326 00:17:27.720 --> 00:17:31.599 about babies and the failure to thrive. Syndrome that means 327 00:17:31.599 --> 00:17:35.079 that little, infants if they are not, stroked if they're not, 328 00:17:35.279 --> 00:17:38.799 caressed if they're not, touched as they grow, up they don't, 329 00:17:38.839 --> 00:17:42.640 Develop they don't grow the way That god intended for 330 00:17:42.680 --> 00:17:45.200 them to. Grow babies have to be. TOUCHED i think 331 00:17:45.200 --> 00:17:48.240 that's WHY i made them so, soft because you want 332 00:17:48.279 --> 00:17:50.240 to touch. Them you, know you want to nuzzle, them 333 00:17:50.240 --> 00:17:52.640 you want to hold them, close and they need that 334 00:17:52.759 --> 00:17:57.279 stimulation of skin in order to grow and. Develop, now 335 00:17:57.319 --> 00:17:59.279 most people know that it's called the failure to thrive. 336 00:17:59.400 --> 00:18:02.559 Syndrome what most people don't know is adults need it. 337 00:18:02.680 --> 00:18:07.440 TOO ucla to the study a while back and discovered 338 00:18:07.559 --> 00:18:13.279 that to be a, healthy, fulfilled satisfied, adult you need 339 00:18:13.519 --> 00:18:19.440 eight to ten meaningful touches every. Day said, Boy i'm getting. 340 00:18:19.480 --> 00:18:25.960 Cheated you do, handshakes, hugs pat on the bat, back 341 00:18:26.000 --> 00:18:31.519 a little. Squeeze you were made for being. Touched whether 342 00:18:31.559 --> 00:18:34.440 you ever marry or, not whether you ever have sex or, 343 00:18:34.480 --> 00:18:39.440 not you need touches in your life in order to 344 00:18:39.480 --> 00:18:41.039 grow and to be all That god wants you to. 345 00:18:41.079 --> 00:18:44.279 Be and YET i talk to a lot of people 346 00:18:44.519 --> 00:18:46.759 sometimes on the patty who, say you, Know, rick the 347 00:18:46.799 --> 00:18:50.200 only physical AFFECTION i get all week is at, church 348 00:18:50.880 --> 00:18:53.039 when you, say turn around and hug, somebody or turn 349 00:18:53.079 --> 00:18:55.559 around and shake hands with, somebody or give somebody a 350 00:18:55.599 --> 00:18:57.880 pat on? Them he, Said are they say that's ALL 351 00:18:57.880 --> 00:19:01.240 i get all Week When i'm out on the patio 352 00:19:01.240 --> 00:19:03.519 AND i hug somebody off in, wonder how long does 353 00:19:03.559 --> 00:19:07.160 that hug have to last that? Person most of you, 354 00:19:07.200 --> 00:19:09.599 Know i'm pretty famous for, hugging because if you get 355 00:19:09.640 --> 00:19:13.680 in my, way you're gonna get. Hugged and that's WHY 356 00:19:13.839 --> 00:19:18.519 i know why some of you leave, early because you're. Chicken, 357 00:19:19.240 --> 00:19:21.640 OKAY i see you up there in the bleachers your last. 358 00:19:21.640 --> 00:19:23.640 Song you side out because you Think i'll get out 359 00:19:23.680 --> 00:19:26.720 Before rick gets out. Here but you can, run you can't. 360 00:19:26.799 --> 00:19:28.359 Hide i'm gonna get. 361 00:19:28.359 --> 00:19:28.440 You. 362 00:19:28.480 --> 00:19:34.680 Eventually you're gonna get. Hugged everybody stand up right? Now, 363 00:19:34.720 --> 00:19:39.440 oh he, said oh, no, everybody stand. Up come, on stand. Up, 364 00:19:40.160 --> 00:19:44.720 okay stretch, everybody, stretch go, ahead, Stretch, okay touch your, 365 00:19:44.759 --> 00:19:51.440 toes touch your neighbor's. Toes, OKAY i want you to turn, 366 00:19:51.440 --> 00:19:54.559 around AND i want you to hug a total. Stranger go, 367 00:19:54.559 --> 00:20:08.559 ahead turn, around hug a total. Stranger all, right all, 368 00:20:08.640 --> 00:20:17.160 right sit, down, okay sit down. Now NOW i know 369 00:20:17.319 --> 00:20:19.680 that there were two reactions to what we just. Did 370 00:20:21.400 --> 00:20:23.680 some of you are, Thinking i'm never going back to 371 00:20:23.720 --> 00:20:28.880 that church, again and the smarter ones are, thinking next, 372 00:20:28.960 --> 00:20:33.920 Week i'm sitting by somebody. Cute, Okay So Pastor, rick 373 00:20:34.079 --> 00:20:39.599 do it again next week And i'll be ready next. Time. Okay, 374 00:20:40.160 --> 00:20:44.440 Oh Brother roman's twelfth. Ten let's read it aloud, together 375 00:20:44.920 --> 00:20:50.480 love one another with brotherly affection as members of one. Family, 376 00:20:50.680 --> 00:20:53.559 hey we're. Family we're all in the family Of. God 377 00:20:53.799 --> 00:20:57.039 you're my, sister you're my. Brother brothers and sisters show 378 00:20:57.079 --> 00:21:00.440 affection to each. Other you got to show, what not 379 00:21:00.559 --> 00:21:02.680 just say. It it's not just enough to tell people 380 00:21:02.960 --> 00:21:05.000 or say you love. Them they need to feel. 381 00:21:05.039 --> 00:21:16.319 It this Is Pastor Rick's Daily. Hope we're so happy 382 00:21:16.359 --> 00:21:19.480 you've chosen to study along with us. Today if you'd 383 00:21:19.519 --> 00:21:23.440 like to receive hope and encouragement every, day delivered right 384 00:21:23.519 --> 00:21:26.799 to your, inbox then sign up For rick's free daily 385 00:21:26.839 --> 00:21:30.960 devotional by going To pastororick dot com right. Now rick 386 00:21:31.039 --> 00:21:33.480 will be back to close out our time. Today but, 387 00:21:33.680 --> 00:21:38.519 first what does it take to become more, loving live more, 388 00:21:38.559 --> 00:21:44.119 peacefully develop patients have self? Control in his Book God's 389 00:21:44.160 --> 00:21:48.039 power To Change Your, Life rick lays the groundwork for personal, 390 00:21:48.119 --> 00:21:53.039 transformation then offers biblical insights and simple steps for ten 391 00:21:53.119 --> 00:21:56.079 areas of growth that you can take from where you 392 00:21:56.200 --> 00:21:59.720 are to where you want to. Be Here's Pastor rick 393 00:21:59.799 --> 00:22:00.440 to tell you. 394 00:22:00.480 --> 00:22:03.240 More you, Know i've been a pastor for over three, 395 00:22:03.359 --> 00:22:05.640 decades And i've been teaching The word Of god for 396 00:22:05.720 --> 00:22:09.279 over four. Decades and in all of that, time the 397 00:22:09.400 --> 00:22:12.160 number one Question i've been asked by people is, this 398 00:22:13.039 --> 00:22:17.240 how CAN i? Change or why CAN'T i? Change i've 399 00:22:17.279 --> 00:22:20.680 talked to literally thousands and thousands of people who want 400 00:22:20.680 --> 00:22:24.640 to change but are just stuck and they can't figure 401 00:22:24.680 --> 00:22:27.640