WEBVTT

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<v Speaker 1>It's time for our nine news nuggets.

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<v Speaker 2>You need to know stories that kind of fell through

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<v Speaker 2>the cracks, because you know there's a lot else, a

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<v Speaker 2>lot of other stuff going on.

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<v Speaker 3>I totally ps still picture Renee on that lounge in

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<v Speaker 3>some sort of kaftan with a cocktail.

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<v Speaker 1>For martiniz Deep. Yes, here's our Honorable Mention.

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<v Speaker 2>Honorable Mention not supposed to mention when.

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<v Speaker 1>Men, it's been an honor serving with you.

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<v Speaker 3>A.

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<v Speaker 2>Great and honorable most is So today we're holding auditions

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<v Speaker 2>to become the newest member of Honorable Mention. And it

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<v Speaker 2>almost feels like any time you sign up for a

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<v Speaker 2>big festival slash events, burning Man, fire Festival, something, it's

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<v Speaker 2>going to end up underwhelming.

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<v Speaker 1>In this case, did.

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<v Speaker 3>The fire Festival of book talk?

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<v Speaker 2>In this case, people traveled to Baltimore thousands of dollars,

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<v Speaker 2>some of them paid for an event advertised as a

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<v Speaker 2>romantic book convention.

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<v Speaker 3>Who do you think is going to show up at this?

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<v Speaker 3>What are you expecting? Are you expecting this to be

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<v Speaker 3>like when all of the Hunger Games fans descended on

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<v Speaker 3>La Live to you know what I mean? Like where

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<v Speaker 3>you're with a bunch of like minded people and you

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<v Speaker 3>can talk about the fans stuff and all of that,

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<v Speaker 3>because when I think of romantic fantasy books, those are books.

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<v Speaker 3>It's kind of like when I went to go see

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<v Speaker 3>Fifty Shades of Gray in the movie theater, like in

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<v Speaker 3>the middle of the day before anchoring the John and

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<v Speaker 3>Ken show. The whole thing, that whole sentence should be flushed,

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<v Speaker 3>but it happened, and I thought to myself, why am

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<v Speaker 3>I watching this movie? This like softcore porn with strangers

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<v Speaker 3>in Burbank at ten am.

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<v Speaker 2>Out of the day, right, just at least wait until

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<v Speaker 2>after four, you know.

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<v Speaker 3>I mean, I understand some sort of like fan groups

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<v Speaker 3>where you'd want to be the Star Wars or whatever.

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<v Speaker 3>But when you're talking about romance, do you really want

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<v Speaker 3>to be with a bunch of other people read the

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<v Speaker 3>same sex scenes that you did? I don't know, Maybe

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<v Speaker 3>you do.

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<v Speaker 1>Maybe you do.

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<v Speaker 2>In this case, very few people showed up. These were

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<v Speaker 2>mostly books sellers, like authors that were self publishing these

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<v Speaker 2>romanticy books, and they said that they had very few customers,

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<v Speaker 2>so they were upset.

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<v Speaker 3>Number nine.

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<v Speaker 1>Number nine I did n.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, oh my goodness, you get spicy languages. I feel

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<v Speaker 3>scared for her unborn children in there, Oh.

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<v Speaker 2>My gosh, guy in Chicago, owner of a South Side

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<v Speaker 2>property on the market to be sold. But when one

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<v Speaker 2>of the realtors walked by, there were already people inside

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<v Speaker 2>and Marco Alaskaz, the owner, could not figure out how

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<v Speaker 2>Chermaine and Cadoro moved in, claiming that they had recently

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<v Speaker 2>purchased the property. They were squatters taking advantage of this thing,

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<v Speaker 2>he said. The couple showed him, at least showed the

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<v Speaker 2>police a mortgage document. Cook County, of course, confirmed they

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<v Speaker 2>did not have any sort of mortgage on record, so

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<v Speaker 2>they were squatters trying to take over this thing.

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<v Speaker 1>So what did Marco do? He moved in with.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm just gonna say, Chermaine and Cordero sound like a

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<v Speaker 3>good time, Marco, You'll go through life with Schermain and

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<v Speaker 3>Cadero is your name and not be fun. You just don't.

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<v Speaker 3>Does anybody know a mean or a difficult Chermain.

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<v Speaker 2>Marco called a couple of friends and they moved in

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<v Speaker 2>basically and stayed the night with the squatters. We stayed

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<v Speaker 2>in the living room watching the door. They stayed in

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<v Speaker 2>one of the bedrooms. We stayed the whole night. The

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<v Speaker 2>next morning he realized that Chrmaine and Cardero were not

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<v Speaker 2>going to move, and he's they told him, we want

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<v Speaker 2>eight grand of what.

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<v Speaker 1>We paid so we can leave your property.

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<v Speaker 2>They eventually signed a cash for key agreement as common

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<v Speaker 2>as it is, and paid them forty three hundred dollars.

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<v Speaker 3>To Waters are so emboldened these days and with the

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<v Speaker 3>law behind them in many cases. Number number eight, or

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<v Speaker 3>as Keanu would say.

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<v Speaker 1>Our client is bold.

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<v Speaker 3>Every eight second listening to eight different bosses drawn on

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<v Speaker 3>about mission statements.

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<v Speaker 1>He.

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<v Speaker 3>Sometimes we fall on hard times, Okay, Sometimes we don't

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<v Speaker 3>have all the money we need to buy our drugs.

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<v Speaker 3>Sometimes we have to borrow the drugs, and then sometimes

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<v Speaker 3>we can't pay the money back for the drugs. So

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<v Speaker 3>in those cases, sometimes an eight hundred pound rare historic

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<v Speaker 3>cannon presents itself and you swipe it, and you swipe it,

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<v Speaker 3>and you bring it to your dealer and you're like, hey,

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<v Speaker 3>I've got this piece of war history from Kansas. Can

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<v Speaker 3>I give you this concrete cannon in exchange for wiping

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<v Speaker 3>out my drug? It seems plausible to me. Hey, you've

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<v Speaker 3>been up for four weeks.

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<v Speaker 2>Here's the most implausible, the most implausible thing you said,

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<v Speaker 2>concrete cannon.

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<v Speaker 3>I would assume it's concrete.

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<v Speaker 1>No, No, it's metal. He's selling the metal for scrap.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh he's not selling it for historical value.

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<v Speaker 1>No, no, that's why I pieced it. That's why.

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<v Speaker 2>The most unlikely aspect of this story is the guy's

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<v Speaker 2>name is Gordon Pierce the Third. Do you know anybody

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<v Speaker 2>with the third after their name that owes a cocaine

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<v Speaker 2>dealer a lot of money?

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<v Speaker 3>No, because they have enough money to pay their dealers.

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<v Speaker 1>It's the third.

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<v Speaker 3>Do you know anybody named the third who doesn't do cocaine? No?

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, my brother in law. Oh he's a third.

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<v Speaker 3>You don't know him that well, Brocaine?

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<v Speaker 1>Seven years of college, don't it?

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<v Speaker 3>Seven seven seven seven days?

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<v Speaker 1>This sounds like a Cheech and Chong movie.

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<v Speaker 2>It does twenty five thousand people who live in I'm

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<v Speaker 2>gonna pronounce it wrong. Lice, a town in Turkey, involuntarily

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<v Speaker 2>got high after their police force burned tens of tons

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<v Speaker 2>of seized cannabis in the center of the town. This

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<v Speaker 2>the whole thing was to burn over twenty tons of

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<v Speaker 2>confiscated cannabis. That, of course, caused the air in the

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<v Speaker 2>town to become thick with the weed. Smoke people for

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<v Speaker 2>five days. People couldn't leave their windows open and had

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<v Speaker 2>to avoid going out.

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<v Speaker 3>Why would they waste all that pot?

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<v Speaker 4>Because it's not legal in Turkey, so it's legal other places.

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<v Speaker 4>You sell it to the other places where it's legal.

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<v Speaker 4>Just export it or just sell it in the black market.

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<v Speaker 4>No need to burn it, waste not, want not.

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<v Speaker 1>Here's number six. I got six, you got six? Give six,

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<v Speaker 1>number six. There's six more weeks of water?

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<v Speaker 3>What you picture of me?

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<v Speaker 1>A rabbi and six drunk and longshomny We just dig

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<v Speaker 1>you in a nursing home. Closure to ask. I don't

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<v Speaker 1>have to.

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<v Speaker 3>Drink another So TikTok's latest trend has students setting their

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<v Speaker 3>chrome books on fire. As you can imagine, this has

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<v Speaker 3>resulted in school evacuations safety warnings across the country. It's

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<v Speaker 3>known as the chrome book challenge. What a rich kid thing,

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<v Speaker 3>well a rich school thing definitely had. So many schools

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<v Speaker 3>now use chromebooks and hand them out to the kids.

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<v Speaker 1>Wow that if you if.

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<v Speaker 2>You give a kid something that is that valuable without

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<v Speaker 2>them having any idea of how valuable it is, they're

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<v Speaker 2>going to blow it up because they're dumb.

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<v Speaker 1>We're all dumb. We all did stupid stuff like that.

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<v Speaker 3>Remember yesterday when the fire department was here and I said,

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<v Speaker 3>is it finally on fire? And they just looked at me.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, And they took your picture without you knowing, and

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<v Speaker 2>they're going to keep it on file. So anytime there

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<v Speaker 2>is an arson or suspicious fire anywhere within a twenty

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<v Speaker 2>block radius of this place, they're going to be calling.

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<v Speaker 3>The calling what the fire department.

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<v Speaker 1>No, they're going to be calling the movie that's white bro.

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<v Speaker 3>The fire department rarely rats you out to the cops.

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<v Speaker 3>It's a little fun fact.

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<v Speaker 1>They could call me, I would write you out.

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<v Speaker 3>Well, yeah, you would rat out a freaking ham sandwich.

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<v Speaker 3>You see. John got a ham sandwich from Jersey Mikes.

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<v Speaker 3>I love Jersey Mikes. And you know how when your

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<v Speaker 3>kids were little and you'd make them a sandwich and

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<v Speaker 3>you'd put one piece of bologney in there because that

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<v Speaker 3>was that's how they like their sandwich. Right, Sure, you wouldn't.

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<v Speaker 3>You wouldn't make like a Deli sandwich for them and

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<v Speaker 3>put a bunch of meat in.

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<v Speaker 1>There, fold up the meat, right Yeah, No, no.

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<v Speaker 3>You wouldn't do that because they're five. John also takes

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<v Speaker 3>out all of the meat of this sandwich and just

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<v Speaker 3>has like a couple slices in there of ham.

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<v Speaker 1>Like you tell them they're making it that you don't

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<v Speaker 1>want that much.

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<v Speaker 3>Here, because then you'd have to be embarrassed in front

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<v Speaker 3>of everyone in line of the Jersey Mike's But he

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<v Speaker 3>took all the ham out. He had like just a

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<v Speaker 3>couple of slices of ham in there. I said, what's

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<v Speaker 3>going on with all that ham? So I don't like

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<v Speaker 3>a lot of ham on my sandwich. It looked perfectly good.

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<v Speaker 3>I almost eat the ham, to be honest, but I'm

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<v Speaker 3>full I would have eaten that ham.

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<v Speaker 1>What color was the hand?

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<v Speaker 4>It was?

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<v Speaker 3>That's white, bro It was a beautiful shade of ham.

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<v Speaker 1>It's number five is not a color. We begin bombing

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<v Speaker 1>in five minutes. Five, little monee, this is the year

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<v Speaker 1>five point five. Five would me a favorite? Loose five

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<v Speaker 1>pounds immediately.

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<v Speaker 3>And it's thin slice too.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh that's good.

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<v Speaker 3>I love a thin sliced piece of ham.

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<v Speaker 2>Man known to throw cans of food and other items

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<v Speaker 2>around a Florida neighborhood in Port Charlotte, has been arrested

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<v Speaker 2>and neighbor said he threw canned corn through her window.

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<v Speaker 2>She was outside when she heard the sound of glass breaking,

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<v Speaker 2>turned toward the noise and found that one of her neighbors,

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<v Speaker 2>a guy named Erez Centerville, was running into another neighbor's

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<v Speaker 2>yard and back toward his home. The front window in

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<v Speaker 2>her house else was broken at the top and something

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<v Speaker 2>had been thrown through.

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<v Speaker 3>Here's the thing. It wasn't just the Delmanti can of corn.

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<v Speaker 3>This person also threw a bottle of urine. Oh, which

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<v Speaker 3>it's hard to explain, isn't it.

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<v Speaker 2>Bottles of urine, glass plates, chunks of metal, and raw meat.

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<v Speaker 2>It's a good thing he doesn't he doesn't come here

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<v Speaker 2>ham apparently laying out in the desk.

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<v Speaker 3>Or remember that challenge of throwing cheese at each other's faces.

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<v Speaker 3>I should have done that with the ham. I should

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<v Speaker 3>have come in here with John's ham and just thrown

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<v Speaker 3>it at your face.

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<v Speaker 1>Idea, here's number four. More minute. It's probably on his

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<v Speaker 1>fourth tranquilizer by now number four.

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<v Speaker 3>This isn't the same world he left four years ago. Oh,

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<v Speaker 3>this is awful. So everybody knows. Well, let's not go

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<v Speaker 3>down that road. There was a mom who suffered a

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<v Speaker 3>ridiculously horrific allergic reaction living in an apartment that had

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<v Speaker 3>molded in it. We all have been victim to mold

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<v Speaker 3>in various parts, right, I.

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<v Speaker 1>Mean, we could do it like this if you want.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh, I'm sorry, Oh let's do it.

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<v Speaker 1>I apologize mold, Joanna Hayes.

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<v Speaker 3>I could stop right there and it will just be

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<v Speaker 3>at tease.

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<v Speaker 1>No, it's too late.

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<v Speaker 2>They said that this rash that that this mom and

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<v Speaker 2>her daughter suffered was because of the state of their house.

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<v Speaker 3>The mushrooms in the mold. Did you see the rashes.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, black spores and the mushrooms.

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<v Speaker 1>Look at that. Look at the mold that's growing in there,

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<v Speaker 1>and they can't figure it out.

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<v Speaker 3>I knew this would further inflame your distaste of mushrooms.

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<v Speaker 3>And it has number three.

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<v Speaker 2>Sorry, we shall be the number count and the number

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<v Speaker 2>of the counting shall be three.

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<v Speaker 1>Were dead within three hours.

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<v Speaker 2>Three security clearance level three.

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<v Speaker 1>All three of three. I got all three of you guys,

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<v Speaker 1>for the rest of your name born live. After about

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<v Speaker 1>three days, they both started to stink.

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<v Speaker 2>Guy set his house on fire Northumberland in UK, A

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<v Speaker 2>guy named James Brown, but different James Brown was more

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<v Speaker 2>captivated captivated by firefighters than by the flames themselves.

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<v Speaker 3>James Brown is dead.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, not this one. This one's only twenty six years old.

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<v Speaker 2>A lot of people dream of becoming firefighters, so he h.

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<v Speaker 2>Let's say, I don't know why he was fascinated with firefighters.

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, I've seen some pretty shapely firefighters in my day.

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<v Speaker 2>Wa maybe that's what he was doing. Back in September,

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<v Speaker 2>there got a call emergency services. Saw sparks from an

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<v Speaker 2>energy meter burning linen in a cabinet. They extinguished a

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<v Speaker 2>little fire, and they even turned off the electricity supply

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<v Speaker 2>just to be safe. About ninety minutes later, he reported

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<v Speaker 2>yet another in fire, another fire that involved betting, but

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<v Speaker 2>this time the electricity had already been turned off. The

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<v Speaker 2>firefighters began to investigate and realized this guy was setting

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<v Speaker 2>things on fire with fireworks.

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<v Speaker 1>Here's number two. What's going on you?

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<v Speaker 3>Two? One? Two?

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<v Speaker 1>There's two sons and no women.

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<v Speaker 2>You see the picture of the raccoon with a meth pipe.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I feel like this is much ado about nothing.

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<v Speaker 3>I mean, raccoons get into everything, and why anybody would

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<v Speaker 3>be held accountable for a raccoon who picks up a

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<v Speaker 3>meth pipe is beyond me.

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<v Speaker 2>I feel like raccoons are already pretty high strung.

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<v Speaker 3>Right, They're gonna do what they're gonna do. They do

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<v Speaker 3>not need meth, they don't need method They can't be controlled.

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<v Speaker 2>But there is there is a picture cops took of

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<v Speaker 2>a driver's seat when they stopped a woman and been

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<v Speaker 2>arrested for for drug paraphernalia. This raccoon that they are

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<v Speaker 2>calling chewy because now you can see him with this crackpipe.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, he was holding a meth pipe and she has

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<v Speaker 3>been arrested.

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<v Speaker 2>Well for the drugs, not for having a raccoon with

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<v Speaker 2>a meth pipe, I hope not. Here's number one weird

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<v Speaker 2>number one?

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<v Speaker 1>Number one were number one?

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<v Speaker 3>Ben?

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<v Speaker 1>I decided to look out for number one? Are you

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<v Speaker 1>the number one row?

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<v Speaker 3>Number one? This is a nice animal. It doesn't involve

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<v Speaker 3>meth at all. No.

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<v Speaker 2>There was a big gray draft horse named Arthur a

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<v Speaker 2>few years ago was spooked by a guy yelling and

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<v Speaker 2>opening an umbrella in Central Park and he ran off

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<v Speaker 2>and he crashed into a couple of cars while towing

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<v Speaker 2>Three tourists in the carriage crashed into a couple of

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<v Speaker 2>parked cars. Passengers had minor injuries. The carriage was crumpled

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<v Speaker 2>the cars had significant damage. Arthur the horse became something

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<v Speaker 2>of a poster boy for Animal Act at a poster pony.

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<v Speaker 2>But he has been living out his days at a

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<v Speaker 2>horse sanctuary in Massachusetts. So they didn't put him down, thankfully.

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<v Speaker 2>And I don't know what color of horse he was.

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<v Speaker 3>That's white broo. Okay, all right, that can die with

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<v Speaker 3>excess face right. No, we're gonna kill those things over

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<v Speaker 3>the weekend. You know, that's not how they bury them.

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<v Speaker 3>It's not how this show works.

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<v Speaker 2>Reminder our news and Bruises coming up in Lancaster, a

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<v Speaker 2>bravery brewing to kick off Memorial Day weekend Friday the

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<v Speaker 2>twenty third, doing the whole show out there coming.

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<v Speaker 3>How come you don't say stupid things? I do.

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<v Speaker 2>I just say them quietly, and I sometimes you're not

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<v Speaker 2>paying attention to when I say them.

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<v Speaker 3>Me. I'm always listening. What John Cobalt show coming up next?

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<v Speaker 3>We will see you on Monday.

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<v Speaker 1>Stay drive.

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<v Speaker 3>We didn't even do the thing?

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<v Speaker 1>What thing?

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<v Speaker 3>The thing?

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<v Speaker 1>We will? Okay? Yeah, stay dry, everybody.

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<v Speaker 3>Blessings