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<v Speaker 1>Welcome to Spotlight Advanced. I'm Megan no Lett.

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<v Speaker 2>And I'm Andrew Davis. Spotlight uses a special English method

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<v Speaker 2>of broadcasting. It is easier for people to understand no

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<v Speaker 2>matter where in the world they live.

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<v Speaker 1>Do you know how your parents first met? Do you

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<v Speaker 1>know what happened before they got married? What did your

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<v Speaker 1>grandparents do to get to know each other before they

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<v Speaker 1>got married? How have you looked for a husband or wife?

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<v Speaker 1>Today's spotlight is on courtship the many different ways men

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<v Speaker 1>and women find a husband or wife.

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<v Speaker 2>Courtship is an name for the process of finding and

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<v Speaker 2>getting to know someone that you will marry. Today, many

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<v Speaker 2>people do this through dating, but not in every culture.

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<v Speaker 2>Courtship happens differently in cultures around the world, and courtship

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<v Speaker 2>today often is very different from courtship hundreds of years ago.

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<v Speaker 2>Let's look at some of the different ways people find love.

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<v Speaker 1>In ancient times, many marriages started when men from one

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<v Speaker 1>group or tribe would steal a woman from another tribe.

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<v Speaker 1>The woman would then be forced to become the man's wife.

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<v Speaker 1>She would become a part of her new tribe. Family

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<v Speaker 1>and community are often important in finding a husband or

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<v Speaker 1>a wife. For royal families, this choice can also affect

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<v Speaker 1>a whole country. Often these marriages are arranged, that is,

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<v Speaker 1>other people helped to choose the husband or wife, or

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<v Speaker 1>others even force a particular choice.

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<v Speaker 2>Arranged marriages were common through history among royal families as

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<v Speaker 2>a way to bring security to a country. One example

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<v Speaker 2>of this is Queen Maria Theresa of Austria. She had

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<v Speaker 2>thirteen sons and daughters. She used her children as a

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<v Speaker 2>way to help her country avoid wars. The Queen forced

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<v Speaker 2>her children to marry dukes and duchesses from other countries.

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<v Speaker 2>By the end of her life, Maria had children who

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<v Speaker 2>were part of the royal families of Spain, France, Netherlands

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<v Speaker 2>and Italy.

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<v Speaker 1>Arranged marriages do not just happen among rich and powerful people,

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<v Speaker 1>and they are often a way for parents to love

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<v Speaker 1>and care for their children. This kind of marriage is

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<v Speaker 1>common in many cultures.

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<v Speaker 2>In some parts of Pakistan, families follow a courtship tradition

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<v Speaker 2>called pate leiki. In the Urbdu language, pate means written

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<v Speaker 2>leiki means stomach, so pate leiki means written on the stomach.

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<v Speaker 2>Two families agree to marry their children before they are

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<v Speaker 2>born or when they are very young. The marriage then

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<v Speaker 2>happens when the children are young adults. The children must

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<v Speaker 2>follow the wishes of their families. They are not permitted

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<v Speaker 2>to decide whom they will marry, but recently courts in

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<v Speaker 2>Pakistan have tried to fight this tradition.

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<v Speaker 1>There is also a form of arranged marriage in Japan.

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<v Speaker 1>There this process is called miyai. Parents will choose a

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<v Speaker 1>boy for their daughter to meet. Sometimes the family will

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<v Speaker 1>hire a nakodo or go between a person who knows

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<v Speaker 1>many young people in the community. This nakodo will then

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<v Speaker 1>choose two available people. The man and women look at

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<v Speaker 1>pictures of each other and then decide to meet. The

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<v Speaker 1>families and the son and daughter all attend this first meeting.

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<v Speaker 1>If the meeting goes well, then the couple may meet

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<v Speaker 1>again and someday get married. But if a marriage is

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<v Speaker 1>not arranged, how do two people find each other for marriage?

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<v Speaker 1>There are many other traditions that help people meet each other.

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<v Speaker 2>Meeting in public places is a common custom for courtship.

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<v Speaker 2>In the village of Crosscombe in England, young men and

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<v Speaker 2>women had an interesting courting tradition in the fourteen hundreds.

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<v Speaker 2>The young, unmarried women in the village would block the

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<v Speaker 2>village streets. They would make all the the unmarried men

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<v Speaker 2>pay a fine to pass through. The next day, the

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<v Speaker 2>unmarried men would block the street and the women would

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<v Speaker 2>have to pay. All the money collected went to the

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<v Speaker 2>local church, and the young men and women got to

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<v Speaker 2>know each other a little better.

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<v Speaker 1>A newer form of courtship is called speed dating. The

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<v Speaker 1>idea started in Beverly Hills, California, in nineteen eighty eight.

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<v Speaker 1>Here is how speed dating works. Many men and women

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<v Speaker 1>gather together at a restaurant or bar. A speed dating

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<v Speaker 1>leader tells the people what to do. Each man finds

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<v Speaker 1>a woman to talk with and they sit down at

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<v Speaker 1>a table. The man and woman talk and ask questions

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<v Speaker 1>to quickly learn about the other person. After about five minutes,

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<v Speaker 1>the speed dating leader rings a bell. Everyone must find

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<v Speaker 1>a new person to talk with.

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<v Speaker 2>The men and women talk to many people throughout the night.

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<v Speaker 2>If a man enjoys talking to one particular woman, he

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<v Speaker 2>writes her name down. The women do the same thing.

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<v Speaker 2>At the end of the night, everyone gives their names

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<v Speaker 2>to the speed dating leader. If a man and woman

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<v Speaker 2>wrote each other's names, they are a match. The speed

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<v Speaker 2>dating leader gives them the phone number or email address

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<v Speaker 2>of their match.

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<v Speaker 1>Speed dating may seem like a foolish way to meet people.

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<v Speaker 1>How much can you really learn about a person in

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<v Speaker 1>just five minutes, But many experts say that some of

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<v Speaker 1>the most important opinions you make about someone happen within

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<v Speaker 1>the first thirty seconds. Speed dating is quick courtship.

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<v Speaker 2>Courtship traditions in the Philippines are not quick like this. Instead,

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<v Speaker 2>in many different parts, the man and the woman slowly

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<v Speaker 2>show interest in each other. When the interest is confirmed,

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<v Speaker 2>they begin to go on dates. But in different areas

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<v Speaker 2>of the country, there are other traditions too. In the

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<v Speaker 2>Palawan region, men perform courtship through the use of love riddles.

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<v Speaker 2>A riddle is a question that must be solved. Riddles

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<v Speaker 2>often have hidden meanings. The parents of the girl ask

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<v Speaker 2>the man and his parents riddles to learn more about them.

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<v Speaker 1>In the Pungasanan region of the Philippines, the man makes tagaama,

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<v Speaker 1>a liquid love potion. He gives this to the woman,

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<v Speaker 1>hoping she will drink the tagaama or use it as

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<v Speaker 1>a perfume and fall in love with him. If this

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<v Speaker 1>does not work, he will act out a story or

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<v Speaker 1>drama to show his love for the woman. In the

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<v Speaker 1>Versaiahs region, the men sing songs to the women they

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<v Speaker 1>want to marry. Men also will write love letters and

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<v Speaker 1>give these to a close friend to bring to the woman.

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<v Speaker 1>But the man does not only write to the woman,

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<v Speaker 1>he also writes to her family.

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<v Speaker 2>Whatever the culture, courtship is an important part of life.

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<v Speaker 2>Courtship is how we decide whom to marry. It is

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<v Speaker 2>part of forming families. No matter how you find a

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<v Speaker 2>husband or wife, courtship is the first part of forming

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<v Speaker 2>a good marriage relationship.

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<v Speaker 1>What do you think of these courtship traditions? What do

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<v Speaker 1>you look for in a person who you will marry?

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<v Speaker 1>What character treats build a lifelong commitment to another person?

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<v Speaker 1>Share your thoughts with us. You can leave a comment

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<v Speaker 1>on our website at www dot Spotlight English dot com.

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<v Speaker 1>You can also find us on YouTube, Facebook, TikTok, Blue

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<v Speaker 2>The writers and producers of this program were from the

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<v Speaker 2>Spotlight team. The voices you heard were from the United

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<v Speaker 2>Kingdom and the United States. All quotes were adapted for

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<v Speaker 2>this program and voiced by Spotlight. You can listen to

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<v Speaker 2>this program again and read it on the internet at

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<v Speaker 2>www dot Radio English dot net. This program is called

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<v Speaker 2>Traditions of Love.

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<v Speaker 1>We hope you will join us for the next Spotlight program. Goodbye,