Speaker 1: You're watching Chewing the Cud with Dominic Berry and Lee Robertson.
Speaker 1: So quite small but very very hairy if you just
Speaker 1: think one of the Ewoks from Star Wars. Hello, you
Speaker 1: are watching Chewing the Cuds, your weekly lighthearted show examining
Speaker 1: the world. There are a slightly glittery kaleidoscope. I am
Speaker 1: dominic Berry and with me today is a man who
Speaker 1: needs no introduction. We give him mine anyway, Lee Robertson, Hello.
Speaker 2: Thank you aka the Ewark Appreciation Society President.
Speaker 1: Good times.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, because in your teeth so I've always got
Speaker 2: to have a bit of floss.
Speaker 1: On beautiful, what of you Godfersley.
Speaker 2: I'm bringing you some information about some very famous children's
Speaker 2: films that are being given a facelift and a makeover.
Speaker 2: And I'm also going to be bringing you something I've
Speaker 2: actually practiced in Crafty Queen's Wow.
Speaker 1: And we even have a game for you, oh to
Speaker 1: play along with two But now on the screen you
Speaker 1: can see our contact details. It is the Cud TV
Speaker 1: on your social media and if you want to catch
Speaker 1: up with previous episodes, you can always binge us on YouTube.
Speaker 1: Just look out for chuewing the cut.
Speaker 2: You can see the names of people who have reached
Speaker 2: out and tickled our fancies going across the bottom of
Speaker 2: the screen and we go over to dominic in the buzz.
Speaker 1: Lee. Yeah, if I said to you spice cruise, I
Speaker 1: would not be referring to a big boat full of
Speaker 1: people on a nefarious drug.
Speaker 2: I wouldn't be talking like a Spice Cay's Tribute cruise, nor.
Speaker 1: Would I be speaking about that. I would be speaking
Speaker 1: about naked holidays, naked cruising. The swingers, six thousand folks,
Speaker 1: what was what was? What were you min?
Speaker 2: You went swingers and then you put your hand straight
Speaker 2: down to your grin and a reaction that almost.
Speaker 1: Was well, this is for swingers. But there are very
Speaker 1: strict rules. And this has kind of made the news
Speaker 1: because some people think that it is no fun that
Speaker 1: there are too many rules on this spicy cruise holiday.
Speaker 1: Now I'll give you some of the rules and say,
Speaker 1: I'll tell you my opinion. Already I think they're all fair.
Speaker 1: So you've got to be over what age eighteen twenty one?
Speaker 2: Is that American? Is it by any chance? Then?
Speaker 1: Yes?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Second rule no means no, that's fair, isn't it?
Speaker 2: First, that's not like too strict unless it's for the buffet,
Speaker 2: and it's always yeah, true, true, more is more.
Speaker 1: No nudity in the elevator, in your room. It's allowed
Speaker 1: on deck in the public areas like seawood facing. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but the elevator is a no go, no go.
Speaker 2: Do you have to cover with a small cloth until
Speaker 2: you kind of get to the destination.
Speaker 1: I think I want even more than he's going to
Speaker 1: be unders in the elevator. Okay, Okay, Next rule, I
Speaker 1: mean I think all these are fair. Next rule, body
Speaker 1: cot sorry, body paint. Body paint does not count as close.
Speaker 2: Said, I'd be straight off then, because that's all I use.
Speaker 1: I think it does.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Next rule, sit on a towel, not a face. Well,
Speaker 1: I think that's as opposed to a nude on the deck.
Speaker 2: So no, no kind of skid marks on any upholstery.
Speaker 1: No skid marks. And no sex unless you're in the
Speaker 1: designated play area. Sex in the elevators, sex in the galley,
Speaker 1: bend anybody over the buffet forbidden. And finally, sex is
Speaker 1: not for sale. No purchasing of sex. It should be
Speaker 1: consent ual, free enterprise.
Speaker 2: Is this for the Is this for the heterosexuals. It
Speaker 2: is it for them with all the rules.
Speaker 1: I don't do you think that Do you think that
Speaker 1: is too many? I think they're all fair.
Speaker 2: But you know, if it if it organizes the fun,
Speaker 2: that's great. If you put like hundred gay men on
Speaker 2: a boat, that don't mean ship dex will be a
Speaker 2: watch with comm.
Speaker 1: I suppose I'm saying I think it's fair enough that
Speaker 1: they are saying these rules. I guess it depends how
Speaker 1: pedantic they are. Can you sit on a towel please?
Speaker 2: Could spoil the mood kind of and say yeah.
Speaker 1: Down at the job center having a universal credit check? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Do you want to be sex police?
Speaker 2: I don't think it's for me. You know what big
Speaker 2: sex police? Or doing and doing a spicy sex cruise?
Speaker 1: No, moving on. Are you a person who has a car?
Speaker 1: Do you drive?
Speaker 2: I think saying it's a car it's a very roundabout
Speaker 2: way of describing it. It is a form of transportation.
Speaker 1: Do you clean it yourself?
Speaker 2: Clean its own ecs?
Speaker 1: Does anybody clean it for you? If you haven't paid
Speaker 1: for a clean once or twice?
Speaker 2: And I visit their graves often.
Speaker 1: Well, there's a new story about one gentleman who has
Speaker 1: taken his automobile to the car wash. Now this is
Speaker 1: something he's got a regular service. He pays forty five
Speaker 1: quid a month, wow, every month for the service plan
Speaker 1: that they offer. It's I think it might be a
Speaker 1: Mercedes it owns. It's certainly yeah, yeah, he's with Mercedes.
Speaker 2: It's sort of service.
Speaker 1: You're jumping ahead, story, you're jumping ahead, You're you're.
Speaker 2: Guessing, very warped mind.
Speaker 1: There's the dash camp in the vehicle which caught a
Speaker 1: cleaner relieving himself upon the vehicle having a Wii, having
Speaker 1: a Wii. There he is having a Wii.
Speaker 2: I was not emotionally, physically, psychologically prepared for that photograph.
Speaker 1: Does he have legs underneath underneath.
Speaker 2: Sorrys like an amputee on then of his car having
Speaker 2: a piss?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 2: No, your reaction is he's pissing on the bonnet. He
Speaker 2: just you know, does is that all his piss behind
Speaker 2: the green on the wall.
Speaker 1: Yes?
Speaker 2: Absolutely, yes, with that gets a buff on your bonnet
Speaker 2: like piss.
Speaker 1: I personally haven't ever weed on anybody's car, but nor
Speaker 1: have I been in employment to wash cars. And I
Speaker 1: think you know what, you know what I'm always yeah,
Speaker 1: I just think. I just think, yeah, I'm on his side.
Speaker 1: I mean I'm on his side, like yeah.
Speaker 2: A bonnet, Yeah, I mean.
Speaker 1: Coming in gay. This is why I would never be
Speaker 1: employed for such a job.
Speaker 2: But like, yeah, piss on the bonnet, don't ship on
Speaker 2: the wheels.
Speaker 1: Good advice, good advice for life. There. If you want
Speaker 1: to wash a car, you can message Lead directly, or
Speaker 1: you can share with us and we'll vet your comments
Speaker 1: on the cud TV on your social media. Now that
Speaker 1: brings us to the story of The Weekly New York
Speaker 1: photo artist gren Halt.
Speaker 2: Oh good pronunciation.
Speaker 1: I don't know if he is a good pronunciation. So
Speaker 1: he's known for his stunning male nude photographs. So he's
Speaker 1: got a calendar for twenty twenty five.
Speaker 2: You're getting excited because it could contain derriers.
Speaker 1: It does contain. That's not the focus. The title is
Speaker 1: the Fine Art of Erections. Oh, but some of them.
Speaker 2: Are like I'm not looking, turn my head. Is there
Speaker 2: anything distressing?
Speaker 1: I would say it's a seven out of ten on
Speaker 1: the distressing.
Speaker 2: Oh, okay, that's fine.
Speaker 1: I can go with that. It's having a lovely time,
Speaker 1: isn't he He's having a good old, good old stroke.
Speaker 1: There it costs you twenty one quid for the calendar.
Speaker 1: It's described as a masterful blend of elegance and audacity,
Speaker 1: the male form captured like never before. Lee, So you
Speaker 1: have a look at some of us, or look at these,
Speaker 1: look at these. I mean he's just been brushing his teeth.
Speaker 1: He got a little bit of toothpaste on his finger.
Speaker 1: He's just sort of he should be using a towel,
Speaker 1: but he's just getting it off on the mirror.
Speaker 2: Is he drawing a cock in jazz on his mirror?
Speaker 2: He is, That's what he's doing, is going shaft balls.
Speaker 2: You'll do that, okay. And he's just kind of like
Speaker 2: looking at Oh wow, I have a penis great. Yeah,
Speaker 2: oh hello, he's fallen and he cannot get up.
Speaker 1: No, no, and he can't reach.
Speaker 2: For his button because his hands around his cop and
Speaker 2: he's like, oh my penis likes a good read. I
Speaker 2: can't do anything until it's read the dailies. Yeah, well,
Speaker 2: how lovely, how artistic?
Speaker 1: Yeah? Is this very red?
Speaker 2: Isn't it that one? The end of the very ends,
Speaker 2: very red.
Speaker 1: That's all we've got from the buzz for this week.
Speaker 1: Thank you very much, and if your ends very red,
Speaker 1: go to the dartests, get some creen. Good advice. You're
Speaker 1: full of good advice Web excellent, excellent. All right, stay
Speaker 1: right there, everybody, because coming up after this short break,
Speaker 1: we are going to get up to date with celebrity
Speaker 1: news in showbiz. Welcome back everyone. You are still watching
Speaker 1: Chewing the Cards and this is a part of the
Speaker 1: show where we're going to look into the sparkly side
Speaker 1: of the world as celebrity and media in the showbiz
Speaker 1: with Lee.
Speaker 2: So my first story, if you are a homosexual sensitive nature,
Speaker 2: you may need to kind of fast forward this bit
Speaker 2: because it's about it's about lady parts. And so the
Speaker 2: actress Naomi Watts. Are you familiar with her work? She
Speaker 2: was in King Kong, The Ring, the remake of The Ring.
Speaker 1: I know, I don't know what was she doing with
Speaker 1: her time.
Speaker 2: Well, when she's not making films, she's she's become the
Speaker 2: agony ant for Hollywood's female glitterati. So she's written a
Speaker 2: book because they're all so this is this is Naomi Watts.
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, I reckonize.
Speaker 2: She's she's she's done a book about herself because that's
Speaker 2: what celebrities do, and it's all about how she has
Speaker 2: gained a love for sex toys and was forced to
Speaker 2: whip off a HRT patch before getting frisky with her
Speaker 2: new partner. So she's OSCAR nominated King Kong. This is
Speaker 2: her book. This is her Now. I don't think she's
Speaker 2: playing with a sex toe. Well, she had that photgraph taken.
Speaker 2: We don't know, we can't see. This is her book.
Speaker 2: So her book is kind of like about having the
Speaker 2: menopause and being a sexual woman and all that kind
Speaker 2: of stuff. So she tells a story about how her
Speaker 2: fifteen year old daughter discovered that she had bought a
Speaker 2: new and excellent vibrator that glows in the dark and
Speaker 2: has multiple speeds. She's very straight, and she said, one night,
Speaker 2: I was in the mood, but on my own. So
Speaker 2: I got out of the bath and I got into
Speaker 2: bed with my new Rose vibrator. This is said Vibrate,
Speaker 2: not hers specifically. It's very clean, she said. I realized
Speaker 2: that it had a sucking feature, so I decided to
Speaker 2: try that out of my nipple. I know it's not
Speaker 2: common to engage in fore play with yourself, but for
Speaker 2: this particular night, I decided I would take my time
Speaker 2: with myself. Afterwards, I brought the rods back in the
Speaker 2: box and left it beside me as we were going
Speaker 2: to have poist coital.
Speaker 1: Pillow talk Wow. On a previous show, you and I
Speaker 1: did lee, I said that the look of prothetic penises
Speaker 1: made me stop being gay. I found so repulsive. I
Speaker 1: think you've told me that. Do you find I was dead? No,
Speaker 1: your voice, your voice telling me all that was that
Speaker 1: was erotic.
Speaker 2: It gets hiets. So the next morning, if your Jo
Speaker 2: came into the bedroom and saw the box and said, Mom,
Speaker 2: what's that? And now we replied, all women have vibrators.
Speaker 2: That's very generally generalizing, and you can even get them
Speaker 2: urban outfitters. Now okay, but I was mortified. And on
Speaker 2: top of that, my nipple was throbbing all day. So
Speaker 2: there's a lessons we learned, though, isn't there.
Speaker 1: Magnificent?
Speaker 2: Don't clump you've had read Judge Nipple.
Speaker 1: I moved to the great city of Manchester from rural
Speaker 1: Wales and I started dating a feller and I thought,
Speaker 1: you know, I was like nineteen twenty. I thought it
Speaker 1: was the most like radical, exciting guy ever. And I
Speaker 1: had this idea because I grown up so rurally and
Speaker 1: people that didn't say what was necessarily going on behind
Speaker 1: closed doors. So I had the very narrow minded opinion
Speaker 1: that all the straits were boring. And me and my
Speaker 1: fellow at the time, we found in the in the
Speaker 1: what this this this proofs that we were prying? We
Speaker 1: found a strap on device in the communal areas that
Speaker 1: was used by the straight housemate and his girlfriend. And
Speaker 1: I just couldn't believe it.
Speaker 2: Please tell me you did not use it.
Speaker 1: Oh, you have no need, but you know it was theirs.
Speaker 1: It was theirs to enjoy. But it was an eye
Speaker 1: opener for me. It was like, you know, the straits
Speaker 1: can like sex to do they can, some of them do.
Speaker 2: Some of them aren't bad people. If you find second
Speaker 2: hand sex toy that are white, thirst for.
Speaker 1: Good for this is all wonderful, Good for speaking about sex,
Speaker 1: Good for a person who isn't the youngest person planet
Speaker 1: to being about getting older, doing about changes in the body, brilliant.
Speaker 1: I loved all of that.
Speaker 2: To a heart's content. Hollywood Hills, Oh that's the show news.
Speaker 2: Have you seen Wicked the film musical? Blah blah blah.
Speaker 1: When seeing the West End? I've seen the stage show,
Speaker 1: which I liked I liked, Yeah, I liked it. I'm
Speaker 1: not I'm not one of those gays who's like it's
Speaker 1: the best thing. Ever. So the movies come along, I've thought, oh, yeah,
Speaker 1: good on them. I'm not keen on the fact that
Speaker 1: he's split into two, like longer than a stage show.
Speaker 1: When's that thing?
Speaker 2: It's that this is well anyway, I haven't not seen
Speaker 2: it because I do not like it.
Speaker 1: Okay, that's a shock to people because it's boring.
Speaker 2: I went since stage show full asleep, welcome for flying
Speaker 2: without gravity, fell back asleep again.
Speaker 1: I mean that's kind of my feeling too. So when
Speaker 1: they're like, gets what it's going to be even longer,
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, really, I don't want to.
Speaker 2: Hear you singing about walking down the street.
Speaker 1: It's based on a book. Is that book? I mean
Speaker 1: there is a.
Speaker 2: Yeah, there is a I've heard.
Speaker 1: Good reviews of the book so well.
Speaker 2: Cynthia Revera, who plays the Green Witch in Elizabeth in Wicked.
Speaker 2: They've been doing all this kind of press stuff. Oh
Speaker 2: it's exhausted me. That part is why I haven't seen it,
Speaker 2: because they've irritated me so much. Hold my finger. That's
Speaker 2: why they I wasn't going to like make far or
Speaker 2: anything like that, because I would have said, pull my finger.
Speaker 1: So I've seen them doing the whole same things, sain
Speaker 1: thing that dead Pool and Wolverine did, and the kind
Speaker 1: of little rat anyway is quite vanilla.
Speaker 2: They've kind of like asked her what kind of role
Speaker 2: would she like to go on next, and she said
Speaker 2: that she quite like to take on the role of
Speaker 2: Storm from X Men. Great, so she said, you know,
Speaker 2: it might be a little bit cheesy. So this is
Speaker 2: this is Cynthia here, she's great, and this is any
Speaker 2: playing Storm because she who's also great. So she's kind
Speaker 2: of like said, you know, I quite like the idea
Speaker 2: of playing that. She said it sounds frivolous, but I
Speaker 2: think we haven't uncovered how grand she is after all
Speaker 2: that in a tourm oile at Tormole in a tourmoil
Speaker 2: to what is that word, I'm trying to say turmoil.
Speaker 1: Yeah, actual think I.
Speaker 2: Think it would be great. So, yeah, she's kind of
Speaker 2: put it out there, because what to do. They kind
Speaker 2: of like put stuff out there and people go, oh,
Speaker 2: what about that. Yeah, I didn't really know her. I'm
Speaker 2: not really an X Men person. I'm not a.
Speaker 1: I'm not so into the X Men, but I'm massively
Speaker 1: into comic books in general, and one of my problems
Speaker 1: with X Men is just how many characters there are.
Speaker 1: The Storm is a brilliant character, and I believe I
Speaker 1: remember halle Berry saying a similar thing, that she loved
Speaker 1: playing the role, but she felt that it wasn't fully realized.
Speaker 1: But of course it's not fully realized because there's like
Speaker 1: a million comic books. What I do know is a
Speaker 1: video game fan, is that back in the early two thousands,
Speaker 1: there were very, very, very very few playable black women
Speaker 1: in video games, and Storm in the video game Marvel
Speaker 1: versus Capcom three is playable and is mighty fine. So
Speaker 1: I'm a big fan of Storm. Yeah, character also in
Speaker 1: a lego Marvel as well. That's the game. I don't
Speaker 1: know that.
Speaker 2: She's apparently one of the most powerful mutants of all,
Speaker 2: but she suffers about all of themabilitating claustrophobia. When there's
Speaker 2: a reason Sam having once been trapped onto rubble as
Speaker 2: a child with the buddies of a dying parents. That's
Speaker 2: going to give you a clusterphy, isn't it? Nothing else?
Speaker 2: So we're just going to wait and see whether Cynthia
Speaker 2: does indeed pop on a white wig.
Speaker 1: And one of the reasons that Hugh Jackman as Wolverine
Speaker 1: has done so well and Ryan Reddoles as Deadpool has
Speaker 1: done so well is that the characters are focused on
Speaker 1: like Storm has only been part of an ensemble. And
Speaker 1: really I think, yeah, there's movies like Guardians of the
Speaker 1: Galaxy that have done a good job of but for everyone.
Speaker 1: And then there's like a Justice League, which suffered from
Speaker 1: just having a glut of too many people. You know,
Speaker 1: Marvel's the eternal same thing. So I would love a
Speaker 1: Storm solo movie. I would love that, and I would
Speaker 1: love her to play it now.
Speaker 2: When you were talking there and it was a bit
Speaker 2: like work because my partner's very much into interax Men
Speaker 2: and just went enough to the happy place that I
Speaker 2: do when he talks about it. So just as we
Speaker 2: are listening at all, and that is the end of
Speaker 2: this week Showby's news.
Speaker 1: Thank you for that. Lee. Well don't you go anywhere,
Speaker 1: because coming back, we are going to have a game
Speaker 1: for you to play along with at home in our
Speaker 1: game of the week, Welcome back to Chewing the Card
Speaker 1: with Me, dominic Berry and them Lee Robertson. Now is
Speaker 1: the part of the show where we're going to play
Speaker 1: a game, and this is one for a man who
Speaker 1: is no stranger to danger. We are going to test
Speaker 1: out Lee. So over to the contestants. It's very very forceful. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Day of the week, alright, Lee. So fewers who've seen
Speaker 1: previous shows will know that Lee once challenged me in
Speaker 1: a quiz called oh bum. But now the bottoms have
Speaker 1: turned and it is Lee's turn today to guess the
Speaker 1: identity of the mysterious bottom. I'm going to show you
Speaker 1: on the screen a far of a famous bump. It's
Speaker 1: your job, Lee to say, to whom does this bottom belong?
Speaker 1: We've got three questions that you can ask me, and
Speaker 1: I will give you a yes or no answer to
Speaker 1: help you.
Speaker 2: I am a certified Tucker's linguist, so I am very positive.
Speaker 2: I'm of the outcome of this.
Speaker 1: Well. I only scored one out of four when we
Speaker 1: did it on me, and I thought I was a
Speaker 1: black in bottoms. Yeah, we'll find out. So that's the score.
Speaker 1: If you get more than one, then you than you
Speaker 1: have won Lee. If you get more than one, I
Speaker 1: become a top Bring on the first bottom. What do
Speaker 1: we make of that? Lee? What do we make of that?
Speaker 2: I'm gonna ask a question.
Speaker 1: Is this.
Speaker 2: A current actor?
Speaker 1: It's not a current actor? No, it's not, Lee.
Speaker 2: Is this celebrity posterior no longer with us?
Speaker 1: Is it a corpse bottom? No, it's not a corpse bottom? Lee?
Speaker 2: Oh, I only have one more? Can this ass fly
Speaker 2: at the speed of light?
Speaker 1: An interesting question? Well, I'm going to say. I'm going
Speaker 1: to say yes. I'm going to say this. He asks,
Speaker 1: can fly at the speed of light? Make of that
Speaker 1: what you will? Lee? All your guesses are used up? Doom,
Speaker 1: Does this mighty bottom belong?
Speaker 2: I think that that is a pre Superman? Oh's see
Speaker 2: called Henry Cavill.
Speaker 1: Let's see Is this the bottom of Henry Cavill? Oh? No,
Speaker 1: not Henry Cavill. Nathan Fillion is from a different sci
Speaker 1: fi series. He's from Firefly and Serendipity.
Speaker 2: I think is he not Superman?
Speaker 1: Not Superman? No, So you misled yourself because he flies
Speaker 1: at like their equivalent of warp speed. But within a vehicle, Lee,
Speaker 1: within a vehicle? Geek asses the best kind Man, that's
Speaker 1: the best kind. All right, Let's move on to bottom
Speaker 1: number two. Have we got? Oh? We got? That's how
Speaker 1: it looks so uh? A horizontal bottom for you? Here? Lee?
Speaker 1: Horizontal bottom? Who's presenting their cheeks to you? Here?
Speaker 2: It's pretty muscular bottom, isn't it? It's very Is that
Speaker 2: your question?
Speaker 1: Is it a muscular bottom?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 1: I'm just be careful how you word your words.
Speaker 2: Lee, it's pretty muscular. Is this Is this gentleman's posterior
Speaker 2: from the Americas? Or is it from the UK?
Speaker 1: It's a yes or no question, Lee, don't deviate. You
Speaker 1: may ask one or the other unless you want to
Speaker 1: use up two lives in one go.
Speaker 2: Is this man from I beg your pardon.
Speaker 1: Just because I was stern with you this no need
Speaker 1: for that kind of language. Is were you referring to
Speaker 1: the image of screen? Is that the insult you're calling
Speaker 1: me for being straight?
Speaker 2: Is this? Is this?
Speaker 1: This?
Speaker 2: This?
Speaker 1: Thisiry a British No, not a British therrier.
Speaker 2: Is Is he also a superhero?
Speaker 1: Yes?
Speaker 2: I have one more question? Is does he set himself
Speaker 2: on fire?
Speaker 1: I can see the train of thought that you're going on,
Speaker 1: a bottom of which I'm most fond, But that's if
Speaker 1: our minds are reliant. That's not this bottom This is
Speaker 1: not a bottom which sets itself on fire.
Speaker 2: I like that song by this os is on fire.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna go right, is it is? It? Is it
Speaker 2: a Hemsworth? Who do who?
Speaker 1: There's Thor Hemsworth and there's not Thor Hemsworth.
Speaker 2: Thoor Hemsworth for Christopher, Christopher Christopher Helmsworth.
Speaker 1: Let's have a look. Is indeed we are Necker neck?
Speaker 1: We are Neck a fellow chewing the cut. Host Mike
Speaker 1: and I had a very long conversation about the seage
Speaker 1: of Christoph Hemsworth's bottom in a real bottom. I believe
Speaker 1: that is, but we're talking about later later representation of
Speaker 1: his bottom. But let's have our next one with Necker next,
Speaker 1: so we've got equal scores. I identified Chesney Hawks when
Speaker 1: I was doing You've got Chris. I'd rather have Chesney
Speaker 1: Hawks bottom. Give him the choice. That's the kind of
Speaker 1: man I am. But what kind of man do we
Speaker 1: have for bottom number three? Let's have a look. Let's
Speaker 1: have a look. Ask question one about bottom three words
Speaker 1: I never thought i'd be saying in my career. Is
Speaker 1: this a TV actor? The TV bottom? Is your question?
Speaker 1: The answer is no, This bottom is not a bottom
Speaker 1: for the small screen.
Speaker 2: Is this bottom still with us?
Speaker 1: You really think I'm going to bring out like the
Speaker 1: undead bottoms? And no they're not just the.
Speaker 2: Living type buns of steel the dead also used to
Speaker 2: but now they're just bones and stuff.
Speaker 1: This bottom is still flesh and muscle. Is it a fridge?
Speaker 2: You see it a fridge? No, that's my question.
Speaker 1: Is it a fridge?
Speaker 2: Is that our fridge? Looking at the fridge in the
Speaker 2: fridge in the picture?
Speaker 1: Is that?
Speaker 2: Is that a recent picture?
Speaker 1: That's a very good question that the picture isn't from recently.
Speaker 2: No, no, may I see it again?
Speaker 1: This is your chance to overtake me in the bottom race.
Speaker 1: Come on mee hmmm, Matt Damon, you say, Matt Damon,
Speaker 1: Let's see. Oh just intimate. I think I know that's
Speaker 1: from the movie Going the Distance, is indeed? Yeah, so yeah,
Speaker 1: it's our geek film. It's it's a it's a funny film.
Speaker 2: It's a massive boner and has to lie on the toilet.
Speaker 1: No, No, that's that's the guy from zac Efron. That
Speaker 1: is sorry, let's have out. Is this our final bottom?
Speaker 1: Let's have our next bottom? It's still neck connect, still necknet.
Speaker 2: Oh, look at a thone. Yes, is this a musical artist? No,
Speaker 2: it's in another actor?
Speaker 1: Yes?
Speaker 2: Is this is this? Is this from a film?
Speaker 1: This particular image is from a film?
Speaker 2: Yes, I think I think it's what's his face Channing
Speaker 2: Tatum Channing tape from Did the Dirty Magic Mic? Dirty Decad?
Speaker 1: Is that what it was?
Speaker 2: Magic Mic?
Speaker 1: Yes, that's the Sulford version of Magic Mike, isn't it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: let's find out. Let's have a look at the full image. No,
Speaker 1: Matt Ballmer, who's here? Then the character from Magic Mike?
Speaker 1: But he's not Magic Mic himself, just.
Speaker 2: Getting my generic.
Speaker 1: If you had a different if you had a different
Speaker 1: kind of oes that didn't have a direct conflict of interest,
Speaker 1: I might have given you a half mark. But there's
Speaker 1: no way I'm doing that because I don't want you
Speaker 1: to beat me in this way. So have we got
Speaker 1: time for one more bottom? One more bottom? Last bottom?
Speaker 1: Let's see. Although I've lost can I think he might
Speaker 1: have had more bottoms than I had, which should never
Speaker 1: be allowed. Let's have one more, one more bottom by
Speaker 1: the sea.
Speaker 2: I think I know who's asked? No, okay, is this
Speaker 2: an English posterior?
Speaker 1: Well it's not. No, it's not it's not. Actually so
Speaker 1: you don't know as much about bottoms as you think.
Speaker 2: Is this bottom married to a pop star?
Speaker 1: Well, let me ever think about that. No, No, it's because.
Speaker 2: I last question, is it another American?
Speaker 1: It is an American bottom. We've been quite us heavy
Speaker 1: cheeks today.
Speaker 2: I'm going to say, Matthew McConaughey.
Speaker 1: Think you might kick yourself when we see the full inially,
Speaker 1: let us reveal the owner of the final bottom by
Speaker 1: the sea.
Speaker 2: That's no, that has been. That's not him. That's been,
Speaker 2: that's been tweaked.
Speaker 1: False.
Speaker 2: Okay, that's enough now at bottoms and things like that.
Speaker 2: After this short break, we got a craft on with
Speaker 2: me in Crafty.
Speaker 1: Queens Welcome Back. You were still watching me Dominique Berry
Speaker 1: and the other one Lee in Chewing the Cards. Now
Speaker 1: we're going to go and do something that fifty percent
Speaker 1: of the studio will have never done before. In Crafty Queens.
Speaker 2: I was really hoping that I would have left this
Speaker 2: behind in twenty twenty four hard my life friend. So
Speaker 2: we have to do it. Have you ever have you
Speaker 2: ever done a Crafty Queen said?
Speaker 1: Mom, Yes, I have done. When the lovely Mike has
Speaker 1: been there. Oh it was. It was joyful, So I
Speaker 1: have high expectations. Did you make with him? It was
Speaker 1: something a little bit rude action, was it?
Speaker 2: It was that could be anything. Well, you may be
Speaker 2: able to fit this in your mouth that we're going today,
Speaker 2: but I don't think you will you be able to
Speaker 2: fit in other areas orifices.
Speaker 1: Don't you ever feel stressed all day, all day day?
Speaker 2: Yeah, particularly now at this very moment, perhaps near you
Speaker 2: could just squeeze, squeeze very hard so that it take
Speaker 2: all your aggression.
Speaker 1: Out on never enough things to throttle fury of life
Speaker 1: as a contemporary slam spoken word artist, and you know what.
Speaker 2: People frown upon me throttling small children, dogs, birds, pigeons
Speaker 2: if you can catch them.
Speaker 1: They don't like that.
Speaker 2: So what we're going to do is we're going to
Speaker 2: make an alternative, something that you can squeeze or alternatively,
Speaker 2: feeling a little bit down, you just want something to
Speaker 2: I was going to say, wang into you can.
Speaker 1: Do multi multi chase.
Speaker 2: So in front of you, you have a selection of socks.
Speaker 2: Yeah finest the online shopping from another continent can buy.
Speaker 2: You may choose whichever one you would like. You have,
Speaker 2: you have, you have kind of an animal, the both
Speaker 2: animal prick. I think the brighter one. Yeah, are you
Speaker 2: gonna go for the brighter one? Okay, so we're gonna
Speaker 2: we're gonna do this first. I have also provided you
Speaker 2: with a bag of rice. I would like you to
Speaker 2: make a risotto just using what you've got in front
Speaker 2: of you. No, so you're gonna need you're gonna need
Speaker 2: your ress because we're gonna fill the sock up with rice.
Speaker 1: Okay, out of the bag.
Speaker 2: Out of the bag. Yeah, because we want that squeezy texture.
Speaker 1: Okay. Is this gonna have a face. Yeah, I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna trottll something with a face.
Speaker 2: It's not what you said last night. Bag on my head?
Speaker 1: Awkward? I can't Yeah, I can't pull it apart wide enough.
Speaker 2: Corner. Oh, it's made to go all wrong.
Speaker 1: So mess is fine? Is it all going in this?
Speaker 2: It's fine. I just leave here when I finished. I
Speaker 2: don't do it. So what you couldn't do it is
Speaker 2: you need to kind of like like you're going to
Speaker 2: put the sock on, so like kind of scrunch it
Speaker 2: into a little like a little rammakin Right. We pour
Speaker 2: in the rice and we're going to put all this right,
Speaker 2: all of it, all of it into the sock. You
Speaker 2: might have to kind of stop a couple of times.
Speaker 1: To well, I won't because I've made such a pig's
Speaker 1: ear of it.
Speaker 2: But it's very aggressive. It's me very Neil Buchana never
Speaker 2: puts up with this kind of scintillated this with a
Speaker 2: viewers watching. It's pouring rice into a sock. How are
Speaker 2: you doing?
Speaker 1: Ye're almost there? Okay.
Speaker 2: It doesn't need to be right to the very top
Speaker 2: because you need a little bit of a little bit
Speaker 2: of slack.
Speaker 1: Okay, now what okay, So.
Speaker 2: Now you're going to tie a knot in the top
Speaker 2: as tight as you can, like a balloon knot? Do
Speaker 2: do you don't?
Speaker 1: Really?
Speaker 2: We don't want any of the rice to come out.
Speaker 1: Oh you're you right? Okay, you've done it better than me,
Speaker 1: but go on, thanks, terity it confident.
Speaker 2: Right, Okay, So you can't pop it in the middle
Speaker 2: up right like that in front of you. It's a
Speaker 2: little it's like a little figure, isn't It's like a little.
Speaker 1: It's like a little duck.
Speaker 2: Heck quere Okay, yeah, you are like a face bear quirk.
Speaker 2: You need your ribbon, a little bit of velvet ribbon,
Speaker 2: and you're gonna kind of depends how.
Speaker 1: I'm making my more duck class. That's the reason I'm
Speaker 1: freestyling fantastic.
Speaker 2: Don well, lie, you're gonna use the ribbon to kind
Speaker 2: of create a neck I've already got.
Speaker 1: Okay, sorry, sorry I am.
Speaker 2: But if you don't want to use a ribbon i'm doing,
Speaker 2: I would love to, because I'm gonna mine's not going
Speaker 2: to be a dock.
Speaker 1: The ducks aren't forbidden.
Speaker 2: No, they're not forbidden.
Speaker 1: No, I'm trying to do it rizingly.
Speaker 2: Just because we're filling rice in socks, I feel like
Speaker 2: I have got like the liberty to say, do you
Speaker 2: don't do it like that.
Speaker 1: I've made a very attractive bow, very attract It is lovely.
Speaker 2: I think your is going to be.
Speaker 1: Very special.
Speaker 2: So now we're going to give it a little bit
Speaker 2: more personality.
Speaker 1: And it's got loads of personality. But continue, We'll.
Speaker 2: Give it, we'll give it, we'll give it more. So
Speaker 2: I have provided you with Now think this might kind
Speaker 2: of counter effect your duck.
Speaker 1: No, No, I've kind of made it into more of
Speaker 1: a like beanie. Now, so this is no. Originally that
Speaker 1: was a beak, but now it's a face. So, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's the hat.
Speaker 2: Their face marvelous, So I provided you. Now, to be fair,
Speaker 2: these are much smaller than one anticipated when one purchased them.
Speaker 2: It's good, yes, leading it's online shopping from a different continent.
Speaker 2: Some things they said very big and when they arrive tiny, yeah, good.
Speaker 2: Little thing's good. And so you're going to choose which
Speaker 2: have what you want to kind of glue on glue on.
Speaker 1: Now I am a bit alarmed by this weapon. I
Speaker 1: feel that we did so much chatting about men's bottoms.
Speaker 1: I feel that I've kind of set myself up as
Speaker 1: this big, rugged alpha it. Now you've actually given me
Speaker 1: something that Scott.
Speaker 2: Like when I asking why.
Speaker 1: That's a relief? That is a really because it's a
Speaker 1: glue gun. I don't think much else would be going
Speaker 1: up after.
Speaker 2: A reverse volcano.
Speaker 1: Now it is very hot.
Speaker 2: We had queen ones who had third degree burns on
Speaker 2: her fingernail after touching the hot glue for.
Speaker 1: Just a So put a little bit of glue where on.
Speaker 2: Your on your the back of your chosen face and
Speaker 2: mouth brightenedly. You don't need a huge amount, okay, and
Speaker 2: then pop it on.
Speaker 1: Wherever I think I've not got enough glue, place it
Speaker 1: wherever you want to. Oh no, it's I told you
Speaker 1: it was not my finger, and it's really hot.
Speaker 2: A god, it was that mean?
Speaker 1: Then it is hot, isn't it It is? It's very hot.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, Sometimes you're just got to do something to
Speaker 2: find out.
Speaker 1: Hi.
Speaker 2: Okay, now I have provided strangely fashion these kind of
Speaker 2: like pemp pats out of felt and feathers.
Speaker 1: Lovely. I think I should have put more rice in mind,
Speaker 1: I don't know carry so if you like to, you
Speaker 1: can kind of.
Speaker 2: I've got mine facing away from the camera because because
Speaker 2: I would like to reveal its tiny face on its
Speaker 2: massive head. So I'm gonna I'm gonna glue my my
Speaker 2: little top pattern.
Speaker 1: Oh no, it's scarily, it's not going to hurt you.
Speaker 1: I already has.
Speaker 2: Once the first layer of skin has been burned away,
Speaker 2: there's no feeling. Oh god, this smoke everywhere. I'm ready
Speaker 2: to That's basically it, really. But you can kind of
Speaker 2: like squidge them because they feel very tactile. You can
Speaker 2: throw them against the water.
Speaker 1: One. I should have put more more rice in my
Speaker 1: mind's a little bit like it's been n.
Speaker 2: I'm going to turn mine around so you can see
Speaker 2: the beauty its face.
Speaker 1: See your one is all firm and pleasant, whereas my
Speaker 1: one is like inebriated and.
Speaker 2: Letting down on a piece of paper that I can
Speaker 2: take around. Yours is firm and pleasant. Remember if you
Speaker 2: can't get any peen, any of a gene or anything
Speaker 2: in between, the a big old crafty queen. Since we
Speaker 2: found in a bin near you, Ah beautiful my emotional
Speaker 2: support suck slash wank sock.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Well that's almost the end of the show for now,
Speaker 2: but I'm screening now. You can see our contact details.
Speaker 2: It's at the cook TV on your social media and
Speaker 2: if you want to catch up with previous episodes, and
Speaker 2: who wouldn't, you can always binge us on YouTube crying
Speaker 2: interpillow look for you in the trood anyway.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I like it. I like it. I'm not crying
Speaker 1: into any pillows. Thank you everyone for watching. What a
Speaker 1: good old timer. It's goodbye from him, It's goodbye from
Speaker 1: from them, and goodbye from me. Thank you so much
Speaker 1: for watching. Doing the card. We'll see you next week.
Speaker 1: Bye bye.
Speaker 2: I think they should play the Rainbow for