Speaker 1: You might not know this, but the first Batman movie
Speaker 1: came out thirty six years ago, Dan, And there's a
Speaker 1: bunch of cool facts I found about that Batman movie
Speaker 1: that I wasn't aware of. Like they wanted Mel Gibson
Speaker 1: to be Batman. What okay, No way, that wouldn't have worked.
Speaker 2: I mean we would if if he would have done it.
Speaker 2: We'd say the same thing about Michael Keaton. You know
Speaker 2: who actually got the part. It doesn't seem right. I
Speaker 2: don't see Batman with a mullet, but what of right?
Speaker 1: The mullet? Yeah, and the who remind me who played
Speaker 1: the Batman in that was Michael Michael Keaton. He played
Speaker 1: it in the first couple ones.
Speaker 2: In the first one, and then I don't know about
Speaker 2: Batman too. Maybe he returns, right yeah, yeah, yeah, he
Speaker 2: also did this, so yeah, he did the first two.
Speaker 2: And then that's when it started getting weird.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, I was trying to look because there's so
Speaker 1: many versions. Yeah, I think Batman nineteen eighty nine, Jack Nicholson,
Speaker 1: Michael Keating. So he did it in a couple right, yeah. Uh,
Speaker 1: he might have been good. I mean that was we
Speaker 1: weren't too far.
Speaker 2: There's dead dead air alarm.
Speaker 1: There was hold on resetting that was fresh off the
Speaker 1: Mad Max. Uh do you think the Batman mel Gibson?
Speaker 1: Mel Gibson, Yes, And as mel Gibson has been on.
Speaker 2: A lot lately because they've been running a marathon, a
Speaker 2: fucking lethal weapon, right, I was trying to figure out
Speaker 2: all right, because I was like, okay, well, for at
Speaker 2: least in my world, lethal Weapon was where mel Gibson
Speaker 2: got his start, because I really, well, for me, it
Speaker 2: was because I wasn't I was too young when Mad
Speaker 2: Max came out, and my parents they weren't big into
Speaker 2: that sort of kind of movie or whatever. Probably just
Speaker 2: thought it was weird and I'm not gonna watch this
Speaker 2: or whatever. So I was trying to think, well, what
Speaker 2: did mel Gibson do before Lethal Weapon? Well, it was
Speaker 2: Mad Max, and I was like, well, what else did
Speaker 2: he What else did he do? And I couldn't think
Speaker 2: of anything else that he's done that's notable.
Speaker 1: He did all the Mad Max before he did Lethal Weapons,
Speaker 1: for sure, for Thunderdome, Mad Max two, the original, but
Speaker 1: that's about it. I couldn't think of any other movies
Speaker 1: aside from the Mad Max movies that he did that
Speaker 1: stuck out into my head. He did nine other movies
Speaker 1: besides the Mad Max movies before he did, not that
Speaker 1: you would know them, but before he did the Lethal Weapons.
Speaker 2: Okay, okay, so you could make the.
Speaker 1: Argument that he was established.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, yeah doing those nine maybe not no movies.
Speaker 2: Mad Max was definitely huge, franchise huge, So I'll give
Speaker 2: him that for me, though, it was it was the
Speaker 2: leath of Weapon that did it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Mad Max. It made so much money. Yeah. The
Speaker 1: budget for the first one was four hundred thousand dollars.
Speaker 1: It made one hundred million. Wow, that isn't a success.
Speaker 1: That's a blockbuster. Oh yeah right, and then the other
Speaker 1: ones were ten million dollars and made thirty.
Speaker 2: Six Okay, still making money or whatever, but not near
Speaker 2: as not as big as the first plight like cow one. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, So he was definitely on the scene by the
Speaker 1: time that they were like, hey, we want you to
Speaker 1: do Batman.
Speaker 2: Right, He's like sor right, I gotta take a break. Ye.
Speaker 1: They wanted Michael J. Fox or Eddie Murphy as Robin
Speaker 1: and John Lithgow as the Joker. Did you say Eddie
Speaker 1: Murphy as I did what the fast? I've never worked,
Speaker 1: but I think Michael J. Fox would work absolutely, and
Speaker 1: even wanted Bill Murray at one point as Batman WHOA
Speaker 1: no me be my friend?
Speaker 2: Yeah, I couldn't see that. Bill Murray is a good
Speaker 2: comedic actor.
Speaker 1: He's a good serious actor.
Speaker 2: I'm trying to think of anything I say him as serious.
Speaker 1: I mean when he's not being like the character in
Speaker 1: Caddie Shack.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 1: Uh, what's the movie he does with Scarlett Johansson lost
Speaker 1: in translation?
Speaker 2: I have never seen that one.
Speaker 1: It's a pretty it's a pretty good movie. Okay, Artie farts.
Speaker 1: He probably wouldn't like it. Yeah, let's see what's another
Speaker 1: one here. Uh. They spoke to David Kronberg about directing.
Speaker 1: He was just coming off the success with Pee Wee Herman.
Speaker 1: They spoke to Tim Burton. Tim Burton said he'd take
Speaker 1: the job if he and his artist girlfriend Julia Hickson
Speaker 1: could rewrite the script.
Speaker 2: Oh god, I make it a weird Tim Burton film.
Speaker 1: He did, He did do it, he did the next,
Speaker 1: he did.
Speaker 2: The second, the other one.
Speaker 1: Yes, okay, yeah, So they wrote thirty page rewrite and
Speaker 1: then they had another screenplay writer to help write it
Speaker 1: even more okay. Uh. And then Burton's Beetlejuice was a
Speaker 1: hitch hit, huge hit, and they went, yeah, this feels fine.
Speaker 2: Yeah right.
Speaker 1: They just thought he was a weird kid, and then
Speaker 1: you know, his Beetlejuice is huge and they go, okay,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna give us some of that beetlejuice money. At
Speaker 1: one point they wanted Pierce Brosnan to be Batman.
Speaker 2: That feels logical, Yeah, yeah, because he's always kind of
Speaker 2: played that. I mean, he was a bond guy. He
Speaker 2: was a Bond for a while, all right, and even
Speaker 2: a Missus Dowfire. He was kind of that rich kind
Speaker 2: of guy. I could see Pierce Brosnan as a Batman.
Speaker 1: And then ultimately wanted only Tim Burton because of Beetlejuice
Speaker 1: in his chemistry with him on that, which makes sense.
Speaker 2: I didn't realize any damn Batman movies. They were I
Speaker 2: just want to regular Batman, not all this animated bullshit.
Speaker 1: Initially, they thought that having Keaton on didn't make sense
Speaker 1: because they thought that Tim Burton was trying to make
Speaker 1: it a comedy. And they almost fired Tim Burton because
Speaker 1: they believe that. Okay, there were fifty thousand letters of
Speaker 1: protests sent to Warner Brothers in frustration that Michael Keaton
Speaker 1: was gonna be Batman.
Speaker 2: God why I thought he was a great Batman, but at.
Speaker 1: The time he was mister Mom beetlejuice. True, mister Mom
Speaker 1: was the best. Keaton did research into bats lived alone
Speaker 1: in London for a year. I guess that helps when
Speaker 1: you're trying to get ready to play. Yeah, they Burton
Speaker 1: and Keaton discussed at length how Bruce Wayne would keep
Speaker 1: his identity secret. Ultimately, Keaton decided to perform Batman's voice
Speaker 1: at a lower register than Bruce Wayne. This has now
Speaker 1: become a staple of screen portrayals of the character.
Speaker 2: I think Christian Bale took it to a whole other level.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but even when he was doing Batman, Michael Keaton,
Speaker 1: it still felt like you were I'm Batman. You knew,
Speaker 1: Michael Keaton. Yeah, Keaton came up with the Batman line.
Speaker 1: The line in the script was I am the Night,
Speaker 1: but Keaton felt like I am Batman made more sense.
Speaker 2: It does make more sense because I mean, this is
Speaker 2: a movie, but this isn't The Dark Knight. It was
Speaker 2: The Dark Knight Rises, right, It just makes sense.
Speaker 1: Who are you and Batman? Uh? And they they met
Speaker 1: with Jack Nicholson to be the joker, but they also
Speaker 1: met with William Dafoe and they were leaning towards William
Speaker 1: Dafoe decided they wanted Jack Nicholson and then uh Nicholson
Speaker 1: was like, I'm not that interested now, and they had
Speaker 1: to convince him.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Willem Dafoe, he's got a funny look at face,
Speaker 2: So I can see why it's crazy why they'd want
Speaker 2: to put him in there on that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's a good crazy actor. If you need someone
Speaker 1: to be crazy, he can make that happen.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I think he was more And maybe he did
Speaker 2: play this part Doc Doc Doc doctor Octopus, you know
Speaker 2: from one of the other confers spider Man. Ye didn't
Speaker 2: he play I didn't, will or was he the green Gomblin?
Speaker 1: I think he was the green Goblin either way.
Speaker 2: I mean he fits that because it's got a weird look,
Speaker 2: because he's got a funny looking he's got a villain face. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: didn't play the villain and platoon, right, Willem Defoe didn't.
Speaker 1: No, No, he sure didn't. But he played that rigid
Speaker 1: looking guy that. Yeah. Tim Burton wanted Robin Williams to
Speaker 1: be the Joker, met with him, Robin Williams agreed to
Speaker 1: be the Joker, and then when one of the heads
Speaker 1: heard about it, they went back to Nicholson and said
Speaker 1: he was about to lose the part. Nicholson agreed to
Speaker 1: be in the film, and then Robin Williams refused to
Speaker 1: work with Warner Brothers again until they apologized.
Speaker 2: Wow, because he was promised a spot and then got
Speaker 2: a yank daf monter.
Speaker 1: Yeah, because when Jack Nicholson was like, eh, I don't know,
Speaker 1: and so they went searching again found Robin Williams and
Speaker 1: then Williams was screwed over. He was screwed over so
Speaker 1: bad that when they did Aladdin he didn't want to
Speaker 1: do it and he said, listen, I'll do it, but
Speaker 1: I have the rights to any to the genie in
Speaker 1: anything I say. It's all me. That's why you can't
Speaker 1: hear if you go to Disney or you see Disney rides,
Speaker 1: you don't get to hear those lines. Makes sense because
Speaker 1: he has the had or has as a state does
Speaker 1: the rights to those lines.
Speaker 2: Which he weighed a perfect genie. He made the movie, Yeah,
Speaker 2: he sure did. And I don't think Rob Williams is
Speaker 2: cynical enough right to pull off a villain like the Joker.
Speaker 2: I think Jack Nicholson was a perfect fit. He's a
Speaker 2: great dramatic actor. Look at his track record. Yeah, okay,
Speaker 2: he's kind of got that, you know, look amongst them anyway,
Speaker 2: and uh yeah, I just don't think rober Williams could
Speaker 2: have pulled it off. He probably would have gotten fired
Speaker 2: halfway through and been like, Jack, we need you.
Speaker 1: Nicholson hated being the Joker. It would take him two
Speaker 1: hours to become the Joker with makeup. He hated it
Speaker 1: so much he brought in tapes of baseball games to
Speaker 1: keep him entertained.
Speaker 2: Makes sense.
Speaker 1: I don't know that sounds boring. If you're sitting in
Speaker 1: a fucking makeup chair for two hours, you gotta do something,
Speaker 1: and you're not gonna watch movies because you do movies,
Speaker 1: right exactly, So baseball games makes sense.
Speaker 3: But no, it doesn't make sense to watch baseball games
Speaker 3: that you probably.
Speaker 1: Are no no tapes. Listen, oh, listen to tape. Uh
Speaker 1: that's the way I interpret it.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I thought it was you know VHS.
Speaker 1: I mean it was eighty nine, so VHS was pretty
Speaker 1: not common. Oh it was very common.
Speaker 3: Now you watched VHS, that's how you watch movies.
Speaker 2: We got our first VCR in eighty seven, eighty eight.
Speaker 3: But I would think that he I mean, why wouldn't
Speaker 3: you want to watch like stand up comedy or something.
Speaker 1: Like that, you know, Yeah, I don't know if I
Speaker 1: don't know if they had a lot of stand up
Speaker 1: comedy on VHS.
Speaker 2: Right, a lot of that stuff was pressed on album
Speaker 2: and shit like that, So you'd have to learn.
Speaker 3: That, like you could listen to any podcasts or anything.
Speaker 1: No, no, uh, let's see what's the next one. Nicholson
Speaker 1: would give away his Joker gloves as sign gifts. Costume
Speaker 1: designer was very frustrated, and so they kept having to
Speaker 1: make more for Jack Nicholson and they promised he would stop,
Speaker 1: but he never did. They said he remade the gloves
Speaker 1: over one hundred times.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'll stop. Giving him a Wii. I
Speaker 2: wonder how much something like that's worth. And autographed Joe
Speaker 2: Gers set of Joker gloves autographed from the Joker himself. Yeah,
Speaker 2: that's pretty awesome.
Speaker 3: Well, you remember he did warn what was his name
Speaker 3: that died after playing the Joker?
Speaker 1: Heith Ledger.
Speaker 3: Yes, he warned him that, you know, playing the joker
Speaker 3: is going to take a lot out of you, and
Speaker 3: you don't probably don't want to do it.
Speaker 1: Jack Nicholson received a percentage of the gross of the film,
Speaker 1: and due to its massive take, he made sixty million dollars.
Speaker 1: Sheelle Pfeiffer was asked to audition to play Vicky Vale.
Speaker 1: She was dating Michael Keaton at the time, though so declined.
Speaker 1: She returned for the sequel, of course as Catwoman. Right, yeah,
Speaker 1: it's just so good because what was she a been.
Speaker 2: She would have been with that blonde reporter gall or
Speaker 2: whatever that fail, Yeah.
Speaker 1: Vicky Bail, Yeah yeah, yeah, that was played.
Speaker 2: By that broad that we were supposed to you know what,
Speaker 2: the fucking Jerry what's her nuts? Jerry Hall whatever?
Speaker 1: She was spposed to be Vicky Vale in that?
Speaker 2: Isn't she the one who was?
Speaker 3: No, no, no, Vicky Vale was played by Alec Baldwin's
Speaker 3: ex wife, m.
Speaker 1: I was trying to look and see the other things
Speaker 1: that what was she in at the time that got
Speaker 1: her the notoriety to be in the in that.
Speaker 2: Movie so far as Michelle Fiffer, yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, because a lot of her stuff came after that,
Speaker 1: if I remember correctly, Kim basing Kim.
Speaker 2: Because it all played Alisha Hunt wherever the fuck it.
Speaker 1: Is, because she was in Greece to sure, Okay, Michelle
Speaker 1: Pfiffer was she was in Greece too. Oh Scarface Okay, yeah,
Speaker 1: Michelle Pfiffer was the girlfriend in Scarface.
Speaker 2: That makes sense. And that was a huge, massive movie,
Speaker 2: which is of Eastwick, which was a big movie.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah with Jack Nicholson.
Speaker 1: Okay, yeah, so she was on her way up as well.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Uh.
Speaker 1: Sean Young who I don't even know that was cast
Speaker 1: as Vicky Vale. She broke her collar bone practicing horse
Speaker 1: riding for a scene and had to drop. Burton had
Speaker 1: earlier been speaking with Kim Basinger. She received an emergency
Speaker 1: call one week before filming and took the part Don
Speaker 1: Johnson Ray Laota, Uh, we're all considered for the part
Speaker 1: of Harvey Dent. Burton woned ray Liota, but he was
Speaker 1: in talks to make Good Fellows at the time.
Speaker 2: Makes sense.
Speaker 1: They approached Billy D Williams. He took the role on
Speaker 1: the condition if it was written into his contract he'd
Speaker 1: returned to play two Face. When Warner Brothers was casting
Speaker 1: for Batman Forever. They had to buy Williams contract out
Speaker 1: to hire Tommy Lee Jones.
Speaker 2: Which I think Tommy Lee Jones did a pretty good jobs.
Speaker 2: Two face, I can't I can't picture Billy Dee Williams.
Speaker 1: Tim Burton had dyslexia, didn't read any Batman comics to
Speaker 1: understand the mythology. He studied Joker on original story The
Speaker 1: Killing Joke. Burton said it was the only comic book
Speaker 1: not hindered by his dyslexia. Tim Burton is in the
Speaker 1: movie in a cameo. He plays one of the Joker's
Speaker 1: squad goons.
Speaker 2: Okay, they seem like that happens a lot like the
Speaker 2: creators of the movie. That some directors did that. They
Speaker 2: find their way in there.
Speaker 1: Shyamalan does it, Tarantino does it. Yeah, yeah yeah. The
Speaker 1: Joker's name is revealed as Jack Napier. This was made
Speaker 1: up for the film, as they play on the word
Speaker 1: jack Knap's, an old English term for an idiot who
Speaker 1: looks like an ape. Wow. Bob Ringwood designed the batsuit.
Speaker 1: Burton's brief was no tights or spas Greenwood studied two
Speaker 1: hundred plus comic books twenty eight suits, twenty five capes
Speaker 1: and six cowls were created at a cost of two
Speaker 1: hundred and fifty thousand dollars.
Speaker 2: That makes sense because if you look at like the
Speaker 2: Batman television series with Adam West h with his times
Speaker 2: and his fucking yes, and if you want to make
Speaker 2: it a masterpiece and separate it away from you know
Speaker 2: what we know of Batman, totally don't want to go
Speaker 2: with that.
Speaker 1: They wanted a pop soundtrack to be written for the movie.
Speaker 1: They spoke to George Michael, they spoke to Michael Jackson.
Speaker 1: Neither one would commit, and so then they went to Prince.
Speaker 2: Prince said, I'll do it.
Speaker 1: Makes sense, right, yeah, bad dance, Yeah. And then they
Speaker 1: had the mobile design and they took inspiration from comic
Speaker 1: books and from Malcolm Campbell's Bluebird, which set the land
Speaker 1: speed record in nineteen thirty five, as inspiration.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I see this, Malcolm Campbell.
Speaker 1: You said, here's the car if you want to see it.
Speaker 1: That's that the land speed record.
Speaker 2: Okay, I can see it now.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's what it looked like. And then obviously that's.
Speaker 2: What they Yeah, and then that motherfucker has changed so
Speaker 2: much over the years. The Batmobile Yeah, I.
Speaker 1: Think it's fascinating that they, like comic book movies now
Speaker 1: get so much like Oh, comic book movies, they're resurgence.
Speaker 1: Batman Man been around, been doing it for a long
Speaker 1: ev nine. Yeah, nineteen eighty nine.
Speaker 2: But other than the Batman, Superman, Batman and Superman were
Speaker 2: the only comic book movies at that time that I
Speaker 2: can think of. You didn't see ant Man in nineteen
Speaker 2: eighty nine. Hell, even the seventies, because is that when
Speaker 2: the first Superman came out, was in like seventy eight,
Speaker 2: seventy nine something like that, the very first Superman movie.
Speaker 1: These are the Batman, I'm sorry. These are the comic
Speaker 1: book movies of the nineties, Okay, Batman and Robin, The
Speaker 1: Crow Blade, Phantom, Teenage Mutant, Ninja tur Urdles, Dark Man,
Speaker 1: Batman Returns, Dick Tracy, The Mask, Spawn, Judge, Dread, The Rocketeer,
Speaker 1: Barbed Wire, which was a comic book Yeah, Batman Forever,
Speaker 1: The Shadow, Blank Man, Mighty Morphin, Power Rangers, Mystery Man,
Speaker 1: The Fantastic Four, Tank Girl, which, yeah, that was for sure,
Speaker 1: The maskazorro Those were all nineties comic book movies.
Speaker 2: I didn't really There's a few of them I didn't
Speaker 2: realize were comic book movies. I didn't realize the mask
Speaker 2: was a comic book movie. I K whow about spawn?
Speaker 2: All right, that's interesting.
Speaker 1: How about that though? Huh? This is the other thing
Speaker 1: I had When I asked lindsay what story she wanted?
Speaker 1: This was the Disney story.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah.
Speaker 1: Man arrested after marrying nine year old girl at one
Speaker 1: hundred and fifty thousand dollars Disneyland wedding. Damn, didn't know
Speaker 1: you could do Disney weddings at Disney makes sense? Why
Speaker 1: can't you.
Speaker 3: I have a cousin who got married there.
Speaker 1: Really amazing. Yeah, that's amazing. You have someone that was
Speaker 1: married there one hundred and fifty thousand dollars apparently to
Speaker 1: do it. This happened at Disneyland, Paris, and apparently when
Speaker 1: they were unaware that the bride was nine year old
Speaker 1: girl who was accompanied by her mother on the day
Speaker 1: in question, they were said to take place on Saturday,
Speaker 1: the staff was not psyched. They alerted the authorities on
Speaker 1: what they thought was happening. The young girl's mom was
Speaker 1: there and other members of her family were intendants as well.
Speaker 1: In addition, up to one hundred guests.
Speaker 2: Damn. So there's a lot of people that knew that
Speaker 2: this guy was going to be married in a nine
Speaker 2: year old.
Speaker 1: Apparently, it's since been revealed that the whole thing was staged,
Speaker 1: as the girl's mother said she wanted her daughter to
Speaker 1: feel like a princess for the day.
Speaker 2: A Meanwhile, the groom is like, oh.
Speaker 1: The prosecutor said, so it wasn't a wedding but a
Speaker 1: staged wedding filmed with around one hundred extras. They hired
Speaker 1: Disneyland Paris, pretending it was a real wedding. It said.
Speaker 1: The whole thing was going to be broadcast on social media.
Speaker 1: It appears, though, as if the man wasn't genuinely going
Speaker 1: to wed the nine year old and that was all
Speaker 1: a ruse. The man's criminal history has since been revealed.
Speaker 1: Prosecutors say the groom or groomer is believed to be
Speaker 1: a thirty nine year old man who has been known
Speaker 1: in Britain for sexual offenses against miners.
Speaker 2: Oh God, that's not helping anything.
Speaker 1: He is registered on the British Sex Offenders Registry and
Speaker 1: currently wanted at the national level by the judicial authorities
Speaker 1: for failing to comply with the obligations arising from the registration.
Speaker 1: He's been hailed as the mastermind of the bizarre plan,
Speaker 1: but reportedly there were some nationals that helped organize it.
Speaker 1: The groom is one of the people that was arrested,
Speaker 1: the child's mother. Another woman was also arrested who was
Speaker 1: supposed to be the bride's sister, and a fifty five
Speaker 1: year old man was taken part in the ceremony was
Speaker 1: also taken into custody.
Speaker 2: I wonder how that came about. Putting out an ad
Speaker 2: looking for an older man to marry my young daughter
Speaker 2: at Disneyland and make her feel like a princess.
Speaker 1: Wow. Meanwhile, oh, let's let's feel it back even more.
Speaker 1: I'm looking for a job with some kind of jobs
Speaker 1: are a villa, here's one. We need someone to act
Speaker 1: in a in a performance.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I did a little bit of acting when
Speaker 2: I was in high school.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and it looks like, let's see the performance is
Speaker 1: marrying a nine year old. Hey, I know nine year olds.
Speaker 1: I have I have some connection of working with children,
Speaker 1: right because he's on the sex registry right.
Speaker 2: Right, Like he said, I know nine year olds, not
Speaker 2: like I like nine year olds.
Speaker 1: That changed also fair to say, right, exactly what was
Speaker 1: the interview process? Like? Was he the only candidate?
Speaker 2: Right? Well, nobody else has responded to this ad in
Speaker 2: the past two weeks. Uh, you're hired.
Speaker 1: And as a somebody on the sex redustry like maybe
Speaker 1: it was blind a blind item. And so he's like,
Speaker 1: what's the what is the acting? I get to go
Speaker 1: to Disneyland Paris?
Speaker 2: Oh then nice, nice OI.
Speaker 1: Sounds good? Yeah? I almost said craiky, right, And then
Speaker 1: it was like, hey, man, there's there's a nine year
Speaker 1: old oi. Not hey winker you twat yes word the.
Speaker 4: County judicial system because I talked to some some yappers, right, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1: You had a chance to get out of the deal.
Speaker 2: You had plenty of opportunity to get out of it.
Speaker 2: But hey, it's okay because it was staged. It was real, right,
Speaker 2: Oh no, that shouldn't even be stayed. There's plenty of
Speaker 2: other ways to make your daughter feel like a princess
Speaker 2: without having to marry her off to some creepy old man.
Speaker 1: For it, fake even fake, maybe fake marry another nine
Speaker 1: year old. That's just an idea.
Speaker 2: There you go. Yeah, yeah, what's the oldest you could
Speaker 2: go on that sort of thing I could like, no, no, no, no,
Speaker 2: Like if you're marrying your daughter, your nine year old
Speaker 2: fake ceremoniey right, you don't want to go thirty nine
Speaker 2: year old. Yeah that makes no sense, right, you know
Speaker 2: nine obviously somebody her age.
Speaker 1: But you know, well, let's do this. You're trying to
Speaker 1: like emulate the story, yeah right, the stories that Disney
Speaker 1: puts out of, like Prince Charming. I think you gotta go.
Speaker 2: Fiftheen That's what I was thinking, fifteen sixteen.
Speaker 1: They go to look somewhat like a Prince Charming, and
Speaker 1: a ten year old doesn't.
Speaker 3: Rightly, but a twelve year old could.
Speaker 1: No, a twelve year old does not look like prince
Speaker 1: age too.
Speaker 2: Youah, two buns of a baby face for sure.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, he's got to have some some pecks, even.
Speaker 2: Like a thirteen, maybe thirteen if they've already hit the
Speaker 2: puberty right where they getting.
Speaker 1: Like he's he's a tall thirteen year old.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, I think something like that, you know.
Speaker 1: Would the question it's all wrong, lindsay, But the question
Speaker 1: has to be, like, you got to pick one that
Speaker 1: still was within the parameters of the law, that isn't
Speaker 1: too creepy. Because reality is is that when she's eighteen, right,
Speaker 1: he'll be twenty two. It's not that crazy, right, nothing
Speaker 1: over five years, So fourteen, Yeah, you're good with fourteen.
Speaker 1: We tucked into it.
Speaker 2: Okay, Yeah, come.
Speaker 1: Around, girl's too much her faster than they do. They do, No,
Speaker 1: they don't.
Speaker 3: Uh.
Speaker 1: And then there's the whole extra showing up like oh,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be an extra, I get to go to Disney.
Speaker 1: Yeah that sounds awesome, and you're like, just stand here
Speaker 1: at a wedding You're like, sweet, okay, d what the
Speaker 1: fuck is nine? Is she a flower girl? Is that
Speaker 1: the that's the flower girl? Why is the flower girl
Speaker 1: wearing a wedding dress?
Speaker 2: That's the bride? Isn't she beautiful?
Speaker 3: No?
Speaker 2: Sure, she looks so majestic on her special.
Speaker 1: They should arrest all those people were in compliance, every
Speaker 1: last one of them, even the extras. That's what I'm saying,
Speaker 1: Like the ex nobody's like, hey, time out, yes, yes,
Speaker 1: sorry to be that guy.
Speaker 2: Arrest the people who at Disney, who allowed it, who
Speaker 2: booked it and said.
Speaker 1: Yeah that's fine, saw a paycheck?
Speaker 2: Sure, come on in every last one of them. The
Speaker 2: only one that shouldn't be arrested. Is the guy running
Speaker 2: a roller coast because he just showed up for it?
Speaker 1: How much do you have to make is an extra
Speaker 1: to turn the other cheek.
Speaker 2: It's just a one day event, right, Yeah, a couple
Speaker 2: of hours.
Speaker 1: Yeah, a couple thousand.
Speaker 2: Oh fifteen twenty five hundred thousand thousand.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm going with nothing. I'm saying so I don't
Speaker 1: give a shit. That's fucked up.
Speaker 2: Man, take your money, Shut the fuck up, right now.
Speaker 2: You take your money and then go to the police,
Speaker 2: like you would not believe what I was just Well,
Speaker 2: you can't say that came.
Speaker 1: I was just that part of I tried to leave.
Speaker 2: Yeah, they would, They would not let me.
Speaker 1: They kept adding a comma. Well if that's the case,
Speaker 1: then and I'm going to give some of it to charity, right,
Speaker 1: We're gonna fight human trafficking.
Speaker 2: With the portion of my proceeds.
Speaker 1: Almost raise money to fight trafficking. I gotta tell you
Speaker 1: what happened to me Father's Day. I went to the
Speaker 1: grocery store to get some stuff and then left, and
Speaker 1: as I was leaving, they were set up in front
Speaker 1: of woman. I fucking hate this. Oh yeah, I can't
Speaker 1: stand when they do this, and it was this woman
Speaker 1: and she was like sir thir and you're like ah fuck,
Speaker 1: and you're like, yeah, yeah, I'm fine. And she was like, uh,
Speaker 1: would you like to make a donation? Just stop teen suicide?
Speaker 1: And you're like ah fuck. And I could not bring
Speaker 1: it in me to be like fuck them fucking kids,
Speaker 1: girl scouts. I got no problem, like plenty of beer, fine,
Speaker 1: you're benefitting from that, yeah, yeah, yeah, but nine times
Speaker 1: out of ten I do not stop. And she was like, hey, no, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: you like teen suicide. Would you like to help stop?
Speaker 1: And You're like, well, fuck, I'm not for.
Speaker 2: It, right, because if you say now, then it seems
Speaker 2: like you are for it. Yeah.
Speaker 1: And I have a I'm sensitive to suicide and I
Speaker 1: try to be and and so I was like okay.
Speaker 1: I was like, tell me what we're doing. And she
Speaker 1: was like do this thing. And here's all these tears,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, can I just make donation? I don't
Speaker 1: have cash. She's like, we take credit card. I'm like, fuck,
Speaker 1: of course you do, yeah, cash, of course you have
Speaker 1: square right, And so she shows me this thing and
Speaker 1: I'm like, listen, I don't want anything. I don't need
Speaker 1: a fucking thermos. Right, I don't need a fucking bottle opener.
Speaker 1: I don't need a fucking fan advisor. I don't need
Speaker 1: none of shit. Can I just make a donation? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Twenty five? And I'm like ten. Now you're negotiating with
Speaker 1: her because the first tier was like twenty five bucks
Speaker 1: or some shit. I was like, get the fuck out
Speaker 1: of here. And so she has to do the thing,
Speaker 1: and then so I have to sign. She's like, here's something.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I don't know the buck. Yeah, I forgot
Speaker 1: all about it, right, go home. Like two days later,
Speaker 1: I was like, hey, what's this fucking charge for ten dollars?
Speaker 1: And I was like yeah. I was like it's it's
Speaker 1: Father's Day. And I'm walking out of the grocery store
Speaker 1: and the lady's like, hey, are you four teenage suicide?
Speaker 2: I'm like, hell no, your lesson has been learned. Next
Speaker 2: time they say are you four teenage suicide? And fucking
Speaker 2: are right I am? And keep on.
Speaker 1: I used to try and do fake hey you know
Speaker 1: asl right. I got burned on that he didn't dang
Speaker 1: any dang sir, But yeah he did dang dan.
Speaker 2: She was like, sir, that's terrible.
Speaker 1: I just grabbed my groceries and ran.
Speaker 2: That's all you can. Yeah, I got no problem telling them, mofuckers,
Speaker 2: no man, girl scouts Team suicide. We're just trying to
Speaker 2: raise money for our youth football team. I'm sorry, I'm poor.
Speaker 2: I got nothing for you.
Speaker 1: Have you seen have you seen the Ricky Gervaise. It's
Speaker 1: one of the shows I forget which one he's on.
Speaker 1: And he's walking through and they're like, would you like
Speaker 1: to help hungry kids and blue? And he's like no,
Speaker 1: and the guy starts like persuading him, and he's like,
Speaker 1: who the fuck are you to guilt me? I'm totally paraphrasing,
Speaker 1: who the fuck are you to guilt me? When you're
Speaker 1: getting paid to be out here? You're no fucking saint, right,
Speaker 1: So like fuck off or whatever. And then he walks
Speaker 1: in some other person's asking for money, and he turns
Speaker 1: around and takes money and puts in the tin and
Speaker 1: flips the guy off.
Speaker 2: Nice. Nice.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, so I did my part. So if suddenly
Speaker 1: teen Suicide just evaporates off the plate face of the earth,
Speaker 1: you know, it's my ten dollars and forty cents way
Speaker 1: to go. Corbyn that sealed the deal to make sure
Speaker 1: that like we were all good for forever. All right, guys,
Speaker 1: have a fantastic week, and we will not have a
Speaker 1: show next week for two weeks. We won't have a
Speaker 1: best podcast.
Speaker 2: For two weeks, yes right, because we'll all be on.
Speaker 1: Weird book vacation rotation. So you guys have a great week.
Speaker 2: Bye bye,