Speaker 1: Welcome to Dad's One Day.
Speaker 2: Clok.
Speaker 3: Parental discussion is advised mature content beyond this point.
Speaker 4: Hey, you guys know how to make a waterbed bouncier.
Speaker 4: You said spring water to it? Was that one of
Speaker 4: your jokes too before? Maybe maybe now I'm judging myself
Speaker 4: every joke I find, I'm like, maybe Stones said this one.
Speaker 4: Maybe Stone said there's so many.
Speaker 5: There there was like one hundred and.
Speaker 4: Hundred plus one hundred plus and thirty.
Speaker 3: Why we haven't said that one yet?
Speaker 4: I didn't think so. I didn't think we.
Speaker 3: I think we had one that had something about spring
Speaker 3: in your step.
Speaker 4: But he pulls out his roll the decks. Actually we
Speaker 4: had six that had something to do with.
Speaker 5: Spring, spring forward, spring fever, spring penis. Let me go
Speaker 5: back to spring penis.
Speaker 3: Wait, we're back on That looks like my porn search.
Speaker 5: No. I just looked up spring in the search bar
Speaker 5: and nothing came up. We're clear Dad's Day will first.
Speaker 4: Let's go Dad's on Day Quill Episode one sixty four,
Speaker 4: Dome can't figure out how to mute his mic while
Speaker 4: he's coughing. I'm known, I'm dom, I'm still baby, all right.
Speaker 4: So we got a nice Little Sunday Evening. Stoned is exhausted.
Speaker 4: Dome is probably also exhausted. I think I'm the only
Speaker 4: one that hasn't traveled this weekend. I did a lot
Speaker 4: of Disneyland research, if that counts for anything.
Speaker 3: But are you guys are going to make that a reality?
Speaker 4: Yeah? Yeah, yeah, I'm actually waiting. I got a I
Speaker 4: scoured different ways to find some kind of discounts and
Speaker 4: make things worth it. I was talking to Stone, I
Speaker 4: want to do Universal, but it's just being vetoed that
Speaker 4: we should probably just do Disney for now, which I'm
Speaker 4: okay with because I do love Disney. It's just a
Speaker 4: lot more money. But at this point it's you know,
Speaker 4: I have to realize, like I have the money to
Speaker 4: be able to fund that vacation, which is nice to have, yeah,
Speaker 4: and be able to create the memories with everybody. The
Speaker 4: last time I was at Disneyland, my son, who just
Speaker 4: turned seventeen, was almost turning five, so it's been a
Speaker 4: long time. I'm but yeah, So I got a Disney
Speaker 4: card and I'm waiting for that to come in so
Speaker 4: I can book it on there and get points and
Speaker 4: discounts from it. It's like a so smart yeah, and
Speaker 4: then and you can't you can't even book your tickets
Speaker 4: for Disneyland until one hundred and eighty days out anyway,
Speaker 4: So that's like in the first second week of June
Speaker 4: that we.
Speaker 3: Can do this. You can get one of the season passes.
Speaker 3: You can do the season pass and.
Speaker 4: Then I'm not doing that, but that's no speaking to that,
Speaker 4: so I am going to do the upgrade. So back
Speaker 4: in the day, they used to have fast passes, right, yeah,
Speaker 4: and now they have what's called the multipe multi pass
Speaker 4: right multipas, but but they have two different ones, actually three,
Speaker 4: so they have a standard which only allows you to
Speaker 4: do like you have to go get it every time
Speaker 4: you want to do the pass, right, you have to
Speaker 4: purchase it. Then they have the multi pass I can't
Speaker 4: remember the term they call it, but basically, you get
Speaker 4: whatever the rides listed for that pass that day. You
Speaker 4: get one ride her day with that pass at a
Speaker 4: time that you set, so you have to set the
Speaker 4: time they make another one. But you can only buy
Speaker 4: this two days before your visit and it's very limited. Okay,
Speaker 4: the other one I just told you about is a
Speaker 4: thirty five dollars upgrade. The other one is you don't
Speaker 4: have to set a time, and that's the only difference.
Speaker 4: You still get to do one ride or one time
Speaker 4: per ride, but you don't have to set a time.
Speaker 4: You can just show up and get to the front
Speaker 4: of the line. Any guesses on the jump of price
Speaker 4: from thirty five to this, and you have to buy it.
Speaker 4: You have to buy it two days prior. And it's
Speaker 4: a very limited amount, okay, Stone. The average price is
Speaker 4: between three and four hundred dollars per ticket.
Speaker 5: And I'm like, what pay for it?
Speaker 4: Snorting coke off my dick for that price and sucking.
Speaker 5: And it's mostly just baby formula.
Speaker 4: Like Jack, we did have to second the second he
Speaker 4: sniffs that that tickle feeling. I'm gonna right when you
Speaker 4: look at me, you're not gonna is it?
Speaker 3: Is it?
Speaker 4: Come?
Speaker 5: Is?
Speaker 4: It is a coke?
Speaker 5: What's all over his face is a snob.
Speaker 3: If you're his little fucking whiskers are gonna go in
Speaker 3: your asshole.
Speaker 5: How did you sneeze, Oliver? Mickey Mouse? He pulled my
Speaker 5: ball hair. I don't know what else to tell you.
Speaker 3: I wonder why nobody tried to bribe Mickey with cheese
Speaker 3: at any point in his lifetime.
Speaker 5: I think it's considered racist.
Speaker 4: Original racism.
Speaker 3: He is, he was original racism. He started off as
Speaker 3: a fucking steamboat captain. Applies that mouse steamboat captain, who's
Speaker 3: a mouse steamboat slavery slaves came over on steamboat, right.
Speaker 4: I don't think that's how that.
Speaker 6: Too big.
Speaker 4: Well we're here other than that, my my, I'll get
Speaker 4: to the rest of my week, and then we'll turn
Speaker 4: it over to you gents. But I am getting old,
Speaker 4: and I found more proof of this in not a
Speaker 4: way that I want. And it was so simple. So
Speaker 4: we were putting my daughter, my oldest daughter, to bed,
Speaker 4: and my wife's gonna read to her. So I lay
Speaker 4: down on the floor waiting my turn because I have
Speaker 4: to put her to bed. So if that's the term.
Speaker 4: My wife reads a book and then she leaves the room.
Speaker 4: I get into bed, I read a book, and then
Speaker 4: she falls asleep. Go out of the room. Well, she
Speaker 4: fell asleep while reading with my wife. So I go
Speaker 4: to get up, and I get on my knees and
Speaker 4: I'm trying to adjust her sound machine and stuff like that.
Speaker 4: All of a sudden, I go to stand up and
Speaker 4: I can't stand up. I can't put weight on my
Speaker 4: right leg at all. I'm like, what is going on?
Speaker 4: Like it hurts like right on my butt, like right
Speaker 4: above my butt, and I'm thinking like sciatic right, And
Speaker 4: like I hobble barely out to the living room, sit down,
Speaker 4: put heat on it for a while, try stretching all
Speaker 4: this other stuff. My wife has to help me to
Speaker 4: the room to go to bed. The next morning, I'm
Speaker 4: able to walk for enough to get it loosened up
Speaker 4: and I go see a chiropractor. So it was like,
Speaker 4: I guess it was my sourciliatic spot in your pelvis.
Speaker 4: And what he said is sometimes I can just tighten up.
Speaker 4: And when it tightens up, he goes, basically, you're you're
Speaker 4: done for Like your body like shuts down that area.
Speaker 4: You can't put weight on your foot like you like
Speaker 4: it literally just collapsed. I'm like, that's exactly what happened.
Speaker 4: So I got all stretched and chiropractic stuff and felt
Speaker 4: old as shit. But man, I also said I have
Speaker 4: neck and shoulder issues because I do, and I have
Speaker 4: terrible sleep habits. And he popped my neck, and oh
Speaker 4: my god, it felt so good the first time he did.
Speaker 4: He goes, did you get any tingling down your arms.
Speaker 4: I'm like no, and he goes, oh good, and I'm
Speaker 4: like wait.
Speaker 1: Oh, oh good.
Speaker 4: All right, let's I did it right. Let's just do
Speaker 4: the other side while we're here. Let's just get this
Speaker 4: over with. But yeah, so that that was a very weird, uh,
Speaker 4: very weird thing where it just like I wasn't doing
Speaker 4: anything special, It wasn't doing any activities. Literally laying on
Speaker 4: the floor, go to get up and somehow like pinched
Speaker 4: this area of by pelvis that I can't now get up.
Speaker 4: It was wild. It was wild.
Speaker 3: So you haven't been able to get your pelvis up
Speaker 3: for fucking months.
Speaker 4: That's the problem. And that's the exact problem is because
Speaker 4: it's it's not because I was doing activity, and that's
Speaker 4: the problem. It has to be anyway, domb how's your weekend?
Speaker 3: Long? It was? It was delightful though. We had Lily's birthday,
Speaker 3: So I got off of work in California a Friday
Speaker 3: and drove straight to Vegas about four hours. Wasn't too bad.
Speaker 3: Managed to miss traffic, which was really nice. Got to
Speaker 3: Vegas and Lily had her dance competition. Her and the
Speaker 3: girls that she dances with had their first dance competition
Speaker 3: in Las Vegas. It was phenomenal. The girls did an
Speaker 3: amazing job. I'd like to give them a big shout out.
Speaker 3: Not that they're listening to this, because they're not supposed
Speaker 3: to be or wouldn't be to listen to this. It
Speaker 3: is not safe for kids anyway, but they did. They
Speaker 3: did a great job. They they all danced their hearts out,
Speaker 3: some of them for the first time. It was their
Speaker 3: first competition and there were a couple thousand people at
Speaker 3: this thing, so it was it was nerve wracking for sure.
Speaker 3: Couldn't imagine being on the stage doing what they did,
Speaker 3: so kudos to him. Her and two of the other
Speaker 3: girls got best overall in one of their dances they
Speaker 3: did in trio, and then she meddled in a bunch
Speaker 3: of other ones that she did so but that was
Speaker 3: the one first place that she got. But it was
Speaker 3: really cool, so very proud, had a really good time.
Speaker 3: Pissed off a couple people. We went out to dinner.
Speaker 3: She wanted to go to Texas Roadhouse and I had
Speaker 3: sent you the text messages. There was this guy sitting
Speaker 3: outside and I was like, Hey, excuse me, sir, but
Speaker 3: you have some puke on your shirt. And he was
Speaker 3: wearing an Ohio State Buckeye shirt and.
Speaker 4: He did that.
Speaker 3: Guy did not fucking like me, man, he did not
Speaker 3: enjoy that joke. I thought it was fucking hilarious. And then, uh,
Speaker 3: kudos to the guy were in the Dallas Cowboys shirt.
Speaker 3: Who I slammed the door in his face when he
Speaker 3: was trying to walk through. I had it open. I
Speaker 3: was holding the door open for a bunch of people,
Speaker 3: and as this guy was walking through, I just closed
Speaker 3: the fucking door right on his face. He stopped and
Speaker 3: we had a good chuckle about that because he knew
Speaker 3: what it was about. You know, he wasn't stupid. He
Speaker 3: knew it because he was a Dallas Cowboys fan. Yeah
Speaker 3: he's gay. He's wearing fucking Dallas Cowboys shirts and yeah,
Speaker 3: so this is good. I realized very quickly that I
Speaker 3: hate being around cigarette smoke. We stayed at the Santa
Speaker 3: Fe Station hotel and casino and that place way out there, miserable,
Speaker 3: that place still standing did barely dude, you have the
Speaker 3: very first.
Speaker 4: Time I ever had Panda Express was at that hotel
Speaker 4: before it before it popped off.
Speaker 3: It's probably the same one. Yeah, it might be probably
Speaker 3: the same fucking one. It was terrible, dude. He was miserable. Yeah,
Speaker 3: that place, it's I.
Speaker 4: Can't believe that place is still open.
Speaker 3: Pretty sure that they never painted it. That the color
Speaker 3: of the wall has just changed from the smoke over
Speaker 3: the years. Yeah, it's so gross, dude, It's so fucking gross.
Speaker 3: The auditory, the auditorium, Auturnum, the auditorum, channel your inn, Nelly.
Speaker 3: I did auditorium, the ballrooms that they had the actual
Speaker 3: show in where they were act They were really nice.
Speaker 3: They were newer. You could tell they were kind of newer,
Speaker 3: at least redone, so they were good. The stages were
Speaker 3: pretty cool. But yeah, that was for the most part.
Speaker 3: And then I came back and hit the shipload of
Speaker 3: traffic coming back into California. So here I am. Here,
Speaker 3: you are ready to go to fucking bed.
Speaker 4: Nice.
Speaker 3: It feels like it's midnight to me, you know, I
Speaker 3: every bone in my body hurts. I had to give
Speaker 3: up my seat multiple times. They gave up my seat
Speaker 3: once for a woman who had all her mother had
Speaker 3: Alzheimer's and there was no seats in the place. So
Speaker 3: I had, you know, done my thing, and I'm just waiting.
Speaker 4: And she just pointed and said, your seat was over there, man.
Speaker 3: And this woman was looking for a seat with her mom,
Speaker 3: and I just promptly got up and gave it to her.
Speaker 3: So I spent, you know, the first half of the
Speaker 3: day kneeling on the ground behind people because I was
Speaker 3: trying to be polite to those that were behind me
Speaker 3: who couldn't see it. Oh, I thought you were as Yeah, no,
Speaker 3: I seeing the Grandma's asked. So she didn't know. She
Speaker 3: didn't know anything. It was like a surprise every ten minutes.
Speaker 5: Yeah, you know, got a tongue punch, you know, the
Speaker 5: part box every now and then it's okay, that brown starfish.
Speaker 3: Thank god she didn't have Alzheimer's to the point where
Speaker 3: she forgot to wipe. All right, it sounds like patter sugar,
Speaker 3: do you.
Speaker 4: It looks like a glazed chocolate donuts. They got left
Speaker 4: into the kmart thing too or the circle k thing
Speaker 4: too long. That's good shit, what about you Stone?
Speaker 5: The last forty eight hours for me have been pretty
Speaker 5: like hectic. I don't know like how I had time
Speaker 5: for all of it, to be honest, Like, I'm still
Speaker 5: trying to figure that out. The logistics on it.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's wild, isn't it.
Speaker 5: Yeah, Like, you know, my kids started coming down with
Speaker 5: something on Friday, and I still don't know if it's
Speaker 5: I'm pretty sure it's like a combo of like allergies
Speaker 5: and maybe a little bit of RSV. I thought it
Speaker 5: was just allergies, but then I texted her teacher and
Speaker 5: I was like, hey, he's not coming into it, and
Speaker 5: she's like, no worries half the classes out And I
Speaker 5: was like, oh, all right, damn.
Speaker 4: It's funny how they say that after you call.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 4: I said the same thing with my daughter like a
Speaker 4: couple of weeks ago, and it was like, you couldn't
Speaker 4: give us the heads.
Speaker 5: Up before that, y'all couldn't just send like a group text.
Speaker 5: We're all in the same like text chat, like just
Speaker 5: a heads up, hey, you know, being the lookout for
Speaker 5: your kid not feeling well. But yeah, I was dealing
Speaker 5: with her and she was barking and sneezing and wasn't
Speaker 5: feeling good and trying to clean up, trying to get
Speaker 5: homework done, you know, like all on Friday night, also
Speaker 5: trying to prepped leave on Saturday, and like I fell
Speaker 5: bad because I was like, hey, you know, dad, can
Speaker 5: you go ahead and take care of my kegs. I
Speaker 5: got to go to town for something. He was like yeah, sure,
Speaker 5: and so like I dropped her out and I was like, yeah,
Speaker 5: I think he's just allergy. He's like, should be all right,
Speaker 5: and like left.
Speaker 4: She looks like petal ince.
Speaker 3: She did look so run down. She was like hey,
Speaker 3: b b boes it go And.
Speaker 5: I felt so bad, but I was like, you know,
Speaker 5: like I gotta go, and like I left and got
Speaker 5: to the airport. I had about an hour and a
Speaker 5: half until we boarded, and I wrote a five page
Speaker 5: paper in that time waiting at the airport, really for college.
Speaker 5: And then I got on the plane, went there, spent
Speaker 5: almost an hour in traffic just getting from Lax to
Speaker 5: U c LA so I could go see my girlfriend
Speaker 5: s had surgery there. I spent the night with her,
Speaker 5: and it was just every two hours, like someone came
Speaker 5: in and was like, hey, like, I'm just gonna go
Speaker 5: ahead just something. I'm like, yeah, can you can you
Speaker 5: this is a hospital, like you're supposed to let people
Speaker 5: like hel up and I can't really do that if
Speaker 5: they can't sleep because you're in here fucking around with shit.
Speaker 5: You don't need to fuck around with you know what
Speaker 5: I mean, like didn't makes sense. But I think I
Speaker 5: got probably a total of four hours of sleep.
Speaker 3: This it's pissed off because the nurses and fucking assistants
Speaker 3: are coming in to do their job to save his
Speaker 3: girlfriend's life, and he's just like, bitch, they're not even
Speaker 3: doing their job. She doesn't need ship.
Speaker 1: She didn't need shit.
Speaker 5: She even yelled at them at one point, was like
Speaker 5: what do you guys need? And I was like looked
Speaker 5: over and she was like yeah, like I'm good, I
Speaker 5: don't need anything. And she They're just like yeah, okay,
Speaker 5: and she left and just right back to sleep, and
Speaker 5: I was like, okay, right back to sleep. It was crazy.
Speaker 5: And then they came in at like four point thirty
Speaker 5: and they were like, yeah, we need to like check
Speaker 5: your blood we need to check the blood pressure and everything,
Speaker 5: and and like they needed like she needed to up
Speaker 5: and like go take a piss, and like I had
Speaker 5: to get up out of the chair and move. And
Speaker 5: when she went back and I laid back down, my
Speaker 5: eyes were just like sclued open and I was like,
Speaker 5: it is five thirty in the morning, and I think
Speaker 5: I went to bed at like twelve shit, and so
Speaker 5: I just sat there and was like, all right, I
Speaker 5: just we're just going to read about stocks and bonds.
Speaker 5: And so I read thirty pages right there, and then
Speaker 5: when breakfast open and went and got breakfast and sat
Speaker 5: down with her for a little bit, and then it
Speaker 5: was time for me to go back to l EX
Speaker 5: and I went back to l EX and I got
Speaker 5: to tell you, it was like just in the nick
Speaker 5: of time. Like I got in there right, and I
Speaker 5: always get there early because you never know, and like legit,
Speaker 5: I get there and I had about two hours before
Speaker 5: we boarded, and took about twenty minutes for me to
Speaker 5: get through the line. But as I got through the front,
Speaker 5: there was this massive group of people that walked in
Speaker 5: and I heard the lady say, hey, just let everyone
Speaker 5: know who's asking about TSA in the bag check lines.
Speaker 5: That it just went from twenty minutes to an hour
Speaker 5: and a half, and I was like damn. And it
Speaker 5: literally was like two minutes of people coming in just
Speaker 5: two minutes, like it got that busy. And I was like, well,
Speaker 5: you can you know PSA for anyone out there who
Speaker 5: thinks that they don't have to get there early. Please
Speaker 5: get there early. Just make sure you don't miss your flight,
Speaker 5: because that shit happens. That shit happens.
Speaker 3: So I seek your mom who's willing to fucking get
Speaker 3: in a wheelchair.
Speaker 5: Yeah that too, that too, But like I had, I
Speaker 5: had a bunch of extra times. So I just sat
Speaker 5: there and read a whole lot more, and I got
Speaker 5: a whole lot more done for some side glasses. And
Speaker 5: then I tried to sleep on the plane.
Speaker 3: But I don't know.
Speaker 5: I'm over for three right now. With the last airplanes,
Speaker 5: some kid has been fucking screaming every single time. And
Speaker 5: I was like, I was like almost in tears. I
Speaker 5: was like I could have got like a thirty minute nap.
Speaker 5: I still got so much more shit to do. I
Speaker 5: gotta do a test when I get home. I gotta
Speaker 5: write another paper. I gotta take care of a sick kid.
Speaker 5: I gotta do a podcast.
Speaker 3: I've running on this like four.
Speaker 5: I was asleep, baby, somebody help me, somebody help me.
Speaker 4: Stone just burst into the Cockpaity, like, hey, can I
Speaker 4: get it in here and just take a fucking nap.
Speaker 5: If somebody isn't killing fucking chat, this thing is going down.
Speaker 3: In America right now that's like praying for the plane
Speaker 3: to crash.
Speaker 4: Take her down, Just take her down.
Speaker 5: There, inner run White.
Speaker 3: Everybody else is definitely afraid of getting on airplanes. AJ
Speaker 3: is just fucking plane hopping from one to the next,
Speaker 3: Like just like plane bingo.
Speaker 4: Which one of these has the female pilots. That's gonna
Speaker 4: crash this that's what I want.
Speaker 5: But yeah, it's and and now we're here, and I
Speaker 5: don't know, the grace of God, I'm here. Like I
Speaker 5: even set an alarm too. I was like, I can't
Speaker 5: sleep through the podcast, Like I almost passed out on
Speaker 5: the couch, but I didn't. Somehow, you look tired. I
Speaker 5: don't know.
Speaker 4: You don't look tired too.
Speaker 5: It's been it's been a weekend, jents, it's been a weekend.
Speaker 5: It's good.
Speaker 4: I'm glad. Everything's doing good and everything's moving in the
Speaker 4: right direction.
Speaker 5: Yea, it is. She's good. Everything's good, moving in the
Speaker 5: right direction, and everything is looking great good.
Speaker 4: I like it.
Speaker 6: I like it.
Speaker 4: Little note that we talked about, I think last week's
Speaker 4: podcast just a quick update for those people that might
Speaker 4: have watched the hockey. That was way fucking cool. And yeah,
Speaker 4: Canada won, Like like I said, it was a much
Speaker 4: better game than I anticipated. I did see though, nine
Speaker 4: point three million people viewers. I bet there was more people,
Speaker 4: but nine point three million viewers watched that game, which
Speaker 4: was literally a meaningless fucking game.
Speaker 5: Right.
Speaker 4: They this is their new, the new All Star break thing.
Speaker 4: There is a trophy, YadA, YadA, YadA. And I'm not
Speaker 4: saying meaningless because we're Americans and we lost it. Just
Speaker 4: literally like this this is a brand new thing. It's
Speaker 4: not like the Stanley Cup. It's not like the Olympics. Right,
Speaker 4: they didn't win.
Speaker 3: None of the players want any money for it. They
Speaker 3: didn't great, they didn't get any kind of bonus or incentive.
Speaker 3: There was no there there was no standing change from it,
Speaker 3: like no team or no country won any kind of
Speaker 3: standing about it. There was a trophy, well there was
Speaker 3: a yeah, but there was a trophy. But like what
Speaker 3: I mean is is like there's no records to be
Speaker 3: set yet correct. And then also how many.
Speaker 5: Other countries competed in it? It was just four, just
Speaker 5: four total, And they're trying to build it up like
Speaker 5: a World Cup kind of a thing.
Speaker 4: Yeah they might, they might.
Speaker 5: I'm game with that.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's that's where I was getting at nine point
Speaker 4: three million viewers. It is the largest watched hockey game
Speaker 4: in over thirty years. You're talking about Stanley Cups that
Speaker 4: have gone to Game sevens in those time frames, right,
Speaker 4: the most watched hockey game in thirty fucking years. That's
Speaker 4: how fucking good that game was. That's how much hype
Speaker 4: was behind that game. And so I love to see it.
Speaker 4: I love to see it for the sport. And fuck
Speaker 4: you Canada, Mike, if you're listening, I love you, but
Speaker 4: go fuck yourself, you Frenchy. Fuck yeah, so let's move on.
Speaker 4: Fucking fucks hate Canada. I fucking hate it.
Speaker 3: The only thing Canada is good for is free healthcare
Speaker 3: and maple syrup.
Speaker 4: Anything else, even then, I'm good with the fake great
Speaker 4: value surrup. I don't need I don't need anything special.
Speaker 3: I just always assumed that all maple trees came from Canada.
Speaker 4: Like all Mexicans came from Mexico. Yeah right, okay, that
Speaker 4: makes sense.
Speaker 3: I'll give it to him. I give it to him. Look,
Speaker 3: I'm an equal opportunity human or whatever that bullshit's called.
Speaker 4: Your DEI is that what you're saying?
Speaker 5: We might have to thank for what for plaid.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, true, maybe shout out to the plaid moose.
Speaker 3: I thought the plaid. I thought the plaid would come
Speaker 3: from overseas somewhere.
Speaker 5: It probably did, like we probably did. Like I was
Speaker 5: thinking about that hockey matchup, and I was like, damn,
Speaker 5: talk about a throwback.
Speaker 4: True.
Speaker 3: Imagine speaking of hockey matchup and moose, could you imagine
Speaker 3: a full hockey team of humans versus a full hockey
Speaker 3: team of moose?
Speaker 4: I guess depends on who the humans are.
Speaker 3: To watch that Canadians and the MEAs is it MEAs moose.
Speaker 4: We're called we're we're we're rename it. We're taking taking
Speaker 4: that over MEAs uh. The gaggle fuck of moose is
Speaker 4: called MEAs Yeah.
Speaker 1: Could you imagine?
Speaker 3: Could you imagine like nine fucking giant ass moose meat
Speaker 3: on the ice just plowing through fucking Canadians, dude left
Speaker 3: and right. That'd be phenomenal.
Speaker 5: It's a regular afternoon in the Yukon, It's.
Speaker 4: Right, it's just my trick down to Ottawa.
Speaker 3: Either. But we're gonna go down to the rink and
Speaker 3: get toppled by some moose.
Speaker 4: You want to come join us, fucking a But I'm in.
Speaker 3: They have to have it somewhere because like overseas like
Speaker 3: Russia and fucking the Check Republic and Germany they have
Speaker 3: all these crazy ass things on late night TV of
Speaker 3: like how long can one guy stand in a doorway?
Speaker 1: And uh they got.
Speaker 3: Like karate, they got karate, ice skating and ship you know,
Speaker 3: oh yeah car.
Speaker 5: J ship yeah, wild themselves and strangle themselves in a
Speaker 5: car wild ship wold ship.
Speaker 3: Just all I'm asking for is if there's anybody out
Speaker 3: there from the German or Russian fucking TV publicity. You know, hey, look, syndicate, syndicate,
Speaker 3: let's go put it up syndicated.
Speaker 4: I love you, uh well from from one what what?
Speaker 3: Go ahead?
Speaker 4: Tell me?
Speaker 6: No? Go ahead?
Speaker 4: No go ahead? No no, no, no, you go first.
Speaker 4: It's been a long time. Sounds cute.
Speaker 3: The only are adorable?
Speaker 5: Doc your tips. Now I'm trying.
Speaker 4: I can't dock any further.
Speaker 3: We would be fucked. We would be trying to dock
Speaker 3: each other because both of our bellies would get in
Speaker 3: the way, and then if we turned around try and
Speaker 3: dutch rudder, neither one of us are fucking limber enough
Speaker 3: to reach behind anymore.
Speaker 6: So it screwed.
Speaker 4: You have to reach behind for a Dutch rudder.
Speaker 3: Isn't that what you do? You reach behind?
Speaker 4: And I think that's just a reach around.
Speaker 1: No, that's because that.
Speaker 3: Would be me facing you though, so like I would be,
Speaker 3: my chest would be against your back. Google it, Google
Speaker 3: it while I do this commercial.
Speaker 4: All right, go ahead?
Speaker 3: Okay? Have you ever had a dog? Did they shit
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Speaker 3: q u I l L get yours. Now, supplies will
Speaker 3: not last forever, as they might not even be there.
Speaker 4: Now we have a website.
Speaker 3: It's our link tree.
Speaker 4: Oh, our link tree. Okay, like what.
Speaker 3: People can tell me these things? We stopped paid for
Speaker 3: that a long time ago.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I think Indias swiped it from us. And now
Speaker 5: it's a call center.
Speaker 4: Oh it's good stuff.
Speaker 5: You know, it's funny.
Speaker 3: You a bunch of cards extended Warran D.
Speaker 4: I was sitting here like waiting for you to tell
Speaker 4: a joke. You're like, I'm gonna do this commercial. I'm like,
Speaker 4: what fucking commercially.
Speaker 3: Whoops?
Speaker 4: All right? Well, from anyway, from one bracket to the next, Uh,
Speaker 4: I'm gonna do another bracket like Stone did. Although I
Speaker 4: did send you guys something, it was just gonna be
Speaker 4: basically Stargate sixteen times. That's not true. What I decided
Speaker 4: to do was I decided to do a dad's bracket.
Speaker 4: I chose movie dads, not TV dads. Movie dads to
Speaker 4: go up against one another, and we're gonna crown the
Speaker 4: best movie dad. I do think TV dads are better
Speaker 4: than movie dads. I think there's better TV dads out there,
Speaker 4: agreed than movie dad. But I got some good ones
Speaker 4: on it.
Speaker 5: Just spend more time with them. I agree.
Speaker 4: I think that's it. You get more connection. Yeah, so
Speaker 4: all right, well let's go. Let's go right into it.
Speaker 4: Match Up number one. This is in my app so
Speaker 4: it was randomized. I just randomized it. Would you like
Speaker 4: me to randomize it one more time? Or are we
Speaker 4: ready to go?
Speaker 5: You're good?
Speaker 4: Matchup number one Arthur Weasley from Harry Potter versus Clarkswald
Speaker 4: from National Lampoons. Griswold.
Speaker 5: Yeah, like he may be like sort of a fuck up,
Speaker 5: but at least he's not like a cunt. Okay, dads, Wait,
Speaker 5: hold on, hold on, I think it was the wrong guy. Wait,
Speaker 5: who'd you say for Mary Pottery? I was like, what
Speaker 5: my bad?
Speaker 3: Okay, Dad's advocate, Dad's advocate. Dad Weasley was actually a
Speaker 3: phenomenal dad. Okay, but he was a great dad and
Speaker 3: he took care of those kids, and there's a lot
Speaker 3: to be said about him. He's a very underrated dad.
Speaker 3: So this is a little closer than you think, if
Speaker 3: you if you really dig into it. But I want
Speaker 3: to go with my immediate gut instinct, which is Griswold,
Speaker 3: just because he's that fucking like fun, electrocute yourself.
Speaker 6: Dad.
Speaker 5: He's a lightning bulb.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you never know what you're gonna get. There's so
Speaker 3: many lessons that you can learn, but he's gonna learn
Speaker 3: him first.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you watch him.
Speaker 5: Yeah, so yeah, yeah, he's the lightning bolt in her
Speaker 5: dad's and de Quel logo. That's Clark. You know, he's
Speaker 5: our lightning bolt.
Speaker 4: All right, So that one's that one. Moves on, Clark Griswald,
Speaker 4: all right. Next matchup, we have Harry Stamper from Armageddon
Speaker 4: versus Jack Jack. I think this spell checked me and
Speaker 4: I didn't realize that Jack Bryce, but it's I don't
Speaker 4: think that's the right last name. I gotta look it up,
Speaker 4: but it's from Meet the Parents. Robert de Niro, uh,
Speaker 4: and Harry Stamper is Bruce Willis and Armageddon. Whoever's got
Speaker 4: the pen flick, I'm gonna kill you. I can't.
Speaker 5: Sorry, I'm bad. That's me noise, like I.
Speaker 3: Just throws it. I'm gonna go with Bruce Willis because
Speaker 3: he saved the world. Okay, and yeah, he he's kind
Speaker 3: of like he's I think, okay, Meet the Parents. Robert
Speaker 3: de Niro was a twat in that movie. Yea, an
Speaker 3: absolute twat and I so I got Jack Burns was
Speaker 3: his name, and so I gotta go. I gotta go
Speaker 3: with Bruce Willis. It's that simple, okay, Stone, I gotta
Speaker 3: go with Bruce too.
Speaker 5: That scene at the end when he's talking with his
Speaker 5: daughter live and he's like, hey, I'm not gonna make
Speaker 5: it home. That like broke me every time I watched it.
Speaker 5: But now as a father to a little girl, that
Speaker 5: movie hits even deeper and I almost can't And that
Speaker 5: was one of my favorite movies. I love that movie.
Speaker 5: I almost can't watch it anymore because now I am
Speaker 5: a dad to a girl and I'm like, dude, like
Speaker 5: I sobs fucking city when that that comes on, you know,
Speaker 5: and uh and as well, he fucking shot her boyfriend
Speaker 5: with a fucking shot, you know, like he had lived
Speaker 5: out the dead fantasy right there. He went out as
Speaker 5: a fucking hero while also skating by with attempted manslaughter.
Speaker 4: There you go, that's true.
Speaker 5: Yeah, you know, say yeah, Harry Stamper.
Speaker 4: All right, Harry Stamper moves on. Next up is the
Speaker 4: Animated versus the Animated. It's funny how that worked out.
Speaker 4: Mufassa from the Lion King versus Marlin from Finding Nemo.
Speaker 3: Ah, Mufasa fucking abandoned his kid right off the bat
Speaker 3: in the movie, so fucking.
Speaker 5: Fucking idiot, Marlin, Marlin all day. Marlin went to get
Speaker 5: his son, like he's kind of the ultimate dad, you know,
Speaker 5: like like arguably, you know, from what we've heard so far,
Speaker 5: I don't know what's left. I think definitely a championship
Speaker 5: round would be Marlin versus Harry. That's that's a hard
Speaker 5: that's a hard thing right there. You know, you got
Speaker 5: one who sacrificed himself to save his daughter, another one
Speaker 5: who tracks down over across the entire ocean to find
Speaker 5: his son. That's a hard matchup right there. Yeah, Marlin
Speaker 5: all day, Marlin.
Speaker 4: All day, all right. Okay, next up grew from Despicable
Speaker 4: Me and uh, Chris Gardner from Pursuit of Happiness.
Speaker 3: I do not remember, Oh Chris Gardner is Will Smith.
Speaker 4: Will Smith because I threw the grow one in here,
Speaker 4: because because he adopts the girls for the reasons not
Speaker 4: to be a father, but then becomes the father figure
Speaker 4: and and I actually like that part of the story
Speaker 4: from a simple kids animated movie.
Speaker 3: Okay, now do we know everything we know from all
Speaker 3: of the Grow movies, from all of the Despicable Me movies,
Speaker 3: or is are we basing this off of just like
Speaker 3: a specific time.
Speaker 4: Let's just just just off of Despicable Me the first movie.
Speaker 3: Okay, Okay, I'm gonna go Chris Gardner. Okay, I I
Speaker 3: think he he's too real, grew, Grew had nefarious and
Speaker 3: uh uh intentions mm hmm yeah yeah, okay Stone, Yeah,
Speaker 3: who's the second.
Speaker 4: Guy, Chris Gardner? Will Smith. Pursuit of happiness.
Speaker 5: Pursuit happens. That's right, that's right, that's right, Yeah, pursuit
Speaker 5: of happiness.
Speaker 4: All right?
Speaker 3: Uh, moving on.
Speaker 4: Brian Mills from Taking would be Liam Neeson and Charlie
Speaker 4: Hinton from Daddy Daycare, That would be Eddie Murphy.
Speaker 5: Oh, Liam Neeson, like one hundred percent taken. That's a
Speaker 5: that's another one right there, like going to get tracking
Speaker 5: down your kid, you know, like.
Speaker 4: Damn, damn, go ahead them.
Speaker 3: It's Ddy Murphy, bro like dude, all the ship that
Speaker 3: he went through in that movie. He just didn't want
Speaker 3: to pay daycare v Yeah, but that's a dad, Like
Speaker 3: that's that's a real dad.
Speaker 1: Liam Neeson is not a real dad. That was bullshit
Speaker 1: in that fucking taken movie.
Speaker 3: That was bullshit.
Speaker 5: It's a real dad because he got a cheap trick
Speaker 5: to play a concerto.
Speaker 7: Yeah, wait so but that's realistic though, Like, it's not realistic.
Speaker 5: If the kids shit all over the bathroom, I don't
Speaker 5: care if it's not my kid. Kid's going through a window, goodbye, bam,
Speaker 5: he's over there, Like, oh, I'm gonna go find someone
Speaker 5: who speaks klingon to speak with this kid and try
Speaker 5: to ask him if the shit all over the bathroom, No, nah, man,
Speaker 5: come get your kid. I don't care. Call out his
Speaker 5: call out to work sick. He's he's gonna stand outside
Speaker 5: until you come out.
Speaker 3: I mean, let's be honest, right, what was more? What
Speaker 3: was more difficult? Having the patience that he had or
Speaker 3: going through the sh it that Liam Neeson went through?
Speaker 5: Liam Neeson.
Speaker 1: I mean, but yeah, all he had to do was
Speaker 1: risk his life.
Speaker 3: He was just like Eddie Murphy had to stay calm
Speaker 3: and not kill a fuck load of kids.
Speaker 5: Like but like that's that's the point that doesn't make
Speaker 5: him like a real dad, because if he was a
Speaker 5: real dad, he would have been on the run for murder,
Speaker 5: for murdering those little kids. He's not a real dad.
Speaker 4: I actually really like your take on this one, thom
Speaker 4: and Uh. But because he he is a he is
Speaker 4: a good dad because he says, fuck the man, this
Speaker 4: this school is too much. It's ridiculous. So me and
Speaker 4: my buddy are going to create our own thing and
Speaker 4: then we're gonna save other kids from this ridiculous school.
Speaker 4: But I do have to give it to Liam Neeson
Speaker 4: in this one. I think I think he's I think
Speaker 4: he's got the win. Uh, But I like the theory
Speaker 4: behind the the Charlie Hinton, next up, Howard Langston that's
Speaker 4: Arnold from Jingle All the Way. And Gomez Adams from
Speaker 4: the Adams Family as.
Speaker 5: Oh, Gomez Adams. I mean, like I I to give
Speaker 5: merit to to Arnold's character, like he did, you know,
Speaker 5: really go out of his way to find.
Speaker 3: A doll for his kid that should have gotten.
Speaker 5: But he should have upon it. And he's just not
Speaker 5: that good of a dad because he can't manage that well.
Speaker 5: Piece of like hol me buy your ship earlier in
Speaker 5: the year. That's what I fucking do. I start fucking
Speaker 5: buying for Christmas in March.
Speaker 3: Yeah, come on, that's that okay jingle all the way
Speaker 3: is the epitome speaking of Dad's Advocate, That is the
Speaker 3: epitome of a movie one of us could use for
Speaker 3: a Dad's Advocate episode we did where he is a
Speaker 3: terrible fucking human. We didn't.
Speaker 4: He is not the us mm hm, the.
Speaker 3: Dude fucking ruined like stores and a man's life anyway, No.
Speaker 4: Him more all right. Uh, these next two matchups may
Speaker 4: be the hardest matchups in the first round. I don't know,
Speaker 4: but this one I feel maybe the hardest for me personally. Uh.
Speaker 4: Cameron Poe, Nick Cage conn Air and Daniel Hillard Robin Williams.
Speaker 4: Miss doubt Fire.
Speaker 5: Wow, oh missus doubtfire Wow yeah wow man wow Yeah.
Speaker 3: That was quick.
Speaker 6: Wow.
Speaker 5: Yeah. I Mean, if you think about Nick Cage's character
Speaker 5: is just going point A to point B. It's kind
Speaker 5: of a simple linear path with some explosions and gunfire.
Speaker 5: But when you go to you have to assume like
Speaker 5: a whole like trans identity just to see your kids,
Speaker 5: like who whole espionage thing like.
Speaker 3: You just right there is way more than yourself.
Speaker 5: Gunfire and put the bunny back in the bucks.
Speaker 1: You It's.
Speaker 4: What you got dumb.
Speaker 5: Fuck you up, dude, Yeah, come get it. You know
Speaker 5: where I live.
Speaker 1: Nick Cage is Liam Neeson but way cooler.
Speaker 2: Same fucking thing, same fucking thing, but in the air.
Speaker 2: Rob Williams, you went with Miss Stumpfire too.
Speaker 1: Oh my god. Yeah, listen, he fucking lied. He lied
Speaker 1: the whole movie.
Speaker 3: Dude.
Speaker 1: He had to wear an entire fucking skin shoe.
Speaker 4: This would also be a great dad's advocate. Yeah, agreed,
Speaker 4: he's a piece of shit. Cameron pos Way better all right?
Speaker 5: Next match, arguably better dad than she was a mom
Speaker 5: to those kids. I said what I said, Yeah, I agree. Agree.
Speaker 4: Last matchup John Archibald, Denzel Washington and John Q or
Speaker 4: mister Levenstein Eugene Levy from American Pie.
Speaker 5: Oh man, I gotta go John Q.
Speaker 3: I don't remember it.
Speaker 5: You remember John Q, John Q when he held up
Speaker 5: the hospital to get a heart transplant for his son
Speaker 5: who's dying.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, great fucking movie. That's like a top three Denzel.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I gotta with my peeps though. Man, it's Levy,
Speaker 3: you really going that.
Speaker 4: We'll just tell your mother that we hit it all,
Speaker 4: you know, so, Eugene Levy, I'm sure Stone could probably
Speaker 4: relate to. This statement reminds me a lot of my
Speaker 4: grandpa and Stone's grandpa, very very similar style talking points, way.
Speaker 5: Laid back way. You could never see them raise their voice.
Speaker 4: Yep, yep. But in this case, I hate the matchup
Speaker 4: that he drew because John Archibald, Denzel Washington, John Q
Speaker 4: does does take this one. So yeah, I mean the
Speaker 4: dude potato potato right.
Speaker 5: See, Okay, here's here's what I wish we could have had.
Speaker 5: I believe it was taken and it was Daddy day
Speaker 5: here that when against each other, right, I.
Speaker 4: Thought, if you were gonna say taken versus Connye, I'm
Speaker 4: gonna fucking kill you.
Speaker 5: It's not going to be conn Air at the end
Speaker 5: of the day. It's just not.
Speaker 4: I guess I just hold a special place in my heart.
Speaker 5: But no, like that matchup that that was Daddy Daycare
Speaker 5: and taken, right, yeah it was, yes, it was yes.
Speaker 5: So I wish it could have been switched where it
Speaker 5: was Daddy day Care versus Taken, uh no, versus Levenstein. Yeah,
Speaker 5: and then it was the other way because those those
Speaker 5: both would have been more perpect matches.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's nice thing about the randomizer. Yeah, round to day.
Speaker 3: I think we're gonna be in the same boat though,
Speaker 3: So let's see where we go.
Speaker 4: It's round two, you and the boat. It's this episode
Speaker 4: Clark Griswold versus Harry Stamper. So you have Clark Griswold
Speaker 4: National Lampoons and Harry Stamper Armageddon stoned Harry Stamper.
Speaker 3: Same. Wow, it's close though, all right, it's it's close fictional.
Speaker 4: Next matchup you have, Yeah, Armageddon is not real, way
Speaker 4: more realistic. Person is way more realistic. Person, way more realistic.
Speaker 3: Maybe I I definitely when it came to that matchup,
Speaker 3: I ignored the same logic that I applied to Daddy Care.
Speaker 4: So fucking asshole.
Speaker 5: All right.
Speaker 4: Next matchup, Marlon from Finding Nemo versus Chris Gardner from
Speaker 4: Pursuit of Happiness.
Speaker 3: Dome Finding Nemo Marlin Stone Cross the Ocean.
Speaker 4: Man, I'm so happy that Marlon and Harry Stamper meeting
Speaker 4: in the next round. Get one of these.
Speaker 5: That's a fucking hard pick right there.
Speaker 4: Next up, Brian Mills Taken and Gomez Adams from Adams Family.
Speaker 3: Adams said what I said, Man, I love it.
Speaker 4: I'm all for pitching dad.
Speaker 3: Dude. He let the kids you know, live their lives
Speaker 3: and be who they wanted to be and more, Titia, I.
Speaker 5: Mean what, I am also gonna go with Gomez because
Speaker 5: because of this reasoning Liam had help, I believe Gomez
Speaker 5: would do as much for his kids. I's not more
Speaker 5: with less help because he's not a popular person.
Speaker 3: He wouldn't need anybody else, nah, period, he would just need.
Speaker 5: Like Uncle Fester and a couple of their family members.
Speaker 5: Because of it, I good to go Gomez could do.
Speaker 5: So I'm gonna say Gomez because he's as capable with
Speaker 5: less help.
Speaker 4: All right, last matchup of the second round, we have
Speaker 4: Daniel Hillard Missus Doubtfire versus John Archibald John Q.
Speaker 3: I don't know, man, that's a tough one. The dude
Speaker 3: that held a shitload of people hostage to basically strong
Speaker 3: arm people into saving his son over other people, essentially
Speaker 3: committing a ton of crimes, neglecting kid laws rules and
Speaker 3: I don't know, just a general common courtesy to mankind
Speaker 3: or a guy that just dressed up like an old
Speaker 3: lady to see his kids and did what he needed
Speaker 3: to do. Man was a pervert somewhat within the law.
Speaker 5: One has a prison sentence. One has a shame sentence,
Speaker 5: but also.
Speaker 3: Kind of not a shame sentence really.
Speaker 5: Because you're just trying to see his kids. Yeah, I
Speaker 5: think it's gonna be John Q.
Speaker 4: Is that who you went with them?
Speaker 3: Doubt fire? Oh?
Speaker 5: Okay, split the ties.
Speaker 4: I gotta go John Q. H the sacrifice to do
Speaker 4: what you have to do to save your kid's life. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 4: I go, I go John John?
Speaker 3: All right?
Speaker 4: Round three, semi Finals. Harry Stamper. First matchup, Armageddon and
Speaker 4: Marlin from Finding Nemo Dome. Let's go with you first.
Speaker 3: Uh So you got a guy who saved the world
Speaker 3: or you got a fish who found his son. That's
Speaker 3: a tough one. Can I pick Bruce the Shark from
Speaker 3: Finding Nemo?
Speaker 5: No?
Speaker 3: Okay?
Speaker 4: Uh Harry, Harry Stamper, Okay, Stoned, I'm also gonna go Harry.
Speaker 4: Of course.
Speaker 5: Man, he sacrificed himself to save his little girl.
Speaker 3: It's true he did a lot. He did a lot
Speaker 3: more throughout that movie.
Speaker 5: He did do a lot more, taught her.
Speaker 3: Some life lessons, made sure that the guy was a
Speaker 3: good guy.
Speaker 4: There's some hidden dad things in there, all right, Okay,
Speaker 4: last matchup, Gomez Adams, John Archibald Gomez. Wow, that was fast, Stone,
Speaker 4: because what did you say?
Speaker 3: I say Gomez, because if given the opportunity, Gomez would
Speaker 3: do the same thing. But Gomez more than likely already
Speaker 3: has a heart ready on ice waiting. So I'm just saying, yeah,
Speaker 3: that's a good point.
Speaker 5: He's a might swing my answer because I wasn't gona
Speaker 5: say Johnny, but I think I'm more likely go to
Speaker 5: say Gomez.
Speaker 4: But not to sway your point Backstoned. If if he's
Speaker 4: already got a heart on on ready, that doesn't make
Speaker 4: him as good of a dad as John Q, who's
Speaker 4: willing to sacrifice everything just to save his kids life.
Speaker 3: Gomez would too, would but you don't know, he just
Speaker 3: never happened.
Speaker 5: I think Gomez what position. I think Gomez would go,
Speaker 5: like get someone's heart just Marlin.
Speaker 3: True Marlin would have.
Speaker 4: So what are you going?
Speaker 5: Stone?
Speaker 4: You're going John? John Archibald, are you going to Gomez Adams?
Speaker 5: Gomez?
Speaker 3: Wow?
Speaker 4: All right, this is not the final I saw coming
Speaker 4: in this whole bracket. You got Harry Stamper from Armageddon
Speaker 4: and you have Gomez Adams from the Adams family in
Speaker 4: the final matchup for the dad's dad bracket. So who's
Speaker 4: the dad's dad of Harry Stamper and Gomez Adams Stone.
Speaker 4: Let's go with you first.
Speaker 5: It's gonna be Harry's Tamper.
Speaker 3: Okay, Al Bundy comes out of nowhere, fucking sucker punches
Speaker 3: TV show. It's a TV show, Adams.
Speaker 4: Wow, I gotta make this.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yep, you're gonna you fucked yourself here, Bud. We
Speaker 3: we did the roundabout on you. No, it's Gomez, man,
Speaker 3: It's listen. Gomez would ride that rocket. But the thing
Speaker 3: is is that again, I believe that Gomez would find
Speaker 3: a better way. Gomez is just a prepared individual. He's
Speaker 3: a prepared, planned dad. I think that that's what separates
Speaker 3: him from all these other guys. He would do all
Speaker 3: he would do all.
Speaker 1: The things that they did.
Speaker 5: But no, I give Gomez credit for finding a lot
Speaker 5: of things, but I don't find him credit for deflecting
Speaker 5: an asteroid without playing himself off. I think it might
Speaker 5: be outside of the realm of possibilities.
Speaker 3: And so Adam's family. I think, because we saw it happen,
Speaker 3: I have to go with Harry fair enough. I'm not
Speaker 3: I'm in your choice.
Speaker 4: I hate my answer because I hate the movie, but
Speaker 4: I'm gonna go Harry Stamper. Harry Stamper is the better
Speaker 4: dad in this matchup, and Harry Stamper is the champion
Speaker 4: of the dad's Dad bracket. And uh, I don't like it,
Speaker 4: but that's what we're here for, you know.
Speaker 3: Sprinkles.
Speaker 4: Sprinkles are for Harry Stamper and go Ma's Adams. All
Speaker 4: he gets is Mormentia, he might and you who knows
Speaker 4: what he's gonna get from Mortitia. But let's take a
Speaker 4: commercial break and see if that ties in. Right up, Bokers,
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Speaker 5: So I hope we can clip that because like Dome
Speaker 5: just hit his chair and his chair fell, and just
Speaker 5: the way that his head looks just look reminded me
Speaker 5: of like a penis and like it comes out and
Speaker 5: the girls on top and just crushes it. And that's
Speaker 5: that's exactly what came to mind. Yeah, shout out to
Speaker 5: shout out to crush shout out.
Speaker 4: All right, so we got we got time for one
Speaker 4: more segment. Uh I, I took this segment. So we
Speaker 4: did a lot of funny review stuff back in the
Speaker 4: day with Dads, like where we read funny reviews well
Speaker 4: Stone and I in our Endeavors. When Dads was on
Speaker 4: a hiatus, we were on another podcast where we did
Speaker 4: a review, but everybody did the same review of a product, right,
Speaker 4: So I came up with a different concept of Hey,
Speaker 4: let's all do let's do a review of something. Go
Speaker 4: find something, bring it on the show, eat it, drink it,
Speaker 4: do whatever you want, and then give an honest review
Speaker 4: and tell people if it is it Dad approved or
Speaker 4: is it Dad disapproved? So Stone, what did what did
Speaker 4: you bring to the table? Let's go with you first.
Speaker 5: So by kid had gotten these yogurt bars like a
Speaker 5: week ago and she's been really like king them, and
Speaker 5: I was like really curious because I haven't tried one,
Speaker 5: and I was like, you know, that would actually be
Speaker 5: like perfect to try it for this for the segment
Speaker 5: here it's a Cleo bar from Sam's Club and it's
Speaker 5: just this little like protein yogurt bar. And I'm hoping
Speaker 5: that I get some culture out of this. Your boy.
Speaker 4: Get some culture with Cleo.
Speaker 3: Cleo at a bar. Jesus, I'm going to tell you
Speaker 3: your future.
Speaker 5: No, it was a culture yogurt joke. No I got it.
Speaker 4: I got yeah, No, I got it.
Speaker 5: Culture good bacteria for your floor, because like good but
Speaker 5: for your floor, really.
Speaker 3: Good bacteria for your floor. The bacteria from your asshole
Speaker 3: is going to be on the floor when your brands.
Speaker 5: A little bit. So this one's vanilla. See how this
Speaker 5: one is?
Speaker 3: Okay, what does it look like? Let me see? The
Speaker 3: inside looks like a little ice cream bark?
Speaker 4: It does it does look like an ice cream bar.
Speaker 5: You know, I'm not a fan of yogurt, but I
Speaker 5: could eat this. It's not bad. It's not bad. Gotta
Speaker 5: give it to them. It's really light, it's not very like.
Speaker 5: It's not really dense. It looks dense, but it doesn't
Speaker 5: like bite dense, and it doesn't have that hard bite
Speaker 5: that yogurt does. So it's like my penis, except not
Speaker 5: a twizzler.
Speaker 3: It looks dense, but it doesn't bite.
Speaker 4: All right, don't you want to go next?
Speaker 3: Sure?
Speaker 6: Uh?
Speaker 3: So I'm here in Rancho Cucamonga, and I went to
Speaker 3: this Asian market because I like Asian things, and I
Speaker 3: found these these here.
Speaker 4: Back that up. It's usually a little better if you
Speaker 4: back it up closer to where your face is at.
Speaker 5: There you go, Can you read that?
Speaker 4: Yeah, it says.
Speaker 6: Yep. Uh.
Speaker 4: They are.
Speaker 3: They are natural reserve steaming sweet potatoes. And when you
Speaker 3: pull it out, it looks like it's one of those
Speaker 3: fucking that does not look good.
Speaker 4: Yeah, no, it's It looks like it's gonna smell like
Speaker 4: power bait.
Speaker 3: It looks like fish. It looks like fish, So we're
Speaker 3: gonna give it a shot.
Speaker 5: Here.
Speaker 3: It is sticky as fuck.
Speaker 4: Okay, you're muted stone.
Speaker 3: Goddamn. Oh wait, shud stone.
Speaker 5: It looks like power bait. For sure. It is not good.
Speaker 5: That is not the one, all right, man, I mean
Speaker 5: I'm gonna go. It does not taste I sweet with hair.
Speaker 5: What's the taste like power bait?
Speaker 3: It's just not there your left eye just and just
Speaker 3: like sh I brought thrown away that I was about
Speaker 3: to lick my fingers.
Speaker 4: That I brought two to the table. I brought a
Speaker 4: drink and a snack, and I'm gonna do the drink
Speaker 4: first because I think it's gonna be the worst of
Speaker 4: the two. So I have this Thaie Flavor bubble milk
Speaker 4: tea drink. I got it its safe way, So for
Speaker 4: those listening, if you have an Albertson's or a Vaughn's,
Speaker 4: that would be the same place. Or but this is
Speaker 4: just a Rico brand, so you could probably find this
Speaker 4: just about anywhere. Or they're like, but it is a
Speaker 4: bubble milk milk tea drink. I like how it says
Speaker 4: Thaie Flavor and then the bottom says Taiwan Classic, So
Speaker 4: I don't know, so it tastes like a tai tea.
Speaker 5: But it's not caffeinated. Okay, it's just like a milk.
Speaker 4: It smells a I don't know, it looks kind of
Speaker 4: looks orange.
Speaker 3: Did you have to shake it first or I guess
Speaker 3: it's not as this is a this is a.
Speaker 4: It's it shows little brown balls.
Speaker 3: But those are probably brown sugar would be my guess.
Speaker 4: Well, it's pretty good. I definitely taste the tea in it.
Speaker 4: It's got pretty good to that milk.
Speaker 6: I like it.
Speaker 3: It's not bad.
Speaker 5: I'm a sucker for ty Bobba.
Speaker 4: I don't think there is any balls unless they're all
Speaker 4: stuck at the bottom.
Speaker 5: Definitely, that's what she said.
Speaker 4: Next up, I also stayed in the Asian market with
Speaker 4: Wing Wong Ching Chong. I got this Taki taco yaki ball.
Speaker 3: Chips.
Speaker 4: It is a Japanese style barbecue sauce flavored corn puffs. Okay,
Speaker 4: saw these, I was like, I bet these are gonna
Speaker 4: slap and slap hard, so let me.
Speaker 3: Just explode this bag on.
Speaker 4: Jacks. My bag's gonna give out on me on this thing. Okay, first,
Speaker 4: unimpressed by the whiff, it was expecting more, but.
Speaker 6: Uh, there is.
Speaker 4: Crunch hitters instant. Yeah, yeah, brunch from here. It's it's
Speaker 4: almost like a corn pop met a little bit of
Speaker 4: ramen with some barbecue flavor.
Speaker 6: I like it.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, these are Dad approved on this one. Uh huh.
Speaker 3: I did so for dinner this afternoon, I did have
Speaker 3: deep fried deviled eggs. So they were Yeah, they were breaded.
Speaker 3: They took the egg itself and battered it, breaded it,
Speaker 3: deep fried it, and then they put the topping. They
Speaker 3: put the filling on top with a piece of bacon,
Speaker 3: some candied bacon. That was delicious.
Speaker 4: That sounds amazing.
Speaker 3: It was good mm hmm.
Speaker 6: But I didn't.
Speaker 3: I wasn't saving those for four hours until this.
Speaker 4: No, of course not. Was this something like local place
Speaker 4: or what? Yeah, okay, shout out to Rancho cucamonga local
Speaker 4: place for uh deviled eggs.
Speaker 3: Called lazy Dog. I had to look at the bag back, Oh,
Speaker 3: lazy dog called lazy Dog.
Speaker 5: I've been wanting to try Lazy Dog.
Speaker 3: I recommend it, highly recommended. I got the chicken pop pie,
Speaker 3: which was fucking massive. Dude. The chicken pop pie was
Speaker 3: the size of my head and I did not expect
Speaker 3: it to be. It looked like it looked chicken pop
Speaker 3: pie fans oh I love No, he hates chicken pop pie.
Speaker 5: Really absolutely love cultured swine especially you make it with
Speaker 5: you make it like cobbler style, but with Cheddarbay biscuits. Yep,
Speaker 5: from Red Lobster.
Speaker 4: That sounds good.
Speaker 3: I've done that.
Speaker 8: That's the move, right there, dude, I've done that. I've
Speaker 8: actually the kids love it. The kids absolutely love it.
Speaker 8: And what you can do with that is when you're
Speaker 8: done with it, you can take the inside. You can
Speaker 8: roll it into a ball and wrap it in saran
Speaker 8: wrap and then freeze them.
Speaker 3: A little pro dad tip right there.
Speaker 4: All right, well Stone, you want to give us a
Speaker 4: little commercial and then we'll come back and close this
Speaker 4: puppy out.
Speaker 5: Yeah, let's go baby.
Speaker 6: All right, Hey there, this is ripping butts here to
Speaker 6: sell you the new butt Mester three thousand. This smoker
Speaker 6: is made specifically for pork butts and is even shaped
Speaker 6: like a cute little butt. It only smokes pork butts,
Speaker 6: but if you try to smoke anything else, the secret
Speaker 6: butt agreed will come to smoke your butt. Slap that meat,
Speaker 6: smoke them cheeks.
Speaker 4: Baby.
Speaker 3: I love it.
Speaker 4: I should have got and that. I actually made a
Speaker 4: pork butt today for I decided not to send pictures
Speaker 4: because I knew you were both traveling and it was unfair.
Speaker 4: But my god, there was one piece I had. It
Speaker 4: was like the three quarters of it had the smoke ring.
Speaker 4: Three quarters of it.
Speaker 5: Okay, real quick.
Speaker 1: I made this.
Speaker 5: Johnny's Sex's Internet is out, was out got the herpes.
Speaker 5: So a couple of weeks ago, I made a pork butt.
Speaker 5: And this is something I hadn't tried before, where normally
Speaker 5: I would I would only put seasoning on the outside
Speaker 5: and then I would shred it up and everything's good.
Speaker 5: But I had seen this guy make pulled pork and
Speaker 5: when he shredded it up, he grabbed the bottle of
Speaker 5: seasoning he used and then he threw it in with
Speaker 5: the shredding, so everything got seasoned. And I was like,
Speaker 5: I want to try that. And I did it. Dude,
Speaker 5: I'm not doing it any other way from now on.
Speaker 5: That seasoning breaks through the entire thing. Oh my god,
Speaker 5: game changer. It was good.
Speaker 3: Changer.
Speaker 4: It's good.
Speaker 6: I like it.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I did.
Speaker 8: Uh.
Speaker 4: I did the mustard bind and I did the honey garlic,
Speaker 4: the same the same brand that does the math that.
Speaker 5: One can get a little too salt heavy.
Speaker 3: If he's too much, it can have You guys, tried
Speaker 3: brining your meat before you do it?
Speaker 4: No, chicken, it already takes too much time.
Speaker 3: I don't need to do that, chicken. I do, seriously,
Speaker 3: try try and brind it with like apple, with like
Speaker 3: apple juice. I'm good. It changes things.
Speaker 4: You can make it and I'll try it that way,
Speaker 4: but I'm not doing it, okay. But yeah, when I
Speaker 4: wrapped it, though, I threw on some honey brown sugar
Speaker 4: and some butter and some apple sauce and then wrapped it,
Speaker 4: wrapped it in butcher paper and then wrapped it in tinfoil.
Speaker 3: It was so good, so honey brown sugar. So I
Speaker 3: went to Texas Roadhouse and I ate four baskets of
Speaker 3: goddamn rolls of the rolls myself. Yeah, my stomach so
Speaker 3: bad because.
Speaker 5: I got to stop myself, like I eat one and
Speaker 5: then I pushed the basket away. I'm like, someone take it.
Speaker 5: When you got that roadhouse right by your house right there, yeah,
Speaker 5: right there, And the weight line is honestly not that bad.
Speaker 5: Most of the time. It's you guys.
Speaker 4: Everything over there.
Speaker 5: Yeah, that both parking lots, the parking lot across the street.
Speaker 5: You should see the ship they're building in there. It's
Speaker 5: fucking crazy. And they got an Amazon building right down
Speaker 5: the road too, like it's its own and and a
Speaker 5: fucking hospital opened up right there. It's its own little
Speaker 5: city that's brewing, like they're gonna I bet you they're
Speaker 5: gonna branch off and it's gonna be a new city
Speaker 5: for South Vegas.
Speaker 3: Well, the second the hospital goes in, I think it
Speaker 3: has to. I think it can.
Speaker 5: Yeah, and it's a it's a like I think it's
Speaker 5: a county hospital too.
Speaker 3: No, no, no, I think the second hospital goes.
Speaker 5: It's East Henderson Campus, so it's still a Henderson hospital.
Speaker 5: But but I wonder, like I'm like.
Speaker 3: Dude, think it's branch Government's name. It's government name.
Speaker 5: Did you hit me, Bob yet?
Speaker 3: No?
Speaker 4: No, And I'm not gonna drink the whole thing because
Speaker 4: there's too much sugar in it.
Speaker 5: But oh, you should just dump it. Just dump it
Speaker 5: and see if like an it comes out. Just dump
Speaker 5: it right here in the closet on the right, right
Speaker 5: down in the closets, right right in front of us,
Speaker 5: so we can all see it, and the listeners too.
Speaker 5: If we post the video, which we're not. But except
Speaker 5: for Labar, who love you?
Speaker 4: Fuck yourself, Chris, I love you all right.
Speaker 5: You should have seen the hesitation in his face when
Speaker 5: he said it. He like honestly felt so bad when he.
Speaker 4: Can I just say that like it fucking loser, all right? Well,
Speaker 4: Dad's on day Quill episode one sixty four. Uh catch
Speaker 4: next week, peace out later.
Speaker 3: Do you guys hear about that stressed man who is
Speaker 3: gonna try the Chinese thing with needles opium?
Speaker 6: No?
Speaker 5: But I bet his name was Seymour butts, nobody sees
Speaker 5: more busting New Uncle Tony shout out to Heavyway.
Speaker 1: Buddy Bundy
Speaker 6: E