Speaker 1: I think that that did exist for uh in this
Speaker 1: million years, and it was lost as soon as we
Speaker 1: got into large scale civilization.
Speaker 2: How Uh, it's gouldn't be lay to do that? Is
Speaker 2: I mean, don't doesn't well need a tribal structure and
Speaker 2: you're yourself the same so needs.
Speaker 1: Trying to well, not necessarily you see, we have to
Speaker 1: explore you see it. We mustn't make assumptions of necessity
Speaker 1: because they'll trap us. Right if you say we need
Speaker 1: this it it's it's an assumption. Now that could mean
Speaker 1: it's impossible that that m. The impossibility may arise from
Speaker 1: the assumption, right, That's why you would have to watch
Speaker 1: the assumptions. Now, hey, Uh, the point is, uh, what
Speaker 1: were suggesting is that we could just get together groups
Speaker 1: of twenty to forty and see if we can do it,
Speaker 1: not for the purpose of establishing a group, but for
Speaker 1: the purpose of exploring communication, right, and if we could,
Speaker 1: this might be a germ. It would uh You see,
Speaker 1: I say culture is shared meaning which is now incoherent.
Speaker 1: But if we uh could do this, we would have
Speaker 1: a kind of uh see, in the beginning of this
Speaker 1: group is a microcosm of the whole culture. With all
Speaker 1: its diversity and well not really diversity of all its incoherence.
Speaker 3: Ah did you stop it? Andy? Oh, come on, old.
Speaker 2: M see okay, Uh you were told me about the
Speaker 2: use of groups. Yes, perhaps you'd like to go on
Speaker 2: with yes. Uh.
Speaker 1: Well, you see, I think that if we make a
Speaker 1: group like this, it starts out as a microcosm of
Speaker 1: our society and you will have in it all the problems,
Speaker 1: you know, people fighting over their opinions and defending their
Speaker 1: ages and so on. Uh, and you have to work
Speaker 1: through it. I think, Uh it it takes a certain
Speaker 1: amount of knowledge and skill and uh, somebody a facilitator
Speaker 1: to help. Uh people who just arbitrary try this or not.
Speaker 1: People succeed.
Speaker 2: And the.
Speaker 1: But I think you can get through it take sustained work,
Speaker 1: sometimes as much as maybe a year. You see, regularly
Speaker 1: once a week.
Speaker 2: What is this? And you're now talking about literally a
Speaker 2: sort of almost tribes of interest.
Speaker 3: Tribes of interest.
Speaker 1: Well, no, they don't have to. We would have a
Speaker 1: variegated group who haven't They would be interested in dialogue,
Speaker 1: you see, we would say why are they in dialogue?
Speaker 1: Because they see the significance of it, they see the
Speaker 1: value of it. And therefore they form the purpose. It's
Speaker 1: not to impose the purpose. But if these people can
Speaker 1: see the significance and value, then they will have the purpose. Right,
Speaker 1: they will stick.
Speaker 3: Listen. I'm gonna always bring some of the legendary thought
Speaker 3: leaders to the voice of reason. That was doctor David Baum,
Speaker 3: author of Wholeness and the Implicate Order. He was Batman
Speaker 3: and Robin to Krishna Murty's batman. They did several books together,
Speaker 3: several lectures together, and they fell out. Oh, they fell out.
Speaker 3: Uncle Hurty was like, you're too dependent on your wife.
Speaker 3: That's what he told him. Hurty was like, bruh, where
Speaker 3: there is real love, there are no needs. Yikes, he was.
Speaker 3: If i'm your friend, I'm going to tell you the truth.
Speaker 3: You're too dependent on your wife. David Baum hit back,
Speaker 3: of course, this is a genius level theoretical physicists, he said,
Speaker 3: And you're more of a guru, then you would like
Speaker 3: to mention, because you know, Christiana Murty, I'm not a guru.
Speaker 3: I'm not a follower. He was like, your followers treat
Speaker 3: you like a guru, so in fact, you demonstrate guru.
Speaker 3: And they fell out. I think they got back together, right,
Speaker 3: near the time, Kay was passing on. But the reason
Speaker 3: why I'm playing this because I think it's important. He's
Speaker 3: talking on a macro scale about communication. There's an impasse.
Speaker 3: He was like, tribal communication. People have their own ideas
Speaker 3: and agendas, and that leads me to the topic. Precious
Speaker 3: just be. She's a topic fairy just they just be
Speaker 3: showing up, like this topic came from last week's discussion
Speaker 3: and she said one thing, and I wrote it down
Speaker 3: and developed an entire topic. Tonight's topic. You're listening to
Speaker 3: Wholeness Wednesdays. You already know it. It is Precious Magill
Speaker 3: is in the building. She's gonna keep it real. The
Speaker 3: grill is hot. Tonight's topic, The flow of letting versus
Speaker 3: the strategy of vetting. All you hear all these relationship
Speaker 3: folks out here talking about I'll show you how to
Speaker 3: get a man to pick a man? You ask him
Speaker 3: these questions. You gotta have these kind of expectations. Listen.
Speaker 3: The flow of letting versus the strategy of vetting A
Speaker 3: deeper inquiry into whether consciousness evolves through better partner selection.
Speaker 3: My boy picker is broke, my woman picker is broke.
Speaker 3: I hear it all the time. Yes, it can never
Speaker 3: be broken. Get back. A deeper inquiry into whether consciousness
Speaker 3: evolves through better partner selection, which some of us have
Speaker 3: spiritualized and called discernment. Knock it off, okay, I'm sorry,
Speaker 3: your wound can't be discerning it okay, never mind, or
Speaker 3: through allowing a new self to be born inside a
Speaker 3: relationship letting versus vetting. This is deep deeper investigation into
Speaker 3: whether we have mistake in psychological screening for human transformation.
Speaker 3: Come on, I'm not done. A deeper investigation into why
Speaker 3: the wound itself calls it discernment while the emerging self
Speaker 3: calls it surrender. Eighty get to your phone line, get
Speaker 3: ready to get ready, to get ready, to get ready, to
Speaker 3: get ready. Before a child ever learns language, the nervous
Speaker 3: system begins writing scripture. Wow, and then there's that right.
Speaker 3: Every race becomes a sentence, Every absence becomes a definition. Yikes.
Speaker 3: Every inconsistency becomes a prophecy. Long before consciousness asks who
Speaker 3: am I, survival has already answered, become whoever keeps you connected?
Speaker 3: One eight hundred nine twenty fifteen eighty. We're gonna get
Speaker 3: it tonight need performs a miracle, It keeps the infinite alive. Then, unnoticed,
Speaker 3: the miracle becomes a monarchy. The needs dictate and govern
Speaker 3: all your choices. They must be fulfilled either by you
Speaker 3: or somebody else, in preferably somebody else. All the architecture
Speaker 3: that once served survival quietly begins governing identity. Self worth
Speaker 3: becomes negotiated, Love becomes verified, Presence becomes performance. Effort becomes evidence.
Speaker 3: You got to show me, yeah, show me, ah. The
Speaker 3: first environment does not merely teach relationship. It teaches consciousness
Speaker 3: on how to interrupt itself. Yes, precious, you started this mass.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, I did the flow of letting.
Speaker 3: Why is it that we're so afraid of letting, allowing
Speaker 3: letting things be? And why do we think we're smart
Speaker 3: enough to actually vet someone right the wounds?
Speaker 4: So where do we start?
Speaker 5: So there are certain spiritual principles that govern this conversation,
Speaker 5: and the foundational one is allowance and the art of
Speaker 5: allowing right versus control. And when we are going through
Speaker 5: the vetting process, we are looking for exclusion criteria or
Speaker 5: inclusion criteria, and that is a process that doesn't allow
Speaker 5: for authenticity.
Speaker 4: Right, I was watching this married.
Speaker 5: At first sight, and the lady had a criteria that
Speaker 5: her husband needed to make at least like one hundred
Speaker 5: and seventy thousand dollars a year, and they matched her
Speaker 5: with someone who made considerably less. So when she and
Speaker 5: he had this conversation, she's saying, I know I said that,
Speaker 5: but I made that a criteria because I thought it
Speaker 5: was going to get me something. But you're giving me
Speaker 5: something that I actually need.
Speaker 3: I wasn't even looking for.
Speaker 5: That she wasn't even looking for, And that's presence, very
Speaker 5: emotionally emotionally available to her. So this is a a
Speaker 5: great example of when you vet sometimes you are excluding
Speaker 5: someone that has a gift for you, right, And when
Speaker 5: you allow you get to organically see who a person is.
Speaker 3: And just because you're hypervigilant, and does it mean you're psychic?
Speaker 3: And so some people think the wound's legislature, the wound's laws, right,
Speaker 3: are predictive.
Speaker 5: Yeah, well, see this is why it's the wound that's
Speaker 5: actually doing the vetting, telling you you need to have
Speaker 5: better discernment because then we can get this. Well, you
Speaker 5: can get that, but it might be cloaking something that
Speaker 5: you really don't want.
Speaker 4: To deal with Here's the deal, pickle.
Speaker 5: The only relationship that you're ever having is the one
Speaker 5: that you're having with self. So if you have all
Speaker 5: of these negative experiences, this person is providing the mirror
Speaker 5: for you to show you what you have left to
Speaker 5: work on. So each person is a golden teacher. We
Speaker 5: get upset with them and we really should be looking.
Speaker 4: To self.
Speaker 3: But it's hard when self is a scary place. When
Speaker 3: did self become scary?
Speaker 5: Well, because we are groomed, socialized to live life in
Speaker 5: a certain way, and you can see evidence in this
Speaker 5: if you switch from culture to culture. But the true
Speaker 5: emergence of self is something that when they say, oh,
Speaker 5: don't cry, oh don't hold your pen like that. You
Speaker 5: know they used to tell my daughter she's holding her
Speaker 5: pen wrong. Listen, she's a genius. Let her hold You
Speaker 5: want to meet about this, Let her to hold her pen.
Speaker 3: The way she wants to.
Speaker 4: She's coloring the wrong. Is that possible? I allowed my.
Speaker 5: Children to be themselves. I got a lot of flak
Speaker 5: for it. My daughter is a master of art. Now
Speaker 5: she has a master's in fine arts, but she didn't
Speaker 5: need that. She was a master at heart with them.
Speaker 5: So sorry, she just naturally wasn't is an artist from
Speaker 5: the jump. I allowed my children to express themselves. So
Speaker 5: in a dating relationship, you really want to know who
Speaker 5: a person is. Allow them to be who they are fully.
Speaker 3: The precious hold on, hold on, that's the right answer, yo. Allow. Yeah,
Speaker 3: this is the Tao of letting versus the strategy right
Speaker 3: of betting. So I hear what you said, but let
Speaker 3: me just throw something out there.
Speaker 4: Yes, throw it.
Speaker 3: Wounds are really the bully in the relationship. And if
Speaker 3: you have an unhealed wound, the wound has an agenda,
Speaker 3: and then how do we recontextualize that agenda for today's
Speaker 3: modern relationships? Be intentional?
Speaker 5: That that is one the wound wants you to be intentional. Right,
Speaker 5: Intentional should be more about where you are, not with
Speaker 5: the It shouldn't be your intention shouldn't be governing another person.
Speaker 6: Right.
Speaker 5: My intention is to be present, to be open, to
Speaker 5: bring myself in alignment versus my intention is to find
Speaker 5: the right person.
Speaker 4: A lot of times.
Speaker 5: We are very picky, and we still pick the wrong person.
Speaker 5: We're hyper visual. Okay, thank you, running back spirit. It's
Speaker 5: not that we pick the wrong person. We're looking through
Speaker 5: the wrong lens. Yes, it is yourself. It's more about
Speaker 5: how you're showing up. Le's about how the other person
Speaker 5: is showing up. This vetting is really a template for control.
Speaker 3: And an opportunity to seize it from the wound that's
Speaker 3: actually doing the picking.
Speaker 5: Yeah, people are so performative because they want they want
Speaker 5: to have connection, so they want to know what's on
Speaker 5: your list. They want to show up in that way.
Speaker 5: I like authenticity, show me all of you, not so
Speaker 5: that I can pick, so that we can merge in
Speaker 5: the way that we're supposed to.
Speaker 3: Gosh, do you think getting the opposite about how the
Speaker 3: opposite of how you feel about yourself will make you
Speaker 3: feel better? This is how we approach relationships. I don't
Speaker 3: think I'm worthy. Yeah, I don't think I deserve. Then
Speaker 3: we flip it, yes I deserve, but we don't really
Speaker 3: believe that we deserve. Belief comes on the receipt of
Speaker 3: what we are desirous of. Right, I'm saying no, no, no,
Speaker 3: see a the way you must become what you seek, Well,
Speaker 3: then you don't have to look nowhere.
Speaker 5: This is the only way you in seeking, This is
Speaker 5: the only way you in needing. You become that which
Speaker 5: you seek.
Speaker 4: We're there tonight, tonight, we are listen.
Speaker 3: I had folks in the cigar lounge tonight telling me
Speaker 3: I wasn't born in sin. I said to me metaphorically,
Speaker 3: because they was listening to the show last night.
Speaker 4: Okay, okay, okay.
Speaker 3: To me metaphorically, the original sin is need, and the
Speaker 3: only reason why it becomes the sin is because it
Speaker 3: was a survival mechanism for childhood that you carried into
Speaker 3: your adulthood. Stay right there, don't go nowhere, Lord have mercy.
Speaker 3: We on fire already when we come forward more from homeless.
Speaker 1: Wisdoms are internally related to every thing, not externally related.
Speaker 1: Consciousness is an internal relationship to the whole. We take
Speaker 1: in the whole, and we act or the whole, and
Speaker 1: that internal whatever we have taken in determines basically what
Speaker 1: we are.
Speaker 6: Quantum physicist and philosopher David Bohm was profoundly affected by
Speaker 6: his close contacts with both Einstein and Jay Krishna Murti.
Speaker 6: Bohm's theory of wholeness and the implicate order states that
Speaker 6: there is something like life and mind and folded in everything.
Speaker 1: Well, so see, I think the difficulty is this fragmentation.
Speaker 1: First of all, everybody is all thought is broken up
Speaker 1: into bits like this nation, this country, this industry, this profession,
Speaker 1: and so on, as they can't meet, and it's extremely
Speaker 1: hard to break into that now. The second, but that
Speaker 1: comes about primarily because thought has developed traditionally in a
Speaker 1: way such that it claims not to be affecting anything,
Speaker 1: but just tell you the way things are. Therefore, people
Speaker 1: cannot see that they're creating a problem and then apparently
Speaker 1: trying to solve it. That s let's take the problem.
Speaker 1: What problem do you like? Pollution or the ecology? See,
Speaker 1: the ecology is not in itself a problem. It works
Speaker 1: perfectly well by itself. It's due to us, right, it's
Speaker 1: a problem because we are thinking in a certain way
Speaker 1: by breaking everything up in each person's doing his own
Speaker 1: thing right now, Therefore, the ecological problem is due to thought. Right,
Speaker 1: But thought thinks it is a problem out there and
Speaker 1: I must solve it. Now. That doesn't make sense because
Speaker 1: simultaneously thought is doing all the activities which make the problem,
Speaker 1: and then there's another set of activities to try to
Speaker 1: overcome it. You see, it doesn't stop doing the things
Speaker 1: which are making the ecological problem. Or the national problem
Speaker 1: or whatever the problem is. The earth is one household. Really,
Speaker 1: we're not treating it that way, right, So that's the
Speaker 1: first step in the economics is to say the earth
Speaker 1: is one household and all that it depends on. It's
Speaker 1: all one, you see, So now the implicate order would
Speaker 1: help us to see that, to see everything and fools everything, everybody.
Speaker 3: Okay, I'm sorry, I know, I let him ride. Doctor
Speaker 3: David Baum talking about the implicate order. But psychologically speaking,
Speaker 3: when he's talking about this psychological fragmentation, a psychologist will
Speaker 3: call that the ego, right, the sense of me. Christianna
Speaker 3: Murti would call that the center. You think you can
Speaker 3: discern who your partner is, right, vet them out based
Speaker 3: on a performance that you've got to buy, because when
Speaker 3: you buy their performance, you consent to the version of
Speaker 3: themselves they sold to you. Now, allowance is coming, that's
Speaker 3: coming from another level of.
Speaker 4: Consciousness, completely different side of the room.
Speaker 3: And we're afraid to allow Why logical nudity, vulnerability, openness,
Speaker 3: all of the things that you mentioned in the first
Speaker 3: thirty minutes, these are things healed people do, or let
Speaker 3: me say it in another way, people do. Right, They're
Speaker 3: not afraid to put themselves directly in alignment with more pain.
Speaker 4: Talk to me, yeah, this is.
Speaker 7: You.
Speaker 5: Ask a question like why do people do this? They're
Speaker 5: afraid of losing themselves?
Speaker 3: Stay right there, Okay, they're afraid of losing themselves. Don't
Speaker 3: lose that. When I come back, I need you to
Speaker 3: dive deep will into why they're afraid of losing themselves.
Speaker 8: So why does good sex X so often faid, even
Speaker 8: for couples who continue to love each other as much
Speaker 8: as ever? And why does good intimacy not guarantee you
Speaker 8: good SA contrary to popular belief? Or the next question
Speaker 8: would be can we want what we already have? That's
Speaker 8: the million dollar question, right? And why is the forbidden
Speaker 8: so erotic? What is it about transgression that makes desire
Speaker 8: so potent? And why does sex make babies and babies
Speaker 8: spelerotic disaster in couples? The fatal erotic blow, isn't it?
Speaker 8: And when you love how does it feel? And when
Speaker 8: you desire how is it different? These are some of
Speaker 8: the questions that are at the center of my exploration
Speaker 8: on the nature of erotic desire and its concomitant dilemmas
Speaker 8: in modern love. So I travel the globe, and what
Speaker 8: I'm noticing is that everywhere where romanticism has entered, there
Speaker 8: seems to be a crisis of desire, a crisis of
Speaker 8: desire as in owning the wanting desire as an expression
Speaker 8: of our individuality, of our free show of our preferences,
Speaker 8: of our identity, desire that has become a central concept
Speaker 8: as part of modern love and individualistic societies.
Speaker 4: You know, this is the first time in.
Speaker 8: The history of humankind where we are trying to experience
Speaker 8: sexuality in the long term, not because we want fourteen children,
Speaker 8: for which we need to have even more because many
Speaker 8: of them won't make it, and not because it is
Speaker 8: exclusively a woman's merital duty.
Speaker 6: This is the first.
Speaker 8: Time that we want sex over time about pleasure and
Speaker 8: connection that is rooted in desire. So what sustains desire
Speaker 8: and why is it so difficult? And at a heart
Speaker 8: of sustaining desire in a committed relationship, I think is
Speaker 8: the reconciliation of two fundamental human needs. On the one hand,
Speaker 8: our need for security, for predictability, for safety, for dependability,
Speaker 8: for reliability, for permanence, all these anchoring grounding experiences of
Speaker 8: our lives that we call home, but we also have
Speaker 8: an equally strong need men and women for adventure, for novelty,
Speaker 8: for mystery, for risk.
Speaker 3: Andy, who was that Esther Perrell? I should have known
Speaker 3: from the accent and she was cooking. But I would
Speaker 3: say in the opposite direction, back to anchoring need, right,
Speaker 3: the need of the other, the need of the person.
Speaker 3: And this ties us back to what you were talking
Speaker 3: about when we first came forward, and that is the
Speaker 3: fear of yourself.
Speaker 5: Yeah, this self that people fear losing is something that
Speaker 5: they are building in a linear sense, like you get
Speaker 5: all this foundational knowledge, going to school, achieving certain things.
Speaker 5: People are building themselves, but usually in the more that
Speaker 5: my allergies excuse me. Usually the more you're building, it's
Speaker 5: away from the true self. This is why a lot
Speaker 5: of times people make it to the pinnacle of their
Speaker 5: career and they have a sense of a breakdown, like
Speaker 5: I've done all these things and I'm still not happy.
Speaker 5: This is a gift, this feeling of dissatisfaction because there's
Speaker 5: no more to achieve, but there's something to be And
Speaker 5: this is usually when people start navigating themselves to I
Speaker 5: want to just take a year off of work and
Speaker 5: find the true meaning of life.
Speaker 4: You the true essence of who you are.
Speaker 5: This cannot be built, It has to be allowed. It
Speaker 5: is an emergence of self. And if we look at
Speaker 5: our relationships in that same way, we will move away
Speaker 5: from the vetting process and be open to allowing a
Speaker 5: person to just be themselves. So what does that mean
Speaker 5: If I'm going on a date with you and I say, hey,
Speaker 5: I don't like that kind of language, don't curse around me.
Speaker 4: Okay, fine, you'll.
Speaker 5: Get the performative self of the person versus if you
Speaker 5: can't tolerate that type of language, then go be somewhere
Speaker 5: where they don't speak that way. Allow people to be
Speaker 5: who they are truly. I'm gonna get married so that
Speaker 5: I can. Then I'll be good then and I'll just
Speaker 5: sleep with one person. No, that's not for you, right,
Speaker 5: You're trying to fit into something in a sense of
Speaker 5: building yourself to be something instead of allowing who you
Speaker 5: truly are.
Speaker 3: Now, strip it all the way down. If I have
Speaker 3: a strategy, yes for vetting, strip it all the way
Speaker 3: down to the ground. Yeah, what are you vetting? And
Speaker 3: for what purpose? Right to receive to fill.
Speaker 4: A need or to feel safety, to fill that need.
Speaker 3: Now there's a sister in the KBLA chat. She hasn't
Speaker 3: She made a statement and we all know here the
Speaker 3: voice of reason. We accept everybody's thoughts. Jilly Tree. At
Speaker 3: Jilly Tree in the KBLA chat, she says, so, y'all
Speaker 3: jealous of Black American women? Right?
Speaker 4: Does she see the black woman in here?
Speaker 3: And then she goes on to say, we black women
Speaker 3: fought for this and we ain't going she said, and
Speaker 3: we ain't going it up. I don't know what going
Speaker 3: it up means?
Speaker 4: This is interesting.
Speaker 3: I don't know.
Speaker 4: Can she only see you on the camera? Am I
Speaker 4: jealous of me?
Speaker 3: Well, hopefully she can get some coherent questions in the
Speaker 3: chat and I'll read them. I would definitely love to
Speaker 3: share this platform with her. But let me just be clear.
Speaker 3: Allowance is a high consciousness, right, It's a high state
Speaker 3: of consciousness to allow. Look at how many times you
Speaker 3: disallow your authentic self from emerging into your conscious mind? Right?
Speaker 3: Are you vetting different parts of yourself? Right with regards
Speaker 3: to what you show to another? And if you're doing
Speaker 3: that to yourself, you will probably inevitably do that to others.
Speaker 3: Could that not then be a point of contention for
Speaker 3: conflict to arise in relationships.
Speaker 4: For sure, for sure, you know it.
Speaker 5: There's something about having social decorm right, carrying yourself in
Speaker 5: a certain way so that you can be in social settings.
Speaker 5: But this isn't what we're talking about. We're talking about relationships.
Speaker 5: The intimacy of relationships, whether they're interpersonal or romantic, familial,
Speaker 5: allowing people to be who they are. It is necessary
Speaker 5: to learn about the ways of society. This is what
Speaker 5: I'm speaking about decorm so that you can move through society.
Speaker 5: But we're talking about when you're getting an intimate, intimate relationship,
Speaker 5: you're looking for somebody that exists off of a list.
Speaker 5: You're cross referencing a list. Must make this amount of money,
Speaker 5: must have this amount of education, must be a Christian.
Speaker 5: You're picking these things because you think they're going to
Speaker 5: deliver to you a set of circumstances so that you
Speaker 5: can be happy, and you're going out backwards when you
Speaker 5: think in those terms. Look for someone that is in
Speaker 5: vibrational alignment with you, So you have to look at
Speaker 5: the vibration of who you are right in order to
Speaker 5: understand that my vibration cannot be captured and put on
Speaker 5: a list.
Speaker 3: Listen. You are cooking in such a rarefied way. Like
Speaker 3: I said, when I listen to you, all these thoughts.
Speaker 4: Start to come out. Heah, I love that.
Speaker 3: So one of your main keys is being when we
Speaker 3: come forward, something in my mind just blew up. As
Speaker 3: Precious was talking. We're going to share it.
Speaker 9: On the other side, Terry says, longing for a felt
Speaker 9: sense of connection is a primary need, especially it comes
Speaker 9: up when we're threatened. Emotional isolation is inherently traumatizing. This
Speaker 9: is wide into your nervous system. This is not cultural,
Speaker 9: This is not about cultural context. This is just who
Speaker 9: you are as a human being. Basically, connection with others
Speaker 9: is the best survival strategy we ever came up with
Speaker 9: as a species. And isn't it interesting? In this virus
Speaker 9: that's happening, physical connection with others is challenged, But if
Speaker 9: I trust us, we can still find ways to stay
Speaker 9: emotionally connected. I don't know if you guys saw this
Speaker 9: amazing YouTube that's going around of people in Italy standing
Speaker 9: out on their balconies singing to each other. This warmed
Speaker 9: my heart. They're singing to each other, only in Italy,
Speaker 9: with they sing I don't know quite what they do
Speaker 9: in Canada say oh, dear, would you like some tea
Speaker 9: or something? But in Italy they sing to each other.
Speaker 9: They're keeping the emotional connection because emotional isolation primes helplessness.
Speaker 9: In us, safe haven connection calms our nervous system, gives
Speaker 9: us emotional balance and tells us that distress is manageable.
Speaker 9: So then we can stay engaged with that distress. We
Speaker 9: can find a way through it, rather than avoiding it,
Speaker 9: shutting it down, fighting it.
Speaker 3: Whoever these people think they are, they not? Who was
Speaker 3: that Andy Sue Sue Johnson. Okay, it's clinically sound, it's
Speaker 3: clinically accurate.
Speaker 5: But there was something that Sue said. There are people
Speaker 5: on the balcony singing to each other. They're experiencing connection.
Speaker 5: What was the criteria for them to be on the balcony.
Speaker 5: It's just flow, It's just connection, right. This is a
Speaker 5: better indicator of how well will get along. If you
Speaker 5: sit down and you have a blind conversation and you
Speaker 5: get on very well with someone and there is no performance,
Speaker 5: it's just flow, right, You're feeling the heart, the soul
Speaker 5: of the person. You're gonna mess it up if you
Speaker 5: start asking them the education level, have they been incarcerated,
Speaker 5: do they smoke?
Speaker 4: Do they drink?
Speaker 5: Because these things have something to do with their choices, right,
Speaker 5: And what we really are seeking is connection. I get
Speaker 5: to meet people from all over the world, every walk
Speaker 5: of life, different experiences, and we are in session, heart
Speaker 5: to heart, whether they're virtual or in my office. And
Speaker 5: it's no judgment. I don't even need to know a
Speaker 5: lot of the stuff that you do and.
Speaker 3: Precious for people who are just tuning in, Yes, tell
Speaker 3: them what is the topic because we just you know
Speaker 3: how we do. We pulled. Yes, tell them what we've
Speaker 3: been talking about.
Speaker 5: We're basically talking about the difference of allowing flow in
Speaker 5: connection with someone versus the need for our wound to
Speaker 5: vet people because it is the wound.
Speaker 4: I know that's not the.
Speaker 5: Exact name or title of the topic, but it is
Speaker 5: the wound that is doing the vetting.
Speaker 3: You cook it right.
Speaker 5: We're bringing people up to speed with where we are
Speaker 5: going into our second hour. The wound is the one
Speaker 5: that needs you to have X, Y and Z because
Speaker 5: this is going to keep you safe. You can find X,
Speaker 5: Y and Z, it's still not going to bring you peace.
Speaker 3: So the flow of letting versus the strategy of vetting.
Speaker 4: That's it.
Speaker 3: That's ladies and gentlemen, you've just tuned into the second
Speaker 3: hour of the Voice of Reason and precious and I
Speaker 3: are in here trip it tonight because I know it's
Speaker 3: counterintuitive to what you were taught. And I'm listening to
Speaker 3: the clinician Sue Johnson, that was just speaking. And it's
Speaker 3: not that she's clinically incongruent, right, she's in alignment with
Speaker 3: the teaching. I'm saying the teaching is wrong. Right, I'm
Speaker 3: saying the teaching is wrong because guess what we want? Connection?
Speaker 3: No one ever said why do we want connection? Right? Well,
Speaker 3: why does separation exist? Connection implies disconnection? Right? Is it union?
Speaker 3: Is it communion? Like, why do we need connection? Why
Speaker 3: do needs exist at all?
Speaker 5: Talk to people, Well, it's that it's not that we
Speaker 5: need connection. It's a part of our design to be connected. Right,
Speaker 5: So we're going to connect whenever in order for us
Speaker 5: not to connect with other people, we will be in isolation. Okay,
Speaker 5: so this is something that is also a part of
Speaker 5: that flow. But a lot of times we build a
Speaker 5: design around what we need or think we need because
Speaker 5: we think it's going to deliver us a set of circumstances.
Speaker 5: But the reality is is when you allow the flow
Speaker 5: with people are afraid to flow because they're like, I
Speaker 5: don't want to make a mistake. You're gonna make a mistake.
Speaker 4: You're human.
Speaker 5: And when you are engaging the spirit, you will get
Speaker 5: divine intervention on how to operate. Whether it be like
Speaker 5: for me, I will get people will have a certain
Speaker 5: smell to me and it communicates information, you know, So
Speaker 5: if I smell that smell, I know what that means. Right,
Speaker 5: that means halt or the spirit will put me in
Speaker 5: a position where I'm not able to connect with that
Speaker 5: person again. So you're trying to protect yourself and that's
Speaker 5: God's job. So allow God to do its job. You
Speaker 5: stop trying to play God and allow yourself to be
Speaker 5: with the person authentically and see how you guys vibrate
Speaker 5: together in or out.
Speaker 3: Are you saying somebody who's a control freak is trying
Speaker 3: to play God in relationships?
Speaker 5: Oh, if you control freak, you're trying to play God
Speaker 5: period in and out of relationships. It's like going to
Speaker 5: your friends to see what they think. You are messing
Speaker 5: yourself up. This is not your friend's relationship. Do you
Speaker 5: not have a mind of your own? Do you not
Speaker 5: feel your spirit?
Speaker 4: Do you not.
Speaker 5: Trust the God in you enough to inform you that
Speaker 5: you have to go ask somebody so that you can
Speaker 5: go in and out?
Speaker 3: That reminds me of Quincy Jones. He said, you want
Speaker 3: to see He said, you want to make God leave
Speaker 3: the room. Hmmm, the room of your life. Try to
Speaker 3: control everything, that's it, he said. God is your co
Speaker 3: pilot for life, and the moment you try to control everything,
Speaker 3: he'll leave you in the cockpit of your life by yourself.
Speaker 4: You do you listen when we come forward? For some reason,
Speaker 4: we gonna keep cooking.
Speaker 3: We got an hour number two coming up.
Speaker 10: Hello everyone, welcome to Soul Sessions with Creative Mind. I'm
Speaker 10: Deba Bhah Maldonado. I'm here with doctor Rob Maldonado and
Speaker 10: we have a special guest on our podcast today, Doctor
Speaker 10: James hollis author of many books Young and Analysts, and
Speaker 10: we're so excited to share that interview. But before we begin,
Speaker 10: I would love for you to click the button here
Speaker 10: on the corner if you're watching us on YouTube, to
Speaker 10: subscribe to our channel, so you did not miss an episode.
Speaker 10: So we had an incredible interview with doctor Hollis.
Speaker 11: Yeah, well it's a dream come true for me. You know,
Speaker 11: we always half jokingly ask ourselves if this was a dream,
Speaker 11: how would we interpret this for us? Doctor Hollis represents
Speaker 11: the archetypal man of knowledge, holding up the lamp of
Speaker 11: wisdom so that everyone can find their true path. So
Speaker 11: it's a special interview that we did. And he's just
Speaker 11: full of wisdom, so generous with his time, so willing
Speaker 11: to share his knowledge of Youngian psychology. So thank you
Speaker 11: for tuning in.
Speaker 10: And I had many many goosebumps during that interview, So
Speaker 10: we can't wait for you to hear it. So it's
Speaker 10: coming right now.
Speaker 12: I may not have anything to do with making you
Speaker 12: wealthy or successful and by social standards, but it's something
Speaker 12: in you that is imperious, that's demanding, that is wishing expression,
Speaker 12: and it's about becoming who you are, and that's why
Speaker 12: we're here in the first place. Each of us is
Speaker 12: a tiny chip in a large mosaic, and we may
Speaker 12: feel insignificant times, but then you take those chips away,
Speaker 12: and what is the mosaic? It's deprived. So intividuation is
Speaker 12: simply a word for the natural developmental process that's built
Speaker 12: into us genetically, Yes, and struggle to recover a relationship
Speaker 12: to it and to serve that rather than you know,
Speaker 12: serve whatever the environmental demands might be at any given moment.
Speaker 13: Absolutely, how do we do this? I mean, given that
Speaker 13: we know now there's a strong genetic component right to behavior.
Speaker 13: The behavioral genetics has given us a different perspective than
Speaker 13: in Jung's time of what forces are shaping our personality.
Speaker 13: So we have a behavioral.
Speaker 14: Genetics, We have epigenetics now, our understanding of how our
Speaker 14: forefathers experiences are passed down to us and how we
Speaker 14: inherit those processes. And also of course the powerful force
Speaker 14: of conditioning the things we experience in our families and
Speaker 14: in our culture.
Speaker 3: Andy, who is that my friend? Because they were cooking.
Speaker 3: James Hollis was cooking once they led him.
Speaker 4: That mosaic is the connection that I speak was speaking.
Speaker 3: Of, Yeah, they were cooking. Tonight's topic is a really
Speaker 3: big and ambitious topic, and I think it's important that
Speaker 3: I reframe it so you guys can get a grasp
Speaker 3: of what we're talking about. Vetting, the strategic vetting that
Speaker 3: many of us do, that we recontextualize as discernment versus
Speaker 3: the way and the flow of allowing. The reason why
Speaker 3: I'm doing this topic is because I'm not gonna push back,
Speaker 3: but I'm going to give some some context from my perspective.
Speaker 3: I think need is for the youth, for babies, for infants,
Speaker 3: for children. But I think we outgrow now, that's only
Speaker 3: if we do what the good doctor was talking about,
Speaker 3: and that's individuation. All of the ancient societies and cultures
Speaker 3: had a mystery system of spirituality that got you out
Speaker 3: of your ego, that got you out of your mind,
Speaker 3: that got you into a conscious stratum of oneness. When
Speaker 3: you're unhealed, oneness becomes pathological loneliness. Do you see? So,
Speaker 3: as long as the survival mechanism of need is turned on,
Speaker 3: there will be clinging, there will be desire. I need this,
Speaker 3: I need there. Do you understand all of the ancients
Speaker 3: knew you know, there's a pathway, Whether it's in the
Speaker 3: Hebrew Bible when they talk about Jacob's ladder and the
Speaker 3: angel was coming up and down the ladder, that's your
Speaker 3: spinal cord. You were talking about being in the last
Speaker 3: hour well, the ancient cometants, you know what the end
Speaker 3: of it is, or the whole desire for the ancient
Speaker 3: cometants through there, through the teachings of you know what
Speaker 3: the end was supposed to be. Every pharaoh desired to
Speaker 3: become a star. This is where Hollywood gets the concept
Speaker 3: of being a star, right, But what does a star do?
Speaker 3: B our Son has been being and beaman. There's not
Speaker 3: a lot of doing. It's being. Do you see the
Speaker 3: ancient Egyptians knew that it was like no, we going
Speaker 3: to Osiris, which later became serious b which you understand
Speaker 3: what I'm saying, That's what they were trying to say.
Speaker 3: I believe that Western psychology has framed it in such
Speaker 3: a way that need is a lifelong thing. And this
Speaker 3: is what Krishna Murty was telling doctor David Baum. He
Speaker 3: was saying, No, once you become love, once you embody
Speaker 3: the higher consciousness, the whole pursuing and bonding and connecting,
Speaker 3: there's no disconnection when you tap into God. There's only
Speaker 3: disconnection when you tap into Ego. Yes, when you tap
Speaker 3: into unhealed wounds. So that leads me back to tonight's topic.
Speaker 3: What is it letting versus vetting. The flow of allowance. Yes,
Speaker 3: Doctor David R. Hawkins talks about allowing very high level
Speaker 3: of consciousness, Yes, very high. In order to be vulnerable,
Speaker 3: you must allow, You must be open, You must be
Speaker 3: in the moment. The strategy of vetting is connected to
Speaker 3: what I'm getting and are you suitable to give it?
Speaker 3: And will there be any interruptions in the supply chain,
Speaker 3: because now I'm gonna demote you if there are. Perhaps
Speaker 3: this is why so many adults call it discernment, while
Speaker 3: living almost entirely inside of inherited conclusions. They believe they
Speaker 3: are evaluating another human being. Yet every act of vetting
Speaker 3: first passes through an invisible inheritance that predates their own memory.
Speaker 3: The mother room, that first room that cultivated who you
Speaker 3: think you are. It doesn't mean your mother was bad.
Speaker 3: She might have missed an opportunity here and there, and
Speaker 3: you may have metabolized it in some way that might
Speaker 3: not be good. What is a maladaptive? Maybe right, the
Speaker 3: mother room has already translated reality before reality has had
Speaker 3: even had an opportunity to speak. Perhaps every wisdom tradition
Speaker 3: has been circling this same mystery from different horizons Jung.
Speaker 3: Carl Jung asked whether we remain possessed by what we
Speaker 3: refuse to see hmm. Krish Na Murti questioned whether observation
Speaker 3: can exist without conclusion. Put that in modern day relationship,
Speaker 3: we it's gotta be a conclusion. The Tao refuses to
Speaker 3: force the river because the river never forgot how to
Speaker 3: become the ocean. Woo way, the Woo way, the Woo way,
Speaker 3: the woo wo woo, the woo wo whoop. The woo
Speaker 3: way suggests that life's deepest intelligence appears when compulsion releases
Speaker 3: its grip. Attachment theory describes the earliest architecture through which
Speaker 3: safety becomes internalized. Everybody's talking about safety in relationships, and
Speaker 3: nobody is talking about how to cultivate it within their
Speaker 3: own being precious? Why is that the case? Please help
Speaker 3: me understand.
Speaker 5: Well, most of what we are taught is to look outward.
Speaker 5: It's not until you get into a state of allowance,
Speaker 5: but before you allow you have to be Because when
Speaker 5: I start to talk about people to being to people,
Speaker 5: they're like, well I need to know what I need
Speaker 5: to do. Now you're looking at it. You have to
Speaker 5: turn inwards and just be be still.
Speaker 3: You mean like the sun.
Speaker 5: Yeah, you just the right. The sun is being but
Speaker 5: it is not inactive. It's active.
Speaker 4: It activates all of our solar system.
Speaker 3: Probably the oldest symbol of God in the universe that
Speaker 3: we know of is the sun.
Speaker 5: Yeah, that we know of, you know. But it's this.
Speaker 5: You have to first be willing to not know. That's
Speaker 5: your first step, right, and this is where people get
Speaker 5: afraid and they get ANTSI so that is also where
Speaker 5: the void enters. Move past that void, you're not you
Speaker 5: don't need to know.
Speaker 4: You just have to be willing to allow the emergence
Speaker 4: of self.
Speaker 3: So allowance is not seeking to arrive at a conclusion.
Speaker 3: So when we translate that back into so what is this?
Speaker 3: What are we doing right? What? What? What is this?
Speaker 4: I think I had this sounds last week.
Speaker 5: Now and it's you know, I don't care what you
Speaker 5: call it or what it looks like. You don't get
Speaker 5: to what it actually is until you allow yourself to
Speaker 5: be present and allow your partner or.
Speaker 4: Whoever to be Then you get to see what the
Speaker 4: truth is.
Speaker 5: And I know people think like, oh, well, these two
Speaker 5: must sit in a closet and meditate all the time.
Speaker 4: No, I'm single ish.
Speaker 3: No, thanks to what you don't know that was gay,
Speaker 3: I'm single.
Speaker 4: Ish and.
Speaker 5: It's the perfect ground for being what I am speaking of.
Speaker 5: So that means that a lot of times I don't know.
Speaker 5: I don't pretend to know either, But what I do
Speaker 5: know is what I am being, and I'm only allowing
Speaker 5: those things in my environment that are vibrationally in alignment
Speaker 5: with my being.
Speaker 3: Let's take it down to the marianas trench.
Speaker 4: Wounds gotta know, uh huh, they know everything.
Speaker 3: Wounds gotta know. And even when they don't know, you
Speaker 3: better know. Wounds are demanding. Wounds command nothing. Presence is command.
Speaker 3: Wounds are dmond. Yes, and that's what you said, and
Speaker 3: you promised, and you were supposed to and I believed.
Speaker 4: Yeah. Wah.
Speaker 3: All of that energy focused on the external. As you
Speaker 3: so eloquently pointed out, what happens if you turn it
Speaker 3: back into self and you start generating all of the
Speaker 3: things that are required of your person, you will find
Speaker 3: that those expectations of your person are no longer necessary
Speaker 3: for them to bring to you because you embody them.
Speaker 3: So when we start vetting people, who's doing the vetting right?
Speaker 5: The wounds always the wound, because that the the awakening
Speaker 5: of who you are. The emergence of who you are
Speaker 5: recognizes God inside of self as well as God inside
Speaker 5: of the other. And so if you're looking for God
Speaker 5: inside of the other, what's your criteria?
Speaker 3: Oh, take it deeper. If I know God is in me,
Speaker 3: which allows me to see God in you, then where's
Speaker 3: the separation between us?
Speaker 15: Oh?
Speaker 3: So we're back to oneness. So when you elevate the consciousness,
Speaker 3: you get to oneness. But when the consciousness is not elevated, stifled,
Speaker 3: now you're in loneliness. This is where the wound. That's
Speaker 3: why there's always gimme, gimme, gimme what you're gonna show
Speaker 3: up with. D you see unhealed? I need healed. I
Speaker 3: have because I am Exodus three fourteen. Speak on it.
Speaker 5: And what people do when they're in that space is
Speaker 5: they start building a new list because they're gonna pick
Speaker 5: better next time, versus just releasing allowing. It really is
Speaker 5: like a Jedi mind trick. You know, when you focus
Speaker 5: on the self, when you allow the emergency of self, things.
Speaker 4: Start to float in your direction.
Speaker 5: You don't have to go get it, you don't have
Speaker 5: to be in a space where you go, it shows
Speaker 5: up like wow, here we go. Every person that you
Speaker 5: meet is a teacher.
Speaker 3: Only if you're willing to learn.
Speaker 4: That's the only way you get taught.
Speaker 15: Uh.
Speaker 3: The Kabalian states, when the student is ready.
Speaker 4: The teacher appears.
Speaker 3: See. Somebody told me today, what are you doing to
Speaker 3: help these youngsters? You better get out there and teach
Speaker 3: these youngsters. I said, no, I only teach by invite.
Speaker 5: Yet do you know that a lot of times what
Speaker 5: a highly spiritually awakened meaning a person has maintenance. They've
Speaker 5: been doing this for a while. They build their spiritual energy.
Speaker 5: It is your being that edifies your environment. People will
Speaker 5: receive healing from you being.
Speaker 4: And it's not always bad.
Speaker 5: By watching you you wherever you're living, you're raising the vibration.
Speaker 5: This is how energy works. Versus I need to go
Speaker 5: and write on something and teach people what it is
Speaker 5: that I'm doing so they'll catch on you.
Speaker 4: All you have to do is be. It will vibrate
Speaker 4: you to where you need to be.
Speaker 3: Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, if every really being? Oh,
Speaker 3: I love it, I love it, I love it. We hey,
Speaker 3: we write up against the clock. We got callers to
Speaker 3: one eight nine, twenty fifteen eighty. I would love to
Speaker 3: hear from everybody across the country. Let's talk about it.
Speaker 3: If every relationship must first pass through your pattern before
Speaker 3: it reaches your heart, has your pattern become your actual spouse? See,
Speaker 3: people don't want me to talk the way I want
Speaker 3: to talk. Your pattern is your partner, and the physical
Speaker 3: manifestation or the mirror of your pattern becomes someone that
Speaker 3: has to fit into that pattern. And if they don't fit,
Speaker 3: guess what onto that? Let me say it again.
Speaker 4: If every relationship on to the next that looks just
Speaker 4: like the last.
Speaker 3: How about that? Just change your clothes. If every relationship
Speaker 3: must first pass through your pattern before it reaches your heart,
Speaker 3: has your pattern become your spouse? This is strategic vetting
Speaker 3: so I can secure and protect the wound. Right, if
Speaker 3: your partner or if your patterns possessed, has possessed veto
Speaker 3: power over every person you've ever loved? Why have you continue?
Speaker 3: You'd calling your romantic history your choices instead of your
Speaker 3: conditioned selections. That's it, Your conditioning is choosing. Listen, when
Speaker 3: we come forward, we got callers. Were gonna let Precious
Speaker 3: talk to these callers. Y'all want to talk to precious.
Speaker 3: Now is the time to do it. One eight hundred
Speaker 3: nine twenty fifteen eighty.
Speaker 15: I come from the unconscious, which literally is unconscious, the
Speaker 15: part of us that we do not know in ourselves,
Speaker 15: the part that can betray us and the situations that
Speaker 15: we would gladly be out of, the part that can
Speaker 15: push us way beyond what our ego would want to do,
Speaker 15: and the part in fact that our ego cannot control
Speaker 15: without some kind of discipline and learning how to dialogue
Speaker 15: with the unconscious force. The dream is like a picture
Speaker 15: of the unconscious taken from the from the nightly point
Speaker 15: of view. In other words, what you do during the
Speaker 15: day is mirrored in the dreams from the unconscious position
Speaker 15: at night, so that it will appear in consciousness from
Speaker 15: the ego position in the dream, from the soul position.
Speaker 15: So what we try to do in union analysis is
Speaker 15: set up a dialogue between conscious and unconscious. If experience
Speaker 15: is not coming from the body, it is not known.
Speaker 15: You can say I know I am going to die
Speaker 15: from my head. It's something totally different to be told
Speaker 15: that you've got six months to live, and it's coming
Speaker 15: from the body that knows it is going to die,
Speaker 15: so that, from my point of view, to work with
Speaker 15: dreams strictly from the head is to end up with
Speaker 15: knowledge that is not necessarily going to change your life.
Speaker 3: You wait a minute. I see where she's going. The
Speaker 3: language is a litlaft, but I see where she's going.
Speaker 3: She's saying, articulation is not actualization. Correct, That's why she
Speaker 3: said it has to happen in the body. She's actually
Speaker 3: describing the TikTok universe with all these people who know
Speaker 3: the right words, they got the therapy speak together, they
Speaker 3: can articulate their attachment style, right, and then they identify
Speaker 3: with it and it's like a zodiac sign to them now, right.
Speaker 3: But she's saying, when you gotta confront being a dismissive
Speaker 3: avoidant and somebody show, oh you real intimacy and love
Speaker 3: and what's happening in your body is saying retreat, Get
Speaker 3: the hell up out of here. This is your defense mechanism.
Speaker 3: This is what you use to survive your home. And
Speaker 3: this person has triggered you. Can you live in the
Speaker 3: trigger without judging the trigger, without condemning the feeling, Embrace
Speaker 3: the feeling with empathy, sympathy, love, compassion, without verdict, can
Speaker 3: you do that? See if you don't know how to
Speaker 3: do that in a relationship with someone else, is it
Speaker 3: a damn relationship at all?
Speaker 4: Right?
Speaker 3: Right? Right?
Speaker 5: In fact, I have been pretty vocal about engaging in
Speaker 5: that very process, not only entertaining the things that I
Speaker 5: looked for, right, I had to allow indifference, or I
Speaker 5: had to go through the process right to it, and
Speaker 5: I allowed it consciously. I was very conscious about allowing
Speaker 5: that process. And it's not an easy one because if
Speaker 5: people are not showing up the way you want them to, right,
Speaker 5: this usually will be a cause for me to be like, Okay,
Speaker 5: well I just won't deal with this. That's not the
Speaker 5: same thing as vibrating in alignment comes that's different. That's
Speaker 5: rejecting a person's behavior. What I've been intentional about is
Speaker 5: even allowing behaviors none that are disrespectful, because that's something different,
Speaker 5: you know, the name abuse, that's what I should say, abuse,
Speaker 5: No abuse, you know. But things that were not have
Speaker 5: not been ideal for what I typically would have gone for.
Speaker 4: I had to.
Speaker 5: I've allowed myself to experience them and being choiceless in
Speaker 5: how I move come on choicely and even though I
Speaker 5: tried to make choices. I still went back with the
Speaker 5: soul's lesson and it's it's given me some really great lessons.
Speaker 3: I love it. I love it. Ladies and gentlemen, you're
Speaker 3: listening to the voice of reason wholeness Wednesday, Precious Migil,
Speaker 3: she's on the grill. Listen if you want to talk
Speaker 3: to her. All you gotta do is call us at
Speaker 3: one eight hundred and nine twenty fifteen eighty when we
Speaker 3: come back from the other side. As we move forward,
Speaker 3: we're gonna go to Denver, Colorado.
Speaker 16: Okay, good morning. This today is Lenoida fourteenth, the year
Speaker 16: two thousand and fourth. Yeah. In the Dear Park Monastery
Speaker 16: during our winter retreat last week, we learn they gota
Speaker 16: I have it.
Speaker 1: I I am home.
Speaker 16: In the here, in the now, I am solid, I
Speaker 16: am free in the ultimate.
Speaker 3: I grow.
Speaker 16: And this attack can be used for sitting meditation, can
Speaker 16: be used for walking meditation. When you stand, you can
Speaker 16: also practice I have r I'm home. And when you
Speaker 16: lie down you can also practice I have a right,
Speaker 16: I'm home. At the end of the day, you like
Speaker 16: to to to rest.
Speaker 5: That was your favorite Yes, chicken out hand, mindfulness, the
Speaker 5: practice of being present, yes, absolutely.
Speaker 3: And that's one of our far Eastern brothers, and a
Speaker 3: lot of modern day psychology is starting to pull from
Speaker 3: this mindfulness concept. But he sounded like an Asian version
Speaker 3: of a seventies soul record. The way he was talking,
Speaker 3: it was like get ready baby.
Speaker 4: I love the way he.
Speaker 3: Had a smooth, little approach to him. I loved it.
Speaker 4: Yes, yes, but he was right on point, right on
Speaker 4: the money.
Speaker 3: In order to get into flow state, there must be
Speaker 3: a state of mindfulness. Yes, and mindfulness is just another
Speaker 3: term for awareness. But that awareness can't be called awareness
Speaker 3: if evaluation or judgment is a part of it.
Speaker 4: Correct, It's about being.
Speaker 3: A lot of people don't know how to flow, yeah,
Speaker 3: but they know how to go. Yeah.
Speaker 4: Like how he said, when you stand up, you have
Speaker 4: arrived home. That's where you are. That is your home.
Speaker 3: Yes, well we got callers, let's get him in here,
Speaker 3: do it. I want to apologize for Cali's soul. She
Speaker 3: should have been on a segment ago, but we get
Speaker 3: caught up. Cali sold Denver, Colorado, get in here. What
Speaker 3: are your thoughts on tonight's topic?
Speaker 17: First of all, shout out to stick my han.
Speaker 3: Yes, y'all like him?
Speaker 17: Oh Man Ti is he's amazing. When I first started
Speaker 17: my meditation practicing, I could not sit still to save
Speaker 17: my life. It was he was like the first person
Speaker 17: that taught me about the concept of like anything that
Speaker 17: I do can be a meditation. I can talk walking ooh,
Speaker 17: girls like oh okay, and now I actually can't sit
Speaker 17: still on the christ Yeah, but y'all topic today is
Speaker 17: on points so much and I am a recovering control freak.
Speaker 7: Wh yes, so thet the difference between vetting and letting, Like,
Speaker 7: that's a concept that I have.
Speaker 17: Those are concepts that I have looked at like the
Speaker 17: past three to four years in my life, and I oh,
Speaker 17: I was a serial vetter and it causes a lot
Speaker 17: of grief because you got this checklist, and if they
Speaker 17: don't put in a checklist, you're like, Okay, let me
Speaker 17: move around a little bit. Whereas the concept of letting
Speaker 17: has bought for so many like holy encounters in my life. Indeed,
Speaker 17: so much freedom, so much peace, And I love that
Speaker 17: y'all like to remind us that anytime we're experiencing conflict
Speaker 17: in our mind, to check in with our body and
Speaker 17: see where is it in your body?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 17: And I noticed with this activity of letting and slow,
Speaker 17: Like my shoulders just in my general life have dropped.
Speaker 17: I think my shoulders I must have carried them up
Speaker 17: by my ears before. So yeah, letting it really is
Speaker 17: a beautiful thing. And I would invite people out there
Speaker 17: if you haven't tried to move in that space of
Speaker 17: just letting life slow, just try it, because it really
Speaker 17: does feel different that there's no answer to it if
Speaker 17: you're doing it properly, and if you're starting the feeling,
Speaker 17: that's that control and that betting, like tapping you on
Speaker 17: the shoulder, like you know, we shouldn't just be chilling
Speaker 17: like this, we should we should pull out our checklist.
Speaker 4: Yeah, see check home. Yeah see see you said.
Speaker 3: It, love it, love it, Cali Soul. Guess what you
Speaker 3: just did? Sweethell right?
Speaker 17: Brought them into the house.
Speaker 3: He Denver. Yes, if you want to bring your city
Speaker 3: in a building, fifteen eighty Denver, Colorado in the building.
Speaker 3: We got another caller on the line. Let's get her
Speaker 3: in here. Alexis from Long Beach, California, LBC. You already
Speaker 3: know what's gonna go down. What are your thoughts on
Speaker 3: tonight's topic?
Speaker 18: Hey, family, Hey, hey, hey, I think tonight's topic is great.
Speaker 18: I also think it's relatable. I have a question, yes,
Speaker 18: to know at what point do you say? Okay? I
Speaker 18: don't judge. I'm not a control freak, but I don't
Speaker 18: wish to participate. Is there a way to properly identify
Speaker 18: your wounds through the lens the mirror that your partner
Speaker 18: is holding up to you step back from the commitment
Speaker 18: and do your homework on your own isolation. Is there
Speaker 18: a way to heal and go on a solo individual
Speaker 18: journey while physically departing from connection as a whole without
Speaker 18: it being considered like running away or being considered an
Speaker 18: avoiding If that makes sense.
Speaker 4: So to be.
Speaker 3: Okay, okay? She asked a heavy question. Yeah, we gotta
Speaker 3: let her still in't it? We're gonna answer it. On
Speaker 3: the other side, ladies and gentlemen, Alexis is trying to start. Man.
Speaker 19: It was the dead of winter in Saint Louis and
Speaker 19: I was completing my fellowship in psychology when I had
Speaker 19: purchased my first brand new car on nineteen eighty seven,
Speaker 19: Toyota Celica. I was so excited to be able to
Speaker 19: afford my first new car, this white, shiny sports car.
Speaker 3: It was my prize possession in the middle of the night. Yeah,
Speaker 3: I know he's gonna cook, but I've got callers and
Speaker 3: I don't have time for his Toyota Selica story. Who
Speaker 3: was that, Indy? I'm sorry, Tony Ferreddy. We'll holler back
Speaker 3: at you tomorrow because guess who's coming on tomorrow?
Speaker 4: Who?
Speaker 3: Doctor Alan Berger? Oh?
Speaker 4: Yes, okay, our author.
Speaker 3: Of Emotional Sobriety will be in studio.
Speaker 4: I wanted to catch that.
Speaker 3: It's about to be lit. Just get back to Alexis
Speaker 3: down in an LBC.
Speaker 4: Yes, Alexis, you're there.
Speaker 18: Yes, I am.
Speaker 3: Now just tell me that question again because it was
Speaker 3: quite profound and I want Precious to address it.
Speaker 18: Yeah. So the question is this, when you're in connection
Speaker 18: and your partner is doing what they're supposed to do,
Speaker 18: they trigger you, right, they have their invisible Europe and
Speaker 18: they're showing you your wounds. Is it possible that rather
Speaker 18: than continuing to participate in the connection, that you can
Speaker 18: actually pivot and separate and still do that same healing
Speaker 18: in isolation mode. So you have to participate.
Speaker 5: So the answer is yes, you can. And if you
Speaker 5: want to look at this from an awakened elevated awakened state.
Speaker 4: You don't have to make any choices.
Speaker 5: You can recognize that the way they're showing up is
Speaker 5: triggering you, and then you can focus on that work.
Speaker 5: Stay focused on the spirit. It's you don't ever have
Speaker 5: to leave anyone. You can just keep vibrating, focused on
Speaker 5: the spirit. It will take you where you need to go.
Speaker 5: They may do you a favor and leave you no
Speaker 5: take sometimes Now, well, I mean you could look at
Speaker 5: it that way, but this concept of working on like
Speaker 5: for example, you know me, well, I left my last marriage, right,
Speaker 5: if I would have been in a higher state of consciousness,
Speaker 5: I would not have left. I would have just stayed
Speaker 5: focused on the spirit and allow things to go as
Speaker 5: they may, participating in the things that I feel called to.
Speaker 5: This whole leaving does not have to happen. People will
Speaker 5: go where they need to go. Right, stay focused on
Speaker 5: the spirit.
Speaker 3: But I would ask the question I have a question
Speaker 3: for you, alexis why why would you want to leave?
Speaker 3: If it wasn't like abusive, but it was triggering. So
Speaker 3: we take abuse off the table. If abuses on the table,
Speaker 3: get the hell out of there. Don't ask questions. Now
Speaker 3: there's no abuse but yet you still want to leave
Speaker 3: because you're triggered. Why why do you want to leave.
Speaker 18: I'm at the point in my life now where connections
Speaker 18: are becoming less and less romantic and more about the
Speaker 18: spiritual aspect. I'm looking at it less about romanticism, and
Speaker 18: I'm seeing people as spiritual lessons. Yeah, so when you
Speaker 18: look at an connection as more of not to make
Speaker 18: it sound like that, but like an assignment. Right, that
Speaker 18: person is my teacher, really, whether they know it or not.
Speaker 18: Sometimes they're teaching me through really positive experiences, and sometimes
Speaker 18: they're teaching me through very negative experiences. And a lot
Speaker 18: of times they're not aware of this, but I know
Speaker 18: what it is. You know what I mean. So that person,
Speaker 18: that's their contract. This is a contractual agreement. And once
Speaker 18: they've served their purpose, they're now a catalyst. And they
Speaker 18: served their purpose and now it's up to me to
Speaker 18: do what I need to do. So it's about me
Speaker 18: and what I'm supposed to be doing and less about them.
Speaker 18: So when you think about it that way, it's less
Speaker 18: about what I need to do with you and me
Speaker 18: smiling in your face and being around you, and it's
Speaker 18: about me and how I need to work through this
Speaker 18: energy and how I need to heal the things that
Speaker 18: you brought up and stirred up within me. That's really
Speaker 18: where I'm not with this, So just why It's not
Speaker 18: about a fight or flight type of feelings for me
Speaker 18: right now. It's more so about, oh my God, thank
Speaker 18: you for showing me what I need to work on.
Speaker 18: Let me go do that.
Speaker 4: So just do the work better the.
Speaker 18: Next time I show up, you know what I mean?
Speaker 5: Yeah, do the work and don't You don't have to
Speaker 5: be in secret about it, be honest about how you're
Speaker 5: showing up. Yeah, I'm not feeling that I'm going to
Speaker 5: do this and I eventually am moving in this way.
Speaker 5: Just stay focused on the other thing, because like, if
Speaker 5: it's safe, it's someone that you're in relationship and then
Speaker 5: they start cheating, right, I'm gonna break up.
Speaker 4: I'm gonna leave you.
Speaker 5: Yeah, before you start focusing on that, focus on yourself.
Speaker 5: What is this bringing up for you? What is it
Speaker 5: that God is saying to you? What does God have
Speaker 5: for you that will journey you to where you need
Speaker 5: to go. Now, if there's a marriage here, of course
Speaker 5: there are certain steps that need to be taken.
Speaker 4: But fighting and all this exercises and futility.
Speaker 5: Stay focused on the spirit right and if you're not
Speaker 5: in a committed relationship with someone, you really don't have a.
Speaker 4: Big speech that you need to make. Just stay focused.
Speaker 3: You know, you know you don't have to do a speech.
Speaker 3: Is crazy? I love it, It's true.
Speaker 4: But they still want to hear from you.
Speaker 18: That's the problem that that really is. Yeah, it's easy
Speaker 18: for me to disconnect, it's not so easy for them.
Speaker 18: And then, you know, when you got the good energy,
Speaker 18: it's not.
Speaker 5: You know, but the spirit, you turn it over to
Speaker 5: their Yeah.
Speaker 3: Alexis, guess what you just did, sweetheart.
Speaker 18: Baby, I done brought long beats all up and through there.
Speaker 3: In the building. I love it. I love it, I
Speaker 3: love it.
Speaker 4: Today was fun.
Speaker 3: Today was great. You have you lifted my spirits.
Speaker 4: To a I love you brother, Yes, yes, this was I.
Speaker 3: Love you too, sister, Thank you. This was powerful. Precious,
Speaker 3: I need folk to go see you. How do they
Speaker 3: come see you? How do they pull up?
Speaker 5: Well, you just go to with precious dot com. And
Speaker 5: I know it's working because your listeners aren't calling me.
Speaker 5: With Precious dot com, you can even schedule yourself or
Speaker 5: submit an inquiry for an appointment, or you can go
Speaker 5: to at Phenomenal Change, at Phenomenal Underscore Change on ig
Speaker 5: and if you go to Facebook, I'm just phenomenal chain.
Speaker 3: I love it, I love it. Please go to with
Speaker 3: Precious dot com. I have some questions. If embodiment never
Speaker 3: ask permission from your past, right, why does your past
Speaker 3: continue demanding permission from your future? God, if every tomorrow
Speaker 3: must first receive approval from yesterday, at what point did
Speaker 3: memory quietly become your highest authority instead of reality. Suppose
Speaker 3: your greatest relationship fear has never been abandonment. Suppose it
Speaker 3: has always been the death of the identity abandonment created.
Speaker 3: Which loss are you actually protecting? So you think you're discerning,
Speaker 3: you think you're vetting. But if you haven't, and I
Speaker 3: always say this, won some internal self wars, cast out
Speaker 3: your own demons, performed a self exorcism. You're going to
Speaker 3: be in a state of some kind of dependence. You're
Speaker 3: going to be depending on them to make you happy,
Speaker 3: on them to make you feel like you're worth it.
Speaker 3: I'm telling you, if listen, we start the conversations.
Speaker 4: It's up to you to finish the.
Speaker 3: Voice of reason and Precious in another holeness with stay
Speaker 3: with Fireworks. I'll be back tomorrow with another slapper. I
Speaker 3: love y'all, See you tomorrow, Dudeeez