Speaker 1: New edition.
Speaker 2: Since Elmer has been with his girlfriend Diane for three months,
Speaker 2: what of parents will they be? Go, Elmer, how many
Speaker 2: kids have you talked about having together?
Speaker 3: Oh?
Speaker 4: My god?
Speaker 5: If he has an answer to this though, Elmer and
Speaker 5: I are like, we should be brothers. Yeah, if he
Speaker 5: genuinely three months in knows how many kids the two
Speaker 5: of them would like to have.
Speaker 3: Okay, Elmer, Florias yours? Has it come up yet?
Speaker 6: Uh no, But we have talked about, like what kids
Speaker 6: would look like if you know what I mean, mixed
Speaker 6: race couple.
Speaker 3: Oh oh, well, that's the same thing. That's pretty good.
Speaker 3: Three months in race couple.
Speaker 1: Kids are always the cutest.
Speaker 3: Quantity you haven't talked about.
Speaker 7: I mean you talked about quality quantity, and I think
Speaker 7: that's that's the Actually.
Speaker 1: Are we talking two or five?
Speaker 3: You think, how many would you, like, Elmer if you
Speaker 3: had your brothers?
Speaker 4: Well, it depends how much money are making.
Speaker 1: Good point.
Speaker 5: That's a smart They're not that expensive early on. They
Speaker 5: get expensive when they're like teenagers.
Speaker 4: Yeah, let's see maybe two, maybe adopt one?
Speaker 3: Oh so you go three?
Speaker 5: Or one of those two would be about I don't know,
Speaker 5: maybe like one and done. This seems to be a
Speaker 5: growing trend in younger folks. With all due respect him, right,
Speaker 5: you're obviously yeah, adoption, the adoption thing, like people like
Speaker 5: they grow up saying that they want to have maybe
Speaker 5: one of their own, but they definitely want to adopt
Speaker 5: another one.
Speaker 1: Is that because why is that? Elmer? Why would you
Speaker 1: like to adopt one?
Speaker 6: I don't know, It's just been like since I was
Speaker 6: a kid, I've always been like, there's a lot of
Speaker 6: kids out there, you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, isn't that.
Speaker 5: But the reason why I think this is interesting is
Speaker 5: this is like almost like a cultural hive mind thing
Speaker 5: that is within a generation. And I mean, I'm sure
Speaker 5: an economists could dig into what is the psychological inspiration
Speaker 5: behind it. But yeah, I hear it constantly from people
Speaker 5: who don't have kids yet that there are more and
Speaker 5: more people are.
Speaker 3: Talking about adopting.
Speaker 5: It's interesting where it used to be like a joke
Speaker 5: when we were kids, you know what I mean, Like
Speaker 5: like that was supposed to be a negative thing, but
Speaker 5: now people are like, no, this is what everybody.
Speaker 3: Should be doing.
Speaker 2: If you're wondering why Gary's face looks like that, it's
Speaker 2: because he is a pure bred family. He doesn't believe
Speaker 2: in any sort of crossing of any.
Speaker 5: Lines at Gary, why would you bring this up at
Speaker 5: this time?
Speaker 3: I don't know why.
Speaker 1: Well, I mean, if we're going to talk about dogs.
Speaker 3: I see what you're doing.
Speaker 7: I'm just saying, yes, I don't have any.
Speaker 3: That one must have really landed. Good job. We were
Speaker 3: all here.
Speaker 1: To see the downfall of this.
Speaker 3: I was going to say.
Speaker 7: I was going to say I have adopted people in
Speaker 7: my family. I mean, my brother in law was adopted.
Speaker 7: But wait, doesn't count. And I'm trying to think of.
Speaker 1: It's okay, that's all right.
Speaker 4: I think it's humans.
Speaker 6: You know, we should be more communal and this should
Speaker 6: be like more talking.
Speaker 4: Yeah, we should take care of like the kids that
Speaker 4: don't have like parents.
Speaker 6: That's very nice, protect each other and like, yeah, it's
Speaker 6: cool to have your own kids. But imagine if everyone
Speaker 6: one just like adopted and like to just be like
Speaker 6: less sad kids in the world.
Speaker 3: You know, as an adopted person, I would rather have
Speaker 3: my own than adopt me.
Speaker 2: Too, don't I don't want that surprise box as an
Speaker 2: adopted kid, I wouldn't want me. I wouldn't want to
Speaker 2: open that up and be like, oh great, I've got
Speaker 2: this for most of my life.
Speaker 3: One of the.
Speaker 5: Things that I brought in to talk about I think
Speaker 5: kind of addresses this thing. I'm not trying to shorn
Speaker 5: this in at all. I'm sorry if I'm ruining him
Speaker 5: per segment, but no, it's that the idea that I
Speaker 5: found this article that they did another study that basically
Speaker 5: corroborated with this new belief that more of what people
Speaker 5: are is genetic than it is there's more nature than
Speaker 5: there is nurture. That and it's not trying to discount
Speaker 5: a nurture situation at all, where your environment and all
Speaker 5: that stuff does have an impact on you, but kind
Speaker 5: of there's this concept that's growing that there's at your core,
Speaker 5: your genetics decide who you are and what's going to
Speaker 5: happen to you. I don't believe that, no.
Speaker 1: Because I know both sides.
Speaker 2: I know my parents, and I know my biological mother,
Speaker 2: and I am just like my mother my mother. I've
Speaker 2: met my biological mother. I have a lot of similarities
Speaker 2: with her, but she seems much more normal.
Speaker 5: So even like personality and things like that, because I
Speaker 5: think there's a tendency to be like I am.
Speaker 2: I am very much into the I've learned, at least
Speaker 2: from the small sample of information I have for my
Speaker 2: own situation, that it's much more nurture over nature.
Speaker 3: Fascinating. Well, I guess we're done. Then I guess yeah, but.
Speaker 2: I guess it's I mean, it's it's gonna be different.
Speaker 2: I mean, like there's a study for everything to say.
Speaker 8: You know.
Speaker 1: It can all you know, come on, well and you can't.
Speaker 3: This goes to what you say. I'm easily persuaded that there's.
Speaker 1: A study for that.
Speaker 3: Your kids are younger than my kids. I think I
Speaker 3: have a better.
Speaker 7: I'm closer to a conclusion than you would be because
Speaker 7: I have a better idea of what their adult personality.
Speaker 3: We're like sixty eight years ahead of.
Speaker 5: Me, I think, if I remember it correct, sixty eight
Speaker 5: years six six eight years.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I thought you're making a Shannon now old I am.
Speaker 3: You've got him on the ropes from your earlier Yeah,
Speaker 3: you're that dog.
Speaker 2: That's pretty good right now, he's laughing inside.
Speaker 3: Somewhere somebody face.
Speaker 7: But the idea that the genetics, I mean, we raised
Speaker 7: our kids in the same house at the same time,
Speaker 7: like they were there, they're not that far apart. In
Speaker 7: age two years, two two and a half years. So
Speaker 7: the idea that they can come out and be very
Speaker 7: different people.
Speaker 2: Yeah, my brother and I are very different, both adopted,
Speaker 2: separate adoptive fam separate families, you know, and we are
Speaker 2: very different like your kids.
Speaker 1: My brother and I are kids, are.
Speaker 3: Two different people in my po exactly.
Speaker 5: There's but again, to me, there's the core of who
Speaker 5: they are, right. They still they're very different, and they're
Speaker 5: better people than I am. But at the core they
Speaker 5: still have my softness, my sappiness.
Speaker 2: There's innate's stuff in your personality that is genetics.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but then.
Speaker 2: There's the stuff that shapes who you are, and I
Speaker 2: think that that stuff is more prominent than the innate stuff.
Speaker 1: And my brother is really good.
Speaker 2: When it comes to fixing cars, just like his biological
Speaker 2: family was.
Speaker 1: On both sides. My family can't fix a car.
Speaker 2: My dad couldn't fix anything, but he has that innate gift.
Speaker 2: But his entire personality is the family personality like you.
Speaker 3: Know, as well it should be.
Speaker 5: I mean, there also could be argued that, you know,
Speaker 5: our brains are kind of wired to find these connections
Speaker 5: and to solve the things that don't make sense, and
Speaker 5: so we're going to see things the way that we
Speaker 5: want to.
Speaker 7: See that totally. And then how much how much would
Speaker 7: your genetics? Are your genetics malleable? Can can they change
Speaker 7: from generation to generation? Where As you know, Shannon's brother's
Speaker 7: great at fixing cars but has a very unique personality.
Speaker 7: Does his kid do his kids do they have his
Speaker 7: personality because his genes changed? I mean, I don't know,
Speaker 7: that'd be much more of a different scientific question. Interesting
Speaker 7: if I think, if I think I was going to
Speaker 7: try to oversimplify what this study was saying, is that
Speaker 7: I think it's like they're trying to argue that it's
Speaker 7: a sixty forty split and that your environment has maybe
Speaker 7: a forty percent or less influence on who you are
Speaker 7: at your core being. Like I would almost argue that
Speaker 7: if you had not had a positive experience with your
Speaker 7: adopted family, that you would probably have a differing perspective
Speaker 7: as well, Like you would probably look at it and
Speaker 7: not want to see the similarities.
Speaker 1: You're assuming I had a positive experience.
Speaker 8: Well based, Okay, she is very good at this rock
Speaker 8: will continue justin because I feel.
Speaker 3: Like I do see how it hurts hurts.
Speaker 4: A break.
Speaker 3: I'm gonna take a gene an emotional neroic.
Speaker 5: He was like, he got in this oyster knife was like,
Speaker 5: let me see your I do think it was better
Speaker 5: that you were able to get some of it out.
Speaker 7: I agree, yeah, Gary and Shannon kf I live everywhere.
Speaker 1: That's exactly what I thought.
Speaker 2: I was like, I'm freaking justin right now, and I
Speaker 2: don't like it.
Speaker 3: It's not bad. I mean, you get premature gray, but
Speaker 3: in that life.
Speaker 4: Is pretty good.
Speaker 3: But you stood up. There's a you were very physical.
Speaker 1: You're very like, okay, well, let's not talk about it.
Speaker 3: He just goes into himself like shoulders cry over.
Speaker 1: You know, I crumpled a piece of paper.
Speaker 5: It's not that bad. I mean depends what's the backstory
Speaker 5: of the pride?
Speaker 3: What's the paper? Where's what's the journey?
Speaker 1: What's its journey?
Speaker 7: We humans are very closely related to to chimpanzees and
Speaker 7: apes and.
Speaker 3: Large large apes yep.
Speaker 7: And there's a study that suggests that as different as
Speaker 7: our parenting styles can be among humans, there are different
Speaker 7: parenting styles among the great apes.
Speaker 5: So they decided to look at sumatran orangutangs because Iratans
Speaker 5: the Sumatra ones are definitely the top notch and because
Speaker 5: of any mammal, let me get non human animal, they
Speaker 5: care for their children longer than anybody else and it's
Speaker 5: six to nine years. So it's still like I think
Speaker 5: I was going to say half, but probably a quarter
Speaker 5: for our kids nowadays, depending on what you evolved. And
Speaker 5: so they were looking at and what they found was
Speaker 5: that there was there was consistent differences between the different
Speaker 5: mothers that they like observed over six thousand hours of
Speaker 5: orangutan's mothering their young and anyway, they also found that
Speaker 5: what made them feel like this was something that was
Speaker 5: a personality trait of the mom was that it would
Speaker 5: be consistent through multiple children, like they had their way
Speaker 5: of doing it, and there was like variations between how
Speaker 5: long they would carry them and how long they would
Speaker 5: help them with food, and how long they wanted them
Speaker 5: to be close to them as they got older. So
Speaker 5: there's various points within their development that a mom would
Speaker 5: be like, Okay, n it's time for you to go
Speaker 5: away from me and go figure it out.
Speaker 7: Well, and let me ask if there's a connection here.
Speaker 7: Because we just talked about the idea that genetics shape personality.
Speaker 7: The genetics are the things that will control these things.
Speaker 7: So is this a suggestion perhaps or do you conclude
Speaker 7: from that, Yeah, genetics will determine what kind of a
Speaker 7: parent you're going to be.
Speaker 5: I think so, I think depending on what you believe,
Speaker 5: I mean, I think if you're more leaning science than
Speaker 5: I think, this could be an argument that this is
Speaker 5: how parenting evolves, like and people evolve that right now.
Speaker 5: I mean, there's a strong movement evolutionarily for parenting to
Speaker 5: be like very involved in what your kids are doing
Speaker 5: well into adulthood. And I think that probably much like
Speaker 5: we talk a lot about homework, how it swings on
Speaker 5: a pendulum, like they go from no now we get
Speaker 5: get caught up on homework.
Speaker 1: Of how you guys parent and your wife's parent.
Speaker 2: Is is the way that they were parented or you
Speaker 2: were parented.
Speaker 5: I think it's always informed, but I like so for me,
Speaker 5: I copied a lot about what I got from my dad,
Speaker 5: but then there was this part that I got from
Speaker 5: my mom that was very soft and loving, right, And
Speaker 5: so I've even though Natalie still handles that my wife,
Speaker 5: I feel like there's a lot I've softened. I'm a
Speaker 5: lot softer than my dad is in so many ways.
Speaker 1: But you always have been.
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, I mean, but it's interesting too because as
Speaker 5: he got.
Speaker 3: Older and I've I'm experienced. I don't know if you would.
Speaker 5: Agree, Gary. We talked about this the three sevens. Right,
Speaker 5: zero to seven you play with your kids, and then
Speaker 5: seven to fourteen guide you teach them, and then fourteen
Speaker 5: to twenty one. It's kind of like you you're more
Speaker 5: of a coach. I'm sorry, you teach them from seven
Speaker 5: to fourteen, and you coach them from fourteen to twenty one,
Speaker 5: and that I feel like as I got older, I
Speaker 5: could see my dad also softening and like it felt
Speaker 5: more peer like. There was always the respect that he
Speaker 5: was my dad, but it was just it was a
Speaker 5: different relationship that became more friendly. And I see that
Speaker 5: start to happening happen with my kids right now, that
Speaker 5: there's this change that even happens throughout time.
Speaker 7: My parents were very hands off for the most part,
Speaker 7: not that they didn't care, but Dad, for example, it
Speaker 7: was just very He's just very hands off. He didn't
Speaker 7: know the names of my friends or he didn't know
Speaker 7: I'm pretty sure he knew where my school was, but
Speaker 7: if he was tasked with ever picking me up from school,
Speaker 7: it would be an adventure for him to get there,
Speaker 7: and I I, I don't know if I tried to
Speaker 7: or I just kind of fell into that pattern with
Speaker 7: my kids. I was much more involved with them than
Speaker 7: my dad was with my childhood, but not in a negative.
Speaker 7: I don't look back and I think you were doing
Speaker 7: that because your dad wasn't there, right or was it?
Speaker 3: I don't know. I mean, I will say this my trend.
Speaker 7: If it were not for my wife encouraging me to
Speaker 7: be involved with stuff, I wouldn't have been involved with something. Yeah,
Speaker 7: Like I was encouraged like, hey, why don't you coach
Speaker 7: a volunteer to coach the baseball team or the soccer
Speaker 7: team or something like that, because then you get to
Speaker 7: hang out with your kids.
Speaker 3: And I'm like, yeah, but there's other kids.
Speaker 7: There's other kids there too, and other parents, parents and adults,
Speaker 7: and like, I don't I like my kids, but there's
Speaker 7: a lot that goes with that. But it was, you know,
Speaker 7: and it kind of was the decision of well, if
Speaker 7: they see me involved and if they remember me being involved,
Speaker 7: maybe there is a benefit to that that goes beyond
Speaker 7: what a benefit I received from my own parents.
Speaker 5: My thing, my dad did a version of this, but
Speaker 5: not as not to the level that I think I've done.
Speaker 5: Is that my thing was I wanted to be so
Speaker 5: involved that the people that were watching over my kids
Speaker 5: would know that I'm involved, and therefore they would pay
Speaker 5: more attention to my kids. And it worked, like when
Speaker 5: they were in elementary school, I would get yard duties
Speaker 5: that would come up to and be like, hey, your
Speaker 5: son has eating lunch in the past couple of days,
Speaker 5: Like they would be aware of that kind of stuff.
Speaker 5: I think when they see that investment, it makes sense.
Speaker 5: But the thing that also blew my mind about the
Speaker 5: Rangutans is that there was one kind of thing that
Speaker 5: they saw as a parental trend where the mothers that
Speaker 5: carried their kids longer, those kids would develop the ability
Speaker 5: to eat on their own sooner and be more independent
Speaker 5: as they got older.
Speaker 1: Your kids don't even need lunch now.
Speaker 3: Is right? I don't even feed them right? Not too
Speaker 3: far off for themselves now it's the bark out in
Speaker 3: the backyard, the the day. Listen, everybody has to grow
Speaker 3: up their own way.
Speaker 7: Gar's good fids, just thank you.
Speaker 3: Justin Worsham of course is a great person.
Speaker 1: He is a great person.
Speaker 3: I'm still here. This is great for me. Oh, I
Speaker 3: didn't realize.
Speaker 2: That we can do more. Stick around for the next hour.
Speaker 2: We'll make it all about you.
Speaker 3: Early birthday for me.
Speaker 7: Guys,