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Speaker 1: Hey, the LA Talk fifteen eighty Yeah, we got jokes.

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We said. Our topic this morning is celibacy. So much

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to talk about this hour, and a lot of people

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are making the choice. And then on the other end

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of the spectrum, there's a group called in cells, which

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literally means involuntary celibate. We're being joined this morning by

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an American stand up comic. She's from New Orleans, USA.

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She's an actor, a singer, a writer, a host, and

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an entrepreneur. She's also a matchmaker now in her latest incarnation,

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Del Harrison. Welcome down and me.

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Speaker 2: Thank you so much for having me with in cells.

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Involuntarily cells. So ain't nobody getting with them? I mean

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I need more more information.

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Speaker 1: Oh okay, you're not up on the in cell movement.

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In cells there's a lot of young men, mostly young men.

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I think they're maybe some women, but in cell refers

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to the there's a group of young men, mostly online

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that are involuntarily celibate, and they're angry because they feel

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many of them I'm paraphrasing, but this is pretty much

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how they are seen as people angry at women because

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they feel that women owe them uh sex, love, companionship,

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and they're not getting it. So some of them are

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pretty and pretty misogynistic if you will.

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Speaker 2: Well, they got to turn off the rap music first

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of all, okay, because a lot of that is is TTR.

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How to just want somebody for one thing and now

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you mad with me because you know, and and then

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happy First of all, that group that's not just young

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men too, I mean means some old men out here

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involuntarily celibate too.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, well, you know right exactly. They call it. Well,

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this is from CNN, they say. The Anti Defamation League,

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which works to address hate and extremism, defines in cells

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as heterosexual men who blame women in society for their

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lack of romantic success. They're described as being largely misogynistic,

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self pitying, and they are considered dangerous according to the

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Anti Defamation League because of their anti woman views.

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Speaker 2: And that's what I'm talking about, guys. Hi, y'all anti women.

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But then y'all need to lay down with us at

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the same time. And you know what, a lot of

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men be like that too, like they hate us. They

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in the comments talk about y'all l this. Y'all need

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to put some clothes on. Y'all just in that, but

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then at the same time you still want to be

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hell by us, and brother, you can't have it both ways.

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You can't be out here mad with your mama deflecting

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on me, and then I'm supposed to go over here

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and lay down with you, you know, And then the other

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half of y'all want to take people on days three

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times for thirty dollars, and then I need to go

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back home. What you do or you mad? Like who

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taught y'all how to court? That's really the bottom line.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I don't know how many black men are

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part of the insult culture. It's generally more like associated

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with Miles. You say, yes, there are black men. I

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think it's generally more associated with white yeah, heterosexual men.

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But I do see what you're talking about in the manisphere.

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I made the mistake one day because I saw someone

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that I know that I thought was a friend talking

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on the man and it turned out to be a

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manisphere chat where they were just spending the whole time

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disparaging black women for wearing weaves and makeup when we

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should be working on our inner beauty and our natural

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our natural beauty or whatever. And I said, why are

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you policing women's hair and makeup, and then I you know,

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they started attacking me. You know, well you're divorced, so

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you're a failure and you know all this stuff. So

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so that anti time. Yeah, that's right. So what I'm

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getting at is that anti woman culture that you're talking about,

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even though in cells aren't generally black, that anti woman,

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that misogynist sort of undertone does exist in the black

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online spaces. I think among men more in the manisphere

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kind of energy.

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Speaker 2: Well, I don't even know any Like when you first

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said in cells, I thought of three hundred thousand black

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men i'd have met.

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Speaker 1: Part so they don't know it.

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Speaker 2: I mean, no, they don't know it. They haven't now,

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but they didn't created the whole group, like because I

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just met a man. I just went on one of

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these like group runs one of these days. I met

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a fifty five year old black man and we're just,

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you know, just talking to him about like, you know,

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every man wants a good woman, right, And he was like,

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I'm fifty five, what would I want a good woman for?

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I got five different women. Well I was like, well,

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I was like brother, you know, immediately I thought he

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was like one of these like high functional autistic man.

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Because I'm like, every man wants a good woman buy him.

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He was like, well, I got five. I got a

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woman for this, I got a woman for that. But

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I was like, brother, you're not sleeping with all five

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of that. I mean what I want? What I want

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to leave? So that man is involuntary. He's been involuntarily

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celibate so long. This man can't think straight. He can't wait.

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Speaker 1: Wait a minute, if he's got five different men, how

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is I mean women? How is he celibate?

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Speaker 2: He because ain't nobody sleeping with no woman and sleeping

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with that retarded mindset? You know what I'm saying, Like

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this man, I mean I wish.

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Speaker 1: They might be, but they might be. I mean there

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are there there are people that have a scarcity mentality

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that think that there aren't enough men, or people that

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think there aren't enough women, or that you know that

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they they might he might Is he rich?

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Speaker 2: No?

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Speaker 1: No?

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Speaker 2: He mean is he hots? No? I'm talking about the

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rig hot or brilliant. Look he had to he had to,

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you know, got out of high school, started working at

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the trash truck company, got demoted from driving back to Janada.

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You know, what I'm saying and been out here with

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the chemicals method of his brain ever fits like he

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had you. Okay, yeah, I'm sorry, you know, because the

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thing is even my dog she started, or.

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Speaker 1: Oh no, she started, she called it what it was.

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I got this. I know you got some cleanup to

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do right now, so I got well, I'll check back

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and would you after you do that. But I mean, look,

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here's the thing. We started talking about celibacy today. We said,

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you know, is it a punishment or is it? Is

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it a choice? Uh? And I think that when we

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talk about in cells, the Fahimas and the chat saying

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they're all white and male. There's also the minis for

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that has a Netflix movies that includes black man like

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Myron Gains. But I mean, and I know that this

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is a whole subculture. And I've also observed a lot

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of women, especially on Instagram, talking about what you're saying, Dell,

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which is that men want to have sex with us.

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You said you want them to hold us. I don't

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think it's really just whole. I think they want to

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have sex with women, but they want to spend all

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their time with men. They don't really like women. I

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don't know if this is a new phenomena or not.

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But the other side of that coin is more and

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more women and men, some men, but more and more

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women are choosing celibacy as a dating choice, and I

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would think that's the other side of the coin. We

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will look at all of that when we come forward.

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You're invited in if you've got something to say about it.

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Eight hundred nine twoh fifteen eighty, eight hundred and nine

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two fifteen eighty. I know that Dell Harrison has something

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to say about something she gets done dealing with that DS.

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It's KBLA doc fifteen eighty and you're waking up with

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Dell Harrison and her pup Happy Monday. Yes, we're off

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to a great start. So, Dell, you're a high profile person.

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You're a singer, you're an actor, you're a comic, you

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do stand up tory, do all of these things. You

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do these mixers for black singles over forty What is

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your personal choice? Are you celibate? Are you considering celibacy?

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Do you think it's growing in popularity? How does this

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topic relate to you?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? I am celibates, you know, by choice, and it's

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because I feel like I want to be under the Covenant,

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and I do also feel like when you are a

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person that is on a mission, you know, like myself

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and a lot of people are. You know, when you

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have sex involved expectly quickly, then it's a distraction and

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it usually takes away from your purpose. And so as

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a Christian woman myself, I need to be able to

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hear from the Lord. That's why I'm just like, no,

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I'm gonna refrain at all times because you know, people

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and I feel like people get this confused. People like

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you know, I've talked to men and they feel like, oh,

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if you're celibate, you don't like sex. No, we like,

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say most most of the women I know we like

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sex even more than men like say, but we wanted

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with the right person. And a lot of times, you know,

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when you're when you're laying down too quickly as a

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lot of people want you to do, you know it's

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not the right person because sex, first of all, it

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clouds your visions, you know, and it claws up your hearing.

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People don't know that.

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Speaker 1: Huh, yeah, it claus up your hearing.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Well, okay, So if you're a spiritual person like me, Okay,

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you need to be able to hear. And when you

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introduce sey, if it's not with the right person, you're

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going to be introducing a lot of like distraction. You're

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introducing a spirit. And so now where you would have

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been sitting community hearing from the father, that is closed

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up because you know, the male doesn't just have uh

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you know, reproductive equipment. It's actually a wand it controls us.

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You know, whatever he's feeling, you're gonna be feeling. Whatever

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he's doing, he's gonna be doing. And it it's good.

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It's that's krystonite, you know.

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Speaker 1: So, wow, that's a lot. That's a lot.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Uh so you really think that is the magic stick?

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Speaker 2: Well, it's meant to be the magic stick, you know,

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that's the thing. Is is meant That's how the Lord

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built it. It's meant to be the magic stick. That's

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why you have to have the right burn, you know

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what I'm saying. That's how the LRD built it like that,

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and that's probably why people are so angry they don't

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have a magic stick, you know what I'm saying. So,

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y'all under the curve out here, and.

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Speaker 1: Oh now it's a current I'm saying, first it was

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a magic wand now it's a it's a item of.

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Speaker 2: No. No. Some people I have not been hurted. Some

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people have not received the magic wine, and so they're angry,

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you know what I'm saying. And with his angry too, well.

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Speaker 1: Yogi says celibacy is healthy. He says, I'm not an

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animal and I've never had a sexual disease. Protect your

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body and mind. Sex can kill you. Yeah, that's true.

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A lot of things can kill you. Cars can kill you.

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I mean, food can kill you. Alcohol can kill you.

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A lot of things can kill you if you don't

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handle with care. But Morris is also saying she's right

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about the power of sex. And look, I'm not judging

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you for your choice at all. I remember when I

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used to be on the Steve Harvey Morning Show and

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Shirley Strawberry went for a long period of celibacy because

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she was looking for a husband. And this, I know,

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the sort of born again virgin movement has gained a

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lot of traction, like a I don't know, maybe for

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the reasons you're saying. You know, they want to have clarity,

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or they want to erase their body, their body count

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and start over. I'm not sure, do you. Is it

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your impression that more and more people are making us choice.

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Speaker 2: I think more and more people are making a choice

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because once you get and the thing is, I know

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men that are opting into celibacy too. It's not and

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these are attractive men. It's not that they can't get anyone.

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But when you're on a mission, when you're on purpose,

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like purpose requires you to have a certain level of

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self control. And when you have that self control, then

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you understand the value of not just going over here

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and giving it up over here, you know, all these

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different places because now you know, the purpose gets distorted.

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So I feel like people are opting in for that

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reason alone. It's like they're trying to get you know,

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getting to They're not just getting to the bag. They

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in the bag, and they understand white companionship, you know

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when it comes to like sex, because everybody know Howney

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the devil will send you the exact type you're looking for.

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You like them tall, He got them tall, wait around

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the corner, you like them short man? Oh man? Was

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that short man five? So I think you gotta you know,

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you have to have a certain level of self control.

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Because you need to get to the right partnership and

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you know there's nothing like you know, chemistry, be burning

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like crazy for the wrong person.

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Speaker 1: So how do men react? Because I know you're not

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only have a dating sort of meet up and you've

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got a whole app for people to meet up, you

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do events, and I know that you yourself are looking

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for a life partner. How do they react when you say, oh,

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I'm celibate. Does that change your dating trajectory?

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Speaker 2: Well, it changes it myself period. But it does help

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to warrant because some people need to lay down, Like

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you know, when you may meet these men, whether you

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meet them online or you need honey, A lot of

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these men need a hug. Last week, you get what

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I'm saying, sir, I cannot be out here resolving life problems.

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Speaker 1: Okay.

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Speaker 2: You know from the last thirteen women that rejected you,

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you have to go back in and figure out why

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you're not getting any hugs. And that's what the INN tells.

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Need to figure out what is it about you in

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particular where you're not huggible to a woman. But the

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thing about it too with me, it helps me to

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ward all the people that may not be a real afraid,

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and I've had a person that has offered me, uh,

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you know, to come come get in his bed. Then

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I was like, oh no, I'm on a life mission.

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And then we actually got closer for me telling him

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that I'm celibate, I need to you know, we actually

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became friends. But guess what, what's honest with me? He

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was like, listen, you we we're just only going to

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be able to be friends, okay, because my girlfriend got

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some work to do. No problem, because I will let

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her do all the work until I determined that, you know,

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maybe maybe we will grow closer one day and and

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the work will shift over here. But no, you know,

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I was I respected, you know what I'm saying, and

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that's put the expectations right. So we're you know, we're

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we're still in contact, but you know that it's clear

278
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out there. It's clear that he needs to go over

279
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here and you know, and and get get the work done.

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So he says, and I need to be over here

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with my promise.

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Speaker 1: With your promise. The spooky sat behind the door, says

283
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Yogie Fish twenty nineteen. Once it's a year back, the

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gender war is officially over, just like the boss chick era.

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I'd be happy with both of those eras being over

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for sure, but I'm not sure that I believe that.

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He goes on to say, the overwhelming majority of men

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are not trying to get in a permanent relationship with

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women who have high body counts, and so that I

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guess that's an upside of being celibate. You would seem

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unless you did a lot of it, well as you

292
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had a prolific hoe era before you became to celebrate celibate.

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Speaker 2: No, but what I'm talking about is with like with Spook,

294
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I agree with everything you say, except for the high

295
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body count, because unless she's seventeen and you just meeting her,

296
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the average person is going to have a high body

297
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count their eyes, unless somebody just got married when they

298
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was you know, right out of high school seventeen, they

299
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was together for forty years and then they just got

300
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a divorced or you know, or he died that other

301
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than that, when you go into relationships, said when you

302
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when you're going through relationships just thinking a person is

303
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the one, you could have said, Yeah, I.

304
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Speaker 1: Have my own theories about that too, because I feel like,

305
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of course, you don't want to have body bags piled up.

306
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But I feel like men say that when they're not

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really into someone. If if Rihanna was liking you, you

308
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wouldn't care what her body count was. If Beyonce was

309
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liking you, you wouldn't care what her body count. Well,

310
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I don't know. I'm not a man. Maybe I'm wrong?

311
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Am I right?

312
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Speaker 2: Stop asking?

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Speaker 1: Right? Right, right, right? But it's but that doesn't have

314
00:18:54,039 --> 00:18:57,920
anything to do with why you chose, why you yourself

315
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are choosing celibacy, not trying to slow down the body count.

316
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Speaker 2: But also too, is I stopped counting okay because I

317
00:19:07,440 --> 00:19:09,200
do what I want to do out here? And then

318
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also too, is.

319
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Speaker 1: The a man?

320
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Speaker 2: You need to stop asking because that is a question

321
00:19:15,839 --> 00:19:18,400
that hurts you. It don't hurt the woman, it hurts you.

322
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She just moves right on, honey, to collect another one.

323
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And guess what you out here doing the same thing.

324
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Most of y'all got a double y'all, most of our

325
00:19:27,359 --> 00:19:30,200
body count is double what we got, and you worried

326
00:19:30,200 --> 00:19:33,400
about the body count. That is the wrong question, Like

327
00:19:33,559 --> 00:19:35,599
you need you need to stop asking that. But I

328
00:19:35,720 --> 00:19:40,240
do believe I do agree with Spoops about the you know,

329
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when he mentioned the gender ward, I want them to

330
00:19:43,720 --> 00:19:48,119
be over too, because that is what divides many people

331
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from getting together. Men are are you know if you

332
00:19:51,880 --> 00:19:54,720
like a video, one of the negative Mirron Games video,

333
00:19:54,839 --> 00:19:57,039
which I would not let him claim that he is

334
00:19:57,119 --> 00:20:00,359
from the Black Rays, honey, I would. You know, if

335
00:20:00,400 --> 00:20:03,519
you like it one of those negative videos, A bunch

336
00:20:03,559 --> 00:20:06,119
of those negative videos come up, you respond to it,

337
00:20:06,400 --> 00:20:08,720
and that's wuld be on your timeline. And those are

338
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divisive things. So that's why you know you got a

339
00:20:12,039 --> 00:20:14,000
lot of these men. And then of course you have

340
00:20:14,160 --> 00:20:16,799
this very masculine hip hop music. I just went to

341
00:20:17,400 --> 00:20:20,119
this bar the other night, you know, thinking I was gonna.

342
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Speaker 1: Hear some R and B.

343
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Speaker 2: In every every song was this masculine song that was

344
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very masculine attracting, and all these men was in there.

345
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But the music was just like all I need her

346
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to do was SUNI and see and and I'm gonna

347
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just leave hold that.

348
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Speaker 1: Son. I thought. We've got news driv against sports and

349
00:20:40,720 --> 00:20:43,200
and more. We're talking celibacy. You're invited in eight hundred

350
00:20:43,319 --> 00:20:47,400
nine two oh, fifteen eighty KBLA Talk, fifteen eighty, j

351
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BLA Talk fifteen eighty. We're talking celibacy today, Del Harrison

352
00:20:52,319 --> 00:20:56,359
is my guest. She's a comedian, she's a writer and actress,

353
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a singer, and a host. She also has an app

354
00:21:03,519 --> 00:21:07,519
called Cambaie, which will help you find your match, and

355
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she has chosen for herself celibacy. Celibacy our topic today

356
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this hour, and we were talking off the air too,

357
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of course you on the air, you were saying, men

358
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need to stop asking about body count. This is one

359
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of the areas where there's a complete double standard. You

360
00:21:26,160 --> 00:21:28,880
got a man like well Chamberlain, how many women did

361
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he say he was with ten thousand or something crazy

362
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like that, And so men go around bragging about it

363
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like it makes them somehow a conqueror or a you know,

364
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some kind of a I don't know, Romeo or something.

365
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But women are shamed for it. So it's not the same.

366
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It's it's it's you know, it's not the same in society.

367
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Speaker 2: And we shamed for it because you know, we we

368
00:21:59,200 --> 00:22:04,160
we generally make better decisions about sleeping with people. So

369
00:22:04,440 --> 00:22:09,039
it does signify when a woman has a high body account.

370
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It does signify in the past she's been sleeping with

371
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people that didn't want her, or you know, she didn't

372
00:22:16,000 --> 00:22:18,759
want or there was something there because generally we do

373
00:22:19,160 --> 00:22:23,279
like to be with one man. But they are avoiding

374
00:22:23,359 --> 00:22:25,400
the fact that, you know, some of these men are

375
00:22:25,480 --> 00:22:27,960
slick out here and will tell you anything and will

376
00:22:28,000 --> 00:22:30,039
make you feel like, oh, y'all might be getting married,

377
00:22:30,480 --> 00:22:32,119
you know, in the morning, just give it up to

378
00:22:32,240 --> 00:22:34,519
night and in the morning he is dos.

379
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Speaker 1: But I mean, we have to trick a man into

380
00:22:38,119 --> 00:22:40,200
like marrying us if he was gonna be ghosts anyway.

381
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I don't know. I feel like, I'm sure that's not

382
00:22:43,599 --> 00:22:48,599
why you're practicing celibacy. But to me, the era of

383
00:22:48,759 --> 00:22:51,920
playing games, I don't know. For me, it's just over.

384
00:22:52,119 --> 00:22:54,680
Either you're you're gonna do what you say or you're not.

385
00:22:55,599 --> 00:22:57,319
I don't want to do all that, not because I

386
00:22:57,400 --> 00:22:59,799
don't care, but because it doesn't work.

387
00:23:02,359 --> 00:23:04,839
Speaker 2: No, And I agree with you. And that's the thing is,

388
00:23:05,000 --> 00:23:06,960
and that's why a lot of people are choosing it,

389
00:23:07,400 --> 00:23:09,960
because if you are gonna do what you say, you're

390
00:23:09,960 --> 00:23:12,640
gonna do what you say, regardless of the sac Because

391
00:23:12,640 --> 00:23:15,119
the thing about it, too is you can't even get

392
00:23:15,200 --> 00:23:18,200
to know, Like if you look at these marriage shows,

393
00:23:18,319 --> 00:23:24,240
dominique like married at first side, Fine, me too, me too.

394
00:23:24,400 --> 00:23:26,799
I am fascinated with the show. But all of the

395
00:23:26,920 --> 00:23:31,079
ones that flee together right away, they usually break up

396
00:23:31,240 --> 00:23:32,039
for some reason.

397
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Speaker 1: Okay, fair, fair fair, But then you look at it.

398
00:23:35,559 --> 00:23:38,039
At my friend Shirley Strawberry, she was celibate for a

399
00:23:38,119 --> 00:23:41,480
couple of years, several years she finally found this man

400
00:23:41,599 --> 00:23:43,440
and married him, and he turned out to be a crook.

401
00:23:44,200 --> 00:23:48,799
So even the whole I do thing doesn't necessarily, you know,

402
00:23:49,039 --> 00:23:52,000
protect you. I don't know.

403
00:23:52,279 --> 00:23:54,640
Speaker 2: The thing about it, too is your decision. See. The

404
00:23:54,720 --> 00:23:57,400
thing about it too is you cannot be waiting in

405
00:23:57,559 --> 00:24:01,200
desperation now, like when you're waiting for the lawyer to

406
00:24:01,279 --> 00:24:04,559
sing you your wife or yourself, you know, your husband

407
00:24:04,640 --> 00:24:07,799
to find you. You can't be waiting in deceration, so

408
00:24:07,920 --> 00:24:10,759
you marry anything. There are still signs like you know

409
00:24:11,000 --> 00:24:14,279
that that you can look for and still lives that

410
00:24:14,359 --> 00:24:17,359
people call because I'm sure he wasn't up, you know up.

411
00:24:17,759 --> 00:24:19,960
I'm sure she was laid up some nights to perspect

412
00:24:20,000 --> 00:24:22,200
that he was. But she wanted to get married just

413
00:24:22,279 --> 00:24:24,640
so much so she can have to say, you know,

414
00:24:24,839 --> 00:24:27,000
and I don't know her specific situation, but that's what

415
00:24:27,079 --> 00:24:29,319
happens to a lot of people. They miss out on

416
00:24:29,400 --> 00:24:31,960
the red flags because of the thing you want, and

417
00:24:32,480 --> 00:24:35,559
you can't want the thing so much that your vision

418
00:24:35,720 --> 00:24:39,160
is now blinded by good You know, you you're not

419
00:24:39,240 --> 00:24:42,720
making good decisions because you're desperate for their end results.

420
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Speaker 1: I mean, you know, Forensic says many wouldn't be interested

421
00:24:47,839 --> 00:24:50,559
in any Rihanna anyway since she ain't FBA at all.

422
00:24:50,960 --> 00:24:58,240
I'm sorry, Forensic earlying. I'm sorry you foundational Black American

423
00:24:58,400 --> 00:25:01,519
like because she's from Barbadi and not from here. That's

424
00:25:01,680 --> 00:25:04,119
just those are the things folks say when they think

425
00:25:04,279 --> 00:25:09,079
Rihanna will never ever be interested in them. You know,

426
00:25:10,079 --> 00:25:11,400
would you date Rihanna Miles?

427
00:25:15,240 --> 00:25:15,400
Speaker 3: Yes?

428
00:25:15,599 --> 00:25:24,960
Speaker 1: What but if but if a woman tells you I'm celibate,

429
00:25:25,200 --> 00:25:27,279
would that be a red flag or a green flag

430
00:25:27,359 --> 00:25:28,759
for you? That's not it.

431
00:25:29,000 --> 00:25:31,000
Speaker 4: That's not a red flag. I mean it's a conversation

432
00:25:31,119 --> 00:25:32,880
to have, for sure, but I mean it does not

433
00:25:32,960 --> 00:25:34,720
a red flag. I'm not holding nothing against you for that.

434
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Speaker 3: I mean, you know, it's it's your reasoning for everything,

435
00:25:37,519 --> 00:25:37,839
for sure.

436
00:25:39,400 --> 00:25:39,640
Speaker 1: Yeah.

437
00:25:40,519 --> 00:25:43,400
Speaker 2: Some people that told me they've been offended by a

438
00:25:43,559 --> 00:25:47,759
man told me that he was offended when he hears

439
00:25:48,319 --> 00:25:52,119
a woman is celibate, like he takes personal offense. And

440
00:25:52,279 --> 00:25:55,279
see that's a man right there. He lived by his flesh.

441
00:25:55,400 --> 00:25:58,839
And you know this, this man was also single. And

442
00:25:59,160 --> 00:26:01,640
and it's because you living by the flash and you

443
00:26:01,839 --> 00:26:03,000
need everybody to sleep with you.

444
00:26:03,200 --> 00:26:09,039
Speaker 1: Last week, Forensica to count and says Dominque, I'm being facetious. Okay, good,

445
00:26:09,119 --> 00:26:11,680
because I knew that was a lie. If Rihanna came

446
00:26:11,759 --> 00:26:14,079
up and started nibbling on your neck, it would be over.

447
00:26:15,359 --> 00:26:18,480
Just saying, but what's the endgame? I mean, if you

448
00:26:18,599 --> 00:26:22,839
met a woman, Miles who said I'm celibate by choice,

449
00:26:24,240 --> 00:26:26,799
would you date her? Because I feel like that means

450
00:26:27,200 --> 00:26:31,920
probably And maybe maybe I'm making an assumption, Dell, but

451
00:26:32,079 --> 00:26:34,279
to me, it sounds like she's waiting for marriage.

452
00:26:34,519 --> 00:26:36,440
Speaker 4: I mean that's why I'm saying the conversation should be

453
00:26:36,519 --> 00:26:39,279
had at that point. It's not an automatic deal breaker because,

454
00:26:39,279 --> 00:26:41,119
like I say, it could be for any number of reasons,

455
00:26:41,160 --> 00:26:43,640
your health reasons, your personal reasons, your spiritual journey.

456
00:26:43,640 --> 00:26:45,359
Speaker 3: I get it, I get and understand all of them.

457
00:26:45,400 --> 00:26:47,119
Speaker 4: I may not be the man to stick around with

458
00:26:47,279 --> 00:26:49,319
you through all that, but it's worth a conversation for show.

459
00:26:49,359 --> 00:26:50,160
Speaker 3: It's not a deal breaker.

460
00:26:51,039 --> 00:26:54,920
Speaker 1: And what is what is the endgame? I mean, when

461
00:26:55,000 --> 00:26:58,880
do you break the fasts? Dell? Are we waiting forever?

462
00:26:59,119 --> 00:27:01,279
Are we waiting till we get married? Are you waiting

463
00:27:01,440 --> 00:27:05,279
until you know? The Lord comes down and says, that's

464
00:27:05,359 --> 00:27:07,880
your guy. You don't have to marry him. You can

465
00:27:08,039 --> 00:27:10,440
sleep for them tonight, Like, what what's.

466
00:27:10,319 --> 00:27:14,200
Speaker 2: The down and say I'm gonna sleep with him tonight?

467
00:27:14,440 --> 00:27:16,319
The NOOI ain't. I'm gonna come down and say that.

468
00:27:16,759 --> 00:27:20,240
The thing about it, too is you know, uh, I

469
00:27:20,400 --> 00:27:24,480
feel like when you are when you have an exploration

470
00:27:24,720 --> 00:27:29,519
date is because you don't believe it's gonna happen, so

471
00:27:29,680 --> 00:27:32,440
you just like it don't happen by this day, I'm

472
00:27:32,480 --> 00:27:35,960
gonna just do it. It's gonna happen. I'm worthy of

473
00:27:36,160 --> 00:27:39,759
a person, you know. I'm worthy of a person. First

474
00:27:39,759 --> 00:27:42,960
of all, I've been married before, okay, and I'm worthy

475
00:27:43,079 --> 00:27:46,079
of a person. So if I'm worthy of a person,

476
00:27:46,400 --> 00:27:48,880
that means that I know that someone is out there

477
00:27:49,279 --> 00:27:51,960
and guess what, I don't feel like my husband is

478
00:27:52,079 --> 00:27:54,720
somewhere dumps and diving in the trash can, sleeping with

479
00:27:54,799 --> 00:27:57,680
everybody on the first night, just until he gets to me.

480
00:27:57,880 --> 00:28:00,680
I do believe that he is also a man that's

481
00:28:00,839 --> 00:28:04,279
just like me. That's practice of self control and walking

482
00:28:04,359 --> 00:28:06,799
with the law and on purpose. And I feel like

483
00:28:06,960 --> 00:28:09,799
a lot of people are lacking, Like when you are

484
00:28:09,920 --> 00:28:13,359
living by the flesh, you're just so desiring the flesh.

485
00:28:13,599 --> 00:28:17,119
A lot of times you're lacking purpose, lacking.

486
00:28:17,200 --> 00:28:20,240
Speaker 1: Okay, I see Miles making a face, So Miles wants

487
00:28:20,240 --> 00:28:21,759
to say, so, I'm gonna turn it over to him

488
00:28:22,079 --> 00:28:23,640
instead of what I was about to say.

489
00:28:23,799 --> 00:28:26,559
Speaker 4: So, I gotta remember we're talking about celibacy, so I

490
00:28:26,640 --> 00:28:29,559
want to stay on topic a little bit. But if

491
00:28:29,839 --> 00:28:32,039
if a man wants to take his time before he

492
00:28:32,079 --> 00:28:33,519
gets down on one knee and marror, you had a

493
00:28:33,559 --> 00:28:35,720
time dating the end date for that before you walk away,

494
00:28:35,759 --> 00:28:37,240
and you say, you know what, he's not the one

495
00:28:37,319 --> 00:28:37,519
for you.

496
00:28:37,599 --> 00:28:39,319
Speaker 3: So I mean, what's what's wrong withold happen to end

497
00:28:39,359 --> 00:28:39,720
date for it?

498
00:28:42,480 --> 00:28:44,640
Speaker 2: Having an end date for the celibacy.

499
00:28:44,880 --> 00:28:46,880
Speaker 4: The celibacy, you're saying, there's no end date for it's

500
00:28:46,880 --> 00:28:49,000
gonna happen eventually. Just wait on it's gonna happen. To

501
00:28:49,119 --> 00:28:51,119
act like it's not gonna happen, you being impatient. If

502
00:28:51,160 --> 00:28:53,039
I said the same thing about getting down and getting

503
00:28:53,039 --> 00:28:54,319
you that ring and making you my wife.

504
00:28:54,400 --> 00:28:54,839
Speaker 1: I love you.

505
00:28:55,279 --> 00:28:58,319
Speaker 3: It's gonna happen like I love you. We have we're

506
00:28:58,480 --> 00:28:59,240
building something.

507
00:28:59,440 --> 00:29:02,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, and also right, well'll let you answer his question.

508
00:29:02,799 --> 00:29:07,200
Speaker 2: Okay, but again, but if if it is gonna happen,

509
00:29:07,480 --> 00:29:10,880
then we just don't wait on each other. If you

510
00:29:11,119 --> 00:29:14,440
need me to, if you need me to, now hurry

511
00:29:14,559 --> 00:29:17,799
up my process. So, but I need to wait on

512
00:29:17,920 --> 00:29:20,880
your process, then we are not equally your So.

513
00:29:21,319 --> 00:29:24,640
Speaker 1: So no, no test drive at all. You're gonna marry

514
00:29:24,680 --> 00:29:28,119
this person without ever sampling the goods?

515
00:29:29,400 --> 00:29:35,359
Speaker 2: Okay, but the thing about it too, Okay, No, No,

516
00:29:36,000 --> 00:29:38,240
I'm going to answer it to you right now. First

517
00:29:38,240 --> 00:29:40,359
of all, I don't be friends with you at all

518
00:29:40,519 --> 00:29:42,839
unless I know it's good. But I don't need to

519
00:29:42,880 --> 00:29:45,319
sleep with you. My instinct is, oh, I've had a

520
00:29:45,440 --> 00:29:47,400
past life, so I can look at a man and

521
00:29:47,480 --> 00:29:49,920
I can see exactly with this section is I can

522
00:29:49,960 --> 00:29:51,599
see if you're good. I can see if you're not

523
00:29:51,920 --> 00:29:52,680
within second.

524
00:29:53,279 --> 00:29:57,000
Speaker 1: So okay, well, that would be a hell of a

525
00:29:57,079 --> 00:30:00,480
mistake if you were just wrong that one time. Now

526
00:30:00,519 --> 00:30:11,480
it's okay, all right, Uh, we don't leave that right there. No,

527
00:30:11,720 --> 00:30:15,640
because honestly, there's some things that are chemistry, and it

528
00:30:15,759 --> 00:30:18,519
doesn't only have to do with equipment. If that's what

529
00:30:18,599 --> 00:30:23,319
you're looking at, IM just saying uh anyway.

530
00:30:23,720 --> 00:30:26,039
Speaker 2: So no, no, no, but I feel like that's why

531
00:30:26,160 --> 00:30:27,759
you get to know a See.

532
00:30:27,839 --> 00:30:28,279
Speaker 1: This is the thing.

533
00:30:28,440 --> 00:30:31,200
Speaker 2: The thing about it, too, is when you're getting to

534
00:30:31,400 --> 00:30:34,920
know a person, these are the things that bond you

535
00:30:35,680 --> 00:30:39,359
like you can when you's sex as one bond, But

536
00:30:39,559 --> 00:30:42,039
there are so many other bonds that you need to

537
00:30:42,160 --> 00:30:45,839
make before you jump over into this field, because sex

538
00:30:46,039 --> 00:30:49,079
before you know all all these other bonds is a

539
00:30:49,160 --> 00:30:50,880
false bar. And then you wake up in the morning,

540
00:30:51,200 --> 00:30:53,359
you know, three months later and be like, I actually

541
00:30:53,400 --> 00:30:55,920
hate this person. And that's what happens a lot of people.

542
00:30:56,400 --> 00:30:59,359
You get you have it said, he looks so good

543
00:30:59,759 --> 00:31:01,519
you it's like I just met this dude. He looks

544
00:31:01,519 --> 00:31:04,240
Oh my god, he is and then you'd be like,

545
00:31:04,359 --> 00:31:08,160
wait a minute, this old on, this brother is inconsistent,

546
00:31:08,279 --> 00:31:10,440
this brother is this. And this is not to take

547
00:31:10,519 --> 00:31:13,160
every man, but I'm talking about when you don't take

548
00:31:13,200 --> 00:31:13,680
the time.

549
00:31:14,079 --> 00:31:15,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, go ahead, Miles.

550
00:31:16,839 --> 00:31:19,559
Speaker 3: Is bad sex a relationship ender for you? Or do

551
00:31:19,599 --> 00:31:21,400
you stay with mister bad sex?

552
00:31:23,319 --> 00:31:23,480
Speaker 1: Oh?

553
00:31:23,559 --> 00:31:27,079
Speaker 2: No, bad sex is a is a relationship not starter.

554
00:31:27,680 --> 00:31:30,119
If I don't think it's that we don't even we

555
00:31:30,240 --> 00:31:32,599
don't even get to know each other. We don't talk.

556
00:31:33,319 --> 00:31:37,839
Speaker 1: But since you're celeb, wouldn't know until you already said I.

557
00:31:37,920 --> 00:31:40,920
Speaker 2: Do, I wouldn't know immediately. I would know immediately.

558
00:31:41,359 --> 00:31:44,240
Speaker 1: Okay, well maybe you know what, Maybe I need to

559
00:31:44,279 --> 00:31:47,720
have you vet anyway, I know. I mean, it was

560
00:31:47,759 --> 00:31:51,000
the same question Joki said. He says, what if you're perfect,

561
00:31:51,039 --> 00:31:53,359
man doesn't have a magic one? Is that a deal breaker?

562
00:31:53,720 --> 00:31:55,720
But you've already said I do. You're not gonna go

563
00:31:55,799 --> 00:32:00,480
get another divorce because the man is the fishing in

564
00:32:00,559 --> 00:32:00,960
the sack.

565
00:32:02,640 --> 00:32:06,960
Speaker 2: I think that, y'all like and and and maybe it's

566
00:32:07,000 --> 00:32:10,480
because I have had I have lived a very full

567
00:32:10,680 --> 00:32:14,839
life in this area. My my body does not even

568
00:32:14,960 --> 00:32:19,720
wake up until we are sexually compatible. So like, I

569
00:32:19,759 --> 00:32:22,759
don't I know it off the break and yours doesn't either,

570
00:32:22,920 --> 00:32:26,799
Like you know, it's something that's natural with us when

571
00:32:26,839 --> 00:32:29,279
you when you take away the desperation, it's something that's

572
00:32:29,440 --> 00:32:32,720
natural like and mouth, please speak to this too. It's

573
00:32:32,799 --> 00:32:36,720
just something about your body that you know what it's

574
00:32:36,759 --> 00:32:38,480
gonna be like with this word, It's like when I

575
00:32:38,640 --> 00:32:41,440
meet some men something that I've had sexual relationship with,

576
00:32:42,039 --> 00:32:44,359
I already knew it was good, Like just talking on

577
00:32:44,440 --> 00:32:46,200
the phone. I already knew what it was gonna be like.

578
00:32:46,599 --> 00:32:49,039
I didn't have to guess that is what you know.

579
00:32:50,519 --> 00:32:55,720
Speaker 1: You be delusional and sincere at the same time. If

580
00:32:55,759 --> 00:32:57,839
you're not a vision and you're talking about getting married

581
00:32:57,880 --> 00:33:00,319
but your celibate, I'm going to want to test drive

582
00:33:00,400 --> 00:33:00,960
before I.

583
00:33:01,240 --> 00:33:05,519
Speaker 2: Buy, just saying, please test drive all day long email.

584
00:33:05,599 --> 00:33:08,119
But are you married right now? Are you married right now?

585
00:33:08,319 --> 00:33:11,000
Speaker 1: I don't think he is. I think he's in our relationship,

586
00:33:12,359 --> 00:33:14,720
test driving with no car note.

587
00:33:17,200 --> 00:33:20,079
Speaker 2: Going down to the dealer, just test driving it. Yes,

588
00:33:20,200 --> 00:33:24,000
but is never gonna get an official loan. She is

589
00:33:24,119 --> 00:33:26,480
never gonna get the car. Note that you've been pro.

590
00:33:27,400 --> 00:33:30,880
Speaker 1: Paul says, you're you're in the X Men. You got superpowers?

591
00:33:31,119 --> 00:33:33,720
All right, we'll shoot Dale Harrison, you might need them.

592
00:33:34,039 --> 00:33:38,559
We're talking celibacy. I'm not judging. I'm just trying to

593
00:33:39,039 --> 00:33:42,880
understand and of course having some conversation. That's what we

594
00:33:42,960 --> 00:33:47,640
do around here. We are KBLA Talk fifteen eighty DJ

595
00:33:48,039 --> 00:33:50,720
Black nine or nine says A no shame in celibacy

596
00:33:50,960 --> 00:33:55,039
and abstinence, certainly not saying there's shame in it. For me,

597
00:33:55,119 --> 00:33:56,920
it would be like I think it would be like

598
00:33:57,480 --> 00:34:00,279
going on a really strict diet. The minute I do that,

599
00:34:00,400 --> 00:34:03,160
I want to eat all the time. If I'm just

600
00:34:03,279 --> 00:34:05,599
living my life and I'm not focused on that, I'm

601
00:34:06,119 --> 00:34:08,719
you know, just living my life and and I'm still

602
00:34:08,800 --> 00:34:11,800
living within my morals and principles. It's not for me.

603
00:34:11,920 --> 00:34:15,320
It's not one extreme either your dumpster diving, as del

604
00:34:15,400 --> 00:34:19,440
Harrison so delicately put it, or you're you know, or

605
00:34:19,559 --> 00:34:22,519
you're absin, and I fully feel like there's a there's

606
00:34:22,559 --> 00:34:27,400
a sweet spot in between. Miles. Would you ever go celibate?

607
00:34:28,320 --> 00:34:30,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm curious that how long is it had to

608
00:34:30,960 --> 00:34:32,280
be gone to you consider?

609
00:34:34,760 --> 00:34:38,079
Speaker 1: How long do you do without when until it's considered? Yeah,

610
00:34:38,119 --> 00:34:40,000
that's true. I'm celibating.

611
00:34:43,960 --> 00:34:44,360
Speaker 3: The summer.

612
00:34:44,440 --> 00:34:51,320
Speaker 2: So yeah, I think it's when it's intentional, you know,

613
00:34:52,559 --> 00:34:55,199
when you when you just yeah, if it's on purpose,

614
00:34:55,280 --> 00:34:57,679
then yeah, you've been celebrated. That's that's what it is.

615
00:34:57,880 --> 00:35:00,559
Speaker 1: I mean, you know, Okay, so even if it's minutes

616
00:35:00,679 --> 00:35:05,679
because you intentionally said that you're celibate, it counts. Got it.

617
00:35:06,159 --> 00:35:09,800
Speaking of sex, the US Supreme Court did reject Donald

618
00:35:09,800 --> 00:35:13,480
Trump's push thank you forensic to throw out that verdict

619
00:35:13,519 --> 00:35:16,880
and the sex abuse case. So celibate or otherwise, e

620
00:35:17,039 --> 00:35:20,679
gen Carrol is going to keep her five point three million,

621
00:35:22,320 --> 00:35:26,039
and she may be getting the eighty three million. So anyway,

622
00:35:26,119 --> 00:35:30,519
I digress. So how's it going? Do you feel better?

623
00:35:30,679 --> 00:35:33,800
Do you feel different? Do you? I mean you said

624
00:35:33,840 --> 00:35:37,079
you got these spidy senses going where you can. I'm sorry,

625
00:35:37,119 --> 00:35:41,599
I don't mean to question your but you you never know.

626
00:35:42,039 --> 00:35:44,880
But anyway, are you feeling different? Is there? Are you

627
00:35:45,000 --> 00:35:47,840
feeling the upside of this decision in your life and

628
00:35:49,440 --> 00:35:51,119
and and seeing the benefits of it.

629
00:35:53,360 --> 00:35:57,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm definitely seeing the benefits. Also to Dominique, we

630
00:35:57,079 --> 00:36:00,079
need to go out so I can go head and

631
00:36:00,159 --> 00:36:02,199
and vc you some guys and then you can test

632
00:36:02,280 --> 00:36:04,239
out my theory and you can let me know that

633
00:36:04,320 --> 00:36:04,800
you got.

634
00:36:06,079 --> 00:36:08,400
Speaker 1: Sleeping with a bunch of guys, like what the heck?

635
00:36:08,559 --> 00:36:14,960
Speaker 2: No, No, I turn out the absolute one, just one.

636
00:36:16,519 --> 00:36:16,559
Speaker 1: No.

637
00:36:16,760 --> 00:36:19,079
Speaker 2: I'm talking about you saying you don't know what the

638
00:36:19,199 --> 00:36:21,519
sex is like, and I'm making you know. We can

639
00:36:21,599 --> 00:36:23,679
spend one night out and I could be like, ah,

640
00:36:24,000 --> 00:36:27,840
dominate don't was okay, I think he now he gonna

641
00:36:27,840 --> 00:36:30,079
be like, I'm telling you you need to go out

642
00:36:30,199 --> 00:36:33,360
because I don't. You know, at this day and age,

643
00:36:33,639 --> 00:36:37,559
you know, fighting senses is way up, but it's going way.

644
00:36:37,679 --> 00:36:42,400
It's going well because I don't have the interference of

645
00:36:42,639 --> 00:36:48,039
the flash constantly, you know, directing my emotion.

646
00:36:48,360 --> 00:36:53,400
Speaker 1: As doctor gill as Doctor gil Wyatt, the sex therapist, psychologist,

647
00:36:53,480 --> 00:36:57,320
psychiatrist says sex is a human need like food, water,

648
00:36:58,679 --> 00:37:03,599
you know, housing, you know, human touch and sexuality is

649
00:37:03,679 --> 00:37:05,960
one of our needs. So you could go the other

650
00:37:06,039 --> 00:37:09,320
way and say you're gonna get more uptight, less relax

651
00:37:09,440 --> 00:37:12,960
perhaps less likely to make a clear eye decision if

652
00:37:13,000 --> 00:37:14,880
you go too long without any sex.

653
00:37:16,360 --> 00:37:20,079
Speaker 2: Okay, sex is a need, I completely agree. But just

654
00:37:20,159 --> 00:37:21,920
like people fast from sugar.

655
00:37:22,119 --> 00:37:25,440
Speaker 1: And you know, sure is not a need. Coffee is

656
00:37:25,559 --> 00:37:26,119
not a need.

657
00:37:27,199 --> 00:37:31,039
Speaker 2: Okay. But just like people fast, the body from different

658
00:37:31,199 --> 00:37:35,280
things that they need to clear it out of, sex

659
00:37:35,440 --> 00:37:38,599
is one of those things. It's a need, especially when

660
00:37:38,639 --> 00:37:41,239
you have a right partner. But I'm sure if you

661
00:37:41,320 --> 00:37:43,440
talk to Yail right now, she's like, oh, don't just

662
00:37:43,480 --> 00:37:47,360
sleep with anybody. You're gonna have to find rightfully aligned partner.

663
00:37:47,480 --> 00:37:49,719
Speaker 1: Well, yeah, she does say don't just sleep with anyone.

664
00:37:49,840 --> 00:37:53,280
But and in fact she says, when you don't have anyone,

665
00:37:53,360 --> 00:37:56,519
you're better off pleasure in yourself than going without. But

666
00:37:56,679 --> 00:38:00,840
that's another conversation for another day perhaps, But I don't

667
00:38:00,880 --> 00:38:03,360
think it's you know, that's like saying, oh, hunger is

668
00:38:03,400 --> 00:38:05,239
only a need when you have good food. No, you

669
00:38:05,400 --> 00:38:08,000
have to have food. I mean, you know, I rather

670
00:38:08,079 --> 00:38:09,800
you don't eat fast food, but I don't want you

671
00:38:09,920 --> 00:38:10,280
to die.

672
00:38:12,960 --> 00:38:15,800
Speaker 2: Yeah. The thing is too is sex is not the

673
00:38:15,920 --> 00:38:20,679
same as fast food. Sex is something that is going

674
00:38:20,960 --> 00:38:25,519
into your body from another person. So that's why you

675
00:38:25,639 --> 00:38:28,119
need it rightfully alive. Fast food you go over here

676
00:38:28,159 --> 00:38:31,199
and get your own Popeyes yourself, you know, and you

677
00:38:31,280 --> 00:38:33,320
can do whatever you want to with the fried chicken,

678
00:38:33,480 --> 00:38:35,199
even though you're not supposed to be having it. But

679
00:38:35,480 --> 00:38:39,320
seg it can destroy you when you are after it

680
00:38:40,199 --> 00:38:44,760
from anyone. And that's what people got to understand is, yeah,

681
00:38:44,840 --> 00:38:46,639
it's a need. Yeah, we need to be having And

682
00:38:46,760 --> 00:38:49,440
this does not mean you can't meet someone. And y'all

683
00:38:49,599 --> 00:38:54,400
not affectionate, y'all not hugging you know, y'all. I mean

684
00:38:54,599 --> 00:38:58,320
I don't be kissing. You know I'm not I'm not

685
00:38:58,599 --> 00:39:00,360
said I'm not a kisser or whatever, but you know,

686
00:39:00,800 --> 00:39:04,440
a hug is extremely intimate. The kids on the forehead

687
00:39:04,559 --> 00:39:07,480
is extremely intimate. So there are some things you can

688
00:39:07,599 --> 00:39:11,360
experience when you're dating someone that that makes it feel

689
00:39:11,440 --> 00:39:13,960
like say, that makes it feel just as fulfilling with

690
00:39:14,119 --> 00:39:16,360
the touch, because it's the tail.

691
00:39:16,599 --> 00:39:19,119
Speaker 1: We don't leave it there because it's almost time to

692
00:39:19,440 --> 00:39:22,639
pass the mic. Mind folks how to find you your

693
00:39:22,719 --> 00:39:25,480
come by a app so they can find someone celibate

694
00:39:25,559 --> 00:39:26,199
or otherwise.

695
00:39:27,599 --> 00:39:33,519
Speaker 2: Okay, y'all find me and I am Dale Harrison. Find

696
00:39:33,599 --> 00:39:36,960
my app AI. It is a comby Yer is not

697
00:39:37,079 --> 00:39:39,679
a dating app. It is an AI powered location to

698
00:39:40,199 --> 00:39:43,360
the health Black singles over forty five each other in person.

699
00:39:43,679 --> 00:39:45,960
So you're not going on the apps to anyone and

700
00:39:46,079 --> 00:39:48,760
swipe and send out any d M. You're going on

701
00:39:48,920 --> 00:39:51,480
there so that you could check in. The checking list

702
00:39:51,599 --> 00:39:53,639
is available for you to find where people are and

703
00:39:53,760 --> 00:39:56,719
then you're gonna see the heat map to see the

704
00:39:56,840 --> 00:39:58,199
area popular singles.

705
00:40:00,559 --> 00:40:04,760
Speaker 1: Komb Ye Del Harrison, thank you so much. I always

706
00:40:04,800 --> 00:40:07,440
appreciate the conversation with you. You're such a great sport.

707
00:40:08,519 --> 00:40:10,880
Thank you so much, and you can tap in with

708
00:40:10,960 --> 00:40:13,800
me at Duprema Radio, d P R I, m A

709
00:40:14,039 --> 00:40:16,559
and then radio on all platforms. You can find us

710
00:40:17,119 --> 00:40:21,199
at KBLA fifteen eighty. It's time for me to pass

711
00:40:21,280 --> 00:40:25,880
the mic. Doctor Cornell West End, Congresswoman Maxine Waters coming

712
00:40:25,960 --> 00:40:28,599
up next hour. Like my mama, the late great Diane

713
00:40:28,679 --> 00:40:32,400
da Prima used to say, the ultimate famine is the

714
00:40:32,480 --> 00:40:37,239
starvation of the imagination. Until next time, my KBLA delegation,

715
00:40:38,039 --> 00:40:38,599
one love,