WEBVTT

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<v Speaker 1>Standing up or sitting down during a concert. Now, we

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<v Speaker 1>talked about this. It comes up once in a while

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<v Speaker 1>if you go to a concert and you always stand

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<v Speaker 1>up during the first opening song or two, and then

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<v Speaker 1>you kind of sit down, you know me. Depending on

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<v Speaker 1>the concert. I mean, if you're at the let's say,

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<v Speaker 1>the Blink one eighty two concert or the Usher concert,

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<v Speaker 1>you might stand up a little bit longer because then.

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<v Speaker 2>You're going to sit down.

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<v Speaker 1>You're gonna sit down. Yeah. And artists, you know, they

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<v Speaker 1>One thing that I know about artists is they don't

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<v Speaker 1>like to load the front two rows or the front

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<v Speaker 1>section with rich people because rich people usually are older,

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<v Speaker 1>they're tired, they've been jaded, they don't want to sit,

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<v Speaker 1>they don't want to stand up because you know, Peter

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<v Speaker 1>and Marge have bad knees. They so rich people. The

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<v Speaker 1>artists don't like rich people.

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<v Speaker 2>In the front in the front, yeah, because rich people.

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<v Speaker 1>Are usually the ones who can get the tickets. So

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<v Speaker 1>my favorite story is the Paul McCartney concert. Susan and

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<v Speaker 1>I paid a lot of money to be in the

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<v Speaker 1>front row, and we were not really in the We

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<v Speaker 1>were technically in the front row, but way off to

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<v Speaker 1>the side. We might as well been like forty rows backs, sure,

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<v Speaker 1>because we had to crane our next to see Paul McCartney.

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<v Speaker 1>But in the front of him, we're all empty seats.

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<v Speaker 1>That his people went up into the cheap seats and

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<v Speaker 1>got young, energetic, fun people to sit in the front

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<v Speaker 1>even though they didn't pay for front row tickets. Tina

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<v Speaker 1>was one of those people that we used to work

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<v Speaker 1>on a show and Tina had like third level nosebleed seats,

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<v Speaker 1>but Tina got to sit for her eighty seven dollars tickets,

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<v Speaker 1>got to sit in like row number two.

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, that's a good life lesson in general, Like

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<v Speaker 2>if you're in public and Europe, maybe at a concert

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<v Speaker 2>or any kind of public attraction, be excited to be

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<v Speaker 2>there because you never know when you're going to get upgraded.

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<v Speaker 3>Seriously, it's so true because I also when I worked

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<v Speaker 3>at the Timberwolves, people would always be like, how can

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<v Speaker 3>I get on the court to do a game? Blah

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<v Speaker 3>blah blah blah, And you're always we were always looking

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<v Speaker 3>for people who were energetic and enthusiastic. You know, if

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<v Speaker 3>you come up to me and be like, hey, can

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<v Speaker 3>I get on the court for something?

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<v Speaker 2>I'm not having you on the court. We're now on

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<v Speaker 2>someone who's super super jazz. Yeah.

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<v Speaker 3>And also Tina's the queen of getting upgrades, I think

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<v Speaker 3>because I went with her to justin Timberlake and we

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<v Speaker 3>already had floor seats, but then someone came up to

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<v Speaker 3>us and literally brought us into the side section that

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<v Speaker 3>had like a bar and was.

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<v Speaker 2>Lit right next to the stage. Nice Like.

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<v Speaker 3>I was like, whoa, she's got that air about her ash. Yeah, guys,

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<v Speaker 3>you gotta go to concerts with Tina.

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, not as cool for me, but I have

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<v Speaker 2>gone to Harry Potter World in Universal a handful of times,

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<v Speaker 2>and the two times that I was in the wand Shop,

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<v Speaker 2>I got picked both times to have the wand Choosing

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<v Speaker 2>experience just from being an adult person that was excited

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<v Speaker 2>to be there. That's the only reason.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, my one experience I was all. I was at Universal,

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<v Speaker 1>and this was many years ago. We were down there

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<v Speaker 1>and about to go on the Alfred Hitchcock Psycho attraction,

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<v Speaker 1>and they I was screwing around with Patty Eberts and

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<v Speaker 1>we were making jokes and having a good time and laughing,

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<v Speaker 1>and they must have thought that I was like wonderfully energetic.

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<v Speaker 1>So they chose me as the volunteer that I would

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<v Speaker 1>get into the shower with the killer and then I

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<v Speaker 1>would disappear. It was a magic trick that I didn't

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<v Speaker 1>have to do anything except follow their lead, and because

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<v Speaker 1>I was energetic and happy. Well do you think about

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<v Speaker 1>like on Prices right, Yeah, the ones who get called

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<v Speaker 1>up to contestant row, they're always jumping and silly, and

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<v Speaker 1>they have a crazy shirt on and they're happy and

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<v Speaker 1>they're glad to be there. And a lot of the time,

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<v Speaker 1>I'll be honest with you, with radio stations, if you know,

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<v Speaker 1>if we take cold her number ten, we take called

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<v Speaker 1>her number ten, and a lot of the time it's

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<v Speaker 1>Brad from Hopkins who's got no energy whatsoever.

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<v Speaker 2>I win.

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<v Speaker 1>But if we have a choice, we're gonna play like

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<v Speaker 1>a game on the show, like the match game, or

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<v Speaker 1>we're gonna play password or something. We'll go through the

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<v Speaker 1>phone calls and we'll try to find somebody who's good

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<v Speaker 1>on the radio.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, or who's excited to be here and who really

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<v Speaker 2>wants technical right.

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<v Speaker 1>Who really wants tickets. Because the best thing ever is

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<v Speaker 1>like when they're like, oh my god, I won pink

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<v Speaker 1>tickets or whatever, and the worst thing is like, hey,

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<v Speaker 1>you want one thousand dollars. I remember years ago, when

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<v Speaker 1>I was new in radio, we would go out randomly

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<v Speaker 1>and it was like the ninety six Rock money Man

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<v Speaker 1>or something like that, and you'd go with one hundred

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<v Speaker 1>dollars bill and you would find somebody who is, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>happy looking, and you would say Hi. It's something like, hey,

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<v Speaker 1>what's your favorite radio station? And if you said ninety

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<v Speaker 1>six rock or whatever, you would get one hundred dollars.

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<v Speaker 1>So I found this woman and her daughter walking around

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<v Speaker 1>at the Citadel Mall in Colorado Springs, and they seemed

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<v Speaker 1>happy and joyful. So I stopped and I said, Hi,

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<v Speaker 1>what's your favorite radio station? Ninety six Rock? And I'm like, okay, great,

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<v Speaker 1>you in one hundred dollars and I'm recording them to

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<v Speaker 1>play on the radio. So I got the reporter out

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<v Speaker 1>and I'm like, god, you got one hundred dollars and

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<v Speaker 1>they're like thanks, and I'm like, my good.

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<v Speaker 2>God, truly you just won money.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, and back back then, especially, one hundred dollars was

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<v Speaker 1>like four hundred dollars.

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<v Speaker 3>Now, Yeah, iiez probably the worst winner when I won

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<v Speaker 3>the grand prize of the big Halloween contest on our

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<v Speaker 3>radio station, which was to Disney World. Because I was

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<v Speaker 3>so nervous, like they called me, because you'd enter in

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<v Speaker 3>you put like a slip in a bucket whenever, yeah,

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<v Speaker 3>told you. And I was just so nervous the night

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<v Speaker 3>even hung up accidentally because it was all it was

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<v Speaker 3>on a landline phone, and I hung up and they

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<v Speaker 3>luckily they had my number, so so they.

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<v Speaker 2>Called me back, and I was like, I just lost

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<v Speaker 2>my trip because I hung my house like an idiot.

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<v Speaker 3>But I was probably the worst winner because I was

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<v Speaker 3>just as shy. I was eight years old, so I

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<v Speaker 3>was a shy young kid. And yeah, I remember being excited,

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<v Speaker 3>but I also remember being like, oh my god.

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<v Speaker 2>And you had to talk on the phone to adults.

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<v Speaker 1>Terrifying quick stories. Not really, it's a little bit about

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<v Speaker 1>radio station contest. But so here's what happened. When I

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<v Speaker 1>was a kid. My brother and I used to listen

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<v Speaker 1>every morning to the radio while we got ready for school.

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<v Speaker 1>And I was probably five and he was probably ten,

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<v Speaker 1>and we used to listen to they called it the

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<v Speaker 1>minute Mystery, where it'd be like, okay, mister Smith was

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<v Speaker 1>murdered in his office and the suspects are blah blah

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<v Speaker 1>and blah blah, and here's the evidence. And it was

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<v Speaker 1>like a minute long. Yeah, and you would call in

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<v Speaker 1>if you knew the answer. My brother would try. He

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<v Speaker 1>was very smart. He would try every morning to call in.

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<v Speaker 1>He never got through. He finally got through. They put

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<v Speaker 1>him on the radio and they're like, Okay, who's solved them?

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<v Speaker 1>What's the solution And he's like, mister Johnson did it

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<v Speaker 1>with an X or whatever. And they go how old

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<v Speaker 1>are you? And he's like ten and they said, oh,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm sorry, you got to be at least twelve to

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<v Speaker 1>win this contest. And I remember him and it really

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<v Speaker 1>it really upset my brother because he'd been playing this

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<v Speaker 1>for so long. Nobody ever said you had to be

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<v Speaker 1>at least twelve years old.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>And I remember as a family, we were pissed at

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<v Speaker 1>that radio station because they put him on the air

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<v Speaker 1>live only to tell a ten year old.

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<v Speaker 2>Boy, yeah that you know can't win.

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<v Speaker 1>But you can't win. I think if that happened today,

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<v Speaker 1>we'd be like, oh, you know what, I'm sorry, you

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<v Speaker 1>know what, Oh you're only ten. I'll tell you what

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<v Speaker 1>you can't really win this contest, but I'm gonna go

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<v Speaker 1>ahead and give it to you anyway, or you know what,

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<v Speaker 1>I get a T shirt and at like something else

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<v Speaker 1>I'm going to send to you. But you know what, really,

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<v Speaker 1>thanks for listening, Carl.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, exactly.

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<v Speaker 1>But the guy was you know, I figured the guy

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<v Speaker 1>was probably a twenty four year old DJ that didn't

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<v Speaker 1>know how to treat a child.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, he's like, sucks to be you, buddy.

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<v Speaker 1>Sorry.

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<v Speaker 2>Bye.

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<v Speaker 1>So we're going back to the origin of this whole conversation.

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<v Speaker 1>Danielle writes in and says, I won pink tickets from

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<v Speaker 1>you guys. My friend, myself, and some random lady. We're

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<v Speaker 1>standing during her songs and a lady near us tapped

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<v Speaker 1>on my leg, saying sit down because the people behind

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<v Speaker 1>us can't see. We ignored him. She tapped my leg again,

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<v Speaker 1>telling us once again to sit down. I don't think

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<v Speaker 1>we were in the wrong, but I'm curious of others' opinions.

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<v Speaker 1>We had a great time. Nonetheless, I don't know. I say,

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<v Speaker 1>you can do whatever you want at a concert, but

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<v Speaker 1>also you get to work in a little courtesy, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>if you really want to stand up. Yes, you paid

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<v Speaker 1>for the tickets. You can stand up, but at the

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<v Speaker 1>same time, if you're the only ones in your sections

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<v Speaker 1>that are standing up, use a little courtesy. You are

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<v Speaker 1>there as a group and there are people behind you.

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<v Speaker 3>It's your favorite song, well.

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<v Speaker 1>Then stand up during your favorite song.

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<v Speaker 2>Sure, sit during a ballot?

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<v Speaker 3>Why do we need a stand during a I feel

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<v Speaker 3>like a Pink concert's pretty energetic throughout most of it.

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<v Speaker 3>I understand she does have some ballads, so there probably

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<v Speaker 3>are a couple times you could sit, but the man

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<v Speaker 3>would I'm standing during a concert type of person like

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<v Speaker 3>Noah CON's not that energetic. We stood almost the entire concert,

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<v Speaker 3>and so did like half our section.

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<v Speaker 2>I think it's definitely different if you're on the floor

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<v Speaker 2>versus if you're on something that's like slanted. Yeah, because

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<v Speaker 2>if you're in slanted you can sit down and still

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<v Speaker 2>see and there's really no reason to stand up, Versus

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<v Speaker 2>if you're on the floor and people are standing around you,

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<v Speaker 2>you have to stand up in order to see.

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<v Speaker 1>Ask yourself and try to think, do you look at

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<v Speaker 1>the artist during the show or do you look at

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<v Speaker 1>the jumbo tron?

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<v Speaker 2>I try see. I always this is like a thing

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<v Speaker 2>I feel because I don't really like concerts in general,

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<v Speaker 2>because I think, Okay, I just listen to this at home,

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<v Speaker 2>especially if I am in nosebleeds, because if I'm just

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<v Speaker 2>looking at a jumbo tron, then I could just be

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<v Speaker 2>looking at footage of this concert versus the actual concert.

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<v Speaker 2>So if I'm going to pay money to go and

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<v Speaker 2>see a concert that like, oh I really love this artist,

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<v Speaker 2>I need to see them in person, I would try

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<v Speaker 2>my best to save up money so that I could

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<v Speaker 2>buy a seat that's closer so I could see them

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<v Speaker 2>in real life versus just look at the jumpo.

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<v Speaker 1>Try I find myself looking at the jumbo tron. I'm

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<v Speaker 1>I don't. I don't dislike concerts. I just don't go

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<v Speaker 1>to that many. And my reason is a lot of

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<v Speaker 1>the time they're on a weeknight. I don't want to

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<v Speaker 1>go on a weeknight. I don't like driving all the

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<v Speaker 1>way to Saint Paul, paying for parking, then parking, then

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<v Speaker 1>walking in, waiting for a shitty opening act, and then

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<v Speaker 1>the regular band comes on late, and then you got

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<v Speaker 1>then you get stuck in traffic, and pretty soon it's

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<v Speaker 1>eleven thirty and I'm just now leaving the venue. So

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<v Speaker 1>I don't really go to a lot of concerts. There

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<v Speaker 1>are some that I would still go to.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm on Wednesday? Are you going to see Lawrence on Wednesday?

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<v Speaker 2>Out last week?

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<v Speaker 1>What are we do again?

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<v Speaker 2>They're kind of like funky sound. They have like a

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<v Speaker 2>new song on the radio.

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<v Speaker 1>RSTI I had them at a band girls n Yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, so it's kind of yeah, funky soul but pop.

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<v Speaker 1>I like that for you. Yeah, good to story.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm excited.

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<v Speaker 1>H Okay, let us know what you think about standing

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<v Speaker 1>up at concerts. Send an email to Ryan Show at

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<v Speaker 1>KADWB dot com. Let's do this. One thought I would

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<v Speaker 1>share a story about when Demi Lovado recorded part of

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<v Speaker 1>her Cool for the Summer music video on Lake Minnetaka.

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<v Speaker 1>I remember this so well. The event was held in

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<v Speaker 1>the courtyard connected to Bayside Grill and Excelsior, which is

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<v Speaker 1>still there, but it's not called Bayside Grill. It's an

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<v Speaker 1>event center and it's right next to Maynards. I was

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<v Speaker 1>a waitress there at the time, and my manager asked

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<v Speaker 1>me in another server to go around and sell prime

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<v Speaker 1>viewing passes for ten dollars cash. Myself and the other

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<v Speaker 1>server quickly realized that the manager was planning to pocket

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<v Speaker 1>the money, so we decided to sell them for twenty

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<v Speaker 1>bucks and keep the additional ten dollars for ourselves. I mean,

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<v Speaker 1>a girl got to pay for college any way she can.

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<v Speaker 1>For context, this was fifty teen ish or more years ago,

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<v Speaker 1>when she had cool for the summer. Fast forward a

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<v Speaker 1>few hours later, very impatient crowd as Demi took forever

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<v Speaker 1>to arrive via jet ski. It was the stupidest thing.

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<v Speaker 2>Out for me, a jet ski.

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<v Speaker 1>It was so stupid because they rode her out. First

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<v Speaker 1>of all, she was not very comfortable on a jet ski.

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<v Speaker 1>They had her try to ride one herself, if I

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<v Speaker 1>remember right, She couldn't do it, so they put her

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<v Speaker 1>on the back of like some person's jet ski. Then

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<v Speaker 1>they rowed her out away from the boat the dock,

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<v Speaker 1>and then they had her come back in several times

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<v Speaker 1>so she would jauntily jump off the jet ski and

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<v Speaker 1>run down the dock, run up on the stage and sing. Well,

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<v Speaker 1>it took a few takes to do it, and it

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<v Speaker 1>took for fucking ever. She quickly performed for about fifteen minutes,

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<v Speaker 1>then was whisked away for a private meet and greet

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<v Speaker 1>hosted by Katie WB at the events center upstairs. Well,

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<v Speaker 1>I suddenly have a swarm of angry mothers, crying, teeny

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<v Speaker 1>boppers and sad, drunk college girls saying I was promised

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<v Speaker 1>that I would get prime viewing because I paid twenty

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<v Speaker 1>dollars for it. Can't blame them. Come to find out,

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<v Speaker 1>the other waitress was claiming that they were not only

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<v Speaker 1>great viewing spots, but you would also get to go

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<v Speaker 1>to the meet and greet. I had no idea. She

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<v Speaker 1>was saying that, I don't exactly remember what happened at

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<v Speaker 1>the end is it truly was not my fault, but

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<v Speaker 1>I ended up pocketing an additional two hundred bucks or

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<v Speaker 1>so for selling fake prime viewing thep meet and greets. Anyway,

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<v Speaker 1>just another fun memory, and I figured you might enjoy

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<v Speaker 1>hearing another side of that stupid music video filming staff

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<v Speaker 1>writer Nicole I didn't know about that at all.

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<v Speaker 2>I've not yet. I've definitely never heard a story like that.

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<v Speaker 1>But that was I mean, it was kind of a

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<v Speaker 1>cool event. She was kind of like at the top

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<v Speaker 1>of her game back then, and it was kind of cool.

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<v Speaker 1>But she did keep everybody waiting while she wrote up

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<v Speaker 1>on the jet skiing.

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<v Speaker 2>Sure, is Nicole admitting to an ethical crime here? Yeah?

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<v Speaker 1>Apparently so again out Yeah, but as fifteen years ago,

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<v Speaker 1>so the statute limitations fired. Yeah, she's just fine, all right?

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<v Speaker 1>Continuing on with the Minnesota goodbye. Let me open up

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<v Speaker 1>my tab again here. This is interesting and they talk

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<v Speaker 1>about a couple of things. Fishing trips in elementary school.

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<v Speaker 1>They went to Rice Lake in Maple Grove, and they

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<v Speaker 1>said that they brought their own rod and gear with

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<v Speaker 1>and on my very first cast, my entire line unraveled

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<v Speaker 1>out of my reel went sailing into the lake, along

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<v Speaker 1>with the lure that I had borrowed from my brother.

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<v Speaker 1>So my fishing trip turned into a day at the lake. Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>that's cute. Another random thing about school that popped into

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<v Speaker 1>my mind. Who else remembers doing the Pledge of allegiance

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<v Speaker 1>every single day at the start of the school day. Yes,

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<v Speaker 1>did you, Bailey? Jenny? Did you? Yeah? We did too.

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<v Speaker 1>Did they not do it anymore?

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<v Speaker 2>I don't know. I think because I have worked in

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<v Speaker 2>schools in the last like ten years, and I feel

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<v Speaker 2>like they would they do the pledge of allegiance maybe

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<v Speaker 2>on Monday, like they do it one time on Monday

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<v Speaker 2>and then not again. But we see it every single day.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, we did too. Yeah, And it's interesting because if

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<v Speaker 1>you ever sit down and we did this somewhere in school,

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<v Speaker 1>to go line by line through the pledge of allegiance

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<v Speaker 1>to realize what you're doing. I pledge allegiance to the flag.

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<v Speaker 1>So you're pledging allegiance to the flag of the United

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<v Speaker 1>States of America and to the Republic for which it

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<v Speaker 1>stands semi colon, one nation under God, Comma indivisible. So

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<v Speaker 1>in other words, you can't split up states with liberty

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<v Speaker 1>and justice for all. So you say this out of

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<v Speaker 1>wrote memory when you're in third grade, but you don't

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<v Speaker 1>have any idea what you're saying. Really, it just like.

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<v Speaker 2>I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States

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<v Speaker 2>of America.

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<v Speaker 1>Like you not put any robotic because you don't understand

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<v Speaker 1>what you're doing anyway, So they say why they always

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<v Speaker 1>said it was felt very culty to have my children

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<v Speaker 1>pledging their allegiance to the country and saying words they

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<v Speaker 1>don't even understand. Okay, not a bad point, but I

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<v Speaker 1>think that's maybe the responsibility of a teacher to, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>to do a lesson like hey, here's what you guys

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<v Speaker 1>are doing. You're not just reciting like the Lord's prayer,

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<v Speaker 1>Our Father, who out and who are in heaven, how

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<v Speaker 1>it would be thy name like Kingdom. Come, I will

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<v Speaker 1>be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give

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<v Speaker 1>us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our debts,

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<v Speaker 1>as we forgive our debtors, or forgive us our trespasses,

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<v Speaker 1>as we forgive those who trespass.

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<v Speaker 2>Against us our sins, as and forgive those who against us.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, right, there's a several different versions. We came from

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<v Speaker 1>an unusual church. Yeah, our church. Oh no, no, no,

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<v Speaker 1>our church was well. We believe that Jesus died in

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<v Speaker 1>an ATV accident, at accident an ATV. Are you wearing

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<v Speaker 1>a helmet? No, he was not wearing a helmet. Went

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<v Speaker 1>over a sand.

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<v Speaker 3>Dune, a sand dune. Did you find that out? Was

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<v Speaker 3>it like petroglyphs or something like that.

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<v Speaker 1>Pet petrock glyph three twenty Yeah. The problem is you

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<v Speaker 1>believe you believe me for a minute, you did believe that.

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<v Speaker 1>You know, when you're setting we're to play a game

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<v Speaker 1>called the Books of the Bible game. Okay, first one

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<v Speaker 1>to drop out loses go around clockwise Genesis, John, Matthew, Mark, Ruth,

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<v Speaker 1>you're out, okay, Jenny is between you and me?

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<v Speaker 3>Collations?

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<v Speaker 1>No, No, that's a good one. That okay, I'll go Proverbs.

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<v Speaker 2>I have Luke. Did you someone say.

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<v Speaker 1>Where you said?

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<v Speaker 2>Luke?

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<v Speaker 1>You're out? Okay?

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<v Speaker 3>I think I'm out.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, you you're already out. I was going to cap

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<v Speaker 1>it off with Ruth.

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<v Speaker 2>I didn't realized we were going to be doing this game.

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<v Speaker 1>Nobody.

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<v Speaker 2>She already said get out of here.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay. Well then I lose.

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<v Speaker 3>Okay, Well, no I lost first.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, you did win.

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<v Speaker 3>Congratulations, you're the most Christian in the group.

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<v Speaker 1>Now your heads, head about your heads. Heavenly Father, please

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<v Speaker 1>forgive these two heathens for not knowing your Holy book,

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<v Speaker 1>the Word of the Lord John three point sixteen. For

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<v Speaker 1>God forgave his only son and send him to earth

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<v Speaker 1>to bless all the people.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't know if that's okay?

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<v Speaker 1>Can I get an amen?

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<v Speaker 2>Amen?

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<v Speaker 1>Now here's the funny thing. People will be like, you're

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<v Speaker 1>mocking religion. Not at all. I really, you know, because

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<v Speaker 1>I think if I'm going to fall into any division

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<v Speaker 1>of religion, I'm a Christian, but not a practicing Christian.

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<v Speaker 1>But definitely a respectful Christian. But I really believe God

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<v Speaker 1>gifted us with a couple of wonderful things. Sex, horniness,

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<v Speaker 1>and a sense of humor. Don't you think that those

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<v Speaker 1>were gifts from gods? Because sex doesn't you know, in

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<v Speaker 1>the terms of biological recreation, we don't have to have orgasms.

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<v Speaker 1>But God gave us orgasms to make it a whole

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<v Speaker 1>lot more fun. God's like, damn, these people need a

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<v Speaker 1>good orgasm.

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<v Speaker 2>I love that.

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<v Speaker 1>I also chicken nachos. I love chicken all.

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<v Speaker 3>No, No, that's actually a sin that God made chicken nachos.

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<v Speaker 1>It should only be pork beef.

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<v Speaker 3>Or yes, porker beef.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, the devil made chicken nachos.

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<v Speaker 1>The devil made That's the name of the episode, The

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<v Speaker 1>Devil made chicken nachos.

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<v Speaker 2>Petro.

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<v Speaker 1>So, no, when when we make jokes about religion, like

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<v Speaker 1>Jesus died in an ATV accident, some people get mad because,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, if you're really hardcore, you know what, Yeah,

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00:18:27.519 --> 00:18:30.359
<v Speaker 1>that is a little bit disrespectful. But I truly believe

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<v Speaker 1>that God gave us a rich sense of humor.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I know, I know that Jesus didn't die in

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<v Speaker 2>an atv accident.

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<v Speaker 1>He died and when he slipped in the tub.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh okay, yeah, lifelink wasn't around back then.

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<v Speaker 1>No, he didn't have one of those life at.

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<v Speaker 2>Lifeinth something too.

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<v Speaker 1>Do you know the baseball is mentioned in the Bible

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<v Speaker 1>in the Book of Genesis really? Yeah, in the big inning.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, in the big inning.

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<v Speaker 1>Thank you, Jenny. Don't you know the first of the Bible?

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<v Speaker 1>Do you know the first line of the Bible? You

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<v Speaker 1>fucking heathen? In the beginning, God created the heavens and

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<v Speaker 1>the earth.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>I like. So anyway, don't get mad at us for,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, for jokes that are about religion, because I

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<v Speaker 1>think that I've made my point.

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<v Speaker 2>We all have our favorites, you know. Scripture what Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>do you have your favorite scripture? David?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I would say the twenty third Psalm?

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<v Speaker 2>What is that one?

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<v Speaker 1>The Lord is my shepherd. I shall not want And

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<v Speaker 1>basically it's reassuring that you know, no matter what kind

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<v Speaker 1>of awful things you're going through, you God has got you.

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<v Speaker 1>He's right there. He's your shepherd. The Lord is my shepherd.

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<v Speaker 1>The only thing is it's like, it's not true if

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<v Speaker 1>I'm dying out of heat exhaustion in the Grand Canyon.

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<v Speaker 1>The Lord is not there to bring me, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>an aquafina. Okay, you know what I mean. So the

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<v Speaker 1>Lord might be my shepherd, and it's very reassuring, but

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<v Speaker 1>I think at the same time, the Lord's like, get

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<v Speaker 1>off your ass. There's a parable. Do you want to

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<v Speaker 1>hear a parable?

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<v Speaker 2>Sure?

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<v Speaker 1>So a guy is it's in a flood. He's in

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<v Speaker 1>a flood. He's on the roof of his house. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>and there's floodwaters all around him. A guy comes up

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<v Speaker 1>in canoe and he says, I want to save you.

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<v Speaker 1>Get in the canoe and the guy's like, no, no, no,

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<v Speaker 1>the Lord will save me. So the guy in the

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<v Speaker 1>canoe paddles away. Guy still on the roof. Floodwaters are rising.

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<v Speaker 1>A guy comes by in a rowboat. He's like, oh

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<v Speaker 1>my god, I'm here. I'm gonna save you. Get in

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<v Speaker 1>the rowboat and the guy said, no, no, no, I'm going

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<v Speaker 1>to wait for the Lord to save me. The guy's like, okay, fuck.

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<v Speaker 1>He paddles off. Helicopter comes by, hovers by the roof,

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<v Speaker 1>says hey, we want to save you. Climb up the ladder,

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<v Speaker 1>get in the helicopter, and the guy said, I'm waiting

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<v Speaker 1>for the Lord to save me, and so the helicopter

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<v Speaker 1>flies off. The guy waters rise, he drowns, he dies,

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<v Speaker 1>He goes up to the pearly gates and he's like, God,

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<v Speaker 1>I thought that you said that you would, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>save me. You're always with me, And God's like, you're

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<v Speaker 1>a dumb ass. I sent a canoe, I sent a

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<v Speaker 1>row bo I send a helicopter, you stupid fuck WHOA.

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<v Speaker 1>Now that's not a biblical quote because there's no paraphrasing. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 1>but my point is, you know, as I walk through

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<v Speaker 1>this valley of the shadow of death, I will fear

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<v Speaker 1>no evil for thou art with me. So I think

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<v Speaker 1>that God, yeah, he might be with you, but you

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<v Speaker 1>got to get off your ass and work on it yourself.

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<v Speaker 1>Believe No, I don't think that's that's not my bee.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't think you were not listening God. No, You've

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<v Speaker 1>got to take action for yourself. Like it's like God,

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<v Speaker 1>I want you to help me lose weight. Well, God's

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<v Speaker 1>not going to sit there and like wave his wand

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<v Speaker 1>and make you lose weight. But God might say, well, listen,

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<v Speaker 1>I I you know what, you just got a bonus.

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<v Speaker 1>Maybe you should join Livia Weight Control Centers.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, he'll give you the wherewithal to go make it happen.

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<v Speaker 1>Well said, thank you for putting a cap on it.

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<v Speaker 1>The God will give you the wear for the ball.

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<v Speaker 1>But sometimes you got to look for it. Jenny, you

477
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<v Speaker 1>gotta fucking look around, Jenny.

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<v Speaker 2>Jenny's like the Lord. Lord.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, there's an awkward silence or I don't know what's saying.

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<v Speaker 3>Why has it always got to be me because you

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<v Speaker 3>always in the podcast?

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<v Speaker 2>Can I tell you my favorite scripture we can be done? Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>it's Matthew five fourteen. You are the light of the world.

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<v Speaker 2>A city set on a hill cannot be hidden, means

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<v Speaker 2>don't don't you know hide your light? Be the biggest

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<v Speaker 2>light you can be.

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<v Speaker 1>So we are the light of the world, like the

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<v Speaker 1>person is the light of the world.

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<v Speaker 2>Though, Okay, a city set on a hill cannot be hidden.

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<v Speaker 2>So you put your city up on a hill because

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<v Speaker 2>you're the light of the world.

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<v Speaker 1>David Okay. I also liked a rich man has as

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<v Speaker 1>much chance of getting into heaven as a camel passing

494
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<v Speaker 1>through the eye of a needle, And I thought that

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<v Speaker 1>was really interesting. I think then and then Jesus also

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<v Speaker 1>said the poor will always be among us. In other words,

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<v Speaker 1>it doesn't matter what kind of shit that like. Politicians

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<v Speaker 1>will tell you, there will always be poor people. How

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<v Speaker 1>do I know, Jesus told me. I also know this one.

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<v Speaker 1>Jesus loves me. This I know, for the Bible told

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<v Speaker 1>me so little ones to he belong. They are weak,

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<v Speaker 1>but he is strong. Yes, Jesus. Hey, that is the

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<v Speaker 1>most biblical, Minnesota good Bible.

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<v Speaker 2>Probably Amen. Amen,
