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<v Speaker 1>And welcome to fifty five Carsy Morning Show. Maryon Ben's,

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<v Speaker 1>who is a we'll still call her a local author.

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<v Speaker 1>We won't hold it against HER's of Cincinnaia native, but

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<v Speaker 1>she did move to Atlanta in the nineties with her

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<v Speaker 1>husband and family. But she is a local author, and

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<v Speaker 1>she wrote a book. It's called You Were Still Dancing,

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<v Speaker 1>The Unforgettable Journey through Alzheimer's. Marion Ben's, welcome to the

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<v Speaker 1>Morning Show. It's great to have you on my program.

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<v Speaker 2>Thanks Brian, and I appreciate the introduction.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, you're more than welcome. I just give my little

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<v Speaker 1>readers a foundation so they know it's a local author.

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<v Speaker 1>I like to support local authors. I think it's really

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<v Speaker 1>kind of neat that we've gotten them in the audience

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<v Speaker 1>because there's some really talented folks out there. But your

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<v Speaker 1>book about Alzheimer's and Sadly you were. How old were

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<v Speaker 1>you when your grandmother experiences the challenge presented by Alzheimer's.

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<v Speaker 2>I was probably sixteen, mid teens. I would say I

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<v Speaker 2>was still living at home and my grandmother. When my

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<v Speaker 2>grandmother was diagnosed, she came to live with my family.

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<v Speaker 2>At that time, there were six kids in a time,

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<v Speaker 2>there were just two of us left, myself and my

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<v Speaker 2>brother Kevin, so Maul moved in. They looked at nursing

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<v Speaker 2>homes and small, small family homes my mom and her sister,

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<v Speaker 2>but they just couldn't come to an agreement on where

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<v Speaker 2>to leave her, and my mom just she wanted her

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<v Speaker 2>with us, so my grandmother moved in.

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<v Speaker 1>Well. Having lived through this with my father struggling with

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<v Speaker 1>Alzheimer's dimension, I ultimately ended his life the challenges presented

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<v Speaker 1>by having to care for a loved one, and not

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<v Speaker 1>just the emotional component, which is obviously overwhelming, but my

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<v Speaker 1>mom was just run down to the point of exhaustion

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<v Speaker 1>because you know, it's a literal twenty four hour day,

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<v Speaker 1>seven day a week proposition dealing with the challenges these

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<v Speaker 1>folks struggle with.

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<v Speaker 2>Right, you know, And that was my mom was also

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<v Speaker 2>work in part time, you know. I remember I was

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<v Speaker 2>in my summers, I was a cam counselor. And during

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<v Speaker 2>one of these years that my grandma was with us,

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<v Speaker 2>I came back in the fall and my mom had

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<v Speaker 2>aged overnight, and it was so dramatic for me and

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<v Speaker 2>traumatic to see that just in the short ten weeks

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<v Speaker 2>when I was gone, how much she had changed. And

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<v Speaker 2>you don't realize that I wasn't the primary caregiver. You know,

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<v Speaker 2>I was witnessing what was going on, but you don't

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<v Speaker 2>take the full blunt of caregiving as a teenager, even

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<v Speaker 2>even I would help mom, or we would sit my

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<v Speaker 2>brother and I would sit with mal so Mom and

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<v Speaker 2>Dad could go out. But it is absolutely a life

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<v Speaker 2>changing aging process for the caregiver. And you know that's

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<v Speaker 2>why I, you know, encourage people who talk to me

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<v Speaker 2>who are going through it to basically to take your

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<v Speaker 2>oxygen first, to take care of yourself, to make sure

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<v Speaker 2>that you're eating right. You know, of all the research

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<v Speaker 2>I did for this book, it's the Mediterranean diet is

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<v Speaker 2>the one diet that just kept popping up, kind of

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<v Speaker 2>went to the top of diets for people, not just

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<v Speaker 2>to prevent Alzheimer's, but just to lead a healthier lifestyle.

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<v Speaker 2>And that's one of the things that you know I

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<v Speaker 2>would recommend, but sleep, exercise, and then some form of

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<v Speaker 2>just clearing your mind. I meditated, you know, And another

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<v Speaker 2>really important thing is just taking people up on it,

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<v Speaker 2>on the offer to sit with your loved one or

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<v Speaker 2>finding someone who will sitting with their life, or paying

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<v Speaker 2>someone just sit with your life, because you need to

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<v Speaker 2>get away. You need to just step back from it.

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<v Speaker 2>And even if you're just going outside and taking a

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<v Speaker 2>small walk and just breathing the fresh air, but it's

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<v Speaker 2>all encompassing.

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<v Speaker 1>Mary and Ben's author of You were still dancing. This

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<v Speaker 1>Alzheimer's situation, though, developed further because once your grandmother, I

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<v Speaker 1>guess it was it after she passed that your mother

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<v Speaker 1>came down with the symptoms of Alzheimer's.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, yes, my grandmother passed, and you know it was

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<v Speaker 2>it was another I would say fifteen twenty years when

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<v Speaker 2>Mom started showing the signs, but she actually you know,

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<v Speaker 2>Alzheimer's is now known to begin in the brain twenty

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<v Speaker 2>you know, two decades before the symptoms first appear. So

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<v Speaker 2>while we're out living our lives, there's a lot going

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<v Speaker 2>on inside our head that you know, we don't know

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<v Speaker 2>about now. Now, there is early testing if you're brave

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<v Speaker 2>enough to do it, and I haven't done that yet,

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<v Speaker 2>but I have friends that have, and I think you

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<v Speaker 2>really have to be careful to make sure that you

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<v Speaker 2>have the personality that can handle that. Maybe you have

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<v Speaker 2>an increased risk of developing Alzheimer's. I know myself if

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<v Speaker 2>if I forgot a word, which I sometimes do, Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>the first place to know is I'm getting Alzheimer's, and

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<v Speaker 2>just advantage that might follow out.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, Benz, I have the exact same reaction.

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<v Speaker 2>You know.

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<v Speaker 1>I'll be sixty in September and I like to just

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<v Speaker 1>pass it. I was like, jeez, Frian, you're getting old.

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<v Speaker 1>You're just not as sharp as you used to be.

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<v Speaker 1>And I'm struggling to find a word. But then again,

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<v Speaker 1>I immediately think of my father, and it's unsettling, to

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<v Speaker 1>say the least. So it is good, no, no, go.

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<v Speaker 2>Ahead in the absence of a cure, and there is

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<v Speaker 2>none right now that I think you really have to

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<v Speaker 2>weigh whether you can handle knowing that you have a

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<v Speaker 2>greater chance now. Of course you can go back to

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<v Speaker 2>all the things what do I need to do to

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<v Speaker 2>prevent it? But you still have to know if you

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<v Speaker 2>have the mindset that can you know, not go had

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<v Speaker 2>turled places whenever you know we're my keys, or you know,

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<v Speaker 2>you walk into a room and what did I come

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<v Speaker 2>in here for? And I think that we all do

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<v Speaker 2>it to some extent. So when you have a history

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<v Speaker 2>in your family. It's easy to go there, and then

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<v Speaker 2>it's easy to kind of become consumed bias. Yeah, that's

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<v Speaker 2>the you know, just to try to not go there.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah. Actually, I can see it bringing on full blown

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<v Speaker 1>depression if you, I mean, if you, if you're dwelling

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<v Speaker 1>on it enough. It's just it's terrib because the disease

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<v Speaker 1>is insidious. I mean it, I actually and I don't

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<v Speaker 1>know what that sounded like disrespect for my dad or

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<v Speaker 1>that I was happy he died, but what a weight

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<v Speaker 1>was looked that he was miserable, He didn't know who

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<v Speaker 1>anybody was. He laid in his bed and had no function,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, no control over his bowels, which is obviously

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<v Speaker 1>a common problem in these situations, which is one of

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<v Speaker 1>the reasons why you're tending to someone twenty four to seven. Uh,

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<v Speaker 1>it's it's just he I knew he was in a

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<v Speaker 1>better place, that he was released.

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<v Speaker 2>Right exactly. And and I believe that's the word. And

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<v Speaker 2>that's how I thought my grandmother. I felt like she

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<v Speaker 2>was just let go, she was released. And I think

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<v Speaker 2>that's just such a nice way to look at it.

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<v Speaker 2>And it really helps if you, if you it depends

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<v Speaker 2>on you know where you come from spiritually. But but

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<v Speaker 2>if you do believe that we are you know, we

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<v Speaker 2>are our soul, encompasses, are body or however you look

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<v Speaker 2>at it, you know, to be released from those chains,

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<v Speaker 2>and they really do hold you down when you have

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<v Speaker 2>a disease such as Alzheimer's.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, if you're faced with Alzheimer's in your family, what

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<v Speaker 1>having lived this now two times, you obviously saw it all,

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<v Speaker 1>how do you what do you recommend people to do

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<v Speaker 1>in terms of dealing with this challenge and maintain some

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<v Speaker 1>sort of I know you mentioned the exercise and taking

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<v Speaker 1>walks and all that related to caregiving, because it is exhausting,

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<v Speaker 1>But what about just coping with the general reality that

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<v Speaker 1>they're living with.

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<v Speaker 2>What are your recommendations the reality that that the caregiver

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<v Speaker 2>lives with or the reality that the patient lives with.

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<v Speaker 1>No the caregiver. I was thinking more of the caregiver,

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<v Speaker 1>because quite often the patient themselves loses any sense of

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<v Speaker 1>recollection or even ability to recognize you as a as

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<v Speaker 1>a relative, right, you know.

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<v Speaker 2>So for myself personally, I do and I think about

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<v Speaker 2>it every day. That's the first thing. I Alzheimer's is

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<v Speaker 2>no more than a couple of degrees away from you know,

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<v Speaker 2>my thought process wherever I am. I do believe strongly

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<v Speaker 2>in a one meditation. I know I spoke with that earlier,

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<v Speaker 2>but I can't emphasize that enough to even go into

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<v Speaker 2>like a deep breathing clearing your mind, just kind of

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<v Speaker 2>setting the tone for the day as you you know,

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<v Speaker 2>get I believe that I always start my day with exercise,

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<v Speaker 2>some form of yoga, some form of our Wilbek exercise,

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<v Speaker 2>and just try to, you know, give my body the

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<v Speaker 2>best chance I can to keep from you know, the

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<v Speaker 2>problem with Alzheimer's, it's not a problem. The issue with

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<v Speaker 2>Alzheimer's is that Alzheimer's is very much like any other

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<v Speaker 2>disease that affects the heart right. So if you have

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<v Speaker 2>high blood pressure, if you have high cholesterol, those those

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<v Speaker 2>need to be recognized and then they need to be

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<v Speaker 2>taken care of broad under control, whatever means that is.

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<v Speaker 2>I am on a satin I you know, I don't

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<v Speaker 2>feel like I should be out of statins because I'm

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<v Speaker 2>in state, and I eat right, and I exercise and

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<v Speaker 2>I try to do all the right things. But apparently

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<v Speaker 2>genetically I'm predisposed to having high cholesterol. You tried my

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<v Speaker 2>doctors ride to you know, do it you know with diet,

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<v Speaker 2>do it with exercise. He gave me a lot of time.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, let me strongly encourage you to look into bioidentical

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<v Speaker 1>hormone replacement therapy, which is what the Europeans do to

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<v Speaker 1>solve the cholesterol problem. Plus it really makes you feel good,

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<v Speaker 1>I mean really good. So Okay, bioidentical hormone replacement therapy.

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<v Speaker 1>You may your hormones could be out of balance, low estrogen,

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<v Speaker 1>low tester and whatever, what testoster, whatever happens to be.

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<v Speaker 1>But if you do some research on it, they don't

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<v Speaker 1>use statins in Europe from what I've been told by

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<v Speaker 1>physicians that I deal with. So just a thought, but

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<v Speaker 1>it also deals with a whole bunch of other problems,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, metapausal problems and you know, sexual desire, and uh,

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<v Speaker 1>I just it's it's it's kind of magical, if I

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<v Speaker 1>may be so bold as to say so, Marion Ben's Now,

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<v Speaker 1>I guess this book is recommended for anybody who is

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<v Speaker 1>dealing with the realities of Alzheimer's. Anybody who's got a

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<v Speaker 1>family member or a loved one or a friend who's

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<v Speaker 1>struggling with the disease, thoughts, comments, and how to deal

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<v Speaker 1>and cope with it all In the book, you were

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<v Speaker 1>Still Dancing, an unforgettable journey through Alzheimer's. By our Still,

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<v Speaker 1>we'll call her local author Mary and Ben's Marian. Thanks

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<v Speaker 1>for putting this down And I checked on Amazon. Everybody

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<v Speaker 1>loves it. You got a five star review there and

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<v Speaker 1>it came out June of last year. So I people

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<v Speaker 1>can get a copy of your book on my blog

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<v Speaker 1>page at fifty five krs dot com and I'll encourage

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<v Speaker 1>them to do that.

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<v Speaker 2>I really appreciate that, and I do think it's very

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<v Speaker 2>for her going to say.

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<v Speaker 1>The process, yeah, and prayers to everybody who has to

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<v Speaker 1>deal with it. It's not a fun process. Mary, and

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<v Speaker 1>you have a wonderful Valentine's Day and a great weekend.

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<v Speaker 1>And I'll encourage my listeners to pick up a copy

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<v Speaker 1>of your book over my blog page fifty five krs

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<v Speaker 1>dot com. Take care and thanks for your time this morning.