WEBVTT 1 00:00:02.160 --> 00:00:05.759 Chapter ten of They and I by Jerome K. Jerome. 2 00:00:06.280 --> 00:00:09.880 This LibriVox recording is in the public domain. Recording by 3 00:00:09.880 --> 00:00:14.679 debreel Inn They and I by Jerome K. Jerome. Chapter ten. 4 00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:19.640 She's a good woman, said Robina. Who's a good woman, 5 00:00:19.719 --> 00:00:23.600 I asked, he's trying, I expect, although he is an 6 00:00:23.600 --> 00:00:27.440 old deer to live with. I mean, continued Robina, addressing 7 00:00:27.480 --> 00:00:30.600 apparently the rising moon. And then there are all those 8 00:00:30.719 --> 00:00:34.479 children you are thinking of, missus Saint Leonard. I suggested, 9 00:00:35.759 --> 00:00:39.079 there seems no way of making her happy, explained Robina. 10 00:00:39.280 --> 00:00:41.359 On Thursday, I went round early in the morning to 11 00:00:41.399 --> 00:00:44.399 help Janie pack the baskets for the picnic. It was 12 00:00:44.439 --> 00:00:48.280 her own idea the picnic. Speaking of picnics, I said, 13 00:00:48.759 --> 00:00:50.840 you might have thought, went on Robina, that she was 14 00:00:50.920 --> 00:00:53.840 dressing for her own funeral. She said she knew she 15 00:00:53.920 --> 00:00:55.759 was going to catch her death of cold. Sitting on 16 00:00:55.799 --> 00:00:59.399 the wet grass. Something told her. I reminded her it 17 00:00:59.439 --> 00:01:01.799 hadn't rained for three weeks, and that everything was as 18 00:01:01.880 --> 00:01:04.319 dry as a bone. But she said that made no 19 00:01:04.359 --> 00:01:07.120 difference to grass. There was always a moisture in grass, 20 00:01:07.159 --> 00:01:09.480 and that cushions and all that only helped to draw 21 00:01:09.519 --> 00:01:12.359 it out, not that it mattered. The end had to come, 22 00:01:12.400 --> 00:01:14.439 and so long as the others were happy. You know 23 00:01:14.560 --> 00:01:17.879 her style, nobody ever thought of her. She was to 24 00:01:17.920 --> 00:01:21.280 be dragged here, dragged there. She talked about herself as 25 00:01:21.280 --> 00:01:23.920 if she were some sacred image. It got upon my 26 00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:26.599 nerves at last, so that I persuaded Janie to let 27 00:01:26.599 --> 00:01:29.159 me offer to stop at home with her. I wasn't 28 00:01:29.200 --> 00:01:32.799 too keen about going myself. Not by that time, when 29 00:01:32.799 --> 00:01:36.040 our desires leave us, says rouchef called. I remarked, we 30 00:01:36.159 --> 00:01:40.159 pride ourselves upon our virtue in having overcome them. Well, 31 00:01:40.200 --> 00:01:43.000 it was her fault, anyhow, retorted Robin, and I didn't 32 00:01:43.040 --> 00:01:45.000 make a virtue of it. I told her I'd just 33 00:01:45.040 --> 00:01:46.840 as soon not go, and that I felt sure the 34 00:01:46.879 --> 00:01:48.959 others would be all right without her, so that there 35 00:01:49.000 --> 00:01:51.040 was no need for her to be dragged anywhere. And 36 00:01:51.079 --> 00:01:55.040 then she burst into tears. She said, I suggested that 37 00:01:55.120 --> 00:01:56.799 it was hard on her to have children who could 38 00:01:56.799 --> 00:01:58.480 wish to go to a picnic and leave their mother 39 00:01:58.519 --> 00:02:01.120 at home. That it was little and enjoyment she had 40 00:02:01.120 --> 00:02:03.400 in her life. Heaven knows that if there was one 41 00:02:03.400 --> 00:02:05.239 thing she had been looking forward to, it was this 42 00:02:05.319 --> 00:02:08.039 day's outing. But still, of course, if everybody would be 43 00:02:08.039 --> 00:02:12.199 happier without her something of the sort, admitted Robina. Only 44 00:02:12.240 --> 00:02:14.680 there was a lot of it. We had to all 45 00:02:14.759 --> 00:02:16.840 fuss round her and swear that without her it wouldn't 46 00:02:16.879 --> 00:02:19.520 be worth calling a picnic. She brightened up. On the 47 00:02:19.520 --> 00:02:23.120 way home. The screech owl in the yew tree emitted 48 00:02:23.159 --> 00:02:26.639 a blood curdling scream. He purchased there each evening, on 49 00:02:26.719 --> 00:02:30.560 the extreme end of the longest bow, dimly outlined against 50 00:02:30.560 --> 00:02:33.319 the night. He has the appearance of a friendly hobgoblin. 51 00:02:33.719 --> 00:02:36.120 But I wish he didn't fancy himself as a vocalist. 52 00:02:36.520 --> 00:02:38.840 It is against his own interests. I am sure if 53 00:02:38.840 --> 00:02:42.199 he only knew it, that American college yell of his 54 00:02:42.479 --> 00:02:44.680 must have the effect of sending every living thing within 55 00:02:44.719 --> 00:02:47.719 half a mile back into its hole. Maybe it is 56 00:02:47.759 --> 00:02:50.479 a provision of nature for clearing off the very old 57 00:02:50.560 --> 00:02:53.000 mice who had become stone deaf and would otherwise be 58 00:02:53.000 --> 00:02:56.680 a burden on their relatives. The others, unless out for suicide. 59 00:02:56.759 --> 00:03:01.039 Must one things be tolerably safe. Ethel Bertha is persuaded 60 00:03:01.080 --> 00:03:03.439 he is a sign of death. But seeing there isn't 61 00:03:03.439 --> 00:03:05.759 a square quarter of a mile in this county without 62 00:03:05.759 --> 00:03:08.520 its screech owl. There can hardly, by this time be 63 00:03:08.560 --> 00:03:12.120 a resident that an assurance society would look at. Veronica 64 00:03:12.319 --> 00:03:15.439 likes him. She even likes his screech. I found her 65 00:03:15.560 --> 00:03:17.719 under the tree the other night, wrapped up in a shawl, 66 00:03:17.800 --> 00:03:20.159 trying to learn it, as if one of them were 67 00:03:20.199 --> 00:03:23.680 not enough. It may be quite cross with her. Besides, 68 00:03:23.719 --> 00:03:25.599 it wasn't a bit like it, as I told her. 69 00:03:26.120 --> 00:03:28.240 She said, it was better than I could do anyhow, 70 00:03:28.400 --> 00:03:30.759 and I was idiot enough to take up the challenge. 71 00:03:31.000 --> 00:03:33.039 It makes me angry now when I think of it, 72 00:03:33.280 --> 00:03:36.560 a respectable middle aged literary man standing under a yew 73 00:03:36.680 --> 00:03:39.639 tree trying to screech like an owl, and the bird 74 00:03:39.719 --> 00:03:43.520 was silly enough to encourage us. She was a charming girl, 75 00:03:43.680 --> 00:03:46.319 I said seven and twenty years ago when Saint Leonard 76 00:03:46.400 --> 00:03:49.319 fell in love with her. She had those dark, dreamy eyes, 77 00:03:49.439 --> 00:03:52.800 so suggestive of veiled mysteries, and her lips must have 78 00:03:52.879 --> 00:03:55.960 looked bewitching when they powdered, I expect they often did. 79 00:03:56.800 --> 00:03:59.439 They do so still, But the powatable woman of forty 80 00:03:59.439 --> 00:04:02.479 six no long longer fascinates to a pretty girl of 81 00:04:02.560 --> 00:04:07.479 nineteen a spice of temper and illogical unreasonableness. Our added attractions, 82 00:04:07.960 --> 00:04:10.280 the scratch of a blue eyed kitten only tempts us 83 00:04:10.319 --> 00:04:14.000 to tease her. The more young Hubert Saint Leonard, he 84 00:04:14.039 --> 00:04:16.639 had curly brown hair with a pretty trick of blushing, 85 00:04:16.680 --> 00:04:19.839 and was going to conquer the world, found her fretfulness, 86 00:04:19.839 --> 00:04:23.639 her very selfishness adorable, and told her so. Kneeling before her, 87 00:04:23.680 --> 00:04:27.800 gazing into her bewildering eyes only he called it her waywardness, 88 00:04:27.839 --> 00:04:31.560 her imperiousness, begged her for his sake to be more capricious, 89 00:04:31.920 --> 00:04:35.120 told her how beautiful she looked when displeased, So no 90 00:04:35.199 --> 00:04:39.000 doubt she did at nineteen. He didn't tell you all that, did, 91 00:04:39.040 --> 00:04:43.879 he demanded, robinon Not a word I reassured her, except 92 00:04:43.879 --> 00:04:46.120 that she was acknowledged by all authorities to have been 93 00:04:46.160 --> 00:04:48.879 the most beautiful girl in Tunbridge Wells, and that her 94 00:04:48.879 --> 00:04:52.319 father had been ruined by a rascally solicitor. No, I 95 00:04:52.439 --> 00:04:55.639 was merely, to use the phrase of the French police courts, 96 00:04:55.680 --> 00:05:00.199 reconstructing the crime. It may be all wrong, grumbled Robin. Huh, 97 00:05:00.920 --> 00:05:03.519 it may be, I agreed, but why does it strike 98 00:05:03.560 --> 00:05:06.839 you as improbable? We were sitting in the porch waiting 99 00:05:06.839 --> 00:05:10.519 for Dick to come by the white path across the field. No, 100 00:05:10.959 --> 00:05:14.160 answered Robin. It all sounds very probable. I wish it didn't. 101 00:05:14.879 --> 00:05:17.800 You must remember, I continued, that I am an old playgoer. 102 00:05:18.319 --> 00:05:20.839 I have set out so many of this world's dramas 103 00:05:20.879 --> 00:05:23.639 it is as easy to reconstruct them backwards as forwards. 104 00:05:24.160 --> 00:05:27.040 We are witnessing the last act of the Saint Leonard drama, 105 00:05:27.399 --> 00:05:30.720 that unsatisfactory last act that merely fills out time after 106 00:05:30.720 --> 00:05:34.759 the play has ended. The intermediate acts were probably more exciting, 107 00:05:35.079 --> 00:05:39.120 containing passionate scenes played with much earnestness, chiefly for the 108 00:05:39.160 --> 00:05:42.120 amusement of the servants. But the first act, with the 109 00:05:42.199 --> 00:05:45.800 Kentish lanes and woods for a backcloth, must have been charming. 110 00:05:46.240 --> 00:05:48.839 Here was the devout lover she had heard of, dreamed of. 111 00:05:49.439 --> 00:05:53.519 It is delightful to be regarded as perfection, not absolute perfection, 112 00:05:53.639 --> 00:05:55.399 for that might put a strain upon us to live 113 00:05:55.480 --> 00:05:58.079 up to. But it is so near perfection that to 114 00:05:58.120 --> 00:06:01.000 be more perfect would just spoil it. The spots upon 115 00:06:01.120 --> 00:06:05.000 us that unappreciative friends and relations would magnifying to blemishes 116 00:06:05.399 --> 00:06:09.360 seen in their true light. Artistic shading, relieving a faultlessness 117 00:06:09.399 --> 00:06:13.319 that might otherwise prove too glaring. Dear Hubert found her excellent, 118 00:06:13.480 --> 00:06:15.600 just as she was in every detail. It would have 119 00:06:15.600 --> 00:06:17.399 been a crime against love for her to seek to 120 00:06:17.519 --> 00:06:21.480 change herself. Well, then it was his fault, argued Robina. 121 00:06:21.720 --> 00:06:23.680 If he was silly enough to like her faults and 122 00:06:23.839 --> 00:06:27.560 encourage her in them, what could he have done, I asked, 123 00:06:27.600 --> 00:06:30.000 even if he had seen them. The lover does not 124 00:06:30.040 --> 00:06:33.519 point out his mistress's shortcomings to her. Much the more 125 00:06:33.519 --> 00:06:37.040 sensible plan if he did, insisted Robina, than if she 126 00:06:37.079 --> 00:06:39.439 cared for him, she could set to work to cure herself. 127 00:06:40.879 --> 00:06:43.439 You would like it, I said, You would appreciate it 128 00:06:43.480 --> 00:06:46.879 in your own case. Can you imagine young Butte. Why 129 00:06:46.959 --> 00:06:50.839 Young Butte, demanded Robina. What's he got to do with it? Nothing, 130 00:06:51.160 --> 00:06:53.560 I answered, except that he happens to be the first 131 00:06:53.560 --> 00:06:55.800 male creature you have ever come across since you were 132 00:06:55.800 --> 00:06:59.160 six that you haven't flirted with. I don't flirt with them, 133 00:06:59.240 --> 00:07:01.879 said Robin. I merely try to be nice to them, 134 00:07:02.319 --> 00:07:06.519 With the exception of young Butte, I persisted, he irritates me, 135 00:07:06.759 --> 00:07:11.000 Robina explained, I was reading, I said, the other day. 136 00:07:11.079 --> 00:07:14.720 An account of the marriage customs prevailing among the Lower Caucasians. 137 00:07:15.279 --> 00:07:18.199 The lover takes his stand beneath his lady's window, and, 138 00:07:18.279 --> 00:07:21.920 having attracted her attention, proceeds to sing. And if she 139 00:07:21.959 --> 00:07:24.519 seems to like it, if she listens to it without 140 00:07:24.560 --> 00:07:27.759 getting mad, that means she doesn't want him. But if 141 00:07:27.759 --> 00:07:29.959 she gets upset about it, slams down the window and 142 00:07:30.040 --> 00:07:33.160 walks away, then it's all right. I think it's The 143 00:07:33.240 --> 00:07:37.319 Lower Caucasians must be a very silly people, said Robina. 144 00:07:37.639 --> 00:07:39.639 I suppose a pail of water would be the highest 145 00:07:39.639 --> 00:07:42.920 proof of her affection. He could hope for a complex 146 00:07:43.000 --> 00:07:46.519 being man. I agreed. We will call him X. Can 147 00:07:46.560 --> 00:07:49.560 you imagine young X coming to you and saying, my 148 00:07:49.680 --> 00:07:52.920 dear Robina, you have many excellent qualities. You can be 149 00:07:53.040 --> 00:07:55.319 amiable so long as you are having your own way 150 00:07:55.360 --> 00:07:58.439 and everything, but thwarted, you can be just horrid. You 151 00:07:58.480 --> 00:08:00.720 are very kind to those who are willing for you 152 00:08:00.759 --> 00:08:02.759 to be kind to them in your own way, which 153 00:08:02.800 --> 00:08:06.319 is not always their way. You can be quite unselfish 154 00:08:06.399 --> 00:08:08.680 when you happen to be in an unselfish mood, which 155 00:08:08.720 --> 00:08:11.959 is far from frequent. You are capable and clever, but 156 00:08:12.279 --> 00:08:16.279 like most capable and clever people, impatient and domineering, highly 157 00:08:16.399 --> 00:08:19.600 energetic when not feeling lazy, ready to forgive the moment 158 00:08:19.639 --> 00:08:22.800 your temper is exhausted. You are generous and frank, but 159 00:08:22.839 --> 00:08:25.959 if your object could only be gained through meanness or deceit, 160 00:08:26.279 --> 00:08:28.680 you would not hesitate a moment longer than was necessary 161 00:08:28.680 --> 00:08:32.600 to convince yourself that the circumstances justified the means. You 162 00:08:32.639 --> 00:08:36.399 are sympathetic, tender hearted, and have a fine sense of justice. 163 00:08:36.639 --> 00:08:38.519 But I can see that tongue of yours if not 164 00:08:38.600 --> 00:08:43.200 carefully watched, wearing decidedly shrewish. You have any amount of grit. 165 00:08:43.519 --> 00:08:46.200 A man might go tiger hunting with you, with no 166 00:08:46.279 --> 00:08:50.759 one better. But you are obstinate, conceited, and exacting. In short, 167 00:08:50.799 --> 00:08:52.600 to sum you up, you have all the makings, and 168 00:08:52.679 --> 00:08:55.799 you have an ideal wife, combined with fault sufficient to 169 00:08:55.840 --> 00:08:59.600 make a Socrates regret he'd ever married you. Yes, I would, 170 00:08:59.759 --> 00:09:02.960 said Robina, springing to her feet. I could not see 171 00:09:02.960 --> 00:09:05.240 her face, but I knew there was the look upon 172 00:09:05.279 --> 00:09:07.679 it that made Priingate want to paint her as Joan 173 00:09:07.720 --> 00:09:11.120 of Arc. Only it would never stop long enough, I'd 174 00:09:11.200 --> 00:09:13.600 love him for talking like that, and I'd respect him 175 00:09:13.720 --> 00:09:15.600 if he was that sort of man. I'd pray God 176 00:09:15.639 --> 00:09:17.039 to help me to be the sort of woman he 177 00:09:17.120 --> 00:09:20.120 wanted me to be. I'd try. I'd try all day long. 178 00:09:20.159 --> 00:09:25.000 I would. I wonder, I said, Robina had surprised me. 179 00:09:25.200 --> 00:09:27.519 I admit it. I thought I knew the sex better 180 00:09:28.240 --> 00:09:31.519 any girl would, said Robin. He'd be worth it. It 181 00:09:31.559 --> 00:09:34.240 would be a new idea, I mused, God, im Himmel, 182 00:09:34.679 --> 00:09:37.639 what a new world might it not create? The fancy 183 00:09:37.679 --> 00:09:41.519 began to take hold of me. Love no longer blind love, 184 00:09:41.600 --> 00:09:44.840 refusing any more to be the poor, blind, fool sport 185 00:09:44.879 --> 00:09:48.799 of gods and men. Love no longer passioned slave, his 186 00:09:48.960 --> 00:09:53.519 bonds broken, the senseless bandage flung aside. Love helping life 187 00:09:53.559 --> 00:09:57.840 instead of muddling it. Marriage, the foundation of civilization, no 188 00:09:57.960 --> 00:10:01.600 longer reared upon the sands of lies delusions, but grappled 189 00:10:01.639 --> 00:10:05.120 to the rock of truth reality. Have you ever read 190 00:10:05.159 --> 00:10:09.320 Tom Jones? I said, no, answered robinon I've always heard 191 00:10:09.360 --> 00:10:13.000 it wasn't a nice book. It isn't, I said. Man 192 00:10:13.039 --> 00:10:16.639 isn't a nice animal, not all of him, nor woman either. 193 00:10:17.120 --> 00:10:19.519 There's a deal of the beast in man, What can 194 00:10:19.559 --> 00:10:22.480 you expect Till a few paltry thousands of years ago, 195 00:10:22.519 --> 00:10:25.480 he was a beast, fighting with other beasts, his fellow 196 00:10:25.559 --> 00:10:28.519 denizens of the woods and caves, watching for his prey, 197 00:10:28.879 --> 00:10:31.919 crouched in the long grass of the river's bank, tearing 198 00:10:31.960 --> 00:10:34.919 it with claws and teeth, growling as he ate. So 199 00:10:35.080 --> 00:10:38.679 he lived and died through the dim, unnamed ages, transmitting 200 00:10:38.679 --> 00:10:42.039 his beast's blood. His beast deal instincts to his offspring, 201 00:10:42.440 --> 00:10:46.600 growing ever stronger fiercer from generation to generation, while the 202 00:10:46.720 --> 00:10:51.159 rocks piled up their strata and the oceans shaped their beds. Moses, 203 00:10:51.519 --> 00:10:55.120 why Lord Rothschild's great grandfather, a few score times removed, 204 00:10:55.200 --> 00:10:59.159 must have known Moses talked with them. Babylon It is 205 00:10:59.200 --> 00:11:02.279 a modern city fallen into disuse for the moment, owing 206 00:11:02.320 --> 00:11:05.960 to alteration of traffic routs history. It is the tale 207 00:11:06.000 --> 00:11:08.799 of to day. Man was crawling about the world on 208 00:11:08.879 --> 00:11:11.240 all fours, learning to be an animal for millions of 209 00:11:11.279 --> 00:11:13.639 years before the secret of his birth was whispered to him. 210 00:11:14.200 --> 00:11:16.279 It is only during the last few centuries that he 211 00:11:16.279 --> 00:11:19.720 has been trying to be a man. Our modern morality, why, 212 00:11:19.840 --> 00:11:21.879 compared with the teachings of nature. It is but a 213 00:11:21.879 --> 00:11:24.639 few days old. What do you expect that he shall 214 00:11:24.639 --> 00:11:27.159 forget the lessons of the eons at the bidding of 215 00:11:27.200 --> 00:11:30.519 the hours? Then you advise me to read Tom Jones, 216 00:11:30.639 --> 00:11:34.480 said robinon Yes, I said I do. I should not 217 00:11:34.639 --> 00:11:37.039 if I thought you were still a child, knowing only 218 00:11:37.080 --> 00:11:40.840 blind trust or blind terror. The sun is not extinguished 219 00:11:40.840 --> 00:11:44.159 because occasionally obscured by mist. The scent of the rose 220 00:11:44.240 --> 00:11:46.200 is not dead because of the worm and the leaf. 221 00:11:46.840 --> 00:11:49.600 A healthy rose can afford a few worms has got 222 00:11:49.639 --> 00:11:53.399 to anyhow, all men are not Tom Jones's. The standard 223 00:11:53.480 --> 00:11:56.679 of masculine behavior continues to go up. Many of us 224 00:11:56.679 --> 00:11:59.000 make fine efforts to conform to it, and some of 225 00:11:59.080 --> 00:12:01.960 us succeed. But the Tom Jones is there in all 226 00:12:02.000 --> 00:12:04.519 of us who are not a knemic or consumptive. And 227 00:12:04.600 --> 00:12:06.720 there's no sense at all in getting cross with us 228 00:12:06.759 --> 00:12:09.159 about it, because we cannot help it. We are doing 229 00:12:09.200 --> 00:12:12.639 our best. In another hundred thousand years or so, provided 230 00:12:12.679 --> 00:12:15.360 all goes well, we shall be the perfect man. And 231 00:12:15.440 --> 00:12:18.039 seeing our early training, I flatter myself that up to 232 00:12:18.080 --> 00:12:21.559 the present we have done remarkably well. Nothing like being 233 00:12:21.600 --> 00:12:26.159 satisfied with one's self, said robinon. I'm not satisfied, I said, 234 00:12:26.159 --> 00:12:28.799 I'm only hopeful. But it irritates me when I hear 235 00:12:28.840 --> 00:12:31.120 people talk as though man had been born a white 236 00:12:31.159 --> 00:12:34.919 souled angel and was making supernatural efforts to become a sinner. 237 00:12:35.440 --> 00:12:37.799 That seems to me the way to discourage him what 238 00:12:37.879 --> 00:12:41.279 he wants is bucking up somebody to say to him, bravo, 239 00:12:41.360 --> 00:12:44.360 why this is splendid. Just think, my boy, what you were, 240 00:12:44.360 --> 00:12:48.159 and that not so very long ago, an unwashed harry savage, 241 00:12:48.759 --> 00:12:51.360 Your law that of the jungle, Your morals those of 242 00:12:51.399 --> 00:12:54.639 the rabbit warren. Now look at yourself, dressed in your 243 00:12:54.679 --> 00:12:58.240 little shiny hat, your trousers neatly creased, walking with your 244 00:12:58.240 --> 00:13:01.519 wife to church on Sunday. Keep on, That's all you've 245 00:13:01.519 --> 00:13:03.799 got to do. In a few more centuries, your own 246 00:13:03.840 --> 00:13:08.080 mother nature won't know you, you women, I continued, Why 247 00:13:08.080 --> 00:13:10.320 a handful of years ago we bought and sold you, 248 00:13:10.519 --> 00:13:12.960 kept you in cages, took the stick to you when 249 00:13:12.960 --> 00:13:14.840 you were not spry in doing what you were told. 250 00:13:15.399 --> 00:13:19.120 Did you ever read the history of patient Griselda, Yes, 251 00:13:19.279 --> 00:13:23.240 said Robina. I have I gathered from her tone that 252 00:13:23.279 --> 00:13:26.919 the joan of arc expression had departed, had Primgate wanted 253 00:13:26.919 --> 00:13:29.039 to paint her at that particular moment, I should have 254 00:13:29.039 --> 00:13:33.279 suggested Catherine during the earlier stages, listening to a curtain 255 00:13:33.399 --> 00:13:37.279 lecture from Petruccio, Are you suggesting that all women should 256 00:13:37.279 --> 00:13:40.360 take her for a model? No, I said, I'm not, 257 00:13:41.159 --> 00:13:44.320 though were we living in Chaucer's time, I might, and 258 00:13:44.360 --> 00:13:47.159 you would not think it even silly. What I'm impressing 259 00:13:47.200 --> 00:13:49.159 upon you is that the human race has yet a 260 00:13:49.200 --> 00:13:51.799 little way to travel before the average man can be 261 00:13:51.840 --> 00:13:54.200 regarded as an up to date edition of King Arthur, 262 00:13:54.639 --> 00:13:57.600 the King Arthur of the poetical legend. I mean, don't 263 00:13:57.600 --> 00:14:00.399 be too impatient with him, thinking what a beast he 264 00:14:00.440 --> 00:14:03.399 has been ought to make him impatient himself with himself 265 00:14:03.559 --> 00:14:05.960 considered Robin, he ought to be feeling so ashamed of 266 00:14:06.039 --> 00:14:08.879 himself as to be willing to do anything. The owl 267 00:14:08.919 --> 00:14:12.320 in the old youth screamed, whether with indignation or amusement. 268 00:14:12.360 --> 00:14:15.600 I cannot tell a woman, I said, had the power 269 00:14:15.679 --> 00:14:18.240 been hers? Which she have used it to sweeter purpose? 270 00:14:18.679 --> 00:14:23.480 Where is your evidence, your Cleopatras, pompadours Jezebels, your Catherines 271 00:14:23.519 --> 00:14:27.320 of Russia, late empresses of China, your foustines of all 272 00:14:27.360 --> 00:14:31.159 ages and all climes, your mother brown Rigs, your Lucretia 273 00:14:31.240 --> 00:14:35.799 Borges Salomes. I could weary you with names, Your Roman 274 00:14:35.879 --> 00:14:40.360 task mistresses, your drivers of lodging house slavies, your ladies 275 00:14:40.360 --> 00:14:42.759 who whipped their pages to death in the Middle Ages, 276 00:14:43.080 --> 00:14:46.039 Your modern dames of fashion, decked with the plumage of 277 00:14:46.039 --> 00:14:50.320 the tortured grove. There have been other women, also noble women, 278 00:14:50.679 --> 00:14:53.919 their names like beacon lights studying the dark waste of history. 279 00:14:54.559 --> 00:14:58.320 So there have been noble men, saints, martyrs, heroes. The 280 00:14:58.399 --> 00:15:02.039 sex line divides us physically, not morally. Woman has been 281 00:15:02.120 --> 00:15:04.440 man's accomplice, and too many crimes to claim to be 282 00:15:04.480 --> 00:15:08.879 his judge. Male and female created He them like and like, 283 00:15:08.960 --> 00:15:12.399 for good and evil, the good fortune. I found a 284 00:15:12.399 --> 00:15:18.000 loose match, I lighted a fresh cigar. Dick. I suppose 285 00:15:18.120 --> 00:15:22.279 is the average man, said Robina, most of us are, 286 00:15:22.440 --> 00:15:25.120 I said, when we are at home, Carlyle was the 287 00:15:25.159 --> 00:15:28.000 average man in the little front parlor and chaining row. 288 00:15:28.440 --> 00:15:30.960 Though to hear folks talk, you might think no married 289 00:15:30.960 --> 00:15:34.240 couple outside literary circles had ever been known to exchange 290 00:15:34.240 --> 00:15:37.679 a cross. Look so was Oliver Cromwell in his own 291 00:15:37.720 --> 00:15:40.919 palace with the door shut. Missus Cromwell must have thought 292 00:15:41.000 --> 00:15:44.559 him monstrous, silly placing sticky sweetmeats for his guests to 293 00:15:44.600 --> 00:15:49.559 sit on, told him so, most likely a cheery, kindly man. Notwithstanding, 294 00:15:49.600 --> 00:15:52.519 though given to moods, he and Missus Cromwell seemed to 295 00:15:52.559 --> 00:15:55.320 have rubbed along on the whole pretty well together. Old 296 00:15:55.360 --> 00:16:00.519 Sam Johnson, great, god fearing, lovable, cantankerous, old brute. Life 297 00:16:00.559 --> 00:16:02.879 with him in a small house on a limited income 298 00:16:02.960 --> 00:16:06.360 must have had its ups and downs. Milton and Frederick 299 00:16:06.440 --> 00:16:09.080 the Great were one hopes, a little below the average, 300 00:16:09.480 --> 00:16:13.080 did their best, no doubt lacked understanding. Not so easy 301 00:16:13.120 --> 00:16:15.000 as it looks, living up to the standard of the 302 00:16:15.039 --> 00:16:18.519 average man. Very clever people in particular find it tiring. 303 00:16:19.559 --> 00:16:22.440 I shall never marry, said Robina. At least I hope. 304 00:16:22.440 --> 00:16:27.080 I sha'n't. Why hope, I asked, because I hope I 305 00:16:27.120 --> 00:16:29.960 shall never be idiot enough, she answered, I see it 306 00:16:29.960 --> 00:16:33.759 all so clearly. I wish I didn't love. It's only 307 00:16:33.759 --> 00:16:36.279 an ugly thing with a pretty name. It will not 308 00:16:36.440 --> 00:16:38.480 be me that he will fall in love with. He 309 00:16:38.519 --> 00:16:41.039 will not know me until it is too late, how 310 00:16:41.080 --> 00:16:44.000 can he? It will be merely with the outside of me, 311 00:16:44.399 --> 00:16:47.639 my pink and white skin, my rounded arms. I feel 312 00:16:47.679 --> 00:16:49.720 it sometimes when I see men looking at me, and 313 00:16:49.759 --> 00:16:52.720 it makes me mad. And at other times the admiration 314 00:16:52.840 --> 00:16:55.679 in their eyes pleases me, and that makes me madder. Still, 315 00:16:56.879 --> 00:16:59.960 the moon had slipped behind the wood. She had risen, 316 00:17:00.000 --> 00:17:03.240 and leaning against the porch, was standing with her hands clasped. 317 00:17:03.639 --> 00:17:06.440 I fancy she had forgotten me. She seemed to be 318 00:17:06.519 --> 00:17:09.880 talking to the night. It's only a trick of nature 319 00:17:09.920 --> 00:17:12.599 to make fools of us, she said. He will tell 320 00:17:12.599 --> 00:17:14.480 me I am all the world to him, that his 321 00:17:14.599 --> 00:17:17.599 love will outlive the stars, will believe it himself at 322 00:17:17.599 --> 00:17:20.079 the time, poor fellow, he will call me a hundred 323 00:17:20.079 --> 00:17:22.839 pretty names. We'll kiss my feet and hands, and if 324 00:17:22.839 --> 00:17:25.039 I'm fool enough to listen to him, it may last. 325 00:17:25.160 --> 00:17:28.880 She laughed. It was rather an ugly laugh. Six months 326 00:17:28.880 --> 00:17:31.319 with luck, perhaps a year, if I'm careful not to 327 00:17:31.319 --> 00:17:33.039 go out in the east wind and come home with 328 00:17:33.079 --> 00:17:35.359 a red nose, and never let him catch me in 329 00:17:35.400 --> 00:17:38.200 curl papers. It will not be me that he will 330 00:17:38.240 --> 00:17:40.759 want only my youth and the novelty of me, and 331 00:17:40.880 --> 00:17:44.359 the mystery and when that is gone. She turned to me. 332 00:17:44.480 --> 00:17:46.400 It was a strange face I saw then in the 333 00:17:46.440 --> 00:17:49.680 pale light, quite a fierce little face. She laid her 334 00:17:49.720 --> 00:17:53.200 hands upon my shoulders, and I felt them cold. What 335 00:17:53.359 --> 00:17:56.240 comes when it is dead? She said? What follows? You 336 00:17:56.400 --> 00:17:59.880 must know? Tell me I want the truth. Her vehem 337 00:18:00.200 --> 00:18:03.240 had arisen, so suddenly the little girl I had set 338 00:18:03.240 --> 00:18:06.559 out to talk with was no longer there. To my bewilderment, 339 00:18:06.559 --> 00:18:09.480 it was a woman that was questioning me. I drew 340 00:18:09.480 --> 00:18:12.880 her down beside me, but the childish face was still stern. 341 00:18:13.400 --> 00:18:16.079 I want the truth, she said, so that I answered, 342 00:18:16.200 --> 00:18:20.240 very gravely. When the passion has passed, when the glory 343 00:18:20.279 --> 00:18:23.720 and the wonder of desire, nature's eternal ritual of marriage, 344 00:18:23.960 --> 00:18:28.559 solemnizing sanctifying it to her commands, has ended, When sooner 345 00:18:28.680 --> 00:18:31.759 or later, some gray dawn finds you wandering, bewildered in 346 00:18:31.880 --> 00:18:36.240 once familiar places, seeking vainly the lost palace of youth's dreams, 347 00:18:36.720 --> 00:18:39.839 When love's frenzy has faded, like the fragrance of the blossom, 348 00:18:40.160 --> 00:18:42.880 like the splendor of the dawn, there will remained to 349 00:18:42.960 --> 00:18:45.839 you just what was there before, no more, no less. 350 00:18:46.519 --> 00:18:48.759 If passion was all you had to give to one another. 351 00:18:48.799 --> 00:18:52.079 God help you. You have had your hour of madness. 352 00:18:52.119 --> 00:18:55.240 It is finished. If greed of praise and worship was 353 00:18:55.279 --> 00:18:58.400 your price, while you have had your payment, the bargain 354 00:18:58.480 --> 00:19:02.119 is complete. Your hope to be made happy was your allure. 355 00:19:02.440 --> 00:19:05.200 One pities you. We do not make each other happy. 356 00:19:05.680 --> 00:19:08.079 Happiness is the gift of the gods, not of man. 357 00:19:08.680 --> 00:19:12.079 The secret lies within you, not without What remains to 358 00:19:12.119 --> 00:19:14.839 you will depend not upon what you thought, but upon 359 00:19:14.880 --> 00:19:18.000 what you are. If behind the lover there was the man, 360 00:19:18.480 --> 00:19:21.279 behind the impossible goddess of his love, sick brain, some 361 00:19:21.440 --> 00:19:24.839 honest human woman, then life lies not behind you, but 362 00:19:24.920 --> 00:19:28.480 before you. Life is giving, not getting. That is the 363 00:19:28.519 --> 00:19:31.160 mistake we, most of us, set out with. It is 364 00:19:31.240 --> 00:19:34.359 the work that is the joy, not the wages, the game, 365 00:19:34.559 --> 00:19:37.519 not the score. The lover's delight is to yield, not 366 00:19:37.640 --> 00:19:41.240 to claim. The crown of motherhood is pain. To serve 367 00:19:41.279 --> 00:19:44.200 the state at cost of ease and leisure. To spend 368 00:19:44.240 --> 00:19:46.839 his thought and labor upon a hundred schemes is the 369 00:19:46.880 --> 00:19:51.119 man's ambition. Life is doing, not havy. It is to 370 00:19:51.160 --> 00:19:53.960 gain the peak. The climber strives, not to possess it. 371 00:19:54.799 --> 00:19:57.240 Fools marry thinking what they are going to get out 372 00:19:57.279 --> 00:20:01.000 of it? Good store of joys and pleasures, opportunities for 373 00:20:01.039 --> 00:20:05.720 self indulgence, eternal soft caresses, the wages of the wanton. 374 00:20:06.400 --> 00:20:11.079 The rewards of marriage are toil, duty, responsibility, manhood, womanhood, 375 00:20:11.640 --> 00:20:14.799 love's baby talk. You will have outgrown. You will no 376 00:20:14.880 --> 00:20:19.079 longer be his goddess, angel, popsy, wopsy, queen of his heart. 377 00:20:19.759 --> 00:20:23.680 There are finer names than these, wife, mother, priestess. In 378 00:20:23.720 --> 00:20:28.079 the temple of humanity, marriage is renunciation, the sacrifice of 379 00:20:28.160 --> 00:20:31.799 self upon the altar of the race. A trick of nature, 380 00:20:31.839 --> 00:20:35.119 you call it, perhaps, but a trick of nature compelling 381 00:20:35.160 --> 00:20:38.400 you to surrender yourself to the purposes of God. I 382 00:20:38.480 --> 00:20:40.759 fancy we must have sat in silence for quite a 383 00:20:40.799 --> 00:20:44.119 long while, for the moon creeping upward past the wood 384 00:20:44.160 --> 00:20:47.279 had flooded the fields again with light before Robina spoke. 385 00:20:47.880 --> 00:20:50.920 Then all love is needless, she said, We could do 386 00:20:50.960 --> 00:20:54.440 better without it. Choose with more discretion. If it is 387 00:20:54.480 --> 00:20:56.480 only something that worries us for a little while and 388 00:20:56.519 --> 00:20:59.039 then passes, what is the sense of it? You could 389 00:20:59.119 --> 00:21:02.279 ask the same question of life itself. I said, something 390 00:21:02.319 --> 00:21:05.599 that worries us for a little while then passes. Perhaps 391 00:21:05.640 --> 00:21:08.839 the worry, as you call it, has its uses. Volcanic 392 00:21:08.920 --> 00:21:12.359 upheavals are necessary to the making of a world. Without them, 393 00:21:12.400 --> 00:21:15.720 the ground would remain rock bound, unfitted for its purposes. 394 00:21:16.359 --> 00:21:19.680 That explosion of youths pent up forces that we term love, 395 00:21:20.079 --> 00:21:22.799 serves to the making of man and woman. It does 396 00:21:22.839 --> 00:21:26.440 not die, it takes new shape. The blossom fades as 397 00:21:26.480 --> 00:21:30.000 the fruit forms. The passion passes to give place to peace. 398 00:21:30.480 --> 00:21:34.039 The trembling lover has become the helper, the comforter, the husband. 399 00:21:34.599 --> 00:21:38.240 But the failures robin and persisted. I do not mean 400 00:21:38.279 --> 00:21:40.880 the silly or the wicked people, but the people who 401 00:21:40.920 --> 00:21:44.000