WEBVTT

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<v Speaker 1>Shortage of dumb people doing really stupid things. Welcome to

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<v Speaker 1>another edition of Idiotology. We'll let your taco one O

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<v Speaker 1>one one w jr R.

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<v Speaker 2>But your freaking idiots all right. This hour brought you

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<v Speaker 2>by our iHeartRadio Music Festival. It's in September, two big

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<v Speaker 2>nights in Vegas Tmobile Arena. You can win a trip

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<v Speaker 2>there for you and a guest today plus one thousand bucks,

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<v Speaker 2>three chances today, three more chances tomorrow before the event

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<v Speaker 2>even goes on sale. It's a text to win contest taco. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>you get those keywords.

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<v Speaker 3>First one's gonna go out around nine oh five, and

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<v Speaker 3>uh you texted off two hundred and two hundred simple enough.

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<v Speaker 2>Nine oh five, one oh five, five oh five the giveaway.

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<v Speaker 3>Times and today's probably a really good chance to win

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<v Speaker 3>that first one. You know, after big Metallica weekend, bunch

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<v Speaker 3>of stuff going on around town.

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<v Speaker 2>People might be slacking, but not you.

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<v Speaker 3>You're Johnny eam Spot or jenium Spot.

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<v Speaker 2>Or your pet. Zebra Edding got caught. The saga of

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<v Speaker 2>ed the Runaway Zebra and Tennessee came to an end

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<v Speaker 2>yesterday when he was safely apprehended, caught and airlifted, airlifted

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<v Speaker 2>in a net via a helicopter to an awaiting trailer.

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<v Speaker 2>I'll get him safely back with his owners after being

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<v Speaker 2>on the run for more than a week, running through

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<v Speaker 2>central Tennessee.

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<v Speaker 3>I just refreshed the jr R Facebook page to look

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<v Speaker 3>at some different Metallica footage from Friday and last night,

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<v Speaker 3>and all of a sudden, it's the ed to zebra

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<v Speaker 3>hovering in the air in a net.

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<v Speaker 2>You may have seen the hundreds of memes that have

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<v Speaker 2>been circulating over the last week, because yeah it, folks

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<v Speaker 2>latched onto this because it seemed Ed was very elusive

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<v Speaker 2>to everybody except people creating memes. Who spotted Ed in

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<v Speaker 2>a waffle house and you know the there are some

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<v Speaker 2>funny stuff there. He did get loose and was running

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<v Speaker 2>at one point on Interstate twenty four, which had to

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<v Speaker 2>be shut down. They tried to capture him there, but

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<v Speaker 2>he made his way off into the woods, and then

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<v Speaker 2>he hung around a couple of neighborhoods residential areas for

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<v Speaker 2>a few days, and then they spotted him yesterday in

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<v Speaker 2>a pasture in a real part of Tennessee, which is

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<v Speaker 2>when this team from Texas who was hired by the

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<v Speaker 2>Zebra's owners to assist in locating and apprehending and catching

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<v Speaker 2>Ed were able to do so safely yesterday.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm surprised they had to hire somebody from Texas. If

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<v Speaker 3>you're in Tennessee, wouldn't you just have a Tennessee person

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<v Speaker 3>do it.

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<v Speaker 2>I forget what this outfit from Texas is called, but

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<v Speaker 2>they've they assistant kind of offbeat situations like this pertaining

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<v Speaker 2>to search and rescue, so that they were well equipped

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<v Speaker 2>with the nets, the zebra net, helicopter, the trailer classic again,

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<v Speaker 2>as Taco said visuals on our Facebook page, if you

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<v Speaker 2>see Ed, he looks okay in the netlin all right,

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<v Speaker 2>you got me? You got me? And not only Ed,

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<v Speaker 2>like I said.

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<v Speaker 3>A bunch of Metallica footage up on the j R

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<v Speaker 3>Facebook page as well.

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<v Speaker 1>Poor Ed.

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<v Speaker 3>Didn't he look like just a guy who is out

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<v Speaker 3>having fun, right Pat?

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<v Speaker 2>Oh Yeah, just a little vacation, a little zebra vacation.

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<v Speaker 3>Curising around, maybe you know, raising some hell with some horses.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, go at least they got stripes.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, they made gum after me, would make after you

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<v Speaker 3>nothing but glue.

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<v Speaker 2>Ironic. They caught him on a race weekend too. The

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<v Speaker 2>Irony also have a zebra named dead. It's usually the

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<v Speaker 2>horse straight up horse. Yeah, of course, uh huh, all right,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm gonna I am going to nominate this as a

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<v Speaker 2>headline of the week. Now, on the surface, I don't

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<v Speaker 2>want to make excuses here, but I just want you

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<v Speaker 2>to take this into consideration from when we call upon

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<v Speaker 2>you later this week to ultimately decide what reigned supremus

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<v Speaker 2>headline of the week. So is it a headline of

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<v Speaker 2>the week or now? I believe it is based on

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<v Speaker 2>the context of what's in the headline and the particular

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<v Speaker 2>location where this happened. Because you'll go, huh, that's not

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<v Speaker 2>surprising one bit. Tell me when you're ready, I'm ready,

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<v Speaker 2>Hold on go. Sixty year old man found dead in

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<v Speaker 2>Brooklyn inside abandoned ambulance.

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<v Speaker 3>Six year old man found dead in Brooklyn inside abandoned ambulance.

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<v Speaker 3>So this is just an ambulance on the side of

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<v Speaker 3>the road. He took up residence.

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<v Speaker 2>An ambulance on the side of the road that had

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<v Speaker 2>flipped over on its side. So they come to check

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<v Speaker 2>this thing out. There's no drivers or EMTs or anybody

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<v Speaker 2>to be found. They look inside. There's the dude inside dead.

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<v Speaker 2>That's the extent of this story. So think he stole it.

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<v Speaker 2>I have no idea, but Brooklyn is what stands out

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<v Speaker 2>to be like, Okay, it's New York whatever, just another

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<v Speaker 2>stiff on the side of the road. Just I can

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<v Speaker 2>just picture the the you know, the the police or

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<v Speaker 2>fire department. You came out to, uh check this out. Nay, Jerry,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, I don't want to take a look at this. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>there's one in there.

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<v Speaker 3>See if I'm if I'm just your normal you know,

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<v Speaker 3>civilian walking or driving by, and I see it, you're

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<v Speaker 3>ignoring it. I'm probably gonna look to make sure there's

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<v Speaker 3>no medics in there hurt. And then the irony there, God,

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<v Speaker 3>this is all irony this morning. Is that I'd be

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<v Speaker 3>the one helping a medic. That's kind of weird. But no,

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<v Speaker 3>I'd make sure that there were no medics or anything

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<v Speaker 3>in there. But if I saw the dead guy, I

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<v Speaker 3>gotta get to work. Yeah, he's no evil, see no evil.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm out. I might make a phone call and say, hey,

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<v Speaker 3>there's a but then I'm a witness and i'm some case.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I don't want to be filling out reports and stuff.

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<v Speaker 2>They didn't go into if this was a super old

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<v Speaker 2>ambulance or no, that's what I'm saying. This is flipped ambulance.

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<v Speaker 2>Gave me everything I got here, and there's so many questions.

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<v Speaker 2>But then you consider the source and a location, which

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<v Speaker 2>is why in my mind is Brooklyn right? Okay, we'll

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<v Speaker 2>set it aside.

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<v Speaker 3>We'll see you ever had their bagels, the Brooklyn Water

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<v Speaker 3>Bagels or whatever that's called. My wife almost what I

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<v Speaker 3>only asked because you said Brooklyn, and my wife said, uh,

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<v Speaker 3>asked if we were going out to eat Friday for lunch,

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<v Speaker 3>and that was when she goes, oh, we could do

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<v Speaker 3>that Brooklyn Water Bagels.

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<v Speaker 2>They're supposedly good. You haven't the extent of my bagel

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<v Speaker 2>is some dude named Thomas. Really, you don't go to

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<v Speaker 2>a bagel place? Not really?

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<v Speaker 3>No, I guess it's just because I have a bagel

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<v Speaker 3>king right down the street from my house and I've

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<v Speaker 3>actually gone there. Pat you're ready for this since I

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<v Speaker 3>was in winter Park High School skipping the first part

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<v Speaker 3>of school to go out bagels.

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<v Speaker 2>Good for you helping local business, that's it. It wasn't

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<v Speaker 2>even that. It's just the hell of a bagel. Are

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<v Speaker 2>you trying to do a round table. No.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh wow, well if you want to. No, well, no,

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<v Speaker 3>I don't have a lot to add to everything with

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<v Speaker 3>your bagel. Oh, it's in everything, Bagel, Thomas is everything.

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<v Speaker 3>I only buy them when they're buy one, get one

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<v Speaker 3>at Public's, which they alternate. One week it will be

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<v Speaker 3>the English muffins, then the next week it's the bagels.

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<v Speaker 3>So it's so, you know, it's a perfect.

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<v Speaker 2>Can I turn you onto something?

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<v Speaker 3>You need to find a bagel place near you and

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<v Speaker 3>go in there and eat a fresh bagel. You will

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<v Speaker 3>never eat one of the out of the bag again.

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<v Speaker 2>I know.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm just I'm letting you know. I'm trying to help

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<v Speaker 3>a buddy out. There's got to be there's two Jays,

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<v Speaker 3>two bagels, because that's kind of.

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<v Speaker 2>No, that's not really near you either. It's gotta be up.

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<v Speaker 2>I'll look it up, Bob, Really, don't exert any energy

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<v Speaker 2>on this. I'm fine with my Thomas's bagels. They've dune

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<v Speaker 2>me fine for fifty plus years.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm telling you, you gotta.

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<v Speaker 2>Ida how you are. I know that you're a food dude.

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<v Speaker 3>Like when it comes to uh, it comes to you know,

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<v Speaker 3>Petty's meats. We both love their uh long lead or

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<v Speaker 3>in nicos or INCO's cafe and bank and the deadn't

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<v Speaker 3>scream anyway. I was trying to help you out. I'll

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<v Speaker 3>tell you if I come across one, I'll stop searching

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<v Speaker 3>it now so I.

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<v Speaker 2>Can come on with you. Come back to me, man,

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<v Speaker 2>let's go. Uh middle aged men learn to take better

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<v Speaker 2>selfies for dating apps. In Tokyo, you get some unlucky

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<v Speaker 2>and love single guys in their middle aged years who

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<v Speaker 2>are still trying to look for love and it came

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<v Speaker 2>to the attention of someone. Hey, a lot of these

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<v Speaker 2>guys don't know what the hell they're doing when it

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<v Speaker 2>comes to pictures, taking pictures and sharing them on there.

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<v Speaker 2>They could probably do some good to learn some tips

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<v Speaker 2>and what they all got together and learning how to

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<v Speaker 2>take better selfies okay, to use on your dating apps

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<v Speaker 2>in hopes of attracting the one. I'm telling you, if

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<v Speaker 2>you're all.

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<v Speaker 3>Getting together to figure this out, why wouldn't you just

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<v Speaker 3>take pictures of each other?

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<v Speaker 2>Like, hey Japan Man.

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<v Speaker 3>Hey Wang, you want to snap a shot of me?

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<v Speaker 3>Somebody said Brooklyn bagels are the best. They bring in

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<v Speaker 3>the water straight from New York. Everything from New York's better.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah. Did they get everything first there, Matt, my cousin.

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<v Speaker 2>He always gets all the new releases music. Yeah, they

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<v Speaker 2>always have it.

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<v Speaker 1>Matt.

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<v Speaker 3>We're having bagel round table. Somebody goes Bagel World, Bagel World,

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<v Speaker 3>Merit Island, Yeah, Einstein's Bagels.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 3>Uh, Bagel Barn New suburna Beach, been there, done it,

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<v Speaker 3>still think Bagel king. Ah, here's another one. Pat, somebody

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<v Speaker 3>else just trying to help you out here, Bud. He's right,

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<v Speaker 3>fresh bagels, no matter the flavor, way better.

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<v Speaker 2>I have a store bought different. I should probably tell

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<v Speaker 2>you this part as well, which may shed some whitest wine,

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<v Speaker 2>for when I do have a bagel, I cook it

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<v Speaker 2>as well done as I possibly can without burning it. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>because and then I'm a store ball bagel. And then

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<v Speaker 2>I uh and I slather it with uh with carry

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<v Speaker 2>gold butter. That's that's all I have on. Yeah. You

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<v Speaker 2>don't do cream cheese either, no either, No locks, no

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<v Speaker 2>cream cheese, none of that business. So uh, you know

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<v Speaker 2>you have to have a bagel place. Pat.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm leaving mine now, That's what somebody said it two

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<v Speaker 3>two five six. Listen to Taco Pat. Bagels are like women,

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<v Speaker 3>you're only happy with a because you're only happy with

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<v Speaker 3>a three because you haven't tasted a ten. Wow, somebody

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<v Speaker 3>just on a on a Monday morning compared with women

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<v Speaker 3>to bagels.

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<v Speaker 2>At least didn't make a whole joke. The we got

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<v Speaker 2>j R R, Orlando's rock station,