Speaker 1: I want to point something out to our listeners, the Barnacles,
who've been listening to us for seven years. Yeah, Sandy
used to be in the galley every episode sometimes, yeah,
multiple times. I want to point out that it was
our relentless ball bustling that drove her out of that
part of the show. It was us, and you are welcome.
Speaker 2: You're a loser. Hey, well you're welcome to bad TV.
I'm Dylan, and that's pat.
Speaker 1: Permission to come aboard. Do I sound sexy?
Speaker 2: Yes?
Speaker 1: Oh I thought you were gonna say sex.
Speaker 2: Oh no, no, no, do I sound sexy?
Speaker 3: No?
Speaker 2: Yeah, just sick. I mean there's a nasty flu going
around short for a flu influenza. Fun fact, Calen, how
you doing.
Speaker 1: I'm doing good, trying not to get sick. Not from you,
it's going around the kids. Well, you're going to be sick.
You're in a very small room with him, and he's
clearly ill.
Speaker 2: Well I was last week. I didn't catch it. Yeah.
Speaker 1: You know, my grandmother used to say, and this.
Speaker 2: Is she's dead.
Speaker 1: Oh she's been dead for a while.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: It's it's an old wives tale. They used to say.
When you were outside as a little kid and you
weren't wearing a jacket. Get out of the cold. You're
going to get a cold. Yeah, I don't think that's
how you get a cold.
Speaker 2: No, I don't think so.
Speaker 1: But then it was such a stupid thing.
Speaker 2: But there is some some you know, scientific backing too.
Speaker 1: Wouldn't eskimos get sick all the time, Well.
Speaker 2: They're acclimated to the cold weather. I mean, listen, if
I had to gum down whale blubber, that would make
me sick. Not those people. They love it.
Speaker 1: I've never seen an attractive eskimo, by the way.
Speaker 2: Oh they're beautiful. Some of the eskimos are beautiful, and
I think they're Eskimo's a a harmful, an actually reductive word.
I think that they long to be referred to as Inuits.
Speaker 1: Oh, oh, Inuit pies. Let's just ruin it. Let's make
nothing fun.
Speaker 2: An eskimo pie. What is that?
Speaker 1: You've never had an eskimo pie? Well, I guess they're gone.
Speaker 2: Now. It sounds like a sexual thing now, two men
climaxing at the same time or something and then high
fiving after. And I'm sorry that I went there immediately,
but it's the influenza.
Speaker 1: You might want to tell your mic closer to your
voice because it's such a low tone.
Speaker 2: Yeah, can you hear me?
Speaker 1: Okay, Caitlin, sorry, we probably will move on. You've heard
of an eskimo pie?
Speaker 2: Right? I have not?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 2: Yeah, all right? Whatever us too uncultured, Swane. We know
what GTA is, but not an eskimo pie? Crazy? What
is an eskimo pie? Please? The anticipation is killing me.
I can't sit in this mystery anymore.
Speaker 1: Well, it's a chocolate cookie thing with a little bit
of marshmallow in it.
Speaker 2: Okay, is that a Northeast kind of thing?
Speaker 1: Perhaps?
Speaker 2: Yeah? No, I know a moon pie.
Speaker 1: A big clam, by the way, is what those little
Gambinos were referring to when they were saying a casino clam.
Speaker 2: You know what? Can we we discussed last night? How
you know when you it's so funny. We were literally
having this conversation. I'm I'm a little I'm not bigoted
towards Italian Americans.
Speaker 1: Oh can be their fair game.
Speaker 2: I love the familial element of that culture. I think
it's really really beautiful and it's extremely romantic. But the
crime family element, the Gwedets and the guidos and the
gabba ghoul and the tony soprano and the chest hair
and the medallion of all of it is is quite
grating for me at times. And that's what we had
on display here this evening.
Speaker 1: How about an entire generation or ethnicity taking pride and
sounding stupid, Well, honestly, what other culture sounds that ridiculous
and takes pride in it?
Speaker 2: Well, there's there's this thing where yeah, I mean, there's
just self tanner everywhere, and it's like you're you're literally staining,
you're staining the environment. But we're gonna get into the
whole thing. Okay, just and and and there's been this sorry,
let's get into.
Speaker 1: By the way, my twenty three and me, I'm like
eight percent Italian, so I get to harp on myself.
Speaker 2: Okay, good, Yeah, And I'll make fun of the Jays,
you know, hey, or the Irish. We can both take
the Irish to task. You know, druidic people running around
and for us with eyeballs hanging around their neck, it's
ridiculous exactly.
Speaker 1: But we don't talk funny.
Speaker 2: Well, you kind of do brudders and stuff like that.
It sounds a little funny, okay, but it's charming. Yes,
let's get into our thoughts of this episode, but before
we do, we should say that we've got a couple
of mo days for free traders content. The rest of
the season is going to be at patreon dot com
Slash another podcast network. Really excited to recap that with
k Casey, which I believe will already be on this
speed by the time you hear that. So go check
that out, go listen to her show. Patty is frequenting
that podcast more often. It's very, very fun. And yeah,
follow Ruby at Papayta Girl.
Speaker 1: Oh and I should also say Love Is Blind is
just around the corner. And while we took one season off,
because let's all admit that show has been questionable as
far as quality as of late.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, like, honestly, i'd I'd probably rather watch.
I have renewed optimism for Love Is Blind. Okay. A
lot of people said, why'd you do that? You jumped off. No, naturally,
we'll jump back on it. It'll be absolute doctors, of course,
but you know, you tell me at the launch of
last season watch twenty five at the of American Pickers
or this season of Love is give me American Pickers
every single time. I want to learn more about the
storehouses of apple ash and trash digging through said trash.
I want to learn about hot wheels. I want to
learn about mold. You know, it's just more interesting to me.
Speaker 1: Wow, that rusted old Coca Cola sign is worth fifty
thousand dollars.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well not definitely, not fifteen fifty thousand. But they'll
find stuff that I think is worth seventeen They'll flip
it for twenty two. Wow. Yeah, So it's really exciting
stuff over there at American Pickers. Let's get into our
thoughts and pots about this episode. Go for it, Okay, Keaylen,
how you do? You're doing good.
Speaker 1: We've seen Uncle Frank before. I forget who what Charter
guess he was hanging out. That's the old guy, the
old Italian guy.
Speaker 2: Oh maybe Helen Ooh.
Speaker 1: Is he a Jason? Hell he might be? I mean god,
the same horrible black hair dye, cheap hair dye. So yeah,
this could be adjacent Helen Huey.
Speaker 2: Yeah. So a lot of proscudo flying around that neck
of the woods. You know that I don't I don't
know what that means. Why go ahead.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I guess some of them are obnoxious, but I
think they were just kind of having fun. Uh so
they're kind of fun and entertaining. You know, I'm really
disappointed we got one more charter, guest, Uh, we have
one more episode left?
Speaker 2: There we go, that's the word.
Speaker 1: And somehow I must have misinterpreted the footage. I thought
for sure Joe the Hoe was gonna make up with Kathy. Yeah,
and that is definitely not going to happen.
Speaker 2: No, I don't think so, But I mean I'm still
like fingers crossed. I mean, you never know what could happen.
These are your thoughts.
Speaker 1: Well, it was kind of working its way. I saw
the breakup of Max and Kathy, and then I saw
that Kizzy, you know, that whole big tote thing. She
was gonna be off the boat, and I'm like, of course,
of course, like away for one goddamn day. They can't
stay away from each other, right, So that's not gonna happen.
They kissed and made up. That sucks. Yeah, So, all
in all, a horrible episode. Like most seasons, these things
ended with a whimper. Sure, so, but I thought it
was a decent season overall. I'm going to give it
to fourteen pots.
Speaker 2: Yeah. We that's what differentiates us from other shows we
do ts Eliot on this show. Okay, how many pots
do you give it?
Speaker 1: Fourteen?
Speaker 2: Okay? So I want to talk about this kind of
collective gas lighting that we as a as a culture
have swallowed, like a sugar pill or like forest fed cream,
like a fucking fog arragos, whatever metaphor you want to use,
the softening of legitimate murderers and criminals. They all have
podcasts now, right, So Sady the Bowl, Gravano and Franceza
and all these guys that have killed their friends, rat
it on their friends, racketeered, you know, gone up to
people with small businesses and bedsty and you know, grabbed
their shirt collar and said, I need you to take
money away from your family and give it to me.
Speaker 1: It's like all this fucking they romanticize.
Speaker 2: Yeah, all this fucking disgusting shit, and now iHeart Radio
is just hosting their podcast and it's like so sorry,
So so I'm confused.
Speaker 1: Like Sammy, I'm looking at your resume here, so you
did six years and okay, yeah, it says here in
your resume you killed nineteen people.
Speaker 2: I'm excited for episode seven because once we get there,
you'll be wearing the wire to incriminate the guy that
you killed your cousin with. So that'll be really exciting.
That'll be a good one, And I think weight Watchers
is going to do a big buy for that episode.
So it's like, what's going on?
Speaker 1: Actually, what's fascinating because I have listened to an episode
because I was going to make fun of them on PMZ.
The casualness with which he describes the murders is chilling.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he knew it was coming, so we just set
the quiet and then I shot him in the fucking face.
Speaker 1: And then like he'll have like a guest like that
doesn't know anything, Like the nerdest on is like, hey, yeah,
what's it like when you kill someone? They don't even
know when It's like it's not like the movies. You know,
they just go down. It's like they go to bed,
you know, they go to sleep.
Speaker 2: Jeremy Piven and Doug Allen are just massive good Fellas fans,
all right, So so yeah, these you know, we call
them salami people. I'm not sure we're rather annoying none more. No,
one's more annoying than Nate. Right now, Nate is driving
me nuts.
Speaker 1: Okay, let me ask you why because he got under
my skin a little bit too.
Speaker 2: Are you asking why? Yes? Because, Okay, got it. So
Nate has mistreated women. This is just a short stint
to go from what we're witnessing. So this Dalai Lama
transformation into this Arthurian character is really like miss me
with the bullshit and layoff Joe right because we're trying
to hate Joe. We're trying to be entertained by his
sexcapades and his mistreatment of women. Now, it is very
sad that in his wake is heartbreak, but it's a
TV show. So Nate, take your puritanical shit that you
don't even buy all the way and go hang out
with Gail. Okay, let Joe fuck whoever the fuck he
wants to have sex with.
Speaker 1: Okay, exactly, Okay, exact seven. We are on the same page. Okay,
there is one charter left. Let the kids play Nate.
At this point, I know your new found being an adult,
a mature adult who's found love, and now you're saying
that you probably can't hang out with guys that are
still engaging this type of behavior.
Speaker 2: Please.
Speaker 1: I had a buddy during COVID, you know, he was
all masked up and whatnot, and he came over my house.
Speaker 2: Well you gotta be safe.
Speaker 1: Oh no, no, we of course okay, And but we're
like a year into this and we were still going
out to bars, you know, doing the mass thing, but
eating in between bites. So one day on a Sunday,
he's over my house. He's got the mask on. We're
watching a football game, you know, he's pulling it down
to eat potato chips or whatnot, and like, hey, take
that thing off. And he's like, noa, no, man, you
gotta be safe and something excited.
Speaker 2: I'm excited to find out how this ties back. Oh yeah.
Speaker 1: I had to remind him that we had gone to
Laurel Tavern the week before. He met a girl that
he knew for thirty minutes, took her home and tossed
her salad. Yeah, quite the hippocrat. You know, hypocrisy, dude,
you're you met a girl for thirty minutes and ate
her ass.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And honestly, like people, you know, we got very
very preoccupied with the airborne transfer of COVID. But I mean,
and I don't know. I honestly, I think that this
is why people have it out for Fauci. He did
not mention at all any kind of rectal transfer. And
if you had novel coronavirus SARS V two, you knew
that there was a gas intestinal torrent that came along
with that. So it was in the intestines, it was,
it was everywhere.
Speaker 1: So you're defending my friend. No, I'm not defending your friend.
Speaker 2: I think he acted very responsibly, but we really didn't
know what to do back then, and we just had
to be safe enough. Oh, by the way, I saw
Tiger King. Actually that guy met a lover in prison,
So good for Exotic Joe or whatever his name is.
Speaker 1: He should burn in hell. Actually he was pretty cruel
to animals.
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Speaker 1: I can, I can. I can start us off for sure. Well,
Max and Kathy, you know, they meet in Galli right
before going to bed and they have a little chit
chat because you know, she went down to go get
those that food that they were thrown at her. And
the chat doesn't go very we really really quickly.
Speaker 2: And I don't think that we and I apologize to
you for cutting you off. I don't think that we
paid enough mind last week to how abhorrent the behavior
on display from Joe and Nathan were. Okay, dolly lama,
you want to talk about, you know, moralism and stuff
like that when people are drinking and there is an
uber order that is delivered to the boat, and you
too thrash away at it like fucking raccoons. Irrespective of
the specificity of what certain people want. When you have
a woman who has been drinking and orders chicken nuggets,
do not eat her fucking nuggets.
Speaker 1: Or worse, waste them by chucking them.
Speaker 2: By chucking them, I mean, just the slovenly behavior.
Speaker 1: It's just I do believe we touched on that, and
that is in fact a crime. Oh yeah, but back
to the galley, these two, uh, they want different things
still in clearly Max and Caine. Oh my god. Yeah,
he wants an emotionally fulfilling relationship and she wanted flash
flash frozen. Why can't I.
Speaker 2: Talk about that flash fos She.
Speaker 1: Wanted flash frozen. Rat droppings artificially colored.
Speaker 2: To mimic death all rat droppings. Okay, so let's just
be fair and let's be frank. I there is a
presence of rat dropping though how could there not be.
Speaker 1: That's what I'm saying. Yeah, I want to taste chicken
McNuggets from nineteen eighty two when I was six verse
what they are now. They have to be drastically different.
Speaker 2: Drastically different. The ones in eighty two were probably so
much better what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying. So
I think what Kathy wants is to take Max off
the boat, get a hostel, get a hotel room for
a couple of days, eat some toap us, drink some wine.
Maybe tuck into one another's butts, don't I don't care
what you can sending adults to behind closed doors. But
after that she wants to go home to the UK
and she does not want to see Max after that.
Speaker 1: Deil, I love where you're going with this because I
think you and I are seen potty cup, because we've
all been there. Someone is ready to nail you down
for a relationship, right, but you weren't ready to settle down.
Maybe you've just broken up with someone, or you're still
wanting to play the field, but you want to hang
out with someone for a little while because you're lonely.
You like the companionship and this person is really good
at Pj's, and they're really good in a special way
that you know. She likes to tweak your right test
hole with her thought as she.
Speaker 2: Flicks stop stop. But yeah, it's e pray queef. I
mean they just want to have a fun. She wants
to have a little fun vacation.
Speaker 1: That's what I was saying.
Speaker 2: Kind of all right, So we move on to And
and Max. Like, I feel bad being harsh about Max
because Max is a very lovable character. He's very goofy.
But when you dip into like the things get a
little bit too heavy with Max, and then it starts
to get like not so fun, Like Max driving very
quickly and ignoring Nathan. That's funny, Max getting pissed off
about the nuggets funny. But then we take it to
like his behavior is manipulative and demonstrably it's and and
her behavior is is a betrayal of what actual commitment,
and it's like, bro, calm the fuck down.
Speaker 1: I'll distell it. It's controlling. Yeah, so even if they
walk off this boat into the sunset and agree to
be a couple, what happens the first time she says
she wants to go out with her girlfriends and doesn't
call him on riting.
Speaker 2: Yeah what happens?
Speaker 1: Yeah, so yeah I don't like this.
Speaker 2: Yeah, really good point. Okay, so we get to the
final trip of the season. We're going to be what
drum roll stock of the dock?
Speaker 1: Ah yes, yes, yes, yes.
Speaker 2: Sorry. Max continues with the drama and says that he
needs to this is one of these big things to
say about this, this thing where people are throwing chicken
nuggets at you because you're all essentially like glorified college
roommates right now. So that's kind of the the timber
of this environment. He says, I need to protect myself
from her. And it's just not that serious, right, you know,
you guys are summer camp. So the New York Times
best selling author h is the daughter of Sonny the
Bull Gravano, and I mean, god, talk about a cottage
industry of interest in that. Can you imagine reading that book?
You know, we were having we were having Sunday supper.
There was gravy with veal and dad walked in. He
was covered in blood, but nobody asked any questions. It's
like just seventeen chapters of that.
Speaker 1: I mean, all the stories begin and end with that
and then they all chuckle like you.
Speaker 2: Know that apologize to the Italian Americans.
Speaker 1: No, you don't need to.
Speaker 2: Ok.
Speaker 1: They hate these people too because it makes them look bad,
like every movie about Italians involves a hit like No Italians,
ninety nine point nine of them don't live like this.
It's just that's their representation in cinema. It's like these
that's why these knuckleheads are so generic.
Speaker 2: So I know actual Italians, and no one's a lesser
fan of these people than actual Italians.
Speaker 1: That's what I'm saying. So I love how later on,
to get ahead of myself, they're like, oh, we've been
on a yacht. My dad got one because some you know,
some uh holding a bunch of money, and then you know,
he drove the boat around and then he had to
go to work because you know, we had to bury
two dead bodies. And then aha that we all laugh.
Oh that's great.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, Well also that goes to shit, like I
guess just the pridefulness of being a moron, like thinking
that you could just get behind the wheel of a
yacht and not cause catastrophic damage, right save with the bowl.
So anyways, Kizzy breaks her toe and bodaceous tatas come
aboard the vessel. Her words, not man. So the primary says,
are you ready for the New Yorkers? And we welcome
the New Yorkers to the boat, and we say you're
not fucking going anywhere. Now, Joe is struggling. He promised
to be that he would not kiss Kissy, but he
had no allegiance to her when they were a thing.
Now they're not a thing. So any promises that he's made,
really at any point in there knowing one another, mean
absolutely nothing. And he's going to try to fuck Kissie tomorrow.
Speaker 1: By the way, these two there are having way too
much fun with this. Y they they're enjoying the tension.
Speaker 2: Yep, yep. They're not good people.
Speaker 1: And as you and I put it out last episode,
they will last exactly one weekend in a hotel with
each other and then part ways. It knows.
Speaker 2: I mean, maybe they could even get to like two
two and a half months, but listen, nobody's perfect. The guests.
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh, I was gonna say, dude, we have Sandy
in the galley by the way, with Josh to check
in on the the plating.
Speaker 2: Well, yeah, no, I hadn't covered that.
Speaker 1: Oh, go ahead, I'm sorry, No, no, no, I missed it.
Speaker 2: It's not in my notes.
Speaker 1: Oh I was gonna say.
Speaker 2: I'm in a bit of a fugue state right now.
Speaker 1: Sandy checks well, first checks in on Cheffy, and Dominic's
there too, you know, and you're a loser.
Speaker 3: Now, why the fuck is she here? Doesn't she need
to pretend like she's driving the boat. Well, she's checking
on her TikTok fans. By the way, by the way,
you're still a loser.
Speaker 2: You're a loser.
Speaker 1: I want to point somebody out.
Speaker 2: I do too.
Speaker 1: I want to point something out to our listeners, the Barnacles,
who've been listening to us for seven years. Sandy used
to be in the galley every episode sometimes, yeah, multiple times.
I want to point out that it was our relentless
ball busting that drove her that part of the show.
It was us, and you are welcome.
Speaker 2: You're a loser. Okay. So the guests are very upset,
and they're being very guido about the whole thing.
Speaker 1: So, by the way, their accents they are unterrible.
Speaker 2: Okay, So they go, hey, why don't you get Sandy
down here. We'll make her an offer real quick.
Speaker 1: By the way, I love guess Marissa. As a result
of a Google weather search, she's upgraded herself from a privileged,
foul mouth white trash back to a meteorologist and wants
to know why the boat ain't moving. Okay, good, good, good,
call me.
Speaker 2: Sonny Storms and get your ass down here. Let me
tell you something. Here's what we're gonna do. We're gonna
get this boat out of here and we're gonna move out.
We're gonna move that into the fucking ocean because I'm
looking at my weather app and it says it's seventy
three fucking degrees.
Speaker 1: Okay, I think we can move. By the way, this
is the kind of shit that gets people killed. Like,
you don't think that guy in the helicopter, it was
Kobe Bryant back there, and he's thinking like I normally
wouldn't fly in this type of weather, but it is
Kobe and he wants to go somewhere. And you don't
think Kobe. I know I'm talking out on my ass,
but probably said, hey man, we really need to get there.
And that's what did it?
Speaker 2: I mean?
Speaker 1: And Aliyah, like twenty years ago, like the pilot was like, hey,
that guy's three hundred pounds, Like, well, that's my manager.
Like all right, and we all know how that ended.
You get idiots like this and Sammy if he was
on this boat, he's got a gun on the table. Hey,
I think we should go out right right right?
Speaker 2: So yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. The wants, the irresponsible wants
of the clientele override safety. Right.
Speaker 1: So anyway, these goombas they call Sandy down to the table.
That's a fine word. Sorry to say that, goomba. Yeah,
I don't even know what it means, but I know
it's insulting to put.
Speaker 2: Those little ship piles from Mario.
Speaker 1: Oh is it really?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah? Oh good.
Speaker 1: It's a video game, all right.
Speaker 2: So now, oh, do you want Caitlin to play the
Godfather music?
Speaker 1: Well, we will get there, okay, Okay. So they asked
to speak to Sandy to give her an offer she
can't refuse, right, So they come down there and they
they go, we got one offer for you move the boat.
Speaker 2: Yeah, real, fucking Luca Brazi, this one.
Speaker 1: This is what Sandy should have did. I'm gonna be
saying here playing that music, will you killin? I got
an offer for you. If you don't shut your.
Speaker 2: Fat it really quickly, we'll get flagged for it.
Speaker 1: Oh we will, but it doesn't who cares.
Speaker 2: It'll be limited, It doesn't matter.
Speaker 1: I don't need the music, everybody, but no, no, play the music.
Speaker 2: I polo. Let's start it out. Let's Yeah.
Speaker 1: If you don't shut your fat pizzoli cheeseball eating fucking
pie hole face, I'm gonna throw you off this boat.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: How do you like those apples?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Goombah? She called Sandy.
Speaker 1: No, no, no, that was Sandy talking to them. Oh that's
how you talk to these people. They they that's how
you get their respect.
Speaker 2: M I'm gonna watch this movie tonight.
Speaker 1: Which one?
Speaker 2: I like one? I like one? I there's can you
turn down? Please? There's no actually can you turn it up?
There's no denying that two is a masterpiece, right because if.
Speaker 1: The Empire strikes back of Mafia for the scenes.
Speaker 2: Of New York and the San Genio thing is just
like amazing. But there is this thing where it gets
very convoluted when they do that hit on, Uh, who's
the guy that sounds like that? And they say like
Corleoni did this, and it gets very convoluted.
Speaker 1: You're just like, this is back in time, this is
in present time.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: You sure they're not going to pull this down off
Apple podcasts. This is more of a YouTube thing, right,
It's more of a you can turn it down. I
don't get us in trouble.
Speaker 2: Yeah, anyways, it's a masterpiece. In the comments, let us
know what's your favorite one?
Speaker 3: Uh?
Speaker 2: One, two, three? Or are you more of a megalopolis person?
Speaker 1: Oh wow, you know that guys like selling cars now
because he lost so much money.
Speaker 2: Francis Ford Coppola that guy, yeah, that guy. Yeah, well
there's a documentary about the making of it. Oh yeah,
I didn't want to watch the movie, so I don't
want to watch the I walked out of the movie.
Speaker 1: You did.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah?
Speaker 1: Was that bad?
Speaker 2: Oh? Was that bad? I was like, we're not doing this.
But anyways, we're getting sidetracked. So Sandy Hatch is a
really good idea. She says, take the salami out there
and show him how how wavy it is. If they drowned,
they drown. So Max is meditating on his love and
this is where we get the story that one time
this guy owed my father money, so we got a
big boat and yeah, that's hilarious. So we get to
lunch and it's uh, tomato and ricotta, which is kind
of a it's a it's a looser version of the kuprazy,
And then we get homemade for kata. Then we get
chickory and quail eggs. That's a salad. And we get
steak and zucchini. Now, hey, Josh, are you.
Speaker 1: Is this is this family style again? I thought we
talked about this.
Speaker 3: Yeah, are your ears clogged with flowery asshole?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, you know, this reminds me of one of
the great teachers of my life. Mister Fritz, my my
twelfth grade lit teacher.
Speaker 1: Is this the guy who let you down in later years?
Speaker 2: No, No, mister Fritz never let me down. He introduced
me to Wicked, he introduced me to the Dubliners. I mean,
he's just incredible. But he was so passionate about reading
and literature that when we were in I would say
April of senior year, you know, people were really fucking off.
We were in colleges, we were done. We were playing
Mario card and the senior patio. And what did mister
Fritz do. He came out there and he unplugged the TV,
and he said, you guys have work on the iliad
to do. And I know that, and while I appreciate
the conviction, it's a little bit too late. We're not
changing up family style, right. We've got three more fucking
meals to go, Sandy, Okay, let Josh play the Nintendo.
Speaker 1: I agree? I agree. What are we doing here?
Speaker 2: It's like crazy? You know what?
Speaker 1: Sorry, you just triggered a story of my pastor senior year.
They used to like know and just give.
Speaker 2: Us some time to reminisce for a second, please.
Speaker 1: It triggers so many memories on my education. Our school.
They knew who the dumb kids were, and I was
one of Oh for sure, yeah, and they'd separate us.
So I was in dumb English, which meant kind of
an easy pass senior year. It was called dumb English class.
And they didn't even bother attempting to teach us.
Speaker 2: It wasn't no, it was.
Speaker 1: And so what they did is English class was we
just watched movies. Oh really, no English, no spelling, no
book reading. They'd roll in a television and they'd play
us good movies and then we talk about that. That
was dumb English.
Speaker 2: Wow. The entire year. They turned it into a film class.
Speaker 1: Film class.
Speaker 2: That's great.
Speaker 1: Watch one flew Over the Cucko's Nest.
Speaker 2: Great movie Breaking Out, Oh.
Speaker 1: Starring Daniel Stern. He got in a little trouble this week.
Speaker 2: He did check it out at PMZ Picture dot Com
such another podcast network. That was a great PMZ, really
really good PMZ. You know, speaking of gangster films and
that PMZ actually pat dm Joe Peshy.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I asked him if his ex wife ever tried
to hire a hitman to kill him. Because she tried
to hire a I am going to kill her next husband. Yeah,
it's a great story.
Speaker 2: It's a really there's a lot of twists to that tale.
Well let's get back to the show. Sure, So Sandy's pissed.
The Melas family still and she's pissed. So Max talks
to Joe about He goes to Joe for a little
bit of advice on romance, which is a little bit. Uh,
it's kind of like, and this is crude, but again,
I'm a little sick and my brain power is just
not It's like going to Adolf Hitler for advice on
how to be nice to people. Know, he's just not
a nice guy.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Later on, it's even more diabolical when he tries
to plant in Nate's head about Gail going surfing with guys. Yeah,
you're a little worried about her cheating on you, Hey, asshole,
don't try and glom on her what you do? Yes, scumback.
That's a horrible right there. Yeah, but yeah, he basically says,
a yea yea. You know, dating, that's it's like tryouts,
you know, you try them out.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, I think I'm gonna fuck Kizzy tomorrow night.
So anyways, v has grown strides. I'm proud of it.
I'm happy for her. We don't need it on TV.
No one cares.
Speaker 1: Her storylined ended eight episodes.
Speaker 2: Ago, and and that's sad. Like I love the She's
obviously the heart of the deck crew. Everyone else is
a fucking lunatic or a scumbag. Anyways, So Joe and
Joe and Kizzie, this.
Speaker 1: Was my absolute favorite part of the episode. Okay, please, okay.
So Joe and Kizzie they are just they want to
get at each other.
Speaker 2: Oh my god.
Speaker 1: So they're hanging out in the eating hall or the gally,
whatever the hell you want to call that, and they're
sitting next to each other, and after discussing the craziest
place they'd ever had sex, they realized their soulmates get that, right,
and they make a pack after six years if they're
not if they're still single, they're gonna get married, right.
And I was thinking this might sound crazy to you
and Kaitlin, but that's the identical conversation that my wife
and I had once and then we came down off
of acid and then realized drugs made us say absolutely
stupid things.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, no, acid'll really it's a loopy
kind of experience.
Speaker 1: Yeah, definitely makes you say really dumb things.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, yeah. But I think they're talking about the
craziest places they've ever had sex. Uh huh, Like enough,
let's get to you know, they're kind of conversational for play.
And again this I'm a little loopy right now, so
this may not be a good analogy, but it's like,
let's just get to it already, right, so I can't
stand and the anticipation. Let's just see what happens. So
it's a little bit like Marvel is dropping these teasers.
H Marvel's dropping these teasers for this big, big new
movie that's coming out, right, and they drop this teaser
and it and it ends with the Wakandon's and Fantastic
Four will be an Avengers Doom day. It's like, I
don't give a shit. Okay, that's that sounds horrible, but
let's just get to it. Okay, I'm tired of hearing
about it. The Wakandon's and the Fantastic Four will be
an Avengers Doomsday. I mean, you gotta be kidding me
with this shit. Robert Downey Junior is just gonna play
a bad guy.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's so Is that something that's really happening?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Oh Kayln nodded, and he nodded in like yeah,
it's bad.
Speaker 1: By the way, how about when like an actor like
Jason Momoa, he played like Aquaman and now he's some
like bad guy in like still in the same like
universe playing a different This is so stupid.
Speaker 2: Are there are there not enough actors? I mean, Marvel,
it's just bad business. You know what Robert Downey Junior costs, right,
Just get somebody else to do it.
Speaker 1: It's just another idiot reading lines in front of a camera.
Speaker 2: It's crazy.
Speaker 1: Hey, By the way, craziest place I ever had sex.
You guys, tell me which one is crazier. Yeah, a
washing machine while it's in full operation in it on it, okay?
Or a rock.
Speaker 2: Uh? Yeah, I've never done it. Too crazy. I'm trying
to think the side of a road. There you go. Yeah,
traffic zooming by. Yeah, not a care in the world.
We're just young, you know. Can you imagine that, being
so so young and so horny that you need to
pull the car over?
Speaker 1: Oh god, we we can't wait, what could we?
Speaker 2: We cannot make it to this destination. We have to
pull over. Oh god, that is so crazy, these young kids. Okay,
So Nathan sees them flirting and is really pissed and
he's trying to force Joe not to do anything with Kissy.
And now we're gonna be a little repetitive here, but
fuck off. Yeah, okay, we get to the bubble bath.
There's too many bubbles in the bubble bath and that
was a fun moment.
Speaker 1: Also earned the title of the episode, whilst being one
of the more inconsequential.
Speaker 2: What was the title of the episode bubbles, tubbles or something,
I don't know, bubbles doubles. That's like that that's a
horrible thing, I know. All right, So Nathan calls Gail.
She doesn't answer, but I think this is where is
this where Joe goes? She might be sucking somebody else.
A little later, well, Nate polishes off a chart. What
is this? Boss's off a chart? What does that mean?
All right, let's get ready for the pajama Okay.
Speaker 1: Max attempts to speak with Kathy, but she gets called
up to put on pajamas or something.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1: So we get to dinner, well not before uh Cassey
announces to the entire crew that of her and Joe's
plans of the future, and then v over here.
Speaker 2: Is that's cute? So I think, Dominic, what.
Speaker 1: Do you say?
Speaker 2: I can't do? Dominic mean, son of a bitch. Well
he's he's Josh jas If you want a plated meal,
this is gonna be the best plated meal that you're
ever gonna have. No, it's not. It's gonna suck. They're
gonna hate it. You're a loser. He's so goddamn mean.
All right, So everyone's gonna be happy except for Dominic.
So this is where we gotta talk casting. I love
Josh as a person, I think he's a sweet guy. Yeah,
let's talk about Josh, and let's talk about Chef Adam.
So Chef Josh, nice guy, good at cooking, not remarkably
good or bad one way or the other, right Adam. Oh,
but sticking with Josh not a romantic interest for anybody, unfortunately,
and kind of sequestered into goofy isms.
Speaker 1: I told you I could have done a makeover for him,
like by the second episode, I would have gotten him
coach doc.
Speaker 2: Yeah. So now let's go over to Adam, who we
remember defiantly put onions in people's food because of them,
because he has such disdain for the wealthy. He fucked Malia,
got involved in a love triangle with serious animosity towards
another man, almost physically confronted him because of it.
Speaker 1: Broke Jenna's heart from sailing.
Speaker 2: What do we want on our show? Right? So it's
almost like you literally cannot hire people that are not
going to be romantic interest to other people on the boat.
You just cannot do it, simply cannot. Everyone has to
be hot enough and single enough to be available because
when that happens, And I don't mean to be like pervy.
It's not about that that's where so much of the
conflict in this show comes from. This is a little
truncated real world at sea. We need to have that
kind of shit going on.
Speaker 1: I might disagree with you. The dynamic is just all
these different personalities. Sometimes you have a chef that's just
an asshole, right right right, And I like the change
up a lot. You never know what you're gonna get. Like,
it's like a box of chocolate's man.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and this one is orange and cream, which everybody hates. Yeah,
and my grandmother likes it, but she's dead, so it doesn't.
It's not a good chocolate. And but again we love
Josh all right.
Speaker 1: So first course, by the way, do you wait right
before service to ask if people like oysters?
Speaker 2: Great question, bad move. So he heads up asks who
likes oysters? Half the table does, and he serves an
oyster dish with pickled blackberries and a horse radish grenita.
The two little gobba gouls didn't really like it. Can
you imagine dating one of these little demons?
Speaker 1: We might have to worry about being murdered.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a good point. Joe and Nathan here will
breaking dinner. This is where we talk about whether Gail
is being faithful to Nathan who's not her boyfriend. And yeah,
it's a really seedy, kind of manipulative thing that Joe does.
And it's the mark of somebody who's not a friend
and not someone who's interested in your well being. The
next dish is annulody with King Crab, No truffle, it's
not in season, doesn't matter, doesn't matter to gobble Goal.
They want more crab and they want truffle out of season.
Find the hounds, send them to the forest, have them poisoned,
doesn't matter. Get me the truffle. I'm hungry now. Max
wants to go down, despite Sandy saying that you guys
have to stay up, and we get to Leah coming
to see miss Yawn and speaking of yan.
Speaker 1: Yan, who gives a shit.
Speaker 2: The little Meatballs do not really like dinner. But I
think there were kind of funny. This is where there's
a little charisma to how confrontational these people are. You know,
you want to do an impression of what the meatballs
talking to Josh about it.
Speaker 1: I don't think.
Speaker 2: Okay, okay, Calin, yes, okay. So we had to sleep
and Kizzy has a problem. Her toe is searing pain,
and this is putting the charter in danger.
Speaker 1: I kind of felt had she taken like three eyebrew broken, yeah,
she could have made it through this without having to
go to shore.
Speaker 2: Yeah I don't know. I mean she could have a sprain,
she could have a break.
Speaker 1: There's nothing you can do when you break a toe.
Speaker 2: No, No, we're bipedal. What are you gonna do? Walk
on your heel like a duck. I don't even think
they walk on heels. I think they have heels.
Speaker 1: By the way, is it called ergonomics, like how you
kind of your body will fit?
Speaker 2: Ergonomics is when the keyboard is designed kind of like
the panel of like a Death Star employee.
Speaker 1: Okay, so here's my point. Why did we not make
round edges for like things like the corner.
Speaker 2: Of everything should be round?
Speaker 1: It should be round. Why do we screw ourselves? You
know how many fucking times I've broken my pinky toe.
The thing turns purple. I'm waiting for it to just
fall off one day.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, yeah, it gets gangrenous, and you go, I'm
not going to the doctor. It'll sort itself out.
Speaker 1: I honestly thought, like, why not just have it removed, right,
it just causes trouble.
Speaker 2: Well, and that's not even to say. I mean, think
of the children. I mean, we've got kids crawling around.
I mean, you're you're making pointed tables. Everything should be round,
thank you. You know who thought that the uh the
just seminal talent Kanye West said that things are too square.
Everything should be round. Wow, And everyone was like, this
guy really is a genius.
Speaker 1: He's got a great idea.
Speaker 2: He thought he has amazing ideas. Not really, Uh so
we had we Yeah. So Josh is up to he's
stirring because the demon's in his head. Really just one
demon is telling him that he's not doing good enough.
We've all been there self doubt. So Kizzy is crying.
Max is sorry for yesterday, and he and Kathy boyfriend
and girlfriend, have a little healing chat, you know the
kind when you're in a little bit of a route
with your your girlfriend or your boyfriend. So Kizzy heads
up to the bridge and her toe looks like one
of the daughters, and Sandy says, you have to go
get an X ray. So we're going to the beach
for a picnic, and Josh is freaking out. He wants
to nail the dinner tonight, so he is going to.
Speaker 3: Fotch Dominic, wake up your assholes to do today, which
means you have another chance to deliver a big sea
mine as you have to fail.
Speaker 2: You. Yeah, not an f C minus. Dominic knows how
to cut and cut deep, so Sandy not Sandy. Josh says,
I'm not I'm not gonna go to the beach. I
can't cut sand which is in half. U see, rats
can do that. We've seen this before many times from chefs,
and Kathy is really really not happy about it. But
before we get there, the gwed ads talk about how.
Speaker 1: Feminism is destroying men.
Speaker 2: Wow. Yeah, yeah, it's amazing, how fragile men are. That
feminism is destroying us, It's crazy. But then Kizzy heads
out and she says that she has chlemytier or something
and longs for a night that might not happen.
Speaker 1: Well, how about Joe. Yeah, he sees her depart, and
he doesn't utter the words I hope.
Speaker 2: She's okay or yeah, I.
Speaker 1: Hope it's nothing serious. Instead, he says, I hope this
isn't the last time I get to see her, implying
that he he hopes he still gets the porker. His words,
not mine implied.
Speaker 2: Not his words actually not holding up in a court
of law, very indelicate. So Josh is not at the beach,
and because of that, Kathy has to dress the salad
and she's pissed.
Speaker 1: Who needs who needs directions?
Speaker 2: She's Kathy's funny this lunch they can't pack. Yeah, she goes,
do you want any almonds? They go, what's that for?
She goes, it's everything. Line of the day. Yeah, you
just put it on everything everything.
Speaker 1: Oh.
Speaker 2: Max goes to sleep again and Nathan didn't tell him
to go down, but fuck it, I need to sleep.
Kizzy is coming back, and we wrap with Kathy and
Josh passive aggressively feuding with one another, but more importantly
Joe and Nathan, who have a little chat where Joe,
in no uncertain terms, says, you know, I know you
told me to keep it in my pants. I intend
not to. I actually intend on putting it in her pants,
and Nathan is repulsed.
Speaker 1: Let it go, Nate, let it go, Let it go,
let it go.
Speaker 2: It's just rats having sex. Let it go, doesn't fucking matter.
That was pretty good, not bad, good tone, thank you.
Speaker 1: You know, season finale, Nate and Joe the Hoe get
into it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's gonna be really nice.
Speaker 1: I'd argue, why waste your breath, but I'm not a
c rat.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Nathan gets Nathan is so righteous in the way
that he sees the good and bad of this world
that he's gonna punch Joe in the face for not
abiding by it. It's crazy. No, I do think v
will be very, very heartbroken. It'll be tough for Nate
to see. So we'll see what happens in the finale.
Get in the comments. Let us know what you thought
about the episode. Uh, if you're an Italian American, how
how did we do?
Speaker 1: We had your back.
Speaker 2: For sure. Let us know your favorite cold cuts. Whatever.
We love you guys for supporting the show and listening.
Tell your friends, Tell your family, steal credit cards, got
a pictureon dot com, slash on the podcast network. Don't
you a little or a little more. I'm done saying
goodbye Pat, Say goodbye Kaylen