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Speaker 1: Good morning from Hell.

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Speaker 2: I am Chris, and I'm dead and my eternal punishment

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is to do this podcast where we interview everyone in

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the afterlife, and I'm joined as always by the younger

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brother of Satan, Clayton.

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Speaker 1: Oh, how do you do? How's it going? Everybody?

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Speaker 2: Tis the season?

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Speaker 1: YadA, YadA, YadA.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, hello everyone. Well it's pretty hot here in Hell,

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but it is up on Earth December, so yeah, it's

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the festive time of year.

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Speaker 1: I just wish we could get a little bit of that.

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You know. I am feeling a little bit blue despite

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my skin tone, which is red red. Yes, of course,

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you know.

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Speaker 3: I just like I wouldn't mind every now and then

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having like a bit of a snow day.

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Speaker 1: I know Hell has frozen over a couple of times.

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You know, we've seen that. But I'm really going in

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all in this hockey thing, Chris.

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Speaker 3: You know, it's tough when you want to play hockey

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and there's just no ice.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, this is it impact in the game because it's

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at double hockey sticks. That's the team, right.

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Speaker 1: Yes, yes, Hell's hockey team, and we've grown in numbers.

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Speaker 3: I actually have a list of people who have bought

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the new Hell hockey jersey over a torn from Hell.

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We've got heart Christian, which we're gonna have some issues

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for Christian.

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Speaker 1: You know, he's gonna crisis his name. Alex Steven, William, Perry,

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Adam and Matt. Matt made his name off caps.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Are Christians allowed in Hell?

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Speaker 4: No?

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Speaker 3: But this one's I think he's gonna be the exception

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to rule. So way to go, Christian, Welcome to the team.

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That's a pretty good tape.

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Speaker 2: Stuff y'all play against, like Heaven and the Norse gods

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and stuff. It's kind of like that movie where the

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what is it the go ahead? Yeah, the movie Don't

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pull up by Him TV, the Bob's Letting movie.

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Speaker 1: I was gonna ask.

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Speaker 3: If you were talking about Cool Runnings, but I thought

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surely he's not so stupid that he would compare it

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to cool Running.

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Speaker 2: It's like cool Runnings where it's like you're in Hell

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trying to play hockey but you don't have ice.

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Speaker 3: So yeah, and I'm also Jamaican, so no, I'm not.

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I don't know, Chris, do you know of anybody that

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I could like get to like make me ice, Like

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I just need a rink, like a skating rink.

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Speaker 1: That's all I really need.

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Speaker 2: You know, you could try a straight hockey. Is that

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kind of lame? Stupid? That's bad because you want the blades.

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You want to be able to.

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Speaker 1: Like right, cut people, yeah, slice their throats and ship.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Are there any like magic wizards that can cast like

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freezing powers or shit like that.

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Speaker 2: I don't know. There are in fantasy books I used

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to read, and like what throw me some There's a

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lot of stuff in like the Tolkien universe. And then okay,

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that's nerdy shit. Move on from Oh, there's a Game

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of Throne White Walkers, and there's Tales from the Stinky Dragon.

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There's a lot of magic in that stupid show. Bad

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show sucks. Yeah, and then I think on a show

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called Ruby, there's like some ice stuff.

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Speaker 3: Stop talking about rooster teeth. We got to move on

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from rooster teeth? What else do we got? What else

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do we got? I just need like a magic iceman

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that's not like the X Men.

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Speaker 2: Character magic ice. That's not xcellent character. You know.

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Speaker 3: I mean, if people are seeing this episode, and they

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probably already know who's the guest, you know, because they

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saw the ty episode, So we should just cut to

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the chase and just see who it is.

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Speaker 2: Okay, well what about Frosty the Snowman, Frosty Snowman, O kay, yeah,

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I mean he's like topical, you know, like it's a

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holiday seasons probably around.

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Speaker 3: He's got a song. He's got a song pop might

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be royalty free, Uppy. We could test it.

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Speaker 2: See if we get a copyright strike, see if we

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get a seasoned desist. If it's royalty free. We'll find

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out right now, Frosty.

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Speaker 1: And then there's words.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, you know, I think I could teleport him

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in here really quick. I mean he's probably not busy, right, yeah,

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what does he do? Just like playing with kids, creepy.

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We don't need more of that on the streets. Okay,

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let's just summon them here, all right, Frosty the Snowman.

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Speaker 5: Merry Christmas.

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Speaker 3: Whoa, oh my god, heyly hot in here.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, he's sizzling.

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Speaker 2: Geez oh oh the steam, Oh.

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Speaker 1: My god, holy moly, it is so hot.

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Speaker 2: Hi.

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Speaker 3: Oh Frosty, hey, Frosty, Oh your twigs, your little arm

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twigs have caught on fire.

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Speaker 2: Frosty.

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Speaker 4: Oh this is You would think that they don't have

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any nerves, but this is really incredibly paint.

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Speaker 2: Oh the coal in your eyes, Oh my god, they're

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like on fire.

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Speaker 5: Do I look mad?

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Speaker 1: I'm not mad.

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Speaker 2: I'm disappointed at how hot this is.

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Speaker 5: Oh my god, who are you people?

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Speaker 2: So Frosty. We're just here to see if you can

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help us do a little Christmas miracle.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, we're in hell. Yeah, welcome to hell.

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Speaker 3: Okay, whoa, I'm barely able to talk anymore.

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Speaker 1: Frosty, keep it together, man, keep it together.

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Speaker 5: I'm trying my best.

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Speaker 1: I'm really melting down here.

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Speaker 2: Oh.

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Speaker 1: His nose is roasted and starting to slip off. I

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don't know, Oh god, why would you do this to me?

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Why we didn't really think it through.

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Speaker 3: I didn't know that this is gonna happen. Oh my god,

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this interview is going really well so far. I mean,

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tell us about yourself.

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Speaker 1: I can't talk. I don't have any mouth parts. Why

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did you do this to someone? Okay, Chris, go get

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that bucket. You gotta keep all these parts together.

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Speaker 3: Oh god, Rosty, are you with us? Kind of keep

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it together? Man, We're gonna get you back in no time.

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Speaker 2: It's okay. We just wanted to have a quickly, little

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fun interview with you. And cyah.

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Speaker 1: Oh, oh god, he's like fully water.

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Speaker 2: Oh god, it's just like a son in here. It's

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just I felt the steam. I felt like a hand

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gripping mind trying to hold on. Yeah, and then it

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just disappeared. I think we lost him. Yeah, I think

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he's dead now. Oh my god, that was brutal. I

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was traumatizing.

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Speaker 3: So sorry listeners at home, we might have killed your childhood. Like,

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this is not much of a hero. I don't think

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anybody looks at a Frosty like a hero. But he's

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definitely a figure of sorts, an icon. Yeah, damn, we

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killed him. Okay, Well, this is a fucking mess. I mean,

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there's no consequences.

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Speaker 1: It's hell. But we need to get rid of all

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this stuff. It's bumming me out, it's making me more blue. Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Well, hey, look, cool hat. That's a cool hat. We

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should hold onto the hat. We should keep the hat.

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Speaker 2: I don't know.

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Speaker 1: They just put on that hat rack over there.

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Speaker 2: I don't know.

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Speaker 1: Well, okay, happy birthday.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, Oh you're alive.

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Speaker 1: Wait, how who are you? Guys?

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Speaker 3: It's Clayton and Chris. We're the ones who kills you. Yeah,

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are you what happened to my body. I'm frosted a snowman.

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I'm made out of snow. And now I'm at.

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Speaker 2: Your hat rack. I'm a hot rack.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, you still have limbs, Like there was a coat

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on there, so now you're kind of moving the coat around.

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Speaker 5: This is ridiculous.

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Speaker 4: I'm a guy made out of snow and a scarf

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and yeah coal for eyes.

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Speaker 2: You want your scarf, We can put the scarf on

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the hat rack. Yeah, that help there you go.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, It's like I'm like, oh, Zepik the Snowman.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, sorry about that man.

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Speaker 4: People are gonna think I have like a skeleton and

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the s of a snowman is a stick.

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Speaker 5: There's no stick inside of a snowman.

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Speaker 2: Have you thought about rebranding as like Frosty the Scarecrow.

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Speaker 3: Oh, that's something you could switch to Novembers. I mean,

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December is already pretty full of Why would.

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Speaker 5: I call myself Frosty? I should just be like Sticky

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the Tall Pole.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, you got something there. Kids will love that Sticky

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the tall Pole. Oh, here comes Sticky. We love Sticky.

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Speaker 1: You know what sticky is? Maybe not so great?

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Speaker 2: Sticky.

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Speaker 3: You might be popular with dogs. Dogs would love sticky. Uh,

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what's your preferred.

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Speaker 1: Form other than snow?

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Speaker 3: You just need to just kind of be like a

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mass of like wet or something.

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Speaker 1: I don't know, I've only really this is like.

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Speaker 5: Form number two. Wow, I've been snow.

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Speaker 1: Uh huh.

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Speaker 5: Now I'm a hat rack.

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Speaker 4: I guess one time my got put on top of

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a sandwich and I was like a sandwich for a while.

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They took the hat right off and they just ate

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the sandwich. So that was like not a big deal.

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Speaker 3: What did they call you when you were a sandwich?

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They call you Sandy or like or Jarrett.

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Speaker 5: Or I'm glad they didn't.

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Speaker 1: Call me Cherrett.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, that's a little much.

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Speaker 2: Frosty the Snowman was always love kids, and so so

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is Jared.

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Speaker 1: You know parallels.

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Speaker 4: What's funny is when I was a human. Yeah, I

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have a brother named Jared. It's not that one. Oh,

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it just happens to be his name.

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Speaker 2: Wait, wait, wit, So you were a human?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I was a guy.

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Speaker 4: My real name's Frank. Look, I'm gonna be honest, I

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know one hundred percent. Remember how I died. I think

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it was some kind of like hobo frozen on a train.

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Accident kind of a thing. But I had a top hat.

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This is back in like the eighteen nineties when people

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wore top hats.

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Speaker 1: Just oh okay.

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Speaker 4: And I died, and I think somehow some magical spirit

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imbued my soul and memories into this hat. And then

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when the hat gets put on stuff, it comes to light.

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So I've been a sandwich. Now I'm a hat rack.

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Speaker 3: It's kind of interesting because I've never seen a top

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hat worn like un ironically, rather than by like a

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steampunk cosplay douchebag.

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Speaker 4: You know.

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Speaker 2: There's the Monopoly Guy and then mister Peanut.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, little known fact. We have a club.

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Speaker 4: We have our own little handshake me, mister Peanut, the

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Monopoly Guy. Oh, we don't really claim any of the

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steampunk people.

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Speaker 2: Okay, oh yeah, I'm surprised the Monopoly guy anything.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, he's actually a pretty good guy.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, surprisingly decent guy.

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Speaker 5: You remember FDR.

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Speaker 4: He was like, hey, he's super rich, but willing to

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work with the common man. That's the monopoly man. Okay,

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you know that's his makeup, that's his DNA. Actually, mister

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Peanut kind of a jerk. Oh huh, it would surprise you.

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Speaker 1: Wow, mister peanut.

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Speaker 2: Huh.

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Speaker 3: I mean he's known to have killed several children, mostly

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just through allergies.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but I mean still, you know the death is

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a death.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, no, malice a forethought, as they say, but yeah,

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negligent homicideicide, manslaughter, nutslaughter.

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Speaker 1: Second degree. Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Well, if you're not happy as a stick, let's explore

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the space.

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Speaker 1: Where are we exactly? It's hot as balls here.

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Speaker 2: It's hell. Yeah, Oh, you're in hell. Not because of

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anything you did, at least as far as we know, right, okay,

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did he do anything?

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Speaker 4: The last thing I know is I was skating at

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00:08:50,120 --> 00:08:52,559
the pond with some kids. You were celebrating the advent

247
00:08:52,600 --> 00:08:53,639
of the Christmas season.

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Speaker 2: Oh, we wanted you to make an ice drink.

249
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Speaker 3: Yeah, we thought you had magic ice powers because you

250
00:08:58,360 --> 00:08:59,159
were a snow guy.

251
00:08:59,440 --> 00:09:02,039
Speaker 4: Oh no, maybe if you took the hat off of

252
00:09:02,080 --> 00:09:04,320
me and put my hat over like a pond, you

253
00:09:04,320 --> 00:09:04,799
have a lake.

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Speaker 5: But that's the problem is even and then it would melt.

255
00:09:07,840 --> 00:09:10,080
Speaker 2: It would melt, So you just kind of take on

256
00:09:10,159 --> 00:09:11,759
the form. Do you have stick powers?

257
00:09:11,879 --> 00:09:15,000
Speaker 4: I've got the powers of Frank, my previous person, which

258
00:09:15,039 --> 00:09:17,120
was just I was a nice guy. Oh and then

259
00:09:17,159 --> 00:09:19,840
the hat comes on, and I come to light. Every

260
00:09:19,919 --> 00:09:23,320
day is like a brand new beginning. I don't really remember.

261
00:09:22,960 --> 00:09:23,759
Speaker 2: How I got there.

262
00:09:24,240 --> 00:09:27,759
Speaker 4: Oh, I'll say Merry Christmas, and then inevitably something goes

263
00:09:27,799 --> 00:09:29,039
wrong and the hat gets.

264
00:09:28,840 --> 00:09:29,559
Speaker 1: Off or I melt.

265
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Speaker 3: Yeah, so you're saying that anything I put this hat

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00:09:33,039 --> 00:09:34,960
on you will become that thing.

267
00:09:35,080 --> 00:09:35,480
Speaker 2: That's right.

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Speaker 4: So it's not so much that I have ice and

269
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snow powers and I can make you an ice rink.

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It's that the hat will turn me into whatever you

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00:09:41,960 --> 00:09:42,759
put me on top of it.

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Speaker 3: Hey, Frosty Frank, can you give me one second. I'm

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00:09:44,799 --> 00:09:46,360
gonna pull this hat ouf the hat rack. I'm just

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gonna let you go to sleep.

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Speaker 2: I have a fall asleep. Wow, he actually said fall asleep.

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00:09:52,600 --> 00:09:53,759
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's weird that he did that.

277
00:09:53,799 --> 00:09:55,679
Speaker 3: All Right, before we get into some hijinks with this

278
00:09:55,720 --> 00:09:57,600
stupid hat, let's take a word from our sponsor.

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00:09:57,799 --> 00:09:59,679
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like to buy a lot of little trinkets from my friends.

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your first year at Monarch dot com with code gm FH. Okay, So, chrisy,

345
00:12:37,840 --> 00:12:39,120
we can have a lot of fun with this. I mean,

346
00:12:39,159 --> 00:12:41,000
we got this hat that we could make anything come

347
00:12:41,039 --> 00:12:43,399
to life. I know you've got like multiple sex dolls.

348
00:12:43,480 --> 00:12:45,600
Speaker 2: So if there's something there, Yeah, that might be kind

349
00:12:45,600 --> 00:12:47,679
of weird for Frosty, it'd.

350
00:12:47,559 --> 00:12:48,440
Speaker 1: Be pretty funny for me.

351
00:12:49,080 --> 00:12:51,440
Speaker 2: You know, I'm just saying, what about this flashlight?

352
00:12:51,759 --> 00:12:53,320
Speaker 3: I mean, I have to test it now that you

353
00:12:53,399 --> 00:12:54,960
put it in my brain, you know, I gotta know.

354
00:12:55,200 --> 00:12:56,679
I don't know why you brought that thing to work,

355
00:12:56,720 --> 00:12:58,480
but we gotta give it a go. All right, here

356
00:12:58,519 --> 00:12:59,200
we go and.

357
00:13:00,559 --> 00:13:01,240
Speaker 2: Over the water.

358
00:13:02,320 --> 00:13:05,320
Speaker 1: My god, Oh, I was a it's good.

359
00:13:05,679 --> 00:13:06,600
Speaker 2: What the heck am?

360
00:13:06,639 --> 00:13:09,120
Speaker 1: I don't worry about it.

361
00:13:09,200 --> 00:13:10,440
Speaker 2: I'm like a metal tube.

362
00:13:10,480 --> 00:13:12,440
Speaker 5: I'm like a flashlight with.

363
00:13:12,440 --> 00:13:13,279
Speaker 2: What is this you have?

364
00:13:13,399 --> 00:13:13,799
Speaker 1: Lips?

365
00:13:14,080 --> 00:13:16,480
Speaker 5: Oh boy, I've read about these.

366
00:13:16,679 --> 00:13:16,960
Speaker 1: Yeah.

367
00:13:17,120 --> 00:13:19,799
Speaker 5: Are you guys gotta like do unconfortable?

368
00:13:20,519 --> 00:13:23,679
Speaker 3: Oh no, no, we're just gonna call you fleshy and

369
00:13:23,720 --> 00:13:24,879
then just kind of laugh.

370
00:13:24,720 --> 00:13:28,120
Speaker 2: At you for me the last light. I'm gonna try

371
00:13:28,159 --> 00:13:30,159
to roll around and not this hat off of me.

372
00:13:30,320 --> 00:13:33,200
Speaker 5: I'm I can only go back.

373
00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:34,039
Speaker 2: And forth so much.

374
00:13:34,120 --> 00:13:35,960
Speaker 3: Well, I mean, you have another function if you just

375
00:13:36,039 --> 00:13:37,440
press that button down right there.

376
00:13:37,600 --> 00:13:39,799
Speaker 1: I always like shake around a little bit.

377
00:13:39,879 --> 00:13:42,240
Speaker 5: Okay, oh god, oh.

378
00:13:42,159 --> 00:13:45,960
Speaker 3: No, okay, all right, I'm taking the hat off. I mean, Chris,

379
00:13:46,000 --> 00:13:47,759
this is great. Yeah, I could do this all day.

380
00:13:47,799 --> 00:13:49,039
What else have we got around.

381
00:13:48,759 --> 00:13:50,919
Speaker 2: Here, Clay, Maybe we need to give him something that's

382
00:13:50,960 --> 00:13:53,879
closer to what he's used to, you know, like a

383
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:56,159
snow form. Three balls.

384
00:13:56,399 --> 00:13:59,159
Speaker 3: We've got a sebestos that's kind of the same consistency,

385
00:13:59,600 --> 00:14:00,919
ceiling insulation, a.

386
00:14:00,960 --> 00:14:04,679
Speaker 1: Pile of ash. He could be ashy ash man shit.

387
00:14:05,080 --> 00:14:05,879
Oh what about shit?

388
00:14:06,080 --> 00:14:08,080
Speaker 3: Oh yeah no, it's right there the whole time. I mean,

389
00:14:08,360 --> 00:14:10,720
you have a pile of it stored up over there. Yeah, yeah,

390
00:14:10,759 --> 00:14:13,440
for lunch. Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, it's a pretty big mound.

391
00:14:13,519 --> 00:14:16,080
He might actually come back even bigger than a man.

392
00:14:16,120 --> 00:14:19,159
Speaker 2: This is kind of fun. This is like very festive. Yeah, hey,

393
00:14:19,279 --> 00:14:20,960
let's go build a poop man.

394
00:14:21,279 --> 00:14:22,200
Speaker 1: Hey, I love it.

395
00:14:22,320 --> 00:14:25,639
Speaker 3: Yeah, do you want to build a poop man? All right,

396
00:14:25,720 --> 00:14:27,840
so I guess we got to form the ball. Okay,

397
00:14:27,879 --> 00:14:29,879
here's that's good. That's got a good shape to it.

398
00:14:30,080 --> 00:14:30,360
Speaker 2: Yeah.

399
00:14:30,440 --> 00:14:32,480
Speaker 1: We need to give him like some decorative things though.

400
00:14:32,559 --> 00:14:35,159
Speaker 2: This is great. A lot of fiber. This is really malleable.

401
00:14:35,200 --> 00:14:36,679
Speaker 1: It's undigested peanuts.

402
00:14:36,720 --> 00:14:38,360
Speaker 2: Oh what about corn for the buttons?

403
00:14:38,440 --> 00:14:38,759
Speaker 1: Corn?

404
00:14:38,840 --> 00:14:39,320
Speaker 2: That's good.

405
00:14:39,399 --> 00:14:40,639
Speaker 1: We can put the corn in there.

406
00:14:40,679 --> 00:14:43,480
Speaker 2: It is Hey, look, hey, look a poop angel.

407
00:14:44,879 --> 00:14:45,679
Speaker 1: You're making a mess.

408
00:14:45,720 --> 00:14:46,000
Speaker 2: Over there.

409
00:14:46,039 --> 00:14:47,279
Speaker 1: What should we give him for his eyes?

410
00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:50,639
Speaker 2: He just needs like some sort of round balls, perfect, Chris,

411
00:14:50,679 --> 00:14:51,240
your balls?

412
00:14:51,279 --> 00:14:54,000
Speaker 3: No, come here, come here, there we go, all right,

413
00:14:54,120 --> 00:14:56,600
one right there, one right there? A little bit smaller

414
00:14:56,639 --> 00:14:59,080
eyes than usual, but that's okay. For his nose, I

415
00:14:59,080 --> 00:15:00,679
guess you could put the fla slide back on.

416
00:15:01,080 --> 00:15:02,320
Speaker 2: It's something he's familiar with.

417
00:15:02,440 --> 00:15:04,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, hopefully that won't become his mouth though, because then

418
00:15:04,440 --> 00:15:05,840
he's just looking like he's fuckered.

419
00:15:05,759 --> 00:15:07,399
Speaker 2: Weird, like little like alien mouth.

420
00:15:07,480 --> 00:15:08,360
Speaker 1: Does he need arms?

421
00:15:08,399 --> 00:15:10,519
Speaker 3: I'm afraid if we give him arms, he's gonna attack

422
00:15:10,600 --> 00:15:12,200
us because we were really mean to him. You know.

423
00:15:12,320 --> 00:15:14,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, let's do no arms. That way, we have a

424
00:15:14,120 --> 00:15:15,519
little control over the situation.

425
00:15:15,679 --> 00:15:16,200
Speaker 1: No arms.

426
00:15:16,360 --> 00:15:19,639
Speaker 2: Yeah, all right, let's let the magic of Christmas begin.

427
00:15:21,240 --> 00:15:24,200
Speaker 1: Merry Christmas. Hey everybody.

428
00:15:24,720 --> 00:15:26,559
Speaker 2: Hey, hey, I.

429
00:15:26,639 --> 00:15:29,240
Speaker 5: Feel back almost of my normal self.

430
00:15:29,360 --> 00:15:30,879
Speaker 2: Yeah. Hey, wait a.

431
00:15:30,960 --> 00:15:32,679
Speaker 5: Minute, why am I all dirty?

432
00:15:33,320 --> 00:15:34,519
Speaker 2: Just some dirty snow?

433
00:15:34,720 --> 00:15:37,080
Speaker 4: Wait a minute, I think this is human feces or

434
00:15:37,360 --> 00:15:39,720
mixture of feces from humans and other things too.

435
00:15:39,840 --> 00:15:41,559
Speaker 2: What maybe a poop man?

436
00:15:41,679 --> 00:15:44,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, well, we could call you like frothy. You know,

437
00:15:44,279 --> 00:15:46,240
I don't know that storm.

438
00:15:46,320 --> 00:15:48,679
Speaker 4: I would beat you senseless, but he didn't even give

439
00:15:48,679 --> 00:15:49,559
me any arms.

440
00:15:49,720 --> 00:15:52,360
Speaker 3: Yeah, that was by design, frothy. We just didn't want

441
00:15:52,399 --> 00:15:53,360
to let you attack us.

442
00:15:53,440 --> 00:15:56,080
Speaker 4: Wait a minute, what is my nose? This is an insult.

443
00:15:56,159 --> 00:15:58,399
You put the flesh like back in my nose? What

444
00:15:58,440 --> 00:16:01,120
does it smell like? I don't want to say. Would

445
00:16:01,159 --> 00:16:03,320
you imply a certain level of familiarity?

446
00:16:03,480 --> 00:16:06,000
Speaker 2: But think how good of those jobs you could get?

447
00:16:06,120 --> 00:16:09,600
Speaker 4: No, this is you guys are horrible. No wonder you're

448
00:16:09,600 --> 00:16:10,000
in hell.

449
00:16:10,200 --> 00:16:12,279
Speaker 3: I'm sorry. We'll make this quick. If you just wait

450
00:16:12,320 --> 00:16:13,919
a minute. My edition is all weird?

451
00:16:14,159 --> 00:16:15,759
Speaker 1: Am I looking through your balls?

452
00:16:16,080 --> 00:16:19,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm gonna want the back. If that's okay, I'm.

453
00:16:19,639 --> 00:16:20,559
Speaker 1: Happy to give them back.

454
00:16:20,600 --> 00:16:21,679
Speaker 5: I don't want to look at the.

455
00:16:21,639 --> 00:16:22,799
Speaker 1: World through your balls.

456
00:16:22,960 --> 00:16:23,639
Speaker 2: What do you see?

457
00:16:23,919 --> 00:16:24,480
Speaker 1: Not much.

458
00:16:24,679 --> 00:16:27,120
Speaker 4: They're not very good at seeing things. It's just kind

459
00:16:27,120 --> 00:16:29,559
of like shapes and outlines of things.

460
00:16:29,679 --> 00:16:31,399
Speaker 1: It's got a lot of floaters, but it's like they're

461
00:16:31,399 --> 00:16:32,120
a little bit different.

462
00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:35,240
Speaker 3: Little squirmy with the tails, a little squirmy or squint

463
00:16:35,279 --> 00:16:35,720
really hard.

464
00:16:35,919 --> 00:16:37,159
Speaker 2: Huh Oh wow, you.

465
00:16:37,279 --> 00:16:42,440
Speaker 1: Just shut out? Come tears?

466
00:16:42,799 --> 00:16:45,399
Speaker 2: Oh, no crying semen.

467
00:16:45,320 --> 00:16:46,120
Speaker 5: This ad off.

468
00:16:46,159 --> 00:16:48,759
Speaker 4: This is an atrocity, This is a desecration.

469
00:16:49,120 --> 00:16:51,960
Speaker 2: We're just trying to make a holiday special episode.

470
00:16:52,200 --> 00:16:56,679
Speaker 3: Yeah, for whom freaks and rejects, this is horrifying. Speaking

471
00:16:56,720 --> 00:16:59,279
of freaks and rejects, we actually have some fans stuff

472
00:16:59,320 --> 00:17:00,759
in that we can talk about. You want to tell

473
00:17:00,799 --> 00:17:03,360
this for that, Frothy, Yeah, sure, I mean I got.

474
00:17:03,200 --> 00:17:05,519
Speaker 4: Nothing else better to do than sit here with my

475
00:17:05,680 --> 00:17:08,160
no arms seamen weeping out of my eyes.

476
00:17:08,359 --> 00:17:09,599
Speaker 1: That's the spirit. Okay.

477
00:17:09,640 --> 00:17:12,039
Speaker 3: So for our listeners at home here on good Morning

478
00:17:12,079 --> 00:17:15,640
from hell. For our Patreon subscribers, we like to roast them.

479
00:17:15,720 --> 00:17:17,759
So if you pay six dollars sixty six cents a

480
00:17:17,759 --> 00:17:19,799
monk you sign up for the Patreon, you exclusively to

481
00:17:19,839 --> 00:17:21,720
a bunch of cool stuff. You also the opportunity for

482
00:17:21,799 --> 00:17:25,400
us to roast you. So today we've got Michael. Michael

483
00:17:25,440 --> 00:17:27,920
says he's just a giant mass effect nerd trying to

484
00:17:27,920 --> 00:17:31,279
live his best life alongside his three dogs and two cats.

485
00:17:31,359 --> 00:17:32,480
Speaker 1: That's too many animals.

486
00:17:32,680 --> 00:17:36,880
Speaker 3: Massively nailed it, nailed it, got that mass effect joking Chris,

487
00:17:36,920 --> 00:17:38,880
that was great. Yeah, he says he's a barista and

488
00:17:38,920 --> 00:17:41,359
bookseller at Barnes and Nobles, and then he says, yes,

489
00:17:41,400 --> 00:17:42,119
we still exist.

490
00:17:42,319 --> 00:17:44,960
Speaker 1: Wow, Frothy, I feel like you would be familiar with, Michael.

491
00:17:44,960 --> 00:17:46,559
Speaker 3: I mean, every time I go into a Barnes and Noble,

492
00:17:46,599 --> 00:17:48,599
I need the shit, and then this guy's making coffee.

493
00:17:48,640 --> 00:17:49,759
Speaker 5: It's a regular pipeline.

494
00:17:49,880 --> 00:17:50,680
Speaker 1: Look, here's the thing.

495
00:17:50,839 --> 00:17:53,039
Speaker 5: Yes, you still exist, but nobody comes in there.

496
00:17:53,119 --> 00:17:54,680
Speaker 1: So how you know you exist?

497
00:17:54,839 --> 00:17:55,039
Speaker 2: Right?

498
00:17:55,480 --> 00:17:58,440
Speaker 4: Schrodinger's bookstore, Schrodinger's employment.

499
00:17:58,559 --> 00:18:00,160
Speaker 5: You have a job, but no one knows that you

500
00:18:00,200 --> 00:18:01,599
have a job, or maybe you don't.

501
00:18:01,720 --> 00:18:05,359
Speaker 3: Michael also included a fun embarrassing story. Michael says, in

502
00:18:05,400 --> 00:18:07,920
sixth grade, while my class was quietly taking a test,

503
00:18:07,960 --> 00:18:10,319
I farted so loudly that it startled the girl sitting

504
00:18:10,319 --> 00:18:12,359
in front of me. That prompted her in the most

505
00:18:12,359 --> 00:18:15,240
of the class to pause and scare me. I feel like,

506
00:18:15,319 --> 00:18:19,000
normally a fart would lead to laughter and chuckles, but

507
00:18:19,119 --> 00:18:20,680
for them to have turned around and stared you, it.

508
00:18:20,680 --> 00:18:24,160
Speaker 2: Must have smelled like, well, like you, frosty. Yeah, hey,

509
00:18:24,480 --> 00:18:26,480
if you play it off right, you can make an

510
00:18:26,519 --> 00:18:29,960
embarrassing fart a hilarious punchline. You just got to own it.

511
00:18:30,079 --> 00:18:32,400
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's true. You gotta own it. You gotta sell it.

512
00:18:32,400 --> 00:18:33,519
It's all about selling it.

513
00:18:33,519 --> 00:18:35,599
Speaker 3: It must have been a peculiar sounding fart for it

514
00:18:35,680 --> 00:18:38,640
to not have elicited laughter. People might have been afraid

515
00:18:39,000 --> 00:18:41,480
that was from Michael. So okay, I'm moving on. We've

516
00:18:41,519 --> 00:18:42,960
got another person running in.

517
00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:44,279
Speaker 1: This is Andrews.

518
00:18:44,559 --> 00:18:45,240
Speaker 2: Andrews.

519
00:18:45,480 --> 00:18:47,480
Speaker 3: Yes, he says, my name is pronounced Andrew but with

520
00:18:47,559 --> 00:18:50,039
an s. I'm sure you got that, but you wouldn't

521
00:18:50,039 --> 00:18:52,559
believe how much it trips people up. I'm socially awkward

522
00:18:52,559 --> 00:18:53,559
and my posture sucks.

523
00:18:53,640 --> 00:18:57,400
Speaker 2: No, I absolutely would believe at Tripsy, Are you Andrews?

524
00:18:57,519 --> 00:18:58,640
I mean you are there?

525
00:18:58,799 --> 00:19:02,839
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's like a collect Andrews does not like this.

526
00:19:03,200 --> 00:19:05,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean when he has something, when it's the

527
00:19:05,279 --> 00:19:07,880
possessive of Andrews, is it Andrews?

528
00:19:07,240 --> 00:19:12,359
Speaker 2: And what happens if Andrews is with another Andrew and.

529
00:19:12,319 --> 00:19:13,279
Speaker 1: Juice and dry?

530
00:19:13,519 --> 00:19:17,920
Speaker 3: Or is it and jesuses Andrews juices Andrew and Jrews juices?

531
00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:18,599
Speaker 1: Yeah?

532
00:19:18,680 --> 00:19:21,400
Speaker 3: I want to hear back for what Andrews does for

533
00:19:21,440 --> 00:19:24,200
a living. He says, I played bass in a blues band.

534
00:19:24,319 --> 00:19:26,640
Speaker 1: See you soon. I guess does he think blues bands

535
00:19:26,640 --> 00:19:28,160
are going to hell? I don't know. And I dabble

536
00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:30,240
in photography and other art stuff.

537
00:19:30,279 --> 00:19:33,960
Speaker 3: Other than that, I work in an office that's fine, Andrews.

538
00:19:34,039 --> 00:19:36,720
Speaker 1: In case the Monday Andrews, Andrews.

539
00:19:36,240 --> 00:19:38,720
Speaker 2: I'm sorry that the most interesting part about you is

540
00:19:38,720 --> 00:19:39,200
your name.

541
00:19:40,160 --> 00:19:42,359
Speaker 1: A blues band's pretty cool. I mean, I'm sure they're

542
00:19:42,400 --> 00:19:43,119
not good.

543
00:19:43,240 --> 00:19:46,400
Speaker 2: What's a good name for Andrews Blues Band, Andrew's Blues,

544
00:19:46,480 --> 00:19:50,839
Andrews Blueses, Blues by Andrews Andrews Blues Bands is.

545
00:19:50,960 --> 00:19:52,960
Speaker 3: Oh, actually I'm reading ahead, and this is actually gonna

546
00:19:52,960 --> 00:19:54,759
make us regret this a little bit. Growing up, I

547
00:19:54,799 --> 00:19:57,559
got teased a lot for my name of shit whoop,

548
00:19:57,680 --> 00:20:01,119
with people asking me why it's plural like we just did,

549
00:20:01,240 --> 00:20:03,559
and if there were more of me somewhere else. Oh

550
00:20:03,559 --> 00:20:07,359
my god, I promise we didn't read this at a time. Honestly,

551
00:20:07,359 --> 00:20:08,960
it was fine and kind of funny, but I'm just

552
00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:17,519
glad no one figured out that Andrews backwards is sewer DNA.

553
00:20:16,799 --> 00:20:20,279
Speaker 2: Man, Andrews. You're roasting yourself here, Andrews.

554
00:20:20,359 --> 00:20:21,640
Speaker 1: Why would he need to call in?

555
00:20:22,319 --> 00:20:23,279
Speaker 5: He's got it down.

556
00:20:23,759 --> 00:20:26,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, Andrews, you're doing our job for us. And for

557
00:20:27,039 --> 00:20:30,640
Andrews's goofy story, that was embarrassing. I'm gonna TLDR this

558
00:20:30,799 --> 00:20:33,079
basically a bunch of boxes fell over, and all he can.

559
00:20:33,039 --> 00:20:35,000
Speaker 1: Manage to say was no, no, no, no.

560
00:20:34,799 --> 00:20:36,640
Speaker 3: I think I honestly, I would stick to the fact

561
00:20:36,640 --> 00:20:38,720
that sewer Dna is your name backwards.

562
00:20:38,960 --> 00:20:41,519
Speaker 2: Yeah, sewer DNA is way better than the time that

563
00:20:41,640 --> 00:20:44,799
some boxes fell over. Yeah that trump's that so well. Hey,

564
00:20:44,880 --> 00:20:47,920
thank you Andrews, all three of you, and Michael and

565
00:20:48,039 --> 00:20:49,960
Michael's thank you for having a good arts and craft

566
00:20:50,039 --> 00:20:51,880
stores and for buying Joey Andne fabrics.

567
00:20:52,079 --> 00:20:55,880
Speaker 4: So frosty, it's frothy now, frothy, yeah, frothy.

568
00:20:56,079 --> 00:20:58,759
Speaker 3: The poo man tell us about this magic that makes

569
00:20:58,799 --> 00:20:59,799
you live for forever?

570
00:20:59,880 --> 00:21:02,240
Speaker 1: Is this a curse? Is it a gifts to your ghost?

571
00:21:02,319 --> 00:21:05,359
Speaker 4: Right, it's sort of a ghost because, like I said,

572
00:21:05,559 --> 00:21:08,240
I died. I don't really exactly remember, and I think

573
00:21:08,279 --> 00:21:11,079
somehow my spirit got imbued in the hat. Maybe the

574
00:21:11,119 --> 00:21:14,480
hat was already haunted. Oh, and I picked up a

575
00:21:14,519 --> 00:21:16,440
haunted hat. And then it was like, I think it

576
00:21:16,559 --> 00:21:18,480
sucks up a little bit of everything that's.

577
00:21:18,319 --> 00:21:19,359
Speaker 5: Come into contact with.

578
00:21:19,480 --> 00:21:22,720
Speaker 4: But I was like an outsized personality apparently, so that

579
00:21:22,920 --> 00:21:25,559
allows me to keep coming back. Is it animate objects

580
00:21:25,640 --> 00:21:27,279
like this giant mount of poo here?

581
00:21:27,440 --> 00:21:27,720
Speaker 2: Yeah?

582
00:21:27,759 --> 00:21:29,440
Speaker 3: So where'd you buy the hat. Can you remember where

583
00:21:29,480 --> 00:21:31,359
the hat came from Macy's.

584
00:21:31,559 --> 00:21:35,240
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, maybe it was haunted, like in its manufacturing process.

585
00:21:35,319 --> 00:21:37,400
Speaker 2: Oh oh, maybe like a child died.

586
00:21:37,599 --> 00:21:40,480
Speaker 4: It was probably like a child laborer burned to death

587
00:21:40,519 --> 00:21:43,480
horribly as they put the finishing touches on the hat

588
00:21:43,559 --> 00:21:45,039
and then imbued it with a curse.

589
00:21:45,319 --> 00:21:46,720
Speaker 5: Maybe they were saving up money.

590
00:21:46,720 --> 00:21:48,640
Speaker 4: It was like, oh Henry story, they were saving up

591
00:21:48,640 --> 00:21:50,680
money to buy their mother, I don't.

592
00:21:50,440 --> 00:21:51,240
Speaker 5: Know, like a coffin.

593
00:21:51,319 --> 00:21:52,359
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, for.

594
00:21:52,359 --> 00:21:54,000
Speaker 5: Their death at Christmas time, I don't know.

595
00:21:54,039 --> 00:21:56,519
Speaker 4: And then of course they died instead, and then the

596
00:21:56,599 --> 00:21:57,480
hat went to the mom.

597
00:21:57,559 --> 00:21:59,119
Speaker 5: The mom died something like that.

598
00:21:59,240 --> 00:22:02,400
Speaker 3: So it's like a cinema universe of sad Christmas songs.

599
00:22:02,519 --> 00:22:05,400
Speaker 4: Yeah, just horrible Christmas things happening over and over again.

600
00:22:05,640 --> 00:22:08,680
Speaker 2: That's a really tragic backstory for Frosty. But now you

601
00:22:08,720 --> 00:22:12,400
have this great new origin story. Yeah, you're rebranding now,

602
00:22:12,519 --> 00:22:13,519
yeah a little bit.

603
00:22:13,599 --> 00:22:15,319
Speaker 4: Look, here's the thing. You can send me back up

604
00:22:15,359 --> 00:22:17,000
to the surface world. But I don't know if I

605
00:22:17,000 --> 00:22:19,079
want to go like this. It's pretty disgusting.

606
00:22:19,200 --> 00:22:21,039
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think the kids are gonna run away. They're

607
00:22:21,039 --> 00:22:21,960
gonna be really scared.

608
00:22:22,000 --> 00:22:24,240
Speaker 3: I mean I would be terrified of a snowman, but

609
00:22:24,319 --> 00:22:26,160
now I'm living giant pile of shit.

610
00:22:26,240 --> 00:22:26,839
Speaker 1: That's crazy.

611
00:22:27,079 --> 00:22:29,279
Speaker 2: Yeah, what if you just made new friends. It's a

612
00:22:29,279 --> 00:22:31,079
different industry, but some people are in a scat.

613
00:22:31,240 --> 00:22:32,119
Speaker 5: Look here's the thing.

614
00:22:32,240 --> 00:22:33,839
Speaker 4: I don't know if I would want to be friends

615
00:22:33,839 --> 00:22:35,440
with the people who'd want to be friends with me

616
00:22:35,559 --> 00:22:36,519
in this current state.

617
00:22:36,680 --> 00:22:37,279
Speaker 1: It makes sense.

618
00:22:37,400 --> 00:22:41,079
Speaker 4: Innocent children, that's fun, Christmas love it. But this is

619
00:22:41,240 --> 00:22:43,599
a little this is a little horrifying. Yeah, so I

620
00:22:43,680 --> 00:22:45,119
just want to go back to the way things were.

621
00:22:45,279 --> 00:22:46,960
Send me back to a pile of snoes. Put me

622
00:22:47,000 --> 00:22:48,599
back on we don't what are you guys doing. We

623
00:22:48,640 --> 00:22:49,039
don't know.

624
00:22:49,240 --> 00:22:52,359
Speaker 2: Croft Like, give me we don't have snow in hell.

625
00:22:52,799 --> 00:22:56,759
Speaker 3: Oh gosh. Also take me back to the circle getting

626
00:22:56,759 --> 00:22:57,480
all over me.

627
00:22:57,720 --> 00:22:59,279
Speaker 1: God, Chris, get them away, get.

628
00:22:59,160 --> 00:23:03,400
Speaker 4: Your back, stops stop, stops me.

629
00:23:03,599 --> 00:23:05,799
Speaker 1: I don't want my hands on you. You're disgusting.

630
00:23:06,000 --> 00:23:08,319
Speaker 3: Just go sit down, just like five more minutes of

631
00:23:08,359 --> 00:23:08,880
this interview.

632
00:23:08,960 --> 00:23:13,160
Speaker 2: Just Jesus Christ.

633
00:23:13,400 --> 00:23:14,720
Speaker 1: This guy's out of control.

634
00:23:14,880 --> 00:23:17,759
Speaker 2: Man, He's just throwing ship everywhere, and not in a

635
00:23:17,799 --> 00:23:18,240
fun way.

636
00:23:18,319 --> 00:23:21,319
Speaker 3: Yeah, our office is a fucking mess. Now it smells terrible.

637
00:23:21,359 --> 00:23:24,720
And then there's like these tracks of dung everywhere. Oh god,

638
00:23:25,000 --> 00:23:26,960
I don't even really want to grant him his last

639
00:23:26,960 --> 00:23:29,039
wish of sending him back up to Earth. That's how

640
00:23:29,119 --> 00:23:31,160
much that guy sucked. Great, Chris, Oh yeah, what do

641
00:23:31,200 --> 00:23:32,680
we do with that fucking do you want to destroy

642
00:23:32,720 --> 00:23:35,119
it or something? Cast it back into the fires of

643
00:23:35,240 --> 00:23:38,799
Mount Doom? Okay, stop, I asked earlier. No Tolkien, bullshit,

644
00:23:39,000 --> 00:23:40,839
here you go again. But uh you're not wrong though.

645
00:23:40,880 --> 00:23:43,000
I mean, there's a lava lake out there. Just fucking

646
00:23:43,039 --> 00:23:43,680
throw it in the lava.

647
00:23:43,720 --> 00:23:44,880
Speaker 2: Let it burn up. Who cares? Right?

648
00:23:48,720 --> 00:23:53,000
Speaker 3: So that's been another episode of Good Morning mel Christmas.

649
00:23:53,000 --> 00:23:56,799
Speaker 1: Oh my god, Oh my god, an animated lava lake.

650
00:23:56,880 --> 00:24:01,680
Speaker 5: Now, yeah, it's not the Wondering God.

651
00:24:01,839 --> 00:24:03,119
Speaker 1: It's not a terminator.

652
00:24:03,240 --> 00:24:06,079
Speaker 4: You can't make the film.

653
00:24:11,440 --> 00:24:18,039
Speaker 1: Office. Oh my god, brid Verry, Chris is everybody. We'll

654
00:24:18,079 --> 00:24:18,440
see you.

655
00:24:18,440 --> 00:24:23,079
Speaker 3: Next year, Chris very Crests.

656
00:24:26,640 --> 00:24:31,920
Speaker 2: Thank you so much. Shannon McCormick, the amazing actor, voice, actor, entertainer,

657
00:24:32,160 --> 00:24:33,599
so many things for coming on.

658
00:24:33,720 --> 00:24:35,839
Speaker 5: Hey, thank you guys. I really appreciate it. Shannon.

659
00:24:35,920 --> 00:24:38,440
Speaker 3: We've been working with you for a decade now, at

660
00:24:38,519 --> 00:24:42,200
least fifteen years A long time, Yeah, fifteen years.

661
00:24:42,279 --> 00:24:45,759
Speaker 4: Or whatever it is whatever Chris started at Brewster Teeth. Yeah,

662
00:24:45,799 --> 00:24:46,839
I was already there working.

663
00:24:46,960 --> 00:24:49,599
Speaker 2: So where can people find more of you if they

664
00:24:49,640 --> 00:24:51,240
want to or tell people what you've been up to?

665
00:24:51,400 --> 00:24:53,680
Speaker 4: Mostly I do like live theater here in Austin, So

666
00:24:53,880 --> 00:24:55,960
I do stuff at the Hide Up Theater. I teach

667
00:24:56,079 --> 00:24:58,119
at Fallout, So if you want to look up either

668
00:24:58,119 --> 00:25:00,519
of those improv theaters here in Austin, you could find

669
00:25:00,680 --> 00:25:03,480
me doing stuff there. I have a blog that I

670
00:25:03,480 --> 00:25:06,000
can share with you that I rarely update, but every

671
00:25:06,000 --> 00:25:07,640
once in a while I'll do a little interview there

672
00:25:07,640 --> 00:25:10,960
and talk to interesting people in the comedy and nerd

673
00:25:11,039 --> 00:25:11,759
space world.

674
00:25:11,799 --> 00:25:13,799
Speaker 1: That's awesome. I didn't know that you were doing theater stuff.

675
00:25:13,799 --> 00:25:14,200
That's cool.

676
00:25:14,279 --> 00:25:17,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, for anyone if you're ever visiting Austin and Wannah,

677
00:25:17,400 --> 00:25:18,240
if you want to see.

678
00:25:18,079 --> 00:25:20,839
Speaker 3: Good comedy and not the new kind of comedy that's

679
00:25:20,880 --> 00:25:21,839
taking over right now.

680
00:25:22,119 --> 00:25:22,920
Speaker 5: Oh my god.

681
00:25:23,079 --> 00:25:25,480
Speaker 2: Right, Shannon, what are some of the things that people

682
00:25:25,599 --> 00:25:26,279
might know you from?

683
00:25:26,359 --> 00:25:28,039
Speaker 4: Most of the audience will probably know me from Red

684
00:25:28,119 --> 00:25:30,880
Versus Blue, where I play Adrian Washington, Ruby where i'm

685
00:25:31,000 --> 00:25:34,559
Professor Osbend, and Camp Camp where I'm the quartermaster. And

686
00:25:34,559 --> 00:25:37,759
then I've done various other live action and other voice

687
00:25:37,759 --> 00:25:39,960
things in day five. Day five, Yeah, I worked with

688
00:25:40,000 --> 00:25:43,039
you guys on day five, Doctorbert, Yeah, I almost forgot

689
00:25:43,119 --> 00:25:43,599
my characters.

690
00:25:43,799 --> 00:25:46,480
Speaker 2: Thank you so much for coming on, Shannon, and we're

691
00:25:46,480 --> 00:25:49,160
going to go talk about all of our sins and

692
00:25:49,160 --> 00:25:50,559
our push show while we're going to hell.

693
00:25:50,680 --> 00:25:51,559
Speaker 5: So sounds good.

694
00:25:51,640 --> 00:25:54,039
Speaker 2: Anyone listening, thank you for a good year. And you

695
00:25:54,160 --> 00:25:56,559
might have a chance to still get some holiday gifts

696
00:25:56,559 --> 00:25:58,559
that start up Gooding from hell dot com and get

697
00:25:58,599 --> 00:26:00,359
a shipped in time. If not, you can and go

698
00:26:00,440 --> 00:26:02,039
to a good Morning from Hell dot to comment. You

699
00:26:02,039 --> 00:26:04,960
can gift Patreon membership. So that's a really good last

700
00:26:05,000 --> 00:26:07,400
minute gift. If you're really bad and you're waiting till

701
00:26:07,440 --> 00:26:08,240
last minute.

702
00:26:07,960 --> 00:26:09,880
Speaker 1: We'll forgive you. Bye bye