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<v Speaker 1>Hey, everybody, aj Ben's are here with fame, is it? Bitch?

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<v Speaker 2>This is your daily Unfiltered podcast from March thirteenth, twenty

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<v Speaker 2>twenty five oh three, two oh two five. Nice day today.

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<v Speaker 2>You're gonna hit sixty degrees. Got to get the backyard

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<v Speaker 2>ready for Roseley to plant flowers in a month or so,

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<v Speaker 2>just in case it's not another freeze coming.

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<v Speaker 1>You never can tell in the Midwest, you know.

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<v Speaker 2>I mean when I got here a couple of weeks back,

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<v Speaker 2>it was three degrees and now it's up to sixty

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<v Speaker 2>sixty five.

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<v Speaker 1>It's very strange.

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<v Speaker 2>So uh, it's twelve good humming birds are coming around

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<v Speaker 2>as you show out. The other day, I posted a

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<v Speaker 2>picture of a red cardinal that we cardinals are red,

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<v Speaker 2>a cardinal that came to the bird feeder in the

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<v Speaker 2>window on the day of my father's death March seventh.

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<v Speaker 2>It was also right above a framed picture when when

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<v Speaker 2>nephew Jackie was young and just began to swim competitively

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<v Speaker 2>in school, and it that picture is inside the room,

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<v Speaker 2>and above that picture is the window where the bird

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<v Speaker 2>feeder is. And it's like I said to Rosalie, is

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<v Speaker 2>this Jackie or is this daddy, who knows, but it's

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<v Speaker 2>amazing to see this. And then another one came and

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<v Speaker 2>landed on a tree branch about fifteen feet past the window.

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<v Speaker 1>That's two. Now.

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<v Speaker 2>I never see two cardinals together. I don't know where

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<v Speaker 2>you live, but that's not an ordinary sight. So I

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<v Speaker 2>always feel good and shit like that happens. It's an

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<v Speaker 2>amazing thing, messages from the Great beyond, signals and signs

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<v Speaker 2>that some of us don't really get in tune with,

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<v Speaker 2>and others completely look for them and feel them as

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<v Speaker 2>they happen. Speaking of which, as I said the other day,

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<v Speaker 2>Rosalie and I stayed up late the other night just

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<v Speaker 2>talking watching the pasta Queen on Amazon. And you know,

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<v Speaker 2>I always pepper her with questions because look, man, I

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<v Speaker 2>mean not that she's ill, but you know when people go,

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<v Speaker 2>when people leave, they leave with all knowledge and information

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<v Speaker 2>about your family and your family tree, the legacy.

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<v Speaker 1>It's there's no one.

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<v Speaker 2>Else to go to to talk to, to find out

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<v Speaker 2>stuff about the people who were there before me, were

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<v Speaker 2>the people who were there when I was very young,

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<v Speaker 2>and she was seventeen years older than me. So Rosalie

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<v Speaker 2>knows all the secrets and all the stories and I

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<v Speaker 2>couldn't believe I heard this story. I never knew this,

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<v Speaker 2>and I was like, how would you not tell me this?

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<v Speaker 2>So apparently, well not apparently. My mother's mother had I

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<v Speaker 2>think six kids, Louis, Anna, Josie, Jenny, my mother.

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<v Speaker 1>That's five.

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<v Speaker 2>She had five kids, and then there was always Uncle

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<v Speaker 2>Frankie and Uncle Vinnie. And I know that there weren't

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<v Speaker 2>Grandma's kids. Grandma died before I was born. My mother

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<v Speaker 2>was pregnant when her mother died, so I never saw her.

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<v Speaker 2>But I do have her middle name, Joseph. She was

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<v Speaker 2>Joseph Fiene, but she went by pitt Panella pit Beennie

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<v Speaker 2>doing in Sicilian, and she took those two other boys

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<v Speaker 2>in because her sister died and she took those two

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<v Speaker 2>boys in. So now she's raising seventy kids. Uncle Frankie

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<v Speaker 2>i'd met many times. He was fine. I was a

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<v Speaker 2>young boy, but it was fun to be around. It

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<v Speaker 2>looked like looked like family. He was family. I didn't

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<v Speaker 2>know at that point he was not really my grandmother's son,

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<v Speaker 2>but in the years to come, I learned that. But

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<v Speaker 2>I never knew that the other brother, Uncle Vinnie, was

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<v Speaker 2>a flat out fag.

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<v Speaker 1>I could have. I'm like, how could you not tell

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<v Speaker 1>me that I had a big gay uncle or great uncle?

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<v Speaker 1>What have you? Oh, you didn't know? How could I know?

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<v Speaker 1>He died before I was even born? I believe. No,

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<v Speaker 1>he died like when I was very very young. I believe.

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<v Speaker 2>And I think I might have met him once, maybe

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<v Speaker 2>or twice. It's kind of foggy, but yeah, big gay uncle.

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<v Speaker 1>I did not know that. Not does anything wrong with

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<v Speaker 1>having a big gay uncle.

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<v Speaker 2>But back in those times, back in that era, he

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<v Speaker 2>must have led a very interesting life, a life full

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<v Speaker 2>of lies, because you had to back then before being

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<v Speaker 2>found out to be gay or having a male lover.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't even know.

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<v Speaker 2>Wow, it's so hard when you know when when when

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<v Speaker 2>you go back at your history. These are enough things

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<v Speaker 2>you're gonna hear from Henry Gates on that TV show

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<v Speaker 2>about your family tree. But there's so much mystery surrounding

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<v Speaker 2>my mother's mother and father. And I've brought this up

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<v Speaker 2>several times in the past about my uncle, my grandmother,

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<v Speaker 2>my grandfather, Nicholas, who died when I was two. There's

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<v Speaker 2>one picture of me sitting on his lap. I can't

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<v Speaker 2>find it. Never looked like any of us. He actually

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<v Speaker 2>looked like somebody that done what's that paint through paints

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<v Speaker 2>the American portraits family. You know that those famous paintings

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<v Speaker 2>are people, you know what I mean?

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<v Speaker 1>He looked like that, like very Middle America, kind of

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<v Speaker 1>looked nothing sicilian, a Bolidan. Nothing about him looked like us.

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<v Speaker 1>I always thought this is odd, but what'll I know?

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<v Speaker 1>And then you come to find out that Grandpa quote

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<v Speaker 1>unquote no married Grandma because it was an arranged marriage.

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<v Speaker 1>When Grandma got off the boat from Italy and saw him,

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<v Speaker 1>she immediately didn't want to marry him. But his brothers

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<v Speaker 1>were ma fiosa.

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<v Speaker 2>And they more or less said to her, or made

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<v Speaker 2>sure she knew if she didn't go forward with this

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<v Speaker 2>arranged marriage, they would send word back to her village

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<v Speaker 2>in Italy saying she's a big bhutana here in America,

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<v Speaker 2>a big tramp just to hurt her name and image

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<v Speaker 2>and whatever you want to call it, be disgraceful. So

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<v Speaker 2>she marries Grandpa Nick Nicholas Nicole, and they go on

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<v Speaker 2>to have all those children, but the last two were

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<v Speaker 2>taken in by Grandma because her sister died. However, my

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<v Speaker 2>mother and my uncle Nikki, the last two children, the

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<v Speaker 2>last two siblings. Dare I say this, But they had

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<v Speaker 2>a different look. They had a darker look and the

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<v Speaker 2>features were different than their other siblings. And me and

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<v Speaker 2>Rosalie and Lorraine and Grace, Mee and my cousin Joanne,

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<v Speaker 2>we kind of all look alike, but not the same,

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<v Speaker 2>not in the same way. Actually, Grace may looks a

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<v Speaker 2>lot like Roselie and myself. But it was just weird

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<v Speaker 2>that I always felt in my bones that is this

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<v Speaker 2>really our grandfather?

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<v Speaker 1>He doesn't look anything.

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<v Speaker 2>Then you come to find out the big story that

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<v Speaker 2>my mother and her sisters desperately didn't want us to

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<v Speaker 2>know that at some point in his life Grandpa Nick,

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<v Speaker 2>who was a bricklayer, fell off a building. I don't

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<v Speaker 2>know how how high it was, but he never recovered.

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<v Speaker 2>He always act like he was a young kid. He

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<v Speaker 2>just his whole personality changed from this head trauma. And

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<v Speaker 2>I heard from relatives and my sister he play hide

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<v Speaker 2>and seek with the little kids, and he wasn't.

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<v Speaker 1>A father or a man anymore.

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<v Speaker 2>And Grandma, if she's anything like me, you know, loves love,

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<v Speaker 2>loves passion, loves desires, has a fire in a heart, Well,

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<v Speaker 2>where would she go because her husband was no longer

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<v Speaker 2>being that kind of man.

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<v Speaker 1>Along comes a man named Monino.

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<v Speaker 2>I was always told half black hair fattalion, or part

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<v Speaker 2>black and half for that. Whatever it was, it was

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<v Speaker 2>a mixture, that's the way. That's the story I got.

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<v Speaker 2>Rose says, no, that's not true, but I heard it

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<v Speaker 2>from another relative. Either way, The story goes that since

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<v Speaker 2>Grandpa couldn't perform anymore, was just out of his head.

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<v Speaker 2>Grand Grandma took in Moneino, this this man as a

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<v Speaker 2>border you know, he pay rent. Grandma had a knack

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<v Speaker 2>for money. Both my grandmothers knew how to hustle and

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<v Speaker 2>make money more than the men did. So she brought

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<v Speaker 2>him in and he lived I guess in the basement,

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<v Speaker 2>whatever the hell, and he paid her portion of the rent.

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<v Speaker 1>But then proceeded to have two children with her.

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<v Speaker 2>As the story goes, my mother and uncle Nikki, and

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<v Speaker 2>at some point Grandpa Nick walk up out of his

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<v Speaker 2>whatever you want to call it, and said, something's wrong here,

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<v Speaker 2>something's wrong, you know, I he understood that he wasn't

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<v Speaker 2>having sex with his wife. I get this, two more kids,

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<v Speaker 2>she's pregnant again, and again, what's going on and apparently,

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<v Speaker 2>so the story goes, he had made a reference to

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<v Speaker 2>Monino that he'd had it and he's got to get

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<v Speaker 2>out of the house, and whatever manhood he had left,

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<v Speaker 2>he expressed that, and this man Monino left because it

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<v Speaker 2>was the respectful thing to do. There was also a

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<v Speaker 2>story about a television arrived in the house. He bought

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<v Speaker 2>allegedly bought a television for my grandmother so the kids

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<v Speaker 2>could see TV, et cetera. And that was the final

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<v Speaker 2>straw for Grandpa. In addition to the children, there's now

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<v Speaker 2>a television set where they didn't have one. He knew

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<v Speaker 2>he wasn't working to afford that, so it was always

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<v Speaker 2>strange and he just wouldn't have it. Years years, years later,

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<v Speaker 2>it stayed in that apartment in Brooklyn with one of

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<v Speaker 2>my aunts who had passed away, and I said, go

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<v Speaker 2>to the apartment, I talk to her daughter.

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<v Speaker 1>I want to get any kind of things that I.

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<v Speaker 2>Think was Jenny who died, maybe Josie, I forget, but

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<v Speaker 2>I want to get anything that would be something that

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<v Speaker 2>I have close to my heart that once belonged to that.

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<v Speaker 2>I went to Brooklyn to Benson Nursta and went in

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<v Speaker 2>that room. It was like she still was alive. Everything

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<v Speaker 2>in that apartment was just so old. I'm talking about

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<v Speaker 2>this in the late eighties, and it looked like I was.

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<v Speaker 1>In the fifties. It was a time capsule. I took

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<v Speaker 1>that TV.

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<v Speaker 2>I tied it to the top of my Mazda RX seven,

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<v Speaker 2>big black and white console TV with rope and straps,

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<v Speaker 2>and I went from Brooklyn back to Long Island, fifty miles.

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<v Speaker 2>I said, let me try and put it on and

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<v Speaker 2>see what happens. I plug it in the garage. Nothing,

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<v Speaker 2>so I start to mow the lawn. It's getting kind

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<v Speaker 2>of dark out and a sunset, and I'm not paying

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<v Speaker 2>attention to the TV. It's in the middle of my garage.

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<v Speaker 2>It's getting dark out, and I plug a TV and

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<v Speaker 2>then forget about it. And about ten minutes later, the

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<v Speaker 2>garage and the fucking TV is on and it's a

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<v Speaker 2>black and white movie, believe it or not, which made

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<v Speaker 2>it even more eerie, and I forget what channel was.

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<v Speaker 2>But I turned the volume up and the TV worked.

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<v Speaker 2>Don't get me startled the fact that I no longer

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<v Speaker 2>have that TV. It got all mixed up with storage

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<v Speaker 2>and who's moving where I'm going to the city. I'm

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<v Speaker 2>going to Los Angeles. I just couldn't keep lugging it around.

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<v Speaker 2>So what's gone.

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<v Speaker 1>But there's so much mystery in that story.

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<v Speaker 2>We don't even know for sure if that's our grandfather,

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<v Speaker 2>if Monino was our real grandfather. There's even stories that

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<v Speaker 2>I think are very true, that you know, my grandmother

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<v Speaker 2>made wine and pasta and she would feed the local mafios.

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<v Speaker 2>So that was both my grandmothers did that and they

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<v Speaker 2>loved her. And back in the day, there were tunnels

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<v Speaker 2>underneath Brooklyn. They might still be there today that led

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<v Speaker 2>from different neighborhoods of different neighbors, basically for bootleggers and

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<v Speaker 2>during the Prohibition era. And everybody associates al Capone with Chicago,

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<v Speaker 2>but al Capone was born in Brooklyn, and my relatives,

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<v Speaker 2>especially Grace Mary, has always said that grandma fed al.

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<v Speaker 1>Caponent when he was very young, before he moved on

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<v Speaker 1>to Chicago.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't know, guys. I know I'm spending ten minutes.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh it's eleven minutes and eleven seconds.

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<v Speaker 1>That's another sign either way. It was a very eventful

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<v Speaker 1>evening learning about family history.

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<v Speaker 2>Whether how much of it is true, I don't know,

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<v Speaker 2>but It certainly takes on a life of its own,

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<v Speaker 2>but let's get into the present day. Sorry for that

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<v Speaker 2>trip down memory lane, here's a good story. Finally, sick

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<v Speaker 2>of all the girls claiming men rape them. I'm fine

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<v Speaker 2>with people saying P Diddy raped them because he's a

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<v Speaker 2>sick though, but enough is enough. So many women are

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<v Speaker 2>saying men rape them and it turns out not to

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<v Speaker 2>be true, and we can go down the Harvey Weinstein

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<v Speaker 2>rabbit hole, but I don't want it today either way.

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<v Speaker 2>It's just been going on forever. And finally a guy

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<v Speaker 2>fought that. Jay Z has been fighting back this particular

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<v Speaker 2>claim that this woman has had that he raped her

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<v Speaker 2>cup of decades back actually twenty five years ago.

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<v Speaker 1>With Sean P.

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<v Speaker 2>Diddy COLLMBS after the Video Music Awards in New York

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<v Speaker 2>City back in twenty twenty.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, so that was a big story. Is jay Z

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<v Speaker 1>like Diddy? All these hip hop guys and rappers crazy?

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<v Speaker 1>First she went by Jane Doe, this girl, but.

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<v Speaker 2>It turns out, well, she's now identified, but it turns

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<v Speaker 2>out she now says that never happened. He was just there,

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<v Speaker 2>she said, but he didn't have anything to do with

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<v Speaker 2>any sexual acts toward me. An investigator asked her did

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<v Speaker 2>he have anything to do with any sexual acts towards you?

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<v Speaker 1>And she said yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>Now, jay Z, like I said, always denied this and

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<v Speaker 2>was ready to fight and is still fighting. But elsewhere

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<v Speaker 2>in that same recording by the private investigator, this girl's

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<v Speaker 2>call her Jane Doe is now saying her lawyer Tony Busby,

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<v Speaker 2>pressured her to follow this suit against jay Z. She

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<v Speaker 2>said he was the one that kind of pushed me

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<v Speaker 2>towards going forward with this and blaming jay Z, And

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<v Speaker 2>the investigator says, Buzzby did, she says, yeah.

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<v Speaker 1>Busby is the.

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<v Speaker 2>Guy that's representing a bunch of P Diddy accusers that

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<v Speaker 2>have filed charges against the rapper, And this one turns

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<v Speaker 2>out to be not true. And I'm glad, And you know,

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<v Speaker 2>people might say, you know, we got in the habit

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<v Speaker 2>of saying, hey, if these guys aren't gonna counter sue

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<v Speaker 2>these girls, that they're probably guilty.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, jay Z was very quick.

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<v Speaker 2>With counter suing and he's continuing to do so, the

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<v Speaker 2>lawyer and her, So I hope he does well in court.

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<v Speaker 1>God knows he has enough money.

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<v Speaker 2>But I don't see jay Z as a rapist the

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<v Speaker 2>way I look at P Diddy in some of the

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<v Speaker 2>assholes he hangs around with. To me, jay Z, he

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<v Speaker 2>has a little more class and didn't have to live

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<v Speaker 2>that kind of lifestyle.

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<v Speaker 1>Not that he's a real looker in the looks department.

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<v Speaker 2>But you know, he has a confidence and a swagger

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<v Speaker 2>about him that make him very New York and you know,

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<v Speaker 2>very powerful in his own image. But I'm glad, I'm

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<v Speaker 2>glad this happened. This girl finally coughed up and said, no,

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<v Speaker 2>this didn't happen. And you know, I gotta tell you

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<v Speaker 2>this forrest Gump of my.

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<v Speaker 1>Life.

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<v Speaker 2>I was at that those VMA's at Radio City Music

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<v Speaker 2>Hall in two thousand.

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<v Speaker 1>It was like it was one of.

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<v Speaker 2>The last Hollywood type things I did, you know what

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, Like I still had connections into the hip

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<v Speaker 2>hop world, and I I remember that night I took

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<v Speaker 2>two Brazilian girls, one was like a bathing suit model

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<v Speaker 2>that they were in New York and hanging around rock

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<v Speaker 2>Though's friends. His girlfriend was Brazilian. They all knew each other,

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<v Speaker 2>so I took them both to this party and looking

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<v Speaker 2>back with an asshole like really, I did that just

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<v Speaker 2>for Cloud obviously. I mean, my head must have been

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<v Speaker 2>so far up my ass. I can't believe it, even

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<v Speaker 2>like this is embarrassing. But when Harvey Weinstein, and at

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<v Speaker 2>that point his partner at Miramax's books was the famous

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<v Speaker 2>British editor Tina Brown, were working with me on my book,

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<v Speaker 2>and we had many meetings together.

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<v Speaker 1>And at big.

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<v Speaker 2>Meeting was we're taking pictures of aj because he wrote

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<v Speaker 2>they were gonna put an excerpt to my book in

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<v Speaker 2>Talk Magazine, Harvey Weinstein's magazine that Tina Brown was the

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<v Speaker 2>editor of. And uh okay, we're gonna do his shoot

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<v Speaker 2>at Lotus, which was the best night club in New York.

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<v Speaker 2>I went there every night. It was like my Cheers,

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<v Speaker 2>where everybody knows your name. I held court there on

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<v Speaker 2>top of the grand piano. It was a magical time.

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<v Speaker 2>So it's stage, the picture of stage with a red

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<v Speaker 2>velvet rope and people around.

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<v Speaker 3>The door can't get in, and me walking through the

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<v Speaker 3>through the aisle with this stunner six foot Brazilian blonde

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<v Speaker 3>model forget the name Anna something, I.

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<v Speaker 1>Forget, tall, beautiful, all her legs were up to my chest.

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<v Speaker 1>Just a monster.

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<v Speaker 2>And Harvey's like, this is gonna look great, and I'm

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00:16:09.240 --> 00:16:11.679
<v Speaker 2>such a what the fuck. I'm like, no, I want

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<v Speaker 2>two girls. He's like one, I said, I want to

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<v Speaker 2>have two girls, one on each arm. I think that's

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<v Speaker 2>even cooler. How many guys take two girls out? I mean,

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<v Speaker 2>of course it's been done, but I in my own

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<v Speaker 2>mind of narcissism, I'm like, I want too. He got

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<v Speaker 2>me another one. I forget her name, another stunter. And

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<v Speaker 2>that picture in that magazine ran with me walking through

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<v Speaker 2>the velvet ropes with people trying to kind of picture paparazzi.

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<v Speaker 2>It was stage, but that's that's the magazine world.

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<v Speaker 1>But I don't know.

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<v Speaker 2>I think I know that when I left New York

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<v Speaker 2>for Los Angeles, it made me feel alone and untethered.

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<v Speaker 2>That's a perfect word, because I was losing my way.

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<v Speaker 1>You know.

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<v Speaker 2>I missed Jack and Rowe and the guys, and the

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<v Speaker 2>guys I held down New York City with, whether it's Frankie, Giant, Mario, Joey, Jack, Chico,

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<v Speaker 2>you name it.

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<v Speaker 1>I missed them all terribly.

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<v Speaker 2>And I've told this to Mike and Kenny because they

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<v Speaker 2>thought I was out there, and they kind of were right.

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<v Speaker 1>For a while.

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<v Speaker 2>I was a little bit too fucking stupid and acted

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<v Speaker 2>like I was the shit, you know what I mean.

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<v Speaker 2>But I never felt that way, and I always longed

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<v Speaker 2>to be back with those guys, but they didn't know

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00:17:18.440 --> 00:17:21.240
<v Speaker 2>that with that's water under the bridge now.

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00:17:21.160 --> 00:17:22.359
<v Speaker 1>But that's the way they felt for a while.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't blame them, but I was taking those necessary

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<v Speaker 2>steps to become quote unquote famous. It's a dumb thing

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<v Speaker 2>to chase if you think about it, and I have,

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00:17:34.839 --> 00:17:36.799
<v Speaker 2>but I was very lucky to have a TV show

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<v Speaker 2>waiting for me as I landed in Los Angeles. Most people,

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<v Speaker 2>if not all, people, come to Los Angeles and chase

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00:17:44.079 --> 00:17:47.519
<v Speaker 2>the dream. Well, my dream was given to me on

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<v Speaker 2>a silver platter to host mysteries and scandals. There was

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00:17:50.119 --> 00:17:53.279
<v Speaker 2>no guarantee it would work or succeed, but the E

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00:17:53.480 --> 00:17:56.880
<v Speaker 2>Network gave me that shot. You know, here's your chance.

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<v Speaker 2>Can you be a TV star or pardon the word star?

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00:18:00.240 --> 00:18:02.640
<v Speaker 2>Can you be a TV host and make your your

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00:18:02.720 --> 00:18:05.680
<v Speaker 2>lane in that capacity? No guarantees it was gonna work

349
00:18:05.799 --> 00:18:08.880
<v Speaker 2>or succeed, But when I got to LA it was

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<v Speaker 2>like I wasn't.

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<v Speaker 1>I can't explain it. When I'm in New York. When

352
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<v Speaker 1>I used to be in New York.

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<v Speaker 2>I felt it from my heels up to my ass.

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<v Speaker 2>It's a different feeling standing in New York City. There's

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00:18:20.839 --> 00:18:23.880
<v Speaker 2>a rhythm, there's an energy about it.

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<v Speaker 1>It might sound corny or stupid to you.

357
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<v Speaker 2>I don't feel it in Illinois, although I love Illinois,

358
00:18:29.240 --> 00:18:30.279
<v Speaker 2>love Chicago, but I.

359
00:18:30.279 --> 00:18:34.160
<v Speaker 1>Don't feel anything on my feet. I have images in my.

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<v Speaker 2>Head of how beautiful it is and green and water

361
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<v Speaker 2>and nice people, well mannered.

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00:18:39.440 --> 00:18:41.400
<v Speaker 1>But in New York, my feet hit the ground.

363
00:18:41.440 --> 00:18:43.279
<v Speaker 2>I swear to God, there's an energy that shoots up

364
00:18:43.319 --> 00:18:47.720
<v Speaker 2>my legs into my immediate midsection area where a lot

365
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<v Speaker 2>of arousal is sparked and just fireworks.

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<v Speaker 1>I mean, you may have that feeling with where you live.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know. In La it was different.

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<v Speaker 2>You know those things in airports that what do they

369
00:19:02.599 --> 00:19:06.759
<v Speaker 2>call travelators, Those moving walkways that some people just stand

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<v Speaker 2>on and some people walk on while it's moving to

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<v Speaker 2>get to their gate, quicker whatever is. I felt like

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<v Speaker 2>I was on one of those things every day, all day,

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00:19:15.720 --> 00:19:18.440
<v Speaker 2>you know, because you got a team of people all

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00:19:18.480 --> 00:19:21.359
<v Speaker 2>of a sudden doing things to you, making plans to you,

375
00:19:21.440 --> 00:19:24.880
<v Speaker 2>arranging your schedule, photo shoots, gym appointments.

376
00:19:25.160 --> 00:19:26.160
<v Speaker 1>You know, what are you eating?

377
00:19:26.599 --> 00:19:29.400
<v Speaker 2>Everybody's eyes are on you because we're gonna sink a

378
00:19:29.440 --> 00:19:30.200
<v Speaker 2>lot of money into you.

379
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<v Speaker 1>Buster. Don't fuck up, you know.

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<v Speaker 2>Wardrobe trips to Barney's to get Mike suits to the episodes,

381
00:19:40.759 --> 00:19:43.680
<v Speaker 2>And that only happened because Johnny Boy Calvani, my man,

382
00:19:43.880 --> 00:19:46.599
<v Speaker 2>was friends with a guy named Michael Sharky who worked

383
00:19:46.640 --> 00:19:50.119
<v Speaker 2>at Barney's. In this special, how do I say this

384
00:19:50.680 --> 00:19:54.799
<v Speaker 2>when stars go in to shop, this is the guy.

385
00:19:54.920 --> 00:19:56.880
<v Speaker 2>Michael Sharky is one of those guys that can shut

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<v Speaker 2>the store down for a star that kind of shit.

387
00:19:59.599 --> 00:20:01.519
<v Speaker 1>Now, he didn't do that for me, But.

388
00:20:01.799 --> 00:20:06.960
<v Speaker 2>Because I knew Michael Sharkey, he was agreeable and amenable

389
00:20:07.519 --> 00:20:09.200
<v Speaker 2>and know that people were like this at the time

390
00:20:09.480 --> 00:20:12.119
<v Speaker 2>to let me wear suits at Barney's and return them

391
00:20:12.160 --> 00:20:15.240
<v Speaker 2>after they were dry, clean, properly, shirts, suits, ties, you

392
00:20:15.319 --> 00:20:18.359
<v Speaker 2>name it. Of course, the shoes I kept, but he

393
00:20:18.440 --> 00:20:21.480
<v Speaker 2>had a small budget, so I couldn't keep all the suits,

394
00:20:21.480 --> 00:20:22.480
<v Speaker 2>but I ended up.

395
00:20:22.359 --> 00:20:23.599
<v Speaker 1>With a lot of them. At the end of the day,

396
00:20:23.839 --> 00:20:25.559
<v Speaker 1>can't fit in any of them anymore.

397
00:20:25.559 --> 00:20:30.400
<v Speaker 2>But Michael arranged that at the time, only myself and

398
00:20:30.440 --> 00:20:35.319
<v Speaker 2>padd O'Brien, the TV host and sports sports analysts was

399
00:20:35.400 --> 00:20:38.200
<v Speaker 2>allowed to go to Barney's, get their clothes and return them.

400
00:20:38.519 --> 00:20:39.359
<v Speaker 1>It was a big deal.

401
00:20:40.519 --> 00:20:42.240
<v Speaker 2>I mean, it was kind of a big deal in

402
00:20:42.240 --> 00:20:45.400
<v Speaker 2>the sense that the family that owned Barney's, I know,

403
00:20:45.480 --> 00:20:48.640
<v Speaker 2>they air Jeene Pressman, came to my wedding because that's

404
00:20:48.680 --> 00:20:51.759
<v Speaker 2>how close people were together at Barney's, and that all

405
00:20:52.000 --> 00:20:54.079
<v Speaker 2>came from Johnny Boy Calvani's connections.

406
00:20:54.119 --> 00:20:56.319
<v Speaker 1>But with all those.

407
00:20:56.160 --> 00:20:59.400
<v Speaker 2>People and an entire network around me, it just helped

408
00:20:59.400 --> 00:21:01.799
<v Speaker 2>to keep my mind off how heart broken I really

409
00:21:01.920 --> 00:21:05.079
<v Speaker 2>was to leave New York City. But still, I mean,

410
00:21:05.119 --> 00:21:09.680
<v Speaker 2>I remember that day when I was told about getting

411
00:21:09.720 --> 00:21:12.720
<v Speaker 2>the gig, and of course I was happy, but I

412
00:21:12.839 --> 00:21:16.519
<v Speaker 2>was bitter. I felt bittersweet because I knew I had

413
00:21:16.559 --> 00:21:16.960
<v Speaker 2>to go.

414
00:21:17.400 --> 00:21:18.000
<v Speaker 1>I had to go.

415
00:21:18.680 --> 00:21:21.440
<v Speaker 2>I did always want to be on TV and movies

416
00:21:21.480 --> 00:21:23.279
<v Speaker 2>and be quote unquote famous.

417
00:21:23.759 --> 00:21:24.200
<v Speaker 1>You know what I mean.

418
00:21:25.480 --> 00:21:27.839
<v Speaker 2>That word fame is associated with me, whether you think

419
00:21:27.880 --> 00:21:31.079
<v Speaker 2>I was famous or not. It's just I can't hear

420
00:21:31.119 --> 00:21:33.640
<v Speaker 2>that word without thinking of me, the show, my book,

421
00:21:34.799 --> 00:21:37.839
<v Speaker 2>the TV show. It's just now, there are worse words

422
00:21:37.880 --> 00:21:39.920
<v Speaker 2>to have associated with your life, you know.

423
00:21:41.359 --> 00:21:43.839
<v Speaker 1>But I remember the day I knew I was going

424
00:21:43.920 --> 00:21:45.599
<v Speaker 1>to go. Plans were in effect.

425
00:21:45.640 --> 00:21:48.319
<v Speaker 2>I had, the tickets were sent, blah blah blah, and

426
00:21:48.400 --> 00:21:51.000
<v Speaker 2>I went to my ex girlfriend, Calie Young's apartment in

427
00:21:51.039 --> 00:21:55.079
<v Speaker 2>the West Village, and you know, I was crying where

428
00:21:55.079 --> 00:21:57.000
<v Speaker 2>he sat in the back patio, and I cried that

429
00:21:57.079 --> 00:21:57.559
<v Speaker 2>I got to go.

430
00:21:57.680 --> 00:22:00.359
<v Speaker 1>And you know, I was already thinking of before I

431
00:22:00.400 --> 00:22:01.000
<v Speaker 1>even went there.

432
00:22:01.000 --> 00:22:02.960
<v Speaker 2>I was taking how soon can I get back, how

433
00:22:02.960 --> 00:22:04.039
<v Speaker 2>often can I get back?

434
00:22:04.079 --> 00:22:07.119
<v Speaker 1>How long can I stay? You know that kind of shit, and.

435
00:22:07.960 --> 00:22:10.839
<v Speaker 2>Anything to try and make this long distance relationship work.

436
00:22:11.119 --> 00:22:13.039
<v Speaker 2>It worked when we lived a half a mile apart,

437
00:22:13.359 --> 00:22:19.319
<v Speaker 2>but three thousand miles that's tough. And she saw my tears.

438
00:22:19.400 --> 00:22:22.519
<v Speaker 2>She cried too, but she straightened me out. And I

439
00:22:22.559 --> 00:22:24.799
<v Speaker 2>don't want to sound corny, but she said to me,

440
00:22:25.400 --> 00:22:28.279
<v Speaker 2>you're a star. I mean again, I feel funny saying

441
00:22:28.279 --> 00:22:30.000
<v Speaker 2>that we use that word star a lot back in

442
00:22:30.039 --> 00:22:32.279
<v Speaker 2>the day whenever we see people in New York who

443
00:22:32.279 --> 00:22:32.759
<v Speaker 2>are doing great.

444
00:22:32.759 --> 00:22:35.000
<v Speaker 1>But we said that he's a fine star. I don't

445
00:22:35.039 --> 00:22:36.559
<v Speaker 1>mean it in the sense like a movie star, but

446
00:22:36.640 --> 00:22:38.319
<v Speaker 1>we said that she's a star.

447
00:22:38.799 --> 00:22:41.240
<v Speaker 2>It's just the word we use. And she said, you're

448
00:22:41.240 --> 00:22:43.200
<v Speaker 2>a star. You've been a star here in New York City.

449
00:22:43.279 --> 00:22:44.960
<v Speaker 2>Now you got to go be one in LA. You

450
00:22:45.039 --> 00:22:48.480
<v Speaker 2>have to grant this and be You give her a

451
00:22:48.480 --> 00:22:51.279
<v Speaker 2>lot of credit for standing up like that. But I

452
00:22:51.400 --> 00:22:54.960
<v Speaker 2>knew we'd no longer be together. I knew i'd lose her.

453
00:22:55.759 --> 00:22:58.240
<v Speaker 2>I knew the miles would be very hard on us.

454
00:22:59.680 --> 00:23:04.799
<v Speaker 2>But you know, truth be told, A lot has been

455
00:23:04.839 --> 00:23:08.599
<v Speaker 2>said about she then moving on to Donald Trump and

456
00:23:08.599 --> 00:23:12.319
<v Speaker 2>how it made me so terribly angry, Like I'm talking,

457
00:23:12.599 --> 00:23:15.640
<v Speaker 2>filled with rage I never have felt before or I've

458
00:23:15.680 --> 00:23:16.559
<v Speaker 2>ever felt since.

459
00:23:17.160 --> 00:23:17.640
<v Speaker 1>You know what I mean.

460
00:23:17.680 --> 00:23:19.960
<v Speaker 2>It was the kind of anger that that song by

461
00:23:20.000 --> 00:23:23.799
<v Speaker 2>Cypress Hill here is something you can't understand. How I

462
00:23:23.799 --> 00:23:26.240
<v Speaker 2>could just kill a man that was beating in my

463
00:23:26.279 --> 00:23:29.279
<v Speaker 2>head every fucking I threatened to kill him on the

464
00:23:29.279 --> 00:23:33.960
<v Speaker 2>Howards Thronshaw Live. I was nuts, But I'd be lying

465
00:23:34.039 --> 00:23:38.200
<v Speaker 2>if I said that. When I got to Los Angeles,

466
00:23:39.200 --> 00:23:43.519
<v Speaker 2>I began to be blinded by the beauty around me everywhere,

467
00:23:43.880 --> 00:23:46.839
<v Speaker 2>not only in my office, in my apartment complex, in

468
00:23:46.920 --> 00:23:48.279
<v Speaker 2>every night club, every bar.

469
00:23:48.640 --> 00:23:50.039
<v Speaker 1>And when you're a.

470
00:23:50.000 --> 00:23:52.640
<v Speaker 2>Guy on TV and you got a little game and

471
00:23:52.680 --> 00:23:55.400
<v Speaker 2>you're decent looking, and you wearing the nice suits and whatever,

472
00:23:55.519 --> 00:23:57.319
<v Speaker 2>you got a good line of shit you're from New York.

473
00:23:57.400 --> 00:24:00.839
<v Speaker 2>You're talking quicker and faster than any guy Los Angeles.

474
00:24:01.119 --> 00:24:04.319
<v Speaker 1>The girls come around, and then you begin to what well.

475
00:24:04.480 --> 00:24:08.400
<v Speaker 2>I began to weigh allse miles, I'm not gonna see

476
00:24:08.440 --> 00:24:11.640
<v Speaker 2>you for three weeks. This beautiful woman is presenting herself

477
00:24:11.680 --> 00:24:16.400
<v Speaker 2>to me. I began to, you know, have a lot

478
00:24:16.400 --> 00:24:20.759
<v Speaker 2>of fun before the Donald Trump shit began. So as

479
00:24:20.799 --> 00:24:22.920
<v Speaker 2>mad as I was that that happened, I was no

480
00:24:23.000 --> 00:24:26.160
<v Speaker 2>fucking boy scout, you know what I mean, So that

481
00:24:26.279 --> 00:24:29.599
<v Speaker 2>that part never gets said in this whole conversation about Trump.

482
00:24:30.240 --> 00:24:32.400
<v Speaker 2>I haven't listened to me and him arguing on stern

483
00:24:32.480 --> 00:24:35.359
<v Speaker 2>for several years. But whatever I do, it makes me win.

484
00:24:35.559 --> 00:24:37.440
<v Speaker 2>Some of the things I said about him, if you

485
00:24:37.519 --> 00:24:40.480
<v Speaker 2>stack it up with how much I love him now,

486
00:24:40.839 --> 00:24:43.359
<v Speaker 2>like I am crazy about him. I'd rather see him.

487
00:24:43.640 --> 00:24:46.319
<v Speaker 2>I want to see a Trump TV channel, just have

488
00:24:46.440 --> 00:24:48.799
<v Speaker 2>him on all day like Sea Span. I want to

489
00:24:48.799 --> 00:24:51.000
<v Speaker 2>watch him walk in the oval, get on the phone.

490
00:24:51.519 --> 00:24:53.920
<v Speaker 2>I just do because I'll tell you some guys, I'm

491
00:24:53.920 --> 00:24:56.960
<v Speaker 2>not going to make it political. I was around him,

492
00:24:57.319 --> 00:25:02.000
<v Speaker 2>you know, the billionaire building and the fucking phone calls,

493
00:25:02.039 --> 00:25:04.680
<v Speaker 2>he got, the women around him, the swagger he had,

494
00:25:05.079 --> 00:25:08.920
<v Speaker 2>He had everything never thought of as a president, but man,

495
00:25:08.960 --> 00:25:11.920
<v Speaker 2>he was as.

496
00:25:11.079 --> 00:25:12.279
<v Speaker 1>Big as one of his buildings.

497
00:25:13.279 --> 00:25:17.880
<v Speaker 2>And I just love what he's doing with the country,

498
00:25:17.920 --> 00:25:20.000
<v Speaker 2>and I love the fact that I knew him and

499
00:25:20.119 --> 00:25:22.640
<v Speaker 2>know him, and I swear in the next three and

500
00:25:22.640 --> 00:25:24.559
<v Speaker 2>a half years, I got to get down tomorrow Lago

501
00:25:24.599 --> 00:25:28.519
<v Speaker 2>and make sure he knows how much I've been, you know,

502
00:25:29.079 --> 00:25:31.400
<v Speaker 2>been behind him and did my share of whatever I

503
00:25:31.400 --> 00:25:31.799
<v Speaker 2>could do.

504
00:25:32.079 --> 00:25:34.440
<v Speaker 1>He's unlike any president we've ever had.

505
00:25:34.960 --> 00:25:37.000
<v Speaker 2>I know, he's got qualities that make people pissed off,

506
00:25:37.000 --> 00:25:40.359
<v Speaker 2>but there's so many great qualities about him that time

507
00:25:40.559 --> 00:25:43.279
<v Speaker 2>will be the final judge. I think, all right, this

508
00:25:43.359 --> 00:25:46.680
<v Speaker 2>is sounding insane. He's not gonna be Winston Churchill. There's

509
00:25:46.680 --> 00:25:49.920
<v Speaker 2>no big war in America right now. But I think

510
00:25:49.960 --> 00:25:52.480
<v Speaker 2>that his name in the next thirty forty years, when

511
00:25:52.480 --> 00:25:55.680
<v Speaker 2>all this bullshit calms down from the progressives and everything else,

512
00:25:55.799 --> 00:25:57.720
<v Speaker 2>he'll be known as one of the greatest men of

513
00:25:57.759 --> 00:26:01.440
<v Speaker 2>his era, along with Elon Musk. Right now, the verdict

514
00:26:01.480 --> 00:26:04.279
<v Speaker 2>is still out because so many people disbelieve what he

515
00:26:04.359 --> 00:26:06.039
<v Speaker 2>sees and what Elon sees and jd.

516
00:26:06.200 --> 00:26:07.160
<v Speaker 1>Vance has yet to do.

517
00:26:07.519 --> 00:26:10.559
<v Speaker 2>It's gonna be fine anyway, I'm way off the point,

518
00:26:11.680 --> 00:26:12.240
<v Speaker 2>you get it.

519
00:26:12.359 --> 00:26:15.519
<v Speaker 1>So it was a different time to come out.

520
00:26:15.400 --> 00:26:17.880
<v Speaker 2>To LA and make it and try to make it

521
00:26:17.920 --> 00:26:20.839
<v Speaker 2>and get bigger and bigger, and either way, eventually I

522
00:26:20.880 --> 00:26:21.440
<v Speaker 2>settled down.

523
00:26:21.559 --> 00:26:22.640
<v Speaker 1>I got used to La.

524
00:26:22.759 --> 00:26:25.079
<v Speaker 2>I would go back to New York time and again,

525
00:26:25.119 --> 00:26:28.000
<v Speaker 2>and when I did, I would say with her. If

526
00:26:28.000 --> 00:26:30.400
<v Speaker 2>I wasn't alone island, I was staying with her, either

527
00:26:30.440 --> 00:26:33.160
<v Speaker 2>at a hotel or at her apartment. And then it

528
00:26:33.279 --> 00:26:36.799
<v Speaker 2>got fuzzy because that's when we kind of crossed swords

529
00:26:37.279 --> 00:26:38.640
<v Speaker 2>one of my trips, I was with her.

530
00:26:38.839 --> 00:26:40.559
<v Speaker 1>The next trip, I see him and her in a

531
00:26:40.640 --> 00:26:42.480
<v Speaker 1>magazine that I'm back in New York. I'm with her.

532
00:26:42.640 --> 00:26:46.200
<v Speaker 1>It got weird, and god, I'm glad it's all over.

533
00:26:46.279 --> 00:26:50.279
<v Speaker 1>It was a horrible time, but I loved it. I

534
00:26:50.279 --> 00:26:52.000
<v Speaker 1>loved our relationship. I love the man.

535
00:26:52.480 --> 00:26:56.000
<v Speaker 2>We've all moved on with families, new wives and husbands,

536
00:26:56.039 --> 00:26:59.480
<v Speaker 2>and it's way over. But it is what it is.

537
00:27:00.440 --> 00:27:02.039
<v Speaker 2>I'm getting way off the topic. I want to talk

538
00:27:02.039 --> 00:27:09.119
<v Speaker 2>about Naomi Watts and leave Schreiber's youngest kid, Kai Schreiber. Okay, uh,

539
00:27:09.400 --> 00:27:14.799
<v Speaker 2>careful trigger. Whenever you hear a name that's not quite decipherable, girl,

540
00:27:14.799 --> 00:27:20.400
<v Speaker 2>a boy Kai. Okay, this is the new world. Genderless

541
00:27:20.480 --> 00:27:23.160
<v Speaker 2>names whatever you wanna call him, uh names that could

542
00:27:23.200 --> 00:27:25.759
<v Speaker 2>be either gender. We gotta go down the rabbit hole

543
00:27:25.799 --> 00:27:28.680
<v Speaker 2>to find out, get to know the kid, the special kid.

544
00:27:28.839 --> 00:27:32.039
<v Speaker 1>They're all special. Nobody has a transgender kid and has

545
00:27:32.039 --> 00:27:34.160
<v Speaker 1>a problem with them that they can say. He's just

546
00:27:34.240 --> 00:27:36.559
<v Speaker 1>like any other kid, or she's just like any other kid.

547
00:27:36.599 --> 00:27:37.559
<v Speaker 1>They're pain in the ass.

548
00:27:37.839 --> 00:27:41.400
<v Speaker 2>Everybody who's got a trans kid acts like they are miraculous.

549
00:27:41.640 --> 00:27:42.920
<v Speaker 1>Hold on water break.

550
00:27:45.119 --> 00:27:49.160
<v Speaker 2>And it bugs me. It bugs me. We all think

551
00:27:49.160 --> 00:27:51.079
<v Speaker 2>our kids are miraculous. We all think our kids are

552
00:27:51.640 --> 00:27:55.119
<v Speaker 2>are the bomb and the best. Won't tell me your

553
00:27:55.200 --> 00:27:58.039
<v Speaker 2>kid who already arrived. God, don't get mad at me,

554
00:27:58.400 --> 00:28:02.160
<v Speaker 2>a little fucked up in ahead. Now he's miraculous. So

555
00:28:02.640 --> 00:28:08.039
<v Speaker 2>this kid Kai walked the runway for Valentino at Paris

556
00:28:08.119 --> 00:28:12.119
<v Speaker 2>Fashion Week. She's six off, it's sixteen years old. Uses

557
00:28:12.279 --> 00:28:17.880
<v Speaker 2>she her pronouns obviously was born a boy sixteen years ago,

558
00:28:18.640 --> 00:28:22.240
<v Speaker 2>but walk the catwalk wearing all these crazy outfits, leopard

559
00:28:22.279 --> 00:28:25.039
<v Speaker 2>print mini dresses. You know, got long legs like her mother,

560
00:28:25.720 --> 00:28:29.440
<v Speaker 2>but the girl's got her face like her father. The girl,

561
00:28:30.119 --> 00:28:37.480
<v Speaker 2>this transvestite or transgender person looks like Ray Donovan in

562
00:28:37.519 --> 00:28:40.720
<v Speaker 2>a mini dress. It doesn't work on the runway. The

563
00:28:40.839 --> 00:28:42.799
<v Speaker 2>days are gone when models walk down the room with

564
00:28:42.920 --> 00:28:45.559
<v Speaker 2>a sullen, serious face like every bad thing in the

565
00:28:45.599 --> 00:28:49.599
<v Speaker 2>world just happened to them that day. Smile, beat chipper,

566
00:28:49.799 --> 00:28:52.640
<v Speaker 2>give a wink, blow a kiss. When monos throughout the

567
00:28:52.640 --> 00:28:55.480
<v Speaker 2>crowd goes wild. I loved fashion Week. I was always

568
00:28:55.759 --> 00:28:58.640
<v Speaker 2>front row speaking the Devil with Donald Trump and Russell

569
00:28:58.720 --> 00:29:02.039
<v Speaker 2>Simmons and other people. People who've been Pete Diddy, a

570
00:29:02.039 --> 00:29:05.400
<v Speaker 2>lot of bad guys who've been put away. Some became president,

571
00:29:06.039 --> 00:29:11.759
<v Speaker 2>some became podcasters. But she, I'm sorry, I'm gonna say

572
00:29:11.759 --> 00:29:13.559
<v Speaker 2>she because it's a model I'm talking about. I know

573
00:29:13.599 --> 00:29:16.160
<v Speaker 2>it's a boy, and I don't know. Well, I'm sure

574
00:29:16.160 --> 00:29:19.599
<v Speaker 2>there's no operation yet. She he still has the package in.

575
00:29:19.559 --> 00:29:22.240
<v Speaker 1>The middle of his pants, so it's all weird to me.

576
00:29:22.359 --> 00:29:24.559
<v Speaker 2>It'll never make sense to me. And I'm sure their

577
00:29:24.559 --> 00:29:26.400
<v Speaker 2>appearent's out there right now. Or listen to the show

578
00:29:26.400 --> 00:29:29.839
<v Speaker 2>who might have a kid that's trans. My heart goes

579
00:29:29.839 --> 00:29:32.960
<v Speaker 2>out to you. I'm not stupid. I don't think.

580
00:29:34.160 --> 00:29:34.839
<v Speaker 1>How I say this.

581
00:29:35.799 --> 00:29:38.640
<v Speaker 2>It's so hard to go through life as just a

582
00:29:38.720 --> 00:29:41.440
<v Speaker 2>sixteen year old kid, whether you're a boy or girl

583
00:29:42.039 --> 00:29:47.319
<v Speaker 2>to transition, who would heap that much more trouble on

584
00:29:47.359 --> 00:29:50.400
<v Speaker 2>their back? Like I said, life's hard enough, and it

585
00:29:50.480 --> 00:29:53.880
<v Speaker 2>fucking bites back. So I don't know what to say.

586
00:29:53.960 --> 00:29:56.960
<v Speaker 2>I don't think they're all lying, but I think a

587
00:29:56.960 --> 00:29:57.720
<v Speaker 2>lot of it is a lie.

588
00:29:57.799 --> 00:29:59.720
<v Speaker 1>I just do. I think it's a cry for a

589
00:29:59.759 --> 00:30:04.240
<v Speaker 1>ten clout. Is that sounds weird? I apologize, but.

590
00:30:04.200 --> 00:30:07.119
<v Speaker 2>I don't believe it all, not not every It's like

591
00:30:07.279 --> 00:30:08.519
<v Speaker 2>it's like these rape cases.

592
00:30:08.680 --> 00:30:10.079
<v Speaker 1>I don't believe all the cases.

593
00:30:11.279 --> 00:30:14.920
<v Speaker 2>I don't believe all these transgender cases are all the same.

594
00:30:15.319 --> 00:30:19.359
<v Speaker 2>Believe all women, no, believe all transgenders. Absolutely not believe

595
00:30:19.359 --> 00:30:21.880
<v Speaker 2>all men. No, everybody's different.

596
00:30:22.559 --> 00:30:25.680
<v Speaker 1>But we treat these transgenders like they're so miracted, gifts

597
00:30:25.680 --> 00:30:27.119
<v Speaker 1>from the heavens, none than that.

598
00:30:29.799 --> 00:30:32.160
<v Speaker 2>And look their parents, so of course they're gonna be

599
00:30:32.160 --> 00:30:35.799
<v Speaker 2>there looking over and writing tweets about how gorgeous she

600
00:30:35.880 --> 00:30:37.119
<v Speaker 2>looked and he looked.

601
00:30:37.119 --> 00:30:39.680
<v Speaker 1>Whatever you want to say, might be still my beating heart.

602
00:30:39.759 --> 00:30:45.000
<v Speaker 2>Naomi Watts said, live, so that's my Mason Valentino.

603
00:30:45.119 --> 00:30:50.559
<v Speaker 1>Baby, I'm squealing with pride. Okay, I've met lev.

604
00:30:50.400 --> 00:30:53.680
<v Speaker 2>Actually it was in a movie with him, Ransom, great

605
00:30:53.720 --> 00:30:58.799
<v Speaker 2>fucking guy. I mean, one of the most serious actors

606
00:30:58.880 --> 00:31:01.599
<v Speaker 2>out there. Do I think he's lying?

607
00:31:01.880 --> 00:31:04.759
<v Speaker 1>No, he loves his child, she loves her child. I

608
00:31:04.839 --> 00:31:08.920
<v Speaker 1>get it, but I don't know what are we doing.

609
00:31:09.680 --> 00:31:10.440
<v Speaker 1>And then all the.

610
00:31:10.400 --> 00:31:15.279
<v Speaker 2>Other people out there with Linda Evangelista and the kid

611
00:31:15.359 --> 00:31:19.319
<v Speaker 2>that's Amelia Hamlet, Lisa Renna, and Harry Hammerin's life, they

612
00:31:19.319 --> 00:31:21.599
<v Speaker 2>have to go on the internet and say how great

613
00:31:21.640 --> 00:31:22.799
<v Speaker 2>and beautiful she look.

614
00:31:23.319 --> 00:31:28.200
<v Speaker 1>No, she didn't, she didn't. Can we just stop this?

615
00:31:28.680 --> 00:31:32.240
<v Speaker 2>It's no different than calling Lizzo healthy and that's the look,

616
00:31:32.279 --> 00:31:35.559
<v Speaker 2>and she looks great, and she shocked people with this outfit.

617
00:31:37.000 --> 00:31:40.119
<v Speaker 1>People are blown away by Lizzo a bikini. We got

618
00:31:40.160 --> 00:31:41.319
<v Speaker 1>a fucker. Stop.

619
00:31:42.400 --> 00:31:45.559
<v Speaker 2>Amy Shuma walked into a restaurant the other day with

620
00:31:46.240 --> 00:31:49.799
<v Speaker 2>a long dressed I had horizontal stripes. Anybody with a

621
00:31:49.799 --> 00:31:52.920
<v Speaker 2>weight issue do not wear horizontal stripes in a dress,

622
00:31:53.480 --> 00:31:56.559
<v Speaker 2>big bold, horizontal stripes. And of course the caption was

623
00:31:56.680 --> 00:31:59.960
<v Speaker 2>Amy sure was stunts. I'm fucking stunned at anybody look

624
00:32:00.160 --> 00:32:03.960
<v Speaker 2>her well recorded her. Give me a break. This is

625
00:32:04.000 --> 00:32:07.519
<v Speaker 2>no longer a fan. This whole transgender bullshit and Hollywood

626
00:32:07.519 --> 00:32:08.599
<v Speaker 2>family is thinking it's great.

627
00:32:08.960 --> 00:32:13.079
<v Speaker 1>This is the normal in Hollywood, many not many.

628
00:32:13.200 --> 00:32:16.400
<v Speaker 2>Several years ago, when I was doing Lonette Corolla's podcast,

629
00:32:16.680 --> 00:32:19.480
<v Speaker 2>I Forget, and I'm glad I forgot her partner's name

630
00:32:19.559 --> 00:32:21.200
<v Speaker 2>because I don't I don't listen to that show.

631
00:32:22.200 --> 00:32:24.920
<v Speaker 1>But at the time, Lynette and I were getting tight.

632
00:32:24.720 --> 00:32:26.039
<v Speaker 2>And she was really sweet to me, and I was

633
00:32:26.039 --> 00:32:29.319
<v Speaker 2>getting enveloped in the Corolla family and I loved it.

634
00:32:29.480 --> 00:32:32.039
<v Speaker 1>They're great people. Linette and Adam are great people. I

635
00:32:32.680 --> 00:32:35.119
<v Speaker 1>hate that I'm not. I'm no longer on his radar.

636
00:32:35.160 --> 00:32:38.799
<v Speaker 2>And it's just nothing happened between Lonett and I was

637
00:32:38.839 --> 00:32:39.680
<v Speaker 2>written up and read it.

638
00:32:39.680 --> 00:32:41.920
<v Speaker 1>We had an affair. We did not. It's all bullshit,

639
00:32:42.640 --> 00:32:44.799
<v Speaker 1>but I know. I also came out.

640
00:32:44.640 --> 00:32:47.000
<v Speaker 2>Of the hospital after thirty days and needing a story

641
00:32:47.000 --> 00:32:49.160
<v Speaker 2>from my podcast, and I knew they were getting a divorce.

642
00:32:49.720 --> 00:32:53.480
<v Speaker 2>No one knew but me, well only journalists who knew

643
00:32:53.559 --> 00:32:56.400
<v Speaker 2>was me, and I settled on the show and that

644
00:32:56.400 --> 00:33:00.359
<v Speaker 2>that was not something he thought. I think he didn't

645
00:33:00.400 --> 00:33:03.119
<v Speaker 2>like that I did that. I understand, I understand, but

646
00:33:03.160 --> 00:33:05.359
<v Speaker 2>I wanted a big story, to get back on the

647
00:33:05.359 --> 00:33:07.519
<v Speaker 2>horse and have you guys say, hey, AJ's back with

648
00:33:07.559 --> 00:33:11.119
<v Speaker 2>a big story. Whatever it was, I regretted, and I'm

649
00:33:11.160 --> 00:33:13.240
<v Speaker 2>out of the Corolla fold. But that fold is all

650
00:33:13.319 --> 00:33:15.559
<v Speaker 2>weird now too. Adam is gone, but that who know

651
00:33:15.599 --> 00:33:18.119
<v Speaker 2>how fuck knows. She's got a new girlfriend. She's got

652
00:33:18.160 --> 00:33:20.720
<v Speaker 2>a guy. He's living in Marlable. The house burns down.

653
00:33:20.799 --> 00:33:22.440
<v Speaker 2>Now he's in Nevada building another house.

654
00:33:22.559 --> 00:33:23.279
<v Speaker 1>It's all weird.

655
00:33:25.039 --> 00:33:28.039
<v Speaker 2>But her partner on her podcast was a woman who

656
00:33:28.039 --> 00:33:30.960
<v Speaker 2>had a transgender child, and every I swear to God,

657
00:33:31.759 --> 00:33:34.559
<v Speaker 2>almost every time she brought up her kid, she would

658
00:33:34.599 --> 00:33:37.519
<v Speaker 2>always start the sentence by saying, well, I have a

659
00:33:37.559 --> 00:33:41.519
<v Speaker 2>transgender child and whatever. It was, little league, sports, health

660
00:33:41.559 --> 00:33:43.599
<v Speaker 2>and diet. I don't care what I was talking about

661
00:33:43.599 --> 00:33:47.279
<v Speaker 2>on the podcast. Oh well, it's funny he said it.

662
00:33:47.359 --> 00:33:49.559
<v Speaker 2>My child is transgender. And I finally said, I know

663
00:33:50.160 --> 00:33:52.480
<v Speaker 2>you said it like four times. It's like me saying, well,

664
00:33:52.519 --> 00:33:54.799
<v Speaker 2>my son Rock was six feet and he thinks this,

665
00:33:55.559 --> 00:33:56.279
<v Speaker 2>Oh what does he eat?

666
00:33:56.279 --> 00:33:59.200
<v Speaker 1>Well, he's six feet Now, shut the fuck up. It's

667
00:33:59.240 --> 00:33:59.880
<v Speaker 1>not special.

668
00:34:00.400 --> 00:34:02.319
<v Speaker 2>You're not gonna get special treatment for me because your

669
00:34:02.440 --> 00:34:03.079
<v Speaker 2>kid's trends.

670
00:34:03.759 --> 00:34:03.960
<v Speaker 1>Oh.

671
00:34:04.079 --> 00:34:05.960
<v Speaker 2>She came at me on the internet, called me a

672
00:34:06.000 --> 00:34:06.839
<v Speaker 2>pile of bullshit.

673
00:34:07.079 --> 00:34:09.639
<v Speaker 1>I went back at her. Lynette was laughing because between

674
00:34:09.679 --> 00:34:12.599
<v Speaker 1>me and you, Lenet can't stand her. But she did this.

675
00:34:13.199 --> 00:34:14.880
<v Speaker 1>I guess they're still doing it. I don't even know.

676
00:34:15.119 --> 00:34:18.360
<v Speaker 2>But she did it back then because she needed more

677
00:34:18.360 --> 00:34:21.719
<v Speaker 2>of a profile because Adam and her were starting businesses

678
00:34:21.880 --> 00:34:24.559
<v Speaker 2>like Corolla Drinks, and she was responsible for that. It

679
00:34:24.599 --> 00:34:27.760
<v Speaker 2>was a whole thing that they did to market their products.

680
00:34:27.800 --> 00:34:32.440
<v Speaker 2>And I understand good hustle on both their parts. But

681
00:34:32.559 --> 00:34:35.039
<v Speaker 2>either way, I don't even know where this show's going.

682
00:34:35.079 --> 00:34:37.360
<v Speaker 2>I'm just blabbing today. Thank you for letting me just

683
00:34:37.360 --> 00:34:39.639
<v Speaker 2>talk and talk and talk. But I do want to

684
00:34:39.679 --> 00:34:48.079
<v Speaker 2>say before I go. Jack Kirouac, the famous author. He

685
00:34:48.199 --> 00:34:50.000
<v Speaker 2>died well today's March twelfth.

686
00:34:50.039 --> 00:34:54.880
<v Speaker 1>Today. He died March twelfth, nineteen sixty nine. And he

687
00:34:55.079 --> 00:34:58.440
<v Speaker 1>was a guy that I'm sure you've read all many

688
00:34:58.519 --> 00:34:58.880
<v Speaker 1>you've read.

689
00:34:58.920 --> 00:35:01.800
<v Speaker 2>Read On the Road, one of the first books I

690
00:35:01.920 --> 00:35:04.400
<v Speaker 2>dove into when I really got into writing and wanted

691
00:35:04.440 --> 00:35:06.840
<v Speaker 2>to know more about the Sallengers and the Kiillacs and

692
00:35:06.840 --> 00:35:08.639
<v Speaker 2>the hunterres Thompson's.

693
00:35:08.440 --> 00:35:09.239
<v Speaker 1>And I dove in.

694
00:35:09.519 --> 00:35:12.519
<v Speaker 2>I'm not a big Hunter s Thompson guy, not really

695
00:35:12.880 --> 00:35:18.199
<v Speaker 2>Salinger genius, Killac, so bold and so brave and so

696
00:35:18.480 --> 00:35:22.599
<v Speaker 2>fucking crazy for words that he got me at Hello

697
00:35:22.679 --> 00:35:27.079
<v Speaker 2>put it that way. But this guy was involved in

698
00:35:27.199 --> 00:35:30.159
<v Speaker 2>the jazz era of the poetry era, the beatnick ear.

699
00:35:30.199 --> 00:35:33.280
<v Speaker 2>He was a beat poet, a drift, or a dreamer,

700
00:35:34.440 --> 00:35:37.639
<v Speaker 2>and he just every time he put pen to paper

701
00:35:37.719 --> 00:35:40.679
<v Speaker 2>or a typewrite to paper, I saw everything he said.

702
00:35:41.599 --> 00:35:44.360
<v Speaker 2>But I wanted to just end the show talking about

703
00:35:44.440 --> 00:35:47.719
<v Speaker 2>him because of his spirit, the fact that he most

704
00:35:47.719 --> 00:35:49.719
<v Speaker 2>of the time when he wrote things, he was making

705
00:35:49.800 --> 00:35:52.880
<v Speaker 2>us well, reminding us is a better word, reminding us

706
00:35:52.960 --> 00:35:58.280
<v Speaker 2>to live, to just go have new experiences, and for

707
00:35:58.360 --> 00:36:03.880
<v Speaker 2>me that meant women jobs, chasing fun, going to different countries,

708
00:36:03.960 --> 00:36:06.159
<v Speaker 2>going to countries behind the iron curtain.

709
00:36:06.559 --> 00:36:08.480
<v Speaker 1>Just let's have a love of fair and Cuba.

710
00:36:08.519 --> 00:36:11.679
<v Speaker 2>Why not just crazy shit, go out there and get

711
00:36:11.679 --> 00:36:15.079
<v Speaker 2>a story, bring a story back. And that's what I

712
00:36:15.159 --> 00:36:16.760
<v Speaker 2>was as a writer, even when I was doing high

713
00:36:16.760 --> 00:36:19.239
<v Speaker 2>school sports. Go watch the game, bring back a story.

714
00:36:19.480 --> 00:36:23.360
<v Speaker 2>I love that simple sentence. It's what I do every day.

715
00:36:24.360 --> 00:36:27.000
<v Speaker 2>But Kirawak was one of the first writers who really

716
00:36:27.400 --> 00:36:35.199
<v Speaker 2>made me understand about living loud. So I think today

717
00:36:35.400 --> 00:36:39.039
<v Speaker 2>we should celebrate this guy, the King of beats. Grab

718
00:36:39.079 --> 00:36:41.119
<v Speaker 2>one of his books if you got them, read some

719
00:36:41.199 --> 00:36:43.239
<v Speaker 2>pages to your kids, even read them to the dog.

720
00:36:43.320 --> 00:36:46.280
<v Speaker 1>You know, Andrew's been reading a book. She's reading right now,

721
00:36:46.760 --> 00:36:47.119
<v Speaker 1>and the.

722
00:36:47.079 --> 00:36:50.119
<v Speaker 2>Two dogs, Tutsi and Gizmo stare at her face while

723
00:36:50.159 --> 00:36:52.800
<v Speaker 2>she reads aloud, and they like it, and they begin

724
00:36:52.880 --> 00:36:55.079
<v Speaker 2>to fall asleep when she starts to fall a thing.

725
00:36:55.320 --> 00:36:57.320
<v Speaker 2>It's a very strong These logs are fucking human, I

726
00:36:57.320 --> 00:37:00.559
<v Speaker 2>swear to God. If you see pictures, they're human. And

727
00:37:02.320 --> 00:37:04.119
<v Speaker 2>grab a Curauacic book if you got on the road,

728
00:37:04.280 --> 00:37:06.519
<v Speaker 2>Read a few paragraphs, read a few pages, or finish

729
00:37:06.599 --> 00:37:07.880
<v Speaker 2>the book in one city if you want.

730
00:37:08.079 --> 00:37:10.639
<v Speaker 1>But get him into your head and heart.

731
00:37:11.519 --> 00:37:13.440
<v Speaker 2>I'm sure you've got a dusty shelf in the garage

732
00:37:13.519 --> 00:37:15.760
<v Speaker 2>or a bookshelf somewhere that has one of his books.

733
00:37:15.920 --> 00:37:20.920
<v Speaker 2>Go grab it. Read his poems too, man, his poems

734
00:37:20.960 --> 00:37:26.079
<v Speaker 2>are great. Turn up the music, you know. Kirouac once said.

735
00:37:26.079 --> 00:37:29.239
<v Speaker 2>One of the greatest quotes to me is the only

736
00:37:29.320 --> 00:37:31.440
<v Speaker 2>truth is music, he said, And you know me with

737
00:37:31.559 --> 00:37:34.079
<v Speaker 2>music that I believe that. Before I read that, I

738
00:37:34.079 --> 00:37:36.239
<v Speaker 2>don't know. But music has always affected me in a

739
00:37:36.239 --> 00:37:42.400
<v Speaker 2>great way. And it's true. Music is the only truth, man.

740
00:37:43.280 --> 00:37:45.719
<v Speaker 2>But in the spirit of Jack Kirouac. I think we

741
00:37:45.800 --> 00:37:50.559
<v Speaker 2>need to let ourselves live, man, you know, just forget

742
00:37:50.559 --> 00:37:55.199
<v Speaker 2>about the bullshit on TV, the pre Palestine and doze

743
00:37:55.320 --> 00:37:57.079
<v Speaker 2>and every just forget.

744
00:37:56.719 --> 00:37:58.159
<v Speaker 1>It all for a few days.

745
00:37:58.679 --> 00:38:02.119
<v Speaker 2>Go outside, sleep outside if you want, Go look at

746
00:38:02.119 --> 00:38:05.440
<v Speaker 2>the stars at night. Go go climb a mountain, Go

747
00:38:05.480 --> 00:38:09.119
<v Speaker 2>walk down a dark alley, Go dancing if you can

748
00:38:09.119 --> 00:38:10.599
<v Speaker 2>find a dance hall somewhere.

749
00:38:12.199 --> 00:38:16.159
<v Speaker 1>In his words, go mad for the day. You know,

750
00:38:16.320 --> 00:38:18.800
<v Speaker 1>get on the highway, just go do it.

751
00:38:18.880 --> 00:38:23.760
<v Speaker 2>Do something, something out of the ordinary, something that.

752
00:38:23.480 --> 00:38:24.559
<v Speaker 1>Stirs your blood.

753
00:38:24.880 --> 00:38:27.559
<v Speaker 2>Too many of us get lazy and complacent, and we

754
00:38:27.679 --> 00:38:30.199
<v Speaker 2>forget what it's like to have a blood stirred.

755
00:38:31.320 --> 00:38:33.960
<v Speaker 1>And that's our gasoline. Man. You can't just let it

756
00:38:34.000 --> 00:38:35.800
<v Speaker 1>sit there in the tank. You gotta read the engine

757
00:38:35.840 --> 00:38:37.920
<v Speaker 1>sometimes on.

758
00:38:38.719 --> 00:38:42.679
<v Speaker 2>One of his best passages is not a poem, but

759
00:38:42.719 --> 00:38:44.840
<v Speaker 2>a passage in his book that says, the only people

760
00:38:44.840 --> 00:38:47.360
<v Speaker 2>for me are the mad ones, the ones who are

761
00:38:47.400 --> 00:38:50.559
<v Speaker 2>mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved,

762
00:38:50.920 --> 00:38:54.159
<v Speaker 2>desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who

763
00:38:54.239 --> 00:38:58.920
<v Speaker 2>never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn,

764
00:38:59.119 --> 00:39:03.760
<v Speaker 2>like a fabulous yellow Roman candle, exploding like spiders across

765
00:39:03.800 --> 00:39:07.039
<v Speaker 2>the stars, and in the middle you see the blue center.

766
00:39:06.800 --> 00:39:08.960
<v Speaker 1>Light pop and everybody goes ah.

767
00:39:10.599 --> 00:39:13.400
<v Speaker 2>So that's what I mean by let it go. Get

768
00:39:13.480 --> 00:39:16.039
<v Speaker 2>rid of your worries for a day or two. The bullshit,

769
00:39:16.159 --> 00:39:20.719
<v Speaker 2>meaningless little fees you have that ordinarily don't come true.

770
00:39:20.880 --> 00:39:23.559
<v Speaker 1>We're just always scared they're gonna come true.

771
00:39:23.800 --> 00:39:26.079
<v Speaker 2>We've all faced so many battles, but you know what,

772
00:39:26.079 --> 00:39:27.000
<v Speaker 2>we're still here.

773
00:39:27.400 --> 00:39:30.039
<v Speaker 1>So the battles didn't beat us. We beat the battles.

774
00:39:30.760 --> 00:39:31.400
<v Speaker 1>Live like that.

775
00:39:32.800 --> 00:39:36.559
<v Speaker 2>Get the fucking anchor off your back, put all that

776
00:39:37.280 --> 00:39:41.920
<v Speaker 2>bullshit pulsing in you, and just light it up on

777
00:39:41.960 --> 00:39:42.400
<v Speaker 2>fire man.

778
00:39:42.519 --> 00:39:44.480
<v Speaker 1>Just watch the smoke curl up with the sky. Just

779
00:39:44.559 --> 00:39:45.719
<v Speaker 1>be bold, like.

780
00:39:45.679 --> 00:39:47.679
<v Speaker 2>I always tell you, guys, we only got a few

781
00:39:47.679 --> 00:39:51.480
<v Speaker 2>breaths here, We only got a finite time on this earth.

782
00:39:52.119 --> 00:39:55.760
<v Speaker 2>So sometimes you gotta disregube your fears and inhibitions and

783
00:39:56.440 --> 00:39:59.519
<v Speaker 2>just jump straight in, feet first, head first.

784
00:39:59.400 --> 00:39:59.960
<v Speaker 1>Belly flop.

785
00:40:00.079 --> 00:40:03.679
<v Speaker 2>I don't care, jump in, get in, forget yourself, forget

786
00:40:03.679 --> 00:40:06.320
<v Speaker 2>the rules, forget the fucking clock on the wall. We

787
00:40:06.400 --> 00:40:10.519
<v Speaker 2>are all just a flicker in the great wild rush

788
00:40:10.559 --> 00:40:15.280
<v Speaker 2>of time. So throw it all in the fire, heart

789
00:40:15.519 --> 00:40:18.639
<v Speaker 2>head bones, every ounce of your spirit, watch it burn,

790
00:40:19.360 --> 00:40:23.800
<v Speaker 2>because Jack Kirouac said at one point it all ends

791
00:40:23.840 --> 00:40:25.079
<v Speaker 2>in tears anyway.

792
00:40:26.840 --> 00:40:29.360
<v Speaker 1>That's tough. So yeah, like I.

793
00:40:29.320 --> 00:40:32.000
<v Speaker 2>Said, taping this on March twelfth, the day he was

794
00:40:32.039 --> 00:40:34.840
<v Speaker 2>born in nineteen twenty two and Lowell, Massachusetts before he

795
00:40:35.960 --> 00:40:39.320
<v Speaker 2>just raised as much hell as he could and went

796
00:40:39.360 --> 00:40:42.239
<v Speaker 2>on to produce more beautiful words that go good together

797
00:40:42.280 --> 00:40:45.599
<v Speaker 2>to the next twenty offors combined. The guy went for

798
00:40:45.719 --> 00:40:49.039
<v Speaker 2>just forty seven years before he died in nineteen sixty nine,

799
00:40:49.599 --> 00:40:51.840
<v Speaker 2>and he's got a lasting legacy like very few of

800
00:40:51.880 --> 00:40:54.199
<v Speaker 2>the people. So the next time you listened to Bob Dylan,

801
00:40:54.360 --> 00:40:57.559
<v Speaker 2>or or the Beatles or even the Doors, you gotta

802
00:40:57.599 --> 00:41:01.239
<v Speaker 2>remember that he was their hero. They wanted to be

803
00:41:01.360 --> 00:41:05.639
<v Speaker 2>like him. And as a kid who always wanted to

804
00:41:05.639 --> 00:41:09.719
<v Speaker 2>play with the power of words, I always felt, this

805
00:41:10.119 --> 00:41:10.719
<v Speaker 2>guy's the best.

806
00:41:10.760 --> 00:41:12.119
<v Speaker 1>This guy's one of the best.

807
00:41:12.400 --> 00:41:14.800
<v Speaker 2>He got me when I was young, and as many

808
00:41:14.880 --> 00:41:17.280
<v Speaker 2>of you know, I have a roster of heroes in

809
00:41:17.280 --> 00:41:20.400
<v Speaker 2>my heart that goes from Pete Hamill to Jimmy Breslin,

810
00:41:20.400 --> 00:41:23.920
<v Speaker 2>to Muhammad Ali, to Dylan Thomas to Tennessee Williams.

811
00:41:24.000 --> 00:41:25.280
<v Speaker 1>Salinger, Kiroak.

812
00:41:26.360 --> 00:41:29.800
<v Speaker 2>I grew up wanting to be those guys, or at

813
00:41:29.840 --> 00:41:31.719
<v Speaker 2>least in my time on this earth, be able to

814
00:41:31.760 --> 00:41:34.840
<v Speaker 2>do something that maybe cast me in that same light.

815
00:41:35.880 --> 00:41:40.239
<v Speaker 2>I know it's a very high order, but what's the use.

816
00:41:41.239 --> 00:41:43.280
<v Speaker 2>What's the use in living if you don't set your

817
00:41:43.320 --> 00:41:48.519
<v Speaker 2>sights above and beyond yourself. You know, there are faces

818
00:41:49.199 --> 00:41:52.159
<v Speaker 2>of people I see when I write, and they flash

819
00:41:52.199 --> 00:41:55.159
<v Speaker 2>across the backs of my eyelids, like an old sixteen

820
00:41:55.239 --> 00:41:58.960
<v Speaker 2>millimeter film strip, like I saw my family in Brooklyn

821
00:41:59.039 --> 00:42:04.360
<v Speaker 2>back in the sixties. It's almost as if these people

822
00:42:04.440 --> 00:42:07.519
<v Speaker 2>who flash across, these men who flash across my minds,

823
00:42:07.880 --> 00:42:10.440
<v Speaker 2>I'm not only seeking their advice, It's almost like I

824
00:42:10.519 --> 00:42:14.480
<v Speaker 2>want their approval. And then there are times that I

825
00:42:14.599 --> 00:42:17.679
<v Speaker 2>do things and say things and write things that I'm

826
00:42:17.760 --> 00:42:20.960
<v Speaker 2>sure wouldn't meet their standards, and it fucking bothers me. Man,

827
00:42:21.039 --> 00:42:22.480
<v Speaker 2>it just bothers me. I get up and that it

828
00:42:22.519 --> 00:42:24.559
<v Speaker 2>doesn't keep me up, but it wakes me up early,

829
00:42:24.639 --> 00:42:28.360
<v Speaker 2>sometimes at a god for saken hour, three o'clock in

830
00:42:28.360 --> 00:42:33.239
<v Speaker 2>the morning, and I'm up, why stewing in my bad

831
00:42:33.280 --> 00:42:38.239
<v Speaker 2>decisions and misdeeds, just going over life. Those guys wake

832
00:42:38.320 --> 00:42:41.280
<v Speaker 2>me up, I know they do. And I've always had

833
00:42:41.360 --> 00:42:43.519
<v Speaker 2>this desire to be close to them. I got to

834
00:42:43.599 --> 00:42:46.920
<v Speaker 2>work with Pete Haddele and Jimmy Bresden talk about reaching

835
00:42:46.960 --> 00:42:49.039
<v Speaker 2>for things that were well beyond my reach, but I

836
00:42:49.119 --> 00:42:52.559
<v Speaker 2>got them. I don't care they fired me. That makes

837
00:42:52.559 --> 00:42:55.719
<v Speaker 2>the story better, man. But to be near them in

838
00:42:55.760 --> 00:42:58.360
<v Speaker 2>a spiritual way is just I cannot split how great

839
00:42:58.400 --> 00:43:02.159
<v Speaker 2>that feels, you know, just to want to know what

840
00:43:02.280 --> 00:43:04.440
<v Speaker 2>they felt when the world was theirs.

841
00:43:05.519 --> 00:43:08.000
<v Speaker 1>And as morbid as it sounds, I'm gonna say it anyway.

842
00:43:08.960 --> 00:43:12.159
<v Speaker 2>There was that day a couple of Novembers ago, when

843
00:43:12.159 --> 00:43:16.159
<v Speaker 2>I found myself thrown up black blood. Never saw a

844
00:43:16.239 --> 00:43:18.840
<v Speaker 2>black come out of my mouth. That's blood. I didn't

845
00:43:18.840 --> 00:43:22.480
<v Speaker 2>know that. Had to go to the emergency room, have

846
00:43:22.599 --> 00:43:25.440
<v Speaker 2>somebody fix me, to bring me back from the brink.

847
00:43:25.559 --> 00:43:27.760
<v Speaker 1>It was bad. Curtains were closing, man.

848
00:43:28.920 --> 00:43:32.400
<v Speaker 2>Apparently they found that an ulcer in my stomach had burst,

849
00:43:32.440 --> 00:43:35.679
<v Speaker 2>and I was in dire need of help. And yet,

850
00:43:36.559 --> 00:43:40.559
<v Speaker 2>as awful and scary as that time was, i'd be

851
00:43:40.840 --> 00:43:43.400
<v Speaker 2>lying to you guys if I said I didn't briefly

852
00:43:43.519 --> 00:43:47.360
<v Speaker 2>think that maybe I'd gotten too close to Jack Kurouac's

853
00:43:47.400 --> 00:43:50.800
<v Speaker 2>way of life. Since his manner of death was from

854
00:43:50.800 --> 00:43:54.000
<v Speaker 2>an abdominal hemorrhage caused by a lifetime of heavy drinking,

855
00:43:54.559 --> 00:43:57.320
<v Speaker 2>and that was a little too close for me.

856
00:43:58.639 --> 00:43:59.559
<v Speaker 1>I've told you to pass.

857
00:43:59.599 --> 00:44:02.280
<v Speaker 2>It's not always fun to beetry heroes, but it can

858
00:44:02.360 --> 00:44:05.840
<v Speaker 2>be disastrous if you want to be just like them.

859
00:44:06.119 --> 00:44:09.199
<v Speaker 2>So you can still live your life in the spirit

860
00:44:09.599 --> 00:44:12.679
<v Speaker 2>that Kirouac wrote about, but just don't pour any spirits

861
00:44:13.159 --> 00:44:14.480
<v Speaker 2>as you set out to do.

862
00:44:14.679 --> 00:44:19.119
<v Speaker 1>Just that. Have some fun on Jack. I'll talk to

863
00:44:19.119 --> 00:44:19.840
<v Speaker 1>you guys tomorrow