Speaker 1: Weird Way Media Nike.
Speaker 2: Mister Walders, you see that guy with.
Speaker 1: It now, he's an actor. I'm a camp driver. I'm
Speaker 1: the only camp driver in his place.
Speaker 2: Good evening and welcome tonight, mister Walters. A taxi podcast,
Speaker 2: I'm HP. You're co hosted with me, as always is
Speaker 2: my co host, Father Malone. Father Malone, how are you
Speaker 2: this evening?
Speaker 1: Hey, Yellow paper townels. In this episode, it's very unusual.
Speaker 2: We are talking Taxi season three, episode six, the ten
Speaker 2: Percent Solution. This is written by Pat Ali and directed
Speaker 2: by James Barrows. Of course, a reminder we're doing these
Speaker 2: shows in broadcast order and not in order filming occasionally,
Speaker 2: Father Malone. Let me let me preface. Let me start
Speaker 2: by saying, we occasionally get an email from our listeners,
Speaker 2: and I wanted to give a shout out to one
Speaker 2: such listener this episode. This goes out to Maryanne. Hello Marianne.
Speaker 2: Apparently she spent part of this past winter Father Malone
Speaker 2: going through Taxi season by season, kind of binging it
Speaker 2: as one does, and now she found her way to
Speaker 2: this podcast and she's very happy so far. So thanks Marianne.
Speaker 2: Keep listening.
Speaker 1: Hello, Hello mari Anne, It's time that we began let
Speaker 1: her call in everybody. No, thank you for listening obviously,
Speaker 1: thank you for reaching.
Speaker 2: Out absolutely, and as always, folks, please feel free to
Speaker 2: write us at Hpmusicplace at gmail dot com. If you
Speaker 2: have any questions, comments, concerns, want to tell me the
Speaker 2: show is shite or it's awesome, please feel free anyway.
Speaker 2: We open this episode in the garage alone, Jeff.
Speaker 1: And no, we didn't. We started with b roll baby.
Speaker 1: In fact, we had a skyscraper freeze for no good reason,
Speaker 1: a freeze, so doing a lot of that this season.
Speaker 1: And then then we got to almost like a taxi
Speaker 1: driver like shot of the cab, like slowly, you know,
Speaker 1: filling the whole frame and then wiping past, and it's
Speaker 1: a grimy cab and it's a grimy night beyond. I
Speaker 1: loved it.
Speaker 2: It's harder for me to notice when these b roll
Speaker 2: pieces are new and when they're reused, because many times
Speaker 2: I've said, oh, we opened there's this great b roll
Speaker 2: and you would just kind of say, yeah, we saw
Speaker 2: that about five episodes ago, so it's no big shakes,
Speaker 2: so that's cool. I tend to gloss over them, but
Speaker 2: I'm glad that you you made note of that. That
Speaker 2: sounds cool. After this interesting bike oleesque b roll we
Speaker 2: opened in the garage, Jeff and uh oh, hey, Jeff,
Speaker 2: Jeff's back. Everybody cohort. I love it. They're in their
Speaker 2: customary positions. In the cage, Jeff warns Louis. Cockroach at
Speaker 2: ten o'clock.
Speaker 1: So the cockroach battle here we go.
Speaker 2: The cockroaches back. This will not be the last time
Speaker 2: we hear about the cockroach in the cage. Louis has
Speaker 2: taken aback. He exclaims, that's a man eater. Louis tries
Speaker 2: to whack the cockroach with a newspaper, but almost immediately
Speaker 2: he and Jeff recoil At the cockroaches reaction, Louis says,
Speaker 2: did you see that? I hit him with everything I
Speaker 2: had and he just smiled at me.
Speaker 1: You know, New York roaches. It was a joke. New
Speaker 1: York roaches. New York rats couldn't you couldn't tangle with them.
Speaker 1: They would fuck with you.
Speaker 2: You don't hear so much. Yeah, nowadays it's more about
Speaker 2: bedbugs than roaches. Or occasionally you hear about rats, but
Speaker 2: not so much roaches.
Speaker 1: Maybe maybe we've got the roach situation under control. Or
Speaker 1: maybe they've gone further underground and are just plotting their revenge.
Speaker 2: Perhaps they've evolved and now they're actually they've morphed into
Speaker 2: people outwardly look at like humans. Now they've reached the
Speaker 2: next step in the revolutionary process.
Speaker 1: Father Malone, takeover, right now, I'm with you.
Speaker 2: You're declaring fealty to our cockroach overlords.
Speaker 1: I have ad it. Baby, I'll give you some sugar
Speaker 1: or whatever the fuck you guys eat.
Speaker 2: That is a men in black callback right there, Edgar, Oh, yeah,
Speaker 2: he wanted the sugar water. After some more bumbling around,
Speaker 2: Louis proclaims that the cockroach is gone. But then what
Speaker 2: I like is Jeff ominously in tones. But he'll be back, and.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Jeff gets the laugh, he gets the line.
Speaker 2: Here he does, and again, true to form, he's absolutely correct.
Speaker 2: We're gonna see that cockroach pop up again in a
Speaker 2: future episode. We cut to the garage payphone. Bobby is
Speaker 2: nervously pacing back and forth in front of it. Oh oh,
Speaker 2: Father Malone, I sense a job, an acting gig is
Speaker 2: on the line.
Speaker 1: It has to be right, because he's pacing they the
Speaker 1: fucking payphone, you know, Bobby styling. It's the hair. It's
Speaker 1: a problem. And then he has this shirt. It's not
Speaker 1: a button down shirt. It's a halfway button down shirt.
Speaker 1: You can unbutton it from the collar the neck basically
Speaker 1: down to the nipples, which he has done so at
Speaker 1: least we get a splash of old Wheeler here, but
Speaker 1: everything else is gross.
Speaker 2: The shirt is very blousy. It's like a silky material.
Speaker 1: He looks like he's going to a He's waiting for
Speaker 1: Pirates of Penzance callback.
Speaker 2: It's a pirate shirt, years before Seinfeld would popularize the notion.
Speaker 2: He's pacing in front of this payphone. Jim casually walks over,
Speaker 2: prompting Bobby to tell him, Hey, he's waiting on a call.
Speaker 2: Could he make this call? Short side note, by the way,
Speaker 2: before I get to the punchline of this, there's a
Speaker 2: great shot. I don't know if you noticed this father alone,
Speaker 2: but there's a great shot of the graffiti on the
Speaker 2: cement pole because it's an angle that we don't often get.
Speaker 2: It's sort of zoomed in so that the pole is
Speaker 2: taking up about a third of the real estate on
Speaker 2: the screen, so you get a good look at the graffiti.
Speaker 2: Did you see the graffiti, Father Malone, did you read
Speaker 2: any of it?
Speaker 1: Thank god? I was distracted in the background. What did
Speaker 1: it say?
Speaker 2: Amongst the graffiti? I see a date seven six. I
Speaker 2: don't know.
Speaker 1: It's somebody's birthday, obviously.
Speaker 2: Someone on the crew, maybe like someone's birthday. The name
Speaker 2: Smitty is on the pole.
Speaker 1: Well, that's funny, it is.
Speaker 2: And then right next to that it says Louis is
Speaker 2: a jerk, which is to be distracted. It's true.
Speaker 1: That's nobody drew that graffiti. By the way, the building
Speaker 1: actually just spontaneously brought that forth.
Speaker 2: Like an Amityville horror situation where yeah.
Speaker 1: Like in that like the Haunting with you know, tell
Speaker 1: eleanor to come home.
Speaker 2: Good call. I love that the viewer would almost never
Speaker 2: see any of this detail, really never, because this is
Speaker 2: the first time I've even gotten a good look at it,
Speaker 2: and it's probably just because I'm watching a DVD, So
Speaker 2: I assume that the actual viewers at the time would
Speaker 2: never see it this clearly. But the details there. It's
Speaker 2: there if you look for it, but clearly it's there
Speaker 2: to give the actors on set a little more texture,
Speaker 2: a little more detail, make them feel like they're actually
Speaker 2: in a garage. I think that's I thought that was awesome.
Speaker 2: I love when they do stuff like that.
Speaker 1: It's texture in detail for us as well, like even
Speaker 1: if we're not reading any of that stuff, or we're
Speaker 1: aware that it's there and it would be there, so
Speaker 1: it just sort of reinforces the very similitude.
Speaker 2: It's true. And they even I remember there's all sorts
Speaker 2: of stuff in the cheers bar, pictures and things all
Speaker 2: hung around that you would as a viewer, you can't
Speaker 2: fixate on them, but they're there. It's just kind of
Speaker 2: neat that they create this. The verse similitude of this,
Speaker 2: I thought it's pretty marvelous. Jim agrees to keep it short,
Speaker 2: but he ends up confused because the joke is he
Speaker 2: was actually on his way to the bathroom and not
Speaker 2: making a call at all. But he does tell Bobby
Speaker 2: he's going to keep his bathroom break short too.
Speaker 1: While Jim and Bobby are having their conversation, what was
Speaker 1: distracting me, why I couldn't pay attention to the column
Speaker 1: at all, was the the other mechanic when Laka's not around.
Speaker 1: There are several day mechanics. We only ever featured one
Speaker 1: in a plot line. But they're always there. So there's
Speaker 1: a rather older gentleman back there, and he's in coveralls
Speaker 1: and he has on what can best be described as
Speaker 1: a tom of Finland.
Speaker 2: Leather boy did not Again, I did not notice this.
Speaker 2: It's funny the things that I noticed sometimes the things
Speaker 2: that you notice sometimes they often never overlap, which I
Speaker 2: think makes this pretty dynamic, these reviews. But I'll have
Speaker 2: to look for it now. I'll look for the leather
Speaker 2: boy in the past for.
Speaker 1: You that you never noticed the leather boy in the background.
Speaker 1: And I did what color handkerchief? Would that be? Just
Speaker 1: a leather one? I guess right in like the back pocket,
Speaker 1: I remember that, remember cruising cruising, color coating and the handkerchiefs.
Speaker 2: I could not tell you what any of the colors mean.
Speaker 1: And you know what yellow means. Just think about it?
Speaker 2: Do I have to think about it? Stop Elaine looking
Speaker 2: resplendent and a maroon blouse with gray slacks.
Speaker 1: It was a Gingham. It was tiny, tiny gingham. Oh okay,
Speaker 1: look great.
Speaker 2: She looked great. She asks Tony, what's with Bobby on
Speaker 2: the phone, like she's never seen him do this? She's
Speaker 2: probably seen him do this hundreds of times. This pacing,
Speaker 2: this nervous energy about getting a job. Anyway, Tony replies
Speaker 2: what we already know as viewers, that Bobby's waiting to
Speaker 2: hear back about the movie that he auditioned for. Worried,
Speaker 2: Bobby comes over and tells them that it's between him,
Speaker 2: him and one other guy, and he's really nervous.
Speaker 1: I'm both damn pretty boy.
Speaker 2: Both Alex and Elaine sort of fumble uncharacteristically. I have
Speaker 2: to say, they fumble over themselves trying to buck up
Speaker 2: Bobby a little bit and give him some confidence. But
Speaker 2: I guess maybe the idea is even they realize how
Speaker 2: feudile this whole exercise is, that he's probably not going
Speaker 2: to get the part.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I guess if there are any two people in
Speaker 1: the garage going to do that to those two. So
Speaker 1: it makes sense. But at the same time, this is
Speaker 1: not new. This is not the first time on tanks,
Speaker 1: so he's been waiting by the fucking fund. But by
Speaker 1: the way, why is he giving the payphone number, give
Speaker 1: Louie's number and have a pocket full of ones.
Speaker 2: No, he can't give Louis number because it'll it'll be
Speaker 2: disastrous if he's not in the garage when Louis it's
Speaker 2: it's not even about having to give Louis a buck.
Speaker 2: If Louie is feeling saucy that day, he's going to
Speaker 2: ruin that opportunity for no good reason.
Speaker 1: Hey, I have an idea. Perhaps he should use his
Speaker 1: telephone service, you know, the one that Angela Matusa is
Speaker 1: that see?
Speaker 2: I have an answer for that too.
Speaker 1: My guest answer Vaudeville.
Speaker 2: No, I think he probably can't afford that answering service
Speaker 2: anymore because he's obviously he's no, he's not getting many
Speaker 2: jobs now, he's getting no more jobs than he was.
Speaker 2: How can he afford an answering service. Bobby goes back
Speaker 2: over to his post guarding the phone, and Laca is
Speaker 2: now on the phone talking on it, which freaks out Bobby.
Speaker 2: Bobby implores Loatka that he's waiting on an important call.
Speaker 2: Laca says his call is important too. He's ordering lunch
Speaker 2: from a restaurant, Father Malone, that serves food from his country.
Speaker 2: On the side note, isn't it maddening to you that
Speaker 2: we're three seasons in and they still have not given
Speaker 2: Loatka's home country a name. Father alone? Doesn't this drive
Speaker 2: you crazy, No.
Speaker 1: I disagree with you, and I bet that it was
Speaker 1: sort of contingent in confidence contract that they never get
Speaker 1: to name it. Remember he's foreign guy or foreign man.
Speaker 2: But I can see he wouldn't give the country a
Speaker 2: name there because it's just the silly premise for a
Speaker 2: nightclub act. This is three seasons worth of material that
Speaker 2: we're now dealing with. Anyway, I found it a little
Speaker 2: bit vexing, but maybe I'm maybe I'm the outlier. Anyway,
Speaker 2: Laka proceeds to run through this whole long litany of
Speaker 2: ordering the food on the phone in his in his
Speaker 2: native language, and it's just driving Bobby crazy. Bobby is
Speaker 2: seething in the background because he's just taking so long,
Speaker 2: and Bobby finally says, can you make it faster? Loaka
Speaker 2: Loca says, all right, just give me the number seven.
Speaker 2: But this is after he's ordered like five or six
Speaker 2: things extra.
Speaker 1: Yeah, this is what I'm saying. Loca knows what he's
Speaker 1: doing sometimes, Sarah Man a.
Speaker 2: Little darkness here, because he could have just ordered the
Speaker 2: number seven at the beginning. But I think he's doing
Speaker 2: it just to fuck with Bobby a little bit.
Speaker 1: Remember what he was saying. He does to bisexuals. We're
Speaker 1: getting a whole new side of lock in season three.
Speaker 2: That's right, the one with with Tony, the Elaine's.
Speaker 1: Triangle, that's right, that was a recent one. That was
Speaker 1: he's really emerging from the darkness here.
Speaker 2: Bobby gets the call, and through just his side of
Speaker 2: the conversation, you can just hear that the other guy
Speaker 2: got beat him out for the part, and he goes
Speaker 2: over he's talking to the other caves about it. The
Speaker 2: part that really gets to Bobby, that really burns him up,
Speaker 2: is that this other guy has no experience and not
Speaker 2: much talent, but he got the part because of his looks.
Speaker 2: He wasn't better looking than Bobby. Let me make that clear.
Speaker 2: He just had the right quote unquote right look. According
Speaker 2: to Bobby, casting goes in cycles, and the common look.
Speaker 1: Is in right now, so common look, that's good.
Speaker 2: Common according to Bobby. I mean, you have to understand,
Speaker 2: Bobby is a narcissist, so anything that's not his idealized
Speaker 2: perfect visage is going to be labeled as common. But
Speaker 2: as Bobby describes the current look, we see that he's
Speaker 2: basically describing Tony. As he's describing all these features Tony
Speaker 2: is just behind him, rather humorously pantomiming everything that Bobby
Speaker 2: is describing. You know, he's got kind of a smile
Speaker 2: and dumb look whatever. Bobby looks over at Tony confirms that, yeah,
Speaker 2: this is the look they're looking for. Tony is the
Speaker 2: look that they're hiring for these days.
Speaker 1: First of all, Tony is better looking than Bobby. So
Speaker 1: if the criteria isn't a better looking guy just to
Speaker 1: type that they're happening be looking for, then he's wrong.
Speaker 2: This sends Bobby into one of his patented I'm through
Speaker 2: being an actor tirades.
Speaker 1: Right, We've seen this how many times enough?
Speaker 2: Bobby jesus this performative gesture that he makes in front
Speaker 2: of Louis and the Cabby's and the whole garage, like
Speaker 2: it's too much I have. I'm quitting. It's enough, Bobby,
Speaker 2: We get it. We cut away. We actually cut to
Speaker 2: b roll of Bobby's awesome basement apartment again, which you
Speaker 2: and I have been enamored of for some time. We
Speaker 2: cut inside as Bobby is sitting lost in his thoughts
Speaker 2: while Tony runs down the steps. We see him in
Speaker 2: the window running down the steps to the apartment. He
Speaker 2: comes in bearing beer and fudgeticles nice, which for me,
Speaker 2: it kind of gave me Laverne and Shirley vibes a
Speaker 2: little bit, Father Malone. You remember when times were tough
Speaker 2: and the girl Milk and Pepsy hit the spot. Beer
Speaker 2: in fudgetacles just seems it actually is kind of endearing
Speaker 2: that that's their thing, right, And of course Tony is now.
Speaker 2: I don't know that we've seen him wearing this too much,
Speaker 2: but he's wearing his patented New York Yankees jackets his uniform.
Speaker 2: Now he's trying to cheer up Bobby. Basically, he's bringing
Speaker 2: him these things, the beer and the fudgetables. Bobby doesn't
Speaker 2: feel much like talking, but Tony asks Bobby earnestly if
Speaker 2: he can teach him to be an actor, because he
Speaker 2: reasons that he's got the look that act the casting
Speaker 2: agents are looking for. Kind of makes sense when an
Speaker 2: incredulous Bobby asks Tony if he even knows what acting
Speaker 2: is like, Tony says, he was in a grade school
Speaker 2: production of Rip van Winkle. He played the guy who
Speaker 2: woke up Rip, and he comes back to it a
Speaker 2: few times, like wake up, Rip, wake up. This is
Speaker 2: evidence of his acting, Chops which drives Bobby crazy.
Speaker 1: Of course. Nevertheless, from the moment that Tony started puffing
Speaker 1: up in the background back at the garage, I got
Speaker 1: excited because it's a Tony Bobby episode. Tony Bobby episodes
Speaker 1: are usually fucking winners. So by the time we get
Speaker 1: here and now here's the setup, Oh my god, how
Speaker 1: delirious Bobby has to manage Tony and puppeteer him into
Speaker 1: a career in acting. Sign me up.
Speaker 2: The Bobby Tony episodes are usually pretty good, aren't they.
Speaker 1: Yeah. I love their friendship. I wish we spent more
Speaker 1: time with it. I wish we spent more more time
Speaker 1: with them without plot getting in the way. Like I
Speaker 1: wouldn't say no to a hangout episode with those two guys.
Speaker 2: There is a fun dynamic between the two of them
Speaker 2: because they are so different, but there are such good friends.
Speaker 2: Even though we all know that Bobby tends to be
Speaker 2: kind of a dick to Tony, but that's all part
Speaker 2: of the dynamic and we all accept that. So yeah,
Speaker 2: I agree. I was kind of excited for this too,
Speaker 2: because we don't it's very rare. We don't get these
Speaker 2: kinds of stories that off.
Speaker 1: Then and you know, pit with their friendship right here,
Speaker 1: and Bobby says, like, you know, you got to wipe
Speaker 1: your face. You got funch call all over it. And
Speaker 1: then he uses yellow paper towels. It's the weirdest thing.
Speaker 2: Was it a paper towel or was it just a
Speaker 2: kitchen towel?
Speaker 1: No. He grabs a roll of paper towels and brings
Speaker 1: them into frame that are yellow, and then he peels
Speaker 1: off a yellow piece and then hands it to to Tony.
Speaker 2: Paper towels went through a thing for a while where
Speaker 2: I don't know if this is the case anymore, because
Speaker 2: I don't I haven't seen them. But they used to
Speaker 2: have things printed on them. You could get pictures or designs.
Speaker 2: It would look like something in.
Speaker 1: This paper towel is straight from France.
Speaker 2: At some point everybody figured out that all that extra
Speaker 2: ink was doing nobody any favors, at least of all
Speaker 2: the cost of these things. So maybe that's this is
Speaker 2: a throwback to that. I don't know. Bobby keeps trying
Speaker 2: to dissuade Tony about this the folly of becoming an actor,
Speaker 2: but he won't give up. Tony won't give up. He
Speaker 2: reminds Bobby that the guy who Bobby out for the part,
Speaker 2: also had no experience, but he had the look, and
Speaker 2: after a moment or two, Bobby he's swayed by Tony's
Speaker 2: logic for lack of a better word, and he says,
Speaker 2: what the hell, I'll call my agent and I'll set
Speaker 2: it up.
Speaker 1: No, no, no, no, no no. I don't want your agent.
Speaker 1: Listen here, Bobby boy, your agent getting you nowhere. I
Speaker 1: need a better agent.
Speaker 2: I need you, Bobby, Tony says, and on certain terms,
Speaker 2: I don't want your agent because your agent hasn't exactly
Speaker 2: made you, and it was star Bobby. I want you,
Speaker 2: Bobby to be my agent, which is a wonderful vote
Speaker 2: of confidence for Bobby and his skills at being a manager.
Speaker 1: And all the possibilities here HP had they allowed Bobby
Speaker 1: to pursue no longer acting, but theatrical agency, Oh my goodness,
Speaker 1: where we could have gone.
Speaker 2: Tony shares with Bobby this fantasy that he's had since
Speaker 2: he was a kid. He said, he always out like
Speaker 2: he was going to be famous. He always thought Tony
Speaker 2: thought that it was going to be as a boxer.
Speaker 2: But hearing all of this from Bobby makes him think
Speaker 2: that maybe he's destined for fame and fortune as an
Speaker 2: actor and not a boxer.
Speaker 1: He's he's ready for a role in the Rocky horror show,
Speaker 1: some sort of revival off Broadway as Rocky.
Speaker 2: He could be Rocky.
Speaker 1: He could be Rocky. Totally pull that shit off. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he could do that.
Speaker 2: He doesn't. Yeah, it doesn't need to really do much
Speaker 2: of anything, right, No, man, Yeah, I never thought of
Speaker 2: it that way. And I'm sure it was playing in
Speaker 2: Times Square at this time, right, wasn't this for Salpiro
Speaker 2: and everybody that were at this was.
Speaker 1: Like the the cult was born. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's a.
Speaker 2: Good call, good call for Like I said, finally, Bobby
Speaker 2: is convinced he's going to manage Tony. He says, let's
Speaker 2: give it a shot. He pulls a bunch of plays
Speaker 2: off of his shelf for Tony to study. He just
Speaker 2: picks a bunch.
Speaker 1: Of Oh wow, I wish I could have zoomed in
Speaker 1: and gotten them. I mean I did zoom in but
Speaker 1: couldn't get any of them. They name one of them,
Speaker 1: but I don't even know if that's one of the
Speaker 1: books that was in his hand.
Speaker 2: I think he named Long Day's Journey in tonight I
Speaker 2: think there's a monologue there that he said, you have
Speaker 2: to you have to learn that. Might I might, I
Speaker 2: might be wrong about that, but I think that's what
Speaker 2: he said. And they're gonna start tomorrow. Tomorrow is the
Speaker 2: official start of their enterprise. So Tony leaves as we
Speaker 2: fade to commercial. We come back as Louie is entering
Speaker 2: the garage. He's got his jacket on or whatever. It's
Speaker 2: probably this bid. This is what qualifies as the B plot.
Speaker 1: Yeah, this sequence made me tackle as a child.
Speaker 2: Louie is walking very carefully and cautiously to his cage,
Speaker 2: and Land is watching him with glee, I would say,
Speaker 2: watching him as he nervously is looking around the cage
Speaker 2: for this cockroach that's been plaguing him and just to
Speaker 2: get under his skin even more. She she well, she
Speaker 2: pokes fun at his worries about what he's doing anyway,
Speaker 2: but then she gives him like a jump scare, like
Speaker 2: she does one of these things.
Speaker 1: It's great, like oh my god, look.
Speaker 2: Over there, and he freaks out, and she is she
Speaker 2: loves his reaction because he does it exactly the way
Speaker 2: she wanted him to do it.
Speaker 1: Elaine would do fucking fantastic in a haunted attraction as
Speaker 1: a scare actor, like she's she's got it. She's also
Speaker 1: acting as the interactive Greek chorus in this episode. She
Speaker 1: just shows up says, what are you doing? Stop doing that?
Speaker 1: All right? Fuck it? Buy so.
Speaker 2: Then the Simpleton Tony comes in to the garage to
Speaker 2: show Alex and Elaine his head shots. But what they
Speaker 2: are they're not actual, professionally taking photos. They're the kind
Speaker 2: of things you get at the carnival.
Speaker 1: The photo photo booth photos.
Speaker 2: The photo booth rolls three poses for fifty cents. Bobby
Speaker 2: comes in and Tony, ever the Simpleton comes over and shows, hey, Bobby,
Speaker 2: look at my look at my head shots, And I actually.
Speaker 1: Really like this.
Speaker 2: Bobby like does I don't think he looks at them.
Speaker 1: He takes, he does not look at them.
Speaker 2: He rips them up right there and not even looking
Speaker 2: at them, not even caring. Bobby says that he's been
Speaker 2: busy that every casting director in New York City has
Speaker 2: Tony's photo on their desk. He's pounding the pavement. He's
Speaker 2: doing what he should do as a manager. He gives
Speaker 2: Tony a scene from Long Day's Journey into Night to practice,
Speaker 2: but he reads the lie.
Speaker 1: Would he give Tony a dummy? Eugene O'Neill give him
Speaker 1: on the waterfront? What the fuck? Bobby?
Speaker 2: Can I just say, I've noticed in this podcast and
Speaker 2: others for them alone, you have a special skill with
Speaker 2: the word dummy. No one uses the word tell me
Speaker 2: has a put down better than you. And I love
Speaker 2: when you describe Tony as a dummy. I don't know why.
Speaker 2: It just makes me laugh.
Speaker 1: It makes me happy. I didn't realize that. Okay, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna be self cancious about it from now.
Speaker 2: It's fantastic. Tony is reading his lines like do you
Speaker 2: remember in the second Rocky movie in Rocky two, where
Speaker 2: he tries to go into doing commercials but he can't read,
Speaker 2: so he gets fired from all the jobs that he gets.
Speaker 2: Tony's reading his lines like Rocky Balboa trying to read
Speaker 2: a deodorant ad in Rocky Too. It's so wooden, it's terrible.
Speaker 2: Alex Slaane and Bobby are all exchanging worried looks about
Speaker 2: what this means for his acting career, such as it
Speaker 2: is Loca shuffles in this. I love this bit. I
Speaker 2: get to say, I'm not going to bury the lead.
Speaker 2: I love this bit with Loaca. This is another one
Speaker 2: where you get a little bit of the darkness of Loaca.
Speaker 2: I think he goes over to Bobby and asks Bobby
Speaker 2: if he could be Loca's agent too, and he It
Speaker 2: really is funny. Loca explains that an Italian director came
Speaker 2: to his country again with this country business. He came
Speaker 2: to Loca's country to film a movie called Here Come
Speaker 2: the Huns and asks Bobby if he wants to see
Speaker 2: his performance, and Bobby kind of winces. As Loaca is
Speaker 2: setting the scene. Basically, there's this preamble that Locker goes
Speaker 2: into where the Huns have decimated everything. All the people
Speaker 2: are gone, They've been destroyed, everything is in ruins, and
Speaker 2: Loacha's character is surveying the destruction. He does that thing
Speaker 2: where he puts his hand over his eyes to shade it,
Speaker 2: like I'm surveying the land right now to see what's
Speaker 2: going on.
Speaker 1: And it's for guests. Quirky, you know, kind of performance
Speaker 1: he would fit well and waiting for gofman here.
Speaker 2: It is so funny. And my favorite part of all
Speaker 2: of this scene is that just as Lacka is going
Speaker 2: to launch into his part. He after he's described the scene,
Speaker 2: he has this buoyant way of saying and it goes
Speaker 2: something like this. After all this build up, Loca's character
Speaker 2: looks around and he just goes he clucks his tongue
Speaker 2: like hmm, Like like like you would do if you
Speaker 2: saw somebody throwing litter on the ground. You think it's
Speaker 2: gonna be this deep emotional scene with you know, ringing
Speaker 2: of hands and crying and shrieking, and it's just plucking
Speaker 2: his tongue. It's really trust me, it's really good. I'm
Speaker 2: not doing it justice. It's really funny. Just after Laka
Speaker 2: does this performance for Bobby, the phone rings. Bobby answers
Speaker 2: the phone. He's flim flamming with the cast with a
Speaker 2: casting director who's getting ready to offer Bobby, make check
Speaker 2: my schedule.
Speaker 1: Let me say always got to He's working with Barbara
Speaker 1: streisand that week and next week it's uh.
Speaker 2: He's trying to make Tony sound like he's this big
Speaker 2: hot shot. He says, well, no, he's got the Fonda
Speaker 2: movie that week, but I think we can fit you in.
Speaker 2: And he gets an audition for Tony and Tony is
Speaker 2: excitedly watching all of this, and then Bobby gets off
Speaker 2: the phone and they're they're both literally jumping for joy.
Speaker 2: This is Tony's first audition, which is pretty good considering
Speaker 2: it's only been one day that he's been at this. Tony, ever,
Speaker 2: the simpleton, doesn't want to hear about the actual audition.
Speaker 2: He wants to hear about the fond of film that
Speaker 2: Bobby was lying about. As we then fade out and
Speaker 2: fade into the casting director's office. For the next scene,
Speaker 2: Tony and Bobby are getting shown into this office to
Speaker 2: meet the producers. And did you notice who one of
Speaker 2: the producers was, Father Malone?
Speaker 1: I did before I say his name. I know why
Speaker 1: Tony gets the role because one of those producers was
Speaker 1: going to commit suicide and Tony Banta stopped him. Good call,
Speaker 1: because that character then and now is played by Ed
Speaker 1: dot Weinberger, one of the original writers on this series
Speaker 1: and one of the producers, one of the creators. Do
Speaker 1: isn't he he was?
Speaker 2: And you're referencing one of the two part episodes from
Speaker 2: from the first season, I believe.
Speaker 1: Where Pales of ca five oh eight or whatever eight
Speaker 1: oh four? May I paint a picture for you? He's
Speaker 1: in a blue button down shirt with white cuffs and
Speaker 1: a white collar, so now you know what kind of
Speaker 1: human this is. And he's wearing sunglasses indoors that are smoky.
Speaker 1: He looks for all that he's perfectly cast. Whoever said
Speaker 1: put him down there made the right call.
Speaker 2: Everything about this scene. We always talk about the set
Speaker 2: designers and how how they do their job well with
Speaker 2: these big, flashy sets. But one of the things I
Speaker 2: like about this is it's this looks exactly like you
Speaker 2: would expect a New York casting directors or producer's office
Speaker 2: to look, because these guys are producers. It's there's just
Speaker 2: something about it. You can see the hallway behind them
Speaker 2: with other actors waiting for their audition. I don't know,
Speaker 2: there's something about it that feels very earthy and real
Speaker 2: to me, including Ed Weinberger as a producer.
Speaker 1: I'm talking the reality up to James Burrows, whose father
Speaker 1: was a Broadway like writer producer, so I'm sure he
Speaker 1: knew this scene a lot.
Speaker 2: The assistant explains that the character that Tony is auditioning
Speaker 2: for is a young New Yorker of Italian descent, eager, innocent,
Speaker 2: and a little slow, basically describing Tony to a tee.
Speaker 2: Bobby is going to play the part of his father
Speaker 2: in this, which you know is going to give him
Speaker 2: the the opportunity to act circles around Tony, right, I
Speaker 2: can see you. You're grimacing there father alone.
Speaker 1: Well, it's very embarrassing, the whole thing, and I don't
Speaker 1: know why they let him continue when he continues the
Speaker 1: obviously they cast him. They end up casting Tony just
Speaker 1: for the look. But you know why he's allowed to
Speaker 1: go on. As long as he goes on. It's kind
Speaker 1: of crazier and is very cringey, but no more out
Speaker 1: of hand in cringey than the other producer's perm. Is
Speaker 1: it Brady Day.
Speaker 2: Here his perm It had that mister goodboe body Richard
Speaker 2: Simmons kind of look to it.
Speaker 1: Yes, exactly, like it's a very loose perm. It's not.
Speaker 1: It's not a Brady tight to the skull with curls. No,
Speaker 1: this is this is almost like I want an afro.
Speaker 2: When you say Brady, you mean Mike Brady from The
Speaker 2: Brady Bunch.
Speaker 1: Yeah, of course, if you're talking about a man having
Speaker 1: a perm, all roads lead to Mike Brady and then
Speaker 1: you can branch off in tributaries from him.
Speaker 2: They dive into this bit of dialogue. Of course, Bobby
Speaker 2: is giving his all with his reading, and he has
Speaker 2: all the heavy lifting to do. Anyway, this like father
Speaker 2: son thing. All Tony's lines are basically monosyllabic replies, yeah, okay,
Speaker 2: that kind of stuff he never has Yeah, no, wait
Speaker 2: really it's it's totally cringey. I know what they're going for,
Speaker 2: but it's a little too over the top. And I
Speaker 2: have to agree with you, father Malone. If if I
Speaker 2: were the producer watching this unfold, it would only take
Speaker 2: me like half of the line from Tony to say,
Speaker 2: you know what, this guy's a big dummy. You can
Speaker 2: barely read, let alone emte. But that's this being a sitcom's.
Speaker 1: Alo that I disagree. I think they were going to
Speaker 1: cast him no matter what, and I think as soon
Speaker 1: as he opened his mouth and they went, oh he
Speaker 1: can he can actually speak, Okay, great, perfect, he's got
Speaker 1: the role, which I think I think in the middle
Speaker 1: of Bobby's thing, they should have They should have stopped him,
Speaker 1: and then they could have played that as we have
Speaker 1: to stop you because you're so great, kind of a
Speaker 1: thing that Bobby assumes. But it's actually just we don't care,
Speaker 1: We just want we want the dummy.
Speaker 2: He's pretty, so you think that the actual line reading
Speaker 2: was just a formality. They already knew within minutes that
Speaker 2: they were going to hire him for this role because
Speaker 2: of his look.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like when you hear people when they meet
Speaker 1: Lauren Michaels and they're like, I don't know what that
Speaker 1: meeting was. It's basically just to find out if you're
Speaker 1: not a gibbering lunatic.
Speaker 2: The reading ends between Tony and Bobby, and Bobby starts
Speaker 2: hustling them out of the room. He's convinced already that
Speaker 2: it was a terrible, terrible reading, but to his surprise,
Speaker 2: the producers instead they asked Tony if he can start tomorrow.
Speaker 2: Bobby is incredulous, completely incredulous they're gonna hire Tony after
Speaker 2: that reading. It should be kind of a moment of
Speaker 2: triumph for him because he he did what he set
Speaker 2: out to do, He got Tony a role. But then
Speaker 2: Bobby's bitterness comes out, this whole acting thing, the fact
Speaker 2: that he quit acting under these circumstances. He launches into
Speaker 2: this tirade against the producers. Basically finally stomping out of
Speaker 2: the office as we fade out. Now we fade back
Speaker 2: in to Bobby's apartment. He's sitting at the table drinking
Speaker 2: a beer again, a little lost in his thoughts. He
Speaker 2: has a lot that is eating a fudgle at that
Speaker 2: moment too, He's still got because Tony would have left
Speaker 2: the box there to make him to cheer him up.
Speaker 1: Right.
Speaker 2: So so Tony comes in again and he and Bobby
Speaker 2: his credit. He apologizes for his outburst in the producer's office.
Speaker 2: He asks Tony, Hey, how is your first day as
Speaker 2: an actor? Tony says, well, he went to Long Island,
Speaker 2: he had a cup of coffee, he watched George she
Speaker 2: Scott eat a jelly donut, and then he was fired.
Speaker 2: The director at the end of the day didn't think
Speaker 2: he was right for the role. Apparently under know in
Speaker 2: certain terms. He was pretty upset that they hired Tony
Speaker 2: at all. Bobby sympathizes and admits that despite how badly
Speaker 2: they both feel about this situation, Bobby is actually glad
Speaker 2: that he was fired. He said. This is where the
Speaker 2: moralizing comes in. He says that Bobby says the director
Speaker 2: was right. Somebody finally stood up for quality. Bobby lays
Speaker 2: this guilt trip on Tony. He says, don't you understand
Speaker 2: people sacrifice food and clothing for acting lessons, living in poverty,
Speaker 2: just to face rejection over and over and over.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, shut up. Let me tell you something.
Speaker 1: The problem here is Bobby. This guy asked him to
Speaker 1: become his manager and asked him before any of that,
Speaker 1: can you show me how to act? So he's failed
Speaker 1: as the guy's manager because he basically torpedoed his fucking audition.
Speaker 1: He didn't teach him how to act at all. All
Speaker 1: he did was use it as a grandstand to try
Speaker 1: and leap over him and get some other fucking roll and.
Speaker 2: A Bobby's the one who has an act to grind
Speaker 2: still in this whole thing. Bobby finishes by saying, the
Speaker 2: director firing Tony is an affirmation of these people's sacrifice
Speaker 2: in his story. Tony's story, Bobby says, will be an
Speaker 2: inspiration to all of Bobby's other loser actor friends, and
Speaker 2: then they share a laughing embrace as we fade the commercial.
Speaker 2: I mean, I guess at the end of the day,
Speaker 2: Tony really doesn't seem to have cared all that much
Speaker 2: about getting fired. I think maybe he realizes that this
Speaker 2: was a little more This is going to be a
Speaker 2: lot more work than he had thought it was going
Speaker 2: to be, So maybe he's to some degree relieved. But
Speaker 2: I'm with you, followable, and I don't like the fact
Speaker 2: that Bobby basically used Tony as an example to prove
Speaker 2: his own superiority, his perceived superiority as an actor. And
Speaker 2: I just have a real problem with that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, So I don't know what the motive was. Was
Speaker 1: that to prove to Tony that he's out of his depth,
Speaker 1: Was that to prove to himself that he could get
Speaker 1: a dummy into a role? Did he use it the
Speaker 1: whole thing just as a gambit to get in the
Speaker 1: room and sell himself over Tony? And if not any
Speaker 1: of those things, he's a terrible friend for not speaking
Speaker 1: plainly with Tony and saying, yes, you can potentially get
Speaker 1: a role because you're pretty and you're dumb, but you
Speaker 1: cannot act. You are going to have a problem.
Speaker 2: The thing of it is, we were talking about all
Speaker 2: of these other Tony and Bobby episodes, and they are
Speaker 2: good episodes, but this is all well within the parameters
Speaker 2: of what goes into those episodes because Bobby has been
Speaker 2: shown time and time again to be a terrible friend
Speaker 2: to Tony, starting with the fact that he killed Tony's
Speaker 2: fish and had them Macobley mounted on the largest plaque
Speaker 2: that he could find. It's gruesome. It's like an easy
Speaker 2: comic come to life. We talked about it. So this
Speaker 2: is all well within character for Bobby. So I'm not
Speaker 2: a bit surprised.
Speaker 1: Well yeah, but again, I'm trying to figure out his
Speaker 1: angle here, because if he wanted to prove to Tony
Speaker 1: that Tony was out of his depth, then he should
Speaker 1: have said, yeah, i'll be your manager, but first go
Speaker 1: talk to my agent, you know, like just do an
Speaker 1: audition for him and see what he has to say,
Speaker 1: because that would have at least given Tony the knowledge
Speaker 1: that he's going to be fired from any job he
Speaker 1: lucks into this.
Speaker 2: Probably a dozen ways that he could have proved to
Speaker 2: Tony without actually telling him right out that you're not good,
Speaker 2: You're not going to be an actor. He could have
Speaker 2: enrolled them in an acting class just so they could
Speaker 2: have been the ones to say, I don't think this
Speaker 2: is going to work out.
Speaker 1: You have no talent, but I want you to come
Speaker 1: to my instructor I take a class. I just want
Speaker 1: you to come to the class with me, and I
Speaker 1: want you to get up and do something and then
Speaker 1: hear the critique and then decide if you want me
Speaker 1: to be your manager or not.
Speaker 2: You're giving all of these possibilities as to what Bobby's
Speaker 2: endgame was possibly going to be, and the only thing
Speaker 2: I can say to all of those possibilities is yes,
Speaker 2: I think any and all of those things were in
Speaker 2: play on this. I think Bobby he's always playing the
Speaker 2: martyr when it comes to acting. This is just another
Speaker 2: way for him to prove to the acting world at large,
Speaker 2: to the industry that fine, you want somebody for their
Speaker 2: look but lack of talent. Here you go. I'm going
Speaker 2: to give you the the guy with the least amount
Speaker 2: of talent that I could find and have at it. Hollywood,
Speaker 2: go for it. Let's see how you like it. You
Speaker 2: know you don't want a guy like me with talent
Speaker 2: and ability and looks then ghost to matter.
Speaker 1: No matter the motive, it's ultimately petty.
Speaker 2: There's something to be said for that, for that laser
Speaker 2: focus on being so petty and proving it. I don't know.
Speaker 2: I guess maybe there's something to be said for that.
Speaker 2: So now we have the resolution of the b plot here.
Speaker 2: This is a little bumper. We don't get enough of
Speaker 2: these bumpers. I don't think we got a lot in
Speaker 2: the first season, not so much second season. We fade
Speaker 2: back in as Louis is making this loud show of
Speaker 2: leaving his cage. All right, everybody, I'm going home. Everybody
Speaker 2: have a good you know. He's obviously putting this on
Speaker 2: for the cockroaches benefit.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, we got a fool of the cockroas that
Speaker 1: it's going to be alone and it should emerge from
Speaker 1: its hiding place.
Speaker 2: So Alex comes down the stairs, probably going home for
Speaker 2: the morning or whatever. He sees Louie emerge with this
Speaker 2: big fishing rod, and he casts the fishing rod into
Speaker 2: the cage. He says, I think he tells Alex that
Speaker 2: he baited it with hamburger. Alex observes all of this,
Speaker 2: and he starts talking to Louie about this crazy scheme
Speaker 2: that he's going to catch the cockroach with the fishing
Speaker 2: What he crazy? Louie And they're having this conversation and
Speaker 2: they're arguing about whether this is going to work or not.
Speaker 2: And as they're arguing, Loui has stood up the fishing
Speaker 2: rod in the corner so that he can talk with
Speaker 2: Alex and kind of gesture with his hands. We see
Speaker 2: the fishing rod start to jerk wildly. He actually has
Speaker 2: a bite on the end of this thing. To their horror,
Speaker 2: they notice this is happening, and he tells Louie. Just
Speaker 2: as Louie grabs the fishing pole and they do this
Speaker 2: great thing. There's obviously somebody in the cage who's been
Speaker 2: pulling on it. The person basically throws the fishing line
Speaker 2: back over to Louis, but there's nothing on the line anymore.
Speaker 2: It's just this empty line that gets that SAgs around.
Speaker 2: They both nervously run out of the garage at this tableau.
Speaker 2: As the credits start to.
Speaker 1: Roll, Blue gills, blue gill right right through that piano ryer.
Speaker 1: Don't you go tell me my business again?
Speaker 2: That is the episode now, as is our custom father Malone,
Speaker 2: We're going to talk yellow lights.
Speaker 1: What does a yellow light mean?
Speaker 2: Reminder one yellow light. This is a scale between one
Speaker 2: and five. One yellow light is the worst taxi episode,
Speaker 2: five is the best taxi episode. And as is also
Speaker 2: our custom, Father Malone, We're going to throw it back
Speaker 2: to you first. What do you give the ten percent solution?
Speaker 1: I give it three yellow lights. I think it's a
Speaker 1: solid middling episode. It's the focus is Bobby and Tony,
Speaker 1: which I'm always interested in. The the jokes are mainly good.
Speaker 1: Everyone's in character here, particularly Bobby. Even if I don't
Speaker 1: like what he's doing, it actually makes sense what he's doing.
Speaker 1: And it's just theris in enough of you know what.
Speaker 1: There is a lot of everybody here, maybe not enough
Speaker 1: of Jim, but it's not that balance. It's not great overall,
Speaker 1: there's nothing really wrong with it. I would I didn't
Speaker 1: object to anything like previous episodes. Just I want to
Speaker 1: give it four for that funky roach Hunt theme, but
Speaker 1: instead I think just three'll do.
Speaker 2: I also gave it three yellow lights, Father Malone. I
Speaker 2: agree with you on many of these points. It's a
Speaker 2: rare Tony Bobby episode. It's pleasant enough to watch. There's
Speaker 2: there's no there's very low stakes, there's some good laughs.
Speaker 2: It's a perfectly average episode of Taxi's not gonna win
Speaker 2: any Emmys, but it's also one that I might recommend,
Speaker 2: you know, it's funny.
Speaker 1: Absolutely, I would I would definitely recommend this episode. Watch
Speaker 1: this episode.
Speaker 2: It's fun, you know, and it's got those weird bits
Speaker 2: with Laca that they don't necessarily add a ton.
Speaker 1: Sinister bit with Laka.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I love that they're they're they're peppering him in
Speaker 2: a little bit more here and there. So that's going
Speaker 2: to do it for this episode of night Mister Walters
Speaker 2: Father Alone. When you're not clocked into the garage, where
Speaker 2: can the find folks find you?
Speaker 1: Well, you can always find me at midnight Viewing. That
Speaker 1: is my podcast. It's mainly a horror anthology podcast where
Speaker 1: we look at tales from the dark Side week every
Speaker 1: other week, but every week you can hear Father Malone's
Speaker 1: weekly round up. That's part of the show. And we
Speaker 1: do anthologies Attack that's another part of the show. And
Speaker 1: then we're doing Fusco Fest right now, HP and I
Speaker 1: are doing Fusco Fest. So far, well, we're working through
Speaker 1: the works of screenwriter John Fusco. So far, we've done Crossroads,
Speaker 1: Young Guns, Young Guns to the Babe, and Thunderheart. Next
Speaker 1: up is going to be Locknest. But go back and
Speaker 1: listen to all of those episodes because they're fucking great.
Speaker 2: Awesome stuff and like Follom alone. You can find me
Speaker 2: also on the Weirdingway Network. I host the Noise Junkies
Speaker 2: music podcast. I'm an occasional guest on The Culture Cast
Speaker 2: with Chris Dashu, and I also have a bandcampsite Hpmusicplace
Speaker 2: dot bandcamp dot com. I got some music up there.
Speaker 2: Please check it out if you will, But thank you
Speaker 2: so much for listening. Please feel free to subscribe to
Speaker 2: this podcast, write a review or rate us. We'd love
Speaker 2: to hear from you. My email address is Hpmusicplace at
Speaker 2: gmail dot com. Please write if you liked, hated, felt good,
Speaker 2: felt bad, whatever your mood is, just drop me a
Speaker 2: line and anyway, thanks again for listening and we'll see
Speaker 2: you guys again next week. Hi,