Speaker 1: Hello Fred here, I just wanted to wish you all
a happy East and good I recommend you all listen
to Domond Jerry while you enjoy your three or four
days off. Whatever housealt Joe you've got to do, stick
the old podcast in your ears while you're at it.
Could be anything pow washing, yard, cleaning your gutters, dropping
a one hundred and forty chimney at ground. Everything is
more enjoyable with Domond Jerry in your ears. Well, I
think so. Anyhow, I'll see they Tom and there.
Speaker 2: I'm out of sorts. I'm all out of sorts. He
caught me on the hop this evening. I'm fresh out
of shower. I'm not wearing any socks or you can't
function properly with no socks on it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a different gravy like if you're a if
you're even a slipper or a thing. I know, I
get it. If you meant to go around the no socks,
you know what I mean, like a summer's day which
I love. Can't get keep socks on that, you know,
full of mind, they are absolutely a waste of mon
mind either. But if I get you, if I'm caught
in the hop and I go, am I on, shoe on,
sock on? What am I doing? If I get it?
I get it? Have you belt on the trousers but there's.
Speaker 2: No belt on tracky bottoms here, Tom, fair enough because
if you were sitting there o'clock at night. But no,
I'll tell you if if, if, if I hand this
podcast over to Tom to carry it for five minutes
while I run off and get a pair of socks,
you know, I'll just be like, I can't fucking stick it.
No for them, I get it.
Speaker 1: I get it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, Hi, everybody, Welcome to
the top and Jerry show. Jesus.
Speaker 2: Yeah, we don't. We don't. We don't go with airs
and graces. I'm Jerry McBride. That's Tom. O'Mahoney wardrobe malfunctions. Tom.
Speaker 1: I had my own at the weekend, and if anybody
follows me on Instagram, I had to come clean about
it because to the point that if it made my
wife actually cry for fifteen minutes and get an asthma
attack from laughing, I figured it was worth just coming
clean and telling the truth. Gover. I won forty five
when I got into the bed Friday night, so that
became twenty nearly twenty three hour day, pretty tired up
the next morning. Up the next morning for early haircuts
with Keelan shut out. He's a great man. Listen to
the podcasts in the barbers in there for half eight
and he'll say, I had to feed more than the
young flow. I'm out with seven The next morning, jar
reaching around in the kind of walking part I don't always.
I don't know what it is. It's a room work,
our clothes are and I didn't turn the light on.
I reached out crab what I thought was a T
shirt of mine. It wasn't as I draw on a
hoodie out the gap. And it wasn't until I had
did this robe inside the barbers that I realized I
was wearing a kind of.
Speaker 2: Slinky number earlier.
Speaker 1: The sleeves, do you know what? It would have been
more masculine had there been no sleeves at all on it, right,
like a wife beater. But it actually had little sleeves,
little girly sleeves that just come off the shoulder. The
neck was quite loose, and it was halfway up my
belly button, and it was it was canary yellow and
inside out Jesus Christ Tom. Yeah, but to be fair, Jar,
when you're did low. The town's local comedian, the barber,
who is also a sound skin, probably up since half six,
himself cut in the hair, he said nothing. He was like, pass,
no remarks, past, no remarks because also it's not like
I'm the local solicitor, do you know what I mean?
But then I get home thinking, then I got to
go straight to Jay training. As you know, I'm at
coach now, mister coach, I'm the angry coach. Even at that,
I'm the bad guy.
Speaker 2: Oh you're you're You're not the cool guy.
Speaker 1: Oh no, I'm not. No, no, oh no. I thought
I would be Jared. That's what I thought my role
would be. And then it turns out I'm actually I
don't know if anybody saw on my Instagram. Also my
wife who came along and knows what my temper is
about to flare up before I do. She came to
football training and no one full well she was in
for retreat, saw me being the rowdy coach. Look and
yung FLEs out of at age six, and while her
and all the mothers roared laugh and she went onto
AI and made a culmination of me and Kim Jong
owned with a Gaelic football and yes, so I came
outside and I came clean. I'd go to train and
keep the hood tightly tied up. And when I came
back home with you never guess what I'm wearing, So
what probably am worried that I was her underwear? I zipped,
unzipped and showed her. And at that point she sped
her coffee all over the fucking the kitchen, fucking counter
and proceeded to get an asthma attack for fifteen minutes
because she left so fucking hard. Even if I may
go out and if I mentioned that or pointed that
T shirt, now that woman is inconsolable for the next
five minutes. It's she enjoyed that much. So anybody go
to my Instagram show watch watch a middle aged man
just come clean with society. It was my open letter
to society that this can happen to even the best
of us. I malfunctioned that.
Speaker 2: I feel so bad now Tom, that i'd and have
time to throw on a pair of the shower and
arrived here to do the Tom and Jerry show. Still
damp for you, find, folks, that's just.
Speaker 1: What you're forgiven from my side anyway, given to carry
on of me over the weekend. It's it's that I
give you the backstory, but still all the same, it's
it's kind of unforgiven to end up in that scenario.
But I think people people enjoyed my fall because they
came to the comedy club and care that night and
at least nine different people started shouting up, what what
T shirt? I was wearing under my shirts?
Speaker 2: Yeah? If I was you, I just rock up wearing
that T shirt?
Speaker 1: Ever, why not? Why not get a whole bunch of
them just for the hell of it? Like, but it did.
It did look like I was ready for fame the musical.
That's all I'll tell you.
Speaker 2: If you want to wonder with the core of young
lads what I wear in the way, not to jump
ahead in the show, but what the young lads are
wearing these days. I wouldn't say you looked out of
place in the fucking slightest.
Speaker 1: Probably probably not, actually now you mention probably yeah, probably
a lot of those likes on Instagram were just people
going nice.
Speaker 2: Nice you. You come back in a week's time, and
to be ten lads are wearing that look what happened
with the mullet.
Speaker 1: You're all laughing at me now, every fucking flinging the
jersey is going wrong with these gabby little half mullets.
Speaker 2: I'm like, yeah, and I'm laughing at them as well. Tom,
come here, we'll rock on with the show.
Speaker 1: You are able the vest, but I appreciate it.
Speaker 2: You didn't win the mullet argument.
Speaker 1: No, no, no, I wanted.
Speaker 2: It was a ship the hothouse flowers heading me. My god, damn,
those were the days.
Speaker 1: You had a great opportunity. And I will say that
you had a great opportunity, but you didn't. You didn't,
you didn't take it. But you went scandas enough, So
that's fine. We better move on with the show.
Speaker 2: Better move on with the show. Folks were gonna kick
off as we do every week, with the big news
the scuttle, but the rock is the weekly what have you.
This is a very complicated case, mad You know, a
lot of a lot of outs, a lot of what
have you, and uh of SCRAMs to keep in my head.
Speaker 1: Man, It's it's rare. I get I get pinned so
much by the amount of times I got sent this
from family members because they were like this is has
dominant number one crime, you know, low level crime level,
no live level crime.
Speaker 2: Murder on the show yet killing the audience I suppose
could Yeah yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 1: I don't know. There's almost no cracking murdering, like do
you know what I mean? There's a bit of crack
and there's a definitely a bit that kind of show.
Definitely a bit of crack in this one because we
we like to see the Europeans just get a bit
of kicking the arts because they're a bit smarmy with
their good weather and all the rest of it. So
and also, I mean, who doesn't like to see a
huge multi national monster haveing They have their wings clipped
ever so slightly. And this is Nestley the guy. The
CEO of ESLE said that this guy came out a
couple of years ago Jared and said water wasn't a
human right, it should be sold by me.
Speaker 2: So from the official Tom and Jerry stands on, Neslie
is fuck Nesley.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, Nesley and shit much like bears a bear
eating at a fucking nesle a shit.
Speaker 2: Well, bears ain't even eating Nesle these days. Tom, what happened?
Speaker 1: So what happened, and I love the way they'd left
it a bit murky. Four hundred, four hundred and thirteen thousand,
seven hundred and ninety three kid cats were fixed Jerry
truck and all went absolutely sends abscondiondo after leaving a
unit in wait for it Italiano and just the low
jack system that was on at the driver's tracker, everything
just disappeared. It was en route to Poland, and I
guess much like you know Second World War story, this
one didn't make it to Poland just.
Speaker 2: Didn't make it. Didn't Irish man just didn't make it.
Speaker 1: Just didn't make it to Poland. And like that, they're
they're looking all sorts. So it was in it came
out like they were saying that. The first people to
spell about it, of course was Agence France Presse, which
are like, you know, liquip on one of these there
because Nesle of course there's a French company. They were like,
we got people this one why it is? And this
came yeah, this came to This came to light because
it reached over twelve that's twelve tons of kit cats here.
Speaker 2: You see, I had gotten the number that it was
twelve tons of kit cats. And I hadn't that hadn't
been broken down to me as to how many bars
it is? How many bars is twelve tons?
Speaker 1: Did you say four hundred and thirteen seven hundred and
ninety three?
Speaker 2: Okay, so now a million kit cats in the wind?
Speaker 1: Yeah, So I mean at we'll say gross price net
price in the shop, let's say two fifty a bar.
These days, I'm guessing you're looking at close to a
million a million euro million to kill kit cats.
Speaker 2: That's a lot to.
Speaker 1: Fit in any rock, Like you know what I mean,
It's not to me, Like.
Speaker 2: You know, I had never not once in my life,
but until I heard this story, had I thought of
how a KitKat gets transported because I've only ever seen
in the in the outer sleeves, you know, like an
outer sleeve of kit cats. And there's like I don't know,
like turkey bars in a in an outer sleeve, and
you see some of them like packed up in the
back of a shop or some such before they get
put out on the on the on the aisles by
the teenagers. You know. Like just to me, I'd never
seen two boxes of kit cats, let alone one hundred
thousand boxes of it. And I've never dawn on me
that Oh yeah, I guess, I suppose, I said to myself,
I guess most graves has ten or fifteen of them
on the shelves. But it's it's boggled in my mind
to think of a lorry full of.
Speaker 1: Kit cats a lorry. Fully you think, yeah, you wouldn't
imagine it all arrive at the one time, because Nestle
is so big. You think because Nesle had a did
a plant in Cork and they used the specialist in me
in Forrero Rash over near Douglas, and one of the
few building sights I've ever been on that you're continuously
hungry because you can all you can smell is for
rail rashe in the air nearby. I've been in many
a place where there's stuff in the air that you
don't want. It would turn you after your fucking your
your breakfast. But so you nearly think that they have
a local spot everywhere making these things thought like, you know,
like cad breeze and coolock or some such like, exactly
one distribution point in Italy. And if it gets absconded, well,
here's then all of a sudden, Poland doesn't have any
kit cats for a year exactly. Now here's the tinger.
They were on the way to Poland, right both they
were a very specific one. So this might be the
one that's only made back back at home base right now.
They the thisn't tell you how the kind of money
could Cat and Nesle have, Like they literally said, while
we appreciate the criminals exceptional taste, the facts are made.
The cargo theft is an escalated issue for businesses of
all sizes, and you're like they had the opportunity to
stick in like they had exceptional taste. Fair play lads.
That's nearly more worrying in a way, isn't it, Because
if a you know, a villain, which let's say Nesley
are because they kind of are, turns around and goes
fair place. Yeah, through that smiling smile, you.
Speaker 2: Could do a lot with it. As a company, you
could turn around and go like, couldn't help. But notice
that there haven't been many Mars bars stolen lately. Yeah
you know, yeah, because if people would taste steel care
you could do something.
Speaker 1: You could and no doubt they probably will. But in
their statement there was like, you know, we quite literally
they have taken a break with twelve tons of our choclate.
But it's the kind of sinister, happy happy that they're
putting out that to me says that somebody's gonna lose fingers.
Speaker 2: You know, it's it's very it's very like lockstock or snatch.
Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah, well done, lads, well done, well done.
Want to me, yes, hope you enjoy those fingers, because
that's a loss for four fucking fingers you're gonna have
in thatt Rock Turkish.
Speaker 2: You snapping those fingers up one at a time. Just
remember a more snapped your fucking fingers off. I can't
do the accents.
Speaker 1: That was close enough. That was close enough for me
on the wager. You see, these were specific one there
were these particular bars because Kit Cat, if nothing else,
there's a kit Cat fucking cereal up in that fucking
cupboard somewhere. I guarantee you there is a new Formula
one line. Now, how it tastes like a formerly one car,
I don't know. But they actually have a chocolate formerly
one car some in Sentil Square in York at the minute,
crafted from chocolate, not plashtic from chocolate. But these were
on the way to be distributed guessing from the big
distribution area, like you said, the most grapes of Poland
and it was too grips. It was the compliment. And
then you then you watch me call it the new
kid caat range was gonna be F one formerly one
inspired and it got me thinking.
Speaker 2: Jer they're sorry, I gotta pull it that one their tom?
How is F one inspired?
Speaker 1: I don't know, Maybe he's gotta point the end. Have
you been down the rabbit hole? That is what KitKat
and Nesley have been at. The fucking nankey bastards they
have thrown do you know, Like you've been in enough
marketing meetings and you talk these things over and things
are spitballed back and forth, and you go, maybe we
could do a Shardonnay and fucking hell cheese, fucking crisp
and go cross. It goes around the table. Maybe put
it out to a market in a market research survey.
No disgusting, kid Cat, don't do that at all.
Speaker 2: They really seem to be a law to themselves.
Speaker 1: They're out of control. Ger when it comes to flavors,
they're absolutely out of control. I'm just gonna shout some
of these flavors at you. Please do and you can
just come up with whatever you think they might be.
There's a running team through this whole thing. That's a
little bit fucking creepy. Right, there's one called Save the
Blue Ocean kit Cat. What does that taste? What does
that taste like? Malted milk? Apparently? Whatever the fuck? Ben
had a caramel kit Cat? Get the fuck out of
my face. No mint and dark chocolate, all right, it's
been done before. Looks rank and wheat biscuit kit cat.
Now this is where we start.
Speaker 2: I say, no, you message the way for it. It's
not a kit cat.
Speaker 1: Hold onto your pants, flann pudding kit cat. Try that one. Advertise, Hm,
the Japanese are wild. Coffee could break kit cat tastes
like fucking coffee, as you can imagine. Here's where the
first round of weirdness comes from. Adult sweetness number one,
kit cat, Give me that again, adult sweetness, adult sweetness,
and that's the flavoreder It's called adult sweetness. Taste of
a sweet adult inside that bar. Moving on, fruity cereal
Kit Cat?
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, that fuck that adult sweetness will tell you that.
Speaker 1: Much right off. Matcha kit Cat.
Speaker 2: I've had a match kit Cat. I think that you
would be there that.
Speaker 1: Can go and see just before I concrete it summer
ice cream kit cat again, a lot of these evasion
writing in the front of them, and I'm just going
to say it tastes like vanilla dunk a use.
Speaker 2: If you know what the vanilla kit cat and it
don't get smarked.
Speaker 1: Pistachio kit cat, which every bastard their mother tried doing
fucking Dubai shite last year. Here we go here adult
sweetness kit cat number two?
Speaker 2: What what what differentiate's number one and number two?
Speaker 1: This one's got a hint of matcha in it. No
sweet thing historically, but okay, yeap cheesecake kit cat.
Speaker 2: Okay, I'm not Yeah, if I was gonna eat a
kick cat maple cat, and then you know, second to that,
I might be cheese kay kit kit.
Speaker 1: Maple Canada, also known as the sorry maple kit cat,
also knows that, oh Canada kidkat, it has no bearing whatsoever.
It's got some Asian writing on it. It's got a
giraffe and a polar bear on the front of it,
because you know they're native to Canada.
Speaker 2: Natives to Canada. Strawberry miss a trick not calling that
just a kit cat Canada. I know, I know, but
then again it'll be a KKK bar, wouldn't it. Which,
by the way you're going on, Tom, that's coming up
now shortly.
Speaker 1: Could be easily All of these are probably dirty names
for sex positions and weird things that people write to
each other in the dark web. Strawberry kit cat Okay,
strawberry milk kit cat because why Adult Sweetness number three, Tom,
I'm gone, We're wrapping the strawberry milk kit cat and
it's just pink and tangy chocolate orange kit cat. All right,
Terry's fair enough, but not get off the truck. Terry's
nailed that back in the day. White chocolate kit cat
absolutely fucking not bar. There you go. That is that
it does look like it's wearing a little hood fairness
and it's got brown inside. That's ironic. Strawberry and dark
chocolate kit cat going to be absolutely disgusting. Here we
go here, Adult Sweetness number three.
Speaker 2: Folks follow us on Instagram, Tom w Els, would we
like these fine people to do? What the fuck is
adult's weakness Number.
Speaker 1: This one's got is solidly strawberry flavored, but wait for
it's fuzzy and mealy mealy Yeah, like an alka Seltzer
got a mankey coating like what bar a meily bar? Yeah,
Like you're feeding pigs mocha and chocolate kit cat mango
KitKat fuck clearly off. I'm gonna I'm gonna actually say
what I think is the rankest of the addam apple
and cinnamon cat cat that can get so far into
the middle of the sea. It tastes it tastes like
perfume apparently, Yeah, yeah, and a perfume you're getting clears
this person is making an honest reading. Then there's mob
Blanc KitKat, which is Maron flavored. That's a hazel lot
of or chestnut of some sort. Chestnuts fucking disgusting and
probably what I'd imagine is the most disgusting of all,
but with a notion of trying to be there for
all the Yorkshire odds.
Speaker 2: It's adult sweetness number four.
Speaker 1: Well technically yeah, it's milk tea kit cat milk tea Yeah, yeah, okay, yeah.
Speaker 2: I mean, like, okay, Tom, do you know we don't
want to get into We remember when straight away, but
kit cats used to be nice and now they are
stink I.
Speaker 1: Was put off kit cats. I like an al kit
cat right in my head, but I was put off
from years ago. Lad, Do you know with different leads
are different kind of habits. It's lead, lad that I
knew used to gnaw off the chocolate like a rat
off on a k on a kit Cat and get
it down to the wafer and then the whole thing.
Speaker 2: And I remember watching I do that on a purple snack.
Speaker 1: I watched him do that. Yeah, when they were teak.
There's no point, but he used to do it. And
I remember watching him the same way a prisoner who
was about to shank somebody. Do you know, like I
watched him when I'm gonna go across the fucking table
of this this school canteen, just shank him with something
and get another twenty five years on my sentence because
the difference. Yeah, yeah, yeah, what does it make to me?
That's the way I looked at it.
Speaker 2: So then for life may as well take if you
buy it.
Speaker 1: If any of those flavors I notice said formerly one
flavored or from formerly one teamed kit cats were effect
if any of them tasted remotely like one to twenty
five disgusting fucking things and if any of them had
a vibe of admiral sweetness of it getting the fucking
see good luck they went missing in Italy. That's all
I know.
Speaker 2: Let me ask you a question, Tom before we move on.
Speaker 1: Go on.
Speaker 2: Do you think the thieves that these kitkats? Do you
think they knew that's what they were stealing? Or was
this a crime of opportunity that they just grabbed a
truck and trove and they were as surprised as anybody
to open it and find millions of kit cats.
Speaker 1: If it was any other country, I'd say it was
a it was a roll of the dice and just
robbed it. But this was where a.
Speaker 2: Crime was invented.
Speaker 1: Crime was invented, Organized crime was invented. You know. It's
costin Astra or cast An, austral or whatever they call it.
Like I don't I'm not saying it was close to
the Sicilian and close to the Sicily or that or Naples,
but I'm just throwing it up there. I I this
was but one hundred one hundred percent And do you
know what they're doing? Do you know what they're probably doing? Hold?
Speaker 2: I have no idea what they're doing. Hold this this
isn't gold. You can't sit in this for five years exactly.
Speaker 1: They I guarantee. What they're doing now is they have
it held held for ransom. They'll take maybe one hundred
thousand to release eight in the truck.
Speaker 2: Just walk away. That's interesting.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's what I That's what I would do. I
just go listen. It's fair, right, there's no point in
going to your insurers for this. I'm going to give
you back the truck and all your kid gets for
one hundred grand. I said, leave it in crypto, and
here's me working for a living time. That's actually very smart.
Thanks man.
Speaker 2: Thanks.
Speaker 1: It's a it's an old move, but it's it's but
it's fair. You don't ask for you don't ask for
the price that the kid gets back. You still wanted
to make some money so that they can you know,
they'll rote out of another one next month.
Speaker 2: Week on the least. Or do you want the Polish
kids to get KitKat? Don't you?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Exactly exactly.
Speaker 1: So it's I think I'm just saying, and I don't
like the stereotype. I absolutely like the stereotype. It was
the Italians, jar.
Speaker 2: It was the Italians. The Italian job with Kitkats ladies and.
Speaker 1: Hanging off the edge of the cliff like I was
supposed to plant the bloody fucking dose off kit cats everywhere.
Speaker 2: Kit Cats, well, folks, there you go. If you manage
to get yourself a kit Kat over the easter, you know,
maybe sell on the black market.
Speaker 1: There's a shortage they have the Oh that's the one
thing I meant to actually say, is that Nestle have
all those barcodes, all of them right, and they'll know
the second one pings and then that's when they're fucking
so the boys camera and the fucking trainsit fucking smash
you up in it. They will they ready for any
of them, So they're assuming they need to be sold
on the That's why I don't think they're going to
be actually sold in any markets around Italy, you know
what I mean. I think it's just going to be
a ransom job truck and all released.
Speaker 2: One k and you want a chopper to the airport,
I want one hundred kit cats with unmarked, nonsequential barcodes.
Fucking right. Okay, we'll move on.
Speaker 1: Tom, big blue, big blue bomb in the middle of all.
Speaker 2: Of just uh, Tom, We're gonna bust on to the
next segment of the show where we don't just talk
about any lad, not the lads that rob the truck,
not this lad, that lad, Our Lord and Savior Jesus
Christ rising this sun. And know we're talking about a
very specific lad the second segment of the showtime we
call it this lad.
Speaker 1: It was work. I was going to suggest our Lord
and Savior Jesus Christ, but you know we would.
Speaker 2: I didn't know how we would get through that without.
Speaker 1: Well blasphemy aside. I think we wouldn't have. Had we
could've done a whole show. We might do him sometime.
Let's just do it, you know, a deep drive into
Jesus and because I don't think you'd fit his whole
story in in fifteen minutes, not having a bit of
crack off anything. Because we have to.
Speaker 2: Assume that Jesus Christ on the Tom and Jerry Show
and ever expect to see heaven in the last of
your lifetime. But here we are. Well, but you got
to tell you he died. He has risen this Sunday.
But when it comes, Tom, if you're a man like me.
Speaker 1: A four day weekend, oh for me, I'll make an
a six day weekend. Yeah, that's a week.
Speaker 2: Tom, Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah yeah, nice, nice nice. I'm
off on Good Friday and Eastern Monday, so that's a
big bang four day weekend. And a lot of listeners
of the Tom and Jerry Show are probably like that
as well, or at least if nothing else, you've got
the Monday off, you've got a three day weekend, four
day weekend stretching ahead at you. And as has become
popular in this country, Tom, that can become a time
to bust out the powerwasher. Hard has been lying up
all winter. It's easter that there's a bit of daylight
in the day. It's not a bit of walk there
now ye again at the start of the year. Time
to bust out the h the powerwasher. I'm getting mine ready,
my trusty character K seven ready to blast a couple
of flagstones at the weekend, very much looking forward to it.
Podcast on Protective Goggles on just Blast all my cares away.
Speaker 1: Sorry for absolutely scoffing when you said, because you said
to me, all won't we right prediction? I have so
many goggles star and I just want I don't know why,
I just won't wear them. I was drilling overhead just
before the show bird proof in the front of the garage. Honestly,
I have a problem with it. Does swell As make
it back this year? And then I just burned the
fucking garage with them in it. But no, I've bird
proofed it and I'm drilling overhead and even at one
point herself comes over with a whole the letter I
guess you will not. She's like, do you want a
pair of goggles? As this dust was just falling straight
into my retinas and I was like, no, Jerry, get
so much satisfaction if you found out I was wearing.
Speaker 2: We're going to end this podcast in a couple of
years time looking like fucking late by got Grove era.
PG and Duncan. You are going to be blind going
about with classes and I'm just gonna be fucking leading
you about the place.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. That might be the greatest niche reference that
has ever happened in the Dan near ten years of
the Toma Jerry Show. PG and Duncan for that one
little bit where ant of Dick I think went blind.
It the we might get them on the get the
leads on the podcast not up to a lot these
days Welcome.
Speaker 2: Yeah we might. We might actually do the blinding of
at McFarland in a later episode, but from now we're
talking about Easter. I'm busting at the character case seven powerwashing,
powerwash my yard at the weekend. Maybe a lot of
you folks are, but it's puzzles in mind of an
old Tom and Jerry episode with a long long time
ago called Toolbox Legends, where we talked about the people
behind the tools and we said fuck it. In honor
of the first long weekend, we have to do a
power a bit of power washing. We'd take a look
at the lad behind Carterer Carcher himself, mister character.
Speaker 1: Do you know what it has to be said? If
you're gonna put your name on a thing, it's gotta
be good, not you know what I mean. You're not
gonna call it the buzzwash two thousand, Yeah, you know,
if you're gonna just go like prior to character being Carcher,
he was it was just a surname, so it'd be
like it'd be just like McBride, although McBride powerwashers does
have a good grin to like Mikhail's. Baler's are the
best in the world.
Speaker 2: So you know what I mean it it does two
people Tom, you know, you know great times like when
mister mister Williams, you know, yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, or Black and Decker yeah yeah yeah, right
enough massive.
Speaker 2: But we we thought, like, you know, the listeners might
like to learn a little bit about the people behind
the tools we hold in the hands. So we're gonna
be dropping a couple of toolbox legs here and there
throughout the Tom and Jerry Show as we go on forward.
We're nearly at one hundred episodes. I don't know why
we haven't been doing this all along time, to be honest,
which sitting right there all the weeks that we had
fucking know this legs.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but you know what, sometimes this let's just put
their hand forward. And I think character is that it's
got to be the It's got to be the one. Actually,
it's the Henry, isn't It's it's it won't let you down.
It's the It's the Henry. It's so many households. It's
a character. The old man, I think he is. He's
upgraded from his character. He loves the powerwasher, he loves it.
He's upgraded put the character. He still has a soft
spot for it in his heart, but he's after buying
a fucking animal other thing now that would split the concrete.
I don't know what he got there for.
Speaker 2: Well, I mean like the character is very much the
how will I say it now, it's like the Black
and Deck or of Powerwashers, Like, Yeah, you're not going
to take a character on a site anymore than you're
going to take like a Black and Deck or Sander
on a site with getting laughed out of it, you know,
but it.
Speaker 1: Wouldn't last the pace of doing that at a professional level.
Put perfectly fine. When Jerry needs to blow the winter
Mass office couples of.
Speaker 2: My eighteen foot by eighteen for the cobblestones, all the
land I own in the world, fucking prisoners with more
real estate than I have.
Speaker 1: I'm fucking jealous that you can contain it to that,
to be honest, that you don't need to bring a
livestock to fucking tempt down your fucking well, let.
Speaker 2: Me tell you about the short and eventful life of
Alfred Karcher. What a man the guy you're on about there.
Alfred character was born in the second of January nineteen
thirty five, and, as the name would suggests Thomas got
a couple of the little loom lights over the aar
there that tells you straight away he's not Scottish.
Speaker 1: What part of Nigeria is he from?
Speaker 2: He is from Germany, From Germany. He was born in
excuse me, he was born.
Speaker 1: A cough sounded like a real pregnant calugh that you
put it there on purpose. Actually he was born.
Speaker 2: I'm leading you into it. He was born in nineteen
oh one and he died in nineteen fifty nine. Toime,
I'm not an old man when he died. He was
not even sixty at that stage. And if you look
at Germany between nineteen oh one and nineteen fifty, Yeah,
we got a story to tell here, buddy.
Speaker 1: So I mean, like many things and I have nothing open.
You sprung him on me, and I got excited straight
tow it, because anything to do with tools I'm gonna
get excited about. So I did, I want you to
tell me everything is like where does like where?
Speaker 2: How?
Speaker 1: He can't have just decided nobody in Knight. Let's say
he's twenty two and he gets up and going as
an engineer or whatever, he mechanic or whatever. He was
Nobody in nineteen twenty four, was looking for their yard
to be powerwashed.
Speaker 2: Er, well, you know, you'd be very surprised, Tom, you'd
be very surprised. But first and foremost, no, nobody was
looking for their you ad to be powerwashed there when
young Alfred in nineteen thirty five was what was there?
Speaker 1: Like?
Speaker 2: Nobody was thirty four thirty some odd years of age,
along with his father, founded the Alfred character Okay, here
we go, let me stretch up here for this one.
Speaker 1: So nineteen thirty five, you say, nineteen thirty five the
Alfred character color our uniforms at the world, at the workplace.
I wonder Mardy Brown.
Speaker 2: He founded the Alfred character commanded, you'll sell shaft command
this yet No, no, fuck it the Alfred Character company.
Fuck it. I don't know, I can't. That is like
the lungest word I have ever seen in my goddamn life.
Speaker 1: Ah.
Speaker 2: And they did not make powerwasher's brother, They made emersion heaters.
Speaker 1: Right, Okay, well, okay, do you know what I mean?
Speaker 2: Like, do you know there's something just telling me Tom
as I as I as I learned that today, there's
something just telling me that I might have sold in
my life in the hardware shops immersion heaters with the
character logo on.
Speaker 1: I'll be surprised as they walked away from it. I mean,
still a thing that's required at the minute, or do.
Speaker 2: You know the yeah that the willis flasks, So I
don't know, I'm gonna have to just just just when
I read that, I was just like, oh yeah, fuck yeah,
remember character anyway, regardless of which, they were rocking and
rolling in nineteen thirty nine, done done, done, when all
of a sudden nothing happened. It was a great time
and everybody had fun. Ninety thirty nine from World War Two.
You know, we had this when we did tool Box
Heroes last time that Bosh did their best to stay
out of the war. And they're like, oh, no, shit, no,
I guess we got to make windscreen wipers for a character.
Was he was there because he was so specialized in
immersion heaters and whatnot. They said, if you can heat
an immersion then you can heat the wings and tail
units of the Luftwaffe if they ice up.
Speaker 1: Well, you know what, that's any of the engineer, I
don't care who you are, that's a challenge. Do you
know you're gonna go Hey, you know what, let me
have that. And you know what, and this is like
I've heard people kind of get busy about you know,
who worked during the war and stuff. Yeah, you have
no problem with up and driving around v w's. It's
no problem with driving around BMW's. And by the way,
the amount of American companies that were on both sides,
and but they were funding both sides through products, and
then when when the war ended, the American they retracted
and their American ones just sued Germany for lots of
lots of earnings because the war had ended over. You know, so,
I I you gotta make a book.
Speaker 2: You gotta make a book. But I'm gonn tell you something, Tom.
It sticks in my fucking crawl that these lads worked
through the war and put and profited from the war
effort in Germany and still to this day are charging
me fucking three you know what I mean?
Speaker 1: Do you know what I'm gonna put it?
Speaker 2: Really improfitable? No, you did pretty good fucking streak there
for ten years.
Speaker 1: Last. Look, if the fure has a gun to your
head that says you have to make my things warm,
you got the fuck right? Fine?
Speaker 2: Allright? Okay, And I suppose if our hands are four,
then we better do all our manufacturing in Russian, Polish, French.
It's described here tom work camps.
Speaker 1: So no, but they were clean as work camps in
all of Europe, I'm.
Speaker 2: Gonna tell you so. Not only were they making you know,
wing warmers for the love and like little fan heaters
for the pans or no for the the foker aircraft.
You know, if you were cool and you turned on
a heater, it's a character, you know. Those pilots are like,
oh God, we love we love character. We love it
all day. They were also making we cookers like it
seems to be just like whatever the equivalent of an
air frier was back in the day, like small household
equipment for warming up your sausages and share.
Speaker 1: Well, look chair, I mean to the victor's go the
it tells the story like I'm just like to shake off,
to shake I'm not excusing working for fuel, but what
I'm saying is to shake off that funk and come
out the back end of it still selling powerwashers to
Jeremy Bryden, Ireland. Yeah know, in the in the two thousands,
it's good going, that's good going in anybody's book. That's
good going. General, that's quite a that's quite a funk
to shake off yourself there. So he went anyway, So
the war, the war ended, he had a fast turnaround
because I mean he only died in the He died
in his fifty so he had a fast turnaround to
make a state of the art household name like well.
Speaker 2: Tom twist goodthubn good tubbin. But did he But did
he Tom? Because no? Yes. In nineteen fifty Character started
to develop the first domestic high pressure cleaner, and they
were hot water cleaner. So I guess there would be
we would use today for washing out milk and parallels
and shit like that. Yeah, yeah, whatever the equivalent of
that is. You're not going to wash You're not a
power hos in your yard with.
Speaker 1: Hot No, but you yeah you can. You can get
those all right, And they pretty much had their own.
It's again the immersion heater exactly.
Speaker 2: That's what they're doing. It's electric delivered really fast. Yeah
yeah yeah, But it wouldn't have been I dare say
for domestic use.
Speaker 1: No, this thing probably either came around in the truck
or a man had to come and build it on
your site, and it was.
Speaker 2: For it was for cleaning out. I'm saying milk and parlors.
I wonder what else Germany wanted to clean out in
a hurry round about that time.
Speaker 1: Do you know they're still their souls? I imagine, yeah.
But look, he was a man for all corners of
the war. It would see.
Speaker 2: Well, here's the thing, and he was then a man
for all corners of a coffin because in nineteen fifty
nine he died of a heart attack.
Speaker 1: He developed a domestic sold thing.
Speaker 2: That's the twist, because that's when all of a sudden,
this lad becomes this lady Irene, Irene Charter. That's an
Irene character. That's a great name of the business.
Speaker 1: I bet I just imagine her hair done like you know,
a real Hilda from back in the day, like like
just curled up at the sides, stripped doc clothes only making.
Speaker 2: Of the time. I'm just like, you know, she was
either like a books and Blonde in an SS uniform
or like a house frow, you know, waving.
Speaker 1: A role in Books and Blonde, because you know, he'd
made a name for himself.
Speaker 2: Well, regardless of which, she was one smart cookie because
she increased revenue by seventy percent. For a woman to
do that in the fifties year after so her husband
was taken along doing all right, doing rightly, and she
was just like, I'm going to raise revenue by seventy percent.
Post war Germany, post like the fall.
Speaker 1: Like to be able to do that, That's what I'm saying,
like to shake off the funk. Germany went into a
fucking spiral, downward spired after both wars and prior to
the First War, they went in that downward spiral. They
weren't the recovery was only for the rich really at
the time, I well, for hard to take what would
have been I guess, to go domestic when people hadn't
a part to pisson like, rather than trying.
Speaker 2: To go to the strict domestic just yet Tom, but
you know, for large business councils and all this kind
of thing, like when when when characters were selling powerwashers
back then they were selling like powerwashers to the councils
to clean buildings and clean graffiti and and and do
you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, I just looked up the word powerwasher in German.
Speaker 2: I do that what I couldn't pronounce up the way.
Speaker 1: Oh I'm just part of this word. I'm not saying
out loud. Fucking no, it's a wash oh wreck Ryan, No, No,
that will cancel the that will cancel it.
Speaker 2: I just anybody go no one side of caution with that. People.
Speaker 1: You go and just look for the translation powerwasher to
German and have a look. Why Tom didn't try.
Speaker 2: It led the company to strength upon strength and built
it into the global powerhouse that it is today. She
established offices all over the Shengan area, so the Germans
made it throughout mainland Europe by fucking herker by crokr body,
and then in nineteen seventy five opened their first production
facility outside Germany in Brazil. Not beating the fucking allegations here, lad,
I'll tell you that much.
Speaker 1: Wow, they went to Brazil. Interesting Argentina, a very interesting.
Speaker 2: Argentine is a little too on the nose, Lad, go
a foot to.
Speaker 1: The right, Yeah, because you know there would be conspiracies
to say that they went there too. It's quite a
big place, Jesus, all the places to go.
Speaker 2: What the fuck was wrong with Egypt? I'm gonna tell you, Look,
what do I know what do I know about the
production of powerwashers for large scale cancel purposes and becoming
the number one name in power washers until nineteen eighty five.
Tom nineteen eighty five is when the first high pressure
cleaner for domestic use started to roll out in the shops.
Speaker 1: And is it is it still owned by character?
Speaker 2: Did they like it is still owned by character? Yes,
the character has passed away in nineteen eighty nineties. Well
the excuse me, but like children, grandchildren, holy like that.
Speaker 1: In anybody's eyes, I think this lad is actually irene
because oh yeah, no, absolutely the visits.
Speaker 2: Snatched the ball there and move. That was the twist
in the middle of it all together.
Speaker 1: And I'll tell you what, Like, it's one thing to
start with the old man and then all of a
sudden a war o starts as they just need your stuff.
You're like, okay, well there's no even sales and marketing here,
it's just you need my stuff. I'm going to make
your stuff. But the war friends Germany's not got a
great name at the time. He dies, and she takes
the ball by herself as a woman in the fifties
and turns it into a fucking global household name monster
like that is not I'll be it. I'm not saying
like you're saying, there's still entirely one but by the Watchman.
I was almost said owned by the fewer, but it's
owned by the family. And yes, so we can assume
that there's very little official investment came in. But hm hmm,
just the very fact that the first place they went
to was fine North America Brazil. Immediately there was like
what did you call him, like an angel investor, like
a mentor, So there was a mentor somewhere there, just
not saying that Irene needed a hand and go girl
power and all the rest of them both.
Speaker 2: Someone had boots on the ground in South America. It
was friendly to German business, which is what what what in.
Speaker 1: The business world, it would call it open a soft,
soft meeting between the two. That's because it's a big jump, now,
big jump to go all the way to Germany and
across four time zones and end up in Brazil. So
I'm interesting. It would be a very interesting to do
a proper investigation into something like that and how they
ended up where they ended up. But then what you'd
probably open it up would be BMW shut you down,
all these other ones just going.
Speaker 2: You know, I got to tell you we're we're in
too deep already.
Speaker 1: We need that type of podcast. Yeah, much like I
take the ball and run with it yourselves.
Speaker 2: I mean, like, you know, be the be the be,
the be the winner you want to be. And we
hope that's a little interesting nuggets of information for you
about the history of the Character Family while you're powawashing
your backyard.
Speaker 1: The Character Family. It makes them sound like they're going
to be like a a Bible musical group, doesn't it.
Speaker 2: Like yeah and.
Speaker 1: Pray, Oh, it's the Character Family. I love them. I
love them very clean, very clean, not dorek on them
people at all.
Speaker 2: There you go, they have exceptionally good washers. Listen, there
you go a little bit of a history lesson of
the Character Family down through World War Two and beyond.
But me and Tom like to take you on another
little history lesson to the wrap up of the Tom
and Jerry Show. Here Every week, when we look back
on the things that have changed in our lives from
the early eighties when we were born to whatever the
fuck year this is now, we look back on it
all in our closing segment. We remember when when I
was a young lad twenty or thirty or forty years ago.
Speaker 1: This again as it came about really as a result
of a current happening, because I sent Jerry on an
article the other day and I just I'm going to
get it up judge a second quote it right, so
it would seem there was a viral video. There was
a viral video went around quite recently, and it's of
a squirrel vaping in a park. I don't Yeah, everybody's vaping.
Some people are saying it's not real and stuff like that,
but I've seen squirrels and they i'd squirrels rip open
bird feeders. They're little. Anything that has hens in the
animal kingdom is letal, do you know what I mean?
It's little. You'll see monkey smoking and the people go, well,
I don't know if the course is because of the
fruity flavors. That definitely if the one the picture that
went viral isn't the one, I guarantee a squirrel somewhere
in the world. I've met some of the most aggressive
squirrels when I lived in America, Like proper, I'm fucking
walking the squirl. Yeah, Like if seagulls have learned in
double to steal a sandwich and a chip straight out
of your hand while you're about to put in your mouth.
I promise your squirrels are vaping and what this kind
of and they're.
Speaker 2: In a good company. Tom. Now everybody's vaping.
Speaker 1: Tom, You vape, brother, Yeah, yeah, yeah, less and less
these days, thank god. I'm putting it away more and
more these days. But it doesn't it doesn't seem to
It's quite a low dosage and everything in it.
Speaker 2: That sure, that's what we wanted to talk about here,
and we remember when. Yeah, actual fact, I got to
lean on you here, buddy, because the subject about today
is smoking because you are a smoker. Tom. You've been
a smoker. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I have ever been a smoker.
I've smoked maybe ten cigars in my whole long life.
Speaker 1: Ah, you're missing out, you're missing out. It was It's
fantastic because smoke.
Speaker 2: And I just wanted to I just wanted to ask you, Tom,
because you were at the forefront of this here now
of smoking as a smoker over the last thirty forty years.
You might just think, well, yeah, you know, Spencer and
the hedges, all the air every day. No, No, that's
what it used to be. That's what your dad started
smoking Benson and Hedges in the fifties and smoking on
the little nineties or whatever like that. Straight through, Tom,
you've had an whole manner of nicotine delivery systems, whether
to smoke better, smoke worse, smoke less, or just get
fucking more of it in you.
Speaker 1: That's the thing it there was. I suppose it probably
came about when they finally had to admit that they
weren't good for you. Do you remember when that that
movie do you know what I mean?
Speaker 2: No, Tom, they were saying that in the fifties.
Speaker 1: Ah, but you know that was just rival gangs, that's all.
It was just rival gangs. There was a moment there
mental ones. They're supposed to be good for you and stuff,
but where they were just was never It was definitely
never admitted by the cigarette companies, you know what I mean.
They didn't have to write any warnings on the packs.
Speaker 2: We have seen a lot of changing cigarettes down through
the years. Well, let me ask you a question, Tom, Now,
when did you start smoking?
Speaker 1: Probably had the odd fag in school, you know, the
bolcks like and that's the thing that would happen then
really a couple of you know, it's smoking a bit
in college when you drink and stuff like that, but
it wasn't a still like an into construction really and
then it's all out, it's all out.
Speaker 2: And here here's the here's the thing right with smoking
back in the day, even the packs, as you mentioned there,
the packs look completely different. Both my parents smoked and
it was just a colorful pack of cigarettes with no warnings, nothing,
legs cut off.
Speaker 1: I smoked. I smokeding, actually smoked. Do you know what happened?
I brightly smoked in the summer. I went to America
right because they were like the the my boss, she
was the captain of the security company, and because with
all ranks they were being America. They did it really
for the top, over the top. But she used to
buy me cartains. They were like American Spirit or something
like that. To me, it tasted exactly like Marlboro lights
and it was for nothing then full white filter and
everything felt like one of the Golden Girls or something.
I was smoking with her out the back, but it
was they were I fucked. I'm gonna say it out loud.
They had a big gold eagle on them. They were
cool as shit.
Speaker 2: Shit, So like little by little, more and more stickers
started appearing. One I remember, like this is how far
back I'll go. I remember there came like a little
white stamp on a pack of cigarettes and it's still
on it to this day. And it's some sort of
customs sort of thing.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah, and it used to have them, which
she used to be able to get ten packsture. One
stage you could buy a single cigarette. You could buy
a single cigarette, yeah yeah, and the like it's it's
it's slowly but surely, like more horrific pictures of lungs
and dead children around the front of packets, and it
didn't determine, deteriorate any of your yearnings for a cigarette,
did knock back nothing. It were wasting their time and
like I said, it didn't really. It wasn't an admission
by the cigarette companies. Philip marri has been the I suppose,
the king of them all. There was no real admission
that until the retailing was in that that film was
the Informer with or The Insider with Russell Crow. Yeah yeah,
he blew the whistle basically on the cigarette companies, and
they finally had to come around and go, yeah, okay,
we're putting two thousand chemicals into him, and I'd switched
to like rollies, you know, which is I mean, it
was just raw tobacco, you know what I mean, And
it would slow you down because you actually had to stop.
And if it's fucking raining, which it was a lot
of construction, you just didn't have one. So they weren't
that easy easily accessed. But I do remember I remember
the smoking band coming in into bars and stuff like that,
and it was this apros like, what the fuck kind
of nunny state of we turning, of course, offered lows
of opportunities to small builders who went on building extensions
with vent you know. And then of course they stopped smoking.
You can't be smoking in a cafe or a restaurant,
what the fucks now? Smoking on planes had been stopped
a long time, so I kind of understood there was
places you couldn't smoke. So as time went on in
the construction industry, it's too easy. Everybody smoked, and if
you have to talk to a guy, which I did,
I had to go around the whole huge fucking site
of one hundred and eighty acres, talk to different men
and at every point talk about it. Stop what they
were doing, whether it was on the shovel, laying a
pipe on a digger, they'd all stop and go, don't
go away, got right, and you would find yourself doing
the same thing before you know it. Then you're a
figure two in. You're going right, so we know it's
grand and you're a wake and two fangs have been
had in this conversation. So there was an it was
an epidemic of cigarette smoking. And you'd see the odds
sign going up in an office and the going too
much smoking and you need to look after your head.
But we have some cartoony sign that. Of course, the
construction industry were harangued into putting up around but they
didn't give a shit.
Speaker 2: It didn't give a you know what I mean, don't
wear hard hats space where sh it's been dropped directly on.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so fags are the we can keep them off
the fucking heroin. That'll be good, right, So Tom, tell
me when was your first attempt?
Speaker 2: I can failed, but.
Speaker 1: Yeah I did fail because I can never I can
remember it. It was would have been two thousand and five,
maybe two thousand and five at this stage, and I
can remember coming off them and I was using patches
brought up nicarette.
Speaker 2: Our patch is still a thing. They are, They are
still a thing, and and and and like you knowing
Tom wouldn't know what a nicorette patch was. But that
was like a little sticker that you stuck on your
arm exactly slowly leaked nicotine inch your system right.
Speaker 1: And I think I must have gotten too strong of one,
like there wasn't. I was trying to gauge how many
cigarettes I smoke versus what I need, because there were
different strengths of them, okay, And I can remember putting
one on my arm and my whole fucking arm bean
like I got punched. It was dead for the day.
I'm like, what the fuck? You peel this thing off?
And this ship had been leaching into your skin. I
just fucking, oh my god. Produced there was still the
twiddly fingers. It was too much of a habit built in,
so really the time to do would be like when
you were taking two weeks holidays is just breaking the habit.
And I remember that time we'd lasted almost a month
going and I was going maybe maybe over these things
and just something happened. It was like a Friday, and
I can remember. The guy's name was Marking some coved.
He was built like a fucking three ton digger and
he was down on a trench and he just went
fig and my hand went out, took it and had
it lit before I realized yeah, and I got all
light headed, and ever then, any normal rational person listened
to as would go. Of course, it felt disgusting. You
walked away from all together. I went absolutely not if anything.
That cigarette had two little grappling hooks, and I I went, gotcha, gotcha, dying, gotcha.
Speaker 2: Here's the thing with the patches, though, I wonder what
kind of effect they would have had on someone who
had never smoked before.
Speaker 1: In our life, this is a question we often asked, like,
I would imagine they'd make you violently sick. I would
imagine it was such an overload. Now here's the thing,
Much like anything with the word en at the end
of a caffeine toring, you know they're they're a stimulant,
so not nicotine. Nicotine by itself only clear nicotine is
actually not terrible for you. It's not good for you,
but it's not terrible for you. It's all the shit
that the cigarette companies put in it to flavor keep
it lit preservedly from rotting in the box while it's
sitting on a fucking port somewhere. They it's stolen by
the Italians, let's make and the amount of addictive chemicals
that they put into it, Like a one stage cigarettes
has something close to this, eighteen hundred different touches of
chemicals in them, like the cigarette you get in a box.
Horrendous fucking things all to get their hooks into you.
And I remember that cigarette. It was like a silk cutter.
It was a silk god. I even remember that. It
was fucking grotesque, but I horsed into it anyway, light
headed out for a couple of pints that night. Sure
you're gone, but I tried the gum then at that
that did fuck on. You saw together.
Speaker 2: Again, that's just like a literally like nicotine chewy.
Speaker 1: Yeah, just like a chew. It was a chew. It
made no sense at all. It was the problem was
my environment. If I was working in an office, I
think I probably would have had much better success because
there's only a designated time. You can't speak while you're
working in construction. You fucking can no problem. Very liberating
when you think about it, but trying to come off
the fags back in the day when every horse seemed
to fucking smoke, and you're talking to all these horse
I only dealt with outdoor stuff. I didn't deal with
anything indoors. Once it the roof went up, I'm out
of business. I wanted the next thing, groundworks, diggers, and
I'll never forget. One of my favorite people, Lord of
Marker sent Me, died only recently and he he reverenced
him on this show before. His name was Dick Shelley
was an execator driver from the hone. He was nor
Tipperary these Tipperaries, well, no north East it would be yeah,
I mean Nortis Tipperaries. Answer to Fred Dibner the traction engines,
but far more foul mouthed, hilarious. Used to come out
with phrases year that we're just I've actually got a
bank of him that I'm gonna I'm gonna do it
in a show some year. But he he used to smoke,
damn near a full pouch of old Holborn, which was
notoriously strong. It was nearly as strong as pipe tobacca. Yeah,
he would smoke nearly a full pouch of that in
an entire day. This excavator driver called Dick and he
was being told by friends of families had to come
off the facts. There comes a certain point, tip and point,
and we've all heard of Nannette that smoked. She was
ninety eight and she came off of from one day.
She died because the body just what you know. And
Dick was me in told left right and Cindria had
to come off the cigarettes. And I'll never forget.
Speaker 2: I went, you're not going to come off Jizabeth.
Speaker 1: And he went to a hypnotist, which were big at
the time.
Speaker 2: Okay, go on.
Speaker 1: So he went to hypnotist. And I was intrigued with
this because it was like maybe I go myself. But
I was like, you know, I figured I was good
to this fellow'll do nothing for me. And there comes
upon Dick was trying to describe to me this guy
was had him holding imaginary balloons in his hand and
he was fucking no time, but he was he had
no tobacco with him, right, So I'm like, so you're
off the fags that man for two days. It was
almost like you you put you put some sort of
malware into a high performing computer. It was still kind
of working. But something was way off. Something was something
was direct like, something was off. He was just where
he was normally sharp and sparky, and he was always
with the quick quips. He was like a guy who
just wasn't there, you know what I mean. He was
just not right, Like he was like what and it
was me By the day day three, I'm like, I
think we both think you need to go back in
the cigarettes. He's like yeah, And he lived another ripe
age he lived. I could assume he was sixty. He
lived into his eighties. Like you know what I mean, Well,
smoking happy comes a tipping point where you smoke so
much where you just can't come off them. But the
hypnotist one was always the one.
Speaker 2: The hypnotist actually, you know, that's the very purpose of
we remember when, because every now and then it'll just
throw something up that will really flash something very very
big in your brain. Like fuck, yes, I'd forgotten all that.
That was a big thing.
Speaker 1: They were making money. They were making they were making
hypnotists all over the country were making money getting people
off the smokes.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that was like two thousand and four, two thousand
and five, like there came a wave of that through. Yeah,
and I guess I guess it talies with the smoking
ban and people being just all of a sudden, like
the mid two thousands was really where we were like
and you want to say, ninety state governments and all
this kind of tract They really were just saying like,
we cannot build hospitals quick enough for the rate that
people are going to them from smoking related illnesses. But
we do love that smoking revenue. Is there a halfway house?
Is there something we can have? Yeahgan throwing a smoking
ban here here and here, and at least we'll we'll
we'll slow it down a little bit. But I remember
a lot of people going to hypnotists and and and
they come around and they go to like the hotels,
Like so there'll be the smoking hypnotist is going to
be in the Glen Carn next week.
Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it'd be like.
Speaker 2: You going turn to town just selling out shows.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it was amazing, Like he know, he had to
get an appointment for this guy. But I do remember,
like you said, to be a guy he's going to
be there between the you know, whatever in a certain hotel,
and it was a thing because people were worried coming
off them, and there was I remember there was one
thing you could get. It was a tablet you could
actually get prescribed. It's cause, uh, Champicks. What's the name
of the Champics Champis. I'm sure there was like a
that might be a brand name, you know. I mean
it was champ Picks or Chanticks or he was Champicks,
I'm nearly sure. And a couple of lads tried it
and it just made him super fucking It didn't really
knock back ravings all that much, but it made him
super fucking ill.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it is Champicks. It's like it's like the champions.
It's like smoking.
Speaker 1: I guess we're supposed to knock back your cravings. So
it's like the ozen pic of fags back in the day.
Speaker 2: There you go, I just sort of still on the go,
are they Oh yeah, I know you can get Champicks
ace even if you want.
Speaker 1: Right, Okay, Yeah, there was, I mean, there's there was
anybody that's you see, I suppose we're vaping took off then,
because I suppose there was. The argument was that they
were it was a healthier alternative, more socially acceptable alternative.
Two cigarettes like whether it is or it isn't.
Speaker 2: Well, I gotta tell you Tom before before the vapor
and I seem to remember, it was like a little no,
I didn't I know of people that had them, rather
than oh yeah it was a little fake cigarette.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah, it was like a little plastic to
be honest, it looked like a period applicators. What it
looked like.
Speaker 2: Yeah, like a little fucking tampon thing.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: And the gimmick with it was that you you you
drew on it. You take at least yeah, yeah, and
you were sucking. I guess inside was just like a
little wall paper.
Speaker 1: I think that some such yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm
pretty sure somebody opened one one that show show me one.
But like you could see the guy was just fucking
dying inside. It was like, this is terrible.
Speaker 2: I didn't recall as well now and again I'm looking
in rather than looking at on all this. But one
of the earliest cigarettes I ever seen looked like a
cigarette with a little red tip that would.
Speaker 1: Be yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it wasn't.
Speaker 2: It wasn't what we would call a vape. These days.
It was just I think it had like a little
water nicotine in it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, there were, that's exactly, and it was there was
no there was a glow off, but I think it
was just pure.
Speaker 2: It was just it's just more.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, you would. There must have been a little
fur behind it, sorry, because it would glow as per
how much sucking you were doing through it, like it
would actually glow brighter than So there must have been
some sort of little, like I said, some little turbine
just to get it go. It wasn't necessary, but there
were ones, and they were very chalky. I remember trying
one of those for a couple of weeks and they
were very fucking chalky. It was just a cloud of
fucking dust that would go into your lungs like but again,
not good healthy smoke. I think the big problem that
at the time it's because we'd passed, because I can
never understand, like, wow, why what is the addiction to
these fucking things? And it really was the ability to
be allowed to smoke them anywhere. And there's social connection
that you would have with lads you worked with because
you'd come to a stopping point or a discussion point
and a city would come out then like it was
almost like, I mean, they've done away with the advertising
and formula one and stuff and a little quick one.
Speaker 2: Did you know?
Speaker 1: Do you know when Benson and Hedges were sponsoring Jordan, right,
Eddie Jordan's cards, So Eddie Jordan had done a deal
at the time, so they're like they were gold, black, golden,
and red. And he went because it was mentioned heads colors,
but that color actually becomes like jockey's becomes your assigned color.
Then ye recard and he had done a deal with DHL.
He was doing a deal with DHL at the same time,
and DHL went, yeah, but you can't really be associated
with fangs because no, the fangs are on the way out.
They're gone. So let's us do a deal to go
man because DHL at the time we're white and red.
And that dad will tell you we did. We did
any Jordan a couple of a couple of months back.
That will tell you how strong of a salesman he was.
He went, you want to be class if he changed
your color branding to yellow and red, way way better,
way better look mc donald's Cogan universe. You know what
I mean? Heaven knows what he said at that meeting.
But to get DHL to go, yeah, that's a great
idea for your Jordan cards, which are now wrapped up.
He got him to change their entire livery their and
DHL is yellow and red to this based based originally
on the cigarettes, beds and and hedges, which originally gave
the color like Eddy for you like Eddie. So that
was that was when they went out. But then it
was I couldn't really grasp this level of negativity towards
it or how it was so addictive because I wouldn't
actually smoke an awful lot by myself, indeed, because for
a long time I lived by myself when I was
working construction, and I wouldn't smoke. And you smoke one
in theeed and maybe after the dinner or whatever, maybe two.
What are you hoof throw them during the day? It
was like, oh yeah, because it's a punctuation it's a
social social punctuation point. You know, we weren't all rushing
out for a fag because we were all the time
outside for a fag. So that's what made it super hard.
Speaker 2: So when did you start vaping?
Speaker 1: Tom?
Speaker 2: Probably even we want to get back that we want
to circle back to these squirrels.
Speaker 1: I'd say eight or nine years ago, I'd.
Speaker 2: Say, you're vaping the length of the tom and Jerry shoging.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. Immediate effects as soon as because
you start hacking up long lung butter once you stop
cigarettes for an was the same when I came off
from that time. You're just HARKing up long butter like
it's just sitting there on your lungs with the less
and lesson using this thing. I would hope, I would.
It's losing a lot of interest at the minute. I've
just I've filled my life with so many other things
that indeed, you know that it's almost wheedled its way
out of my system. Is a hindrance, is a long one.
This is why I say to people like I could
never have electric car, Gotta charge my laptop, fag phone,
the whole lot by fucking some of my power tools
in charging, and now you expect me to charge the
anxiety I have over all these things.
Speaker 2: So and they're not going anywhere. Our vapes now, the
early ones I remember, you know, they looked like what
the fucking your lads played in Star Wars, And now
they're like they're sitting in the palm of your hands,
and you get them a minty flavor or whatever anything
you fucking want. They're so good. Even the squirrels are
vaping these days.
Speaker 1: When there's price now as regular cigarette, So he mays
do one or the other. Look, if you're smoking me,
you got him. There's a world war comeing. Let's get
into it.
Speaker 2: Smoke them. If you got him is not a great
is not a great? Finish to the segment ary, Go
Tom's History two cigarettes again. It's the Tom and Jerry stance.
Don't eat nes slayer products, don't smoke.
Speaker 1: Or smoke products.
Speaker 2: Whatever you want is having a bit of cracking and
a pack of kick cats come out. Tell you what
you can do. Tell you what you can do. Never
known to cause anybody any serious harm whatsoever. Get your
ass on social media and find the Tom and Jerry Show.
You'll find us on Instagram at Tom and Jerry Show.
Tom with a T, Jerry with a G. And you'll
find me over on Blue Sky at Jerry McBride. Thom's
haunt of choice is Instagram at Tom o'many and you'll
see that lovely yellow top that the man was wearing
what else we want these find people to do tom while.
Speaker 1: You're listening, whatever platform it is, go hit hit subscribe.
If you can't hit a bell button what you can
do on Spotify. Not sure what it is on Apple Podcast.
I should really find it out, but maybe it is
as responsible. But when you do land on the bell,
hit that lend into your phone automatically every single Thursday morning.
If you can't give us the five stars where we
have a huge number of five stars, so we are
rocking a solid five stars and mix some more visible
to everybody else, so you know it'd be cool to
do that. You can most definitely leave comments at Spotify, jir,
have we any comments to go back over you?
Speaker 2: Indeed, sorry, I'm putting through it here. I'm looking for
comments for people. Yeah, Max over there on Spotify telling
us that he was a Martal arts enthusiast in his
youth and Chuck was up there with the greats. Yeah,
he was twelve when Walker came out, so yeah, he
was banging. He was banging on he was just right
where Walker. Yeah, Walker Texas Ranger. We were we were
old dad Walker's for babies.
Speaker 1: The only thing keeping me interesting was the beard. Hey, Jar,
I'm going to have to make a move. Do you
know why I'm out hearing probably one of the scariest sounds.
And man, we'll hear before a long weekend approaches. My
wife is going around the house. What sounds like a
measuring tape.
Speaker 2: Oh no, would you christ time? Okay, I'm gonna let
you go on that, folks. There was a whole bunch
of good stuff. Thanks for all the Chuck Norris jokes
over on Instagram.
Speaker 1: Oh brilliant, brilliant. And as Jerry said, if you do
follow us on on Instagram, please go have a look.
Jerry made a little demonstration there yesterday and I counter
argument made it a counterargument to it, and it should be.
Speaker 2: It should be up at the stage the sock to
me challenge. Can you turn your sockets side upside down,
close it and turn it background with all your sockets
in it? I can, Tom cannot. Good luck, Good luck,