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<v Speaker 1>Welcome to Dad's One Day Clok. Parental discussion is advised

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<v Speaker 1>mature content beyond this point.

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<v Speaker 2>You guys, I don't know why Marvel doesn't use Hulk

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<v Speaker 2>to advertise everything. He's just a huge banner. Yeah, that

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<v Speaker 2>wasn't in your Rolodex right.

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<v Speaker 3>I believe they go by she Hulk these days.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh that was That was twenty twenty four. It is

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<v Speaker 2>twenty twenty five. We're back to faggots and hulks forgots. Yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>I thought I saw a kid's video the other day,

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<v Speaker 2>not video like a movie, and they said, uh, no

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<v Speaker 2>it was It couldn't have been a kid. I don't

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<v Speaker 2>remember what it was. But they said hop out of

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<v Speaker 2>the car for a fag and I was like, wait,

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<v Speaker 2>what what did you just say? But it was British

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<v Speaker 2>for smoke form.

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<v Speaker 3>It makes sense they still do.

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<v Speaker 2>Dom. How's your week? It was good?

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<v Speaker 4>It was really good. Week was kind of quiet. It

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<v Speaker 4>did a few things around the.

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<v Speaker 5>House and then I had a wedding to go to

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<v Speaker 5>in Wickenberg at this cowboy ranch.

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<v Speaker 3>Was it inside one of the roundabouts dude range? It

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<v Speaker 3>was at a dude ranch, the dude ran ranch.

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<v Speaker 5>No, Uh, it was at this this place called Los

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<v Speaker 5>cab Larros or some crap like that, and uh, you know,

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<v Speaker 5>look it was expensive. Place was nice, but not nice enough,

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<v Speaker 5>not for what we paid for it. The wedding was gorgeous,

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<v Speaker 5>The time was fun. I got to watch seven or

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<v Speaker 5>eight year old kid slap the ever loving shit out

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<v Speaker 5>of his brother, like I'm talking grown acid, adult slap,

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<v Speaker 5>like one that left the handprint over.

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<v Speaker 3>His face coming down.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah you can.

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<v Speaker 5>You can hear it from across the entire freaking lobby

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<v Speaker 5>like you heard it before it happened. Absolutely, yeah, you

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<v Speaker 5>felt the wind, you heard the slap.

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<v Speaker 2>The kid's just balling.

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<v Speaker 5>He doesn't like, he doesn't know where he's at because

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<v Speaker 5>he's seeing stars. Kid hits the chessboard, knocks the chessboard

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<v Speaker 5>off the table because he's pissed off and he just

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<v Speaker 5>got slapped looking for his wedding. This this was prior

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<v Speaker 5>to the wedding, but it was at the same facility.

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<v Speaker 3>Knocks the chessboard off, the kids slappings like Jack and mate.

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<v Speaker 2>Mother dude.

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<v Speaker 5>I mean it was just it was as loud as

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<v Speaker 5>loud could be and the kids, the kids walking around

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<v Speaker 5>looking for his dad with this big ass handprint on

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<v Speaker 5>his fucking face, dude.

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<v Speaker 2>It was. It was great. It was absolutely phenomenal.

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<v Speaker 6>Like one of the fucking it works from us, Lord

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<v Speaker 6>of the Rings.

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<v Speaker 5>It's got a big old war paint on his face

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<v Speaker 5>from the redness. But yeah, I got to see some

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<v Speaker 5>some friends that I haven't seen in a very long time.

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<v Speaker 2>Which was cool. I actually got drunk, which was unusual

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<v Speaker 2>for me. Not trashed, but drunk.

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<v Speaker 4>You know, I was buzzed from a good portion of

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<v Speaker 4>the wedding.

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<v Speaker 2>What's unusual about that for you? I don't drink.

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<v Speaker 4>I do the last I couldn't even tell you the

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<v Speaker 4>last time I got.

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<v Speaker 2>Drunk, drunk like Saturday last night.

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<v Speaker 7>Well prior to that, Stay with Stay with No, you

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<v Speaker 7>definitely don't drink as much as used to because, like

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<v Speaker 7>like when we recorded before, you to drink like almost

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<v Speaker 7>every time I record it.

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<v Speaker 5>Oh yeah absolutely, that's yeah, that's when life was easier

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<v Speaker 5>and I can I could do it.

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<v Speaker 4>I can't do it now, no, So.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it was. It was a good weekend overall.

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<v Speaker 4>You know.

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<v Speaker 5>I got to go play golf and get yelled at

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<v Speaker 5>for eight holes straight. That there was a woman's tournament

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<v Speaker 5>behind us and I needed to speed up and if

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<v Speaker 5>anybody knows me, that doesn't happen. The second you forced

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<v Speaker 5>me to move faster for something that I paid for,

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<v Speaker 5>I'm gonna slow down.

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<v Speaker 3>He turns into thing one like, sorry, dude.

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<v Speaker 5>I understand that you had you had a frost over

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<v Speaker 5>delay in the morning. I get that, but that's not

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<v Speaker 5>my problem, and that is that should also not be

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<v Speaker 5>my penalty. I paid you one hundred and forty five

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<v Speaker 5>dollars to play on your course. You're gonna let me

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<v Speaker 5>play on your course? That fucking is that fucking simple?

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<v Speaker 5>And your course isn't even that nice. It's it was

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<v Speaker 5>maybe an eighty dollars course. I I probably would have

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<v Speaker 5>been okay paying eighty and still not being rushed. If

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<v Speaker 5>I was rushed at eighty, I still would have done

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<v Speaker 5>the same exact fucking thing and slowed down. But we

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<v Speaker 5>had twelve of us and we finished in For anybody

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<v Speaker 5>who knows, for twelve people to finish in four hours

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<v Speaker 5>and fifteen minutes is pretty fucking good.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, that's normal time.

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<v Speaker 5>Consider considering that multiple people in the group had never

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<v Speaker 5>played before, right, So yeah, one of the guys that

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<v Speaker 5>I was with on the back nine.

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<v Speaker 2>I mean three perspective, three hours is ten minutes per whole. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>and that's which is like, that's insanely fast. It's cooking,

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<v Speaker 2>so it's sour. Four hours is solid for that big

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<v Speaker 2>of a group.

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<v Speaker 5>Yeah, and uh, it was a good time golf. I

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<v Speaker 5>had a few really good shots, a few really terrible shots.

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<v Speaker 2>The last hole.

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<v Speaker 5>One of the guys on the back nine I was with,

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<v Speaker 5>we switched up the first nine, we played with different people,

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<v Speaker 5>and then we did on the back nine just to

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<v Speaker 5>kind of because the party was big, so that way

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<v Speaker 5>we kind of got to mix it up and see

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<v Speaker 5>everybody and bullshit a little bit. And then on the

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<v Speaker 5>back nine, one of the guys I had never met before,

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<v Speaker 5>he was brand new to the sport, has never done

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<v Speaker 5>anything with it, never picked up a club prior to this,

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<v Speaker 5>gets a hold of one on the last hole and

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<v Speaker 5>hits one of the construction workers that's working on.

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<v Speaker 2>The new housing that's there.

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<v Speaker 5>And so the running joke for the rest of the

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<v Speaker 5>day was he had got a hold in huan.

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<v Speaker 3>So would instead of saying four, would you yell quatro?

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<v Speaker 5>I mean no, because I wanted to see him get

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<v Speaker 5>it Puadro. So we didn't even know anybody was over

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<v Speaker 5>there when it happened. He just he hit it off

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<v Speaker 5>into the field and we didn't even realize anybody was

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<v Speaker 5>over there, so we didn't say shit.

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<v Speaker 2>We just let it happen.

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<v Speaker 5>And we get to about I don't know, maybe one

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<v Speaker 5>hundred yards to the pin, and out comes this guy

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<v Speaker 5>and he's.

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<v Speaker 2>Like, you visit your ball. We were like yeah, he's like,

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<v Speaker 2>you hit me, and he fucking just throws it in

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<v Speaker 2>the concords.

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<v Speaker 5>It's like, all right, thanks man, appreciate it to you,

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<v Speaker 5>and he just back off into the bushes. Dude, squatch, Yeah,

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<v Speaker 5>fucking disappears into the mist one.

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<v Speaker 2>Squatch one squatch.

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<v Speaker 3>Squatch.

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<v Speaker 2>But yeah, that was my weekend. It was good. It's

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<v Speaker 2>a good time.

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<v Speaker 5>Our producer went horseback riding and then she complained about

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<v Speaker 5>her legs being sore for fucking three days.

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<v Speaker 3>But that's any woman who gets on top.

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<v Speaker 2>But she only complains for six at night. Yeah, during

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<v Speaker 2>the day, she seems fine. Her eyes are open. Well

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<v Speaker 2>was it? What about you guys? You just lay there,

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<v Speaker 2>will still hurt because they to be open, you know.

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<v Speaker 5>No, they don't, they don't six when.

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<v Speaker 2>Absolutely do not suff What about eustones.

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<v Speaker 3>I didn't really have a whole lot going this week.

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<v Speaker 3>I went and hung out a bunch of friends yesterday.

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<v Speaker 3>Today kind of allergies were catching up with me a

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<v Speaker 3>little bit and and I had to run to Walmart

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<v Speaker 3>because I like, I forgot. I threw up my netty

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<v Speaker 3>pot the last time because I'd used it for a while,

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<v Speaker 3>and I was like, I sh'll probably get a new one,

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<v Speaker 3>and so this morning I went to grab it and

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<v Speaker 3>I was like, oh, fuck, as my nose is all

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<v Speaker 3>fucked up. And so I went over to Walmart and

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<v Speaker 3>as me and Avery were walking in, there was a

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<v Speaker 3>guy handcuffed on the hood of a squad car in

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<v Speaker 3>front of Walmart. And Avery's looking over there and just

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<v Speaker 3>looking bag. And I was like, we'll talk about inside,

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<v Speaker 3>and so like we get inside Walmart and I was

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<v Speaker 3>and she was like, yeah, that was a police officer, right,

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<v Speaker 3>And I was like, yeah, that guy was on the car.

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<v Speaker 3>And I was like, yeah, well, kid, he probably got

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<v Speaker 3>caught stealing or something else, like just doing bad stuff,

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<v Speaker 3>you know, and and that's what happens. He's probably gonna

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<v Speaker 3>go to jail. And Avery just blankly just was like,

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<v Speaker 3>shouldn't have been a bad guy. You read kid the

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<v Speaker 3>word still live by. I shouldn't have been a bad

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<v Speaker 3>guy all the while. He's probably just gonna get a

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<v Speaker 3>citation and fucking be let out whatever. I get a

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<v Speaker 3>hould of them out for stealing whatever, fucking bullshit.

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<v Speaker 2>I think you have to steal, you have to steal it,

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<v Speaker 2>stee over a thousand, Yeah, but you can collective now,

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<v Speaker 2>Like if you steal today, nothing happens, but they have

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<v Speaker 2>you on video and they can calculate what you stole.

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<v Speaker 2>So if you come back to the same store and

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<v Speaker 2>steal again, then they can continue toally and then once

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<v Speaker 2>you hit that mark, then they can call the cops.

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<v Speaker 3>We know it was you what. I was wearing a

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<v Speaker 3>red hoodie that day. I'm more to black one today.

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<v Speaker 2>A gotcha?

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<v Speaker 5>Gotcha sure doesn't like white like it doesn't like get

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<v Speaker 5>expunged over time doesn't work like you know, cops can't

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<v Speaker 5>give you a ticket after a certain amount of turns

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<v Speaker 5>because then you can't you know, prove.

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<v Speaker 3>No or some sh there is. I know there's a

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<v Speaker 3>three strike rule fortalities, but I don't know about mysdemeters.

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<v Speaker 3>But I'm sure like your fucking rap shoots not gonna

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<v Speaker 3>look great as it adds to it.

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<v Speaker 5>But when I was when I was a teenager, I

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<v Speaker 5>used to believe that if you cop couldn't give you

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<v Speaker 5>a speeding ticket after a certain amount of turns because

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<v Speaker 5>you couldn't prove.

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<v Speaker 2>That it was you.

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<v Speaker 5>I'm fucking dead serious, dude, I'm dead nuts.

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<v Speaker 2>Seriously.

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<v Speaker 3>On the silver fucking cars around here, You're the only

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<v Speaker 3>person that with a little paper over your license places.

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<v Speaker 2>Fuck cops. I can see the sun gleaming off of

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<v Speaker 2>your fucking bald head to the moonroom.

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<v Speaker 5>You're the only one driving to fucking Volvo with smoke

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<v Speaker 5>coming out of the window.

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<v Speaker 2>Was dumb ass, and you didn't move. You stayed stationary.

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<v Speaker 3>You're the only thing putting a bat signal during the day.

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<v Speaker 2>Jesus, I know it was you because the entire time,

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<v Speaker 2>the license plate was always the same Penny Pictures.

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<v Speaker 3>Carling sideburns, a nice license plate.

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<v Speaker 2>Like it'd be fun is if you stole enough to

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<v Speaker 2>get the cops call on you at like a Krispy

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<v Speaker 2>Kreme or Dunkin Donuts. Do you meagine be a cop

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<v Speaker 2>getting that call?

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah?

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<v Speaker 2>Right, Like I gotta go to the donut shop to

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<v Speaker 2>arrest somebody.

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<v Speaker 3>A man, I'll give you what I got, Just let

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<v Speaker 3>me go.

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<v Speaker 5>How come this guy got arrested but none of the

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<v Speaker 5>goods came in with him.

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<v Speaker 3>Sir, I was cleaning out your patrol car and there

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00:11:47.240 --> 00:11:50.000
<v Speaker 3>was a shillow to seamen everywhere. No, it was just

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<v Speaker 3>like crumbs from.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh that's what I was.

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<v Speaker 3>That's why I was sweet when I tasted.

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<v Speaker 5>Who could you imagine a fuck donut filled with custard

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<v Speaker 5>from culvers?

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<v Speaker 2>See? I think it sucks because we have shitty donuts

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<v Speaker 2>here in Kingman. Yeah, bashes used to be that's the

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<v Speaker 2>best donut, but they're not even as good as they

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<v Speaker 2>used to be, not even close. But all the other

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<v Speaker 2>places are just either frozen and then they you know,

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<v Speaker 2>roll them out, Yeah, but or they get shipped in. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>Safeways tastes like bread.

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<v Speaker 4>They don't even taste like donuts.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, that is French roll expired three days ago. What

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<v Speaker 2>do you do with the phyllis? Cut it into ten,

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00:12:35.919 --> 00:12:39.720
<v Speaker 2>throw some chocolates up on top of it. Yeah, shit,

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00:12:39.840 --> 00:12:41.120
<v Speaker 2>some sprinkles out of your coat?

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<v Speaker 3>Are those these East Flakes? Yeah? What about you know?

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<v Speaker 2>That was your week? That's pretty good. I also golfed

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<v Speaker 2>on Saturday. I had a tournament and that that was fun,

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<v Speaker 2>got a little wind, but who was good? We came in.

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<v Speaker 2>I said we should probably come in between seven and

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<v Speaker 2>ten under with the group we were playing with, and

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<v Speaker 2>we actually came in right it at seven under, and

246
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<v Speaker 2>so it was, which is good though. Yeah, that's a

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<v Speaker 2>legit score.

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<v Speaker 5>There's usually a couple of people in those tournaments that

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<v Speaker 5>don't fucking post legit scores.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, right, Well, I don't know who the winner was

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<v Speaker 2>because I ate my lunch and then left, and I

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<v Speaker 2>think they were sticking around because they had raffle ticket

253
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<v Speaker 2>stuff and I didn't do any of that. Yeah, but

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<v Speaker 2>I knew the table next to us, who's gonna be

255
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<v Speaker 2>in contention for the top? They came in at seventeen under. Yeah,

256
00:13:35.120 --> 00:13:40.480
<v Speaker 2>and so damn seventeen under. But what you were allowed

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<v Speaker 2>to do, I like the limit on it, but you

258
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<v Speaker 2>could buy two mulligans per person, and then you could

259
00:13:45.480 --> 00:13:49.480
<v Speaker 2>also buy a magic putt, and so the magic putt

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00:13:49.559 --> 00:13:52.080
<v Speaker 2>rule was if the ball was on the green, no

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<v Speaker 2>matter the distance the person calls magic putt, all three

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00:13:55.919 --> 00:13:59.080
<v Speaker 2>other teammates have to putt still. But then if they

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<v Speaker 2>all miss and it gets them, you don't have to

264
00:14:01.360 --> 00:14:05.240
<v Speaker 2>put you automatically get that counted. But if somebody makes it,

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00:14:05.360 --> 00:14:10.360
<v Speaker 2>you still lose your magic putt. We had that happened twice, Sam, No,

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00:14:11.000 --> 00:14:12.840
<v Speaker 2>both of them, like one was like twenty and the

267
00:14:12.919 --> 00:14:14.879
<v Speaker 2>other one was like a thirty five footer and it

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00:14:15.000 --> 00:14:17.639
<v Speaker 2>just and it dropped on both of them and it

269
00:14:17.720 --> 00:14:19.919
<v Speaker 2>was so as comical. So either way we would have

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00:14:19.960 --> 00:14:22.240
<v Speaker 2>gotten the birdie, but it was actually nice that we

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00:14:22.279 --> 00:14:25.240
<v Speaker 2>still earned it away. Yeah, coming later when we could

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00:14:25.279 --> 00:14:29.639
<v Speaker 2>have used those putts, you know, but whatever, it is,

273
00:14:29.639 --> 00:14:31.159
<v Speaker 2>what it is, but it was. It was a good time.

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00:14:31.600 --> 00:14:34.039
<v Speaker 2>Weather was not as good as I'd like it, but

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00:14:34.120 --> 00:14:39.200
<v Speaker 2>it was better towards the end today without actually without

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00:14:39.240 --> 00:14:40.480
<v Speaker 2>an issue. I think it was like one of the

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00:14:40.480 --> 00:14:42.440
<v Speaker 2>first home projects where I didn't have to go to

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00:14:42.480 --> 00:14:47.600
<v Speaker 2>home depot or another store again. I was incredibly shocked

279
00:14:47.600 --> 00:14:49.480
<v Speaker 2>at how easy it was because I just didn't think

280
00:14:49.519 --> 00:14:52.639
<v Speaker 2>it was going to be this easy. But I had

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00:14:52.679 --> 00:14:57.879
<v Speaker 2>to replace my garbage disposal. Oh and it was. It

282
00:14:57.919 --> 00:15:01.279
<v Speaker 2>was cake. Yeah, it was not. It was not bad

283
00:15:01.320 --> 00:15:04.679
<v Speaker 2>at all. Got a new garbage disposal, I like, upgraded

284
00:15:04.720 --> 00:15:07.360
<v Speaker 2>like a tiny bit from what we had as far

285
00:15:07.440 --> 00:15:10.240
<v Speaker 2>as horsepower, because like, I'm not sticking bones down there.

286
00:15:10.279 --> 00:15:12.000
<v Speaker 2>You know, I may people, I don't am not going

287
00:15:12.080 --> 00:15:15.159
<v Speaker 2>to two up their bones. Yeah, but uh no it was.

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00:15:15.240 --> 00:15:16.960
<v Speaker 2>It was actually really easy. But when I saw the

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00:15:17.039 --> 00:15:19.279
<v Speaker 2>video of the like the part of the sink, the

290
00:15:19.399 --> 00:15:22.200
<v Speaker 2>ring and the sink is actually part of your garbage discossal,

291
00:15:22.240 --> 00:15:24.600
<v Speaker 2>I didn't realize that. I'm like, this is gonna be

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00:15:25.080 --> 00:15:28.399
<v Speaker 2>way fucking harder than I thought. And it really wasn't.

293
00:15:28.480 --> 00:15:30.759
<v Speaker 2>I think it took me like twenty thirty minutes tops,

294
00:15:30.840 --> 00:15:33.600
<v Speaker 2>and I got the old one out, got the new

295
00:15:33.600 --> 00:15:37.320
<v Speaker 2>one in, and everything hooked up right. It's good, So

296
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<v Speaker 2>I was. I was happy with that. It was my wife.

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00:15:40.840 --> 00:15:44.559
<v Speaker 2>She was like, I didn't hear any cussing at all. Wow,

298
00:15:45.919 --> 00:15:46.559
<v Speaker 2>did you turn go?

299
00:15:46.679 --> 00:15:50.759
<v Speaker 3>Do turn you on somebody's ass getting laid tonight?

300
00:15:53.799 --> 00:15:58.279
<v Speaker 2>Uh, we don't have brast studs here. Oh yes we do.

301
00:15:58.519 --> 00:16:01.679
<v Speaker 5>I say, I sent you a picture fucking they're in.

302
00:16:03.000 --> 00:16:03.879
<v Speaker 2>That was a real picture.

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00:16:03.879 --> 00:16:05.320
<v Speaker 5>By the way, when I went to I went to

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00:16:05.360 --> 00:16:07.919
<v Speaker 5>home depot was like a week ago, and in front

305
00:16:07.960 --> 00:16:10.240
<v Speaker 5>of me was this guy wearing a shirt that said

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00:16:10.240 --> 00:16:12.639
<v Speaker 5>crazy Fred's Whorehouse truck stop and a whorehouse.

307
00:16:13.799 --> 00:16:14.480
<v Speaker 2>It's a real.

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00:16:14.279 --> 00:16:17.039
<v Speaker 5>Place, and that is a real place, and this dude's

309
00:16:17.080 --> 00:16:18.879
<v Speaker 5>just rocking this shirt out in public.

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<v Speaker 2>I was like, good, good man, wait, way to go,

311
00:16:22.320 --> 00:16:25.399
<v Speaker 2>get more power to you. And it was an old

312
00:16:25.440 --> 00:16:32.679
<v Speaker 2>shirt that was definitely been used. Yeah, you.

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00:16:34.320 --> 00:16:40.799
<v Speaker 4>Could smell it, sell the destiny and cinnamon.

314
00:16:42.320 --> 00:16:44.480
<v Speaker 2>I saw this news article that I was going to

315
00:16:44.519 --> 00:16:47.759
<v Speaker 2>ask you guys about. Don't don't bother. No, no, I'm going

316
00:16:47.799 --> 00:16:50.240
<v Speaker 2>to ask about it. So I just saw this title.

317
00:16:50.320 --> 00:16:56.639
<v Speaker 2>A Galapagos tortoise at Philadelphia Zoo becomes first time parent

318
00:16:56.799 --> 00:17:00.759
<v Speaker 2>at nearly one hundred years old. Nice. Could you imagine

319
00:17:00.759 --> 00:17:03.960
<v Speaker 2>it's still dropping a nut at one hundred Yeah, geting

320
00:17:04.039 --> 00:17:04.839
<v Speaker 2>somebody pregnant.

321
00:17:05.480 --> 00:17:09.880
<v Speaker 3>What's his name, scarface? Uh fucking godfather pets. You know

322
00:17:10.000 --> 00:17:11.240
<v Speaker 3>he's eighty six.

323
00:17:11.160 --> 00:17:11.680
<v Speaker 2>Had a kid.

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00:17:12.880 --> 00:17:16.160
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, he's right there with him. Goddamn that kid's not

325
00:17:16.200 --> 00:17:17.799
<v Speaker 3>going to graduate high school and have a dad.

326
00:17:18.200 --> 00:17:19.240
<v Speaker 2>I think not.

327
00:17:19.640 --> 00:17:22.400
<v Speaker 5>I think that that's the equivalent of us having a

328
00:17:22.519 --> 00:17:26.319
<v Speaker 5>kid at like fifty five or sixty five, for like

329
00:17:26.400 --> 00:17:29.519
<v Speaker 5>a sea turtle, because turtles live to like one thirty something,

330
00:17:29.599 --> 00:17:32.680
<v Speaker 5>one forty something or more. It's actually I don't think

331
00:17:32.720 --> 00:17:36.880
<v Speaker 5>it's even known how how long they can truly live.

332
00:17:37.440 --> 00:17:39.880
<v Speaker 5>But I think it's estimated around like one thirty one forty,

333
00:17:39.960 --> 00:17:41.920
<v Speaker 5>So let's say that's like sixty five for us.

334
00:17:42.240 --> 00:17:44.680
<v Speaker 2>That would suck. I don't think I could do that.

335
00:17:46.519 --> 00:17:47.119
<v Speaker 2>I really don't.

336
00:17:47.160 --> 00:17:47.559
<v Speaker 3>Like I can't.

337
00:17:47.599 --> 00:17:50.400
<v Speaker 2>I can't deal with the kids I got. Now, imagine

338
00:17:50.400 --> 00:17:52.200
<v Speaker 2>if you have one right now, I couldn't know.

339
00:17:52.240 --> 00:17:55.039
<v Speaker 5>I don't want to, right I don't want to imagine,

340
00:17:55.079 --> 00:17:58.480
<v Speaker 5>because it hurts. It hurts to think about, like it

341
00:17:58.519 --> 00:18:01.200
<v Speaker 5>makes me want to cry for sure.

342
00:18:01.279 --> 00:18:03.119
<v Speaker 2>I mean, you don't have to worry about it now, so.

343
00:18:03.440 --> 00:18:07.240
<v Speaker 4>I supposedly know it's true.

344
00:18:07.279 --> 00:18:10.680
<v Speaker 2>Well, I mean, I guess you'll have sex to have

345
00:18:10.720 --> 00:18:15.119
<v Speaker 2>a kid, so well not just have sex, like you

346
00:18:15.160 --> 00:18:18.599
<v Speaker 2>got to have sex with somebody that's you know, able

347
00:18:18.640 --> 00:18:25.440
<v Speaker 2>to yeah, reproduce. Can never mind.

348
00:18:26.680 --> 00:18:29.200
<v Speaker 3>Ask ask the forum. We're all here to answer your

349
00:18:29.240 --> 00:18:30.160
<v Speaker 3>burning question.

350
00:18:30.160 --> 00:18:31.039
<v Speaker 2>Not asking that one.

351
00:18:31.599 --> 00:18:35.279
<v Speaker 5>No, Nope, no, I had a good Josh moment, and

352
00:18:35.319 --> 00:18:36.680
<v Speaker 5>I said it in my head before I said it

353
00:18:36.720 --> 00:18:37.240
<v Speaker 5>with my mouth.

354
00:18:37.599 --> 00:18:40.839
<v Speaker 2>So nobody you want to Josh, you can ask us

355
00:18:42.599 --> 00:18:45.400
<v Speaker 2>it was that bad. It was that bad. It's fine.

356
00:18:45.759 --> 00:18:47.279
<v Speaker 3>Bring up Christina Richie again.

357
00:18:47.640 --> 00:18:49.880
<v Speaker 2>Oh, come on, I'd still do it. I would. I

358
00:18:49.880 --> 00:18:51.680
<v Speaker 2>would have changed my answer on that.

359
00:18:52.240 --> 00:18:54.000
<v Speaker 5>I would have a baby with her at sixty five

360
00:18:54.480 --> 00:18:57.680
<v Speaker 5>with Christina's.

361
00:18:56.359 --> 00:19:05.240
<v Speaker 3>Thirty baby Jesus christ A J.

362
00:19:06.359 --> 00:19:11.440
<v Speaker 2>I said, right now, cast, Oh well.

363
00:19:11.240 --> 00:19:13.559
<v Speaker 3>I mean, you know, go back to episode twenty or whatever.

364
00:19:14.680 --> 00:19:15.599
<v Speaker 3>Shout out to Casper.

365
00:19:17.920 --> 00:19:25.039
<v Speaker 5>Casper the Friendly Sperm like a fucking, weird, fucking movie.

366
00:19:25.279 --> 00:19:27.920
<v Speaker 2>How many have you watched it as an adult? Oh? Yeah,

367
00:19:28.039 --> 00:19:29.000
<v Speaker 2>it's been watch it.

368
00:19:29.000 --> 00:19:31.079
<v Speaker 3>Avery a couple of times. She loved that movie.

369
00:19:31.519 --> 00:19:34.359
<v Speaker 2>I know it was on not it's some either this

370
00:19:34.440 --> 00:19:36.880
<v Speaker 2>Halloween or last Halloween somewhere around there. I know it

371
00:19:36.920 --> 00:19:39.640
<v Speaker 2>was on, so Ellie could watch it and she wasn't

372
00:19:39.640 --> 00:19:40.599
<v Speaker 2>into it really at all.

373
00:19:40.920 --> 00:19:41.960
<v Speaker 4>And it doesn't surprise me.

374
00:19:42.720 --> 00:19:44.920
<v Speaker 2>I'm just like I liked it as a kid, but

375
00:19:45.359 --> 00:19:47.240
<v Speaker 2>I don't know, it's one of those kid movies I

376
00:19:47.279 --> 00:19:50.000
<v Speaker 2>have zero care to watch as an adult.

377
00:19:50.319 --> 00:19:53.559
<v Speaker 3>I feel like it's a kind of not older kid movie,

378
00:19:53.599 --> 00:19:56.359
<v Speaker 3>but like probably like nine tennish, you know, like I

379
00:19:56.400 --> 00:19:59.079
<v Speaker 3>definitely when I showed Avery when she was like three four,

380
00:19:59.200 --> 00:20:01.799
<v Speaker 3>she had like non interest. Now she does. Like last Halloween,

381
00:20:01.839 --> 00:20:04.680
<v Speaker 3>we watched it and she was loving it. But yeah,

382
00:20:04.720 --> 00:20:07.640
<v Speaker 3>before that she was and I was like, you know, yeah,

383
00:20:07.720 --> 00:20:08.759
<v Speaker 3>it's like ten.

384
00:20:08.799 --> 00:20:10.960
<v Speaker 5>I don't think he would give two fucking ships about

385
00:20:10.960 --> 00:20:11.559
<v Speaker 5>that movie.

386
00:20:11.960 --> 00:20:14.720
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, that's true, although also depends on interest.

387
00:20:14.920 --> 00:20:19.160
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, he's just starting playing Assassin's Creed, so that's.

388
00:20:19.039 --> 00:20:21.599
<v Speaker 2>Kind of more yeah style. Right now.

389
00:20:22.319 --> 00:20:25.640
<v Speaker 3>Have you guys ever seen not the Hillary Duff one,

390
00:20:25.799 --> 00:20:30.960
<v Speaker 3>but there was like a second one. Fuck it was

391
00:20:31.000 --> 00:20:36.440
<v Speaker 3>it was another Casper is like right after Yeah, but

392
00:20:38.720 --> 00:20:41.640
<v Speaker 3>when I was a kid, dude, Oh my god. But no, Like,

393
00:20:42.079 --> 00:20:43.359
<v Speaker 3>if you ever want to see some of the worst

394
00:20:43.400 --> 00:20:45.640
<v Speaker 3>CG I've ever seen in your life, like pure ninety

395
00:20:45.759 --> 00:20:50.440
<v Speaker 3>c G I, the second, the second Casper, those are

396
00:20:50.480 --> 00:20:55.200
<v Speaker 3>the are like the straight to DVDs, Like yeah, like

397
00:20:55.839 --> 00:20:58.039
<v Speaker 3>like Richie rich I remember they came up with like

398
00:20:58.079 --> 00:21:00.400
<v Speaker 3>a second and probably a third, like they just hit

399
00:21:00.440 --> 00:21:00.880
<v Speaker 3>that wheel.

400
00:21:01.400 --> 00:21:05.119
<v Speaker 2>Can we where like he wished to be poor some ship? Yes, yes,

401
00:21:05.400 --> 00:21:06.119
<v Speaker 2>this Halloween.

402
00:21:06.240 --> 00:21:09.759
<v Speaker 5>Can we get absolutely fucking blitzed and put on a

403
00:21:09.799 --> 00:21:14.720
<v Speaker 5>movie with with the projector against your your your garage

404
00:21:14.759 --> 00:21:18.240
<v Speaker 5>door and just ignore all the fucking kids trick or treating,

405
00:21:18.640 --> 00:21:22.000
<v Speaker 5>just live just watch the watching the movie.

406
00:21:22.039 --> 00:21:28.559
<v Speaker 3>Here take they have the fog machine on inside the garage. Sure, yeah,

407
00:21:29.279 --> 00:21:32.559
<v Speaker 3>machines smell like we Hey, I'm over here at the

408
00:21:32.599 --> 00:21:34.039
<v Speaker 3>garage door. You're talking to the wall.

409
00:21:34.359 --> 00:21:36.079
<v Speaker 2>All the kids and parents come up.

410
00:21:36.119 --> 00:21:38.480
<v Speaker 5>They come up and they're they're as sober as can be,

411
00:21:38.559 --> 00:21:40.759
<v Speaker 5>and they fucking turn around and leave the other side.

412
00:21:40.759 --> 00:21:43.759
<v Speaker 2>They're just as high as a fucking guy. We come

413
00:21:43.839 --> 00:21:45.480
<v Speaker 2>up with it. It is kind of like the Sticky

414
00:21:45.519 --> 00:21:49.200
<v Speaker 2>Bandits thing all over again. We come up with the

415
00:21:49.240 --> 00:21:52.519
<v Speaker 2>thing that's like, you pay us candy and we'll let

416
00:21:52.519 --> 00:21:53.799
<v Speaker 2>you hit our penty.

417
00:21:54.000 --> 00:21:58.319
<v Speaker 5>Come into our haunted with in quotation marks, are haunted garage.

418
00:21:59.559 --> 00:22:01.599
<v Speaker 2>Scared kids so much like I'll red his eyes are

419
00:22:02.279 --> 00:22:02.599
<v Speaker 2>you know what?

420
00:22:02.759 --> 00:22:04.000
<v Speaker 3>Kid, don't worry about it.

421
00:22:04.039 --> 00:22:05.480
<v Speaker 5>You don't even have to walk any further to the

422
00:22:05.480 --> 00:22:06.960
<v Speaker 5>front door. Just give me your bag right here, and

423
00:22:07.000 --> 00:22:07.920
<v Speaker 5>I'll go ahead and take care of you.

424
00:22:08.039 --> 00:22:08.519
<v Speaker 2>No problem.

425
00:22:09.039 --> 00:22:11.319
<v Speaker 3>It's been twenty minutes. He hasn't cut back with my bag.

426
00:22:13.039 --> 00:22:14.960
<v Speaker 3>The kids go open the door and it's just us

427
00:22:14.960 --> 00:22:16.079
<v Speaker 3>sitting there, all these wrappers.

428
00:22:16.440 --> 00:22:17.720
<v Speaker 2>Yeah. Kids.

429
00:22:17.920 --> 00:22:20.160
<v Speaker 5>Kids come in weighing like weighing like I don't know,

430
00:22:20.240 --> 00:22:20.960
<v Speaker 5>forty pounds.

431
00:22:21.039 --> 00:22:22.480
<v Speaker 2>They leave weighing like eighty.

432
00:22:25.480 --> 00:22:31.079
<v Speaker 3>Gretel, who fuck ribs you have? You've cooked ribs and

433
00:22:31.160 --> 00:22:34.799
<v Speaker 3>you're fucking oh man, where my ribs go? Of this

434
00:22:34.920 --> 00:22:35.720
<v Speaker 3>candy in my hand?

435
00:22:37.319 --> 00:22:39.319
<v Speaker 2>Parents like Hey, I'll bet you your kid's bag. You

436
00:22:39.359 --> 00:22:43.200
<v Speaker 2>can't take a blinker without cock o jesus.

437
00:22:43.920 --> 00:22:46.160
<v Speaker 3>Aren't you the cop down the road? I heard you

438
00:22:46.160 --> 00:22:48.920
<v Speaker 3>don't use your blinkers. I can make use one right now.

439
00:22:48.079 --> 00:22:53.279
<v Speaker 2>If you got you a camera, bitch. That's good stuff. Uh.

440
00:22:53.359 --> 00:22:57.960
<v Speaker 2>Speaking of of other news, though today more important Dome

441
00:22:59.039 --> 00:23:04.359
<v Speaker 2>Ovechkin broke Gretzky's goal record today. Wow, in in this

442
00:23:04.559 --> 00:23:09.319
<v Speaker 2>the same amount of games that it took Wayne to

443
00:23:09.359 --> 00:23:12.319
<v Speaker 2>get his mark. It took the exact same amount of

444
00:23:12.319 --> 00:23:16.880
<v Speaker 2>games for Ovi to beat Gretzki. That's pretty impressive.

445
00:23:17.559 --> 00:23:18.839
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, how many goals?

446
00:23:18.920 --> 00:23:22.559
<v Speaker 2>Is it eight hundred and ninety five in one season?

447
00:23:23.440 --> 00:23:25.400
<v Speaker 2>Or is that like career career?

448
00:23:27.000 --> 00:23:27.240
<v Speaker 3>Career?

449
00:23:27.359 --> 00:23:29.799
<v Speaker 2>But Ovechkin is thirty nine years old.

450
00:23:30.000 --> 00:23:31.559
<v Speaker 3>He's gonna throw his.

451
00:23:31.680 --> 00:23:35.039
<v Speaker 2>Leg this year, and they expected him to miss two

452
00:23:35.079 --> 00:23:38.200
<v Speaker 2>to three months. He was out for five weeks and

453
00:23:38.240 --> 00:23:40.960
<v Speaker 2>he was back in scored the first game he was back.

454
00:23:42.359 --> 00:23:45.559
<v Speaker 2>That was Stone's watch. That was my machine. There don't

455
00:23:45.599 --> 00:23:46.480
<v Speaker 2>if you're wondering.

456
00:23:46.200 --> 00:23:50.359
<v Speaker 3>If domes over like, am I tripping Graham stocking to this?

457
00:23:51.079 --> 00:23:55.200
<v Speaker 2>But yeah, he uh, he came back from the broken leg.

458
00:23:55.599 --> 00:23:59.480
<v Speaker 2>He also scored. He holds the record now also for

459
00:23:59.640 --> 00:24:05.319
<v Speaker 2>most forty goal seasons in a career, which is impressive. Yeah, yeah,

460
00:24:05.359 --> 00:24:10.799
<v Speaker 2>which is impressive. Forty or more goals in fourteen or

461
00:24:10.880 --> 00:24:14.559
<v Speaker 2>fifteen years out of his twenty that's wild. And the

462
00:24:14.599 --> 00:24:17.440
<v Speaker 2>only the only years he got short were Lockhowt years,

463
00:24:18.079 --> 00:24:20.160
<v Speaker 2>which is not he dealt.

464
00:24:20.200 --> 00:24:24.039
<v Speaker 5>He dealt with multiple issues where they had shortened seasons

465
00:24:24.160 --> 00:24:27.720
<v Speaker 5>by a decent amount, you know. And so for him

466
00:24:27.720 --> 00:24:32.839
<v Speaker 5>to have this record in this fashion, it speaks volumes, man,

467
00:24:33.960 --> 00:24:37.039
<v Speaker 5>it really does. And I have to give Gretzky a

468
00:24:37.039 --> 00:24:39.400
<v Speaker 5>lot of credit because he you know, he was humble

469
00:24:39.440 --> 00:24:42.079
<v Speaker 5>about it. He said, good on him, good job, proud

470
00:24:42.079 --> 00:24:45.079
<v Speaker 5>of him. Now let's see if he gets my assist goal,

471
00:24:45.240 --> 00:24:48.640
<v Speaker 5>my assist record. That'll never happen, he he goes.

472
00:24:49.400 --> 00:24:51.920
<v Speaker 2>Because Gretzky. While Gretzky cared about.

473
00:24:51.680 --> 00:24:56.160
<v Speaker 5>The overall like the total goals scored he did, that's

474
00:24:56.200 --> 00:24:56.960
<v Speaker 5>not the one that he.

475
00:24:56.880 --> 00:24:59.920
<v Speaker 2>Was most proud of. The real assist.

476
00:25:00.119 --> 00:25:02.960
<v Speaker 5>The assists is what Gretzky is the most proud of

477
00:25:03.079 --> 00:25:06.559
<v Speaker 5>in his career, and that's been documented wide.

478
00:25:07.480 --> 00:25:10.640
<v Speaker 2>Well, because that's an assist is a true team player, correct,

479
00:25:10.720 --> 00:25:14.839
<v Speaker 2>You're helping somebody else score. Correct. So the fact that

480
00:25:14.920 --> 00:25:19.359
<v Speaker 2>he held both scoring title and assist title. Yeah, like

481
00:25:19.400 --> 00:25:21.519
<v Speaker 2>total because you get a point for an assist, right

482
00:25:22.359 --> 00:25:25.599
<v Speaker 2>like here he goes stoned. This is this is what's crazy.

483
00:25:29.400 --> 00:25:34.720
<v Speaker 2>Gretzky number one for points in a career or assist, sorry, assists,

484
00:25:36.000 --> 00:25:40.240
<v Speaker 2>He's got nineteen hundred and sixty three assists. Go ahead

485
00:25:40.279 --> 00:25:42.200
<v Speaker 2>and take a stab at who number two or not?

486
00:25:42.279 --> 00:25:45.400
<v Speaker 2>Who number two is? How many number two has? Twelve

487
00:25:45.480 --> 00:25:51.000
<v Speaker 2>hundred Yeah, twelve forty nine? Yeah. Wild? His goals and

488
00:25:51.039 --> 00:25:56.720
<v Speaker 2>his assists make him eleven hundred points higher total than

489
00:25:56.759 --> 00:25:59.319
<v Speaker 2>the next closest person in member points. Virture.

490
00:25:59.759 --> 00:26:00.640
<v Speaker 3>That's wild.

491
00:26:00.759 --> 00:26:01.640
<v Speaker 2>It'll never get touched.

492
00:26:01.640 --> 00:26:05.799
<v Speaker 5>And it's crazy because I keep seeing people online, these

493
00:26:05.799 --> 00:26:08.960
<v Speaker 5>little keyboard warriors are like, oh, well, Gretzky did it

494
00:26:09.000 --> 00:26:11.759
<v Speaker 5>in a time was so much easier to score goals

495
00:26:11.799 --> 00:26:12.720
<v Speaker 5>and get goals.

496
00:26:13.480 --> 00:26:15.400
<v Speaker 2>I agree with that. I agree with that.

497
00:26:15.440 --> 00:26:18.599
<v Speaker 5>I actually it's bullshit. I think it's even because you

498
00:26:18.759 --> 00:26:23.359
<v Speaker 5>have an upgrade in equipment. You have listen, you have Yes,

499
00:26:23.400 --> 00:26:25.920
<v Speaker 5>you have an upgrade in equipment. I get that you

500
00:26:25.960 --> 00:26:28.640
<v Speaker 5>have an upgrade. You have an upgrade in talent, and

501
00:26:28.720 --> 00:26:31.519
<v Speaker 5>you have an upgrade in the way people train, right,

502
00:26:32.279 --> 00:26:38.759
<v Speaker 5>But that goes across the fucking board like it it's

503
00:26:38.839 --> 00:26:39.599
<v Speaker 5>not hot.

504
00:26:39.759 --> 00:26:43.160
<v Speaker 2>My only argument, I don't take anything away from Gretzky

505
00:26:43.440 --> 00:26:46.440
<v Speaker 2>and his record, like it's it stood the test, you know,

506
00:26:46.519 --> 00:26:49.319
<v Speaker 2>thirty one years for that, and his assist record, I

507
00:26:49.319 --> 00:26:51.400
<v Speaker 2>don't think. I think the only person that has a

508
00:26:51.519 --> 00:26:55.519
<v Speaker 2>legitimate shot to hit the assist would be Connor McDavid

509
00:26:55.559 --> 00:26:57.559
<v Speaker 2>if he plays until he's like forty or forty one.

510
00:26:57.720 --> 00:27:00.519
<v Speaker 2>But yeah, I think he's got a healthy law career,

511
00:27:00.839 --> 00:27:03.880
<v Speaker 2>That's what I'm saying, right, so he's the only one

512
00:27:03.880 --> 00:27:07.759
<v Speaker 2>that would have a shot at that. However, when it

513
00:27:07.799 --> 00:27:11.960
<v Speaker 2>comes to that, as far as old school, the only

514
00:27:12.000 --> 00:27:14.599
<v Speaker 2>thing I say about that is the goalies. The goalies

515
00:27:14.640 --> 00:27:17.799
<v Speaker 2>nowadays are so much better, but they also have so

516
00:27:17.920 --> 00:27:20.160
<v Speaker 2>much more equipment and take up more of the net.

517
00:27:20.559 --> 00:27:23.000
<v Speaker 2>Look at how much Look at how wide that net

518
00:27:23.240 --> 00:27:25.759
<v Speaker 2>was back in the day. They if you look back,

519
00:27:25.759 --> 00:27:28.279
<v Speaker 2>you're like, were the nets bigger than they are today? No,

520
00:27:28.319 --> 00:27:32.079
<v Speaker 2>it's because the goalies were. The pattings were smaller, and

521
00:27:32.119 --> 00:27:33.680
<v Speaker 2>they they just weren't as good as what.

522
00:27:33.640 --> 00:27:34.119
<v Speaker 3>They are now.

523
00:27:34.680 --> 00:27:37.599
<v Speaker 5>True, and I do concede that, but I don't think

524
00:27:37.640 --> 00:27:42.240
<v Speaker 5>it's so wide of a margin between one era and

525
00:27:42.319 --> 00:27:45.240
<v Speaker 5>another to really say.

526
00:27:44.920 --> 00:27:47.240
<v Speaker 2>That, No, Gretzky was a generational talent.

527
00:27:47.279 --> 00:27:49.920
<v Speaker 5>Exactly, he was to take anything away, and that's what

528
00:27:49.960 --> 00:27:52.079
<v Speaker 5>that's what these people are doing online. That's what these

529
00:27:52.160 --> 00:27:56.920
<v Speaker 5>young individuals who never got to watch Gretzky live are saying.

530
00:27:56.960 --> 00:27:59.759
<v Speaker 5>They're saying that Gretzky just he was a product of

531
00:27:59.799 --> 00:28:01.680
<v Speaker 5>the era. He was a product of the era. No,

532
00:28:01.799 --> 00:28:03.960
<v Speaker 5>he wasn't, absolutely not.

533
00:28:04.519 --> 00:28:06.079
<v Speaker 2>He was way ahead of his time.

534
00:28:06.720 --> 00:28:09.440
<v Speaker 5>If you put if you put Gretzky in his prime

535
00:28:10.559 --> 00:28:14.319
<v Speaker 5>in today, in today's actual game, it'd be.

536
00:28:14.240 --> 00:28:16.119
<v Speaker 2>The same result. I agree.

537
00:28:16.240 --> 00:28:18.039
<v Speaker 5>I think it would be the exact same result. I

538
00:28:18.079 --> 00:28:20.440
<v Speaker 5>don't think it would change. I think I think the

539
00:28:20.440 --> 00:28:22.599
<v Speaker 5>the numbers would be the same. I think the style

540
00:28:22.640 --> 00:28:25.799
<v Speaker 5>would be the same. He would end up having everything

541
00:28:25.839 --> 00:28:28.960
<v Speaker 5>he already had. I don't think it would be anymore

542
00:28:29.000 --> 00:28:32.319
<v Speaker 5>or any less. That's just because that's who he was.

543
00:28:34.000 --> 00:28:36.400
<v Speaker 2>I think that's fair. I mean, the same argument is

544
00:28:36.519 --> 00:28:39.799
<v Speaker 2>against people with Ovechkin is like, well, he just he

545
00:28:39.880 --> 00:28:42.279
<v Speaker 2>shoots in the later part of his career, he shoots

546
00:28:42.279 --> 00:28:45.559
<v Speaker 2>from like one area. You know it's coming, but you

547
00:28:45.640 --> 00:28:48.279
<v Speaker 2>can't stop it. Then stop it exactly, you know, you

548
00:28:48.400 --> 00:28:50.400
<v Speaker 2>know it's coming, yeah, and you still can't stop it.

549
00:28:50.440 --> 00:28:53.319
<v Speaker 2>There was this goal today was exactly in the same area,

550
00:28:53.480 --> 00:28:56.920
<v Speaker 2>same spot when he tied the record yesterday or the

551
00:28:56.960 --> 00:28:59.720
<v Speaker 2>day before, the day before, the day before, he was

552
00:29:00.240 --> 00:29:03.160
<v Speaker 2>on the power play in his circle, in his normal spot.

553
00:29:03.480 --> 00:29:05.880
<v Speaker 2>You know it's coming, yeah, and he still can't stop it.

554
00:29:05.920 --> 00:29:06.680
<v Speaker 2>There was a there.

555
00:29:06.799 --> 00:29:09.720
<v Speaker 5>There's a clip from that game where he tied the

556
00:29:09.759 --> 00:29:12.640
<v Speaker 5>record where he was going, he was going to shoot,

557
00:29:13.200 --> 00:29:15.839
<v Speaker 5>saw that he lost his opportunity and ended up just

558
00:29:15.920 --> 00:29:18.599
<v Speaker 5>circling back around the net to try and get a

559
00:29:18.599 --> 00:29:19.319
<v Speaker 5>different position.

560
00:29:19.880 --> 00:29:23.599
<v Speaker 2>It's not like OVI is stupid. He doesn't. He's not

561
00:29:23.640 --> 00:29:25.680
<v Speaker 2>just like, oh I go through here, I shoot. Oh

562
00:29:25.720 --> 00:29:28.319
<v Speaker 2>I go through here, I shoot. That's not what he does.

563
00:29:28.400 --> 00:29:31.319
<v Speaker 2>He played, He does play the game. Yes, he has

564
00:29:31.359 --> 00:29:32.200
<v Speaker 2>a favorite spot.

565
00:29:32.319 --> 00:29:36.599
<v Speaker 5>Everybody does get fucked like everybody feels comfortable with what

566
00:29:36.640 --> 00:29:40.759
<v Speaker 5>they feel comfortable with that you do it in the bedroom, loser,

567
00:29:41.920 --> 00:29:44.799
<v Speaker 5>not you, but the people listening, the two people listening.

568
00:29:44.839 --> 00:29:46.880
<v Speaker 2>How dare you assume I get something? The two people.

569
00:29:46.920 --> 00:29:48.400
<v Speaker 5>I was really talking to B Word and I was

570
00:29:49.559 --> 00:29:51.920
<v Speaker 5>the way he jerks off, it's all he's really talking about.

571
00:29:52.000 --> 00:29:54.480
<v Speaker 3>Well, I mean, B Word is getting hit on everybody's mom.

572
00:29:54.599 --> 00:29:56.319
<v Speaker 3>So he's got a lot of shit to jerk off to.

573
00:29:57.079 --> 00:30:01.119
<v Speaker 3>God damn weird getting him seventy f you're gonna have

574
00:30:01.160 --> 00:30:03.319
<v Speaker 3>to use goods, use.

575
00:30:06.720 --> 00:30:15.720
<v Speaker 2>Extremely used good pussy lips looked like a fucking boxer's

576
00:30:15.720 --> 00:30:18.559
<v Speaker 2>mouth sticking its head out the window. I love that gift, dude,

577
00:30:20.160 --> 00:30:24.839
<v Speaker 2>I absolutely love that gift. Uh, that's good stuff, all right.

578
00:30:26.000 --> 00:30:30.440
<v Speaker 2>I have something for us to do. I think we've

579
00:30:30.480 --> 00:30:33.400
<v Speaker 2>done this once on this podcast, and I just thought

580
00:30:33.400 --> 00:30:37.400
<v Speaker 2>it was fun. Uh. So I came up with a

581
00:30:37.400 --> 00:30:40.079
<v Speaker 2>couple of different things here and we're gonna do. Uh

582
00:30:40.119 --> 00:30:44.440
<v Speaker 2>whose dad is in anyway? Mm hmmm, mm hmm what

583
00:30:44.720 --> 00:30:47.759
<v Speaker 2>what the fucking sigh? Like you expected? D cups? I

584
00:30:47.799 --> 00:30:50.319
<v Speaker 2>pulled them up and they were like small bees.

585
00:30:53.440 --> 00:30:58.839
<v Speaker 3>Those aren't bees, honey an Yeah, that's.

586
00:31:00.480 --> 00:31:02.039
<v Speaker 2>Mis o.

587
00:31:02.160 --> 00:31:05.400
<v Speaker 5>Listen, I haven't got I haven't gotten anything above an

588
00:31:05.400 --> 00:31:06.119
<v Speaker 5>A minus in.

589
00:31:06.079 --> 00:31:06.759
<v Speaker 4>My entire life.

590
00:31:06.799 --> 00:31:10.920
<v Speaker 2>So oh no, we're talking.

591
00:31:10.920 --> 00:31:13.559
<v Speaker 4>We're not talking about grades on my bed.

592
00:31:16.240 --> 00:31:20.640
<v Speaker 2>Oh it's good stuff, all right. So first round that

593
00:31:20.720 --> 00:31:22.920
<v Speaker 2>I want to do with you guys. I'm gonna have

594
00:31:22.960 --> 00:31:23.440
<v Speaker 2>you guys go.

595
00:31:24.319 --> 00:31:24.440
<v Speaker 5>Uh.

596
00:31:24.599 --> 00:31:26.640
<v Speaker 2>Part of this will involve me, but some of it

597
00:31:26.680 --> 00:31:29.720
<v Speaker 2>involves just the two of you, right, So this this

598
00:31:29.799 --> 00:31:33.319
<v Speaker 2>first thing, we're gonna do a little improv for what

599
00:31:33.359 --> 00:31:35.920
<v Speaker 2>you guys are gonna say here, and things that you

600
00:31:35.960 --> 00:31:39.440
<v Speaker 2>can say about dinner but you cannot say to your spouse.

601
00:31:40.640 --> 00:31:45.079
<v Speaker 2>Things you can say about dinner about dinner, but you

602
00:31:45.119 --> 00:31:48.680
<v Speaker 2>can't say to your spouse. Dude, the ship's dry as fuck.

603
00:31:51.960 --> 00:31:56.279
<v Speaker 5>You burned it again, but I'm still gonna eat it.

604
00:31:56.359 --> 00:31:57.920
<v Speaker 3>So like, do you want me to eat with you

605
00:31:58.039 --> 00:31:59.960
<v Speaker 3>or eat with your sister? What are we doing here?

606
00:32:04.000 --> 00:32:11.000
<v Speaker 4>I really don't mind the hair that's in this, dude.

607
00:32:11.000 --> 00:32:13.599
<v Speaker 3>Your sister asked if I wanted seconds? Like, who the

608
00:32:13.640 --> 00:32:15.079
<v Speaker 3>hell made it past their first plate?

609
00:32:15.440 --> 00:32:20.559
<v Speaker 2>Jesus, is your mom coming? Or what?

610
00:32:25.200 --> 00:32:25.559
<v Speaker 3>Oh?

611
00:32:25.599 --> 00:32:30.680
<v Speaker 2>That's good stuff all right? Next one, things that you

612
00:32:30.720 --> 00:32:38.200
<v Speaker 2>can say about sports and say in bed go jets.

613
00:32:41.000 --> 00:32:43.160
<v Speaker 2>Looks like another night of masturbation for Dome.

614
00:32:47.519 --> 00:32:50.480
<v Speaker 3>Oh Jesus, a little to the left is all he

615
00:32:50.559 --> 00:32:53.839
<v Speaker 3>needs to sink it, m all.

616
00:32:53.839 --> 00:32:55.480
<v Speaker 2>He needs one more black eye on the field and

617
00:32:55.519 --> 00:33:04.079
<v Speaker 2>they'll win. This is an offensive liners is casting couch?

618
00:33:04.079 --> 00:33:04.680
<v Speaker 2>What's going on?

619
00:33:06.000 --> 00:33:07.880
<v Speaker 3>He got so close to finding it before the buzzer

620
00:33:07.920 --> 00:33:14.839
<v Speaker 3>went off. That's a good one.

621
00:33:14.880 --> 00:33:18.119
<v Speaker 2>That's a good one. That's a good one. I'll give

622
00:33:18.119 --> 00:33:19.880
<v Speaker 2>that one to you, all right. Last one of this

623
00:33:20.000 --> 00:33:23.680
<v Speaker 2>category things you can say about your car, but not

624
00:33:23.799 --> 00:33:25.720
<v Speaker 2>your girlfriend.

625
00:33:28.240 --> 00:33:29.680
<v Speaker 3>She's got a fat ass.

626
00:33:32.680 --> 00:33:39.279
<v Speaker 2>Time to trade her in. Hey, can we get new

627
00:33:39.359 --> 00:33:44.839
<v Speaker 2>airbags in this thing? Hey, honeyed up for your tires.

628
00:33:44.880 --> 00:33:45.799
<v Speaker 2>A little fat.

629
00:33:52.599 --> 00:33:54.720
<v Speaker 3>Engine goes just nice and it's all looped up.

630
00:33:56.039 --> 00:33:57.559
<v Speaker 4>How many Mexicans can we fit in this?

631
00:34:02.880 --> 00:34:07.440
<v Speaker 2>At least one?

632
00:34:08.760 --> 00:34:11.079
<v Speaker 3>I don't know about you, guys, but I think I

633
00:34:11.159 --> 00:34:22.760
<v Speaker 3>might have misfired on that one.

634
00:34:19.400 --> 00:34:25.400
<v Speaker 2>Part a little too early. Okay, that's good stuff, all right.

635
00:34:25.440 --> 00:34:27.800
<v Speaker 2>So next this is going to be the play it

636
00:34:27.840 --> 00:34:33.119
<v Speaker 2>out version of the dads whose dad is? Anyway? So Stone,

637
00:34:33.280 --> 00:34:36.519
<v Speaker 2>you in this scenario, you guys are going to do

638
00:34:36.519 --> 00:34:40.239
<v Speaker 2>a little togetherness here. Stone you're going to be an interviewer,

639
00:34:41.480 --> 00:34:43.559
<v Speaker 2>and Dome you were going to be the interviewee for

640
00:34:43.639 --> 00:34:48.159
<v Speaker 2>the job. The position is for a telemarketer, but the

641
00:34:48.199 --> 00:34:54.440
<v Speaker 2>interviewee thinks that it's just for a sandwich shop. I'll

642
00:34:54.480 --> 00:34:55.880
<v Speaker 2>leave it to you Stone, take it away.

643
00:34:56.039 --> 00:34:57.880
<v Speaker 3>Well, hello there, mister Dome, Thank you so much for

644
00:34:57.920 --> 00:35:01.119
<v Speaker 3>coming in and applying toys position. What are your relevant

645
00:35:01.199 --> 00:35:02.679
<v Speaker 3>qualifications to the position?

646
00:35:04.400 --> 00:35:11.880
<v Speaker 5>Uh, I'm really good at like customer service.

647
00:35:12.480 --> 00:35:16.840
<v Speaker 4>And I worked I worked at a subway for four years.

648
00:35:17.199 --> 00:35:17.880
<v Speaker 2>Uh, I was.

649
00:35:18.079 --> 00:35:21.800
<v Speaker 4>I was a shift manager. I was really good putting.

650
00:35:21.840 --> 00:35:24.159
<v Speaker 5>I was quick at putting together sandwiches and and and

651
00:35:24.239 --> 00:35:27.760
<v Speaker 5>handling the lines and stuff. And you know, I remember

652
00:35:27.800 --> 00:35:30.039
<v Speaker 5>all I remember all the deals and combos.

653
00:35:30.639 --> 00:35:36.880
<v Speaker 3>Still, that is fantastic. All right, sounds like you got

654
00:35:36.880 --> 00:35:40.480
<v Speaker 3>a lot of get up and go with you? All right? So, like,

655
00:35:40.519 --> 00:35:43.400
<v Speaker 3>how often do you do you talk on the phone?

656
00:35:44.320 --> 00:35:45.800
<v Speaker 4>I mean every time someone calls?

657
00:35:47.679 --> 00:35:49.880
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, all right, how how many times you get in calls?

658
00:35:51.039 --> 00:35:52.360
<v Speaker 4>I don't I don't know, man, I don't really have

659
00:35:52.360 --> 00:35:54.440
<v Speaker 4>a whole lot of friends. What does it have to do?

660
00:35:55.679 --> 00:35:59.440
<v Speaker 2>I don't know. I don't have a lot of friends either.

661
00:35:59.519 --> 00:36:03.840
<v Speaker 2>Hold on, can can I? Can I? When I go

662
00:36:03.920 --> 00:36:05.679
<v Speaker 2>to lunch? Can I eat whatever I want?

663
00:36:05.840 --> 00:36:05.920
<v Speaker 5>Like?

664
00:36:06.079 --> 00:36:07.760
<v Speaker 2>Is it all just good.

665
00:36:07.480 --> 00:36:10.320
<v Speaker 4>For me to do? You just make myself a sandwich

666
00:36:10.400 --> 00:36:10.920
<v Speaker 4>and then.

667
00:36:13.440 --> 00:36:15.639
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, you can so choose to bring whatever lunch you

668
00:36:15.679 --> 00:36:17.280
<v Speaker 3>want into the lunch room. That's why we have the

669
00:36:17.320 --> 00:36:19.119
<v Speaker 3>lunch room in the fridge there. You can even store

670
00:36:19.159 --> 00:36:21.440
<v Speaker 3>your sandwich in there while you're calling people on the phone,

671
00:36:22.199 --> 00:36:26.239
<v Speaker 3>all right, And not to cut the cheese or anything.

672
00:36:27.639 --> 00:36:29.639
<v Speaker 3>I like these little jokes and these interviews that breaks.

673
00:36:29.719 --> 00:36:30.679
<v Speaker 2>We have to have cheese.

674
00:36:30.920 --> 00:36:32.800
<v Speaker 4>We never used to have to cut the cheese. It

675
00:36:32.840 --> 00:36:34.199
<v Speaker 4>always used to come pre sliced.

676
00:36:35.880 --> 00:36:38.320
<v Speaker 3>It's a metaphor. It's a metaphor in our world.

677
00:36:38.440 --> 00:36:39.400
<v Speaker 2>I don't know that's right.

678
00:36:39.880 --> 00:36:41.960
<v Speaker 3>So like, how soon? How soon can you start? Do

679
00:36:42.000 --> 00:36:43.239
<v Speaker 3>you need anything for the job?

680
00:36:44.400 --> 00:36:44.519
<v Speaker 5>Well?

681
00:36:44.519 --> 00:36:48.159
<v Speaker 2>I mean my uniform? Ah?

682
00:36:48.239 --> 00:36:52.239
<v Speaker 3>Well, you know what, luckily all of your parts are uniform. However,

683
00:36:52.320 --> 00:36:55.440
<v Speaker 3>you don't have to wear one because we work from home.

684
00:36:56.519 --> 00:36:58.440
<v Speaker 2>How do you make a sandwich it home?

685
00:36:59.599 --> 00:37:02.199
<v Speaker 3>Let me tell you you were the best footy pajamas

686
00:37:02.599 --> 00:37:06.079
<v Speaker 3>there ever could be worn? Is right there? It's the best,

687
00:37:06.840 --> 00:37:09.239
<v Speaker 3>the best. Yes, door dash is available. That's the greatest

688
00:37:09.239 --> 00:37:11.039
<v Speaker 3>thing about this job is you can call people. You

689
00:37:11.039 --> 00:37:12.760
<v Speaker 3>can call door dash. They can come to your door

690
00:37:12.800 --> 00:37:15.840
<v Speaker 3>while you're calling people. It's wonderful, it's fantastic. Look, how

691
00:37:15.840 --> 00:37:17.280
<v Speaker 3>are you with your oral skills?

692
00:37:18.039 --> 00:37:19.119
<v Speaker 2>My oral skills?

693
00:37:19.320 --> 00:37:21.719
<v Speaker 5>I look, man, I'm not doing that. I don't need

694
00:37:21.760 --> 00:37:25.400
<v Speaker 5>this job that bad. I look, I just want to

695
00:37:25.400 --> 00:37:26.119
<v Speaker 5>make sandwiches.

696
00:37:26.960 --> 00:37:29.920
<v Speaker 3>I figured your oral skills and also your comprehension skills

697
00:37:29.960 --> 00:37:32.199
<v Speaker 3>working with subs all day would be actually pretty good

698
00:37:32.239 --> 00:37:33.679
<v Speaker 3>to ask about the old skills.

699
00:37:33.719 --> 00:37:36.559
<v Speaker 5>Dude. I've never really been that great at math. I'm

700
00:37:36.599 --> 00:37:39.880
<v Speaker 5>not the comprehension thing. What I stopped at geometry?

701
00:37:40.079 --> 00:37:42.840
<v Speaker 3>Dude, You've got to have some great oral skills to

702
00:37:42.880 --> 00:37:46.079
<v Speaker 3>handle those six inches and twelve inches? Am I right?

703
00:37:47.400 --> 00:37:49.440
<v Speaker 5>That's an HR approved joke. By the way, it's okay,

704
00:37:49.440 --> 00:37:51.960
<v Speaker 5>it's HR proof we're good. You can ask Tom Tom

705
00:37:52.039 --> 00:37:54.000
<v Speaker 5>on the way out. He's the one who drives the beamer,

706
00:37:54.039 --> 00:37:57.400
<v Speaker 5>although don't count his golf drive. It sucks.

707
00:37:57.440 --> 00:38:00.000
<v Speaker 2>So you are you asking me to get under your desk?

708
00:38:01.920 --> 00:38:04.119
<v Speaker 3>You don't even need a desk. We provide one for you.

709
00:38:04.199 --> 00:38:07.159
<v Speaker 3>It's wonderful, baby, it is great. I think you would

710
00:38:07.199 --> 00:38:09.159
<v Speaker 3>be the best fit for this hire, to be honest

711
00:38:09.199 --> 00:38:12.360
<v Speaker 3>with you, Jerome Dome, that's right, Dome, I almost forgot

712
00:38:12.360 --> 00:38:14.960
<v Speaker 3>you in there for a second. My bad. All right,

713
00:38:15.239 --> 00:38:17.039
<v Speaker 3>So when can you start? Do you h Do you

714
00:38:17.079 --> 00:38:19.000
<v Speaker 3>need to go ahead and pick up anything? Do you

715
00:38:19.000 --> 00:38:19.480
<v Speaker 3>have internet?

716
00:38:19.559 --> 00:38:19.719
<v Speaker 5>You know?

717
00:38:19.760 --> 00:38:20.199
<v Speaker 3>And all that?

718
00:38:20.599 --> 00:38:20.920
<v Speaker 5>Sure?

719
00:38:23.599 --> 00:38:25.119
<v Speaker 2>Cool? All right?

720
00:38:25.960 --> 00:38:27.559
<v Speaker 3>That's all we need for this job really is just

721
00:38:27.559 --> 00:38:28.960
<v Speaker 3>the internet. You just got to be able to look

722
00:38:29.000 --> 00:38:32.159
<v Speaker 3>up stuff, you know and get the formulas and recipes

723
00:38:32.199 --> 00:38:35.760
<v Speaker 3>you know, as they say in the chef world of Subway.

724
00:38:36.000 --> 00:38:39.400
<v Speaker 3>You know, yeah, so.

725
00:38:39.360 --> 00:38:42.199
<v Speaker 2>Do I get it? Can I have? Can I just

726
00:38:42.239 --> 00:38:42.960
<v Speaker 2>have some cookies?

727
00:38:44.639 --> 00:38:47.119
<v Speaker 3>I mean we have plenty of cookies. You know, all

728
00:38:47.119 --> 00:38:49.320
<v Speaker 3>the vendor sites ask you about the cookies if you

729
00:38:49.360 --> 00:38:52.440
<v Speaker 3>accept them or reject them, and you know, we go ahead.

730
00:38:52.480 --> 00:38:54.280
<v Speaker 3>We have a firewall that blocks that ship out of there.

731
00:38:54.320 --> 00:38:57.000
<v Speaker 3>Pretty good, it's it's pretty decent, I gotta say. But

732
00:38:57.039 --> 00:38:58.719
<v Speaker 3>you can have all the cookies you want in your

733
00:38:58.760 --> 00:39:02.159
<v Speaker 3>own kitchen. It's the best. You can cook whatever in

734
00:39:02.199 --> 00:39:05.719
<v Speaker 3>there too. Your headset is portable and wireless. Have you

735
00:39:05.719 --> 00:39:07.159
<v Speaker 3>ever had a wireless headset before?

736
00:39:07.320 --> 00:39:12.400
<v Speaker 5>You have ovens at the store? Like, yeah, usually the

737
00:39:12.440 --> 00:39:14.199
<v Speaker 5>cookies before I come into work.

738
00:39:14.280 --> 00:39:16.480
<v Speaker 2>Man, Do I get paid for that? As at overtime?

739
00:39:17.320 --> 00:39:19.280
<v Speaker 3>I mean, you know, boss makes a dollar, I make

740
00:39:19.320 --> 00:39:22.119
<v Speaker 3>a die. And that's why I insert here in company time.

741
00:39:22.280 --> 00:39:24.440
<v Speaker 3>You know what I'm saying. You know, as long as

742
00:39:24.480 --> 00:39:27.440
<v Speaker 3>your metrics are good, nobody has to see what you do. Baby,

743
00:39:28.639 --> 00:39:29.480
<v Speaker 3>it's so good.

744
00:39:29.599 --> 00:39:31.599
<v Speaker 2>If you wink at me like that one more time.

745
00:39:34.679 --> 00:39:37.079
<v Speaker 3>You're gonna accept the job, well, then I will wink

746
00:39:37.119 --> 00:39:44.079
<v Speaker 3>at you. Ah waking, All right, that's good. That's great.

747
00:39:44.199 --> 00:39:44.679
<v Speaker 5>I love it.

748
00:39:45.599 --> 00:39:48.679
<v Speaker 2>Uh all right.

749
00:39:49.679 --> 00:39:52.119
<v Speaker 5>You know it's funny because I used to have a ball,

750
00:39:52.519 --> 00:39:55.760
<v Speaker 5>not a boss, but he was a superior for another

751
00:39:55.760 --> 00:39:58.440
<v Speaker 5>company that we worked with that we worked adjacent, and

752
00:39:58.480 --> 00:40:01.880
<v Speaker 5>so I kind of respected him like a ball, and

753
00:40:01.920 --> 00:40:03.920
<v Speaker 5>he used to tell me all the time. He's like, hey, listen,

754
00:40:03.960 --> 00:40:06.480
<v Speaker 5>every three months, you need to update your resume and

755
00:40:06.559 --> 00:40:09.519
<v Speaker 5>apply for jobs. Apply for like ten or fifteen jobs.

756
00:40:09.679 --> 00:40:13.800
<v Speaker 5>It doesn't matter what the job is Walmart, McDonald's, it

757
00:40:13.840 --> 00:40:16.360
<v Speaker 5>doesn't matter. Just apply for a bunch of jobs. So

758
00:40:16.440 --> 00:40:21.360
<v Speaker 5>you get into the habit of understanding what interviews are

759
00:40:21.480 --> 00:40:24.440
<v Speaker 5>doing these days, and you stay fresh just in case

760
00:40:24.519 --> 00:40:25.280
<v Speaker 5>you ever need it.

761
00:40:26.400 --> 00:40:28.000
<v Speaker 2>I think I might go back and do that just

762
00:40:28.000 --> 00:40:29.000
<v Speaker 2>for shits and giggles.

763
00:40:29.079 --> 00:40:31.960
<v Speaker 5>Is just like this next month or so, apply for

764
00:40:32.000 --> 00:40:34.920
<v Speaker 5>a fuck ton of jobs just to get interviews. Yeah,

765
00:40:35.000 --> 00:40:36.880
<v Speaker 5>just to get interviews and just go funnail.

766
00:40:37.199 --> 00:40:38.639
<v Speaker 2>But you don't accept any position.

767
00:40:39.159 --> 00:40:41.360
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, yeah, just go fuck around like some of them.

768
00:40:41.440 --> 00:40:46.239
<v Speaker 5>Just absolutely like trash them. Just go in completely obliterated

769
00:40:46.320 --> 00:40:47.119
<v Speaker 5>and be like all right.

770
00:40:49.239 --> 00:40:53.079
<v Speaker 2>He gets an interview with Jimmy John's, He's like, first question,

771
00:40:53.559 --> 00:40:56.039
<v Speaker 2>do I have to wear a hairnet? Or am I exempt?

772
00:40:56.320 --> 00:40:56.639
<v Speaker 5>Yeah?

773
00:40:56.960 --> 00:40:59.199
<v Speaker 3>Second question, is it kosher?

774
00:41:01.880 --> 00:41:09.599
<v Speaker 5>Do you allow inner inner company relations? If I come

775
00:41:09.679 --> 00:41:11.280
<v Speaker 5>on a sandwich.

776
00:41:10.960 --> 00:41:13.599
<v Speaker 2>Because that girl looks like Christina Ricci from swedeny Allo

777
00:41:13.960 --> 00:41:15.360
<v Speaker 2>and I'm hard as a fucking rock.

778
00:41:17.360 --> 00:41:20.360
<v Speaker 5>Spend sixteen years since I had sex in one of

779
00:41:20.360 --> 00:41:22.960
<v Speaker 5>your freezers.

780
00:41:23.360 --> 00:41:32.280
<v Speaker 2>I'm due, Okay. Next scenario, Dome you are the coach

781
00:41:33.199 --> 00:41:37.000
<v Speaker 2>and Stone you are the player. Is a basketball game,

782
00:41:37.639 --> 00:41:41.400
<v Speaker 2>ten seconds left, game on the line. Stone is your MVP,

783
00:41:42.400 --> 00:41:44.400
<v Speaker 2>and you took a time out because he all of

784
00:41:44.400 --> 00:41:47.400
<v Speaker 2>a sudden forgot how to play basketball, and you need

785
00:41:47.400 --> 00:41:50.920
<v Speaker 2>to coach him through this. Ten seconds left, ten seconds

786
00:41:50.960 --> 00:41:55.760
<v Speaker 2>in the game, down by ill one one, he if

787
00:41:55.760 --> 00:41:59.480
<v Speaker 2>he scores you down by one, put it that way.

788
00:41:59.679 --> 00:42:02.480
<v Speaker 2>Take that ten seconds left, down by one. Stone is

789
00:42:02.480 --> 00:42:04.519
<v Speaker 2>the MVP, but you forgot how to play basketball. You're

790
00:42:04.559 --> 00:42:06.559
<v Speaker 2>the coach. Take it away, coach.

791
00:42:07.159 --> 00:42:09.320
<v Speaker 5>All right, Stone, listen, here's what we're gonna do. We're

792
00:42:09.320 --> 00:42:11.480
<v Speaker 5>gonna inbound the ball. Where are you at real quick,

793
00:42:11.880 --> 00:42:15.400
<v Speaker 5>I'm right in front of you, yeah, Stone, right in

794
00:42:15.400 --> 00:42:15.960
<v Speaker 5>front of you.

795
00:42:15.960 --> 00:42:17.840
<v Speaker 2>Look down. You gotta put you bring it down.

796
00:42:17.920 --> 00:42:20.400
<v Speaker 5>Oh right, listen, I thought you were like a coke

797
00:42:20.440 --> 00:42:23.800
<v Speaker 5>cup or something. I understand, I understand, it's listening. It's

798
00:42:23.800 --> 00:42:24.760
<v Speaker 5>hot in here, it's sweaty.

799
00:42:24.800 --> 00:42:25.280
<v Speaker 2>We get it.

800
00:42:25.320 --> 00:42:28.199
<v Speaker 5>Listen, Hey, you played, You've played forty five hard minutes. There,

801
00:42:28.239 --> 00:42:30.320
<v Speaker 5>young man, let's get on. Hey, back down.

802
00:42:30.239 --> 00:42:32.239
<v Speaker 3>Here, go to forty five minutes to save my life.

803
00:42:32.320 --> 00:42:32.679
<v Speaker 2>Down here.

804
00:42:32.719 --> 00:42:34.400
<v Speaker 3>My girlfriend says, I'm averaging three and a half.

805
00:42:34.679 --> 00:42:37.000
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, your girlfriend's also averaging three and a half guys

806
00:42:37.000 --> 00:42:37.719
<v Speaker 5>on the football team.

807
00:42:37.760 --> 00:42:39.480
<v Speaker 2>But we're not talking about that right now, are we.

808
00:42:39.599 --> 00:42:39.960
<v Speaker 2>All right?

809
00:42:40.039 --> 00:42:41.440
<v Speaker 3>We were in therapy about that.

810
00:42:41.440 --> 00:42:42.400
<v Speaker 2>We're focused right here.

811
00:42:42.440 --> 00:42:44.480
<v Speaker 5>Hey, we shouldn't bring that up because it's my trigger,

812
00:42:46.159 --> 00:42:49.639
<v Speaker 5>my trigger. You shouldn't listen, coach. If this for us,

813
00:42:49.719 --> 00:42:50.960
<v Speaker 5>you're gonna see my third quarter.

814
00:42:50.960 --> 00:42:52.440
<v Speaker 3>It's starting to hit right now. I don't know where

815
00:42:52.480 --> 00:42:53.519
<v Speaker 3>I am, to be honest.

816
00:42:53.280 --> 00:42:55.519
<v Speaker 5>With you, Okay, stoned, listen, do you want to get

817
00:42:55.519 --> 00:42:56.960
<v Speaker 5>benched for the rest of your life?

818
00:42:58.239 --> 00:42:58.400
<v Speaker 2>Huh?

819
00:42:58.440 --> 00:43:00.880
<v Speaker 3>I could bench. I'm in the gym in a while.

820
00:43:00.719 --> 00:43:02.519
<v Speaker 2>Though, No, you clearly have not.

821
00:43:02.679 --> 00:43:06.360
<v Speaker 5>That's why we're in this position right now, Okay, because

822
00:43:06.400 --> 00:43:07.320
<v Speaker 5>you haven't been in the gym.

823
00:43:08.400 --> 00:43:10.039
<v Speaker 3>Missionary, coach, I go to b yu.

824
00:43:10.239 --> 00:43:15.519
<v Speaker 5>Listen, hey, listen, we're not soaking, all right, We're not

825
00:43:15.559 --> 00:43:17.800
<v Speaker 5>doing any of the soaking ship, none of the jumping.

826
00:43:18.079 --> 00:43:20.159
<v Speaker 5>All right, I'm not gonna help you with that again.

827
00:43:20.400 --> 00:43:22.360
<v Speaker 5>All right, to listen. What we're gonna do. So we're

828
00:43:22.360 --> 00:43:27.119
<v Speaker 5>gonna bound the ball to you. We're gonna run a screen. Yes,

829
00:43:27.239 --> 00:43:30.199
<v Speaker 5>I could come back to if you hit, I'll give

830
00:43:30.239 --> 00:43:31.920
<v Speaker 5>you a Listen.

831
00:43:31.960 --> 00:43:34.480
<v Speaker 2>You gotta focus. Rein it in, but rein it in. Listen.

832
00:43:34.519 --> 00:43:36.280
<v Speaker 3>Do you think I could have a fucking ten.

833
00:43:36.679 --> 00:43:39.519
<v Speaker 5>Six cheerleaders looking at you on the sidelines, But you

834
00:43:39.679 --> 00:43:41.320
<v Speaker 5>can have them all if all you gotta do is

835
00:43:41.360 --> 00:43:42.159
<v Speaker 5>just make one shot?

836
00:43:42.320 --> 00:43:44.480
<v Speaker 3>Listen, coach, why aren't there another nine?

837
00:43:44.639 --> 00:43:45.599
<v Speaker 2>We got sixteen?

838
00:43:45.719 --> 00:43:48.679
<v Speaker 5>We're not talking about ovens and nine's. We're not going

839
00:43:48.719 --> 00:43:51.800
<v Speaker 5>into Germany today, but listen, that class is next week.

840
00:43:51.840 --> 00:43:55.599
<v Speaker 5>You'll worry about it then today right now, you gotta

841
00:43:55.639 --> 00:43:59.760
<v Speaker 5>be here German. Yeah, yeah, I'll give you my broad

842
00:43:59.800 --> 00:44:01.039
<v Speaker 5>words if you fucking.

843
00:44:00.719 --> 00:44:05.199
<v Speaker 3>Make this shot, all right, it depends.

844
00:44:06.679 --> 00:44:15.800
<v Speaker 2>We're done. Sit down, Jordan, let's go miss the shot.

845
00:44:15.800 --> 00:44:17.599
<v Speaker 2>He's missing. He's missing were.

846
00:44:19.679 --> 00:44:25.039
<v Speaker 3>Somehow, somehow he hit the nun in third row and

847
00:44:25.159 --> 00:44:27.400
<v Speaker 3>completely missed the backboard which was behind him.

848
00:44:27.599 --> 00:44:30.039
<v Speaker 5>That's a terrible one for me, because listen, I'm not

849
00:44:30.119 --> 00:44:33.440
<v Speaker 5>afraid I'm not afraid to sit down a fucking eight

850
00:44:33.480 --> 00:44:35.519
<v Speaker 5>year old kid in pee wee football just to win

851
00:44:35.559 --> 00:44:35.880
<v Speaker 5>a game.

852
00:44:35.920 --> 00:44:38.119
<v Speaker 2>Like, listen to you, a little bitch, you mean crying

853
00:44:38.159 --> 00:44:42.039
<v Speaker 2>all game? All right? First, we're done. We're here to

854
00:44:42.119 --> 00:44:43.639
<v Speaker 2>win or we here trophies.

855
00:44:44.800 --> 00:44:47.719
<v Speaker 5>I'm here to teach winners. All right, we don't get

856
00:44:47.760 --> 00:44:49.079
<v Speaker 5>participation trophies.

857
00:44:49.639 --> 00:44:50.159
<v Speaker 2>Sit down.

858
00:44:51.480 --> 00:44:54.800
<v Speaker 3>Mm hmm okay, real winners.

859
00:44:56.000 --> 00:44:59.000
<v Speaker 2>Last one of this scenario is it's a speed date

860
00:44:59.480 --> 00:45:01.199
<v Speaker 2>and you two you ended up at the same table,

861
00:45:01.840 --> 00:45:03.960
<v Speaker 2>and I need you guys to think of a strange

862
00:45:04.000 --> 00:45:06.800
<v Speaker 2>character or personality you want to play and play as

863
00:45:06.840 --> 00:45:10.159
<v Speaker 2>that character during the next We'll call it two minutes,

864
00:45:10.159 --> 00:45:11.679
<v Speaker 2>and I'll set a timer, and you guys have to

865
00:45:11.719 --> 00:45:12.840
<v Speaker 2>speed date with each other.

866
00:45:13.920 --> 00:45:17.119
<v Speaker 4>You guys, ready, yeah, who I'm me to be the

867
00:45:17.159 --> 00:45:17.920
<v Speaker 4>guy or the girl.

868
00:45:18.679 --> 00:45:20.280
<v Speaker 2>You guys can be whatever you want to be.

869
00:45:21.320 --> 00:45:23.280
<v Speaker 3>You be the guy, all right?

870
00:45:23.440 --> 00:45:26.400
<v Speaker 2>Perfect? All right? Uh, and you guys sit down and

871
00:45:26.519 --> 00:45:34.400
<v Speaker 2>here's your drinks. Go. Why hello there, Chad girl.

872
00:45:34.440 --> 00:45:38.760
<v Speaker 3>This is Chadelia April to zero, firmly known as Chad

873
00:45:38.840 --> 00:45:41.360
<v Speaker 3>April to zero. But you know it's twenty twenty five

874
00:45:41.440 --> 00:45:44.760
<v Speaker 3>and I can be whoever I want bruh, chih did.

875
00:45:44.599 --> 00:45:49.760
<v Speaker 5>You say Chad Dahlia? Oh my, what an amazing name.

876
00:45:50.880 --> 00:45:52.000
<v Speaker 5>And your eyes are.

877
00:45:53.440 --> 00:45:57.519
<v Speaker 3>Mysterious super red right like a totally like hit a

878
00:45:57.559 --> 00:45:59.800
<v Speaker 3>fucking dabber in the parking lot on the way here,

879
00:46:00.639 --> 00:46:05.400
<v Speaker 3>like it was pretty cool, you know? No, No, I

880
00:46:05.440 --> 00:46:07.239
<v Speaker 3>don't so like do you ever dab like?

881
00:46:08.039 --> 00:46:08.239
<v Speaker 2>Mister?

882
00:46:11.079 --> 00:46:11.360
<v Speaker 1>Yeah?

883
00:46:11.559 --> 00:46:11.719
<v Speaker 2>Oh?

884
00:46:11.760 --> 00:46:13.119
<v Speaker 5>I love them. When I smell in the middle of

885
00:46:13.159 --> 00:46:16.639
<v Speaker 5>my arm pits, it's fantastic. Can I smell yours?

886
00:46:18.039 --> 00:46:20.159
<v Speaker 3>No, bro, the only like pits I got for you,

887
00:46:20.320 --> 00:46:23.000
<v Speaker 3>or like the avocado pits from my guacamoalia made. I'm

888
00:46:23.000 --> 00:46:26.079
<v Speaker 3>like lunchtime. But like, have you ever been to like you?

889
00:46:28.800 --> 00:46:31.119
<v Speaker 3>I'm sure I can on command if I went to

890
00:46:31.239 --> 00:46:32.840
<v Speaker 3>like a certain convention. I don't know.

891
00:46:33.159 --> 00:46:35.239
<v Speaker 2>Okay, what is a convention?

892
00:46:35.320 --> 00:46:37.719
<v Speaker 4>I've never That sounds unconventional.

893
00:46:40.079 --> 00:46:42.679
<v Speaker 3>Wow, that's like really deep.

894
00:46:43.440 --> 00:46:46.639
<v Speaker 2>Hey girl, I got a question. You got a four

895
00:46:46.639 --> 00:46:50.159
<v Speaker 2>to one k uh?

896
00:46:50.559 --> 00:46:52.639
<v Speaker 3>It depends on how much is in my bank account.

897
00:46:52.639 --> 00:46:55.599
<v Speaker 3>But once it hits for when I can be like, okay, sir,

898
00:46:56.639 --> 00:46:58.360
<v Speaker 3>is that that's perfect?

899
00:47:00.159 --> 00:47:01.519
<v Speaker 5>Yeah?

900
00:47:02.000 --> 00:47:03.079
<v Speaker 2>What kind of couch you got?

901
00:47:03.119 --> 00:47:03.400
<v Speaker 5>Girl?

902
00:47:04.079 --> 00:47:05.079
<v Speaker 4>What kind of count you got?

903
00:47:05.079 --> 00:47:05.920
<v Speaker 2>Girl? Is it long?

904
00:47:05.960 --> 00:47:08.159
<v Speaker 5>Because you know I'm six foot tall, so when I

905
00:47:08.199 --> 00:47:10.159
<v Speaker 5>stretch out on that couch, I want to make sure.

906
00:47:11.800 --> 00:47:17.239
<v Speaker 2>Don't hang over the edge. Excuse me, Uh, it's time

907
00:47:17.239 --> 00:47:21.239
<v Speaker 2>to switch guys. Sorry gals, Is that a fucking chick?

908
00:47:21.639 --> 00:47:21.679
<v Speaker 8>What?

909
00:47:22.519 --> 00:47:31.400
<v Speaker 2>I don't barge your fuck? Uh? That voice scares the

910
00:47:31.400 --> 00:47:31.960
<v Speaker 2>ship out of me.

911
00:47:35.440 --> 00:47:37.719
<v Speaker 4>I can feel that voice on the back of my neck.

912
00:47:45.880 --> 00:47:50.360
<v Speaker 2>Biscuit. You see that bar soap over there.

913
00:47:50.440 --> 00:47:55.719
<v Speaker 3>Boy, it almost sounds like Freddy Krueger, like an octave lower,

914
00:47:57.800 --> 00:47:59.000
<v Speaker 3>like a black Freddy Krueger.

915
00:47:59.119 --> 00:48:01.039
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I'm coming to.

916
00:48:04.880 --> 00:48:06.519
<v Speaker 3>Now, that's what it sounds like.

917
00:48:06.920 --> 00:48:15.400
<v Speaker 2>Ready, okay, all right, I want to get through these

918
00:48:15.480 --> 00:48:17.599
<v Speaker 2>last couple here that these are because I think these

919
00:48:17.599 --> 00:48:20.360
<v Speaker 2>will be funny here. So this is I titled this

920
00:48:20.400 --> 00:48:23.480
<v Speaker 2>one motor boats, so this is sound effects.

921
00:48:23.239 --> 00:48:25.519
<v Speaker 4>God, and I was hoping I get to motor boat him.

922
00:48:26.039 --> 00:48:28.639
<v Speaker 2>I know, well, it's just a title of thing. So

923
00:48:28.639 --> 00:48:30.199
<v Speaker 2>the first stoned.

924
00:48:31.079 --> 00:48:33.679
<v Speaker 5>Real quick, Speaking of motor boats, do you remember when

925
00:48:33.719 --> 00:48:36.039
<v Speaker 5>you were a kid, you thought that motor boat and

926
00:48:36.199 --> 00:48:39.119
<v Speaker 5>was like the best thing in the fucking world, and

927
00:48:39.159 --> 00:48:41.079
<v Speaker 5>like that's what you wanted to do. You ever think that,

928
00:48:41.320 --> 00:48:43.719
<v Speaker 5>like that's that's exactly what you wanted to do to

929
00:48:43.760 --> 00:48:44.119
<v Speaker 5>a woman?

930
00:48:44.280 --> 00:48:45.639
<v Speaker 2>Was just motor boat out of.

931
00:48:45.639 --> 00:48:48.760
<v Speaker 3>Her titties like middle school. Yeah, when you're like looking

932
00:48:48.800 --> 00:48:52.639
<v Speaker 3>at porn and you're like, dude, fucking ultimate. Right there, man,

933
00:48:53.159 --> 00:48:56.679
<v Speaker 3>we go get some more fucking mountain dune watch that ship.

934
00:48:58.400 --> 00:49:01.360
<v Speaker 5>I know I have zero desire to do that. I

935
00:49:01.400 --> 00:49:06.840
<v Speaker 5>want to do so many different things. Motor boat is

936
00:49:06.920 --> 00:49:09.880
<v Speaker 5>not it? Am I wrong?

937
00:49:10.440 --> 00:49:13.159
<v Speaker 2>Do you? Well? Can we can we sidebar that?

938
00:49:13.239 --> 00:49:13.519
<v Speaker 5>All right?

939
00:49:15.519 --> 00:49:17.239
<v Speaker 2>What's one thing you really want to do?

940
00:49:18.320 --> 00:49:18.559
<v Speaker 3>Yeah?

941
00:49:22.000 --> 00:49:24.400
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, you you clearly said there's a lot of things

942
00:49:24.400 --> 00:49:31.079
<v Speaker 2>I really want to do, So like, what's one? Not

943
00:49:31.239 --> 00:49:31.760
<v Speaker 2>number one?

944
00:49:31.880 --> 00:49:35.199
<v Speaker 3>Just one? We all need to know, man, what you doing?

945
00:49:35.320 --> 00:49:35.639
<v Speaker 2>Listen.

946
00:49:36.480 --> 00:49:39.760
<v Speaker 5>We can get into that at a different podcast. That's

947
00:49:39.760 --> 00:49:41.960
<v Speaker 5>not why I opened up this conversation was not to

948
00:49:42.000 --> 00:49:43.440
<v Speaker 5>talk about something.

949
00:49:45.119 --> 00:49:53.199
<v Speaker 2>All right, all right, well whatever, Okay, we'll get back

950
00:49:53.239 --> 00:49:55.840
<v Speaker 2>to the business at hand. All right, So Stone, you're

951
00:49:55.920 --> 00:49:59.360
<v Speaker 2>driving to your local sandwich shop. You're going to give

952
00:49:59.400 --> 00:50:02.000
<v Speaker 2>play by play your drive and Dome you were his

953
00:50:02.199 --> 00:50:05.400
<v Speaker 2>geo metro that's on its last leg and makes a

954
00:50:05.440 --> 00:50:06.719
<v Speaker 2>lot of noise during driving.

955
00:50:08.960 --> 00:50:12.239
<v Speaker 5>Alright, alright, girl, I know we've been through a lot together,

956
00:50:12.280 --> 00:50:15.800
<v Speaker 5>but goddamn we're fucking starving. We can go ahead we

957
00:50:15.840 --> 00:50:17.840
<v Speaker 5>can make it to our destination and we can make

958
00:50:17.840 --> 00:50:18.239
<v Speaker 5>it on back.

959
00:50:18.400 --> 00:50:18.960
<v Speaker 3>Is that right? Girl?

960
00:50:19.039 --> 00:50:19.559
<v Speaker 9>Part for me?

961
00:50:29.719 --> 00:50:32.400
<v Speaker 3>Goddamn girl, it brings back memories.

962
00:50:33.840 --> 00:50:35.480
<v Speaker 6>Let me go ahead and start you up real quick,

963
00:50:46.079 --> 00:50:48.159
<v Speaker 6>met like starting up like a bog.

964
00:50:50.360 --> 00:50:52.800
<v Speaker 2>I can't even with that. We rot to the next one.

965
00:50:55.960 --> 00:50:56.199
<v Speaker 3>So.

966
00:51:00.119 --> 00:51:00.880
<v Speaker 5>Tage his car.

967
00:51:02.039 --> 00:51:04.360
<v Speaker 2>The fuck is supposed so like.

968
00:51:07.960 --> 00:51:10.679
<v Speaker 3>The body Carlo and it's saying hits from the bung.

969
00:51:11.960 --> 00:51:19.760
<v Speaker 2>Oh god, it was the yam on. Let's go chose

970
00:51:19.800 --> 00:51:22.559
<v Speaker 2>the ball, shut the ball.

971
00:51:25.480 --> 00:51:31.320
<v Speaker 3>Oh god, all right, I'm just righting the high for this.

972
00:51:32.400 --> 00:51:36.920
<v Speaker 2>Okay, next one, Dome, you were laying in bed winding down,

973
00:51:36.960 --> 00:51:39.480
<v Speaker 2>trying to watch your favorite TV show. You can give

974
00:51:39.519 --> 00:51:41.719
<v Speaker 2>us a play by play of you trying to watch

975
00:51:41.760 --> 00:51:45.119
<v Speaker 2>your show and go to sleep. Stoned you are? You

976
00:51:45.159 --> 00:51:54.519
<v Speaker 2>are Dome's mattress who's seen a lot better daily springs. Whatever?

977
00:51:54.559 --> 00:52:10.639
<v Speaker 2>You're ready? Okay? Oh god damn? All right? Every ready? Yeah, alright,

978
00:52:10.760 --> 00:52:14.920
<v Speaker 2>click Netflix. Let's do what are we gonna do?

979
00:52:15.000 --> 00:52:15.360
<v Speaker 5>Netflix?

980
00:52:15.400 --> 00:52:17.559
<v Speaker 2>No, You're I'm gonna go Disney Plus. Yeah, let's go

981
00:52:17.639 --> 00:52:25.960
<v Speaker 2>Disney plus. Uh Lizzy maguay mm hmmm.

982
00:52:27.320 --> 00:52:29.800
<v Speaker 4>That might keep me up a little bit.

983
00:52:29.039 --> 00:52:30.679
<v Speaker 2>Uh oh.

984
00:52:30.800 --> 00:52:44.519
<v Speaker 9>Adam's family Adam's family. Fucking fucking back out, fucking log in.

985
00:52:44.719 --> 00:52:46.599
<v Speaker 9>It's stupid fucking ship.

986
00:52:47.559 --> 00:52:52.239
<v Speaker 5>Oh my god, what the password again, Jesus fucking Christ,

987
00:52:52.239 --> 00:52:53.719
<v Speaker 5>hold on a second word with my phone?

988
00:52:55.840 --> 00:52:57.559
<v Speaker 2>You know what? Fuck it sang?

989
00:52:57.800 --> 00:52:59.639
<v Speaker 8>Your fucking bed is dying.

990
00:53:00.119 --> 00:53:04.519
<v Speaker 2>Booms just gets off.

991
00:53:06.880 --> 00:53:07.159
<v Speaker 3>Click.

992
00:53:08.679 --> 00:53:10.559
<v Speaker 2>I swear to God if you don't play some mattress

993
00:53:10.559 --> 00:53:18.280
<v Speaker 2>someone bit. All right, Oh my god, this is good stuff.

994
00:53:19.079 --> 00:53:20.960
<v Speaker 2>I think we got time for one more. So do

995
00:53:21.000 --> 00:53:26.840
<v Speaker 2>we want to do one more? One more topic? Oh boy,

996
00:53:27.360 --> 00:53:28.039
<v Speaker 2>just one more thing?

997
00:53:28.199 --> 00:53:29.039
<v Speaker 5>O god?

998
00:53:29.440 --> 00:53:34.559
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, alright, So Dome and I are in a bar

999
00:53:36.000 --> 00:53:40.239
<v Speaker 2>and Dome it's it's obviously noisy, but Dome, you are

1000
00:53:40.239 --> 00:53:42.119
<v Speaker 2>gonna try and convince me why the Jets are the

1001
00:53:42.159 --> 00:53:45.679
<v Speaker 2>best team to ever be in the NFL. And Stone

1002
00:53:45.760 --> 00:53:48.440
<v Speaker 2>you are the jukebox that can't quite get its volume control.

1003
00:53:50.679 --> 00:53:52.760
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, look at it.

1004
00:53:52.880 --> 00:53:56.320
<v Speaker 2>All right, let's go. Hey, there's a shot at tequila.

1005
00:53:56.760 --> 00:53:58.039
<v Speaker 2>Take this. Cool.

1006
00:53:59.000 --> 00:54:01.480
<v Speaker 3>Never gonna give you up. They're never gonna let you

1007
00:54:01.599 --> 00:54:03.119
<v Speaker 3>shout down.

1008
00:54:06.159 --> 00:54:11.320
<v Speaker 2>Here's another shot at tequila. Take this. Good bye? Uh

1009
00:54:12.559 --> 00:54:14.519
<v Speaker 2>we were talking about the Jets. Yeah no, here's another

1010
00:54:14.519 --> 00:54:16.679
<v Speaker 2>shot in Hey, here's a shot of quila. Take this.

1011
00:54:20.480 --> 00:54:23.599
<v Speaker 2>Here's another shot at tequila. Take this? How many?

1012
00:54:24.360 --> 00:54:24.559
<v Speaker 3>God?

1013
00:54:25.039 --> 00:54:29.039
<v Speaker 5>He takes about thirteen after we cut to about thirteen. Hey, dude,

1014
00:54:29.039 --> 00:54:31.800
<v Speaker 5>did you know that the Jets are gonna win the

1015
00:54:31.840 --> 00:54:32.280
<v Speaker 5>Super Bowl?

1016
00:54:32.320 --> 00:54:34.440
<v Speaker 3>Get this wet ass pussy.

1017
00:54:35.800 --> 00:54:38.320
<v Speaker 5>No, seriously, the Jets are gonna win the Super Bowl

1018
00:54:38.400 --> 00:54:44.400
<v Speaker 5>this year. There's no way the Jets another here's another shot,

1019
00:54:45.480 --> 00:54:47.119
<v Speaker 5>say taking another shot at tequila.

1020
00:54:47.519 --> 00:54:50.599
<v Speaker 2>We're gonna keep going. Mark Sanchez is the greatest quarterback

1021
00:54:50.639 --> 00:54:52.639
<v Speaker 2>it's ever graced this fucking earth.

1022
00:54:55.000 --> 00:54:57.360
<v Speaker 5>That is the only fucking way I would ever get

1023
00:54:57.400 --> 00:55:01.639
<v Speaker 5>anyone to believe that the Jets are anything but trash.

1024
00:55:01.639 --> 00:55:02.159
<v Speaker 2>That's fair.

1025
00:55:02.880 --> 00:55:06.239
<v Speaker 8>That's a fair point, ladies and gentlemen. We're expancing issues

1026
00:55:06.239 --> 00:55:09.280
<v Speaker 8>with her jukebox. I do apologize. I swear this is

1027
00:55:09.320 --> 00:55:12.119
<v Speaker 8>not how I vision running my Applebee's, but I will

1028
00:55:12.119 --> 00:55:14.960
<v Speaker 8>make sure things are better. Drinks are half off for

1029
00:55:15.000 --> 00:55:15.719
<v Speaker 8>the next half hour.

1030
00:55:17.800 --> 00:55:23.360
<v Speaker 2>Apple apple Bee's coming in with a fucking stripper microphone.

1031
00:55:23.639 --> 00:55:27.440
<v Speaker 4>Fucking Alvin and the Chipmunks back there, Jesus.

1032
00:55:28.360 --> 00:55:30.880
<v Speaker 2>Welcome back to the stage. Destiny.

1033
00:55:32.000 --> 00:55:36.079
<v Speaker 5>Oh shit, not again, it ain't mine, Destiny, Get the

1034
00:55:36.119 --> 00:55:37.000
<v Speaker 5>fuck out of here.

1035
00:55:45.239 --> 00:55:46.519
<v Speaker 2>I was just gonna hit the button. Then I forgot

1036
00:55:46.559 --> 00:55:49.000
<v Speaker 2>how to turn it off.

1037
00:55:49.480 --> 00:55:51.320
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, your laugh was pretty great.

1038
00:55:51.400 --> 00:56:00.400
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it sounded like fucking ezma. Jesus, that was good, Abysma,

1039
00:56:00.480 --> 00:56:03.480
<v Speaker 2>because she sounds like she has asthma when she laughs.

1040
00:56:04.519 --> 00:56:10.079
<v Speaker 3>No, she like she looks like lady in her life,

1041
00:56:10.079 --> 00:56:13.000
<v Speaker 3>looks exactly how you think she would look after like

1042
00:56:13.119 --> 00:56:15.159
<v Speaker 3>just watching the movie and listening to her and like

1043
00:56:15.199 --> 00:56:17.679
<v Speaker 3>seeing her cartoon image. Have you guys ever seen her

1044
00:56:17.679 --> 00:56:19.159
<v Speaker 3>in the booth doing it for the movie back in

1045
00:56:19.159 --> 00:56:22.480
<v Speaker 3>the day. She looks exactly how you think she would

1046
00:56:22.480 --> 00:56:24.440
<v Speaker 3>from her character, Like, it's pretty close.

1047
00:56:25.119 --> 00:56:27.400
<v Speaker 2>And do you think I think she would look.

1048
00:56:28.719 --> 00:56:30.360
<v Speaker 3>Well, it might be different. You know, you might think

1049
00:56:30.400 --> 00:56:33.199
<v Speaker 3>she's like an Amazonian, you know where she's like death

1050
00:56:33.239 --> 00:56:33.920
<v Speaker 3>by snooze nap.

1051
00:56:33.960 --> 00:56:37.800
<v Speaker 2>I thought it was a guy too.

1052
00:56:38.360 --> 00:56:41.719
<v Speaker 5>Wow, I knew it was nice.

1053
00:56:43.440 --> 00:56:45.440
<v Speaker 4>No, I don't think that it's because of asthma.

1054
00:56:46.599 --> 00:56:51.920
<v Speaker 2>Okay, okay, last last question I have for you, Fuck Mary,

1055
00:56:52.000 --> 00:56:57.320
<v Speaker 2>kill real fast. You have Isma. You have a fucking

1056
00:56:57.880 --> 00:57:03.960
<v Speaker 2>octopus lady from Ursula, Ursula and a boiler and canto.

1057
00:57:04.159 --> 00:57:10.760
<v Speaker 5>I'm killing Ala, I'm killing I'm killing Isma, I'm fucking Ursula,

1058
00:57:11.239 --> 00:57:15.679
<v Speaker 5>and I'm marrying a boiler. Okay, because a boiler. Boiler

1059
00:57:15.719 --> 00:57:17.760
<v Speaker 5>is gonna take care of you. She's gonna take care

1060
00:57:17.760 --> 00:57:19.639
<v Speaker 5>of you, dude, like like none of the other two.

1061
00:57:20.119 --> 00:57:23.639
<v Speaker 5>She's gonna treat you like a fucking king Yeah, I'm

1062
00:57:23.679 --> 00:57:29.119
<v Speaker 5>pounding the ever loving ship out of octopus pussy all

1063
00:57:30.639 --> 00:57:35.480
<v Speaker 5>on all eight hundred of them suctions, dude, getting.

1064
00:57:35.840 --> 00:57:39.400
<v Speaker 3>Literally teeth like that. That like horrible movie back in

1065
00:57:39.480 --> 00:57:41.280
<v Speaker 3>the day, she's teeth, legit.

1066
00:57:42.440 --> 00:57:46.559
<v Speaker 2>Oh what about you, Stone can't do I.

1067
00:57:46.559 --> 00:57:51.519
<v Speaker 3>Would one hundred percent Mary Abuela. I think I just

1068
00:57:51.559 --> 00:57:53.800
<v Speaker 3>got a fuck isma and then just kill Ursula.

1069
00:57:56.760 --> 00:57:59.360
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, would you get crabs Fromla.

1070
00:58:00.440 --> 00:58:05.280
<v Speaker 3>I think you might get a lot, to be honest,

1071
00:58:05.320 --> 00:58:08.159
<v Speaker 3>from fucking nasty ship.

1072
00:58:09.320 --> 00:58:11.760
<v Speaker 5>That's kind of rude, man. There's no proof that she

1073
00:58:11.920 --> 00:58:16.840
<v Speaker 5>was a nasty horror. She didn't even have kids, did she.

1074
00:58:16.840 --> 00:58:17.960
<v Speaker 2>She had vibrators.

1075
00:58:18.000 --> 00:58:21.199
<v Speaker 3>It smells like the ocean. It's a no.

1076
00:58:21.639 --> 00:58:23.119
<v Speaker 2>Well, she lives in the ocean.

1077
00:58:23.920 --> 00:58:25.679
<v Speaker 4>Of course she's gonna smell like the ocean.

1078
00:58:25.760 --> 00:58:26.880
<v Speaker 2>She lives in the ocean.

1079
00:58:27.239 --> 00:58:28.079
<v Speaker 3>It applies too.

1080
00:58:28.639 --> 00:58:30.559
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, but what if you're underwater you can't smell.

1081
00:58:30.840 --> 00:58:39.199
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, she would turn you into a fish, and that

1082
00:58:39.280 --> 00:58:40.199
<v Speaker 3>would be a bad thing.

1083
00:58:41.119 --> 00:58:42.280
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it'd be horror.

1084
00:58:42.920 --> 00:58:46.199
<v Speaker 5>Swim my fish ass up into that fish assus kind

1085
00:58:46.239 --> 00:58:46.559
<v Speaker 5>of fish.

1086
00:58:46.639 --> 00:58:48.440
<v Speaker 2>He gets turned would you be?

1087
00:58:49.119 --> 00:58:51.320
<v Speaker 3>He gets turned into like a fucking.

1088
00:58:51.360 --> 00:58:53.840
<v Speaker 5>One of those retarded ones with the eyes in different

1089
00:58:53.880 --> 00:58:54.800
<v Speaker 5>fucking directions.

1090
00:58:57.480 --> 00:58:58.960
<v Speaker 2>He turns into a sea horse.

1091
00:58:59.719 --> 00:59:03.039
<v Speaker 3>Oh my god? Why am I like so gay? Did

1092
00:59:03.079 --> 00:59:07.320
<v Speaker 3>you know the men seahorses have the baby sea horses

1093
00:59:07.320 --> 00:59:10.599
<v Speaker 3>aren't gay? Domes like, Oh my god, I made myself gay.

1094
00:59:10.880 --> 00:59:16.920
<v Speaker 3>Fuck But you're like, dude, you're one to his new group. Lady,

1095
00:59:17.119 --> 00:59:18.159
<v Speaker 3>I'm gonna tell you.

1096
00:59:27.280 --> 00:59:29.199
<v Speaker 2>I got nothing left for that, all right?

1097
00:59:30.199 --> 00:59:35.920
<v Speaker 5>I think Sandy sand dollars bro Oh, I mean.

1098
00:59:36.119 --> 00:59:38.480
<v Speaker 2>Who lives in upside down pineapple under the sea?

1099
00:59:41.320 --> 00:59:43.840
<v Speaker 5>All right, here you go, fuck Mary, kill SpongeBob, squid

1100
00:59:43.880 --> 00:59:44.639
<v Speaker 5>Word and Patrick.

1101
00:59:45.760 --> 00:59:55.360
<v Speaker 3>Oh uh, I'm gonna marry Squidward. I'm gonna kill SpongeBob.

1102
00:59:56.079 --> 00:59:57.360
<v Speaker 3>I'm gonna fuck the starfish.

1103
00:59:58.840 --> 01:00:02.599
<v Speaker 2>I like that. I'm to switch around Starfish and squid

1104
01:00:02.599 --> 01:00:06.199
<v Speaker 2>Word though their roles. Yeah, but I'm definitely killing SpongeBob

1105
01:00:06.280 --> 01:00:09.079
<v Speaker 2>because you can't live with that, and you can't fuck

1106
01:00:09.079 --> 01:00:10.679
<v Speaker 2>it because then it's just going to continue to talk

1107
01:00:10.719 --> 01:00:13.440
<v Speaker 2>to you and bother you. So you just got to

1108
01:00:13.519 --> 01:00:13.840
<v Speaker 2>kill it.

1109
01:00:13.880 --> 01:00:16.159
<v Speaker 4>I would marry Patrick because Patrick would be more fun.

1110
01:00:18.079 --> 01:00:21.159
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, but squid words more representation of real married life.

1111
01:00:22.079 --> 01:00:28.599
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, yeah, true, right, yeah, you're not wrong.

1112
01:00:29.159 --> 01:00:32.280
<v Speaker 2>Oh that was the other thing. Our producer caught the boquet.

1113
01:00:32.760 --> 01:00:37.119
<v Speaker 2>Oh sweet, when he when's the not? When's the big day?

1114
01:00:37.199 --> 01:00:39.880
<v Speaker 2>It's not happening. Let's go. Let's go to Vegas. Make

1115
01:00:39.920 --> 01:00:40.320
<v Speaker 2>it happen.

1116
01:00:40.559 --> 01:00:44.559
<v Speaker 3>No shotgun wedding. Baby can do it in the drive through.

1117
01:00:45.400 --> 01:00:53.599
<v Speaker 2>Who's holding the shotgun? Anybody? Oh? No, should make it happen.

1118
01:00:54.480 --> 01:00:58.840
<v Speaker 2>Let's go ring shopping. No, come on, let's do it.

1119
01:00:59.400 --> 01:01:01.559
<v Speaker 2>No we get say we're going ring shopping and we're

1120
01:01:01.599 --> 01:01:02.440
<v Speaker 2>really going golfing.

1121
01:01:02.599 --> 01:01:03.360
<v Speaker 4>Okay, I'll do that.

1122
01:01:04.199 --> 01:01:10.000
<v Speaker 3>Okay, I will do that. You guys went to look

1123
01:01:10.000 --> 01:01:12.119
<v Speaker 3>for rings. Just happens to be the amount of time

1124
01:01:12.159 --> 01:01:15.119
<v Speaker 3>you guys get done golfing. Yeah, it's busy.

1125
01:01:15.760 --> 01:01:21.719
<v Speaker 2>Jared was slammed that day. Every kiss begins with k.

1126
01:01:21.960 --> 01:01:25.480
<v Speaker 3>Okay, okay, how long is this lying? You know what

1127
01:01:25.519 --> 01:01:25.880
<v Speaker 3>I'm saying?

1128
01:01:26.639 --> 01:01:31.599
<v Speaker 2>Prenup? All right? Well whatever does on dake website of

1129
01:01:31.719 --> 01:01:34.639
<v Speaker 2>one seven zero catch next week?

1130
01:01:34.679 --> 01:01:45.920
<v Speaker 3>Peace out later? Oh hey, guys, oh what this.

1131
01:01:45.960 --> 01:01:49.480
<v Speaker 5>Priest asked the convicted murder in the electric chair do

1132
01:01:49.519 --> 01:01:53.159
<v Speaker 5>you have any last requests yes, replies to murderer Can

1133
01:01:53.199 --> 01:01:57.880
<v Speaker 5>you please hold my hand?

1134
01:01:58.800 --> 01:01:59.199
<v Speaker 2>Wow?

1135
01:02:04.360 --> 01:02:09.679
<v Speaker 3>Shocking yees