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<v Speaker 1>Seven.

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<v Speaker 2>Lamb Productions Presents Cop Doctor episode thirty seven, Not PC enough.

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<v Speaker 1>Time. You left the towel on the bathroom floor again

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<v Speaker 1>and I almost trip?

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<v Speaker 2>Then move it.

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<v Speaker 1>It's your towel.

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<v Speaker 3>So you leave things around the house all the time too,

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<v Speaker 3>and I don't trip over everything.

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<v Speaker 1>That's because everything I leave around the house is untrippable.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh isn't that convenient?

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<v Speaker 1>Have you tripped?

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<v Speaker 2>No?

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<v Speaker 3>But that's because I'm very feet and stepping conscious and

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<v Speaker 3>I'm not apparently not.

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<v Speaker 4>Wow, it was twelve thirty on a Saturday and the Doctor.

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<v Speaker 4>We're enjoying another day off. And by enjoying, I mean

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<v Speaker 4>that they were arguing because of the messy place.

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<v Speaker 3>Just hang your towels from now, Fine, don't be such

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<v Speaker 3>a spass.

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<v Speaker 2>I wonder who that is.

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<v Speaker 1>Maybe it's an Amazon delivery. I ordered a box.

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<v Speaker 2>You ordered a box from Amazon? Why?

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<v Speaker 1>I needed a box to store my old winter cloth, So.

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<v Speaker 2>You ordered one box?

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<v Speaker 1>No, I ordered a nifty cooler and I'm helping. They

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<v Speaker 1>mailed it in a super durable box.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, if they didn't, you can always store your winter

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<v Speaker 2>clothes and the nifty cooler.

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't even think of that.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm coming, I'm coming Hello, How can I help you?

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<v Speaker 1>Hello?

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<v Speaker 5>I'm Samantha Cy. I'm with the BOPC.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh pick, isn't it BIPOCK?

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<v Speaker 5>No, it's BOPC. But don't worry. We may be talking

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<v Speaker 5>about BIPOC later. Oh goodie, was that sarcasm? It better

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<v Speaker 5>not have been sarcasm.

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<v Speaker 4>Samantha's She walked in with her clipboard at hey, what

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<v Speaker 4>are you doing?

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<v Speaker 1>We didn't invite you in.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, I guess we know she's not a vampire.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah that's good.

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<v Speaker 5>I guess we need to talk.

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<v Speaker 2>Who are you again?

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<v Speaker 5>I'm Samantha See with the bo PC, Samantha C like

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<v Speaker 5>Samantha Bee, but more average.

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<v Speaker 2>BOPC.

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<v Speaker 5>That's the Board of Political Correctness.

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<v Speaker 1>The Board of Political Correctness.

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<v Speaker 5>That's right.

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<v Speaker 3>Why is it BOPC. Shouldn't it just be BPC? You

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<v Speaker 3>don't capitalize of we do?

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<v Speaker 5>Now want to know why? Sure, because you don't exclude

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<v Speaker 5>anyone or anything, even.

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<v Speaker 2>The word of your darn titton.

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<v Speaker 1>Why are you here?

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<v Speaker 5>You want to know why?

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<v Speaker 1>I mean, I did just ask, but now that I

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<v Speaker 1>think about it, I really don't care.

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<v Speaker 5>Well I'll tell you anyways. I'm here because someone said spaz.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah I did. That was me I said it.

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<v Speaker 5>Well, congratulations, thank you, You sir are a bigot. I

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<v Speaker 5>am your darn tutin.

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<v Speaker 2>If that's your catchphrase, it's dumb.

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<v Speaker 5>Did you just call me a woman? Dumb?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, but not because you're a woman. I said it

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<v Speaker 2>because what you said is dumb.

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<v Speaker 5>Doesn't matter. It should, but it doesn't. That means that's

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<v Speaker 5>another strike for.

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<v Speaker 1>You, Samantha Si made a mock in halfaias.

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<v Speaker 5>Do you know how many strikes until you're in super trouble?

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<v Speaker 2>Three?

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<v Speaker 5>This isn't baseball.

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<v Speaker 1>What's super trouble?

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<v Speaker 5>Don't worry. You'll find out soon enough, especially you, mister time.

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<v Speaker 5>You have six strikes already.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, how many do I have?

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<v Speaker 2>Five?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah?

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<v Speaker 2>I'm winning.

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<v Speaker 1>Wait what are these strikes mean?

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<v Speaker 2>And where are they coming from?

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<v Speaker 5>They come from you and your insensitivity.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm insensitive and a bigot.

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<v Speaker 5>Not only are you insensitive and a bigot, but you

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<v Speaker 5>aren't very woke.

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<v Speaker 2>But I'm not asleep.

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<v Speaker 5>You too, don't seem to understand. I've been monitoring your

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<v Speaker 5>activities and your conversations for years now, and you two

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<v Speaker 5>are very and I mean very insensitive.

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<v Speaker 1>Me too, yep, I'll suh.

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<v Speaker 5>Well, you've made tons of jokes at the expense of

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<v Speaker 5>many other groups. You're offending too many people like who

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<v Speaker 5>It'll take too long to go through them all.

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<v Speaker 1>Why are you here now? How do we offend this time?

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<v Speaker 5>Time here? Said spaz? So well, you can't say that?

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<v Speaker 5>Why because it's insensitive and targets a marginalized group.

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<v Speaker 2>It does, that's right.

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<v Speaker 5>Why do you think Liza was once put in time out.

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<v Speaker 2>Because she misspelled girls?

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<v Speaker 5>No, it's because she said the S word shit spaz.

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<v Speaker 5>Oh my, I shouldn't have done that. That's a strike

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<v Speaker 5>for me.

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<v Speaker 2>Tists, samanthasy, I do apologize. I'm just kidding. I don't care.

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<v Speaker 1>We can't say spaz Nope, because it's offensive, that's right,

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<v Speaker 1>that's duh.

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<v Speaker 5>Hey, truth thurds?

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<v Speaker 2>What truth? Or are you just naming a Lizzo song?

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<v Speaker 5>The point is no more offensive humor, that's the point.

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<v Speaker 5>Nothing about race or gender, No ableism, agism or fat shaming,

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<v Speaker 5>No mocking of religions or use of outdated terms.

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<v Speaker 1>Jesus Christ, Hey.

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<v Speaker 5>What did I say? We can't say that, not in

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<v Speaker 5>a derogatory way. In fact, no more cursing either. That

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<v Speaker 5>offends people.

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<v Speaker 2>What about if we say cunt?

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<v Speaker 5>No that's the worst one.

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<v Speaker 2>No, I mean using it in a productive, normal way.

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<v Speaker 5>Give me an example.

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<v Speaker 2>You are being a cunt.

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<v Speaker 5>That is another strike.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm still winning.

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<v Speaker 5>It's not a contest.

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<v Speaker 1>So we can't make nah jokes.

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<v Speaker 5>Not only can you not make jokes, but you need

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<v Speaker 5>to refrain from using terms such as little person, man up, yolo,

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<v Speaker 5>coming out, happy holidays, and so on.

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<v Speaker 2>Even happy holidays.

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<v Speaker 5>We're trying to appease the groups on both sides of

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<v Speaker 5>the political aisle.

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<v Speaker 3>But if we say Merry Christmas, isn't that alienating people

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<v Speaker 3>who don't celebrate Christmas?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah? What should we say? Instead?

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<v Speaker 5>You should say happy every day?

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<v Speaker 1>Happy every day?

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<v Speaker 5>That's right, because holidays are no more special than any

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<v Speaker 5>other day. Think about it this way. You say something

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<v Speaker 5>like happy Thanksgiving. Yeah, but I don't celebrate Thanksgiving. Not

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<v Speaker 5>only that, my birthday is on a different day, It's

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<v Speaker 5>on November two. Are you saying that Thanksgiving is better

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<v Speaker 5>than my birthday? No, but that's what it sounds like

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<v Speaker 5>to me.

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<v Speaker 1>That's not what I said, right, But it's.

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<v Speaker 5>My interpretation of what you said. See, I hear what

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<v Speaker 5>you say and then I put my own spin on

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<v Speaker 5>it to make it about me.

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<v Speaker 1>And isn't that your fault. No, it's yours, but it's

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<v Speaker 1>really not.

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<v Speaker 5>Everything that out of your mouth should be filtered at

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<v Speaker 5>all times, and you should never speak your mind until

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<v Speaker 5>you take at least three days to ponder the effects

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<v Speaker 5>it'll have on every single person in the world around you.

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<v Speaker 2>Aren't there like eight billion people on the planet.

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<v Speaker 5>Yes?

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<v Speaker 2>And isn't everyone different and unique in their own way,

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<v Speaker 2>with different ideologies, thoughts, manners, perspectives, views, and abilities. Yes,

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<v Speaker 2>then I don't want to do that ever.

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<v Speaker 5>Okay, you're saying you want to be Roseanne. It seems

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<v Speaker 5>like you want to be Roseanne?

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<v Speaker 2>Who said I want to be Roseanne?

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<v Speaker 5>You're acting like Roseanne?

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<v Speaker 2>Am I?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah? Is he?

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<v Speaker 5>That's how I'm interpreting everything you said.

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<v Speaker 1>Again, isn't that on you?

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<v Speaker 5>Nope? Not in today's world, which brings me to some

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<v Speaker 5>other issues on the show. The narrators are narrators, your

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<v Speaker 5>darn tutin.

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<v Speaker 2>Seriously, that is like nails on a chalkboard.

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<v Speaker 5>Are you saying that because I'm a woman and I'm

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<v Speaker 5>irritating and have nails?

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<v Speaker 2>Does it matter what I say right now?

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<v Speaker 1>Not?

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<v Speaker 5>Really?

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<v Speaker 1>Then?

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, I'm saying that because you're a woman and have nails.

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<v Speaker 2>I knew it.

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<v Speaker 1>What about our nails?

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<v Speaker 5>You have to get rid of them, especially the current one.

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<v Speaker 5>Since he's still working it's offensive.

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<v Speaker 1>You have to fire him.

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<v Speaker 5>Yep. Otherwise me and people like me are going to

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<v Speaker 5>cancel you.

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<v Speaker 2>What does that mean.

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<v Speaker 5>It means we're all going to go on social media

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<v Speaker 5>and demand an apology for a few weeks. Then after

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<v Speaker 5>you apologize, we aren't going to accept it and instead

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<v Speaker 5>going to try to get you fired. Then two weeks

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<v Speaker 5>after that, we're going to forget any of this ever

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<v Speaker 5>happened and move on to the next thing that we

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<v Speaker 5>find offensive.

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<v Speaker 1>But why would you do that?

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<v Speaker 5>Well, it's either we do that or we just don't

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<v Speaker 5>listen to your content anymore.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, why don't you do that? Don't listen?

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<v Speaker 5>Explain?

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<v Speaker 1>If you don't like what we're saying and don't find

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<v Speaker 1>what we say funny, why don't you listen to something else,

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<v Speaker 1>something that maybe you will like.

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<v Speaker 5>I can't do that, neither can the other members of

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<v Speaker 5>the BOPC, and neither can the fine over sensitive tweens

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<v Speaker 5>of social media landscape who know nothing about history or

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<v Speaker 5>the foundations of comedy.

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<v Speaker 1>Again, may I ask why you may.

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<v Speaker 5>Ask, but I may not get an answer.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, okay, so what does this all mean?

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<v Speaker 5>It means that from now on I will be monitoring

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<v Speaker 5>everything you do, insaye, and I will censor accordingly.

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<v Speaker 2>You've got to be not at all.

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<v Speaker 4>The cop doctors, we're furious, But what could they do?

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<v Speaker 4>Samantha sy refused to leave, and if they forced herd

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<v Speaker 4>to do anything, even get out of their house, they

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<v Speaker 4>would be labeled sexist or some shit.

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<v Speaker 5>Whoa, woa, whoa. Now this narrator has got to go.

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<v Speaker 1>What is this?

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<v Speaker 5>This is offensive out, Let's move it. I'll wrap up here.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, goodbye, Cop Doctors.

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<v Speaker 5>Wait there we go this bors, Hey, watch the language

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<v Speaker 5>and be quiet. I'm narrating to delue everyone. Cop Doctors,

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<v Speaker 5>Cop Doctors.

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<v Speaker 2>Written by Robert m Lamb, edited by Claude c Revisions

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<v Speaker 2>by Mia Supful, starring Robert M Lamb as time and

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<v Speaker 2>Jack Austen as case narrator and Captain co starring Jabrina Cooper.

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<v Speaker 6>Music provided by Kevin McLoud of incompetec dot com. Additional

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<v Speaker 6>tracks from various artists on pondfive dot com and artlist

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<v Speaker 6>dot io. If you enjoy this podcast, don't forget to

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<v Speaker 6>rate and review and visit www dot seven lamb dot

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<v Speaker 6>com for more podcasts such as this one. And we

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<v Speaker 6>want to thank everyone who has donated on our PayPal

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<v Speaker 6>and our Patreon page.

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<v Speaker 7>We appreciate the support and we want to give us

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<v Speaker 7>special shout out to our seven Lamp patrons Brad McQuaid,

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<v Speaker 7>Kelly Fowles, Chris Williamson, Carter Jewel and Daniel Wolfman.

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<v Speaker 2>From everyone here at seven Lamb, thank you. This has

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<v Speaker 2>been a seven lam production