Speaker 1: Christy Love my guest for the evening. You know exactly
where you can find her at CLCA sixty nine. Her
new podcast, in Bed with Christy Love is available now
on YouTube and anywhere you get podcasts. Links to all
of our social media in the episode description below. At
the bare minimum, folks follow these performers. It really helps
them out. And then when payday rolls around, boom, you
sign up for the good stuff. Also make sure you
like subscribe this and that. Christy. After a quick misstep
on my part, I want to apologize for that. Thank
you so much for coming on with me tonight.
Speaker 2: Yes, thank you. It's such a pleasure.
Speaker 1: So first question, with all that you do, if you
had to sum it up, what do you consider your
job title to be, Because it's a lot yes.
Speaker 2: Pastor, porn star and stand up comedian.
Speaker 1: That is quite an eclectic mix, I believe.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, it's crazy.
Speaker 1: Well, talk me through then maybe let me try and
organize this in my mind. Talk me through how you
got the title comedian first, and then I'd like to
talk about how you got the title porn star first,
and then later on in the episode we'll get to
how you got the title pastor. So, how do you
consider yourself a comedian? Why do you consider yourself a comedian?
What kind of comedian?
Speaker 2: M hmm, that's a great question. Well, I have gone
through so much pain and agony and trauma, so I
figure it's cheaper to go do comedy then spend money
on therapy. So with all the trials and trivilations that
have gone through, I guess in the last do you
have just pursued full I'm not full time, but just
pursued it. And I tried to do comedy a couple
times a week, whether it's performing or open mic.
Speaker 1: Now, okay, that's fascinating because I read comedian there and
I was like, okay, to what extent? So you're actually
going on stage in terms of this, You're not just
like a girl who's funny with your other girlfriends. You're like,
I'm a comedian. No, you are really doing comedy.
Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, yeah, I have done some really cool stuff.
I at least perform or get booked a few times
a month, and I'm still brand news, so it's not
as much as I would like. But I have a
comedy coach that I do coaching like once a week
and it's just so much fun. I in general, I
love to perform, So being a pastor, a porn star,
and standup comedian, we're all performing on stage all the time.
Speaker 1: You know, if we had to sum it up into
one word, maybe that's what you or you are just
a performer like Y give you, give you a medium
or something to tackle. And it sounds like Christy's gonna
jump into that and learn it and if you show
interest in it, right.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, absolutely, Okay, all.
Speaker 1: Right, So then the big question is how did you
initially get into the adult entertainment industry. What was your
crossover from vanilla life into this world and was it positive?
Speaker 2: Was it?
Speaker 1: And I don't want you to harp on it if
it's negative, like I don't want to come at you
about it, But what was your trip into this?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Actually it's so hard to say without talking about
my faith because the order is pastor, born star and comedian.
But just to the honest truth, I was planning, church
planning and church Flanny wasn't making money. So I went
on Crank's list and I was scrolling through when I
found an ad that's it, hey work at home and
make some good money. I was like click what is
this about? And I was like, what is this? And
I remember just looking around this website and I was like, what,
There's all these women that are in lingerie or they're naked,
and I'm like, I don't know if I want to
do this. But at the time, it was so desperate,
and you know, financially, when you're in a position of desperation,
you know what you got to do. And so I
that was, I would say, my gateway to the adult industry.
And then eventually it's so hard to talk about it
without the faith, but I got caught trying to you know,
church plant at the same time and also webcamming. So
I shut down the church and then continued to get
into webcamming because hey, I still had to pay for
the room for a head, you know. And then from
there I just told my husband. I was like, hey, babe,
what do you think I want to get into full
time porn. We're not We're not in ministry anymore. And
at the time, you know, we had it pretty we
had a kinky relationship, and so I was like, what
do you think about being getting to full time porn
actually going into it, not just webcamming and that's kind
of the gateway, you know, of me. Like he was like,
whatever you want to do, I support you. So I
was folding my d and I was like, yeah, I
do want to do this.
Speaker 1: This looks fun, this is this is again, this is
a completely judgment free zone. My my rule is my
rule is just don't be in a room with a
dog and you're good, okay. But but I have to
say this, doesn't it seem a bit drastic or a
bit real bot not like like polar shifting, Like wasn't
dairy queen hiring for managers maybe? Or like hot I
guess hot topic would probably put you in the same
kind of trouble. But it seems so drastic to go
church to I'm gonna do some kind of porn.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I know, that's a great question. So the reason
why I didn't go through that route, even though my
husband did, is because, I mean, we were so broke
at the time that our parents were paying. Let me
just explain how broke we were. His parents are paying
for a rent one one month, mine was another month,
and we're still trying to run this church. We could
not afford anything. They would even help out with groceries.
And so I could go through the process of trying
to be you know, we're at a grocery store or
you know, whatever other jobs are there. But the process
to go through that is you have to apply, you
wait until they call you. You then have to do
an interview, and when you do, you're competing against all
these people. Then you wait until they call you back
to see if you made it in the finals, and
then you just hope and pray that you just get booked.
You usually don't go through the process of hey, I
need a job, like right now, because if I don't
get a job right now, then my parents are gonna
have to pay for another month. So I need something now.
So well, Kim, provided I need a job right now, Okay,
just fill out this form, give me a couple hours
to verify you're eighteen and over, and boom you can
start working. Yes, great deal, all right.
Speaker 1: So it was it was immediate then, But let me ask,
Let me ask this was there. Maybe you said your
relationship you had, you know, you had been a little
you know, I don't know what term you used. I
don't want to say freaky if that's not what you said.
Speaker 2: But.
Speaker 1: Non conventional. Let's say, let's put it that way. Did that?
And I know there's so many different branches and everything else,
But was this always a little bit in you, like
maybe like, yes, you have your religious side and you
believe in that and it's strong with you, but maybe
there's a little part where you're like, I am a
little hyper sexual and when this comes along, yes, I
can wait for the process over here and this and that,
this is pretty immediate. I can do this right now,
and I really don't mind doing it. Was that ever
a consideration for you that.
Speaker 2: To be honestly truthful, No, I was not even a
kinky kind of person at all.
Speaker 1: Wow.
Speaker 2: What opened that side of me was actually webcamming and
the possibilities and all that stuff. So backtrack, I was,
you know, I was molested and raped, you know, as
in my child and adolescents, and so every time I
had any type of sexual interaction in my mind, I
correlated that with pain, and so I wish I could say,
oh my god, I was just like this franky person.
But the truth is, my story is completely different. I
started webcamming, and you know, I did so well because
people saw how innocent I was. They were like, oh
my god, this girl is like, she doesn't even know
what anything is, and that was so hot for all
these men seeing like this girl next door she doesn't
know what she's doing. So I did really well as
a webcam model, but I started to see a shift
go go plummet down and I ended up having like
a webcam mentor and she's like, you need to learn
to actually be authentically horny, and I was like, I
didn't know how to correlate, how to be that. I
was just acting all the time because I did not
enjoy it at all. I was just doing it for
the money at the time. And when I started discovering like, okay,
I had to learn to enjoy myself and my own body.
And when I started doing that, I started really enjoying
myself and then my husband, and then that open doors
of like kind of being a little bit more explorative,
you know, unconventional. So people say, oh, webcamming or you know,
don't work destroys people, and my story is like no,
it actually was so healing and it was very healthy
for me because it liberated all the past traumas that
I went through and shifted my mindsets to from being
this is painful, this is bad, and even religious, and
you know, religion tells you it's so bad, you're sinful,
You're it's like the preach like it's an unforgivable sin.
If you are in this industry, you're lost your salvation.
You know, it's like that's how they preach. And and
I realized, you know what it did the opposite for me.
It healed me. It healed me of my trauma. It
healed my relationship with my husband. So many men are
out there cheating on their wives, and I'm sorry to say,
because their wives are not, you know, being as sexual
as they should be. So of course a human being,
a human man is a horn like born horny. And
so they go out and they they need release some
other way if they're not being taken care of at home.
And I know that's gonna piss off a whole bunch
of women. But I talked to a whole bunch of
cheating men, and a lot of them say, hey, I
love my wives, but you know, after they had a baby,
she just she just stopped and he needed an outlet.
And so for me, I just felt like for my marriage,
it has we have so much trust. We It healed
me you know, we have so much love, our our
intimate life is so freaking amazing, you know, And uh,
I just I feel like for me it was overall
a healing thing. Now, what do I say everyone should
go through the adult industry. It's so healthy. I do
see a damaging part of it, And I believe that's
where people's journey and their own conviction everyone walks through
out how they should live. Right, Like some people they
shouldn't drink alcohol because they're addictive to they have an
addictive personality. There's people out there who can drink a
glass of wine and they're totally fine. So I feel
like everyone has their own convictions and what is healthy
for them and what is not. And I know that
many people might look at me and be like, dude,
I've never heard that adult or could heal someone never
heard that story. But for my reality, that's the honest truth.
Speaker 1: Well, you know who says that is people who've never
done adult work. You know a lot of people tell
you all the shame you should feel, or the anger
you should feel, or this and that, having never walked
in your shoes. So I would say, as long as
it's not destructive to other people, whatever you can do
in life to heal yourself from such trauma you had
at some point? Doesn't that make sense? And why should
not that you do obviously, But why should anybody in
life worry about the judgment of other people who, at
the end of the day, aren't the ones given the
responsibility of make you feel happy, make you feel human again?
Speaker 2: You know?
Speaker 1: But but but I will say this, what piece of
it can you give any piece of advice to any
newer performer? I have a lot of newer performers that
listen to the show and and check it out because
they want to come on eventually, And this and that
is there any advice you can give to any younger
girls getting into it how to know if it is right?
And again that is completely subjective to different people. But
for you, did it click at some point? Like you said,
you went in scared, You went in a little unsure
of what to do, and then eventually it clicked. What
was that? Was it a scene that you did where
you went this just felt right? Was it something you
did while camming where you just went that's it?
Speaker 2: This?
Speaker 1: This is how this is how I feel horny. Now,
this is how I feel aroused.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think that if you treat this as a
business and you don't treat it as this is something
that is here to fulfill me, that's when it becomes
healthy or unhealthy, just like any under entertainment or in
any social media influencer. And what I mean by this
is that I'm going to give an example because I
see this also in a lot of social media influencers.
Like there was this woman who had millions and millions
of followers and she's so famous. She was a big
time TikToker, and everywhere we would go, everyone would stop
and be like, oh my god, I can't believe it's you,
right because she was so big, but she dealt with
a lot of mental issues and she started spiraling, spiraling
down even further because her validation was the praise from people.
That's what made her confident. That's what made her feel
uh whole, Yes, yeah, whole. But see, I will say
that is a very very bad reason to become a
social media influencer. And the reason why is because when
people praise you, you're like, hey, I'm on top of
the roof. But let me tell you, when not everyone's
gonna like you, there's gonna be people out there who
are gonna hate you, that are gonna bash you. They're gonna,
you know, do TikTok videos about you, and you know,
talk crap and make up crap and try to stalk you.
And so it brought down her mentality so low. And
you see a lot of people that they and sometimes
it's so bad they that they even end their life
because they cannot handle the pressure. And so, whether you're
an adults worker, you're a famous uh social media influencer,
if your motive is for let me fulfill myself, let
me fill my whole, then whether your reason is the
affirmation of people, whether it's money, whatever it is, is
going to control you and will be pretty much your god.
But if you look at as this my motive is,
this is my business, You're going to look beyond like
how can I impact other people's lives out whether I'm
gonna My perspective is that if people talk crap about you,
it's not going to affect you. If people praise you,
it's not gonna affect you. If money comes in, it's
not gonna affect you. If money comes is a low season,
it's not gonna affect you. Because your your motive is
not about those things that are kind of controlling your life.
I don't know if I'm making sense.
Speaker 1: That makes total That makes total sense to me. I've
been playing around with this stupid analogy in my head
and I couldn't figure out if it made sense or not.
It's like when you if you drive one hundred miles
an hour, Okay, there's an exhilaration and joy, you know,
but that can't be your only joy and exhilaration in life.
Because you got to turn off the highway at some
point point right, you have to go a residential road.
You're gonna have to drive twenty five. So make it
so you just enjoy the act of driving. If you're
able to make it so, you enjoy it. In this analogy,
enjoy the act of driving, and when it hits one hundred,
you can go, this is very nice. And when you're
doing twenty five, you go, this is nice too. I
enjoy this. That was kind of the analogy I was
putting together. If if you base your life on stats,
or on achievements, or on this and that, rather than
just putting in the work you feel like you are
capable of putting in, it can really only end. Bad
stats stop. At some point people drop off. You are
old not you somebody. You are old news at some point,
so you're gonna have to either reinvent or accept your
new position in this next tier down. I hate to
say that, I don't mean it like that.
Speaker 2: But right it's really yeah, yeah. And so I would
say to any new person, and even every new person
that comes up to me that says should I go
into it or not? I always say, what is your motive?
And make sure your motive is not is beyond yourself.
So when it comes to business, it's like, my motive
in general is like how can I impact at least
one person a day? And so like right now as
an entrepreneur, as a businesswoman, I'm like, I'm trying to
make money, and my goal is I want me hopefully
this year that I want to be able to have
one time, full employee where she you know, I can pay,
I'm able to help her pay for the roof over
her head, live a comfortable life. She's she's spoken to
me that she hopes to one day go back to college,
and I'm like, I got to work my plucking ass
off so that not only for me, but I can
be a blessing to her and her life and her future,
and so in everything we do, if your mindset is
what can I do for others with what I got?
Even in my fame, I'm like, Okay, I want to
today maybe go on live and hopefully speak some word
of encouragement to someone. And it's like, Lord, if you're
gonna elevate me, elevate me so I can impact more
people's lives. And if I have that mindset, it doesn't
matter who hates me, who loves me, how much money
comes in, how much money you know. Obviously, yeah we
do get affected at times, but I make sure that
my motive. If I as long as I focus on
my motive and my reason, I can stay strong. I
could keep persevering and I can keep running after and
I want to feel like giving up or being drained.
Speaker 1: And that's what we have to fight every day, is
by That's what I fight every day, is am I
too drained to do this? And you have to go No,
I'm not physically drained. Mentally, I can push myself into
it and figure out and then you start doing it
and you feel joy. You go, this is what I
want it to do. I'm glad I push myself to
do this. Let's talk about your podcast, in Bed with
Christy Love, available on YouTube and everywhere else. Right, if
you watch this episode, I'll say and leave a comment
everything else, head on over and subscribe. A lot of
people are starting podcasts. I started a podcast late. I
started covid is what we started with this, and I
originally had a co host and I decided to keep going.
But I've wanted to do podcasting since Joe Rogan episode
number thirty eight. He's on episode almost twenty five hundred now,
and back then I went, my friends are funny enough,
I can do this, and we never did. So let
me ask you, with everybody starting podcast now, what is
going to set yours apart? What are you bringing to
You're bringing Christy Love to it, which is a huge
bump right off the bat because you're an amazing person
with amazing stories. But are you doing what is the
mission of this podcast? What is your hope? Is it
kind of what you said there, to spread knowledge? Is
it to express yourself on a daily basis? Are you
tackling like done daily news type topics? What is in
Bed with Christy Love going to be to show.
Speaker 2: People that we're human and I have been judged a lot,
and so I am giving out my story and I
am also interviewing very many people, a lot of people
from adult you know, sex workers to comedians to politicians
to actors, and I want people to see these people
and know that they're human side. It's kind of like
I love this show The Boys like Warfront. It's like,
you see these superheroes, You're like, oh my god, Homelander
is so amazing, but then when you watch this show,
you're like, oh, this man is a wacko. There's something
behind him. But not just saying that, but in the
I love that show because there shows the humanity of
these superheroes. And for me, I'm doing it in the
most you know, obviously uplifting light, not showing the negative
side of people. But I want people to say, hey,
we can look at someone and we can see them
two sides of the story, but let me dig deeper
into the real story of who they are. And so
for example, I remember I was in ABNS and my
makeup artist told me the story that she was doing
this Talents makeup and all of a sudden, she took
off her wig, and my makeup artist was done like whoa,
you're completely bald, Like what the heck? And then she
uh the talent goes up to her and says, yeah,
I do porn to pay off my leukemia treatments. And
so that hit me so hard. And after she told
me that story, I mean it dug deep because I
knew how many people judge people and they only know
one side of the story. But if they heard the humanity,
if they heard the other side of the story, maybe
we could have a little bit more grace on people
instead of instantly judge and hate people. And so pretty
much that's what my podcast is about. You hear my
story and my humanity side and the struggles I've had
to go through. And I am humbled in privileged to
be able to bring out stories of people who are
famous or people who have been judged. And I want
to show you here's another side of this story.
Speaker 1: Dubs and beautiful answer. Can I ask you a question
and you don't have to give any information? Is and
this is was that person an Asian porn star? Yes,
I think I know who you're talking about, because I
think I saw some scenes where the wig came off.
I did not know. Maybe I don't know. I ask
after the show, but I did not know that. But
if so, that makes me have so much even more respect,
Like I respected this person as a performer, and to
hear that that's one that's very strong and powerful. It's
also very sad, you know, in society at least.
Speaker 2: You know, yeah, yeah, you know.
Speaker 1: All right, let's talk real quick about the content. I'm
sorry to go from something so serious into this, but
I do a thing called stat check on here. We
use the Internet Adult Film Database. It is inaccurate, it
doesn't include all of your stuff. It's gonna be wrong,
but it's a nice little benchmark where we can go.
We recorded it on this day, and these were how
many scenes he had done and how many people he
had worked with in this and that at the time.
So for scenes, I have one hundred and ninety. For
male talent, you've worked with eighty seven. For female talent,
you've worked with fifty six. I only look at AVNS
because there's so many different award shows. But I kind
of just like to, you know, narrow it down. Three nominations,
no wins yet, right, correct keyword yet? Okay? I wanted
to go through a few of your scenes. So here's
what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna show the audience as
much as I can, and I'm going to show you
as my background a couple of scenes. So the first
scene I have for you here is from Team Skeet.
This was you with Naomi Starr, Alana bloom A, Crystal Davis,
and the incredibly lucky David Lee that day. Apparently, when
you do a scene with multiple women and one guy,
do you ever get bored off to the side if
you're not tied into the action, Like I'm looking at
this picture here and you're all in the action here,
but at some point you're sitting at that table just
playing checkers or whatever it is you guys are doing.
What are you doing? If it's one of those scenes
where I'm not directly tied in, maybe the directors not going,
you know, hey, kiss her or mess around with her
this and that. Do you just kind of just sit
off there looking all beautiful naked and not doing anything.
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, I'm so desperately wanting to watch. That's
the truth, because sometimes, you know, we're forced to not
watch and act like, hey, nothing's going on. Right. I
guess apparently that's supposed to make this scene like hotter.
So that's what's going on in my mind.
Speaker 1: Okay, okay, okay, I aboard it all.
Speaker 2: I'm like, oh my god, I want to watch that.
Speaker 1: The second clip, clip, video, screenshot, whatever you want to
call it. I have here from you is from kink. Now.
Did you have to be slowly talked into bondage and
kink playing or was that something you were kind of
excited to jump into. How did you work your way
up to that? Because and again, and if I'm overstepping here,
please let me know. With this stuff you said, it
almost feels like you gained your control back through webcamming,
but this is again another total loss of control. What
put you in a position to be well, positions the
wrong word to use there, But what put you in
the spot to be able to be comfortable with then
approaching those types of scenes and being willing to do them?
Speaker 2: Mm hmmm. Actually webcamming really changed my mindset about everything,
so I when it comes to bondage and all that,
I actually my favorite fetish is BDSM And I say
I'm a I'm a switch naturally a sub, but I
prefer to be dominant. So being tied up and just
fully allowing someone to take it whatever they want feels
so freeing and refreshing for me, Like just to be like, okay,
I'm giving everything to you, to trust that you will
read my body well and that you will give me
full pleasure, and just having that ability really, what can
I say? It Just it's so freeing.
Speaker 1: Did you did you know your limits already going into
shooting something like that or was it a process working
with the director saying I think I'd be comfortable with this.
Did you have to pull back at all while doing
any shoots? Yes?
Speaker 2: Yeah, there was one shoot that I has traumatized me.
Oh man, so this you know one of he was
a like producer and the actor. He said, hey, do
you want to do you do needle play? And I
have never heard of needle play. I was like what
I was like, and in my mind was stupid me.
I didn't ask questions, but in my mind I thought
it was like occupuncture, and I thought, oh, you know,
that sounds pretty cool, you know, like I'm thinking occupuncture
all over my little tits and being fucked. I'm like, yeah,
I think I would be open to that but I
didn't ask what needle play was. I just assumed what
it was. So he says, well, before we do it
on camera, let's just give it a try. I'm like, okay.
So he grabs a needle. The whole time I'm thinking
it's occupuncture. He grabs my nipple, pulls my nipple, and
boom right through the the Yeah, the nipple right, and
I'm screaming because in my mind it wasn't what I
thought it was.
Speaker 1: In your mind, you just got stabbed in the tit.
I mean, like, you know, if you were on the
street and that happened, that's a felony.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so I freak out. I said no, no, no, no, no,
I do not like this. So apparently I didn't know
that I was traumatized until after this scene because I
used to love my nipples being played with. Now I
don't touch there. I am like, I do not like
to be touched in my nipples. It hurts every time
someone even tries to touch it. It's very painful. And I
realize it's from that moment I haven't traumatized, and I
don't know to reprogram my mind.
Speaker 1: Wow, geez oh, I couldn't even imagine that. Well, let
me ask you the inverse of that. Was there any
limit you set early on that you eventually not gave
in but decided to try a little bit and you
realized you liked it or no.
Speaker 2: A lot. So I used to I have this rule
that if I only do what I enjoy as a sub,
that I will do to another sub when I'm domb
And so I had I had these submissives who wanted
me to verbally abuse them, and so I was like,
you know, let me give this to try. And so
I had these doms as a webcam model start to
verbally abuse me. And can I just say, I used
to be so sensitive. I will cry about everything you
say one one thing about me, you look at me wrong,
I will just take it so personal. I was so insecure,
I mean really really bad until I started doing a
verbal abuse in webcamming and shifted my mindset to taking
things personable to getting so horny. Yeah. So it worked
out perfectly because, as you know, time went and I
started growing in fame, and I go back to when
your people love you and people hate you, that when
people hate me and they talk crap about me, write articles,
all I do is grab my had tachi and.
Speaker 1: I yeah, I just I'm definitely not a submissive in
my own life or with my wife or anything. But
I can't imagine just being mean to a woman. That's
all the you know, I still hold doors and call
people ma'am. I've almost called you mam on this episode.
You're younger than me. I just want to point that out.
But uh no, I'm glad. I'm glad you learned how
to process that because I'm still working on it. Because
I won't say a mean thing to want unless she
cuts me off in traffic. Then I'm out the window
screaming you need to learn how to drive, get off
the road. Shit like that. The third scene I have
for you here, now, this is a crazy one. Uh uh.
This is a scene from Girls' Way. Now. I've been
to water parks before, but I haven't seen anything quite
like this. You're a full on hydrant here. From what
I can tell, How did you did you learn how
to squirt while you were in porn? Or was that
something maybe you discovered in your life and then you
were like, hey, this is a skill I can bring
over to this.
Speaker 2: Yeah, webcamming is my gateway. So I was on a website.
My first webcam site was flirt for Free, and I
noticed all the top models were squirters. And so my
story is, I said, hey, I went into my room
one day, my cam room, and I said, who wants
to teach me how to squirt? And one of the
viewers said, hey, I taught my wife how to squirt.
I could teach you. Said right on, okay, let's do this,
and so I just remember being in my cam room
and everyone was like cheering me on. I was in
anticipation and this viewer just kept guiding me what to do,
and I was scared that I was not going to
be able to do it. I've heard all these rumors
not everyone can squirt. I'm like, what if I can't
do it? So I just remember ten minutes going by,
fifteen Eventually twenty minutes went by, and finally I did
my first let's see, oh one footer, and the whole
room cheered.
Speaker 1: And now that's a skill of yours. Now you can
replicate that skill and make it even better. Huh you're
thrown one hundred mile an hour fastballs now? Yes?
Speaker 2: Yes, so you know I practice. When you're a webcam model,
you practice every day, several times a day, so I
got really really good at squirting and I can squirt
on command.
Speaker 1: I'm not asking this as a uh, I'm not asking
this as a recommendation as much as I am just
wondering your subjective opinion. Girls that are getting into the
industry now that just jump right on of and again
you should have that, and you should have all your
channels set up and everything else. Would you recommend webcamming
at first so they can kind of get a sense
and comfort of what people are looking for their specific look,
what type of fetish or whatever else might you know
be associated with that. Do you think it's a good
like training camp for getting into more sex work later
on down the road.
Speaker 2: Absolutely, because it's the safest one. You aren't interacting with anybody,
and if you don't like someone who's in your cam room,
you can just span them and you get to choose
your hours and you're your own boss. And so for me,
webcamming was one of those things that help me understand
every single fetish and I felt comfortable because I was
in my own safe room, rather than maybe you might
be talking to someone in person and you might get
creepy vibes or something. Unfortunately, some bad things could happen.
So for me, webcaming definitely helps me learn so much
and I felt safe at the same time.
Speaker 1: Gotcha, gotcha.
Speaker 2: And also I feel like as a newly AF girl,
if you don't have a fan base, you know, AF
doesn't promote you. So this is the best way to
be promoted because whatever site you choose will promote you
and bring fans to you. And that's a good start
to developing fans and also learning and making money at
the same time.
Speaker 1: Yeah, makes sense, makes sense, all right. I want to
move into my part three here, so let me just
say I went to preschool to eighth grade, Catholic school, Communion,
all of that stuff. By the way, I didn't know
Catholics were disliked, or I didn't know Protestants were disliked
or Presbyterians or anything else. I just I was just like, oh,
we all believe in Jesus. That's fine, right.
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 1: Then you know, teen years hit and I move away
from it a little bit. You want to be the rebel,
you want to say, oh man, I'm an atheist. This
and that you hit later in life and you go,
you know what, I spent a lot of time fucking
pretending like I didn't believe in anything. And every time
someone got into a car accident, and every time when
my brother was in the hospital dying, I looked up
and I said, hey, help please, you know, And and
I hate to say this, and I will not I
won't make this political at all. And people can have
their own opinions and whatever it is. But and this
will be controversial. I'm sure I don't mean it to be.
Didn't believe political views, didn't agree with this, this and that.
But watching Charlie Kirk get killed this year again, you
can have your opinion about political views, this and that.
He was a man of God. And when that happened,
I watched that on Twitter about two hundred times that
day and I thought to myself, I really can't go
around thinking he's not going somewhere else after this, Like
I really I need to hope for for him and
for everyone else that goes through such tragedy and terrible
things in life that it's not just lights out, you know.
And it's always been in my head. So can I
ask you, how what is what's your brand of Christianity?
What would it be represented by him. What are some
of the core, most important morals of it? Because Catholic's
got all kinds of rules, and my thing's always been,
we're gonna hit him with the golden rule. Okay, I'm
gonna be respectful to you. I'm gonna hope you're gonna
be respectful to me. What are your tenants or what
do you base your faith on?
Speaker 2: Mm hmm the greatest commandments, which is love God and
love people, sure at all and how people want to
elaborate on that is all theological. But I believe in
God's grace and I believe you know, as long as
you accept Christ, you know you're going you're going to Heaven.
That's That's where I'm at. And my job on this
earth is to love God and love people. And that
means no matter how messed up you are, no matter
if you're an adult worker, you're gay, lesbian, you're a murderer,
you're homeless, your drug addict, it doesn't matter. I'm just
going to love you where you're at, and that's where
I stand. And you know what, unfortunately, I don't see
that in the church. I feel like the unfortunately the
church is if you don't live by this. I'm not
going to love you where you're at. Sure, And I'm like,
I'm sorry, I believe differently, And I get so many
people who don't agree with me, but I I'm like,
you know what, it's okay to disagree and with each other,
but let's just love each other because at the end
of the day, where if you're a Christian, you know,
let's we're all going to the same place.
Speaker 1: Sure, yeah, yeah, And I think that's kind of what
I got out of it too, is just let's, you know,
just try and be better people. And again with the Catholics,
there's all kinds of rules. You got to hit this
thing and do this and do that and whatever the
organized religion of it. My thought is always, you know,
if Hitler confessed before he died, I still don't think
he was making it to heaven. And if I don't confess,
but I lived my life really trying to be a
decent human being, really trying to take care of people,
not being malicious towards people. I think I'm good. I
think I'll get in as long as I keep working
forward towards that. So you kind of touched on it
there a little bit, but it makes sense, do you
not necessary? So okay, my question here was how do
you square it in your mind the contradiction from doing
adult film and also the church. But it almost sounds
like you're not a big fan of church establishment establishment
rather than just the religion and the faith itself. Is
that accurate or is that wrong? No?
Speaker 2: I love the church. I mean I go to church
when I have time. I just feel like the mindsets
of most churches is that they live too much by
the law and when Jesus came and died on the cross,
where save through grace, it's you know, So that's where
I'm at. I feel like the move a big portion
of it is we've lost the grace that that you know,
is said in the Bible. So again, I don't hate
the church at all. I go to church myself when
I have time. Yeah. Is that the church?
Speaker 1: Well, I don't necessarily mean the church as in the building.
I mean more the people in organized religions who maybe
lose sight of the main principles and worry more about
you know, when I see politicians involved with politics or
no I'm sorry, pastors or priests or anyone else involved
in politics or pushing for this, or kick this out
or do that. I almost want to say, like, go
back to what Jesus would recommend here. You know, Jesus
wasn't like we need rest all sex workers, and he
had Mary Magdalene and you know he cared for her
and everything else. So I just think what I meant
by that is not you don't like walking into a church.
I meant more, it's you have more faith in Jesus
and God himself rather than the rules and everything else
that might be set by man. In God's name, I
would say, is that accurate? Am I crazy? Maybe I'm crazy?
It's fine if I am.
Speaker 2: Oh, no, no, I guess I honor the law, which
you know, that's where all the rules and regulations are,
and I understand them, and I understand that the law
is what helps us understand what sin is. But I
do also understand that Jesus came to fulfill the law.
So we don't I can't. I don't want to say
we don't we Well, our salvation is not canceled by
our actions, right, is what I mean? Do we should?
We still apply the law? Like and this is where
I say this, it's on everyone's on conviction and we
constantly are working out our salvation, and that salvation doesn't
look like well, if you mess up, you instantly lose
your salvation. Salvation to me, when the Bible talks about
that is it's more like you're in training to be
more like Christ, but you never actually lose your salvation,
gotcha until you you know? And and what I mean
by that is that every single Christian, every single person
on this planet, all has some type of struggle. One
person struggle might be sexual. Another person struggle might be overeating.
Another person's struggle could be I don't know, overworking. Another
person struggle could be unforgiveness with people that their family
did to them twenty years ago. That's considered also a sin.
But we're all working out our salvation to go through
the process of, Hey, I struggle with, oh, you know,
eating too much, so I'm going to go on a
diet plan. You're working out that. I don't know if
that kind of makes sense.
Speaker 1: No, it does. It makes total sense to me. But
you are a porn star and the first two you
hit were sex addiction and then overeating, And I was like,
is she talking about me?
Speaker 2: There?
Speaker 1: No, I'm just kidding I'm fucking with you. I'm just kidding.
I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding.
Speaker 2: I do.
Speaker 1: Here's a question, though, has has any director or producer
ever tried to bring any kind of religious iconology into
any of your scenes. Dress you up like a nun,
do something like that.
Speaker 2: Go ahead, yes, yeah, I just shot a scene too,
Oh my gosh, two months ago and I was like,
I told the director, I said, I'm so sorry, I
cannot do this part. And what it was the original
piece and I'm so glad. Actually these director and producers
were also Christian, and they they were like, it's okay,
you don't have to do this. But the scene was
I played a witch. And when I originally read the script,
I thought it was like like the neighbor Karen, Like
that's what I interpreted this this script, you know, and
they were just using the word rich witch rather than
I didn't realize it was a spiritual witch.
Speaker 1: Sure, okay.
Speaker 2: So I was like, okay, so I'm you know, it
was a scene where so the end of the scene
that I said I cannot do was they had a
voodoo doll and they said that I needed to play
with myself and put my comm on the voodoo doll
and make it whatever, like I'm casting some wicked spell
on these kids who decided to trespass in my neighbor
I mean, in my backyard to grab their baseball right
after I fucked them.
Speaker 1: Quite the scene there, Quite the scene. So then what
were you able to I mean, were you just out
on that? Were they able to adjust and make it
more comfortable for you?
Speaker 2: They adjusted to more of the interpretation of which as
an I'm like the neighbor Karen, rather than the spiritual
being of I'm going to cast a spell on you
and actually literally have a voodoo doll in my hands.
Speaker 1: I do have. As this follow up though, was it
supposed to be a Halloween scene or something or was
it just a random Tuesday They're like, we need some
satanic stuff in here. Yeah.
Speaker 2: See. The weird thing is I felt like the whoever
is the writer kind of did it mockingly on purpose,
because the director when I approached her and said, I
don't feel comfortable doing this little line. Can I just
take this out? And she's like, oh, that's weird because
they know you're a pastor, And that to me like
kind of stung me a little bit because it was
like I felt like, whoever is the writers kind of
wanted to push me my comfort level. It's one thing
where you write a script, but if you know who
the actor is, that's that's a different story.
Speaker 1: Yeah. That again, I'll use the word that that almost
feels a little malicious, like I want to see her
say this.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, But I'm just so grateful because I just remember,
like my heart pounding, like, oh my God, like I
read this interpretation of this script wrong.
Speaker 1: Last question I have for you here and then I
just want to one quick social media thing, But who
is more judgmental of the other side? Are the porn
people more against the religious side or the religious side
more against the porn Let me ask you, like in
your daily conversation, if you interact with anyone or talk
to anyone, and if it ever pops up, who is
more judgmental of the other.
Speaker 2: The religious for sure?
Speaker 1: Really?
Speaker 2: Really, yes, yeah, there are much more. When everyone turned
against me, it was only the religious people, and I
went through this really really difficult time where my husband
ended up in prison, and the only people that show
no grace, no kindness was a religious people, And the
only people that reached out to me. Happened to be
adult workers that said, hey, are you okay? How are
you doing? And I you know that that hurt me.
But do I hate the religious people? Know? Because my
journey is I used to be one until I crossed
over and became an adult worker, and that's when I
learned to love people where they're at. And so also
my story is being a Christian and being also a
porn star. I realized, wow, now I'm learning to love
like Christ. He loves people where they're at. But before
I was an adult worker, I was one of those
religious people. And I feel like people are scared and
they judge when they don't know, and so I cannot.
For a while, I got angry, but I have to
remind myself I was one of them one time, and
so I need to show grace because they just don't know.
Speaker 1: Christy Love my guest for the evening. You know exactly
where you can find her at CLCA six'. Nine her new,
podcast In bed With Christy love is available now on
YouTube and anywhere you get. Podcasts links to everything are
in the episode, description social media all the other fun.
Stuff head down there and check it. Out, christy thank
you so much for talking with me. Today it's such a.
Pleasure it was a pleasure to talk to you AND
i wish you nothing but success going.
Speaker 2: Forward okay you Say. Lettie