Speaker 1: This is Gary and Shannon and you're listening to KFI
Speaker 1: AM six forty, the Gary and Shannon Show on demand
Speaker 1: on the iHeartRadio app.
Speaker 2: Let's talk about hurricanes.
Speaker 3: Hurricane Helene will's strengthen into a hurricane. It's right now
Speaker 3: tropical storm, but eighty mile an hour sustained winds hurricane
Speaker 3: force gusts have been measured in some places. They're talking
Speaker 3: about this right now, still northeast northeast, say of Cosamel,
Speaker 3: but making its way through the Gulf of Mexico up
Speaker 3: towards the Florida coastline. We're expecting parts of the western
Speaker 3: part of the Florida Panhandle is where it's it's expected
Speaker 3: to make landfall some point. The Big Bend area is
Speaker 3: what they're calling it. The vast majority. I think sixty
Speaker 3: seven counties in Florida, and sixty four of them are
Speaker 3: under some sort of watch or warning as a result
Speaker 3: of this. Some of those early bands of rain have
Speaker 3: already spread as far north as South Florida as a
Speaker 3: result of this.
Speaker 4: Hey, Gary Trucker branded here. I remember going to an
Speaker 4: A's game up in the Coliseum. Had the best time
Speaker 4: Craft stadium.
Speaker 5: Great game.
Speaker 4: Also remember going to see Aretha Franklin and Prince over
Speaker 4: at Oracle Arena back then and had the best time.
Speaker 4: Gonna miss those people, gonna miss those places. It was
Speaker 4: a great time.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Well, there is a new report that details a stunning
Speaker 1: Secret Service leadership mess.
Speaker 6: That's where we kick off swamp watch.
Speaker 5: Swamp is horrible, The government doesn't work.
Speaker 7: Make it like a reality TV sho bad deus.
Speaker 2: Always a pleasure to be anywhere from Washington, d C. Hey, Joe.
Speaker 8: A town hall too, clearly built on a swamp in
Speaker 8: so many ways, still a swamp to watching.
Speaker 5: Malarkey said, dream the swamp. I said, Oh, that's so,
Speaker 5: I'll keep you know the thing.
Speaker 1: So there was a mypartisan Senate that released a report
Speaker 1: today that says Secret Service agents failed to take charge
Speaker 1: of decision making for security at the rally where Trump
Speaker 1: was shot in July. There were key lapses in preparation
Speaker 1: and communication that day. The locals were on a separate
Speaker 1: frequency than the Secret Service. The guy running the drones
Speaker 1: had no experience and was on the phone with tech support.
Speaker 1: It's a what is it called the Keystone cops.
Speaker 6: That's what this sounds like.
Speaker 2: Some of the problems.
Speaker 3: They also pointed out the failure to set up visual
Speaker 3: barriers around the rally that might have blocked the view
Speaker 3: from the rooftop all the way to.
Speaker 2: Where the president was.
Speaker 1: Joe Cahill is on the story and joins us now
Speaker 1: with more details about this report.
Speaker 6: Joe, how are you say?
Speaker 8: Good?
Speaker 5: How are you guys great?
Speaker 3: We're just going through some of these things, some of
Speaker 3: the very very simple measures that appeared should have been
Speaker 3: taken that weren't taken.
Speaker 2: So who's the one person to blame?
Speaker 8: You know, I don't think that there is any one person.
Speaker 2: I think it was.
Speaker 8: You have to look at the leadership, generally, the advanced
Speaker 8: team that goes in ahead of time before any other
Speaker 8: major event and tries to do the pre planning. We've
Speaker 8: heard that the acting director of the Ciccret Service actually
Speaker 8: told me last week that there were some people who
Speaker 8: are going to be held accountable. And we pressed, is
Speaker 8: that is that being fired? And he said held accountable.
Speaker 8: So we think that that's going to happen. But look,
Speaker 8: it's really hard to point to one thing. That's why
Speaker 8: lawmakers that we talked to are so surprised shot appalled
Speaker 8: by this because they look at it and say, if
Speaker 8: there were one mistake or two mistakes, it's something they
Speaker 8: would more easily digest. But this was a failure on
Speaker 8: multiple levels before the event, during the event, and in
Speaker 8: those crucial moments ahead of the time that Trump got shot.
Speaker 8: That really makes this almost hard to believe.
Speaker 3: One of the things that the Senate did was voted
Speaker 3: to make sure that protectees will get the same level
Speaker 3: of protection that an active president or an a sorry,
Speaker 3: an actual president would have. So if you've got Protection
Speaker 3: Equality Bill that make sure that Kamala Harris and Donald
Speaker 3: Trump have the same kind of protection that Joe Biden
Speaker 3: would have as the sitting president. Is that going to
Speaker 3: impact the campaign and the ability of candidates to actually
Speaker 3: move about the country.
Speaker 8: That's a great question. So the Secret Service says no.
Speaker 8: They say that doesn't mean that their lifestyles or that
Speaker 8: their campaigning events are going to change. What that means
Speaker 8: is they do what they want to do, and it
Speaker 8: is on us to figure out, no matter what their
Speaker 8: activities are, how we can protect them. Now, if you're wondering, well,
Speaker 8: we don't have much faith in the agency to do
Speaker 8: that at this point. You know, that is also a
Speaker 8: concern that many lawmakers. We brought up. The Secret Service says, no,
Speaker 8: that they're not going to You know, they can do
Speaker 8: what they want, and the task before the agency is
Speaker 8: you got to protect him at all costs. Here, I
Speaker 8: want to point out one thing in the report, if
Speaker 8: I can, that really amazed me. It jumped out and
Speaker 8: I read the whole thing this morning, cover to cover.
Speaker 8: The thing that stood out most was in the middle
Speaker 8: of it. If you're reading the reports, about page fifty
Speaker 8: five fifty six, I think they have an interview with
Speaker 8: the sniper teams lead that day, and he basically describes
Speaker 8: the moment that local officers on the ground saw Thomas
Speaker 8: Crooks climb this building and get into position with a gun.
Speaker 8: He saw officers local officers reacting to that. He says,
Speaker 8: I was watching as they put their hands on their
Speaker 8: guns and ran towards the buildings. And so the Senate committee,
Speaker 8: who's asking this team lead these questions, says, at that point,
Speaker 8: wasn't it enough that you knew there was something concerning
Speaker 8: to pull Donald Trump off stage? And he said no,
Speaker 8: because we didn't know. It could have been a medical emergency,
Speaker 8: could have also been a man with a gun. And
Speaker 8: the committee asked, well, if it was even a possibility
Speaker 8: that it was a man with a gun. You wouldn't
Speaker 8: even consider calling off the former president from the stage
Speaker 8: he was on. And the response was, well, it didn't
Speaker 8: even cross our mind to do that.
Speaker 5: That amazed me that there.
Speaker 8: Wasn't even a consideration and that he said so much
Speaker 8: to the committee. It just blew me away reading that.
Speaker 1: And why isn't there a separation of a medical emergency
Speaker 1: versus someone with a gun? Those should be two different alerts.
Speaker 8: Yeah, and you know therein lies another problem, which was communication.
Speaker 8: There were law enforcement on the ground at the local
Speaker 8: level that were flagging there is a person with a
Speaker 8: gun climbing the roof, and they were on their radios,
Speaker 8: but the Secret Service was not on the same frequency
Speaker 8: as the local officers on the ground out and I'm
Speaker 8: told that is actually a regular thing. They don't want
Speaker 8: to clog up each other's communication. But usually what happens
Speaker 8: is there's one command center that's hearing all of this. Yes,
Speaker 8: and if the command center says, hey, the local guys
Speaker 8: see a man with a gun, that immediately gets to
Speaker 8: the Secret Service agents who are around Donald Trump. And
Speaker 8: that didn't happen in this case. Instead, of one command center,
Speaker 8: they had two separate ones which were not communicating with
Speaker 8: each other, another major failure of many that is laid
Speaker 8: out in this report today.
Speaker 2: All right, Joe, thanks for your time. We appreciate it,
Speaker 2: of course, happy to do it.
Speaker 3: Joe Khalil again, Washington correspondent there for News Nation on
Speaker 3: the heels of what we talked about in the first
Speaker 3: segment of Swamp Watch, which was this congressional report that
Speaker 3: came out that detailed some of the failings of law
Speaker 3: enforcement and secret Service in the Butler, Pennsylvania assassination attempt
Speaker 3: on former President Trump. He also spoke about that today
Speaker 3: while he was doing a rally in North Carolin.
Speaker 7: Really, why is it that the father of the shooter
Speaker 7: in the Butler instance has one of the best and
Speaker 7: most expensive lawyers in the entire state of Pennsylvania. How
Speaker 7: did he get to this expensive lawyer, big big law firm,
Speaker 7: the biggest in Pittsburgh. Where did he get this big
Speaker 7: law firm from? It's so strange. If I were president
Speaker 7: and a former president and a leading candidate, I'm the
Speaker 7: leading candidate by far to be the next president.
Speaker 2: And hold for applause, please jeez.
Speaker 7: That leading candidate was under threat. I was president and
Speaker 7: the candidate was under threat, any candidate, Republican or Democrat.
Speaker 2: And by the way, I want to thank the.
Speaker 7: Democrats because they just increased funding for the Secret Service,
Speaker 7: who worked very hard. They increased funding for the Secret Service.
Speaker 7: And nobody will believe this. It was a unanimous vote. Republicans,
Speaker 7: every single Republican, every single Democrat president voted in favor.
Speaker 7: That was a first unanimous vote.
Speaker 2: Get what would you do if you were president.
Speaker 7: And that's to increase the funding, yes, of the Secret Service.
Speaker 7: So I thank everybody.
Speaker 9: Back to the teleprompter, please, But if I were the president,
Speaker 9: I would inform the threatening country in this case Iran,
Speaker 9: that if you do anything to harm this person, we
Speaker 9: are going to blow your largest cities and the country
Speaker 9: itself to smitherines.
Speaker 7: We're going to blow it to smitherings.
Speaker 2: You can't do that.
Speaker 6: I was wondering how he's gonna end that sentence.
Speaker 3: He also said big threats on my life by Iran.
Speaker 3: The entire US military is watching and waiting. He wrote
Speaker 3: that on truth Social He said moves were already made
Speaker 3: by Iran that didn't work out, but they will try again.
Speaker 3: Not a good situation for anything.
Speaker 1: I'm surrounded by more men, guns and weapons than I
Speaker 1: have ever seen before. Okay, So, and Biden told the
Speaker 1: co hosts of the View that he did not sense
Speaker 1: an overwhelming reluctance from Democrats about his reelection effort.
Speaker 6: Says he was confident he could have beat Donald Trump.
Speaker 7: Wow.
Speaker 1: Sarah Griffin asked about Pelosi and about the pressure she
Speaker 1: put on Democrats to urge him to drop out, and
Speaker 1: he actually had pretty natural moment of everything's fine, and
Speaker 1: then he just goes.
Speaker 10: It makes sense. There are some folks who would like
Speaker 10: to see me step aside so they have a chance
Speaker 10: to move on. I get that that's just human nature.
Speaker 10: But that wasn't the reason that I stepped down. I
Speaker 10: stepped down because I started thinking about it.
Speaker 3: He again, I don't know if you're a candidate like
Speaker 3: that and you're surround I know he's the president, but
Speaker 3: if you're a candidate and you're running for president or
Speaker 3: any major seat like that, you've got people around you
Speaker 3: who are going to lie to you about your chances
Speaker 3: of win. After the debate, after the assassination attempt, Joe
Speaker 3: Biden was going to drop so precipitously in those polls
Speaker 3: that it wasn't It was not going to be close.
Speaker 3: It was not going to be anywhere close to what
Speaker 3: he imagined an actual what he imagined the election was
Speaker 3: going to be, because you could not argue that all
Speaker 3: of the momentum was behind Trump after those two events,
Speaker 3: all of the momentum had Joe Biden gone into Chicago
Speaker 3: at the convention and tried to deliver the closing argument,
Speaker 3: tried to deliver the speech that was going to rouse
Speaker 3: all of the party and draw all of those independent
Speaker 3: voters who didn't quite want to vote for Donald Trump
Speaker 3: but thought that there was a better He's completely delusional
Speaker 3: at that point. And I'm surprised that he's doing interviews. Yeah,
Speaker 3: I mean, Kamala Harris has finally apparently decided she will
Speaker 3: do an interview. I'll let you guess which network it is.
Speaker 6: CNN, no ABC, no CBS.
Speaker 3: Get more obscure and left than that, I don't know, MSNBC.
Speaker 2: Ah, they're going to do.
Speaker 3: Stephanie Rule is going to be the one who interviews her,
Speaker 3: and it's going to be a lot of like Drew
Speaker 3: Barrymore's we need a Mama La, Right, now it's going
Speaker 3: to be that kind of interview.
Speaker 1: I heard some recent clips of her, and she's back
Speaker 1: into word salad mood.
Speaker 2: Because no one asks me.
Speaker 6: No one's replaying it.
Speaker 3: If Oprah's the one asking her the questions, Oprah's never
Speaker 3: going to press in and go wait a minute. Okay,
Speaker 3: you said a lot of things in forty five seconds,
Speaker 3: But what exactly are you.
Speaker 2: Going to do?
Speaker 8: Right?
Speaker 6: Would you like your Jeopardy question? How about that? Cheer
Speaker 6: you up a little bit.
Speaker 5: Right there? Oh?
Speaker 6: Why isn't that all? We're going to be ready?
Speaker 1: Time to fall into autumn for one thousand dollars fall
Speaker 1: from the Latin.
Speaker 6: For fall off.
Speaker 1: This adjective describe trees that lose their leaves in the.
Speaker 2: Fall, trees that lose their leaves in the floor.
Speaker 1: Missus Twillager is not happy now.
Speaker 6: Trees that lose their leaves?
Speaker 2: Why are you mad at me?
Speaker 6: Deciduous?
Speaker 5: What is it? I didn't I'm not you.
Speaker 2: Can't at the answer when.
Speaker 6: The something right away from Missus Twilliger. And now she's
Speaker 6: rolling over in her graves somewhere.
Speaker 3: I think I just saw my first glimpse of miss Patricia.
Speaker 6: Justin Worsham is host of the Dad podcast.
Speaker 2: I like that, and I was waiting for you to see.
Speaker 5: What I was.
Speaker 6: I'm like everyone everywhere.
Speaker 11: I'm still in my head about our off air conversation,
Speaker 11: just just imagining such a manly Justine exists there.
Speaker 5: It's altered the universe. It's just this.
Speaker 3: If they if they're going to remake that movie Multiplicity with.
Speaker 11: Michael exactly, I need to revisit that. I've revisited mister Mom.
Speaker 11: And that's a that's a good one.
Speaker 6: Problem right there.
Speaker 5: That's what I never had. Mister Mom was such a
Speaker 5: good movie.
Speaker 3: Did you and your wife talk about childcare? Like, how
Speaker 3: are you guys going to handle it?
Speaker 5: Or No?
Speaker 11: It was never because I was so unemployed, that's true.
Speaker 11: No schedules allowed for no, honestly. I mean when they
Speaker 11: were infants, Yes I was.
Speaker 5: I was.
Speaker 11: I was building my stand up career at that point,
Speaker 11: and anytime I had a road gig as my schedule
Speaker 11: is getting busier. Natalie was so successful working at the
Speaker 11: bank that they would let her work from home before
Speaker 11: that was even a thing, and so and then eventually
Speaker 11: we started taking the kids to like a preschool, and
Speaker 11: weirdly enough, though not because.
Speaker 5: Of the cost our preschool.
Speaker 11: At most for two kids to go there, I think
Speaker 11: it was five days a week for a few hours,
Speaker 11: was like nine hundred bucks a month. I did some
Speaker 11: research and the average cost here in LA because this
Speaker 11: article that I found is saying that people are spending
Speaker 11: eighty thousand dollars fifty thousand dollars for two children, eighty
Speaker 11: thousand dollars for triplets, fifty thousand dollars for two children.
Speaker 11: In different areas like Chicago and the Carolinas, on average,
Speaker 11: people are spending twenty percent of their annual income on childcare.
Speaker 11: But here in Los Angeles it ranges from two hundred
Speaker 11: and sixty bucks a month up to four thy two
Speaker 11: hundred and twenty dollars a month, which averages about fifteen
Speaker 11: hundred a month, which and they're saying it. It's also
Speaker 11: people are paying more for childcare in America than they
Speaker 11: are for their rent, which is.
Speaker 6: Kind of sense.
Speaker 11: I know what makes sense, But it shouldn't right, Like
Speaker 11: that shouldn't we shouldn't be so like yeah, get well.
Speaker 3: And I remember this would have been early inn our
Speaker 3: parenting career, so it's twenty plus years ago. But we
Speaker 3: watched Dateline or twenty twenty or something like that, one
Speaker 3: of the larger news magazine programs, and they discussed that
Speaker 3: cost of childcare versus the cost of one of the
Speaker 3: parents that come home.
Speaker 5: Yeah, and.
Speaker 3: Almost without fail, it was cheaper for a parent to
Speaker 3: be home, lose that income from whatever job it was
Speaker 3: then to have both parents working, and then shoving all
Speaker 3: of that money into childcare. That's still true because you've
Speaker 3: got the I'm sure I shouldn't say because but and
Speaker 3: you have the impact of having a parent around all
Speaker 3: the time.
Speaker 1: I have a friend whose husband she out earns him,
Speaker 1: she's the breadwinner, and her husband did that he stopped
Speaker 1: working because they would save money he wasn't making as much,
Speaker 1: and they would save a bunch of childcare for two kids,
Speaker 1: and recently has gone needed to go back to work.
Speaker 1: Because that's a hard thing to ask. That is a
Speaker 1: really hard thing to ask of a mother or a
Speaker 1: father to stay home with the kids and not have
Speaker 1: that satisfaction of earning money, going somewhere, having adult interactions
Speaker 1: all the things right, especially for a man, I think
Speaker 1: biologically speaking, and I don't know that's probably sexist to say,
Speaker 1: but especially for a man to be able to bring
Speaker 1: home money. I think it's even harder for them, not
Speaker 1: you justin but every other man in America to be
Speaker 1: the state.
Speaker 2: Did use a keyword there what you said. I don't
Speaker 2: think it was empty dome.
Speaker 6: I'm sorry, but you did open the segment.
Speaker 5: Choice.
Speaker 1: But anyway, recently he went back to workship because he
Speaker 1: did need that, like he needed he needed to go
Speaker 1: back to work and and there, and they're paying through
Speaker 1: the nose. I mean, the kids are older now, so
Speaker 1: it's not as you know, labor intensive as when they
Speaker 1: were little, but still.
Speaker 6: It's just so driving them around to practices and things is.
Speaker 5: Just well, and that's all.
Speaker 11: We could talk even more about that, I think in
Speaker 11: the next segment, because they're about the other article about
Speaker 11: just people being way too stressed about parenting.
Speaker 5: But I think this is part of the childcare thing.
Speaker 11: Definitely is a thing in my experience when the kids
Speaker 11: are younger, as they get more into school, it gets
Speaker 11: a lot easier. I personally, this is what's weird about me.
Speaker 11: I loved being the stay at home mom, like I
Speaker 11: love that, like the whole thing about the role.
Speaker 5: I love everything about the gig.
Speaker 11: But I still wrestled with the idea that I was
Speaker 11: a sandback to my wife that I wasn't a real
Speaker 11: man because I couldn't bring home the majority of the money.
Speaker 11: Now things have completely reversed, and I don't know that
Speaker 11: I like it. I'm I don't know, being the man
Speaker 11: in the relationship. That kind of sucks a little bit.
Speaker 6: But a little bit of pressure.
Speaker 5: Can I make cookies and bread at home? I'm really
Speaker 5: good at it, all that pressure.
Speaker 11: Whenever she wants to, By the way, I am a
Speaker 11: very yeah, whenever she wants, guys, she barely.
Speaker 2: We'll come back.
Speaker 6: There is a new reports on the state of parenting
Speaker 6: in America. It's like sixty minutes.
Speaker 5: Yeah, you dailed it. You're doing great, thank you. Everybody's stressed.
Speaker 5: This I think goes off the heels you.
Speaker 11: We didn't get a chance to talk about it because
Speaker 11: when I came back, I talked about my debt's passing
Speaker 11: and then no, no, why I giggled at that. Sorry
Speaker 11: that but anyway, then the next week, you guys are gone,
Speaker 11: and so we kind of hit on a little bit.
Speaker 11: But the Surgeon General is basically put out like a
Speaker 11: warning like they put on cigarettes, saying, hey, maybe you
Speaker 11: shouldn't be a parent if you're not like up for
Speaker 11: it because it's very hard, which is fascinating to me
Speaker 11: on so many levels. But now they're talking about this
Speaker 11: new data that's showing the forty percent of US parents
Speaker 11: report that on most days they are so stressed they
Speaker 11: cannot function, which is interesting to me.
Speaker 8: Go for it.
Speaker 3: I want to push back on this too, because I mean,
Speaker 3: I'm not pushing back on the findings of the study.
Speaker 3: I am pushing back generally that we have allowed people
Speaker 3: to say things like I can't function.
Speaker 2: No, no, you can. You clearly can't.
Speaker 3: Your heart still beating, you're still drawing breath, You're not
Speaker 3: frozen in fear or ineptitude. You just want to say
Speaker 3: something that makes it sound like you're the victim of
Speaker 3: how awful your circumstances are.
Speaker 11: Yeah, we want to talk about how hard everything is.
Speaker 11: And there's there's trust me, there's lots of societal benefits
Speaker 11: of people being open about their struggles.
Speaker 1: Why is that that used to not be the case?
Speaker 1: It's a it's is it contagious too? Or people want
Speaker 1: to just struggle and they want to.
Speaker 11: That's yes, I think that they're they're definitely in the
Speaker 11: mindset that is now like, I really feel like there's
Speaker 11: I don't like it. I don't like the words that
Speaker 11: my brain tells me to use. But I do think
Speaker 11: that there's a lot of like a victim mindset of
Speaker 11: like I'm a victim of everything, and I think it's
Speaker 11: unfair to actual victims.
Speaker 5: That's right. My genuine opinion is that they're my kids.
Speaker 11: I have teachers tell my kid that they have ADHD,
Speaker 11: and I'm like, my kid doesn't have ADHD.
Speaker 5: He just doesn't want to do your garbage social studies assignment.
Speaker 5: That's it. That's not ADHD, And that's wildly.
Speaker 11: Disrespectful to people who actually struggle with ADHD or depression.
Speaker 6: It's just being a little boy.
Speaker 11: Yes's and again, you could call me an insensitive father.
Speaker 5: So you're blue in the face. I don't care. Yeah.
Speaker 3: But it also I mean that that labeling of something,
Speaker 3: or mislabeling perhaps of what your kid's behavioral issue is
Speaker 3: or lack of desire to do a homework assignment, then
Speaker 3: gives them the excuse for the rest of their adolescents
Speaker 3: where they're like, well, I I mean fourth grade, my
Speaker 3: teacher told me I was ADHD, and therefore I don't
Speaker 3: have to do the work because I can't.
Speaker 2: I famously ridiculously wrong.
Speaker 11: I famously got in trouble at a PTA meeting when
Speaker 11: my son was in kindergarten because we had a psychologist
Speaker 11: come and they were talking about kids who are experiencing
Speaker 11: stress in elementary school. And I was just sitting there
Speaker 11: like shaking my head, going but what like in elementary school?
Speaker 5: And they as long.
Speaker 1: As you have food to eat and a roof over
Speaker 1: your head, there's no stress.
Speaker 11: You don't have perspective, right, Like I've told my kids
Speaker 11: this a couple of times where I've just said, I go, Unfortunately,
Speaker 11: you've had a pretty good life and so therefore it's
Speaker 11: hard for you to understand what real struggle feels like
Speaker 11: you have to go through some adversity.
Speaker 8: Well.
Speaker 3: And there are parents who will put their stress on
Speaker 3: their kids, right, And I don't know if it's because
Speaker 3: they feel like they're keeping their kids informed about what
Speaker 3: life is really like, but they'll they'll use their kids to,
Speaker 3: I don't know, share their burdens, perhaps when the kids
Speaker 3: are not equipped to do that. So there I think
Speaker 3: there could be some instances where kids do have stress,
Speaker 3: but not from elementary school.
Speaker 1: I remember my mom working crazy hours as a nurse manager,
Speaker 1: and I remember her saying, you know, on more than
Speaker 1: one occasion, like, oh, I'm just so stressed.
Speaker 6: I'm just I've got to get this done. I've to
Speaker 6: get this done.
Speaker 1: And I never remember that permeating my my psyche or
Speaker 1: what have you. I remember thinking, oh, it.
Speaker 6: Sucks to have a job like that's how that was
Speaker 6: my takeaway adult.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I will take away.
Speaker 11: I will talk for a living. So I this is
Speaker 11: my personal theories. I've read a lot of books on
Speaker 11: parenting everything, and in the seventies there was this self
Speaker 11: esteem movement in parenting where the idea was to make
Speaker 11: your kid feel good about themselves. Those kids then grew
Speaker 11: up and found out it was hard to always feel
Speaker 11: good about yourself. And then it became about we've all
Speaker 11: heard the it happens a lot in TV and movies
Speaker 11: where it's like, oh, my father was emotionally unavailable. He
Speaker 11: never told me he loved me, he never told me
Speaker 11: he was proud of me, and even like, I've had
Speaker 11: conversations with my brother and my mom since my dad's passing,
Speaker 11: and it's shocking to me, but my dad's perception of
Speaker 11: that if he showed emotion as far as like sadness
Speaker 11: or tears. He saw that as weakness, which is not
Speaker 11: the man that I thought.
Speaker 5: I knew. That was not who I was. It's clearly
Speaker 5: not who I am. That's a father.
Speaker 11: But I think it starts there, right like if you're
Speaker 11: coming out of this, if you're being raised by somebody
Speaker 11: who doesn't feel things and sink thinks that if they had,
Speaker 11: because I felt this as a father, where if I
Speaker 11: start to feel like I showed them the chinks in
Speaker 11: my armor, then what I feel like I'm doing is
Speaker 11: I'm enabling them.
Speaker 5: I'm saying it's okay to not try hard.
Speaker 11: I'm saying it's okay to give up a little in
Speaker 11: any incident, which.
Speaker 5: Is not what I want.
Speaker 11: I want to hold them accountable in every possible way,
Speaker 11: to try to push them to be their best in
Speaker 11: a way I think a dad becomes a coach like
Speaker 11: that only twenty four to seven and there.
Speaker 5: Is a balance.
Speaker 11: But I feel like we've overcorrected and now everybody wants
Speaker 11: to talk about their feelings and their weaknesses, and then
Speaker 11: that becomes the thing to be proud of. But then
Speaker 11: nobody's really got this, Like pulling it up by your
Speaker 11: bootstraps and just suck it up. Buttercup mentality. It seems
Speaker 11: not nobody, but you know what I mean, Like the
Speaker 11: majority seems to be let's talk about our feelings and
Speaker 11: speak truth to power.
Speaker 2: M I don't like it like this.
Speaker 11: The examples of what to do in this article are
Speaker 11: take responsibility for telling your truth. Consider asking someone to
Speaker 11: look out for you. Consider group based intervention versus family
Speaker 11: based interventions, like you're you're pulling away from your family
Speaker 11: members for fear of judgment.
Speaker 5: Get in touch with your limits.
Speaker 6: I like any of this.
Speaker 5: Reframe your role as a parent. What the hell like?
Speaker 11: I honestly, and all of the experts that I talked
Speaker 11: to on the podcast would say, calm the f down,
Speaker 11: like just cut yourself flat, thinking you're overthinking it and
Speaker 11: this whole thing they can always say. The first line
Speaker 11: in most of these articles that I read about parenting
Speaker 11: is like in today's high demanding schedule of kids, and
Speaker 11: they're over like whelmed, Like scheduling stop, just stop. Your
Speaker 11: kid doesn't have to do everything. You know what they
Speaker 11: need to do. They need to sit down and have
Speaker 11: dinner with you and screw around and get to work
Speaker 11: at school.
Speaker 5: That's all. They don't have to do much more than that.
Speaker 6: But what is your truth?
Speaker 5: He up and get to work. There we go.
Speaker 6: That's what I want to hear.
Speaker 5: Read that the power there you get your chemistry work done.
Speaker 6: Son, I feel like we've done real work here today.
Speaker 11: I'm gonna go home and watch mister Mom Multiplicity first.
Speaker 11: Watch Multiplicity First. Not as good as mister Mom, but
Speaker 11: still I think, I think an underrated Michael Keaton vehicle.
Speaker 2: Yes, I will say that we lost her.
Speaker 5: She's staring at a corner of the clock. She's literally staring
Speaker 5: at the second tap.
Speaker 6: No, please, let's do more, Michael Keaton and so please.
Speaker 2: You've been listening to The Gary and Shannon Show.
Speaker 3: You can always hear us live on KFI AM six
Speaker 3: forty nine am to one pm every Monday through Friday,
Speaker 3: and anytime on demand on the iHeartRadio app.