Speaker 1: Let me finish. This is the first time I committed
Speaker 1: a hate crime. Maybe they'll jerk my dick off for it,
Speaker 1: you know, like something like that. Yeah, probably we've disgusted.
Speaker 1: I'm associate bath an th rested relationship, any trash ship.
Speaker 1: You're listening to your Worst Friend machine and Matt.
Speaker 2: I'm Matt.
Speaker 1: I'm joined today by my friend and co host, a
Speaker 1: man who refuses to leave his five pointy six million
Speaker 1: dollar Baltimore home if there was closed on to hang around.
Speaker 2: That's me.
Speaker 1: We gotta make it more like law and order. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna uh at my intro every week. I'm gonna rip
Speaker 1: it from the headlines, and I'm just gonna associate you
Speaker 1: with it.
Speaker 2: Now.
Speaker 1: I get a lot of my news from four chan,
Speaker 1: so it's probably gonna be you running a lot of
Speaker 1: child sex trafficking, brothels and underground tunnels and controlling weather
Speaker 1: lizards Yeah yeah, lizards. Uh. Follow us everywhere on Twitter
Speaker 1: and Instagram. At worst Friendcast go to patreon dot com
Speaker 1: slash worst friend Cast. You can get a bonus episode
Speaker 1: every week and access to everything ever record it entirely
Speaker 1: commercial free. Or you can go to your Worst friend
Speaker 1: dot com. I redid the website.
Speaker 2: By the way he showed it to me, I thought.
Speaker 1: Oh better, Yeah, I mean, this looks.
Speaker 2: Better than before.
Speaker 1: Junkie not good, but this looks good.
Speaker 2: That part's good. Yeah, I like this part.
Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, so people should go there.
Speaker 2: Yeah, go go check out the good parts of that website.
Speaker 2: You got to click around to see them.
Speaker 1: Yeah. If you see something shitty, just keep clicking and
Speaker 1: you'll get That's how That's how I, uh, the shitty
Speaker 1: town that we grew up next to. That is literally
Speaker 1: how I get home through it because I grew up
Speaker 1: driving through there pretty much, right, And my concept is
Speaker 1: always like, if it's a shitty area, you just keep
Speaker 1: driving and eventually you'll hit something that looks somewhat decent
Speaker 1: and you'll go, oh, I fucking remember it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, keep going. Eventually you'll hit the ocean for sure. Yes,
Speaker 2: thirty six blocks of row home then the ocean.
Speaker 1: So I don't know, if you know the house that
Speaker 1: you lived in in high school across the street they
Speaker 1: built a fucking walmart, right.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I remember you telling me that. Yeah. Yeah. Didn't
Speaker 2: someone get killed there recently?
Speaker 1: I don't know. I did pick Bland drew up with
Speaker 1: jen when the George Floyd riots were happening to drive
Speaker 1: past it, and they did. They had like thirty cop
Speaker 1: cars in the parking lot. They had spotlights and shit like,
Speaker 1: I we see you.
Speaker 2: You're not gonna blend into the night. Is that what
Speaker 2: they were doing?
Speaker 1: They have special glasses on that can see teeth in
Speaker 1: the darkness. Real well, those the ones that Dennis war
Speaker 1: Yeah or yeah, well, yes, those are what Dennis wear.
Speaker 1: But have you ever seen the sunglasses that look like
Speaker 1: those ones? But they're like HD glasses?
Speaker 2: Is HD glass? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Exactly? Hold on, hold on, hold on.
Speaker 2: He makes your vision four K. I'm not yeah, believe
Speaker 2: it or not. Your eyes see better than four K.
Speaker 1: Already, hold on these hold on. Oh that's a that's
Speaker 1: a guy putting them to the test. I don't want to.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, I'm I was being a fucking little
Speaker 2: prick here. Just this is this is a real product.
Speaker 1: You don't know. This is like a real fucking thing. Yeah,
Speaker 1: get night vision glasses. Hold on ready, I don't want
Speaker 1: to get hit with an AD Let me say, hold on,
Speaker 1: watch this.
Speaker 2: The night vision might have a little bit of there
Speaker 2: might be a little bit of a boosting effect but
Speaker 2: it wouldn't be much. But yeah, there's no way it
Speaker 2: could present clearer imaging unless it's a prescription, unless it's
Speaker 2: just by chance. You know, you could happen to have
Speaker 2: the right fucked up vision, But how could it present
Speaker 2: a better image than what your eyes produce? Right?
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, I agree.
Speaker 3: On watch, if you wear glasses driving a night, you
Speaker 3: can be down right dangerous and stressful. Difficulty seeing the
Speaker 3: glare of oncoming headlights. Well not any by the way,
Speaker 3: the voice sounds fake. This is one of like the
Speaker 3: shittiest infomercials I've ever seen. But I can't believe you've
Speaker 3: never seen this one before.
Speaker 2: No, I haven't had cable in years. Okay, good point.
Speaker 3: More introducing HD vision night vision.
Speaker 2: Okay, I might get these fit over your existing See
Speaker 2: that they put it up to the cameras at night.
Speaker 3: They cut the brighter. It enhanced contrast and clarity.
Speaker 2: You know, hoon over your whole fucking cranial socket ship.
Speaker 1: Who looks like more of a dickhead? In twenty twenty four,
Speaker 1: the guy driving by himself in a car with HD
Speaker 1: glasses on, or the guy wearing a mask by himself.
Speaker 2: The guy pounding the HD vision guy into the ground.
Speaker 1: I thought you were gonna say, the guy pounding his dick.
Speaker 2: There was his he's wearing a mask. Yeah.
Speaker 1: There was this NFL player, Kellen Winslow junior. His father, No,
Speaker 1: Kellen Winslow the third whatever. It was a lineage thing.
Speaker 1: His father was like a Hall of Fame sports football man.
Speaker 1: He just said that, like an adult man, a nice
Speaker 1: football man. And they and Kellen Winslow was a great
Speaker 1: player in his own right. And he got injured a
Speaker 1: couple times or whatever. And the last.
Speaker 2: Time, great Carl Winslow.
Speaker 1: He he and now he did, I believe, go to
Speaker 1: prison for raping old women.
Speaker 2: Okay, following in Richard Ramirez steps.
Speaker 1: Killing Winslow the second Okay, let's see. But the one
Speaker 1: big thing was, uh.
Speaker 2: Oh, he had a lot of crimes, it looks.
Speaker 1: Like, but there was one.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, but he's got CTE.
Speaker 1: There was one.
Speaker 2: He wasn't born a monster, he was made one.
Speaker 1: I don't know. Ah fuck, I don't know where it is.
Speaker 1: It's on here somewhere, but I remember they found him
Speaker 1: like passed out. They said he was smoking spice maybe
Speaker 1: if I remember correctly, passed out in like a Walmart
Speaker 1: parking lot, fucking beating his dick with a fucking thing
Speaker 1: of vasolene next to him.
Speaker 2: Oh shit, that was some good spice. That was the
Speaker 2: one twenty.
Speaker 1: G I uh one time Jenninly smoked salvia down the
Speaker 1: fucking beach trey.
Speaker 2: What concentration they that was in twenties? That came sixties?
Speaker 1: Okay, it had to have been forty. And here's why.
Speaker 2: Okay, because.
Speaker 1: My ass would have been like, let's go as high
Speaker 1: as we can get, you know.
Speaker 2: I did that. It was a fucking bad thing. So
Speaker 2: good thing you just went to And.
Speaker 1: Then my wallet, though, would have stopped me at the
Speaker 1: forty threshold, where I would have been, oh no, we'll
Speaker 1: just get this. That's fine.
Speaker 2: Oh man, if you're trying to do drugs on a budget,
Speaker 2: you should get into shrooms.
Speaker 1: Uh No, I'm happy with my current drug consumption. I'm solid.
Speaker 2: But you can grow shrooms in a little tupperware huh. Okay, cool,
Speaker 2: and you harvest them and you eat them and you
Speaker 2: get off fucking high.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we've had a little seven pound I don't want
Speaker 1: to get off track. So we're at the Cat, which
Speaker 1: is a two second story, and then we'll go back
Speaker 1: to the salvia, and from the salvia we go to
Speaker 1: Kent Wishington. Kent Wishington, the football player beat his dick. Okay,
Speaker 1: so we used to have our last cat was like
Speaker 1: a six pound girl cat, right, and she took like
Speaker 1: six pound girl shits. Okay. Now we have like a
Speaker 1: fifteen pound male eats a lot of wet food cat. Yo.
Speaker 1: It's the what cat shit is? Other worldly? Gross smell it.
Speaker 2: I never really see this.
Speaker 1: I thought I thought you were going to say, I
Speaker 1: don't ever really mind it. It's kind of pleasant, you know.
Speaker 2: I well, I don't smell it either. Really. Like. We
Speaker 2: bought the unscented litter accidentally a couple of days ago,
Speaker 2: and I did notice, like, oh, this litter box was
Speaker 2: like fucking cat piss you know. Yeah, this up boy, Yeah,
Speaker 2: and I got my son to do it, you know.
Speaker 2: But the the what is it? The perfume kind of
Speaker 2: kiddy litter. Yeah, the cat will shitting there and pissing
Speaker 2: there and just smells like perfume. Hmm.
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, it smells like catshit rolled in perfume in
Speaker 1: my house at least.
Speaker 2: Yeah, But I mean that's fine. It's long, it's got
Speaker 2: a coating of perfume.
Speaker 1: I can't tell, so jump back salvia story. We were
Speaker 1: on a third floor balcony down the beach. Right at
Speaker 1: that idea, the surf side.
Speaker 2: Motel sounds charming.
Speaker 1: It is the closest one to the boardwalk and the
Speaker 1: cheapest one, which tells you it's also the most dangerous.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it tells you, right. Most of the doors don't lock.
Speaker 1: They didn't. Yeah that was the story when we went
Speaker 1: one time and it was fucking like bolted back on
Speaker 1: the fucking lock. They didn't replace the door, They just
Speaker 1: kind of like put metal over the part where it
Speaker 1: had been ticked in.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's scary, man. I slept in a motel six
Speaker 2: in Vegas ones with my wife and we spent most
Speaker 2: of that night at a Hooter's and like a bar
Speaker 2: and stuff like say, you know, safely around it by
Speaker 2: hundreds and hundreds of people unless a sniper perched up
Speaker 2: in the balcony and started shooting everybody. Once the country
Speaker 2: band took stage, but the Yeah, we went back to
Speaker 2: that motel six, man, and I remember like not sleeping
Speaker 2: a fucking wink. I was just like staring at the
Speaker 2: I had the dead bolt on. But it was just
Speaker 2: like it was one of those ones where it's like
Speaker 2: a stick with the little hook that locks onto the stick,
Speaker 2: so they could still push your door open an inch
Speaker 2: break it off, and you know if they kick hard enough,
Speaker 2: and it's like, dude, I don't have a gun with
Speaker 2: me or anything. I had to get on a plane
Speaker 2: and I don't even own a gun. Yeah that was. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I feel for you, because New Jersey's worse than Vegas.
Speaker 1: To believe it or not, you don't have to feel
Speaker 1: for me. I felt no fear any of those times
Speaker 1: I went down there, none whatsoever. Now that you're saying it,
Speaker 1: it's really like sticking in my head. I was more
Speaker 1: fearful of like fucking bedbugs or someone else came. Well
Speaker 1: one time, did get sheets had they had blood on them?
Speaker 2: So, oh, well that might have just been period.
Speaker 1: It was near the head. Actually, that muld have been
Speaker 1: just a shotgun last Yeah, it.
Speaker 2: Could have been, but it's probably just period. Like the
Speaker 2: chick was sixty nine and on her period, you know.
Speaker 1: Oh, and it just dripped onto his face like alien.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, it's just like the ooze coming down out
Speaker 2: of the rafters. Yeah, I've seen a movie recently man
Speaker 2: where this chick I fucking forget where what it was.
Speaker 2: It was some like met some boy like at her
Speaker 2: high school, like after school for sex, and she she
Speaker 2: got him to eat her out while she's on her period,
Speaker 2: and like he he realizes like midway through because he
Speaker 2: you know, like she just kind of shoves his head
Speaker 2: under the covers and then he's like, oh, you fucking
Speaker 2: gross bitch, and he runs out with all this blood
Speaker 2: on his face, and I'm like, dude, just do it.
Speaker 1: I'm not a fan, I have I've done it. You
Speaker 1: ever do it by accident?
Speaker 2: Okay? When it's by accident, it's like, hey, did you
Speaker 2: know you'd sprung a leak? Yeah, i'd have liked a warning. Yeah.
Speaker 2: But if you're going in the know, then yeah, it's like,
Speaker 2: oh yeah, I I came ready for this. I didn't
Speaker 2: eat today.
Speaker 1: That's really gross. That's uh yeah, that's real gross.
Speaker 2: All right. So that was the salvia you got.
Speaker 1: And we smoked it, and we didn't have anything that
Speaker 1: we had been smoking, Like we weren't. We didn't smoke weed.
Speaker 1: It wasn't legalized. This was fucking ten years ago or something.
Speaker 2: You didn't have a frame of reference right right.
Speaker 1: Right right, and we had no buzz whatsoever, like felt nothing,
Speaker 1: felt like we you know here, smoke some oxygen, you know,
Speaker 1: and fucking I guess oxygen would have even gotten you
Speaker 1: a little bit higher. Not if you smoked it, you
Speaker 1: would explode yourself, right, yeah.
Speaker 2: I think you would.
Speaker 1: All right, uh uh? But we got nothing except just
Speaker 1: the giggles, like crazy giggles too, just no word like
Speaker 1: and you couldn't stop it. But I was a little
Speaker 1: worried I was going to do a header off of
Speaker 1: the balcony, like if I started seeing hallucinations or something.
Speaker 1: Did you see hallucinations when you did it?
Speaker 2: One hundred percent? Yes, apps fucking lutely. That was my
Speaker 2: first experience with any sort of psychedelic, and it was this.
Speaker 2: It deterred me from psychedelics for so long. I accidentally
Speaker 2: discovered that I could enjoy a psychedelic because I took no.
Speaker 2: I guess it wasn't accidental, No, because the guy I
Speaker 2: took this drug Mandy md A. It's MDM is Mollie, right.
Speaker 2: Mandy is a slightly different chemical and it's basically this
Speaker 2: euphoric drug that also gives you slight hallucinations like visual
Speaker 2: distortion type shit, and yeah, like I I met a
Speaker 2: dude who made it and he look up md A,
Speaker 2: uh the drug.
Speaker 1: Okay, all right, go ahead, and you keep talking about it.
Speaker 2: Yeah. The dude was like a chemistry student. He had
Speaker 2: made the stuff, and like I trusted him. I trusted
Speaker 2: the dude who took it. So yeah, I bought some.
Speaker 2: And yeah I realized, like, oh shit, hallucinating can be fun.
Speaker 2: Shrooms are cool and stuff. But yeah, salvia, it straight
Speaker 2: up made me see like I didn't live an alternate
Speaker 2: life or anything, but I definitely dissociated from like space
Speaker 2: and time. Yeah reality. I completely lost my like thread,
Speaker 2: you know. I like when I came back from my
Speaker 2: weird hallucination, I had no idea like what was going on.
Speaker 2: It took a while for everything to come back. I
Speaker 2: had to like have my memory job. It was very
Speaker 2: like disorienting. And then while you're hallucinating, I was seeing
Speaker 2: just like it looked like the matrix, you know, the
Speaker 2: like the text crawling down on the screen, the code.
Speaker 2: It was like that, and it seemed to last for
Speaker 2: a long time, and it was like three D and
Speaker 2: it like shot out of the the screen of the
Speaker 2: world at me and it enveloped me, and and I
Speaker 2: felt like when I had come to it was so
Speaker 2: I remember this part vividly. I remember feeling like I
Speaker 2: was like jettisoned awake. So I like my head was
Speaker 2: on a table and it it like what I kind
Speaker 2: of saw was like the portal closing in front of me,
Speaker 2: and that was the table, and it was like I
Speaker 2: felt like flung back from it. You know. Obviously it
Speaker 2: was just me like freaking out, but yeah, everybody was
Speaker 2: like laughing and stuff, and I got all I was
Speaker 2: all paranoid, and I was like I thought everybody was
Speaker 2: like trying to hurt me. It's weird because you see
Speaker 2: a thing come out of a person, you see like
Speaker 2: something like more like a more true to the animal
Speaker 2: side of the person. So I like freaked out in
Speaker 2: like I was kind of I wasn't violent, but I
Speaker 2: was very defensive. So like someone tried to put their
Speaker 2: arm on me or something, and I like pushed them
Speaker 2: off of me.
Speaker 1: Get the fuck off, Get the fuck off of me.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was like and I and
Speaker 2: I started accusing everybody. I was like, you're against me
Speaker 2: and you were in on it and you're trying to
Speaker 2: kill me. I it was just like from nowhere. It
Speaker 2: was just like this like primal thing, like oh my god,
Speaker 2: they're they're coming at me, you know. And then when
Speaker 2: my wife did it, because she after she saw me
Speaker 2: do it, like she thought it was a good idea. Yeah,
Speaker 2: she went into like fear state, you know. She was
Speaker 2: like in in like the corner, just like staring at
Speaker 2: them so long time.
Speaker 1: How many possible reactions are there to taking this truck? Okay?
Speaker 1: One is a positive happy, you know, good nice normal sitting.
Speaker 1: Maybe you see a little something, you feel something, you know,
Speaker 1: maybe you could enjoy some music you laugh.
Speaker 2: Laugh.
Speaker 1: The other one is corner no, no, no. The other one, yeah,
Speaker 1: I understand, is too more. But the other sorry, you're
Speaker 1: right whenever. The other one that I'm thinking of initially
Speaker 1: is fucking blair Witch.
Speaker 2: Is coming for you.
Speaker 1: Stand in the corner. Don't turn around because if you
Speaker 1: look at her, she fucking I don't know whatever the
Speaker 1: blair Witch did you there?
Speaker 2: You go, uh you want her to kill the other kid?
Speaker 1: Is that what it is?
Speaker 2: I think that's I think that's premise. It may be yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: I think I think that's like the rip. The legend
Speaker 2: is like, oh she would she would kill the first
Speaker 2: one that turned around or some shit. But it's like, dude,
Speaker 2: I thought this was real when I was a kid,
Speaker 2: and it's not. That's fucking bullshit. Somebody should do.
Speaker 1: I saw that too late in life. And by that
Speaker 1: I mean I don't know that I've seen it all
Speaker 1: the way through.
Speaker 2: But it's boring.
Speaker 1: For about I was just gonna say, I try and
Speaker 1: put it on now and look at him like, this
Speaker 1: looks like shit, this sucks.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's entire very good.
Speaker 1: Night vision glasses. Oh the third one, well, what about one?
Speaker 2: Is?
Speaker 1: The third one is?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Violent one? Yeah rage Kellen Winslow. On November fourth, twenty nineteen,
Speaker 1: wins Will plead it guilty to the rape of an
Speaker 1: unconscious teen and sexual battery on a fifty four year
Speaker 1: old hitchhiker as part of a plea deal.
Speaker 2: Did both of those primes happen in the same night, I.
Speaker 1: Don't know. But did you hear about Mariah Carey.
Speaker 2: Her mommy, sister, dad, huh.
Speaker 1: On the same day?
Speaker 2: How did that happen?
Speaker 1: I don't know. They haven't. Oh, man, if it comes
Speaker 1: out and that that's what they're burying like, oh, my god,
Speaker 1: she had died by gun violence, and the other one is, oh,
Speaker 1: she died by suicide. Well, who did the gun violence? Oh,
Speaker 1: her daughter shot her in the face and then killed herself.
Speaker 2: Two more black women taken by firearm.
Speaker 1: Did you see the picture? No?
Speaker 4: Okay, all right, okay, away.
Speaker 1: No, they're all fucking huh, where's the picture. Carrie's mother's
Speaker 1: the whitest lady I've ever seen.
Speaker 2: Okay, she looks like Pauladine.
Speaker 1: She has the ability, yes, she does to grant. Fucking
Speaker 1: My joke's not as funny after your polodine thing. Your
Speaker 1: polodine thing was better. It is better than the joke.
Speaker 2: Well, the audience can't see her.
Speaker 1: Sometimes you just tap out, you know, And I just
Speaker 1: I tapped out on that joke. Appreciate it. Yours better.
Speaker 1: She does look like fucking Palladine. You nailed it. But anyway,
Speaker 1: put it in a But that's her dead mother. Kellen
Speaker 1: Winslow know that rape did not occur on the same day.
Speaker 1: We're working backwards. This is tenant, O. Yeah, I know,
Speaker 1: this is tenant. It's kind of like inception too. Uh.
Speaker 2: It is because there's dreams.
Speaker 1: Is it probably just no dreams because it probably my
Speaker 1: lip is splitting in the middle.
Speaker 2: Assalted, they really bothering?
Speaker 1: Oh it hurts no well, Kellen Winslow. He accepted a
Speaker 1: fourteen year prison sentence for one count of rape.
Speaker 2: I didn't see the sexual part. I didn't realize the
Speaker 2: battery was on a fifty four year old hitchhiker or
Speaker 2: I I didn't realize that was sexual battery. I thought
Speaker 2: it was like he raped.
Speaker 1: An unconscious teen and sexually batteried. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, the team was the fifty four year old hitchhiker's daughter.
Speaker 2: The CTA CTE had taken over. He was living in
Speaker 2: the Walking Dead universe.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah, let me rape your teen daughter and
Speaker 1: he smashes the guy in the mount.
Speaker 2: I work.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so anyway, yeah, he's a rapist. Season in prison.
Speaker 1: H HD night vision glasses, let's finish this commercial. Wow,
Speaker 1: you really do see better.
Speaker 2: With regular eyeglasses, there's so much glare, and with the
Speaker 2: HD night vision there's no more glare. I love them.
Speaker 3: HD Vision night vision wraparounds are famous high definition lenses
Speaker 3: with a special night vision tint fits over your exist off.
Speaker 3: It makes it way easier to see at night. They
Speaker 3: work great in rainy conditions and really cut the glare
Speaker 3: if you're driving in snow, don't be afraid to drive
Speaker 3: you want to.
Speaker 1: Look like the lead singer of the Offspring.
Speaker 2: I think glare is completely dependent on and not completely Sorry,
Speaker 2: it's gonna be dependent on the environment. But glare is
Speaker 2: gonna be influenced by you, just like your body, size, shape,
Speaker 2: your eyes, your sensitivity, all that stuff. I hate when
Speaker 2: shit promises to reduce glare because it never fucking does.
Speaker 5: Ye.
Speaker 1: I don't even I'm not disagreeing with you. I don't
Speaker 1: even know how to start. I don't even understand the
Speaker 1: science behind it or anything to even comment on whether
Speaker 1: or not you said something smart or terribly ignorant or
Speaker 1: I don't.
Speaker 2: How do you ever buy sunglasses that?
Speaker 1: I have never once thought of glare though I've never
Speaker 1: once like thought of blair in that.
Speaker 2: Maybe I do.
Speaker 1: I have nice sunglasses I have, I got wayfarers.
Speaker 2: Maybe it's for colorized lasses. Maybe tell me, because yeah,
Speaker 2: like the glare, I mean, sunglasses reduce it to some degree.
Speaker 2: But like I remember buying these super fucking expensive sunglasses
Speaker 2: one hundred and eighty bucks at the time for oak Lea's,
Speaker 2: which is a lot at the time. It's not a
Speaker 2: lot for sunglasses now, but for a pair of nice
Speaker 2: sunglasses then that was that was approaching top level. You know,
Speaker 2: you're getting there. Yeah, but they had like polarized lenses.
Speaker 2: They were extremely scratch resistant. I could drop them, I
Speaker 2: stepped on them and they would just pop out of
Speaker 2: the little visor. Sure fry thing. Yeah frame. Yeah. They
Speaker 2: then like they wouldn't snap. They were like they were
Speaker 2: fucking great glasses. And the polarization was real. It's like
Speaker 2: you can look at the little card and it's like, oh,
Speaker 2: that's interesting. When was that gonna help you notice it?
Speaker 2: Like with things like windshields and windows and and water,
Speaker 2: you're you're, you're, it's much clearer. You're able to get
Speaker 2: a better view through translucent uh substrates, you know. But
Speaker 2: the one thing it couldn't do was get rid of
Speaker 2: the fucking glare, dude. And in Iraq, glare is it's
Speaker 2: just effervescent. It's just fucking everywhere. Everything is fucking sand.
Speaker 2: All the buildings are white or light tan. Everything is
Speaker 2: just bouncing light everywhere. Dude. There's no clouds, there's no trees,
Speaker 2: and every structure is the like the perfect dimension and
Speaker 2: color to bounce sunlight right back at you. It's impossible
Speaker 2: to get rid of the glare over there.
Speaker 1: Uh yeah, I've never thought about glare in that way.
Speaker 1: I think of not Halo's. But I get the I
Speaker 1: get what they're describing here. When I'm driving every the
Speaker 1: light looks like a star burst.
Speaker 2: Sure, I get that too. Because I have poor color vision.
Speaker 2: I have good vision at night. I learned a lot
Speaker 2: about eyes recently. I have good vision at night, poor
Speaker 2: vision in the day, and it has to do with
Speaker 2: my sensitivity to light. Right. So, once my eyes adjusted
Speaker 2: to the dark, I actually see really really well. But
Speaker 2: as soon as I get the like a blast of
Speaker 2: light in the eyes, yeah, it's like disorienting. I see
Speaker 2: the halos. I know exactly what you're talking about. I
Speaker 2: bet you have good night vision too.
Speaker 1: Huh. It's getting worse. It's definitely getting worse, yeah, but
Speaker 1: probably better.
Speaker 2: You know what.
Speaker 1: I have light eyes too. There was a baseball player
Speaker 1: and he was Jock. We both have Josh Hamilton right
Speaker 1: First overall, Pick became an alcoholic drug addict. Pulled himself
Speaker 1: out of that. He was out of baseball, pulled himself
Speaker 1: out of that and worked his way up to the
Speaker 1: major league level. He was a Christian guy, right, but
Speaker 1: still good for him.
Speaker 2: For not born again or not.
Speaker 1: Just like I don't even know. I just and I
Speaker 1: know he wasn't like a dickhead about it. He just
Speaker 1: fucking he was like this Christ helped me, so I
Speaker 1: wasn't shooting fucking dope in a gutter. And I go,
Speaker 1: you know what, even if Mohammed gets you there, I
Speaker 1: want that for you better than that. Now, are you
Speaker 1: going to strap up a vest and head into a Walmart?
Speaker 1: I don't know, but whatever, there you go by the
Speaker 1: way we started on the Walmart near your house. I
Speaker 1: don't know, Yeah, get back there. So Josh Hamilton wins
Speaker 1: the American League MVP one year, coming from again the
Speaker 1: highest tut it prospect is the number one overall pick
Speaker 1: that one year to a fucking total loser to finding
Speaker 1: a wife, finding God, finding sobriety. They went onto the
Speaker 1: World Series that year, and uh, this was kind of nice.
Speaker 1: You know how they spray champagne on everybody when you
Speaker 1: head to it when you win a series and go
Speaker 1: on to the next one.
Speaker 2: They all did their sober guys there.
Speaker 1: They all did ginger rail. Oh god, he's a drunk loser. Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2: You know, they went home and fucking did lines of
Speaker 2: coke off strippers asses and made fun of him.
Speaker 1: Well, had Josh Hamilton died on some kind of plane
Speaker 1: accident or whatever, broke his neck in a fucking yoga
Speaker 1: position and died, his story would have ended sweet there. Okay,
Speaker 1: Josh Hamilton admitted to after having slumps at the plate,
Speaker 1: which will actually bring it full circle to what we
Speaker 1: were saying. Uh, he started drinking again, and then he
Speaker 1: got seen on camera or something like that doing lines
Speaker 1: of coke. Then he fell out of baseball. Then his
Speaker 1: wife left him and took the kids. After all that,
Speaker 1: and he became a total, full on loser. I don't
Speaker 1: know if he's broke, but he had a contract for
Speaker 1: about one hundred and twenty five million dollars guaranteed, fully
Speaker 1: guaranteed that all got paid out, and.
Speaker 2: Uh oh, what did he do with it?
Speaker 1: I don't I don't know. That's I hope he's not broke.
Speaker 1: I hope he's just a loser. I hope he's not broke.
Speaker 2: Oh dude, I hope he's broke, because then it could
Speaker 2: be a comeback story job, right.
Speaker 1: Josh Hamilton has beautiful light blue eyes. And in sports
Speaker 1: they have what are called split stats. So split stats
Speaker 1: are your day games versus your night games. His day
Speaker 1: game stats were total shit, and his night game were
Speaker 1: better than MVP numbers.
Speaker 2: Well, and you know that makes total sense because the
Speaker 2: thing I was telling you about eyes correlates with color.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, so cool.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah yeah, it's so cool. So so I should
Speaker 2: be a baseball guy.
Speaker 1: Huh, yeah you should. Yeah. I don't know. Can you
Speaker 1: do cocaine and drink ginger ale?
Speaker 2: I mean I could, yeah, yeah, as long as it's
Speaker 2: not alcohol.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't we even have to play baseball to
Speaker 1: do that.
Speaker 2: I would want to show up and like sit on
Speaker 2: the dugout.
Speaker 1: Okay, that's fair fit. Maybe you could. You could bring
Speaker 1: them some of these HD glasses and it's the fucking
Speaker 1: glare is what's gonna get you. Guys. Let me let
Speaker 1: me tell you you were talking about that in a
Speaker 1: way that nobody on this side of the ocean can
Speaker 1: can necessarily understand what you're talking about. That's like if
Speaker 1: you saw a spider at a thing and you were like, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's a you think that's a big one. There's desert
Speaker 1: spiders that are really and people just go, Okay, I
Speaker 1: don't know what that means.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, And I saw desert spiders and they're not
Speaker 2: as scary as you would think, you know.
Speaker 1: Really, okay are they? Are they as big as they look?
Speaker 2: Though? No, those pictures are really deceptive.
Speaker 1: Okay.
Speaker 2: They the biggest ones I saw were like a size
Speaker 2: of like a prescription bottle.
Speaker 1: Oh, that's still really gross and scary, but it's not
Speaker 1: a small dog.
Speaker 2: Right, yeah. Like I've never seen any a rack kneid
Speaker 2: bigger than like a tarantula in real life, and I'm
Speaker 2: skeptical that many exist. But anyway, yeah, like the that
Speaker 2: is like a an otherworldly thing, like that's that's what
Speaker 2: that was. So what's so kind of like uh, I
Speaker 2: don't know, not not interesting, it's not the right world word.
Speaker 2: It's just like eye opening, you know. It's like I
Speaker 2: I forever was changed by that. Like I spent a
Speaker 2: lot of money on sunglasses to this day because I'm
Speaker 2: just always afraid. Like, yeah, I think I even told
Speaker 2: this story on the podcast. One day I went to
Speaker 2: the shower tent or the shower trailer when the sun
Speaker 2: was still down, took a shower and came out and
Speaker 2: the sun had come up, and I didn't have my
Speaker 2: sunglasses and I was literally fucking blind. Really. I was
Speaker 2: like walking back to my tent just like with one
Speaker 2: hand out in front of me, just trying so hard
Speaker 2: desperately to get my eyes open, and they just wouldn't
Speaker 2: because the sun was just like burning my fucking corne.
Speaker 2: It's fucked up.
Speaker 1: You know what you should have had with you.
Speaker 2: Uh, HD vision pro glasses.
Speaker 3: Famous high definition lenses with a special night vision tint
Speaker 3: the daytime eye glasses. It makes it way easier to
Speaker 3: see the conditions and really cut the glare. If you're
Speaker 3: driving in snow, don't be afraid to drive at night.
Speaker 3: Now you could have Hi, I could.
Speaker 1: Have swore there was one of these later on. That's
Speaker 1: why I skimmed it while you were talking to see
Speaker 1: if it was this one. It wasn't. Uh there, I
Speaker 1: could have swore there was a military guy who was like,
Speaker 1: you know over in the Middle East. He's glasses really
Speaker 1: helped me out. I was I don't think it's this
Speaker 1: one though.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Well, you know, whatever gets you through. Bob some
Speaker 2: guy's got beef jerky, somebody's got nude pictures from their gal.
Speaker 2: You got your h D vision pro?
Speaker 1: Well, how expensive are that? I mean I would pay
Speaker 1: one to two hundred thousand dollars to have a better
Speaker 1: vision at night.
Speaker 2: I mean.
Speaker 1: It's past that. It's price price, Yeah, to be able
Speaker 1: to see at night? What am I an owl?
Speaker 2: Wait? What are you a fucking lion?
Speaker 1: I don't know, I don't is that?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Cats have good vision.
Speaker 2: Right, I think they hunt at night, don't they.
Speaker 1: My cat has one eye, so I don't really know.
Speaker 5: Oh, dude, you should test it.
Speaker 2: You should like put a mouse on the left side
Speaker 2: and no, dude, he doesn't have the right side.
Speaker 1: He doesn't have a good eye and a bad eye.
Speaker 1: He has a good eye and no eye.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I know, you put you put that mouse outside.
Speaker 1: What don't they just like when somebody goes I'm blindfolded
Speaker 1: and you go like this, huh and you throw your
Speaker 1: fists at it. Why don't I just do that towards
Speaker 1: my fucking cat?
Speaker 2: Because you want to make it scientific.
Speaker 1: All right, you need a control.
Speaker 2: You gotta se Yeah, yeah, I don't know. I don't
Speaker 2: know what it's gonna be, but just get one.
Speaker 1: Okay, all right, hold on, here's a black dude. He's
Speaker 1: gonna be like, that's a mind.
Speaker 2: Man, I can't see ship.
Speaker 1: I can see shit. That is my favorite line from Faceballs.
Speaker 2: Look you paused it on Bronson pin Shot. Here be
Speaker 2: barreling next to this guy with his vision pros. Hey, hey, Bud,
Speaker 2: I can see just fine over here.
Speaker 1: See. I was picturing him as fucking David Berkowitz. Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: I thought he was trying to pull out a fucking
Speaker 1: forty four and point it.
Speaker 2: You know, actually I think that might be Uh, who's
Speaker 2: the guy? Uh who jumped out of the plane?
Speaker 1: Oh, dB Cooper, Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's Yeah.
Speaker 2: Where they get this guy for this?
Speaker 1: I don't know, man, I can't believe.
Speaker 2: Is that a hat or his hair?
Speaker 1: I can't believe you've never seen this that's his hair?
Speaker 2: Is that one of those Russian police hats from Raw Deal?
Speaker 1: I think it's more one of those curly, you know,
Speaker 1: jew hairs. Yeah, that's it. You said it nicer than
Speaker 1: I was gonna say. Witness they were amish.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Witness. I never seen that movie, but I know
Speaker 2: it's like he's got to protect an amish kid or something.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Amish kids saw a murder and he's got to
Speaker 1: get him to like the fucking prosecutor or something. But
Speaker 1: they they got but they ain't got no car.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so he's got to drive them. Yeah. I feel
Speaker 2: like in an Amish community community, they would just solve it,
Speaker 2: you know, like take the boy's eyes.
Speaker 1: They see the murder, and the kid tells someone, and
Speaker 1: the gangster guys like, what are you gonna do about it?
Speaker 1: And they just start as in them in the head.
Speaker 1: The Amish just a little start killing the goombas fucking
Speaker 1: grease balls.
Speaker 2: I don't remove the boy's tongue so that he does
Speaker 2: not tell them.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they still have to quiet the boy, all right,
Speaker 1: all right, hold on.
Speaker 2: Let's break his fingers so he cannot write.
Speaker 3: Yeah, definition night vision wraparounds take control of your life.
Speaker 2: From what the fuck out of commercial who casted this ship?
Speaker 2: There was an old woman. She looked like the old
Speaker 2: lady from the Hereditary. They got fucking D. B. Cooper
Speaker 2: in a Moscow fucking top hat, and now they've got
Speaker 2: someone who's obviously from what our president would call her
Speaker 2: shit whole country.
Speaker 1: One of the presidents, Yeah, one of them more public.
Speaker 1: Probably both.
Speaker 2: Yeah, President, there's still one more.
Speaker 1: Public than the other, I would assume, though, sure.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, one one behind the scenes.
Speaker 1: Let's be honest. There's nobody in fucking the House of
Speaker 1: Representatives or up that doesn't think some places in the
Speaker 1: world are shithole countries.
Speaker 2: Oh dude, it's just an It's an objective fact. I mean,
Speaker 2: if you live in a nice place, by definition, there
Speaker 2: has to be not nice places, and a synonym of
Speaker 2: not nice places shithole.
Speaker 4: It's all right, let's watch this guy makes it so
Speaker 4: much easier to look through kids windows With my night
Speaker 4: vision glasses.
Speaker 2: I always know when the neighborhood watches out and I
Speaker 2: can get out before anyone sees my pud.
Speaker 1: I like to watch your daughter change, but it's so
Speaker 1: dark in your house. Yeah, you should get some all right,
Speaker 1: all right, let's say key night vision glasses. I'm not scared.
Speaker 2: I can see in front of me everything. They're fantastic.
Speaker 1: See that is what it looks like when I'm fucking driving.
Speaker 1: I might benefit from these glasses.
Speaker 2: I'll say this. I see that with headlights, but I
Speaker 2: definitely do not get that same effect from tail lights.
Speaker 2: Weak dim lights like traffic or what are they street lights?
Speaker 2: Traffic lights? Yeah, I don't this is an exaggeration. This
Speaker 2: product is they're curing a They're selling you a disease
Speaker 2: and the cure and the same thing.
Speaker 1: I'm telling you. It looks like this when I see it. Now,
Speaker 1: I won't have you pussing. I won't have you pussing misinformation.
Speaker 1: I just said that I should fucking get them. They
Speaker 1: look kind of cool.
Speaker 2: Yeah we should. I've actually been thinking that would be
Speaker 2: a cool segment for our s, like because like, I
Speaker 2: watched this guy on the internet. He's a younger I
Speaker 2: want to say kid, but he's probably like thirty years
Speaker 2: old by now. But I've been watching him since he
Speaker 2: was basically a kid. He makes YouTube videos. I watched
Speaker 2: his stuff with my son, Drew Gooden, not the fucking
Speaker 2: basketball player.
Speaker 1: Well, what's hero with Drew good in the basketball play?
Speaker 2: And then I just don't watch his YouTube channel. Okay,
Speaker 2: I'm just trying to delineate here.
Speaker 1: No, it's the other one, not the basketball player.
Speaker 2: It's the little boy, the other little boy.
Speaker 1: It's the little boy, not the seven foot two man.
Speaker 2: Well, he is kind of a little boy, I mean
Speaker 2: compared to some of those other big burly men.
Speaker 1: Who are you talking about Drew Gooden?
Speaker 2: Bro, Yeah, Drew good In is black.
Speaker 1: Huh yeah, yeah yeah, I thought he I know, he
Speaker 1: doesn't sound like it. No, no, no, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: Drew good And I spelled his name with a fucking
Speaker 1: somehow I did a copyright ar out or registered that.
Speaker 2: I've been trying to make that in my text messages
Speaker 2: for like six years.
Speaker 1: Dud dude, there's not even the button on my board
Speaker 1: that does that.
Speaker 2: Oh you know, Drew Gooden the basketball player looks a
Speaker 2: lot like Joe Buden the rat.
Speaker 1: Kind of does, except again significantly taller, six and fifty pounds.
Speaker 2: Six ten god damn, but still not seven like some
Speaker 2: of those big.
Speaker 1: Yao Ming You ever see yao?
Speaker 2: Ming? Yeah?
Speaker 1: You ever see Yao?
Speaker 2: Ming?
Speaker 1: Shaq and Kevin Hart standing together?
Speaker 2: I did? You showed it to me and Kevin Hart
Speaker 2: was a little baby.
Speaker 1: It was a little baby.
Speaker 2: Yeah. This is the future of humanity, folks. This is
Speaker 2: what you asked for.
Speaker 1: Un did it?
Speaker 2: Now?
Speaker 1: Did they breathe? I think this story was and Mitch, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I was red honestly, yeah, I think it didn't. They
Speaker 1: get together the two tallest people in China.
Speaker 2: I think it might that.
Speaker 1: I think it was ritt. I don't know for sure.
Speaker 2: I okay, so what I've heard, and I don't want
Speaker 2: to say it's a conspiracy because I think I even
Speaker 2: read it like in a in a real source. I
Speaker 2: think his family was part of like a selective breeding program.
Speaker 2: They got like the most athletic, smartest, tallest, the best
Speaker 2: of everything they could find in one cat, in all
Speaker 2: those category worries, and they had him fuck each other.
Speaker 1: So Yao Ming was He's the only child of seven
Speaker 1: or six foot seven Yao Xunion and six foot three
Speaker 1: Fang Fang both.
Speaker 2: Of that is a big ass bitch right there.
Speaker 1: Che That is real big god damn for a Chinese girl.
Speaker 2: Yeah, we'll see.
Speaker 1: Is there a picture of Oh my god, oh my god.
Speaker 1: His career was cut very very short because this is Chinese. Uh,
Speaker 1: he was injured because he had to play for their
Speaker 1: national team so much. They they they owe him, like
Speaker 1: they really owned.
Speaker 2: Yeah, why didn't he just run away?
Speaker 1: Yeah? When did he just hide out? The seven foot
Speaker 1: five Chinese guy?
Speaker 2: Well, what are they gonna do? Send a fucking little
Speaker 2: karate guy over there?
Speaker 1: He's ye me, I know wait was his mother, both
Speaker 1: of whom were former professional basketball players.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so so maybe they just met at a basketball.
Speaker 1: No, this is like like a Batman villain or like
Speaker 1: an Avengers villain that kind of like like, oh, you
Speaker 1: know who, he's Ivan Drago. Oh yeah, the Russian from
Speaker 1: Yack like created to you know, just be this killing machine.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I mean a lot of folks have done that.
Speaker 2: I think Elon Musk has even said that he's like
Speaker 2: purposely because he thinks that this is I personally me,
Speaker 2: I'm gonna say this is his ego talking. But I'm
Speaker 2: pretty sure the words he used were something like he's
Speaker 2: trying to leave like a race of super geniuses, and
Speaker 2: that's why he's having like so many children in all
Speaker 2: these different parts of the world. I could be wrong
Speaker 2: about the terminology, but in spirit, that's what he's doing.
Speaker 2: He's nutting and as many women as he can so
Speaker 2: he can. You know, let the geniuses populate the planet.
Speaker 2: They won't be attractive or tall or anything, or physically intimidating,
Speaker 2: or be able to speak very well or not autistic,
Speaker 2: but they'll be geniuses.
Speaker 1: To be fair, he's a pretty smart guy.
Speaker 2: I think he seems like an above average intelligence. Absolutely, yeah,
Speaker 2: three different. I don't know that he would qualify as
Speaker 2: a I mean maybe his intellect is that of a genius,
Speaker 2: But I think his fucking weird personality, I mean it
Speaker 2: just takes him down a peg because of the shit
Speaker 2: he gets involved with, you know, like the arguments he
Speaker 2: takes up and the sides he's willing to take. It's like,
Speaker 2: he seems like he's smart enough to not get into
Speaker 2: that shit, you know, and that's what kind of brings
Speaker 2: him down for me. But he's obviously a very, very
Speaker 2: very smart person.
Speaker 1: Yes, yes, he has some level of intelligence, whatever that
Speaker 1: that is, whether it's managing or whatever. Yeah, I don't.
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 1: I don't know that it's a Look, hey, as long
Speaker 1: as he can fucking pay for him, I don't know
Speaker 1: that it's such a bad thing.
Speaker 2: Well, not that one he thinks is dead. He's not
Speaker 2: gonna pay for that one.
Speaker 1: Is there one he thinks is dead? Oh it's dead
Speaker 1: to him? The trans kid?
Speaker 2: Right, Yeah, well, yeah, he thinks it's dead.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Did he say or did he say my son
Speaker 1: is dead to me? What was the quote?
Speaker 2: Yeah, he said my son is dead. He was killed
Speaker 2: by the trans mind virus.
Speaker 1: I think it was probably the woke mind virus.
Speaker 2: Oh, maybe it was the woke mind virus. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Oof, that is so cringey. Ooh. I saw Tulci Gabbard
Speaker 1: just talk at a thing for Trump. I everyone loved her,
Speaker 1: you know, and it's changed.
Speaker 2: I just wanted to fuck her.
Speaker 1: I liked her. I still like her. I just want
Speaker 1: to But she spoke out a thing, and Robert F.
Speaker 1: Kenning Junior tweeted out, wonder Woman just joined the job
Speaker 1: Justice League.
Speaker 2: Well, I don't know what that.
Speaker 1: He's referring to him and Trump and her as the
Speaker 1: Justice League.
Speaker 2: Like, okay, so, which one is? Trump's obviously Superman, She's
Speaker 2: wonder Woman. Which one is? Fucking So Robert Kennedy's the flash.
Speaker 2: I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't Trump Superman, Trump's Batman.
Speaker 2: Okay, I'll yeah, I'll allow. So fucking Robert Kennedy is
Speaker 2: gonna be Superman.
Speaker 1: Robert Kennedy is like Aquaman screaming at chorals stuff vaccinating
Speaker 1: its kids.
Speaker 2: Dude, Robert Kennedy is like fucking Blue Beatles step brother.
Speaker 2: In the opening scene.
Speaker 1: He's fucking George Lopez.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, By the way, that movie was not that bad.
Speaker 2: I shut it off after Really, I didn't hate it.
Speaker 2: I don't hate it. It was all right, and I
Speaker 2: and I have a soft spot for d C. I
Speaker 2: prefer the DC characters and everything. I played the games
Speaker 2: more and everything, But fuck man, I couldn't do that movie.
Speaker 1: Who the two? All right? So the two are the
Speaker 1: two best villain groups, because if I'm honest, most villain
Speaker 1: groups fucking suck ship except for.
Speaker 2: Except for Man and Batman. Three.
Speaker 1: Actually, then I'll say, because no, no, no, no, oh no,
Speaker 1: no no, what are you telling You're saying those are
Speaker 1: good ones?
Speaker 2: I'm saying those are good Rogues Galleries?
Speaker 1: Yeah, who's the flash half? He has a gorilla and
Speaker 1: a guy who goes like Gorilla Grod is cool, yeah,
Speaker 1: glow or something. Gorilla Grod is essentially beast from the
Speaker 1: Marvel universe. Yeah, he's an intelligenty right, Yeah, okay, okay,
Speaker 1: Well that's there's only one good DC one, and there's
Speaker 1: one good Marvel and it's not.
Speaker 2: Then you're gonna say Batman.
Speaker 1: It's very obviously Batman.
Speaker 2: Yes, it's the best one. I like the best, though,
Speaker 2: I think Superman's got cool ass villains. Brainiac is coolest
Speaker 2: shit you know is coolest ship, dark Side, cool as
Speaker 2: shit Patreon.
Speaker 1: We'll do that. We'll go through like the best comic
Speaker 1: villains or some bullshit like that.
Speaker 2: I love that. Yeah, I'm a fucking nerd.
Speaker 1: Out and I'll tell you what the good and semi
Speaker 1: good marvel ones are. I mean, people are ready now,
Speaker 1: but whatever.
Speaker 2: I don't really know other than the X Men, I
Speaker 2: don't really know a lot of mar villains.
Speaker 1: We'll talk about it, so, yeah, we'll talk fucking night
Speaker 1: vision glasses. I think we did all.
Speaker 2: Of that right, fixed our eyes, Yeah, we fixed?
Speaker 1: Okay, we better so I go to the Walman kind.
Speaker 1: It does. By the way, we started with a reference
Speaker 1: to the Kevin Spacey story, which we'll No, we won't,
Speaker 1: I mean maybe we will.
Speaker 2: But what is is Kevin Spacey's homeless fucking cry for me?
Speaker 2: I can go folks. Oh wait, wait, alleged, no rescinded.
Speaker 1: There you go. My name's on everything. I'll just get
Speaker 1: sued for it.
Speaker 2: Well no, because he I don't think of people. All
Speaker 2: the people took their stories back, but I.
Speaker 1: Think some people killed themselves.
Speaker 2: Or some died, or some some took their stories back,
Speaker 2: and some space he was found innocent of or the
Speaker 2: cases were dismissed, So.
Speaker 1: Maybe I think it's fine for him to come back.
Speaker 2: I yeah, if I feel like if I watched the
Speaker 2: interview with him on Lex Friedman, and I feel like
Speaker 2: Lex is a really softball fucking interviewer, I hate watching him.
Speaker 2: I could stand.
Speaker 1: I don't know how you ever could. I have always
Speaker 1: found him boring. I mean, like Peterson on him would
Speaker 1: be what it would play in my hell.
Speaker 2: I think I don't. I don't mind if someone's boring.
Speaker 2: But he's a combination of boring, obnoxiously like humble and
Speaker 2: worldly in a way that seems like insincere, and also
Speaker 2: a terrible interviewer. He does not ask hard questions, and
Speaker 2: when he does try to ask hard questions, he he
Speaker 2: does a lot of what Rogan does, where he just
Speaker 2: will accept answers that sound good to him. And I've
Speaker 2: i I I kind of think of Lex as like
Speaker 2: he's like your he's your your Laurence Fishburn and the
Speaker 2: matrix red pillar, blue pill? Which one are you gonna take?
Speaker 2: Because he'll entertain both sides, But I I feel like
Speaker 2: he is Ah is just like, yeah, like a hollow,
Speaker 2: empty shell with no beliefs or values or principles. He's
Speaker 2: just like a boring lump. I hate him, But what
Speaker 2: was I saying about him? Who did you mention in that.
Speaker 1: I know I'm not being shitty. I saw I'm not
Speaker 1: being shitty. It was, uh, you saw someone on lex
Speaker 1: It wasn't Elon though, I don't think it's Kevin Spacey.
Speaker 1: Kevin Spacey.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, hell yeah, it was Kevin Spacey, right, And
Speaker 2: he just took Spacey's word for a lot of the stuff.
Speaker 2: So Spacey's there like, oh, well, the suit was dismissed
Speaker 2: on this one, and then this guy he said this thing,
Speaker 2: and that one he didn't show up, and this one
Speaker 2: I was found innocent, and none of my accusers were minors.
Speaker 2: So that's a big it, right, So right off the bat,
Speaker 2: Right off the bat, you're because that one kid is fifteen.
Speaker 2: I thought, yeah, he took back his story. He's the
Speaker 2: one who recanted. I think or that was the one
Speaker 2: where the judge threw it out and it was found
Speaker 2: innocent according to this interview. Yeah right, so according to Spacey,
Speaker 2: I remember him making the point like, look, so I
Speaker 2: was found innocent, Like my hands are clean of that one.
Speaker 2: I didn't do anything, and all my other accusers are adults,
Speaker 2: you know, so aren't I just kind of like, you know,
Speaker 2: a handsy guy that makes you feel uncomfortable. And if
Speaker 2: that's the truth, like let him come back.
Speaker 1: Can I say something that just is gonna make me
Speaker 1: so sound so fucking misogynistic? Sure, the fact that it
Speaker 1: wasn't on women actually lessens.
Speaker 2: It for me for me too, Okay, Okay, you fucking
Speaker 2: kidding man. We're white nights man. We don't want girls
Speaker 2: getting touched and raped and stuff and made to feel uncomfortable.
Speaker 2: We'll take that brunt.
Speaker 1: Yeah, really, yeah, it's it makes it, Yeah, as long
Speaker 1: as you kind of cause then like, look, Kevin Spacey
Speaker 1: isn't brock lessener, He's not overpowering anyone. If you say,
Speaker 1: like he enticed you with his money, a part of
Speaker 1: me is like did he drug you?
Speaker 2: Right?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 2: I mean and being enticed by money, like you're just
Speaker 2: biologically programmed to respond to money, Like I mean, you
Speaker 2: could be aware of that fact and and try and
Speaker 2: plan for it. But I mean, if you get enticed
Speaker 2: by money, you're just.
Speaker 1: A born ho you know, you born? No, what's so
Speaker 1: anyway Kevin's basey is losing. The sixty five year old
Speaker 1: actor wants to stay in the nine thousand square foot home,
Speaker 1: which he bought in twenty seventeen for five point sixty
Speaker 1: five million, for an extra six months, supposedly without paying anything.
Speaker 1: According to the new owner Sam However, oh what the
Speaker 1: fuck the commercial?
Speaker 2: Oh?
Speaker 1: Sorry?
Speaker 2: Thousand square foot? What city is this fucking house in?
Speaker 1: Uh? Potomac? Oh in?
Speaker 2: What is it?
Speaker 1: Maryland? Right?
Speaker 2: Oh? Okay, okay?
Speaker 1: In Baltimore? A lavish Baltimore condoc Jesus God, I'd get dance, yeah,
Speaker 1: but Baltimore, I'd get the fuck out of there. How
Speaker 1: do you shuttle your way in and out?
Speaker 2: Well, he probably lives in this nine thousand square foot compound. Dude,
Speaker 2: nine thousand square feet is literally it's it's just shy
Speaker 2: of six of my house. That's absurd. What does he have?
Speaker 2: Just a lot of guitars?
Speaker 1: How the fucking boys? No, no boys, none, no boys, grown.
Speaker 2: Men, yeah, just grown ass men and his guitars.
Speaker 1: So yeah, I see. Here is the one thing when
Speaker 1: I see stories like this, like I'm not supposed to
Speaker 1: feel bad for him, right right?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Like I can laugh at him. Were kicking them
Speaker 2: while he's down. All right, here's what.
Speaker 1: I could Yeah, here's what I would say. I could
Speaker 1: feel bad that he lost his career or if the
Speaker 1: other stuff, if it was all bullshit. Yeah, I could
Speaker 1: feel terrible that he lost his career. He was a
Speaker 1: phenomenal actor. He's still great actor. Blah blah blah. But like,
Speaker 1: you could have sold your five point six million dollar
Speaker 1: mansion and probably bought a nice two million dollars one
Speaker 1: and you'd still be pretty good.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, you probably could. Just he still gets royalty
Speaker 2: checks for a bunch of shit. Man, he could probably
Speaker 2: just take some money that he will have in a
Speaker 2: couple days and go get a really nice condo, you know,
Speaker 2: easily with you know his name and his credit score.
Speaker 1: And stuff, and live like a human being.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and walk to the bodega.
Speaker 1: Yeah in Baltimore. Man, maybe that's his thing. Hets to
Speaker 1: stay in Baltimore for some reason. Yeah, and he can't downgrade.
Speaker 1: If you go less than five and a half million
Speaker 1: for a home in Baltimore, you might be a roommate
Speaker 1: with some guy cooking crack.
Speaker 2: Yeah, if you don't have nine thousand square feet of
Speaker 2: home to protect yourself you might get shot by the
Speaker 2: police at anymore. Yeah.
Speaker 1: So I don't feel bad for Kevin Spacey.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I don't really feel bad for him either, except
Speaker 2: for that one part about how he was sixty five
Speaker 2: years old. Now he's gonna die soon.
Speaker 1: I don't know about that. I don't know that he's
Speaker 1: necessarily going to die soon, but.
Speaker 2: He Oh man, you think he's gonna lift to be
Speaker 2: ninety in this sad, sorry state? Or you think he's
Speaker 2: gonna make a comeback?
Speaker 1: No? I didn't. Why did you say it like it
Speaker 1: was fucking access Hollywood?
Speaker 2: Do you think?
Speaker 1: Do you think Kevin Spacey's gonna make a big comeback?
Speaker 2: No? I was saying it like mockingly, like this dude's
Speaker 2: fucking finished.
Speaker 1: Like well, I wasn't saying it seriously. I wasn't doing
Speaker 1: that voice like oh shit, I gotta keep working on that,
Speaker 1: make it real good.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's uh what's her name? Uh fucking holder? What's
Speaker 2: her name? Chelsea Handler? He's Chelsea Handler? Ten years ago?
Speaker 1: Okay, finish finished? Uh the Walmart near your house?
Speaker 2: Oh, what's going on? And someone got raped?
Speaker 1: Uh? No, so I went in there. We got those
Speaker 1: you know, those water jugs like the fucking I have
Speaker 1: a water dispenser like you have at a fucking office.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, cool.
Speaker 1: It is cool. It's pretty cool because you can go
Speaker 1: over and just hit some cold water, delicious hot water.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, why yeah, yeah, I got some warm water.
Speaker 1: So again, I got three of those jugs, right, and
Speaker 1: I bring them in there. Not Walmart is like, fucking
Speaker 1: it looks like a it's like a West African market,
Speaker 1: is what. It seems like. There's a roaming cattle, there's
Speaker 1: a lot of dashiki's and here's the thing. Okay, And
Speaker 1: then I want this to go into a broader discussion
Speaker 1: about immigration. Hispanic immigrants around here are really really nice.
Speaker 1: They're nice. The African ones are not. They I'm like, yeah,
Speaker 1: go ahead.
Speaker 2: That's a shame because the African ones are the legal ones.
Speaker 1: That's maybe hopefully, well.
Speaker 2: If they're if they're Caribbean, if they're that kind of
Speaker 2: like African descended, No, they might be illegal Africans man
Speaker 2: like they be coming here on fucking scholarships and ship
Speaker 2: they become doctors and stuff, or they take their knowledge
Speaker 2: back to Africa and then they become the leader of
Speaker 2: the tribe or the village.
Speaker 1: Not not these.
Speaker 2: Not these coasts with magic from America.
Speaker 5: What is the deal with their fucking birdsman? With their
Speaker 5: what vocal cords? Oh dude, they're just born noble, are they.
Speaker 1: That's not noble. Sounds like it's dried out. They sound
Speaker 1: like they all live on dune.
Speaker 2: Oh well, dude, that's the that's the native tongue right there.
Speaker 2: You're the one straying from the mother language.
Speaker 1: Okay, all right, to make it all sound pretty and stuff.
Speaker 1: So I go in there and I have these water
Speaker 1: jugs and you fucking switch them out. Now, I'm not
Speaker 1: waiting in line. It's a fucking madhouse in there. I
Speaker 1: don't know why. I don't know what it was. There
Speaker 1: was a sale on Cocoa.
Speaker 2: Because they just put Martin on Max.
Speaker 1: Where the fuck does that? Man? Everyone was running in
Speaker 1: to get Roku boxes.
Speaker 2: Yeah, dude, oh ship, I got Netflix, but I know
Speaker 2: about Max.
Speaker 1: I can only watch it. I can only watch it
Speaker 1: from my phone. No, we could get a Roku box,
Speaker 1: watch it on the TV.
Speaker 2: Oh, it'll be just like old times. Let's get the chicken.
Speaker 2: That's the Walmart.
Speaker 1: So I go in and I find it's frozen.
Speaker 2: No you, okay, it's banquet.
Speaker 1: You know that ship's good.
Speaker 2: It's bomb. It's way better than KFC.
Speaker 1: It's it's it's I would say tied banquet does rule
Speaker 1: though it's very good frozen fried chicken.
Speaker 2: Well, I mean KFC is good frozen fried chicken.
Speaker 1: I don't yeah, fair enough. No, they make it really beer.
Speaker 2: No, dude, they freeze the chicken when they send it
Speaker 2: to the store. They don't cut that chicken up. Oh
Speaker 2: I don't store.
Speaker 1: I don't care about that. I don't cut the chicken
Speaker 1: up myself either.
Speaker 2: They got to thaw out those bags of chicken drumsticks. Dude,
Speaker 2: it's like they get it at Costco. That's dirty. Kill
Speaker 2: the chicken there.
Speaker 1: So I go into Walmart with three of those water jugs.
Speaker 1: It's a fucking manhouse. It's Black Friday for different reasons
Speaker 1: than the one after Thanksgiving, and uh, I fucking I
Speaker 1: find three. All the rest are empty. They're switched out.
Speaker 1: Those exchange machines never fucking work. You never get a ticket,
Speaker 1: so people just like dump the fucking used ones where
Speaker 1: the new ones are and then take a new one.
Speaker 1: There's three left and they're buried underneath. So I go
Speaker 1: reach and I like smash my head and all this
Speaker 1: other bullshit. I get them out, stupid, stupid. I go
Speaker 1: to the self checkout lane. Now you type in water, okay,
Speaker 1: two things come up. Five no, no, no, five gallon.
Speaker 1: These are all five gallon, five gallon no returned bottle,
Speaker 1: okay or five gallon refill. I brought a bottle with me,
Speaker 1: three of them. Okay, Which one am I choosing out
Speaker 1: of those two?
Speaker 2: Wrong?
Speaker 1: You know how I know I was wrong.
Speaker 2: Because you uh, because you're dumb. I don't know how
Speaker 2: it's got to be refilled.
Speaker 1: I pushed my cart to the front. Now here's the thing.
Speaker 1: I didn't notice. Refill was like two dollars. And I
Speaker 1: know for a fact the exchanges are like seven dollars.
Speaker 1: So I will right off the bat say like, I'm
Speaker 1: not arguing, I'm in the right here. This is just
Speaker 1: a story. I know technically it was close to shoplifting.
Speaker 2: Okay, I mean it's all it's borderline, but it's like
Speaker 2: it's water.
Speaker 1: But I literally have what looks like the United Nations
Speaker 1: behind me, okay, in line, screaming, throwing shit at each other,
Speaker 1: and this and that. The guy, the guy running the
Speaker 1: checkout lane looks like the Indian sidekick in Deadpool.
Speaker 2: Oh, okay, dender dong or whatever.
Speaker 1: I think that's probably just a couple of racial slurs
Speaker 1: jammed together there, or maybe just one. So this, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm not going to ask this guy. I'm
Speaker 1: just doing the refill. And I do it, and the
Speaker 1: woman at the front stops me and goes, this isn't enough.
Speaker 1: Oh I'm sorry. She goes, this isn't a It's supposed
Speaker 1: to be a different one. I go, Okay, what do
Speaker 1: we what do we have to do? Like, I'm sure
Speaker 1: I have to leave now. Here's the thing I watch
Speaker 1: when people are shitty to customer service people, and I
Speaker 1: fucking hate it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I hate it, but I'll be I'll be shitty
Speaker 2: if I feel. In this.
Speaker 1: Case, she wasn't even I can't even say she was
Speaker 1: being shitty to me. The situation was so stupid that
Speaker 1: I couldn't possibly accept what was going on. So she goes, no,
Speaker 1: you wrung up the wrong ones. I go, there's two options.
Speaker 1: Explain you fucking moron.
Speaker 2: Well, she's like indignant about it or what wait.
Speaker 1: Wait for the kicker at the end. Okay, there's a
Speaker 1: payoff at the end.
Speaker 2: Of this.
Speaker 1: So she goes, I have to here's here's where, here's
Speaker 1: where I got indignant. She goes, I have to take
Speaker 1: you to customer service, and she leaves the front of
Speaker 1: the store where she was checking receipts, and she just
Speaker 1: had to zero in on mine, wide open. There's not
Speaker 1: another worker there, so everyone is just flowing out. So
Speaker 1: the six dollars potential more you're going to get from
Speaker 1: me is probably negated by some theft that's likely going through.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, dude, someone was just waiting for that. You
Speaker 2: you were a great diversion. I was.
Speaker 1: I was. I was the patsy. I was fucking Lee
Speaker 1: Harvey Oswald shouting it for some fucking wop shoots me
Speaker 1: in the stomach.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, you're dead now. Anyway, So she what does
Speaker 2: she grab you by the arm?
Speaker 1: No, no, no, no, she just she holds my cart
Speaker 1: and she walks me over to customer service. Then she
Speaker 1: stand up by the way, of course, there was a
Speaker 1: line of four people, fucking twelve chickens running around like.
Speaker 2: You know, take he bitch, take care of it.
Speaker 1: Keep the receipt to w Andrew Dice Clay fucking pig.
Speaker 1: So she's waiting in line with me, and then she realizes,
Speaker 1: oh yeah, this is like five minutes We're waiting in
Speaker 1: line already, and I'm not saying a goddamn word to her.
Speaker 1: I'm pissed, and she really I says, oh, I look
Speaker 1: the front open. She goes, I'm gonna go back to
Speaker 1: the front and get someone to cover me. And I go, okay,
Speaker 1: and I'm I'm holding the receipt and she tries to
Speaker 1: take it out. Oh no, she does take it out
Speaker 1: of my hand. I go, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: and she goes, what do you mean, Well, oh, I
Speaker 1: have I have to go back to the front. I go,
Speaker 1: and you need to give me the receipt and she goes, no,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna hold onto it. I go, I have a
Speaker 1: cart full of shit here when no way of saying
Speaker 1: I've paid for it. I don't know if you go
Speaker 1: to the front, I don't know if something's gonna happen
Speaker 1: to you. I don't know what's gonna happen. But you're
Speaker 1: either gonna stay here with the receipt or give me
Speaker 1: the receipt, or I'll push my card up to yeah,
Speaker 1: or I'm gonna punch I'm gonna drill you in your
Speaker 1: sixty five year old cunt mouth.
Speaker 2: Okay, you're just your cut yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and she but she was very nice. She didn't
Speaker 1: get it. She thought I was even dumber than her,
Speaker 1: and that I wasn't processing, that I wasn't processing what
Speaker 1: was happening. Uh So she goes, she goes, yeah, she says,
Speaker 1: She goes, No, you'll you'll be okay if you just
Speaker 1: wait here. I go, this was somewhat threatening. I go,
Speaker 1: you're not going anywhere with my receipt.
Speaker 2: That's nice. You're like holding onto the other end of
Speaker 2: the piece of paper and your your fingers are inching
Speaker 2: closer to her fingers. Yeah.
Speaker 1: So or my hand goes over top of hers and
Speaker 1: starts to squeeze a real tight on the cart.
Speaker 2: Yeah. So her palms are sweating and her wrist is sweaty.
Speaker 2: Your yours is bone.
Speaker 1: So we get up to the front and she hands
Speaker 1: me off with the receipt. She waited the whole time.
Speaker 1: It was just it was a it was an open
Speaker 1: it was an open border at the front of all.
Speaker 2: Yeah, no wonder, there's so many flacks.
Speaker 1: Anyone welcome, Just come on through.
Speaker 2: She's just letting them streaming.
Speaker 1: Oh my god. So the guy refunds me. By the way,
Speaker 1: I had my Apple credit card, which don't doesn't mean shit,
Speaker 1: but it's a nice metal credit card, right, and I
Speaker 1: just I was bored. I was, I swear to you,
Speaker 1: I'm so fucking poor right now. I was not big
Speaker 1: shotting this, but I was playing with the card like
Speaker 1: I was hitting it on the I'm not you know,
Speaker 1: I don't have any money, but I do have autism.
Speaker 1: So I was banging the metal card on the thing.
Speaker 1: I was like, dude, du du da da, And the
Speaker 1: guy's like, okay, I can give you a refund for
Speaker 1: it's gonna be four dollars and sixteen cents. Now here's
Speaker 1: the thing. It's gonna take a few days to clear.
Speaker 1: So if you need that money right now, we can't.
Speaker 1: And I wanted to I just in my head, I
Speaker 1: wanted to be like, don't worry, I got it. But
Speaker 1: at the same time, I was thinking like, yeah, I'm
Speaker 1: not gonna be fucked on this, but I really do
Speaker 1: need that four dollars back, like we need to make.
Speaker 2: Sure that happens.
Speaker 1: So anyway, I say to him, as he's fucking doing
Speaker 1: the refund and ringing me up for the new one.
Speaker 1: The lady walks away. I say, you know that lady
Speaker 1: that was up here and what I stop and I go, nah,
Speaker 1: just forget it, fuck it, I'll just leave it. So
Speaker 1: the lady that stopped me at the front and walked
Speaker 1: me back to customer service worked at a little store
Speaker 1: behind the counter that we referred to as Trade a Tape.
Speaker 2: Oh shit, it was that old biker bitch yep. I
Speaker 2: thought she is dead.
Speaker 1: Nope, she has thinned out. She got a job at
Speaker 1: the Walmart after Trade to Tape closed. Now you'll remember
Speaker 1: this lady as the woman that would sell pornography to chilter. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I was. I was gonna tell that guy. I was
Speaker 1: gonna say, hey, ask her if she used to work
Speaker 1: at Trade a Tape and if she says yes, know
Speaker 1: that that woman used to sell pornography children. I was
Speaker 1: gonna get that going at the and I just was like,
Speaker 1: I paid for my water the leaf.
Speaker 2: Well, I thought you were gonna say, hey, you know
Speaker 2: that lady there, she deserves a raise. I guess you
Speaker 2: just kind of broke even huh on the both of
Speaker 2: our expectations for you.
Speaker 1: She could she could have either been painted as somebody
Speaker 1: who deserved to make a living wage at a place
Speaker 1: like this or a person who basically a pedophile.
Speaker 2: Kind of basically turned us all into pedophiles. You, me,
Speaker 2: and our whole high school graduating class.
Speaker 1: All right, we're gonna wrap this one up. Go to
Speaker 1: your Worst friend dot com. Follow us everywhere on Twitter
Speaker 1: and Instagram at worst friend Cast Patreon dot com slash
Speaker 1: worst friend Cast. Wow, we've really did. We really did.
Speaker 1: It was like a palindrome, no parabola, and we literally
Speaker 1: started with a Walmart story I was going to tell,
Speaker 1: and we went to the center of the jawbreaker and
Speaker 1: back out the other side. No, but we didn't go
Speaker 1: back out the other side. We were reversed. Right Patreon
Speaker 1: dot com sace worst friend Cast. You get a bonus
Speaker 1: episode every week, access to everything ever recorded, entirely commercial free.
Speaker 1: That's it for yours friend, I met, I'm confused, Thanks
Speaker 1: for listening. We'll see you tomorrow, next week, last week.
Speaker 3: You don't follow us all recrud on You're I'm really
Speaker 3: gonna miss you out when
Speaker 1: The show's over.