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<v Speaker 1>Hello everyone, and welcome to Pastor Rick's Daily Hope, the

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<v Speaker 1>Bible teaching ministry that's here to encourage and inspire you

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<v Speaker 1>every day. And today we're continuing our series called Awesome Relationships.

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<v Speaker 1>In it, Rick Warren shares practical ways to help you

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<v Speaker 1>take your relationships with family, friends, co workers, and even

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<v Speaker 1>God from ordinary to extraordinary. And this is a series

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<v Speaker 1>you don't want to miss. Okay, Now here's part two

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<v Speaker 1>of a message called Fighting for an Awesome Marriage.

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<v Speaker 2>The third reason God created marriage for the connection of

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<v Speaker 2>men and women, for the multiplication of human race. Third,

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<v Speaker 2>for the protection of children. God created God invented marriage

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<v Speaker 2>for the protection of children. We all know that kids

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<v Speaker 2>grow better, healthier, stronger when they grow up in a

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<v Speaker 2>stable family, when they grow up in a marriage with

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<v Speaker 2>a mom and a dad. Now, why did God create

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<v Speaker 2>marriage for the protection of children? Because when you were born,

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<v Speaker 2>you were born completely helpless.

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<v Speaker 3>You could not do anything.

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<v Speaker 2>You couldn't feed yourself, you couldn't dress yourself, you couldn't

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<v Speaker 2>change your diaper, you couldn't blow your nose, shoot, you

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<v Speaker 2>couldn't even turn over on your back. When you first started.

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<v Speaker 2>You were literally totally helpless.

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<v Speaker 3>God knew that.

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<v Speaker 2>Human children needed a safe environment, and you were going

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<v Speaker 2>to need somebody to feed you and dress you and

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<v Speaker 2>nurture you. You were going to need somebody to protect you,

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<v Speaker 2>to guide you, to train you, to care for you,

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<v Speaker 2>and all these things. Now, I asked my researchers to

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<v Speaker 2>go out and research all of the national and international

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<v Speaker 2>studies on the effect of marriage or the lack of

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<v Speaker 2>a marriage on children, and I ask them to find

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<v Speaker 2>me all those studies. Here they are. These are not

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<v Speaker 2>Christian studies. These are studies by Harvard University and the

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<v Speaker 2>United States government and the National Institute of Health.

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<v Speaker 3>That's about one hundred and fifty different studies. I want

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<v Speaker 3>to read to you some of the statistics.

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<v Speaker 2>Studies have shown that if children grow up without two parents,

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<v Speaker 2>without a mom and dad, there's.

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<v Speaker 3>An increased risk that they are going to a fail

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<v Speaker 3>in school.

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<v Speaker 2>Kids without two parents are more likely to not graduate

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<v Speaker 2>from college. Kids without two parents are more likely to

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<v Speaker 2>be involved in substance or alcohol abuse. They're more likely

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<v Speaker 2>to experience distress, depression, and the risk of suicide. They're

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<v Speaker 2>more likely to do jail time. They're more likely to

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<v Speaker 2>live their entire lives in poverty, and they're more likely

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<v Speaker 2>to increase the risk that they themselves will divorce or

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<v Speaker 2>will bear children outside of marriage. On the other hand,

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<v Speaker 2>children who live with their own two parents growing up

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<v Speaker 2>statistically of ruth enjoy better physical health than children living

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<v Speaker 2>in any other family form.

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<v Speaker 3>Now I didn't say.

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<v Speaker 2>This is just what one hundred and fifty or so

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<v Speaker 2>studies have shown.

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<v Speaker 3>How about women?

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<v Speaker 2>Studies show that women who marry and stay married have

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<v Speaker 2>lower rates of depression than either single women or mothers

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<v Speaker 2>cohabitating with a guy that they're not married to. Women

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<v Speaker 2>who marry and stay married have a lower risk of

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<v Speaker 2>being a victim of a crime have a lower risk

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<v Speaker 2>of violence in their life. Women who marry and stay

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<v Speaker 2>married have a higher net work than those who are

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<v Speaker 2>living with.

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<v Speaker 3>A man they're not married too. Is that interesting? How

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<v Speaker 3>about men?

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<v Speaker 2>Studies have shown that men who marry and stay married

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<v Speaker 2>earn more money than single men with similar education, job histories,

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<v Speaker 2>and they live Men who marry and stay married live

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<v Speaker 2>longer than single men. Men who marry and stay married

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<v Speaker 2>a mass more net worth than those who live with

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<v Speaker 2>a woman and not being married to them, and men

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<v Speaker 2>who married and stay married have fewer injuries and illnesses.

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<v Speaker 2>What's it saying. It's just seeing real, something real simple.

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<v Speaker 2>When you do it God's way, it works out better

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<v Speaker 2>in your life. Now, every single study done has proven

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<v Speaker 2>that kids develop best with a mom and a dad.

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<v Speaker 2>Now we're in a broken planet, broken worce. Not everything

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<v Speaker 2>works right. We know that, but that doesn't mean that

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<v Speaker 2>we say the ideal isn't real. It is, and the

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<v Speaker 2>statistics bear it out. Children survive and thrive in families,

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<v Speaker 2>not in institutions.

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<v Speaker 3>That's why it's saddle back.

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<v Speaker 2>We don't believe in in orphanages. We don't fund orphanages,

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<v Speaker 2>we don't build orphanages.

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<v Speaker 3>We don't believe in orphanages.

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<v Speaker 2>Why because no kid deserves to grow up in an institution.

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<v Speaker 3>They deserve to grow up in a family. It'd be more.

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<v Speaker 2>Important to help finance a family to take that child in.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, you're in clap for that.

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<v Speaker 2>And children's instrests are best perfected in an intact family.

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<v Speaker 2>Lo does this verse Proverbs fourteen twenty six. Those who

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<v Speaker 2>obey and respect the Lord, in other words, do life

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<v Speaker 2>the way God says to do it. Those who obey

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<v Speaker 2>and respect the Lord have a secure fortress. Their children

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<v Speaker 2>have a place of refuge and security. That's what every

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<v Speaker 2>child needs, growing up a place of refuge and security

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<v Speaker 2>and not worrying his dad going to walk out, his

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<v Speaker 2>mom going to walk out, or whatever. Now you know,

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<v Speaker 2>in the past, used to hear about couples they say, oh,

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<v Speaker 2>they stayed together for the sake of the kids. And

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<v Speaker 2>for many generations when people stayed together for the sake

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<v Speaker 2>of the kids, that was considered an honor, a compliment.

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<v Speaker 2>They're unselfish, they're mature. They stayed together for the sake

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<v Speaker 2>of the kids. Today people laugh at that statement, staying

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<v Speaker 2>together for the sake of kise, what are you talking about?

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<v Speaker 3>You got to do what's best for you? Really do?

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<v Speaker 2>You always have to do what's best for you. That's

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<v Speaker 2>called narcissism. Can you sometimes do something that's maybe best

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<v Speaker 2>for somebody else. Can you sometimes do something that's best

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<v Speaker 2>for somebody for the sake of someone who's more vulnerable

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<v Speaker 2>than you are. That's called maturity, that's called unselfishness, that's

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<v Speaker 2>called love.

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<v Speaker 3>Today, on our narcissistic.

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<v Speaker 2>Culture, we judge everything by I've got to do what's

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<v Speaker 2>best for me.

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<v Speaker 3>No, you don't.

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<v Speaker 2>In fact, you'll never be happy trying to always do

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<v Speaker 2>what's best for you, you'll be a selfish little claude.

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<v Speaker 3>Bitter claude. That's a pastor's cuss word. Number four. Okay.

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<v Speaker 3>God created marriage.

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<v Speaker 2>For the connection of men and women, for the multiplication

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<v Speaker 2>human race.

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<v Speaker 3>It's how we all got here. For the protection of children.

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<v Speaker 3>Number four, This is a big one.

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<v Speaker 2>God created marriage for the perfection of our character. God

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<v Speaker 2>created marriage for the perfection of our character. It is

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<v Speaker 2>in relationships that we learn to be unselfish, we learn

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<v Speaker 2>to be loving. And no relationship has greater impact on

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<v Speaker 2>your life than marriage.

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<v Speaker 3>If you get married.

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<v Speaker 2>Now another one of the facts about when you were born,

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<v Speaker 2>not only were you helpless, you were completely self centered.

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<v Speaker 2>Nothing on the planet Earth is more self centered than

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<v Speaker 2>a new baby. A baby does not even have the

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<v Speaker 2>capacity to think about anyone else.

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<v Speaker 3>All it can think about is itself.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm too hot, I'm too cold, I'm hungry, I just pooped,

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<v Speaker 2>I need to be cleaned up.

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<v Speaker 3>Or whatever. The first word a baby learns is.

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<v Speaker 2>Ah, and it's all about me. As a baby, maturity

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<v Speaker 2>and the purpose of life is to grow up and

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<v Speaker 2>realize it's not all about you. In fact, that real

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<v Speaker 2>happiness comes in giving your life away and.

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<v Speaker 3>Being unselfish, and being serving and being loving.

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<v Speaker 2>And so the whole goal of your life is to

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<v Speaker 2>grow from your total self centered self as a baby

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<v Speaker 2>to being an unselfish adult. Do you know some adults

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<v Speaker 2>who are still selfish babies?

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<v Speaker 3>Yes, you do. Don't look at them, but you know

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<v Speaker 3>who they are. Now.

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<v Speaker 2>This is called maturity. Life is the laboratory of learning

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<v Speaker 2>how to love. Why is love the most important thing

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<v Speaker 2>in life? Because God is love and God wants you

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<v Speaker 2>to become like him. He wants you to learn how

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<v Speaker 2>to love, and we learn to love and learn to

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<v Speaker 2>be unselfish. Now, the Bible says this in Proverbs eighteen one.

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<v Speaker 2>It is selfish and it is stupid to think only

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<v Speaker 2>of yourself.

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<v Speaker 3>And so how do I get out of that?

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<v Speaker 2>Well, marriage is a lifelong course in learning to be unselfish,

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<v Speaker 2>because once you get married, I can no longer think

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<v Speaker 2>about me. I got to think about we. I can't

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<v Speaker 2>think about just me and myself and hones. How many

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<v Speaker 2>of you as who are married, had to learn pretty

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<v Speaker 2>quickly that once you got married, you couldn't always do

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<v Speaker 2>whatever you wanted to do.

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<v Speaker 3>The rest of your liars.

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<v Speaker 2>Because you don't get to do everything you want to do.

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<v Speaker 2>Once you get married, you have to learn to compromise.

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<v Speaker 2>You have to learn to think of the other person,

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<v Speaker 2>and marriage is the laboratory.

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<v Speaker 3>For learning how to love.

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<v Speaker 2>Now, listen, God wants to make you like Jesus Christ.

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<v Speaker 2>It's the number one goal in his life. He wants

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<v Speaker 2>you to grow up. He wants to build character. You're

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<v Speaker 2>not taking your car, your career, your clothes to heaven.

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<v Speaker 2>You are taking your character. So the most important thing

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<v Speaker 2>you can do in life is build your character. The

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<v Speaker 2>number one tool that God uses in your life to

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<v Speaker 2>build christ like character.

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<v Speaker 3>If you are married, is your spouse.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh no, yep, because every day you get hundreds of

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<v Speaker 2>opportunities to not think about you. You get opportunities to

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<v Speaker 2>think of the other person, to care about them. You say,

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<v Speaker 2>but my spouse, my husband, my wife is not even

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<v Speaker 2>a Christian. They're not a follower of Jesus, they're not

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<v Speaker 2>a believer. Doesn't matter, they don't have to be saved.

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<v Speaker 2>There's still God's number one tool to make you like

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<v Speaker 2>Christ as they're closest to you and they have that

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<v Speaker 2>most impact.

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<v Speaker 3>I want you to write this down in your outline.

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<v Speaker 2>The number one purpose of marriage is to make me holy,

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<v Speaker 2>not happy. That is so counterculture, but it's the true.

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<v Speaker 2>Now here's the interesting thing. Once you become holy, that's

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<v Speaker 2>how you get happiness. Being holy makes you happy. But

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<v Speaker 2>God's purpose in your life is to make you holy,

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<v Speaker 2>not happy. And that's the purpose of God's marriage for

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<v Speaker 2>your life is that you become more loving, more giving,

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<v Speaker 2>more serving, more sharing, more mature, more unselfish. And as

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<v Speaker 2>you become that, guess what you get more happiness. You'll

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<v Speaker 2>never be happy if you make it the goal of

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<v Speaker 2>your life. Happiness is elusive as a goal. It's never

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<v Speaker 2>meant to be a goal. It's like a butterfly. You're

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<v Speaker 2>always reaching for it and you never get it. When

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<v Speaker 2>you start caring about other people rather than your happiness,

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<v Speaker 2>you're going to get happy, just the way God wired

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<v Speaker 2>the universe. So God wants us to learn how to

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<v Speaker 2>love in marriage. Romans twelve says this love sincerely, hold

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<v Speaker 2>on to what is good, be devoted to each other

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<v Speaker 2>like a loving family.

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<v Speaker 3>Excel in showing respect for each other.

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<v Speaker 2>Do you do that in your marriage? Do you have

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<v Speaker 2>a competition of who can show the most respect? I'm

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<v Speaker 2>gonna beat you to dan being more respectful to you.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm going to beat you todaan being more loving, excel

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<v Speaker 2>in showing respect for each other. You know, before I

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<v Speaker 2>got married so many years ago, I really thought I

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<v Speaker 2>knew how.

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<v Speaker 3>To love a woman. I knew nothing about love. Nothing.

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<v Speaker 2>Now, after thirty nine years of marriage, I know that

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<v Speaker 2>love washes the dishes.

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<v Speaker 3>I know that love takes out the garbage shoot when

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<v Speaker 3>you're sick. Love changes the bedpan.

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<v Speaker 2>And out of that kind of love comes a connection

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<v Speaker 2>and a companionship that gives you the strength and the

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<v Speaker 2>stability to handle enormous amounts of stress.

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<v Speaker 3>When you know someone that well and you're just committed

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<v Speaker 3>to each other. Because of that reason. Number five.

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<v Speaker 2>God made marriage for the connection of men and women,

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<v Speaker 2>the multiplication human race, protection of children, the perfection of

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<v Speaker 2>our characters. God created marriage for the construction of society.

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<v Speaker 2>Marriage is the fundamental building block of every community, church, state, nation, society,

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<v Speaker 2>and culture.

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<v Speaker 3>If you know anything.

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<v Speaker 2>About history, you know that where marriages are strong, cultures

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<v Speaker 2>and nations are strong, empires are strong. You know that

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<v Speaker 2>wherever marriages and families are weak, cultures nations are in decline.

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<v Speaker 2>And we know that this that when marriages are devalued.

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<v Speaker 2>The more a nation is in decline, it's real obvious

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<v Speaker 2>what direction our nation is headed right now.

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<v Speaker 3>America is not getting better, it's not getting stronger. It's

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<v Speaker 3>going the other direction.

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<v Speaker 2>Why because we don't value marriage and family anymore. We

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<v Speaker 2>value it's all about me. I got to do what's

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<v Speaker 2>best for me. We've made individualism an idol. So this

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<v Speaker 2>for the construction of society. Proverbs fourteen thirty four says,

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<v Speaker 2>this righteousness that means doing it God's way lifts up

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<v Speaker 2>a nation. But sin not doing it God's way, brings

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<v Speaker 2>disgrace to any society. Number six, This is the most

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<v Speaker 2>important reason of all. And many of you have never

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<v Speaker 2>ever even heard this reason for marriage. But it's the primary,

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<v Speaker 2>the deepest, and the most or found reason that God

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<v Speaker 2>created marriage between a man and a woman, and the

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<v Speaker 2>unity of sex and all of that that involves. God

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<v Speaker 2>created marriage for the reflection of our union with Christ,

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<v Speaker 2>for the reflection of our union with Christ.

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<v Speaker 3>It is Marriage is a metaphor, it is a symbol.

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<v Speaker 2>It's a walking, living object lesson of how much God

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<v Speaker 2>loves us and how we are to be in relationship

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<v Speaker 2>with him. Marriage is a model of a profound spiritual truth.

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<v Speaker 2>I said, it's a metaphor of showing us how we're

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<v Speaker 2>to relate to God. Now let me show you one

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<v Speaker 2>of the deepest passages in scripture, and Paul is actually

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<v Speaker 2>talking about the church in Christ, but he uses marriage

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<v Speaker 2>as a metaphor.

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<v Speaker 3>They're on your outline.

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<v Speaker 2>Ephesians chapter five says this, Husbands, love your wives as Christ.

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<v Speaker 2>Christ loved the Church and gave himself up for her.

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<v Speaker 2>How did Christ love the church? He sacrifices life. He

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<v Speaker 2>died for the church. He says, Husbands, that's the way

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<v Speaker 2>you're to love your wife. You're to die for your wife.

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<v Speaker 2>That's the kind of love your dad, sacrificial love, where

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<v Speaker 2>her needs are so before yours that you sacrifice your life. Husbands,

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<v Speaker 2>love your wives just as Christ loved the Church and

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<v Speaker 2>gave himself up for her. He Christ died so that

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<v Speaker 2>he could give the Church to himself as a bride

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<v Speaker 2>in all her beauty. In the same way, husbands should

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<v Speaker 2>love their wives as they love their own bodies. No

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<v Speaker 2>one ever hates his own body, but he feeds it,

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<v Speaker 2>he takes care of it, and that is what Christ

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<v Speaker 2>does for his church.

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<v Speaker 3>His body. See, the church is a bride in church

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<v Speaker 3>is a body.

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<v Speaker 2>Now, the scripture says, and he's quoting the verse in

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<v Speaker 2>Genesis we just looked at and the scripture says, a

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<v Speaker 2>man is united with his wife and the two become

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<v Speaker 2>one body. This is a profound mystery. But I'm talking

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<v Speaker 2>about Christ and the Church. Wait, wait a minute, Paul,

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<v Speaker 2>I thought you're talking about Mary's here. Husband's no, he says, Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>I know, I'm used in marriage. But it's a metaphor

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<v Speaker 2>of our spiritual union with Christ and Christ and his

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<v Speaker 2>love for his family, his body, his bride, the Christ,

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<v Speaker 2>the Church. So he says, because marriage is a metaphor

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<v Speaker 2>of Christ and the Church.

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<v Speaker 3>So each husband.

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<v Speaker 2>Must love his wife as much as he loves himself,

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<v Speaker 2>as he loves himself. And it says each wife must

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<v Speaker 2>respect her husband. Now that passage is so deep, I'm

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<v Speaker 2>gonna have to take a whole other message sometime and

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<v Speaker 2>explain it in detail. But let me just say it

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<v Speaker 2>this way. This is the most profound meaning of marriage.

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<v Speaker 2>There's some benefits of marriage that are obvious and quantifiable,

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<v Speaker 2>like these, what it does to kids, what it does

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<v Speaker 2>to women, what it does to men, the benefits of

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<v Speaker 2>an intact marriage for life are incontrovertible, irrefutable. And there

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<v Speaker 2>are a lot of benefits to marriage that you can

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<v Speaker 2>just look at, you know, empirically judging the scientific data.

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<v Speaker 2>But this one, the most profound meaning of marriage is

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<v Speaker 2>is not as easy to grasp. It's harder to understand

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<v Speaker 2>and appreciate how marriage reflects our union with Christ and

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<v Speaker 2>our relationship Tim now listen. No other real relationship on

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<v Speaker 2>planet Earth. None, none, including parent child relationship.

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<v Speaker 3>No other relationship can.

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<v Speaker 2>Adequately illustrate our union with Christ the way a marriage

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<v Speaker 2>between a man and a woman does. This is the

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<v Speaker 2>strongest reason, this number six, why marriage matters. This is

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<v Speaker 2>the strongest reason why marriage cannot be redefined. This is

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<v Speaker 2>the strongest reason why it must be protected at all costs.

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<v Speaker 2>Because we are the body of Christ. We are the

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<v Speaker 2>bright of Christ in union with Christ, and marriage is

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<v Speaker 2>that metaphor?

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<v Speaker 1>Thanks so much, Rick, what a great message today. Hey,

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<v Speaker 1>if you've been listening to the broadcast for a while,

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<v Speaker 1>well you know that Rick is always saying that God

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<v Speaker 1>wants your relationship to be more than just fair, average, good,

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<v Speaker 1>or even great. He wants your relationships to be awesome,

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<v Speaker 1>life giving, filled with joy and purpose, and that's why

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<v Speaker 1>he created the Awesome Relationships Bible Study. Through this four

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<v Speaker 1>session video based Bible study with workbook, you'll discover the

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<v Speaker 1>tools you need to build an awesome marriage and family,

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<v Speaker 1>awesome friendships, and most importantly, an awesome relationship with God.

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<v Speaker 1>This resource is perfect for individual or group study. Be

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00:20:33.640 --> 00:20:38.359
<v Speaker 1>sure to request Pastor Rick's Awesome Relationships Video based Bible Study.

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00:20:38.559 --> 00:20:41.119
<v Speaker 1>When you give a gift to help Daily Hope take

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00:20:41.160 --> 00:20:44.279
<v Speaker 1>the Hope of Jesus to a hurting world, it's our

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00:20:44.319 --> 00:20:48.200
<v Speaker 1>way of saying thanks. Just go to pastorick dot com

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<v Speaker 1>to get your copy of this great resource. That's pastorick

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00:20:52.079 --> 00:20:54.960
<v Speaker 1>dot com. Or you can text the word hope to

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<v Speaker 1>seven oh three oh nine. Again, that's the word hope

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00:20:58.480 --> 00:21:01.279
<v Speaker 1>to seven oh three to zero nine. Be sure to

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<v Speaker 1>join us next time as we look into God's word

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<v Speaker 1>for our daily hope. This program is sponsored by Pastor

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<v Speaker 1>Rick's Daily Hope and your generous financial support