Speaker 1: What up is mustle you're checking out the Cruise Show podcast.
Speaker 1: Make sure to subscribe right and ship the leap as spars.
Speaker 1: That is back on the Cruise Show. So food, what's up? Food?
Speaker 1: What's up? Crucial? Doggie? Hello? Everybody doing it? You get
Speaker 1: your daughter right here? Now what man crew said, you
Speaker 1: gotta pay that support. We can't got your daughter here.
Speaker 1: Raging Food on Netflix is out. Now it's out now, man,
Speaker 1: go watch it. Man, Yes, sir, bootlegged salad. No, you
Speaker 1: don't want anyone bootlegging. Yeah they botleg let me the
Speaker 1: way you solid. So that's right, as long as it's
Speaker 1: a This is your fourth special, Philip, my fourth special,
Speaker 1: and yeah, man, my fourth special, my second one with Netflix.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, very cool. But it wasn't a deal with Netflix.
Speaker 1: They didn't come up to me and go, hey, man,
Speaker 1: we want a two comedy deal. I had to like
Speaker 1: put on my own money and pay for everything and
Speaker 1: then started to Netflix's what it takes. So now at
Speaker 1: least they watched it, you know, it's fun and like
Speaker 1: sometimes they grab comedies specially without watching them and put
Speaker 1: them up there like one hour ted talk no jokes.
Speaker 1: When I were about me and celebrity hanging out.
Speaker 2: Now, it takes like, you know, you know, putting your
Speaker 2: own money in and your own time and uh and
Speaker 2: developing it.
Speaker 1: I think that's how they know. You know you're in.
Speaker 1: If you're in, then they're in. Right. It's hard, Bro
Speaker 1: to like write new jokes, you know. Yeah, it's like
Speaker 1: you come up with them, but then like you forget
Speaker 1: about them, man, So you gotta write them down just
Speaker 1: recording on my phone? That's right? Is that what you do?
Speaker 1: Rather you just recorded your phone? How many jokes do
Speaker 1: you have in that phone? Bro? That we haven't heard?
Speaker 1: A lot Bros going through my now? A lot of
Speaker 1: them in funny man, Well they're they're you're working on them, right. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I have a joke where I say that I remember
Speaker 1: when I was a young man, a kid, I wanted
Speaker 1: to watch Ozzie bro like Ozzy Osbourne when I was
Speaker 1: a kid, like where my mom said, no, man, he
Speaker 1: watches the Devil you know, but now and needs to
Speaker 1: buy bats bro like and pigeons on stage. But now
Speaker 1: that he's old, do I want to watch him now
Speaker 1: that I could afford to watch him? Bro? Old Bro?
Speaker 1: Now he's on stage eating a cliff bar. Yeah, he's
Speaker 1: sitting down the whole story, the whole show to put
Speaker 1: up smoke, you know, because they're gonna wheel him in there.
Speaker 1: You know you don't want to see him now. You
Speaker 1: know it's sad, Bro, Like the whole show Sponsorbley depends
Speaker 1: it's over by four pm. Yeah that does sound kind
Speaker 1: of nice.
Speaker 2: Imagine bro, that'd be crazy, bro. But yeah, it's kind
Speaker 2: of sad, you know.
Speaker 1: Now. We just want to appreciate him from far away. Yeah, man,
Speaker 1: you're just watching him on television. Man, you don't want
Speaker 1: your feelings hurt. Hey.
Speaker 2: In Raging Fool, you talk about your dad cheating on
Speaker 2: your mom.
Speaker 1: Yeah, bro, I come on, da cheating on my mom. Bro.
Speaker 1: The same time he caught memoking weed crazy. We both
Speaker 1: just looked at each other.
Speaker 2: You talk about your wife as well, right, and your
Speaker 2: wife doesn't mind. I mean I know that you two
Speaker 2: are in business together. She's your manager.
Speaker 1: Yeah, man, I talk about how you gotta remember a
Speaker 1: smart woman. Man, two dumb people ain't gonna make it.
Speaker 1: That's right, that's right. I've been there. Yeah, Man, dumb
Speaker 1: couple break up in parking lots.
Speaker 2: Bro, that's right, that's right. Over something dumb yeah, they
Speaker 2: can't find a car.
Speaker 1: Yo.
Speaker 2: Why didn't me and Dan again into a crazy argument
Speaker 2: at Dodge Stadium was because we couldn't find the.
Speaker 1: Car Meal, Yeah, I know right. You get like you'll
Speaker 1: get into a father your whether your loved one over,
Speaker 1: like stuff that you would let your friends slide, you know,
Speaker 1: like you're like your friend could like make ten horrible
Speaker 1: wrong left turns, Bro, and get lost. You want me
Speaker 1: one wrong U turn? You're like, you know they're looking
Speaker 1: at us. Now, that's so true while you stop in
Speaker 1: the middle of traffic.
Speaker 2: Like the smallest shit makes you so angry. I know
Speaker 2: why Raging Food, Oh, because I saw that movie Raging
Speaker 2: Bull Legendary Classes, and I remember that in that movie
Speaker 2: when Jake Lamont, you know, he was done with his
Speaker 2: life and he had nothing else to do with his life.
Speaker 1: No, what am I going to do now? I'm not
Speaker 1: a boxer. I just came out of jail for serving
Speaker 1: young minders in my bar. What should I do now?
Speaker 1: He said, you know what, I'll do stand up comedy.
Speaker 1: So he started doing stand up comedy, Bro, And I figured, wow,
Speaker 1: he had no That's how I started because I had
Speaker 1: nothing else better to do, because I ran into things.
Speaker 1: I wasn't good at so and this old this old
Speaker 1: guy man. And when I used to work at Dodger Stadium,
Speaker 1: this guy like he was a teacher full time and
Speaker 1: he used to work with me at yoshio Ya at
Speaker 1: Dodger Stadium. And he goes, man, you've been entertaining me
Speaker 1: for four seasons, for full seasons killing it. Yeah, man,
Speaker 1: you should try to be a comedian or something, right,
Speaker 1: you know how I wanted to, man, but I don't
Speaker 1: know I should try it. And then I told my dad.
Speaker 1: Remember I told my dad I want to be a comedian,
Speaker 1: and he goes, yeah, And you you could tell when
Speaker 1: you meet Paul Driguez, tell him to costide it for you. Wow,
Speaker 1: Like just fame is that easy? Bro? Right?
Speaker 2: Exactly exactly right? Were you ever high on stage? Like
Speaker 2: really really high? In the beginning, I wasn't. I was sober.
Speaker 2: I was sober. I didn't drink or smoke. No, I
Speaker 2: was sober.
Speaker 1: But then you know, like people start hanging out laid
Speaker 1: with loser comics you know, have habits, you know, and
Speaker 1: they're like, hey, man, you want to bump? I thought
Speaker 1: you never ask? Right, start staying up to do this networking. Networking,
Speaker 1: right right, we should collaborate. That's write a few jokes. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you're a mirror in my straw. Let's collab. You know
Speaker 1: I never used a straw, man, it's sad. Did you
Speaker 1: use the dollar bill? Dollar bills? Yeah, the no, theydn't
Speaker 1: have that either, man, ll just rock it up, bro
Speaker 1: go all the way, bro that was my habit. Man.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I liked that rocking it up man. Man, look
Speaker 2: at him. It's taking them back, traveling back.
Speaker 1: To that maybe twenty four hour laundro. Man. That's right,
Speaker 1: that's right. That's a good time for one of those
Speaker 1: puzzle because Zuku's even know to know what I'm doing,
Speaker 1: just like looking smarty, right right, right. Hey.
Speaker 2: In Raging four, you also talk about getting beat up
Speaker 2: in front of your family. That's always tough. Yeah, man,
Speaker 2: do I yes, what's in the trailer? Yeah, see we
Speaker 2: took him way back.
Speaker 1: Oh that's right. Oh yeah, road rage, I don't come
Speaker 1: back from the flashback scene. First, there's so many roads.
Speaker 1: There's so many road rages. Brovin won't tell me. I
Speaker 1: have to road rage. And like, I followed this guy
Speaker 1: who cut me off, and we're both flipping his shoulder off. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Then I followed him inside the supermarket. Bro, I'll behind
Speaker 1: him at Bonds with my shopping cart. Nah. Now you're
Speaker 1: on foot, yeah, bro, now getting close to assault. Never
Speaker 1: follow I used to do that.
Speaker 2: I don't know what why, I don't know, I don't know.
Speaker 2: But late to work now, bro, right, because he's trying
Speaker 2: to die. I'll tell people pull over, full pull over,
Speaker 2: they will pull over.
Speaker 1: I keep going, Bro, that's right, that's rights. Watch him
Speaker 1: get out of their car and then peel off. I know,
Speaker 1: I know that's my dad's move. We're talking about my friend.
Speaker 1: The night we got to a fight with this guy
Speaker 1: in a range Rover and on Melrose and then we
Speaker 1: were honking. Then we both got off and then well
Speaker 1: the thrill will looked at each other. This is stupid, right, Yeah,
Speaker 1: we were back in our car and we left, so
Speaker 1: so we agreed on just being this is stupid, right,
Speaker 1: we all say the same time. There we went back here.
Speaker 1: I just gave up on the whole thing. He was
Speaker 1: like he would killed us, Bro, that's right. He came
Speaker 1: out in shape. He was one of the one of
Speaker 1: the combat aerobic instructors. That's right, Like those do that
Speaker 1: never been to the Armor of the Marines. You know,
Speaker 1: Barry's boot camp. There's one of those, bro, They're an
Speaker 1: echo park man.
Speaker 3: Hey, that teacher that inspired you kind of are pushed
Speaker 3: you in that direction? Did he Has he ever been
Speaker 3: to one of your shows out of curiosity? Have you
Speaker 3: ever got an opportunity to go back and thank him
Speaker 3: or anything?
Speaker 1: No, but they run into the people that used to
Speaker 1: run that rehab. I run into one of the guys.
Speaker 1: He went to my show and Las Vegas back in
Speaker 1: the day. What's up, brother, donation now that you're doing well? Yeah, man,
Speaker 1: the guy that used to run the rehab where I
Speaker 1: was at, he was from this area, from San Fernando
Speaker 1: and Proco in my area. Yeah. And then I guess
Speaker 1: he was like a bank robber, bro. He robbed all
Speaker 1: the banks in Fresno County. Yeah. And then he just
Speaker 1: gave himself up to the lord. That's right, that's right,
Speaker 1: that's the move. Yeah, that's the move. Re opened up
Speaker 1: a rehabit and he must have helped like thousands of
Speaker 1: people quit drugs. That's right. Cool.
Speaker 2: My man turned his life around. You know, Phelipe man
Speaker 2: takes care of people, you know what I mean? Hooks
Speaker 2: people up with tickets. But I've seen it, right, But
Speaker 2: how do you feel about people that hit you up
Speaker 2: and they're like, yo, Bro, I'm going through this. I'm
Speaker 2: going through that, Bro, Please help me.
Speaker 1: It's sad, bro. Like I had a woman hit me up. Bro.
Speaker 1: She said that her mom was dying. Bro. Her mom
Speaker 1: died and they needed forty five thousand dollars to bury her.
Speaker 1: And I was like, damn, did you mama ever make
Speaker 1: forty five thousand dollar him one year? Because I think
Speaker 1: your funeral should be the amount of money made that
Speaker 1: year that after you worked. That would be fair. My
Speaker 1: mom was cremated bro, two weeks ago. Bro. Everybody got
Speaker 1: to keep her ashes. Wow. Yeah, man, that's why I
Speaker 1: want to die. When I died, I want to be cremated.
Speaker 1: I don't want to be a burden to my family.
Speaker 1: I'm going to get a burden them to them a life,
Speaker 1: right right, that's true. I don't want to be I
Speaker 1: want everybody to take my ashes with them home, bro,
Speaker 1: and you know, mix it up with your weed, mix
Speaker 1: it up with your coke. Smoke me, you know, and
Speaker 1: then like snort me. Bro. I want to see somebody
Speaker 1: bleeding at the after party, Bro, I believe it. That's
Speaker 1: a T shirt and let me bro snort me Bro,
Speaker 1: they're bleeding, Bro, what happened? Bro? Bro? I guess they
Speaker 1: must to cremated him in a cheap PLP bro imanst
Speaker 1: to snort it a bone and sad, Bro, like I
Speaker 1: had a friend die like he died like in nineteen,
Speaker 1: you know, two thousand and two, when I was really
Speaker 1: sad and broke. He died over me twenty five hundred dollars. Bro.
Speaker 1: I had that mixed emotions that day. Man. That's right,
Speaker 1: that's right, because y'all Bro, I remember Bro going to
Speaker 1: his mom's house, Bro, and and I was like still hurt,
Speaker 1: you know. But after Man, did you're still leave anything behind?
Speaker 1: Like an envelope like condina something? That's right? Yeah, Man,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna away check in his pockets. Everybody was like, no, man,
Speaker 1: he died so young. He died so young, Nah, man,
Speaker 1: he died too soon. He too had so much to
Speaker 1: give give me. Bro. They were were bury this fool
Speaker 1: his cell phone, No, Bro, they kept ringing during the
Speaker 1: to the funeral. They shouldn't let me have it, Bro,
Speaker 1: just to hear message. What happened Julio, you left all
Speaker 1: mad with my motorcycle helmet you were rather you took
Speaker 1: off all married mona. You know, hikes, Bro, what happened?
Speaker 1: What happened? Bro? We miss you hey? After we saw
Speaker 1: you were scoring on one of the water red in that
Speaker 1: Asla neighborhood.
Speaker 2: Would you have settled to snort him?
Speaker 1: Now? Bro? To probably like cut his ashes? Brother? How
Speaker 1: much gold he had in his teeth? Bro? First? Right,
Speaker 1: that's right? For sure? Yo.
Speaker 2: Your wife is educated, right, She's got degrees on top
Speaker 2: of degrees?
Speaker 1: Right? Is that? Is that ever intimidating? Yeah? Bro, I
Speaker 1: don't even have I don't even have a pedigree. Bro Right, Yeah,
Speaker 1: my wife a bachelor's degree and a master's degree. Crazy,
Speaker 1: that's right, So I don't have to google anything, bro,
Speaker 1: Just go ask her, ask her. She's got the answer.
Speaker 1: I'm like a five year old. Why is this guy blue?
Speaker 1: Why is the sky blue? I look up? Like random?
Speaker 1: She's like, why are eggs white? How? A? My wife like?
Speaker 1: Why do why am I? Why do I? Why am
Speaker 1: I six foot one but my legs are twenty eight? Right?
Speaker 1: Doesn't make sense? Right? Yeah? Man, I'm not a tall Perton.
Speaker 1: I'm a tall little person for real. Bro, That's what
Speaker 1: when you look at my body and you see six
Speaker 1: foot one and you see that I have a very
Speaker 1: large tour, So like, yeah, if it looks like I'm
Speaker 1: standing up right now, you are tall. But when I
Speaker 1: when I when I stand up on the same height,
Speaker 1: that's short legs. Bro. That means that we were called knights,
Speaker 1: Bro because the Mayans. You know, the after there were
Speaker 1: Shore Bro little Warriors five foot two, five three, you know,
Speaker 1: then the Mayans came in bright six two. You know Spaniards. Bro.
Speaker 1: It's like mixing that you wa the pet bull Bro.
Speaker 1: That's right, because I have like a great Dane body, Bro,
Speaker 1: But I have a legs, That's right. They look long though,
Speaker 1: I'm like a centaur. Bro. Are you excited about the Dodgers? Yeah? Man,
Speaker 1: I went to one game last year. One game, yeah, man,
Speaker 1: right behind home play Bro. That's right. What it was
Speaker 1: season on? Bro? Like how great it was to be
Speaker 1: back on top again? Man? Man, Man, I'm so glad
Speaker 1: man because can I remember like the eighty eight World
Speaker 1: Series and then this one. Bro. I remember when Kirk
Speaker 1: Gibson hit that home run. Bro. Every time I had sex,
Speaker 1: I was like, come, on, come on, that's right, that's right.
Speaker 1: With a bad leg too, come on with a bump leg.
Speaker 1: I remember wh when the Dodgers lost ninety nine games Bro,
Speaker 1: back in the day Bro and Tammy Soda. Was he
Speaker 1: lost like ninety eight pounds? Bro? Because of us? He
Speaker 1: was doing those Jenny Craig commercials right right, like when
Speaker 1: I first started writing jokes, you know, and I wanted
Speaker 1: to be a comedian. He goes, Man, Tamalo Soda loses
Speaker 1: ninety eight pounds and the Dodger lose one hundred games.
Speaker 1: He goes on that Jenny Craig, Man, he should start
Speaker 1: eating a game. Bro, bring back Tommy Lasagna right right,
Speaker 1: breaking back. Have you ever thrown out the first pitch? Yeah?
Speaker 2: Bro?
Speaker 1: In two thousand and ten, Yeah, I threw out the
Speaker 1: first twenty eleven, I threw out the first pitch when
Speaker 1: I won last Comic Standing. Oh very cool. Yeah man,
Speaker 1: it was good. Bro. I'll practice in the Allegian Park
Speaker 1: all day and I was practicing my knuckleball because I
Speaker 1: wanted to throw a knuckle And when I get there,
Speaker 1: it's a mound, bro. Yes. And if you grew up
Speaker 1: in the inner City, you never pasted on a mound ever,
Speaker 1: not even a cardboard box. I did it. It's like,
Speaker 1: what am I doing? You're throwing down? Yes, I mean
Speaker 1: were you two like throwing straight right? Yeah, you know kickball,
Speaker 1: you know straight right, But this is like up on
Speaker 1: a hill, bro. Yeah yeah, man, Larry yees a rich
Speaker 1: man sport. That's right.
Speaker 2: I heard a story about you and last comic same
Speaker 2: You won, and then immediately you had to go on
Speaker 2: tour with the guys that lost, and you guys are
Speaker 2: stuck on a bus and everybody like was looking at you.
Speaker 1: You know, they were upset because you won. They were
Speaker 1: all saddy.
Speaker 2: They were all sad because every comedians are so competitive.
Speaker 2: And then you bought like the driver a jacket or something,
Speaker 2: and then they realized, oh man, he's just a normal guy.
Speaker 1: He's a nice guy. He's not an asshole. Yeah man, right. Yeah.
Speaker 1: We're on the bus, all six of us touring bro
Speaker 1: eighty five cities, and I was a headliner at every show.
Speaker 1: But we're all doing the same amount of time twenty minutes,
Speaker 1: and a lot of them thought that the show was
Speaker 1: rid or whatever. Yeah, you know, but I won, And
Speaker 1: because I remember the guy that in charge of NBC
Speaker 1: Universal was when they merged. It was the main guy
Speaker 1: that was in charge of We're gonna put Friends on
Speaker 1: Tuesday nights. We're gonna put whatever show after Wednesday. That dude, Bro,
Speaker 1: the big shot he got. He came, he came out
Speaker 1: of the corner after I won, and he goes Philippe,
Speaker 1: you know, big Columbian accident. He goes congratulations. I don't
Speaker 1: know if you noticed, but you know, we had big
Speaker 1: ratings in cities that we normally don't get big ratings.
Speaker 1: You know, the show because I was on but like
Speaker 1: Pacific Northwest, Bro, like Seattle, nobody watches the NBC over there,
Speaker 1: but they were watching it that day. They had like
Speaker 1: eleven point two million people watching it. When I want cool,
Speaker 1: that's crazy. Sure it was sad people, Bro, Yeah, sad.
Speaker 1: There was one time where we went to his place
Speaker 1: in the middle of nowhere, Bro, like Allentown, Pennsylvania. I've
Speaker 1: only heard that in songs, Bro, with Billy Joe Shining
Speaker 1: down the plant in Allentown Billy Joe's song. They were like,
Speaker 1: get there, Bro, and then running a front. There was
Speaker 1: like these old be Hito, these old Polish couple, Bro,
Speaker 1: like the seventies and they were wearing t shirts that
Speaker 1: said Team Phelippe. So cool, and I'm like, whoa, bro
Speaker 1: I crossed over? But like PARTRICI said, bro. I asked
Speaker 1: the one time man, how do you cross over your
Speaker 1: jokes so that everyone in America can understand them, not
Speaker 1: just some black people and Mexicans. And he goes, Wow,
Speaker 1: you don't gonna worry about that, because if you're fun,
Speaker 1: you go across over to you. That's right, that's right.
Speaker 3: Hey, speaking of TV, I saw you on Shifting Gears.
Speaker 1: Hell yeah, bro Man.
Speaker 3: I was like, hey, look at Philip Man. That's a
Speaker 3: good show. It's a funny, funny sitcom. Did you work
Speaker 3: with Tim Allen? And then how was that?
Speaker 1: Dude? He is og Man. My friend Morgan Murphy, she's
Speaker 1: a writer on the show, and she wrote me in
Speaker 1: one of the characters, Bob and Man. I never worked
Speaker 1: on a multi camera, only works single cam because I'm
Speaker 1: super stared with one camera and they just follow you
Speaker 1: around and there's that camera everywhere, so you really got
Speaker 1: to do it that many takes. But on that one
Speaker 1: it's like a play. You know, every every scene is
Speaker 1: in a different room, so all they do is shift
Speaker 1: the camera to the next place and then you move
Speaker 1: your body over there and you act right there. So
Speaker 1: that like a play. And I don't know that about
Speaker 1: cars to choose. My wife knows everything about cars too, too,
Speaker 1: like my besides acting, Oh I what's concerned about was
Speaker 1: not scratching Tim Allen's covered buckle. There you go, there
Speaker 1: you go, Bro. I had. I had a hammer and
Speaker 1: a screwdriver, bro, and I was pretending I was fixing
Speaker 1: something in there. Bro. And then Tim Allen's daughter, she's
Speaker 1: like a technical advisor and she she's in charge of
Speaker 1: all of the cars. She told me so she knew
Speaker 1: the scene and she said you have to hold this
Speaker 1: too and this too if you're gonna go in there
Speaker 1: like that. And then I was holding a hammer, Bro,
Speaker 1: and U and a screwdriver. Bro. I was like a transmission. Bro.
Speaker 1: You know when if I look at the gasoline and
Speaker 1: trying to start, it look like you were trying to
Speaker 1: steal it. I know. Boom, Let's go Felipe.
Speaker 2: As far as a raging food on Netflix, now, it's
Speaker 2: just for a special, you know, Philpople, We love you
Speaker 2: here man, thank you very much for your time.
Speaker 1: We're having me Fool. What's up everybody? Check out Raging
Speaker 1: Fool and check out my podcast What's Up Food and
Speaker 1: the History for Foods podcasts where you can learn about
Speaker 1: history and laugh. That's right.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's it's it's it's comedy and history all in one, right.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Bro.
Speaker 1: We talk about a lot of stuff, bro, like the
Speaker 1: history of stand up comedy, the history of Native American
Speaker 1: stand up comedy. We had a real estate problem and
Speaker 1: that's the name of the book. And we had the
Speaker 1: history of the Irish Uprising of nineteen sixteen. That's right,
Speaker 1: that's right, that's right. The history of serial killers. I
Speaker 1: love that, love that. Yeah, man, Jackie is a big
Speaker 1: fan of that.
Speaker 2: Felippe Spars appreciated man, Netflix, Raging Food, Let's go What's
Speaker 2: Up Food?
Speaker 1: Hey Jackie Ridge.
Speaker 2: For the Cruise Show.
Speaker 1: Thanks for listening to The Cruise Show podcast. Make sure
Speaker 1: to subscribe and hey, auto download so you don't miss
Speaker 1: an episode.