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Speaker 1: Today we go into part two of The Father that

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Every Man Wants to Become with Scott Uncle Back. Enjoy

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getting his three key rates for what makes a great father.

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Just know that everything he shares has been proven over

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decades and that it is not something that is a

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quick fix in a day. But with God's help, anything

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is possible. Now enjoy the episode That's Impossible. Let me

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tell you what I believe.

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Speaker 2: It's your weakness, it's not your technique. Don't think you know.

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Speaker 1: You the Impossible Life Podcast and you're.

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Speaker 2: Sitting on a winning lottery.

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Speaker 3: Second, an idea that is fully formed, fully understood, that sticks.

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This is the Impossible Life Podcast because Nick and I

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are attempting to live impossible lives. What we know is

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that nothing is impossible. So instead of using impossible as

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an excuse to not try, we'll use the pursuit of

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impossible as an ex celerant for greatness. If something's never

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been done before, that just means it's unexplored. If they

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tell you it's too hard, it's just waiting to be simplified.

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Impossible as a default label used by uncourageous people unwilling

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to take a risk. The real truth is this the

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solution to any impossible task starts with this question, if

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I had to, what would it take?

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Speaker 1: Would it take?

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Speaker 2: Yes, it's going to very good. All right.

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Speaker 1: So the first one, unsurprisingly, Pops, is consistency. It's the

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three things that make a great father. Number one consistency.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. So, and it's the easiest but the hardest. Right. So,

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what I always say about consistency is just show up.

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Just keep showing up, and then show up, and you'll

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become consistent. It's not rocket Consistency is not rocket science.

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So if you base that around bad habits, of course

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you're going to be a bad person. But I chose

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to be consistent in things that I thought really mattered

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in life. Right, So one of those we already talked

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about just a minute ago. We decided we were consistently

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going to show up at church. So we did. Now,

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I can't tell you that all the messages I heard

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were positive and the outcome was great, or the worship

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was always so perfect or whatever, But what it did

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is it embedded into my children that that was important

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to mom and dad.

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Speaker 4: Right.

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Speaker 3: Really, really is the takeaway when he talks about the

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season where we went through a church split. We started

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going to a different church. I don't remember that church

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at all. I remember the effort and the hustle of

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having to go to a different church. My from like

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before before Elevate Life, which wasn't always called Elevate Life,

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it was called Celebration Covenant. But before the year two thousand,

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my memories of church was that my family went to church.

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That's my memory of church. I don't have a lot

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like from before ten years old. I don't really have.

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There's like a couple of pictures in my mind, a

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couple of flats of church. It must not have been

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that great, right, but I remember we went to church.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, And that really is how kids sum up their childhood, right,

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It's like these one or two sentences, like, dude, that

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was years of intentionality.

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Speaker 2: And so I can't tell you we were perfect, that

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every experience was a great experience. But I was consistent,

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So that created a going to church for me was

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one of my grounding consistencies. Right. I've already mentioned reading

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the Bible. I can't tell you that I always enjoyed it.

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I enjoy it now.

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Speaker 1: I'm into it, right, you know, I like I've seen

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your Bible.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, but I can't tell you it was

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always that way, but I saw my dad become I

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am now like my father when it comes to reading

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the Bible, and I when I sometimes I wake up

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in the morning when I have a cup of coffee

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and I'm early because I wake up around four thirty

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to five every morning, and that's what I do. And

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I think, oh, I'm like my father. That's what he did, right,

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And so.

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Speaker 3: His favorite devotional was Oswald Chambers my Ulmost first Highest.

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That's why that's where I first got it from.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and so so you just become consistent and things

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that are obvious, right, it's good choices, right, Okay, you

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should be consistent and not drinking and driving. That's like

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a no brainer, right. There's lots of those that are

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just no brainer things that you can do in life.

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I probably shouldn't yell at my wife, that would makes sense.

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Probably shouldn't hurt my children. I mean, and I could

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give you a list of one hundred just like simple things.

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But just be consistent in them. What's crazy about me

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with when I see guys come in and out, they'll

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come in, they'll get enlightened, right, they meet Jesus or

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they've been through a hard time. Most people come to

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the Lord if it's not as a youth. The statistics

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say that if you're not saved by the time you're eighteenth,

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there's a very good chance you're not going to get saved.

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And it only usually happens when you go through tragedy, right, divorce,

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loss of a job, loss of a parent, loss of

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a family, any some sort of crisis, sickness, cancer, whatever,

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and they come to the Lords. Well, so we see

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guys show up and they have some form of enlightenment,

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but the consistency piece is not there and they just can't.

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I just tell them all the time you've heard me

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say it, probably one hundred times. Just show up. Yeah,

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just keep coming and if you'll do it over time,

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then it becomes ingrained in who you are. There's some

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sort of statistics. You guys probably know what they are.

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If you do something for so many times, like if

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you do something twenty two times, I think is the measure. Yeah,

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that all of a sudden it's now a habit.

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Speaker 1: We're not big believers in that, because Garrett blew that

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one up and was like, if you do heroin once,

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that can become a habit, and I was like.

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Speaker 2: Instantly, yeah, that's good. So whatever the statistics are. But

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my point there, it is a truism that if you

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do think consistently over time, it becomes normal for you.

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Speaker 3: Well, consistency, I'm going to put two scriptures together. Consistency

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really is one of the ultimate qualities of manliness. In

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my opinion, it's Proverbs twenty four. If you fail in

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the day of adversity, your strength is weak.

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Speaker 2: Okay.

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Speaker 3: What Pops is kindly pointing out is like, hey, I

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see these guys come in, they get all hot, go

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through one tough season.

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Speaker 2: They're out.

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Speaker 3: What did they do? It got hard? They failed in

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the day of adversity. If you fail in the day

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of adversity, your strength is weak. Strength is important. What

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is the men of men in the Bible? King David, right,

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the man who is a man after God's own heart,

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ultimate champion, killed Goliath. It's who everybody you know you

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want to be number one, You should be most like Jesus.

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Number two, You should be like David. What is David's

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dying wisdom? First kings David's dying wisdom to his son son,

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be strong, act like a man. Right, So you've got

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to have strength. And that's what strength. Strength be a

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lot of being a man. You should have some strength.

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And what is that strength. It's consistency. It's not how

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much can you lift when it's easy, it's how much

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can you lift when it matters.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, And as I say so, the word that comes

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out of that, or this spiritual word or the church

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word that comes out of it, it's faithful. Right. My

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children said I was faithful. I'm just consistent and I

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made that decision a long time ago that this is

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what I'm going to do. And all I can tell

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you is it just works. A farmer is consistent. They

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do the same set of things. There's nothing new. They

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plow the field, they make sure there's no weeds in it.

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They put the seeds in the ground. They hope that

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it rains. Or if you have an irrigation system like

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they do nowadays, they water. The plants come up. If

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we don't have a hailstorm, we harvest the reward of

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what we do. It's that same way in life. If

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you'll just be consistent in what you do, the harvest

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will come up. It's almost immutable. Consistency is it's a

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very powerful thing, and then that becomes what people see

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as faithful. And if you're faithful, then that creates respect.

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Speaker 1: And you And that's a reflection of having high standard,

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as I would say, because and the reason I say

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that is because the guys who are hot. And I

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would also point to the parable of the of the

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sower when he's talking about the different soils, right, because

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the first soil gets snatched away by birds, and we

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know later Jesus explains that the devil that takes it

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before they can even receive it. The second one, what happens,

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They receive enjoy, but because there's no root, when things

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get hard, they find away. The third one is they

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start to they start to grow, but they of the

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cares of this world choke them out. And then the

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fourth one, and if you read, I think it's in

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the loop version. He says, through perseverance they produce thirty

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sixty one hundredfold. What you're saying is is good and godly,

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is what Jesus was saying. And so when guys come've never.

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Speaker 2: It work without perseverance. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Ever, I love this place so much, Pops, I'm gonna

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be here for I'm gonna be here forever, just like you.

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What do you say, Well, see every time, And that's

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what I mean about having high standards, because it's that's

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that's like you said, that's the part of having emotional control.

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That if you're somebody who's maybe a little bit more excitable,

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you might read that and be like, wow, that was

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pretty harsh. It's like, no, it's it's and it.

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Speaker 3: Really really is the lesson of well, we'll see, it's

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the lesson of consistency because you can give up on

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consistency at any point. Yeah, I've got to say, pops,

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I've been here for ten years. I told you I

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was gonna make it, well great, what's after that? Well,

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my family, you know, I'm going to raise up my

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kids in this. We'll see, because at any point you

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can stop doing what you're supposed to be doing.

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Speaker 2: And it's I saw.

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Speaker 3: You hovering over the button, so I'll say it to

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say it. It's what it's what strength is. Strength isn't

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what you can put pick up. It's what you never

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have to put down. And that's really what it is.

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Speaker 2: As a man.

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Speaker 3: It's deciding I'm never going to put down being a

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great father. I'm never going to put put down being

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a man who follows after God. I'm never going to

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put down being a good husband. It's consistency. What are

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the things you're always.

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Speaker 2: Going to do?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I love that.

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Speaker 2: It doesn't mean you're not going to stumble and fail.

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I mean talking about Pike's peak. I got because of

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the altitude I got, I got dizzy, and you're all dizzy.

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Well that's where.

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Speaker 3: Everyone thinks, like man, and like that's your dad.

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Speaker 2: Your dad's in his sixties.

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Speaker 3: I'm like, hey, man, when I'm in my sixties, I

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hope no one's.

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Speaker 2: Soft on me.

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Speaker 3: Everyone needs a good kick in the nuts every.

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Speaker 2: Once in a while. I wasn't. That's what we're all

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out here for. Like, I wasn't expecting to be soft

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on me, as you know, and I didn't. I didn't

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take offense to complain. But what I said was I'm

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going as fast as I can go. Yeah, because I

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was going and be safe. I didn't have the expectation

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that you would be the fastest, right, and you weren't,

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so you know, but it's it's just like life though,

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so you think you're never going to be dizzy. I'm

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almost killed myself on a car wreck in twenty eighteen. Yeah,

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I mean, was that on the plan? No have I

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went through a series of ridiculously hard things to just

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be back to my normal self. Now, Yeah, it's just live.

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Speaker 3: Don't let don't I recommend not pulling out in front

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of an eighteen wheeler.

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Speaker 2: Don't do it.

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Speaker 1: That's another thing for consistency.

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Speaker 3: Hey, don't pull in front eighteen don't get t boned

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at eighty miles an hour.

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Speaker 2: Don't do that.

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Speaker 1: Thank god you're here.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but you got you get my point. My point

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is is if there's if there's a takeaway from consistency,

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is you're gonna experien It's hard times. It's just part

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of it. Just don't quit, stay in the game. If

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you do, your kids will love you, respect you, and

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they'll know, hey, dad went through a hard time. I

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went through a hard time, but this is what they did,

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and that now you've set a course from when your

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kids go through hard times, which both of my kids

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went through hard times. We're not going to talk about

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that today. That's another podcast. But they didn't quit. They

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knew to do what show up? Stay in the game.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I think that's the micro is that you're just

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like all I got to do is just show up today.

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The macros that you realize the story you're writing, because

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you're like, what are my kids gonna do? They're gonna

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do what they saw you doing. And if you have

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a realization that you're writing a story, that's what Dren

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and I would call zoom in zoom out right. So

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the zoom in is, dude, you just got a hard dog.

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It just show up today. The zoom out is like,

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you're writing a story right now, and if you decide

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to quit, you're not gonna like the story exactly, and

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or the repercussions that you're handing down to the people

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you love.

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Speaker 3: So going on from consistency and one of other things,

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it's gone to the second point here. One of the

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things that I've seen my dad be a great model,

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built it for me, and you've heard me. You know,

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people look at me for this or like, oh, Youngartts

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didn't have any feelings I do. You know, Pops will

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tell you when I was young, I was a hot

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head totally.

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Speaker 2: I was a total I was a total hot head

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as a kid.

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Speaker 3: I would lose it.

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Speaker 2: I'd get so mad.

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Speaker 1: Just last month, you felt an emotion.

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Speaker 2: You told me that's when I would say, you've heard

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him say, I so wish I had a video camera

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and show you this later, Elijah, He wouldn't you have

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a video care You would say that when I was

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doing some things, but most of the time when he

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was saying that, it was I was just totally losing

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my cool.

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Speaker 1: You're like red mist and just send it. Yeah, all right.

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So the number two is emotional control. So you know

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that's easy for you. You're natural. I'm not like that because

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there are different temperaments. So what would you say to

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that guy?

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Speaker 2: So when I was a teenager, I fought a lot,

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and so why why would you fight because you don't

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have emotional control? Right now, I guys that under the

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thought that I was just beating up the bullies, right,

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whatever my excuse was, but it was just bad self control,

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right right. And so you guys know this, and some

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of the listeners probably know because you guys have mentioned

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I'm a golfer, right My best quality on the golf

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course is I don't ever lose them.

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Speaker 3: The last place I tamed my emotions was the golf course.

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Speaker 2: And I don't I don't lose emotional control on the golf.

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Speaker 1: Course, ever, I'll just you because because the commentary, especially

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if you're with a good golfer man, I love it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and but that when I was in high school,

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I didn't have that control. Yeah, And so it's a

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learned skill and it's just something I saw. I had

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a couple of friends that were total anger mania.

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Speaker 3: If I hadn't had my dad playing most of golf

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with me, if I like, if I didn't have a dad,

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I would, I bet you in my teenage years, I

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would have broken like dozens of golf class The fact

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that I never broke a golf club was only because

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my dad was there and he to whoop me if

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I broke it.

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Speaker 2: I would have sure probably with the golf club. But

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my point is is is it's probably the most attractive

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thing a man can have in his life.

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Speaker 3: My wife would tell you, unprovokable.

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Speaker 2: One of the things that was attractive to her with

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me was my temperament because I just I just don't.

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I mean, listen, I have blood coming out of the

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corner of my mouth sometimes, and I still after forty

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two years of marriage, there's times I'm like to give

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the advice i'd give other just let it circle if

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it doesn't sound good, just don't say it.

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Speaker 1: I'm glad you gave that advice, because that is a

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popsicism right there.

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Speaker 2: Let's circle And if it didn't sound good the first time,

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one more time and it just don't say it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and I can review it in your mind.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. I said something today to Darlene that I shouldn't

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have said, and she reminded me that I shouldn't have

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said it, but I did good like that didn't let

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it circle, but it was. I didn't need to say it.

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It was just wasted.

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Speaker 3: It's the voice of anger that says, like, you got

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to say this right now because let it circle is. Look, hey,

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if this really needs to be said, you can also

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see it later.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's not going to hurt you to say it

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thirty seconds from.

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Speaker 2: Now, but it doesn't. Only the value of controlling your

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emotions is not just with your spouse. It's amazing what

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it is with your kids and how you teach them

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not to be out of come. My kids say I

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never yelled at them, but it's not true. I did

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raise my voice at him, But yelling at him and

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raising my voices two different things, correct, And I didn't

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never lose control. I would I would this little cheat

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code on discipline. I would send them to their room

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and I would go to my room so I could

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calm down. I did not want to discipline my children

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out of anger, so I would go in and get

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They knew I was going to get the belt, but

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what I was really doing was calming down. So when

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I walked in the room, we discussed why they were

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getting discipline. It was never action, and they understood what

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they were getting disciplined for. And we did that and

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then we prayed together, and let's don't do that again.

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Speaker 3: It takes a different level of strength as a parent

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to do that type of discipline as well, because a

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lot of parents, as soon as they're not emotionally hot anymore,

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they don't have the strength of character to discipline their

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children are exactly because the kids saying I'm sorry, I

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didn't mean it, and they're like, oh, that's okay. Well,

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it takes a lot of strength of character when you're

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not emotionally hot anymore to follow through with the discipline.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Now, I want to encourage people about that because I

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will say my equanimity has grown tremendously since I've been

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in the environment that I'm in around you guys. Truthfully,

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it has and so my kids are growing up with

365
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the story because I just tell them all the time.

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I'm like, you will never see me lose my control,

367
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like lose my temper with you guys. You can ask

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my kids next time you're seeing has dad or lost

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this distemperate? They'll all tell you no, not because I've

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brainwashed them, but because it's true, because I backed it up.

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Speaker 2: It's a choice. It is a choice.

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Speaker 3: And even if it's not at your kids, if you're like,

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for example, if I had watched my dad mad and

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break a golf club, what would that have taught me?

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Speaker 2: Exactly?

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Speaker 1: But this is where but this is where I think

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the simple mapping in your mind is so important because

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up until I came to this environment, you know, you're

379
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around all sorts of types. Oh, this guy's got anger problems. Yeah,

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you wouldn't like when he's angry, and it's kind of

381
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like it's a good thing. It wasn't until I came

382
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into this environment. And because awareness proceeds change. So the

383
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first thing is you've got to be aware of what

384
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emotional stature and a lot of people are flying off

385
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the handle and someone's like, why are you so mad?

386
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I'm not mad, bro, you're mad? Okay, Like, go look

387
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in the mirror. So first you have to be aware.

388
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But the second thing is you have to start thinking

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how negative Like if you think being angry is normal

390
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or it's even a good thing, why would you stop it?

391
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Speaker 4: Right?

392
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Speaker 2: So, like, what do I have?

393
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Speaker 1: I have your voice in my head, Pops, I can

394
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hear it. No, you don't need to say it weak.

395
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That's weak.

396
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Speaker 2: It's weak. That's weak.

397
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Speaker 1: So as soon as I hear that, I'm like, I

398
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don't want to be that way. And so it was

399
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just mapping those things was a real like that was

400
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the starting point for me.

401
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Speaker 3: We have other episodes on this and it's you know, Nick,

402
00:17:55,359 --> 00:17:57,599
we can flag it for tools and tactics to come

403
00:17:57,640 --> 00:18:02,000
back to. Yeah, but really to emotional control, it's first

404
00:18:02,000 --> 00:18:03,240
you have to want it. You have to see the

405
00:18:03,319 --> 00:18:05,559
value of it. The same way like, what is fear

406
00:18:05,680 --> 00:18:08,960
robbing me of that's one of the keys to overcoming fear. Well,

407
00:18:08,960 --> 00:18:11,640
what is a lack of emotional control robbing it of

408
00:18:11,759 --> 00:18:15,279
your life? Then it's understanding, Hey, well there's tools, right,

409
00:18:15,359 --> 00:18:18,680
Like I can just learn how to think the right thoughts.

410
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It is breath work, Like, hey, I can I teach

411
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it to my kids, Like, okay, we need to take.

412
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Speaker 2: Big, big, deep breaths right now. Right.

413
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Speaker 3: You can talk yourself out of be an angry, same

414
00:18:27,880 --> 00:18:30,480
way you can talk yourself into it. But if you'll

415
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just decide, like I want to be this way, see

416
00:18:33,240 --> 00:18:36,119
the value of being this way, understand all the strength

417
00:18:36,440 --> 00:18:39,400
that's on the other side of having emotional control, and

418
00:18:39,480 --> 00:18:41,799
really like put that great value on it, then.

419
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Speaker 2: You'll have it.

420
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Speaker 3: Until you do that, you know, it'll sound like a

421
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good idea and the same way like people, So I'd

422
00:18:47,680 --> 00:18:49,359
love to be in shape, but until you put some

423
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value around it, you're gonna fall to every temptation. Yeah.

424
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Speaker 2: So there's plenty of scriptural basis. I mean, you know,

425
00:18:58,599 --> 00:19:00,319
you just you could you could just look about how

426
00:19:00,359 --> 00:19:03,480
almost any story in the Bible, right, you know. I

427
00:19:03,480 --> 00:19:06,839
mean David had great equanimity. He could have killed Saul

428
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multiple times, and his guys were saying do it.

429
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Speaker 1: Yeah, God's given them to you language yeah.

430
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Speaker 2: And he's like, I'm not doing it.

431
00:19:15,119 --> 00:19:17,079
Speaker 3: Or when the guys are throwing rocks at his head

432
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and his bro's like, let me kill that guy. You

433
00:19:19,480 --> 00:19:20,200
should kill that guy.

434
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Speaker 2: And if you won't kill him, ye, let me kill.

435
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Speaker 1: Kill yeah, and he said no.

436
00:19:23,880 --> 00:19:27,440
Speaker 2: Yeah. So it just there's nothing positive comes out of

437
00:19:27,519 --> 00:19:31,319
being out of control emotionally. And you've heard Garrett talk

438
00:19:31,400 --> 00:19:35,200
about when you're in conflict, the guy that loses his

439
00:19:35,279 --> 00:19:39,119
temper never wins. It's just predictable.

440
00:19:39,599 --> 00:19:42,000
Speaker 1: Garrett did say that. I said, I've lost a lot.

441
00:19:42,279 --> 00:19:43,839
I've been in a lot of fights. I've lost some

442
00:19:44,160 --> 00:19:45,160
never lost to an angry man.

443
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Speaker 2: What you're gonna do?

444
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Speaker 1: Exactly what he said, exactly, I'll never forget. When you

445
00:19:47,960 --> 00:19:50,039
said that, I was like, interesting, yeah.

446
00:19:49,839 --> 00:19:52,079
Speaker 2: And so it's that way you can apply that across

447
00:19:52,119 --> 00:19:54,680
the board. The main the main thing is is what

448
00:19:54,680 --> 00:19:56,839
what do you want your kids to remember about you?

449
00:19:56,839 --> 00:19:59,000
You're a hot head? Were you out of control? Or

450
00:19:59,079 --> 00:20:01,799
did you were? You're loving father and I and it

451
00:20:01,920 --> 00:20:05,720
bothered me if I was ever, you know, out of control.

452
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Speaker 3: And I won't say it who he was, but one

453
00:20:07,880 --> 00:20:09,839
of my dad's friends grown up. I remember growing up

454
00:20:09,839 --> 00:20:12,599
with him. I watched him throw golf clubs into the lake.

455
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Speaker 2: Yeah.

456
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Speaker 3: My dad would say, well, think about think about what

457
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every man wants.

458
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Speaker 1: He did go to prison, Oh oh, Wow, that's not

459
00:20:24,839 --> 00:20:26,880
for throwing golf clubs in. But you lose your temper

460
00:20:26,920 --> 00:20:28,759
on a golf course, you're probably losing in other places.

461
00:20:28,920 --> 00:20:31,559
But think about what every man wants. They want respect, right,

462
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You want to be respected by your wife and your kids.

463
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What was the first thing that your daughter said about you?

464
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She said that you were consistent and that you never

465
00:20:37,640 --> 00:20:40,680
lost your temper, and she put it herself, breeds respect. Yeah,

466
00:20:41,480 --> 00:20:43,480
I mean it's it's it really is that.

467
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Speaker 2: Simple, simple, simple, not easy. They stacked together. Consistency goes

468
00:20:49,000 --> 00:20:52,319
along with equanimity. So if you can be consistent about anything,

469
00:20:52,720 --> 00:20:55,400
you can get peace. Consistent if you don't have peace

470
00:20:55,400 --> 00:20:59,240
in your life. It's take exam just one quick example.

471
00:20:59,279 --> 00:21:01,519
We'll move to the next time. If you're going if

472
00:21:01,519 --> 00:21:04,599
you're driving down the toll way or in Dallas and

473
00:21:04,640 --> 00:21:07,200
you're in traffic, you have a choice. Before you leave

474
00:21:07,240 --> 00:21:08,799
your house. I'm going to get there with a smile

475
00:21:08,839 --> 00:21:10,920
on my face. I'm going to be a complete train wreck,

476
00:21:11,119 --> 00:21:13,599
right because people do not know how to drive. I

477
00:21:13,640 --> 00:21:15,160
mean I watch them have res in front of me.

478
00:21:15,200 --> 00:21:18,400
I watch people cut in front of me. I've determined

479
00:21:18,440 --> 00:21:22,240
to drive slower and enjoy the ride and not be

480
00:21:22,440 --> 00:21:24,400
messed up about it. Matter of fact, I respect guys

481
00:21:24,440 --> 00:21:26,480
that come blowing up to the stoplight and make the

482
00:21:26,480 --> 00:21:27,599
corner in front of me and get.

483
00:21:27,480 --> 00:21:28,839
Speaker 1: In front of that's your son.

484
00:21:28,880 --> 00:21:30,519
Speaker 2: That's why, Yeah, your job.

485
00:21:30,680 --> 00:21:34,240
Speaker 3: I do drive fast and aggressive. But if you're going

486
00:21:34,319 --> 00:21:36,480
to do I do it with a very positive attitude,

487
00:21:36,599 --> 00:21:40,720
not like angry or upset. You pair those things together

488
00:21:40,839 --> 00:21:44,039
and you become not only a dangerous driver, but a

489
00:21:44,119 --> 00:21:48,519
very impaired driver. Right, You're like, being angry is like

490
00:21:48,599 --> 00:21:51,400
being drunk. It is the light like there's you know,

491
00:21:51,880 --> 00:21:56,640
biological alcoholic sobriety, and there's emotional sobriety. You driving, you're

492
00:21:56,680 --> 00:21:59,759
driving fast and driving angry is a recipe for it

493
00:21:59,799 --> 00:22:01,240
is as you.

494
00:22:01,200 --> 00:22:01,880
Speaker 2: Can't control it.

495
00:22:03,160 --> 00:22:05,759
Speaker 1: And side note, Garrett's been trained in how to drive

496
00:22:05,799 --> 00:22:08,200
that way. So like my this is my wife, who doesn't,

497
00:22:08,319 --> 00:22:11,480
you know, give anybody comments for no reason. She's she's positive,

498
00:22:11,480 --> 00:22:13,599
but she's not gonna say she said. The difference when

499
00:22:13,640 --> 00:22:15,359
we drive with Garrett and other people is that I

500
00:22:15,440 --> 00:22:18,359
never feel unsafe when Garrett's doing it because you've driven

501
00:22:18,440 --> 00:22:20,599
us fast. We've been late for dinner before, and you've

502
00:22:20,640 --> 00:22:22,799
made up time. Shall we say, and she that was

503
00:22:22,839 --> 00:22:25,559
her quotment. She's like, I never feel unsafe. So I mean, like,

504
00:22:25,680 --> 00:22:27,319
I just want to have you out that for people like,

505
00:22:27,359 --> 00:22:29,519
well I have a pause latitude and Garrett from Posus

506
00:22:29,640 --> 00:22:30,640
that means I can go one hundred and ten.

507
00:22:30,720 --> 00:22:33,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, well you haven't had fifty thousand dollars for the drive.

508
00:22:33,920 --> 00:22:36,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, if you've been Special Forces trained on, Yeah, for

509
00:22:36,920 --> 00:22:40,039
a lot more than that by actual like motocross or

510
00:22:40,119 --> 00:22:43,720
what was what was the rally? Rally drivers and Baja

511
00:22:43,839 --> 00:22:46,440
drivers like come on? So anyways, all right, so pops,

512
00:22:46,480 --> 00:22:48,160
we got consistency, We got emotional control.

513
00:22:48,240 --> 00:22:50,400
Speaker 3: Third one is going to be last, last point. Wrap

514
00:22:50,480 --> 00:22:56,599
us up here, gonna be really easy. Deep sigh.

515
00:22:57,519 --> 00:23:01,160
Speaker 2: You know, well I want I want to kind of

516
00:23:01,160 --> 00:23:03,960
segue just for a second. Yeah, we've talked about a

517
00:23:04,000 --> 00:23:09,759
lot of what I would call tactics or are ways

518
00:23:09,839 --> 00:23:14,920
to be For me, the most important sub point, just

519
00:23:14,960 --> 00:23:18,160
to come back to it real quick, is it's who

520
00:23:18,200 --> 00:23:21,440
you are in Christ, right, So I just want to

521
00:23:21,839 --> 00:23:24,839
I want to lay that before we go to the

522
00:23:24,880 --> 00:23:29,680
final thing. I just want to lay that there's only

523
00:23:29,759 --> 00:23:34,039
one eternal mission, and as I've gotten older, I don't

524
00:23:34,039 --> 00:23:35,839
want to say, but I'm the old guy, and now

525
00:23:35,880 --> 00:23:39,400
I just think about legacy. But there's only one thing

526
00:23:39,440 --> 00:23:43,200
that matters, and it's what's on the other side. So

527
00:23:43,480 --> 00:23:46,559
we are we are in this life experiencing a very

528
00:23:46,599 --> 00:23:50,759
small picture of eternity. If we believe in Christ and

529
00:23:50,799 --> 00:23:52,960
then that God created the university, he sent a son

530
00:23:53,039 --> 00:23:54,880
for us, and that we're going to have eternal life

531
00:23:55,240 --> 00:23:58,599
which all goes together, then what we're experiencing here in

532
00:23:58,640 --> 00:24:02,920
this little window is just a picture or beginning of

533
00:24:02,960 --> 00:24:05,519
what attorney is going to be about. And I personally

534
00:24:05,519 --> 00:24:08,799
believe that all go together. I don't think God has

535
00:24:08,880 --> 00:24:14,559
us here training us. Yeah, going through the steps and

536
00:24:14,640 --> 00:24:19,799
not having an eternal correlation to that, now that's a

537
00:24:19,839 --> 00:24:23,200
big thought. But I just want everybody to hear my

538
00:24:23,240 --> 00:24:27,039
heart in that that serving hard after God and wanting

539
00:24:27,079 --> 00:24:31,079
to be the best for in that vein leads you

540
00:24:31,279 --> 00:24:35,160
to having steps of things that you should be in

541
00:24:35,240 --> 00:24:38,680
control of, right, And I know that's like a I

542
00:24:38,680 --> 00:24:41,279
don't know what the word I'm trying to say, but

543
00:24:42,079 --> 00:24:45,839
it's easy for us to lose sight of the goal.

544
00:24:46,559 --> 00:24:49,440
And we are created to create disciples. What you guys

545
00:24:49,519 --> 00:24:52,799
do at the impossible life as you help create disciples

546
00:24:53,119 --> 00:24:57,559
of Christ and whatever stage they're in. And so I

547
00:24:57,640 --> 00:24:59,759
just don't want to lose I don't want to lose

548
00:24:59,759 --> 00:25:03,279
folks in the midst of this great tactical discussion about

549
00:25:03,279 --> 00:25:06,279
being a good father. It really there's only one mission.

550
00:25:06,440 --> 00:25:08,319
Speaker 3: Yeah, well that that I mean, But that's a perfect

551
00:25:08,319 --> 00:25:12,720
setup for the final point of intentionality is intentionality comes

552
00:25:12,759 --> 00:25:15,680
from an understanding of what matters? Right, How how can

553
00:25:15,720 --> 00:25:18,200
you be intentional if you don't know what the real

554
00:25:18,240 --> 00:25:21,960
purpose of something is. Intentionality is the ability to It's

555
00:25:22,000 --> 00:25:24,920
like it's like focus, but focused with a purpose of

556
00:25:24,960 --> 00:25:27,319
looking past. Hey, that stuff doesn't matter us just have

557
00:25:27,640 --> 00:25:30,279
you know, fun is great, maybe what the restaurant is great,

558
00:25:30,319 --> 00:25:35,200
But we're we're here for a specific reason intentionality and family. Right,

559
00:25:35,240 --> 00:25:37,039
It's not like, well, I'm going to be intentional about

560
00:25:37,039 --> 00:25:38,720
making sure my kids have a good life. I'm going

561
00:25:38,759 --> 00:25:41,880
to be intentional about making sure that we enjoy being together. Now,

562
00:25:42,000 --> 00:25:45,640
let's be intentional about making sure that we're living kingdom lives.

563
00:25:46,079 --> 00:25:48,240
And if we can live lives on purpose for what

564
00:25:48,319 --> 00:25:51,160
really matters, then all the other good things like scripture

565
00:25:51,200 --> 00:25:55,240
promises are going to follow. And so, really, what you're saying,

566
00:25:55,319 --> 00:25:58,440
Pops is you don't. Don't think you have more time.

567
00:25:58,480 --> 00:26:01,880
It's one of the most foolish delusions that you can have. Hey,

568
00:26:01,920 --> 00:26:03,599
I got more time, got more time with my kids,

569
00:26:03,599 --> 00:26:05,599
got more time with my wife. Let me tell you

570
00:26:05,640 --> 00:26:07,920
the truth. The truth is you're out of time. You're

571
00:26:07,920 --> 00:26:10,240
out of time, like today is all that you have.

572
00:26:10,720 --> 00:26:13,680
Make today matter with your kids. Don't forget, you know,

573
00:26:13,880 --> 00:26:17,440
make this dinner that you're about to have, make it

574
00:26:17,480 --> 00:26:20,279
a dinner that matters. Pray with your kids. Speak life

575
00:26:20,319 --> 00:26:22,720
into your kids. Don't just read them a book. Pray

576
00:26:22,759 --> 00:26:25,039
over them before they go to bed. Make every day

577
00:26:25,319 --> 00:26:28,559
an opportunity to speak life. Speak wisdom into your kids

578
00:26:28,559 --> 00:26:29,440
because you're out of time.

579
00:26:29,640 --> 00:26:33,799
Speaker 2: Yeah so good. Yeah, it's very well said, son. And

580
00:26:34,680 --> 00:26:40,000
being intentional is when you look back. So I can

581
00:26:40,039 --> 00:26:42,440
look back at the things I did well right, and

582
00:26:43,519 --> 00:26:45,519
I can stack up some wins and say, okay, that

583
00:26:46,000 --> 00:26:49,440
was good. But Darlinge and I always had a picture

584
00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:53,759
with our kids because she came from a dysfunctional family. Also, okay,

585
00:26:53,799 --> 00:26:57,759
what is the what is the far range outcome that

586
00:26:57,799 --> 00:26:59,640
we want? And we gave that when we were together.

587
00:26:59,680 --> 00:27:01,759
You know, we wanted their kids to be good human beings,

588
00:27:01,799 --> 00:27:05,319
and we wanted, you know, our kids to choose Jesus

589
00:27:05,319 --> 00:27:07,759
on their own and we wanted them to choose us back.

590
00:27:08,200 --> 00:27:10,680
And that's that's a that's a wonderful goal to have

591
00:27:10,759 --> 00:27:13,880
as a family, and we're fortunate enough to have had that.

592
00:27:14,599 --> 00:27:18,079
But now I think about grandkids, right, So now we

593
00:27:18,119 --> 00:27:21,160
have number seven grandchild on the way, very exciting Garrett

594
00:27:21,200 --> 00:27:26,759
Junior's own way, And all I think about is, now, Okay,

595
00:27:26,759 --> 00:27:30,440
how can I affect them? How can I be intentional

596
00:27:30,519 --> 00:27:34,000
about what our life looks like, what those grandchildren are

597
00:27:34,039 --> 00:27:36,400
going to see? How are we going to train them

598
00:27:36,559 --> 00:27:39,720
where they get the same. So now we've multiplied, right,

599
00:27:39,839 --> 00:27:42,920
So it was too my Both of my children chose

600
00:27:43,079 --> 00:27:47,480
very wisely. They have great spouses, they're they're now family members.

601
00:27:47,519 --> 00:27:49,440
I don't look at them as a different They're part

602
00:27:49,440 --> 00:27:50,079
of our family.

603
00:27:50,319 --> 00:27:52,359
Speaker 3: Both required an appropriate level of training.

604
00:27:53,279 --> 00:27:55,400
Speaker 2: Yes we're not. That's a different podcast.

605
00:27:55,519 --> 00:27:56,839
Speaker 1: Yeah, I love both of them.

606
00:27:56,880 --> 00:27:58,160
Speaker 2: So that's actually very funny, but.

607
00:27:58,559 --> 00:28:01,559
Speaker 3: It is true, and some training continues, you'll get to

608
00:28:01,559 --> 00:28:03,400
be in this family circle just as you are.

609
00:28:03,920 --> 00:28:06,039
Speaker 2: We what we say, how do you say it? We're

610
00:28:06,039 --> 00:28:08,759
going to always talk about the things that we always

611
00:28:08,759 --> 00:28:11,920
talk about and talk about and in our family, Pastor

612
00:28:11,960 --> 00:28:13,960
Case says that, and in our family it's that way

613
00:28:14,000 --> 00:28:16,559
when we have we are talking about the same things

614
00:28:16,599 --> 00:28:19,400
over and over again. We're very intentional about that, and

615
00:28:19,440 --> 00:28:23,000
so we're creating. We're creating an intentionality that that will

616
00:28:23,039 --> 00:28:28,000
bleed naturally into our grandchildren and they're going to follow

617
00:28:28,079 --> 00:28:31,200
what we do. And so by being intentional, started with

618
00:28:31,319 --> 00:28:35,119
Darlene and I create We created it with consistency, we

619
00:28:35,240 --> 00:28:37,799
created it with with equanimity. Darlene has a lot of

620
00:28:37,799 --> 00:28:42,920
academia now, and then we're going to create it intentionally,

621
00:28:42,960 --> 00:28:46,160
created with our kids and in our grandkids. And by

622
00:28:46,240 --> 00:28:49,640
doing that, I tell people all the time, I'm the

623
00:28:49,720 --> 00:28:51,960
richest guy in the world. Yes, we've had some measure

624
00:28:52,000 --> 00:28:55,079
of success in life, but honestly, it's meaningless to me.

625
00:28:55,720 --> 00:28:58,599
What is valuable to me is this. What is value

626
00:28:58,640 --> 00:29:00,920
to me is our family. What is value to me

627
00:29:01,000 --> 00:29:04,359
is my grandchildren. And if you don't, if you just

628
00:29:04,400 --> 00:29:07,000
take it flippantly, life will just pass you by. My

629
00:29:07,079 --> 00:29:09,880
dad died at the age I am right now he does,

630
00:29:09,920 --> 00:29:12,160
so I'm planning on it. He was in good health

631
00:29:12,200 --> 00:29:15,319
as far as everybody knew. He had a rare, rare item,

632
00:29:15,359 --> 00:29:18,079
which is a brain aneurysm, which is usually comes from

633
00:29:18,079 --> 00:29:21,640
a birth defect, and he was gone the next day.

634
00:29:22,240 --> 00:29:24,759
So how do you plan for that? You do exactly

635
00:29:24,799 --> 00:29:26,319
what you said. You're out of time.

636
00:29:26,599 --> 00:29:30,279
Speaker 3: It's Pop says that all the time, like I'm the

637
00:29:30,279 --> 00:29:33,720
wealthiest man you know in the world, and that's not

638
00:29:34,039 --> 00:29:37,799
really it's not about money. The proverb says it. I

639
00:29:37,839 --> 00:29:42,200
think it's probably it's Proverbs twenty something. Money sprouts wings

640
00:29:42,200 --> 00:29:45,000
and flies away, right? Or is just people say, hey,

641
00:29:45,000 --> 00:29:47,519
money comes and money goes. But there are things that

642
00:29:47,559 --> 00:29:49,359
you can have in this world that do not sprout

643
00:29:49,359 --> 00:29:52,039
wings and fly When you have planted your children and

644
00:29:52,119 --> 00:29:54,279
the house of the Lord, that doesn't just sprout up

645
00:29:54,279 --> 00:29:57,640
and fly away. When you've spent a lifetime developing character,

646
00:29:57,759 --> 00:30:01,720
having consistency in your life, raising children, pouring into your spouse,

647
00:30:01,960 --> 00:30:04,400
when you've discipled one hundreds and thousands of people in

648
00:30:04,440 --> 00:30:06,799
your life, those things don't sprout up wings and fly away.

649
00:30:08,720 --> 00:30:10,000
Speaker 2: Thank you very much for listening.

650
00:30:10,039 --> 00:30:13,880
Speaker 4: Guys, remember to share, like subscribe. If you think that

651
00:30:13,960 --> 00:30:16,440
this would be something that someone would enjoy, please send

652
00:30:16,440 --> 00:30:18,440
it to them. We appreciate it all If you want

653
00:30:18,440 --> 00:30:20,680
to get in touch, you can follow us on Instagram

654
00:30:20,839 --> 00:30:23,559
at the Impossible Life. You'll find us on there. You

655
00:30:23,599 --> 00:30:27,839
can also email at Impossible Life Podcasts at gmail dot.

656
00:30:27,519 --> 00:30:28,880
Speaker 1: Com if you have any questions.

657
00:30:28,960 --> 00:30:30,400
Speaker 4: If you want to get in touch and find out

658
00:30:30,400 --> 00:30:33,079
about Carrot's personal or business coaching, that's the way to

659
00:30:33,119 --> 00:30:35,759
do it. Thank you again for listening. Go out there

660
00:30:36,000 --> 00:30:37,880
and think better and live the impossible.

661
00:30:37,920 --> 00:30:38,839
Speaker 3: You see again sooner