Speaker 1: Hey, hey, hey, I'm back with something for you to
Speaker 1: think about.
Speaker 2: Listen. I had to get on here and do this.
Speaker 1: Episode because you've heard me talk about how people are
Speaker 1: putting out bad information, in my opinion, bad information.
Speaker 2: And I am not sitting here saying I know everything.
Speaker 1: But I know people pretty well. I've learned people pretty well.
Speaker 1: I've studied people. I've observed people for most of my life,
Speaker 1: even before professionally. But I want to talk about something
Speaker 1: that I heard, and it came from a person who
Speaker 1: was a license something and I just disagree with what
Speaker 1: this person said. I just totally disagree with it.
Speaker 2: Somebody asked this person on a live.
Speaker 1: TV broadcast, why do I keep picking the same type
Speaker 1: of people? And the first thing the woman said was,
Speaker 1: I won't say that it's because of you.
Speaker 2: I'm not saying I won't say that you're not the problem.
Speaker 2: Well I will.
Speaker 1: I will both definitely say that you are the problem.
Speaker 1: Not sarcastic and you know, trying to be sarcastic, doing
Speaker 1: it in a sarcastic way, or belittling or poking, you know,
Speaker 1: poking the phone, none of that.
Speaker 2: I'm just being honest with you. Yes, you are the problem.
Speaker 1: The other person may be a part of the problem,
Speaker 1: but you are your own problem. So far a so
Speaker 1: called professional person to say, I don't want to say
Speaker 1: you're the problem. I don't want to say that, then
Speaker 1: she don't need to say anything at all, because you
Speaker 1: are the problem.
Speaker 2: If you keep picking the same types of people, you
Speaker 2: are the problem.
Speaker 1: Like I said, they may be a part of your
Speaker 1: problem as far as your problematic, problematic situation.
Speaker 2: But you are the one who's responsible and accountable for
Speaker 2: your life, not the other person.
Speaker 1: Because other people are gonna bring into your life what
Speaker 1: you set yourself up for, what you open yourself up to,
Speaker 1: and they're gonna treat you how you have taught them
Speaker 1: that they can treat you.
Speaker 2: Poor blank.
Speaker 1: I know. People try you. They try you to see
Speaker 1: how far they can go with you. They try to
Speaker 1: see how you know what you.
Speaker 2: Will or what you wan't allow. People gonna try you.
Speaker 1: But still yet, it is your responsibility, team yours, no
Speaker 1: one else's as to what you allow someone to do
Speaker 1: to you.
Speaker 2: It's your responsibility.
Speaker 1: You're accountable for your life.
Speaker 2: So yes, you are the problem.
Speaker 1: Your mindset is your very worst enemy.
Speaker 2: I'm just really a part that a so called.
Speaker 1: Professional saying I won't say that you're the problem. See,
Speaker 1: it goes to show you that societies all around the
Speaker 1: world are so caught up on credentials and license and
Speaker 1: all of those things because they think it makes a
Speaker 1: person so much more knowledgeable.
Speaker 2: No, people are knowledgeable in that area.
Speaker 1: It does not mean they know everything about everything because
Speaker 1: they don't.
Speaker 2: I don't know one does. And people.
Speaker 1: Put so much credibility behind credentials. People pay for credentials,
Speaker 1: people pay for other people to do their work.
Speaker 2: I mean people can become certified in all of that
Speaker 2: many different ways.
Speaker 1: It does not mean that a person really knows the
Speaker 1: subject that they study. Many people buy degrees on mind.
Speaker 1: Many people let someone else do that work. I know
Speaker 1: it for a fact, an absolute, one hundred percent fact.
Speaker 1: But society is so caught up in credentials when they
Speaker 1: want to be when they want to be because we
Speaker 1: know it's all the farce.
Speaker 2: It's all the farce from the top, hint hints down,
Speaker 2: it's all a farce. So you are the problem.
Speaker 1: People will come into your life.
Speaker 2: I don't care who they are. It could be your
Speaker 2: friend's family, it.
Speaker 1: Could be your own children, it could be your parents,
Speaker 1: your significant others.
Speaker 2: I don't care who it is.
Speaker 1: They will treat you how you have allowed They will
Speaker 1: treat you how you have taught them to treat you.
Speaker 1: And if it's any way other than treating you, well,
Speaker 1: you created that monster because you allowed it. You keep
Speaker 1: picking the same people because you have not chosen to change.
Speaker 1: Simple as that, you have not chosen to change, and
Speaker 1: therefore you pick similar people and you go through similar
Speaker 1: things because you have not allowed healing to take place
Speaker 1: in your life.
Speaker 2: As simple as that.
Speaker 1: Most people in the world that you run across or
Speaker 1: you meet, they think they have it together.
Speaker 2: They think they're okay.
Speaker 1: They don't know their word, they don't love themselves, but
Speaker 1: they think they're okay. If you don't know yourself, if
Speaker 1: you don't love yourself, you don't.
Speaker 2: Even know what's good for you.
Speaker 1: You don't even know what you need because you're just
Speaker 1: seeking and chasing and reaching, trying to find this and
Speaker 1: that to fill the void inside of you.
Speaker 2: But it never wants it never works out.
Speaker 1: Because people get everything other than what they are seeking
Speaker 1: or what they actually need. They get everything other than
Speaker 1: that because what happens is you become entangled with similar people,
Speaker 1: meaning people with the same mindset that you have. But
Speaker 1: the difference is when there are two people who both
Speaker 1: are broken people, they don't.
Speaker 2: Recognize the brokenness. He don't recognize recognize it in her.
Speaker 1: She don't recognize it in him because they think what
Speaker 1: they have is love. You can talk to them until
Speaker 1: you pass out.
Speaker 2: You will not change their minds.
Speaker 1: They have to go through something devastating, something that is
Speaker 1: so triggering it causes them to want to change.
Speaker 2: That's the only way it's gonna happen.
Speaker 1: People point the finger because they constantly get into these
Speaker 1: relationships that fail, constantly repeating the same cycles, and then
Speaker 1: they point the finger at the people they were in
Speaker 1: the relationships with and they blame them. They have everything
Speaker 1: in the world to say about those individuals they were
Speaker 1: in relationships with when they failed to look at the
Speaker 1: many fingers pointing back itself. I've told you before, we
Speaker 1: have more pointing back at ourselves. For a reason, God
Speaker 1: knew what he was doing when he created us. You
Speaker 1: have to work on that inner man, that inner woman
Speaker 1: that's inside of you, that part of you that devastates
Speaker 1: your life and cause dysfunction that you can't see, you feel.
Speaker 2: The effects of it. But you can't see it.
Speaker 1: We can see how it causes you issues in your life,
Speaker 1: but we can't see the actual dysfunction because cause it
Speaker 1: comes from within, we just see the behaviors, the actions.
Speaker 2: You have to do that inside work. That's why you
Speaker 2: have more famish pointing back at yourself. So again I
Speaker 2: will say, yes, you are the problem.
Speaker 1: You're the reason you keep picking the same type of people.
Speaker 1: You're the reason. You are the reason. You're the reason,
Speaker 1: flat I mean, flat out, point blank the end, you're
Speaker 1: the reason. Nobody else is picking them for you. You're picking
Speaker 1: them for yourself because you have not allowed healing in
Speaker 1: your life. Therefore you have no mental maturity. You have
Speaker 1: gotten older, you have gone through things, you have accomplished things,
Speaker 1: or maybe not. But the bottom line, the point I'm
Speaker 1: trying to make is there has been no mental growth,
Speaker 1: no mental maturity.
Speaker 2: Many people get old, but they don't mature mentally.
Speaker 1: Therefore you see things the same way. Bad still looks
Speaker 1: good to you because you're looking through eyes that are
Speaker 1: wide shut. They're open, but you don't see anything because
Speaker 1: you're blind to the things that you want, your desires,
Speaker 1: your feelings.
Speaker 2: You're blind to those things. So you can't see reality
Speaker 2: as it truly is. You see what you want it
Speaker 2: to be. So although that individual have all.
Speaker 1: Of these flaws, all of this negativity, you can't see it.
Speaker 2: Because you're moving on what you want, how you feel,
Speaker 2: what you desire.
Speaker 1: And most times this is the real kicker, this is
Speaker 1: the real serious part that people don't understand. You get
Speaker 1: in a relationship based on how you feel. What I
Speaker 1: mean is you get in a relationship with someone and
Speaker 1: you move according to how you're feeling. That's why people
Speaker 1: who have like minds, they give you bits of nuggets
Speaker 1: and nibblets, just enough to keep you in a relationship.
Speaker 2: And what that does is it make you.
Speaker 1: Feel good for a moment and then you think everything
Speaker 1: is good until it's not again. So you are feeling
Speaker 1: these things, you're feeling these emotions.
Speaker 2: You're doing everything.
Speaker 1: You're trying to please and a peace, and no matter
Speaker 1: what you do, you're still struggling, you still hurt, you're still.
Speaker 2: Drained, you're still going through all.
Speaker 1: Of the same things you've always went through because you
Speaker 1: have not changed. There has been no improvement in your
Speaker 1: mental cognition, no change. So when there's no change, you're
Speaker 1: gonna do similar things or the same things with different people.
Speaker 2: Some of you.
Speaker 1: Even go back to the same person, thinking it's gonna
Speaker 1: be better than the second time around, when most times
Speaker 1: it's not, because not only you.
Speaker 2: Haven't changed, that other person haven't changed.
Speaker 1: They haven't changed either, but you still want them, You
Speaker 1: still behind and over them, and you see things the
Speaker 1: same way they say, Oh I've changed, and you want
Speaker 1: to believe them so much you let them back into
Speaker 1: your life. And if that's not the case, your particular case,
Speaker 1: but I know it's the case for many. You end
Speaker 1: up with someone else similar characteristics.
Speaker 2: Treat you the same similar way.
Speaker 1: You go through the same, similar situations because you are
Speaker 1: attracted to that negativity, even though you feel you don't
Speaker 1: want it.
Speaker 2: That's what you attract.
Speaker 1: And people will always do this until they choose change.
Speaker 1: You must allow healing inside us, deal with that inner man,
Speaker 1: that inner woman.
Speaker 2: You must heal. Let all of the jump go.
Speaker 1: Learn to love and know yourself, because you gotta love
Speaker 1: and know yourself first before you can understand what love
Speaker 1: is or what it is, and before you even know
Speaker 1: how to truly get to know that other person. When
Speaker 1: you're going off of your feelings, you want your desires.
Speaker 1: You're blind to everything else. You cannot see what you
Speaker 1: need to see.
Speaker 2: Because you're living by that superficial stuff.
Speaker 1: That means nothing when it comes to building a strong, loving, lasting,
Speaker 1: healthy relationship. Look, money, titles, possessions, none of that.
Speaker 2: None of it. It's going to help you.
Speaker 1: Build a strong love and lasting, healthy relationship, None of it.
Speaker 2: It's superficial.
Speaker 1: But when you have not mentally matured, you do not
Speaker 1: understand anything I'm saying.
Speaker 2: It makes no sense to you, But I challenge you,
Speaker 2: look at your life. Are you on the wheel?
Speaker 1: You know?
Speaker 2: You just go on in the circles.
Speaker 1: We live in the same similar things. It's not his fault,
Speaker 1: it's not her fault. It's your fault that you gravitate
Speaker 1: towards those types of people. You have to look at yourself.
Speaker 1: Why am I shoes in the same type of people.
Speaker 1: It's because your mindset haven't changed. You have not became
Speaker 1: better mentally. You have not matured mentally, but most people
Speaker 1: think they are. You cannot tell most people that they
Speaker 1: are not mature, or that they don't love themselves. They
Speaker 1: will not want to hear it, they will not believe it.
Speaker 1: For nothing in this world because most people think they're okay,
Speaker 1: And you know, it's just baffling to me, because how
Speaker 1: can anyone think they're okay when they're constantly struggling, they're
Speaker 1: constantly experiencing hurt and pain because of their significant others
Speaker 1: or other people in general.
Speaker 3: How can you think you're okay when you continue to
Speaker 3: go through the same things, You continue to be treated bad,
Speaker 3: you continue to be used and abused, you continue to
Speaker 3: be taken advantage of. How can you be okay?
Speaker 1: There's no way you can be, in no way in man,
Speaker 1: that inner woman needs healing.
Speaker 2: And the only way you can get to that.
Speaker 1: Point, that point of healing is by accepting that it
Speaker 1: needs to take place and then working on it. Because everyone,
Speaker 1: whether they understand it or not, or believe it or not,
Speaker 1: everyone knows why.
Speaker 2: They have the mindsets that they have.
Speaker 1: Because you know better than me, you know better than
Speaker 1: anyone else what you've gone through, all of that negativity
Speaker 1: you went through as a child or as an adult.
Speaker 1: Because everything may come from childhood. Some people just got
Speaker 1: off on the wrong path for whatever reason as they
Speaker 1: became adults, so.
Speaker 2: You can't blame everything on childhood.
Speaker 1: But the point I'm trying to make is wherever that
Speaker 1: negativity came from. You have to allow healing and to
Speaker 1: let it go because you're not in it anymore. It's
Speaker 1: the memories of it that people allowed to hold them back,
Speaker 1: that people allowed to cause them to.
Speaker 2: Be dysfunctional in the present moment.
Speaker 1: Some of you are still hurting, still carrying old pains
Speaker 1: from many, many, many years ago.
Speaker 2: Like I've said several times, some of the people who
Speaker 2: hurt you are dead and gone, and.
Speaker 1: You're still angry, you're still mad, you're still allowing it
Speaker 1: to make you believe you're not worthy and those people
Speaker 1: dead and gone.
Speaker 2: Problem.
Speaker 1: What people fail to understand that it's very serious, is
Speaker 1: the mindset that you have came from, or was formed
Speaker 1: from your negative experiences and the people that's been in
Speaker 1: your life, in your social circle, your environments.
Speaker 2: All that formed the mind that you have now now.
Speaker 1: But as an adult, it's your responsibility to choose better.
Speaker 2: But most people don't. They stay on the same negative paths.
Speaker 1: And when you stay on the same negative path, you're
Speaker 1: gonna get the same negative results, are similar results.
Speaker 2: That's just the way it is.
Speaker 1: No one on the face of the earth, and I
Speaker 1: mean no one on the face of the earth can
Speaker 1: be a better person by.
Speaker 2: Remain in the same It's not going to happen. It's
Speaker 2: not going to happen.
Speaker 1: So yes, yes, yes, yes, you are the problem because
Speaker 1: you're the one who pick and choose who you want
Speaker 1: to be with.
Speaker 2: You're the one who.
Speaker 1: Picks the decision as an adult, you're the one. They're
Speaker 1: not laid Get over here, you're gonna be in a
Speaker 1: relationship with me. No, you choose them because you see them.
Speaker 1: They look good to you, they're pretty to you. Oh
Speaker 1: you think they have money or they have money.
Speaker 2: You love you know what you see you.
Speaker 1: You you're you're admiring their tied on their position, and
Speaker 1: you just want to be close to that.
Speaker 2: Whatever drew you in. It's super superficial.
Speaker 1: It's superficial, and most people only realize when they're in
Speaker 1: such bad situations that good look, the money, the titles,
Speaker 1: the positions, the notoriety, none of it matters if none
Speaker 1: of it helps the relationship.
Speaker 2: So if you want things to be different, you have
Speaker 2: to choose differently. I mean, I've been there myself.
Speaker 1: Hey, at one point in my life, when I was
Speaker 1: much younger, I settled.
Speaker 2: But I tell you what. I will never settle again, ever, ever, ever, ever.
Speaker 2: I know my work.
Speaker 1: I am a gym hands down all around, and I
Speaker 1: will not settle.
Speaker 2: I would never require or.
Speaker 1: Look for something and someone that I don't possessing myself
Speaker 1: to me, that is just completely I mean, it's not
Speaker 1: a rational way to think, but most people think that way.
Speaker 1: Oh I want him to have this and have that
Speaker 1: when you have nothing, it don't make sense. People supposed
Speaker 1: to enhance your life, the people you choose to be
Speaker 1: were supposed to enhance your life.
Speaker 2: But you're supposed to enhance theirs too. So many people
Speaker 2: have nothing to bring to.
Speaker 1: The table, but they want everything from the table, irrational thoughts.
Speaker 2: Be cool or what you're looking for now?
Speaker 1: Like I said, plenty of times, sometimes it may mean
Speaker 1: yourself because people are in intimidated. They're intimidated by people
Speaker 1: who they see, who they see and think are strong individuals.
Speaker 1: They're intimidated by that. That's not your problem. You don't
Speaker 1: want anybody like that anyways. So in your times of
Speaker 1: being by yourself, those are the greatest times for you
Speaker 1: to become the best you possible, strong, knowing your word,
Speaker 1: loving yourself. But unfortunately, many people don't have that patience.
Speaker 1: They want want, want, and never get nothing, work anything.
Speaker 1: And I'm talking from the top down because brokenness do
Speaker 1: not care who you are. They don't care how pretty
Speaker 1: you are. They don't care how many houses.
Speaker 2: And cars you have. They don't care if you don't
Speaker 2: have a house or car. They don't care if you're
Speaker 2: in the highest position in the world. They don't care.
Speaker 1: Broken brokenness does not care, and it does not discriminate.
Speaker 2: Anyone with eyes I mean.
Speaker 1: Figuratively speaking, realize they can see un need I say more,
Speaker 1: need I say more. It's all around us, at our jobs, at.
Speaker 2: Church, in the clubs, I mean all types.
Speaker 4: Of clubs, like party clubs, clubs that people are a
Speaker 4: part of, in societies, I mean, in every aspect.
Speaker 2: Of life, brokenness, brokenness, brokenness.
Speaker 1: And that's why we see all of these run and
Speaker 1: a monk that we see amongst people, all of the division,
Speaker 1: all of the hatred. People are broken, but they don't
Speaker 1: understand their brokenness and they will never ever ever be
Speaker 1: better because they're looking to other people who are broken.
Speaker 2: Just like them. So you are the problem.
Speaker 1: I will stand and say it to your face if
Speaker 1: I had to. You are the problem. If you are
Speaker 1: going through those things, keep picking the same type of
Speaker 1: men or picking the same type of women.
Speaker 2: You're the problem.
Speaker 1: You're the one picking them.
Speaker 2: And if anyone is.
Speaker 1: Out there that want to talk about it, reach out
Speaker 1: to me my podcast page Think on It by.
Speaker 2: Cherry gives you mind email. I always respond. Now.
Speaker 1: I do get some weird emails sometimes, and I'm not
Speaker 1: sure a lot of people be asking me about being.
Speaker 2: On you know, some.
Speaker 1: Episodes with me, but I don't know these people, and
Speaker 1: I'm not sure if it's real or not.
Speaker 2: You know, people are so scamming these days. But I
Speaker 2: will respond to.
Speaker 1: You if you reach out with a question or you
Speaker 1: just want to talk, or like I said, I always
Speaker 1: offer prayer to people. If you need prayer, I'm more
Speaker 1: than willing to do that too. So thank you for listening.
Speaker 1: I'm leaving it right there. Please share this episode. Much
Speaker 1: love Newing to each and every one of you all
Speaker 1: around the world. I love you so much. I end
Speaker 1: every episode the same, and I hope.
Speaker 2: You do it. Thame Pardon