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Speaker 1: And I present to you my predictions of the twoenty

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twenty five Houston Texans hit the Music Ross matt Sunday,

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September the seventh, the Texans will be in Los Angeles

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take on the Rams. Angle actually in the Inglewood and

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ROSSI Matthew Stafford. I know he's staying in Los Angeles,

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but he only can throw at forty percent. His arm

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strength is significantly down, and Demante Adams is so old

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he'll be out there in a wheelchair. Christian Kirk is

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going to make his LA debut a success. Seven catches,

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eighty four yards in a touchdown. Wow. Texans beat the

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Rams twenty one to ten. Okay, Matthew Stafford throws multiple

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picks in the game that secondary are one oh. Monday Night,

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September fifteenth, the Liberty Wideout game. The Buccaneers are coming in.

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The Buccaneers don't ever play well in the first half

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of the season. They always get better, just like Baker

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Mayfield does. But guess what, The Texans will catch him

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at the right time. Will Anderson will sack Buddy Buddy

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uh Baker Mayfield three times in a twenty seven seventeen

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Texans went over the Buccaneers Okay two and zero Baby

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LFG Week three, Sunday, September twenty first, Texans go to

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Jacksonville for a noon game. The Jaguars don't even know

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where they're playing because they're hardly playing in Jacksonville anymore.

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They're always going overseas for one race or the other.

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They're lost. Trevor Lawrence gets a haircut before the game,

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really shaves his head. Uh no, it's a it's a

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cu cut if you will. Okay. He's obviously disjointed by that.

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He misses his free flowing locks. Wow. He actually tries

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to run for a first down and gives up the football.

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It is scooped up by here, give by Jalen Peatree

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runs to the head. Texans two defensive touchdowns. Win it.

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Twenty eight sixteen Okay three and zero. Sunday, September the

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twenty eighth. The Tennessee Titans are in Wow. The number

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one pick in this draft cam Ward not playing in

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the game. What happened? He gets concussed the week before?

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Oh man, So will levis He's still a Texa Titan? Right? Yeah?

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I think so. Thomas Sports Enterprises no longer bullish on him.

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Because tennant, because he will throw three amazing interceptions, one

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will be returned for a pickstick six by Derek Stingley.

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Kimy Febrin hits four field goals in the game, one

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of which is at least fifty five yards. These are

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wildly specific predictions. Well that's what I'm here for. Again.

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Nobody else in the marketplace is doing this, so I

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gotta do it. Texans beat the Titans thirty one eleven.

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It's really an odd score. They get a safety safety

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the bat safety o'clock. Then Sunday, October the fifth, we

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go week because of course, I'm of the two of

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the Texans in Baltimore gonna take on the ravens Lamar

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Jackson two costly fumbles, one in the red zone late

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as they try to drive. Texans hold on for Dear

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Life twenty six twenty three, Wow, in a rainstorm Bible set.

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It'll be raining in Baltimore pict weather as well. Yes,

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nobody in the marketplace is doing this. Monday, October the twentieth,

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the Texans get a week off. Fifteen days later they'll

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be going to Seattle to take on the Seahawks. Who's

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the Seahawks quarterback? Now Sam Darnold, Oh my god, he

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will be sacked five times. There will be the twelfth

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man up there, and we won't hear a pete from them.

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This will be the most dominant road victory for the

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Texans this season. The Seahawks may only score two field

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goals in the game. Meanwhile, a pair of right pushing

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touchdowns from who would be the who would be the

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backup to the backup of the backup? Uh? Oh, you

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know what, we'll give you to the Joe Mixon. Okay,

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Joe Mixon rushes for one hundred and fourteen yards and

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two touchdowns. That you're gonna go Darry ogunbow twenty seven

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to six. They beat Seattle. Eighty percent of the crowd

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leaves by the fourth quarter because it's too late. They

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gotta go to work the next day. Then, Sunday, October

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twenty sixth, the San Francisco Fort Anders are gonna air in.

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Who's their big expensive tight end, George Kittle? George Kittle?

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How many weeks are we in? Too many? We're gonna

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hurry here quickly. You know what. George Kittle cracks an

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ankle in the game. Oh my god. Jaxon's win by

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two scores. Finally, Denver Broncos are in town. Denver. Sean

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Payton is a grumpy the entire time. Really, yes, okay,

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I got Nicks. Bo Nix throws for Bow doesn't know football,

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both throws for one hundred and four teen yards and two.

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I n t'sow. Texans get another four field goal game

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from Kymie Fairbird. He's very busy this year. I think

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I've counted forty seven interceptions for the Texans defense. So

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it's going to be never one of the NFL. Texans

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win that one over the Denver Broncos. Who cares Jacksonville

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Jaguars at home? Easy ps win at Tennessee will be

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thirty five thousand people there, easy drunk one of having

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relations with their husband in the private suite at halftime.

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Really yeah, it's gonna be ugly and there'll be video

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of it. Very becoming of an NFL owner. Josh Allen

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hates playing in Buffalo in Houston. We saw that last year.

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If you'll repeat itself, Texans beat the Buffalo Bills, they

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will be at that point eleven and zero. It's the

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game so boring. Michael's falls asleep in the fourth quarter

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and he wants more pictures of himself during the course

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of the presentation. Then you go to Indianapolis, Texans. What

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are they doing Indianapolis? Every year they win, so history

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repeat itself there. That's got to be at least a

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two touchdown win. Sunday, December the seventh, primetime Sunday Night

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Football at Kansas City. It's a tough one. Not tough,

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are you kidding me? The Texans playing in Kansas City.

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First halfs they will not blow a twenty three point lead,

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and they will win the game by three on a

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last second touchdown reception Nico Collins back left corner of

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the end zone, fourteen seconds left. Texans come from behind

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and win the game. That prison that puts them at

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fourteen and oh, Arizona home. Can you even name five cardinals?

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I can't? Fifteen? And oh the Las Vegas Reed is

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former Seahawk quarterback now running things there. He doesn't know

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a city he's in. He can't believe is in Las Vegas.

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They're throwing dice on the sideline. Texans win by two touchdowns.

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Geno Smith doesn't even finish the game because of boredom.

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Then the seventeenth week, back to Los Angeles to take

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on the Chargers. The crowd will be eighty percent Texans fans. Anyway,

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sixty thousand Texans fans will make their way to Los Angeles.

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They'll go to sixteen and oh when they beat the

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Chargers at so five, Yeah, suck at Jonathan Allen and

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then the Colts and the Texans. As the Texans try

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to go for a seventeen and oh season yet again,

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they will do so oh damn. S's like, we got

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to put this team game on because we want to

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see the Texans go to seventeen and oh. They arrest

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their starters having clinched the number one seeds. At this point,

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they taste seventeen and oh, they taste home field. Throughout

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the AFC playoffs. Richardson will rush for sixty four yards

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in the first half at running back. Is he's still

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playing QB at this point, he's running for his life

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and as is Eyeshire Ear will forearm shiver him to

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the face. He won't play the second half. Texans beat

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the Colts by three touchdowns. So, wow, Jonathan and Ross,

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I present to you a seventeen and oh Texans season. Unbelievable.

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That's what I'm talking about unbelievable. Nobody else in the

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marketplace will do that. I just did it. Wow your

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thoughts and the Texans going seventeen and oh since no

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one in Houston Ross is talking about the Texans NFL

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schedule and the predictions we hear at Sports Talk seven,

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I need to do it for you. Twelve thirty five.

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Bras you ready, no, quickly, I can do this a

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lot faster. So somebody to speed up on a week's time. Actually,

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all right? Matthew Stafford three h nine and two scores

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Rams the Texans in Week one. Oh god, it's a

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Ram victory. I will say, twenty seven to seventeen Rams tough.

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Number two Texans home for the Monday night game against

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Tampa Bay. They get out to a fast lead, but

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Baker Mayfield throws three touchdowns in the second half. He

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is the comeback kid. Twenty seven to twenty four Bucks

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beat the Texans. That's tough. Texans open up the year

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at oh to two. Jacksonville, Week three. Trevor Lawrence hasn't

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cut his hair since training camp. Really, he's got a

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main of the uniform. You can grab that. He's got

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a huge main going. He also runs for a touchdown

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on the fourth quarter, Alsi's Asha ear gets called for

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a personal foul for a horse collar, setting up a

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first in goalt to one quarterback sneaks it in. They

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also win twenty seven to twenty four. Oh wow, geez,

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Texans tough on. Oh heartbreaker. Cam Ward comes in in

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week four. Dang rushes for one hundred, throws for one

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hundred and seventeen twenty to seventeen. Titans beat the Texans

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their own four. That's a tight one there. Ross What

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always happens to the Texans when they go to Baltimore.

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We don't even need to talk about this. Lay Henry

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just got a new deal. Dereck Henry two touchdowns, Lamar

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Jackson four passing touchdowns, forty to fourteen blowout in Baltimore. Oh,

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come on, Texans go to Seattle in week number seven.

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Cal can't find a ESPN Plus under any circumstance. Yes

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he can, it's on his xbox. No, he can't find it.

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Hannah's yelling at him, saying, come with me to the game.

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He goes, He goes, No, I want, I want to

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watch it on the money. I got the ESPN app

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on his PS five there's no doubt in my mind.

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Big day for Seattle. Five field goals eighteen to six.

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The game's got nothing but field goals in it. Seven

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field goals in the two teams. By the way, constant

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rain in Seattle for that Monday night game. Well, of course,

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so the Texans are owing six, then you've got Kittle.

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George Kittle's gonna catch. You know, the Texans can't cover

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tight ends never three touchdowns by himself three Well play

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amNY fantasy team that week rock Party two forty nine,

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rock Port Party three. In those three touchdowns all to

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George Kittle, It's a twenty four to twenty win. Oh

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is this fascerrating? One ozh six point two uh niners win.

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Texans are owned seven. Genos Man comes in, not eloquent,

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throws a couple of picks. They're actually thinking about replacing it,

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replacing him late in the game. But he puts together

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a massive drive with one forty nine on the clock

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and no timeouts, eighty five yard drive, Phil goal wins

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it for Denver thirty to twenty seven. Texan's still looking

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for their first win. There is genals Smith doing on Denver.

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There was a trade who's the quarterback a Denver now

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Bo Nicks? Oh? Nicks was Jeters Smith in Vegas? I'm

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getting getting teams. Who's in Seattle? Uh? Who Seattle's quarterback? Now?

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Oh it's uh Uh? I said it to you. Donald.

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There we go at least mixed up. I didn't mentioned

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Donald's name by the name that I and not yet? Okay, well,

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then shut up? Owen eight of the Texans. Jacksonville comes in.

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Every time the Jaguars and Texans play. It's a coin flipper. C. J.

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Stroud throws a pick six late in the game twenty fourteen.

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Come on, man, Jacksonville with the win. This is hater,

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Matt tanas Owen nine not good. Texans always go to

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Nashville when the orders. When the Tennessee Titans are run

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the order arms the Titans have given that up. It

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will make a difference. Derrick Henry not there. But who's

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the running back for the Titans now Tony Pollard. Two

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scores late within the last five minutes, a fumble Nico

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Collins tries again an extra Aready keep a drive alive

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in Coughs football up Tennessee's short position in the red zone.

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Tennessee wins twenty seven twenty. That's tough scenes. Josh Allen

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was embarrassed by the last time he was in Houston.

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You won't be embarrassed this time. Three sixty eight and

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four scores. Oh my gosh, Thursday thirty one thirteen Buffalo

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at the win Man. That's flight on a Thursday. That

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puts the Texans at on eleven. That's is there heat

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on Dimico Ryans at this point? Anthony Richardson throws for

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two to nine. Okay, now you're loing Rose two scores,

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runs for two twenty eight seventeen. Texans lose at Indianapolis.

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There Owen twe throws for two nine two. He goes

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four for twenty throwing and he throws for two oh

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nine with big four big bombs. ROSSI, what did the

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Texans do when they go to Kansas City each and

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every year? They get their ass? Whoop? Still go and

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give the final score to that one for US twenty

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three to sixteen Ohn thirteen. Kyler Murray is playing for

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his next contract. He's running around like a Toddler. Run

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off with your food. C J. Strong gets food poisoning

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before the game and cannot play. Really, honey, Mills is

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he's still in the ross. Toney Mills throws for one

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to seventy five and two picks Arizona with the upset

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twenty one to ten Ohn fourteen. Gosh, this is rough

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Gino Smith and the eightes. It's a three twenty five game.

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Cal doesn't know that he's been there since ten o'clock.

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He thinks it's a noon game. Okay, so the coaching

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staff they're they're way too early. Fatigue sets in big

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comeback for the Raiders in the second half. They score

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fourteen in the fourth quarter and win twenty one seventeen wow,

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oh and fifteen. That is a big comeback. Chargers make

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up for last year's wild card loss in Los Angeles.

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Herbert the truth, the truth. It's the truth that he

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threw four interceptions in that playoff game. Justin now, go

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Chargas go. Arnold Schwarzenegger bangs the drum before kickoff. Herbert

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throws for three on nine and three scores. Doesn't know

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a pick three on nine. I didn't stutterr three on nine.

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Chargers win it. Oh. I can't believe this. Thirty one

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to seven. Wow. Wow, that's a massive beatdown. I would

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to day all right, Indianapolis Week number seventeen, money meals

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gets to start again because CJ wants to rest to

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get ready for next season. It's kind of an odd one, No,

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I get it. I mean they're owing sixteen. Nico Collins

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also suffering with a hamstring injury. This team is beset

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by injuries. The Colts and Texans have nothing to play for.

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Anthony Richardson starts the game, doesn't finish it, but still

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runs for two scores in a seventeen to seven Colts

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win at NRG. Hannah then says, we're moving out of

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this stadium so we can't win here anymore. We need

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a new facility in Fort Bink County, Texans. In the

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year zero and seventeen, there are devastating There are issues

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about the new offensive coordinator. Nick Cerio's gotta be gone.

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Cereo's in trouble, Demiico's in trouble, and Hannah can't get

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her stadium in Fort Bink County. It is a miserable, down,

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trotten year for the Houston Texans NFL franchise. Jeez, So

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there you have it, oh and seventeen, and my deepest

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sympathies to those of you that are decent, normal NFL

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Texans fans. Not Darley, not better Red, Bob, not deep

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still Dan, what about Bettle Red Ross I've long forgotten

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about him. Let's go Texans. I got eleven and six.

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First glance over under. By the way, Vegas recalibrate is

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nine and a half. Okay, that's a slight under from

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last year. Correct. I think it was a nine and

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a half or was it ten and a half? Last

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it was nine and a half because you lost a bet. Yeah,

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that's fine, all right, fans, I just told you your

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squad is going on seventeen this year. Any reaction whatsoever

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seven one three two one two five seven ninety seven

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one three two one two five seven niney if you

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want to react to what I think is going to

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be a down trotten here for the local football team.

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Oh and seventeen. Are you willing to come to grips

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with that