WEBVTT 1 00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:06.000 It's night with Dan Ray. I'm Delli Fleas, Boston News Radio. 2 00:00:07.080 --> 00:00:09.279 All Right, it's Valentine's Day night. 3 00:00:09.359 --> 00:00:12.800 I hope all of you have had a wonderful Valentine's Day. 4 00:00:13.439 --> 00:00:16.960 It's that day during the year when all of us 5 00:00:17.000 --> 00:00:21.559 focus on our love lives and whether they're satisfactory to 6 00:00:21.760 --> 00:00:25.440 us or whether they're not. Some Valentine's days are good. 7 00:00:25.480 --> 00:00:29.039 Some Valentine's days are not so good. And with us 8 00:00:29.079 --> 00:00:32.079 tonight to celebrate Valentine's Day and the release of her 9 00:00:33.039 --> 00:00:37.880 new book, Shot at Love is Boston photographer really an 10 00:00:37.960 --> 00:00:41.320 extraordinary person and a friend of mine. 11 00:00:41.399 --> 00:00:43.520 I'm a friend of their families. 12 00:00:43.039 --> 00:00:48.960 The Brett family of Dorchester who produced these fabulous photographers, 13 00:00:49.719 --> 00:00:53.159 and certainly right there amidst amidst the best of them 14 00:00:53.240 --> 00:00:55.799 is Carrie Brett. Carrie Brett, welcome back to Nightside. 15 00:00:55.840 --> 00:00:59.640 How are you hi? How are you happy? 16 00:00:59.719 --> 00:01:04.480 Valanin Times day and yeah, well for you right now 17 00:01:04.519 --> 00:01:08.319 it is it is a good Valentine's Day. And uh, 18 00:01:08.560 --> 00:01:14.680 but it has been a very interesting journey that you 19 00:01:14.840 --> 00:01:19.640 have been on. You're an award winning photographer. Uh, You've 20 00:01:19.959 --> 00:01:25.359 You've done photo shoots with some very big name celebrities. 21 00:01:25.439 --> 00:01:30.640 You've you know, shot for uh Boston Common magazine, the 22 00:01:30.719 --> 00:01:36.040 Globe magazine for many years. You were the chief photographer 23 00:01:36.120 --> 00:01:41.000 for The Improper Bostonian, which many of our listeners will remember. 24 00:01:41.879 --> 00:01:46.799 You also now have a top rank dating podcast, and 25 00:01:47.280 --> 00:01:49.480 that dating podcast. 26 00:01:49.040 --> 00:01:51.159 Is really what we're going to talk about tonight. And 27 00:01:51.239 --> 00:01:52.319 the book that has. 28 00:01:52.159 --> 00:01:55.439 Come out of that dating podcast is today, the day 29 00:01:55.480 --> 00:01:58.239 the book actually has been been released. 30 00:02:00.120 --> 00:02:04.319 The book has been live on Amazon for ten days 31 00:02:05.079 --> 00:02:10.080 with a push for the launch of Valentine's Day. So 32 00:02:10.400 --> 00:02:17.000 we did a short press push to celebrate Single Awareness Day, 33 00:02:17.199 --> 00:02:21.719 which singles call Valentine's Day because on Valentine's Day, it 34 00:02:21.759 --> 00:02:25.080 shines a light on the fact that you may be 35 00:02:25.159 --> 00:02:29.879 looking for love or you might be unhappy that you're alone, 36 00:02:30.159 --> 00:02:33.599 and it can be a hard day. So sure, Valentine's 37 00:02:33.639 --> 00:02:36.599 Day was the first with the launch day of my 38 00:02:36.680 --> 00:02:39.680 show five years ago, and I thought, wouldn't it be 39 00:02:39.759 --> 00:02:43.599 great to launch the book on the fifth anniversary of 40 00:02:43.639 --> 00:02:43.960 the show. 41 00:02:45.039 --> 00:02:50.919 Yeah, you were in a great relationship at this point, 42 00:02:51.400 --> 00:02:55.159 but you had some rough Valentine's Days over the last 43 00:02:55.680 --> 00:02:57.199 few years, correct, And that's. 44 00:02:57.080 --> 00:03:01.280 Part of the book, right, I had a lot of 45 00:03:01.719 --> 00:03:07.319 lonely holidays and sad Valentine's Days. I have a hard 46 00:03:07.360 --> 00:03:09.759 time with holidays in general, and I think it's because 47 00:03:10.759 --> 00:03:14.000 I had so much hardship when it came to the 48 00:03:14.080 --> 00:03:19.000 love department. And I'm very mindful and empathetic to those 49 00:03:19.360 --> 00:03:24.000 who feel left out or alone or have lost somebody. 50 00:03:24.879 --> 00:03:27.639 And if you've lost someone that you've loved, whether our 51 00:03:27.719 --> 00:03:31.159 relationship is ended or that passed away, it can be 52 00:03:31.319 --> 00:03:34.879 very trying. And I wanted to create a movement in 53 00:03:34.919 --> 00:03:39.479 a community for people to feel less alone. So that's 54 00:03:39.479 --> 00:03:40.599 what I've done with my show. 55 00:03:41.960 --> 00:03:45.680 Yeah, and the podcast is going well as I understand 56 00:03:45.719 --> 00:03:48.400 it correct, It's gone great. 57 00:03:48.479 --> 00:03:50.759 I love it. I love every minute of it. I 58 00:03:50.800 --> 00:03:54.919 bring the most amazing people into my life. The episodes 59 00:03:54.919 --> 00:03:58.360 that I produce are fascinating to me. And I say 60 00:03:58.400 --> 00:04:01.319 all the time that I think I created the show. 61 00:04:02.159 --> 00:04:04.400 I created the show for people who were struggling and 62 00:04:04.439 --> 00:04:07.240 people who are having a hard time on dating apps 63 00:04:07.280 --> 00:04:12.560 because I was one of those people. And and in 64 00:04:12.639 --> 00:04:14.960 the end, I think I actually did that show for 65 00:04:15.080 --> 00:04:19.240 me because it's so rewarding. It makes me so happy 66 00:04:19.240 --> 00:04:20.199 that I can help people. 67 00:04:21.079 --> 00:04:23.399 Well, let's I want to talk about it and it's 68 00:04:23.600 --> 00:04:27.759 it's interesting you you disclosed to me the other day 69 00:04:27.839 --> 00:04:30.360 that there came a point in your life where you 70 00:04:30.399 --> 00:04:38.680 were working and your your relationship fell apart. A lot 71 00:04:38.720 --> 00:04:42.639 of people have relationships that fall apart. And I'm sure 72 00:04:42.680 --> 00:04:45.920 that first Valentine's Day was tough. Your birthday also, as 73 00:04:45.959 --> 00:04:49.480 I understand, is February eleventh, so you could have sort 74 00:04:49.519 --> 00:04:52.600 of had the double whammy, if you will, of a 75 00:04:52.639 --> 00:04:56.000 few tough birthdays backed up by some tough Valentine's Days. 76 00:04:56.319 --> 00:04:59.959 Tell us some just just you know, sketch out the story, 77 00:05:00.439 --> 00:05:04.480 and then I want to sketch out all the people 78 00:05:05.000 --> 00:05:08.240 who you have interviewed, who you have photographed, and what 79 00:05:08.439 --> 00:05:11.560 lessons you've learned from this entire experience. 80 00:05:12.560 --> 00:05:17.839 Okay, so let me take you back about twenty years ago. 81 00:05:18.920 --> 00:05:22.959 My marriage was falling apart, and I had a one 82 00:05:23.040 --> 00:05:25.920 year old and I was getting divorced, and I went 83 00:05:25.959 --> 00:05:29.480 through a three year custody battle that was very difficult, 84 00:05:30.519 --> 00:05:33.560 and I found myself dating with a baby on my hip, 85 00:05:33.680 --> 00:05:37.160 pre dating apps or cell phones or texting or any 86 00:05:37.160 --> 00:05:39.560 of those things. And then I was in a long 87 00:05:39.639 --> 00:05:43.959 term relationship for eight years and the bottom fell out 88 00:05:44.000 --> 00:05:49.360 of that suddenly as they do, and I had one 89 00:05:49.399 --> 00:05:53.920 of my very young photography assistants decided to put me 90 00:05:53.959 --> 00:05:57.079 on Tinder, and so I became an early evolution dating 91 00:05:57.120 --> 00:06:00.639 app user of Tinder, and my whole world opened up. 92 00:06:01.000 --> 00:06:05.040 And little by little, by using the dating app, one 93 00:06:05.079 --> 00:06:07.439 swipe and one day at a time, I rebuilt my 94 00:06:07.519 --> 00:06:12.839 life back and slowly rebuilt my confidence. So where I 95 00:06:12.920 --> 00:06:16.079 was struggling was that I was a successful person on paper. 96 00:06:16.839 --> 00:06:19.519 I was a business owner. I had a high pressure 97 00:06:19.600 --> 00:06:25.040 job photographing covers for the leading leading city magazine, and 98 00:06:25.360 --> 00:06:30.079 I had no information and I was I certainly couldn't 99 00:06:30.079 --> 00:06:34.120 tell anyone what was behind the lens of my life, 100 00:06:34.240 --> 00:06:37.360 and I desperately tried to help myself, and I couldn't 101 00:06:37.439 --> 00:06:40.680 because I didn't have any strategy. But I did have 102 00:06:41.560 --> 00:06:46.959 this little device call Tender that changed everything for me 103 00:06:47.920 --> 00:06:49.600 and Jerry. 104 00:06:49.800 --> 00:06:53.199 Was there not a period of time when many people 105 00:06:53.800 --> 00:06:57.480 were certainly you know those so sort of dating apps 106 00:06:57.480 --> 00:07:00.680 had just come along, But it wasn't something that you 107 00:07:00.720 --> 00:07:03.160 were going to probably advertise that you were on Tinder. 108 00:07:03.240 --> 00:07:06.000 Wasn't this sort of a stigma at some point attached 109 00:07:06.639 --> 00:07:10.800 to that into It wasn't something that you would be advertising. 110 00:07:10.839 --> 00:07:13.040 I'm on Tinder right well. 111 00:07:13.000 --> 00:07:17.639 Right, No, certainly not as a single mom living in Hingham. 112 00:07:18.319 --> 00:07:21.160 I think I joked that I was probably one of 113 00:07:21.160 --> 00:07:23.199 the only people at the time because it was new 114 00:07:24.120 --> 00:07:26.759 and so people didn't know anything about it. But also 115 00:07:27.360 --> 00:07:30.920 to get divorced with the baby back then was also 116 00:07:32.040 --> 00:07:35.759 difficult and not the norm, and so I was a 117 00:07:35.800 --> 00:07:39.680 trailblazer in that sense. But that was my reality, that 118 00:07:39.839 --> 00:07:43.319 was my situation, and I had to trail a. 119 00:07:43.319 --> 00:07:47.399 Tough trail to blaze, to carry it is it is. 120 00:07:49.480 --> 00:07:53.000 But I wasn't afraid of dating apps. I made my 121 00:07:53.040 --> 00:07:57.720 own decision. I listened to my intuition and I had 122 00:07:57.839 --> 00:08:00.560 luck there and I liked it, and I had a 123 00:08:00.560 --> 00:08:02.000 lot of luck because I don't think I had a 124 00:08:02.040 --> 00:08:04.720 lot of competition because there wasn't a lot of women 125 00:08:04.720 --> 00:08:07.240 in my age at forty three on it. And then 126 00:08:07.279 --> 00:08:12.959 I also knew that online dating with marketing and branding 127 00:08:13.079 --> 00:08:15.319 at its best, and that was something that I was 128 00:08:15.439 --> 00:08:20.680 an expert in. And so God, do you have a question, jam. 129 00:08:21.199 --> 00:08:26.000 Yeah, yeah, In other words, is this part of the book? 130 00:08:26.079 --> 00:08:30.279 In other words, that you've written this book to basically 131 00:08:30.319 --> 00:08:34.639 give other people who find themselves in a bad situation 132 00:08:34.879 --> 00:08:37.320 that has that has either disappeared or as you say, 133 00:08:37.360 --> 00:08:38.120 the bottom. 134 00:08:37.840 --> 00:08:38.679 Has fallen out. 135 00:08:39.200 --> 00:08:43.080 Is part of this book to basically show the world, Hey, 136 00:08:43.840 --> 00:08:46.759 if you can do it and you can pull yourself 137 00:08:46.799 --> 00:08:50.720 back into a better place, other men and other women 138 00:08:50.799 --> 00:08:53.320 can do it as well. 139 00:08:53.399 --> 00:08:58.519 Right. So originally that was the first idea of the 140 00:08:58.559 --> 00:09:02.720 original concept of a book, was that, Okay, I have 141 00:09:02.759 --> 00:09:06.600 all this information that I've learned about online dating, but 142 00:09:06.639 --> 00:09:10.840 then it would be kind of I'd be talking. I 143 00:09:10.840 --> 00:09:14.200 would be teaching or preaching or something like that. And 144 00:09:15.480 --> 00:09:19.679 I'm a big fan of the Chicken Soup for the 145 00:09:19.720 --> 00:09:24.440 Soul series and Jack Canfield. No, Jack Canfield was a 146 00:09:25.120 --> 00:09:29.440 teacher and before he was a writer, and he realized 147 00:09:29.519 --> 00:09:33.960 that how he taught his students was he would come 148 00:09:34.039 --> 00:09:38.000 up with these elaborate stories and then he could teach 149 00:09:38.480 --> 00:09:43.879 teach his students through these elaborate, elaborate stories. And I 150 00:09:43.919 --> 00:09:48.399 always felt that I was that my father was exactly 151 00:09:48.480 --> 00:09:51.519 like Jack Canfield. I mean he holds corner Duncan Donuts 152 00:09:51.519 --> 00:09:53.600 for two hours a day telling stories. I mean he 153 00:09:53.759 --> 00:09:56.399 just I know where his schedule, where his hit his 154 00:09:56.480 --> 00:10:00.120 setlist is every day because wherever he goes there's a 155 00:10:00.200 --> 00:10:05.879 large crowd, And because I'm justlike him and Irish and 156 00:10:05.919 --> 00:10:10.559 love to tell stories, I had all these wild tales 157 00:10:10.679 --> 00:10:17.919 about dating, but they spanned over twenty years and it 158 00:10:17.960 --> 00:10:21.919 all happened in the city of Boston, with the background 159 00:10:21.960 --> 00:10:26.399 being the magazine. So I had all these fabulous characters 160 00:10:26.440 --> 00:10:30.080 and subjects who were my friends that lived through all 161 00:10:30.159 --> 00:10:33.279 this with me, And I thought, well, this is a 162 00:10:33.320 --> 00:10:38.159 Netflix series. This is something really entertaining, so you don't 163 00:10:38.200 --> 00:10:40.480 have to be looking for love to love this book. 164 00:10:41.159 --> 00:10:45.240 And a lot of people don't really know what to 165 00:10:45.279 --> 00:10:48.200 think of me, I think, and they put me in 166 00:10:48.759 --> 00:10:51.279 lots of different boxes and lots of different categories. But 167 00:10:51.360 --> 00:10:53.559 the truth be told, more men listen to my shows 168 00:10:53.559 --> 00:10:58.120 than women, and more men are fans of this book 169 00:10:58.240 --> 00:11:02.840 so far. Divorce men love it and they desperately need 170 00:11:02.879 --> 00:11:05.840 help as well as women, so I help both. 171 00:11:06.480 --> 00:11:07.600 All right, well, let's do this. 172 00:11:09.039 --> 00:11:11.720 I got to take a pause on that positive point, 173 00:11:12.360 --> 00:11:15.600 and we will continue our conversation and if people would 174 00:11:15.600 --> 00:11:19.080 like to compare notes or ask questions, Carrie's going to 175 00:11:19.120 --> 00:11:20.120 stick with us. 176 00:11:19.919 --> 00:11:21.080 For a while here. 177 00:11:21.159 --> 00:11:24.279 I hope we stay talking about this until eleven o'clock 178 00:11:24.320 --> 00:11:28.519 it's Valentine's Day again. I hope all of you are 179 00:11:28.919 --> 00:11:33.759 with someone you love. If you're not, fear not, there 180 00:11:33.799 --> 00:11:36.360 will be other Valentine's Day, and there will be days, 181 00:11:36.360 --> 00:11:39.360 and it will be other Christmases and other birthdays and 182 00:11:39.480 --> 00:11:43.799 all of that, and not everyone is lucky in love 183 00:11:43.960 --> 00:11:46.759 and able to fall in love with their high school 184 00:11:46.840 --> 00:11:50.200 sweetheart and remain married for seventy years till death do 185 00:11:50.320 --> 00:11:55.159 you part. Most people go through these days that these statistics, 186 00:11:55.519 --> 00:12:00.279 statistics tell us at least one divorce, maybe more, and 187 00:12:00.320 --> 00:12:05.159 certainly many breakups along the way. With us. Carrie Brett 188 00:12:05.360 --> 00:12:08.919 an award winning photographer. She's the lead photographer of a 189 00:12:08.960 --> 00:12:12.320 magazine that many of us missed, The Improper Bostonian. She 190 00:12:12.399 --> 00:12:17.919 has shot photographs and pictures for just about any journal 191 00:12:18.039 --> 00:12:23.360 that you could imagine. Her new book out today, Shot 192 00:12:23.559 --> 00:12:27.919 at Love, a Memoir by Carrie Brett. She kind of 193 00:12:28.120 --> 00:12:34.720 just tells the story of being as as she said, 194 00:12:34.759 --> 00:12:39.240 after hitting rock bottom. She became an early adopter of 195 00:12:39.320 --> 00:12:42.200 dating apps at age forty three while balancing life as 196 00:12:42.240 --> 00:12:46.200 a single mom. She has this podcast, she has this book, 197 00:12:46.720 --> 00:12:48.600 and I'm sure she'd love to chat with you. Six 198 00:12:49.960 --> 00:12:56.080 ten thirty six thirty back with Carrie Brett talking about 199 00:12:56.080 --> 00:12:59.559 a shot at love on Valentine's Day. Uh. And if 200 00:12:59.559 --> 00:13:02.600 you're out there and you need a tip as to 201 00:13:02.879 --> 00:13:04.679 how to get back on the circuit, how to get 202 00:13:04.679 --> 00:13:06.360 back in the game, Carrie's here. 203 00:13:06.440 --> 00:13:07.559 We'll be back right after this. 204 00:13:08.919 --> 00:13:11.879 Now back to Dan Ray live from the Window World 205 00:13:12.000 --> 00:13:15.759 night Side Studios on WBZ News Radio. 206 00:13:17.159 --> 00:13:20.639 My guest is Carrie Brett, an award winning host of 207 00:13:20.759 --> 00:13:25.200 Top Rank Dating podcast Carrie Brett. Carry, you are out 208 00:13:25.279 --> 00:13:31.720 on as a single mom. You were out dating for 209 00:13:31.879 --> 00:13:36.399 how many years be found before you found the actual 210 00:13:36.440 --> 00:13:38.440 love of your life who you've been with now for 211 00:13:38.720 --> 00:13:39.240 some time? 212 00:13:40.679 --> 00:13:44.600 Yes, about on and off for about two years, because 213 00:13:44.679 --> 00:13:52.639 I kept going back and I also so, so the 214 00:13:52.679 --> 00:13:56.000 relationship had ended, but I had a couple of more 215 00:13:56.039 --> 00:13:59.440 times that of the back and forth. Yeah, and then 216 00:13:59.480 --> 00:14:05.559 I I was in short term relationships, which I found 217 00:14:05.639 --> 00:14:10.879 myself having these back to back short relationships. And throughout 218 00:14:11.000 --> 00:14:15.080 all these failed relationships is where the learning and the 219 00:14:15.120 --> 00:14:18.600 growth came. And I didn't know it at the time 220 00:14:18.639 --> 00:14:21.159 that I was becoming the person that I was supposed 221 00:14:21.200 --> 00:14:24.840 to be to pull in the right person. So I 222 00:14:24.879 --> 00:14:26.919 had to pull in the wrong person and have all 223 00:14:26.919 --> 00:14:29.799 these no's to move towards the U s. 224 00:14:32.399 --> 00:14:34.799 It's kind of it's a tough story. 225 00:14:36.759 --> 00:14:41.919 Are you still in touch with your former husband with 226 00:14:41.960 --> 00:14:43.000 whom you had. 227 00:14:44.240 --> 00:14:44.759 A child? 228 00:14:46.519 --> 00:14:51.519 Well that was that story is twenty That story isn't 229 00:14:51.559 --> 00:14:56.519 in the book because there's other stories, and also it's 230 00:14:56.600 --> 00:15:01.679 the father of my daughter. So I decided to okay 231 00:15:01.799 --> 00:15:04.200 to leave that out, you know, for my daughter, which 232 00:15:04.279 --> 00:15:12.399 was understandable. But there's plenty of unbelievable stories in there 233 00:15:13.000 --> 00:15:16.000 that touch upon But I think a lot of people, 234 00:15:16.000 --> 00:15:17.720 a lot of single people go through. 235 00:15:18.360 --> 00:15:20.279 Well I want to get to those, but before that, 236 00:15:20.519 --> 00:15:23.720 just to get you in focus and in context, here 237 00:15:24.600 --> 00:15:29.480 give us the names of as you were going through this, 238 00:15:30.480 --> 00:15:34.480 you were you know of of this, this, I don't 239 00:15:34.480 --> 00:15:37.799 know what you want to call it, journey, this search whatever. 240 00:15:39.000 --> 00:15:42.840 You were in your in your job, in your profession. 241 00:15:43.600 --> 00:15:50.000 You were meeting and photographing some very exciting celebrities as well, 242 00:15:51.240 --> 00:15:55.519 and you you learned What did you learn from from 243 00:15:55.559 --> 00:15:59.799 those celebrities? I mean they we see the celebrities and 244 00:16:00.120 --> 00:16:03.639 you assume that their lives are all perfect, But you 245 00:16:03.759 --> 00:16:05.480 get to spend a lot of time with a lot 246 00:16:05.480 --> 00:16:08.799 of these celebrities, and I assume that you came to 247 00:16:08.840 --> 00:16:12.360 realize that their lives were not perfect. 248 00:16:14.080 --> 00:16:18.320 Well, I don't think there's any person who goes through 249 00:16:19.039 --> 00:16:23.200 this classroom really, which is what I call earth. This 250 00:16:23.279 --> 00:16:26.279 is not supposed to be heaven. We're supposed to learn 251 00:16:27.240 --> 00:16:32.159 and the struggle is may look different for other people, 252 00:16:32.360 --> 00:16:37.159 but people struggle through all sorts of heartbreak and all 253 00:16:37.200 --> 00:16:43.320 sorts of challenges. And when I photograph people, I can 254 00:16:43.399 --> 00:16:46.360 cut away all the exterior and see their heart and 255 00:16:46.399 --> 00:16:49.039 see the type of person that they are. I'm not 256 00:16:49.159 --> 00:16:52.039 friends with all the celebrities that I photographed. I may 257 00:16:52.080 --> 00:16:54.840 have not clicked or connected with them in such a way. 258 00:16:55.240 --> 00:16:58.000 But the people that are in my book I did, 259 00:16:58.320 --> 00:17:01.440 and I was huge fans of and because of the 260 00:17:01.519 --> 00:17:05.880 kindness and the generosity that they had within their hearts, 261 00:17:06.119 --> 00:17:09.960 they helped me along the way. And you know they 262 00:17:09.960 --> 00:17:13.279 say when a window closes or a door, you know whatever, 263 00:17:13.319 --> 00:17:15.319 the saying is that someone will show up. 264 00:17:15.240 --> 00:17:18.559 And be that one door closes, another door opens. I'm 265 00:17:18.680 --> 00:17:20.920 very fooliar with that, and I've experienced out in my life. 266 00:17:20.960 --> 00:17:23.079 Let me ask you this before we go to break here, 267 00:17:23.400 --> 00:17:26.319 just give me a list of some of the celebrities 268 00:17:26.359 --> 00:17:28.000 people will meet in this book. 269 00:17:28.039 --> 00:17:32.960 Shot at Love Sure, So we start with my best friend, 270 00:17:33.160 --> 00:17:36.759 the Wing Girl, another single mother, my friend Kelly Doyle, 271 00:17:37.519 --> 00:17:40.599 who we can't do this with our friends, so she's 272 00:17:40.640 --> 00:17:45.319 the first friendship. She gets married long before I find love, 273 00:17:45.880 --> 00:17:49.559 but she teaches me about worthiness and if you don't 274 00:17:49.559 --> 00:17:54.319 have worthiness, then you're not You're certainly not going to 275 00:17:54.359 --> 00:17:59.559 find love. And then I take you through the different 276 00:17:59.559 --> 00:18:02.279 people that worked with me at the improper celebrity writer 277 00:18:02.400 --> 00:18:10.720 Jonathan Sorov financer and celebrity writer John Spooner. These were 278 00:18:10.799 --> 00:18:15.240 two guys my publisher, Wendy Simonian epic. She marries the 279 00:18:15.319 --> 00:18:20.359 general manager of our magazine, our local digs. He definitely 280 00:18:20.480 --> 00:18:25.400 dug Wendy and they got married at that wedding. I 281 00:18:25.480 --> 00:18:28.240 meet someone who didn't know it at the time while 282 00:18:28.279 --> 00:18:31.240 I was single. I would find I think twelve or 283 00:18:31.240 --> 00:18:35.640 fifteen years later on Tinder a lot of so some 284 00:18:35.720 --> 00:18:39.960 of the celebrities, Chris Cooper taught me some valuable lessons. 285 00:18:41.079 --> 00:18:46.039 Steve Carell, Tim Wakefield. I photographed a lot of Red 286 00:18:46.079 --> 00:18:49.559 Sox players for twenty eight years every year for the 287 00:18:49.599 --> 00:18:54.400 Red Sox Edition issue and Tim was someone that I 288 00:18:54.440 --> 00:18:58.559 connected the most with and he helped me every spring 289 00:18:59.160 --> 00:19:07.000 season and it was just a really kind person, great 290 00:19:07.240 --> 00:19:12.359 great man. Lucky to have known him. Let's see my mentor, 291 00:19:12.559 --> 00:19:17.240 Jeff Lubin helps me with my dating breakthrough. And then 292 00:19:17.319 --> 00:19:21.000 I date a whole cast of characters that their names 293 00:19:21.000 --> 00:19:24.039 have been changed and their identities and all that, so 294 00:19:24.079 --> 00:19:24.920 you don't know who they are. 295 00:19:26.839 --> 00:19:29.319 You also, by the way, have a pretty good relationship. 296 00:19:29.759 --> 00:19:31.440 I recall with Bill Belichick. 297 00:19:35.039 --> 00:19:37.960 Well, Bill, it was always very good to me, very 298 00:19:38.000 --> 00:19:40.960 kind to me. A photograph him twice for two covers. 299 00:19:41.480 --> 00:19:47.440 And Julian Edelman is in the book. He is He's 300 00:19:47.759 --> 00:19:53.240 that scrappy player who, oh yeah, I align with because 301 00:19:54.000 --> 00:19:58.559 he had the determination and the grit to to do 302 00:19:58.759 --> 00:20:02.240 the I mean, he his mind just shows that he 303 00:20:02.400 --> 00:20:04.599 was told no. I think a lot of these celebrities 304 00:20:04.920 --> 00:20:11.640 were told no throughout their career and that made them 305 00:20:11.839 --> 00:20:14.799 kind of feel sorry for me because I was being 306 00:20:14.839 --> 00:20:18.799 told no. Not at the magazine, but I was being 307 00:20:18.799 --> 00:20:24.680 told no through dating, and so that's that's what happens. Though. 308 00:20:25.880 --> 00:20:27.480 Let me take a break. We've got to We've got 309 00:20:27.480 --> 00:20:31.799 a newscast coming up again. Feel free to join the conversation, folks. 310 00:20:31.799 --> 00:20:36.799 This is Valentine's Night. My guest Carrie Brett. She's an 311 00:20:36.839 --> 00:20:41.279 award winning photographer and host of a top rank dating podcast, 312 00:20:41.319 --> 00:20:45.680 and her book Shot at Love is a memoir of 313 00:20:45.720 --> 00:20:49.640 her life, which has been in many ways an extraordinary 314 00:20:49.680 --> 00:20:52.880 life and also in many ways a similar life to 315 00:20:52.960 --> 00:20:57.440 what most of us have lived, ups and downs, as 316 00:20:57.480 --> 00:21:01.279 many ups or as many downs, as many ups, and 317 00:21:01.960 --> 00:21:04.400 she kind of bears her soul in this book. And 318 00:21:04.960 --> 00:21:08.720 if you'd like to chat, we got some numbers for 319 00:21:08.759 --> 00:21:11.359 you six one, seven, two, four, ten thirty or six 320 00:21:11.400 --> 00:21:15.240 one seven, nine to three, one ten thirty. Back on 321 00:21:15.400 --> 00:21:18.079 Night Side with Carrie Brett right after this news break 322 00:21:18.160 --> 00:21:20.920 at the bottom of the hour. It's Valentine's Day night 323 00:21:21.039 --> 00:21:23.799 here in Boston and all around the world, It's. 324 00:21:23.759 --> 00:21:28.160 Night Side with Ray on Boston's news radio. 325 00:21:29.680 --> 00:21:33.160 My guess it's Carrie Brett, her new book, Shot at Love. 326 00:21:33.319 --> 00:21:36.160 And again you have to understand the double onendre here 327 00:21:36.240 --> 00:21:41.599 that covers beautiful Carrie Brett herself is a beautiful woman 328 00:21:42.799 --> 00:21:45.839 who comes from a tremendous family and has been through 329 00:21:46.920 --> 00:21:49.319 I guess the grinder is the way you describe it. 330 00:21:49.319 --> 00:21:51.720 It's described. The book is described as a fearless and 331 00:21:51.759 --> 00:21:54.599 funny memoir of heartbreak, resilience in finding love in the 332 00:21:54.640 --> 00:21:59.799 modern age. Your stepdaughter, your daughter, excuse me, your daughter 333 00:22:01.039 --> 00:22:06.440 is now in college. So you were able to raise 334 00:22:06.519 --> 00:22:11.000 your daughter for most of it on your own while 335 00:22:11.039 --> 00:22:17.359 you maintained a very active business as a photographer, which 336 00:22:17.759 --> 00:22:23.400 was challenging. Uh and anyone out there who finds themselves 337 00:22:23.400 --> 00:22:28.519 in a situation and similar situation and needs to find 338 00:22:28.599 --> 00:22:32.160 someone who who can in effect throw them a life preserver, 339 00:22:33.440 --> 00:22:35.240 philosophical life preserver. 340 00:22:35.440 --> 00:22:36.240 It would be you. 341 00:22:37.559 --> 00:22:41.559 There had to been days, Carrie, when you went through 342 00:22:41.559 --> 00:22:44.720 this and again when I say you're beautiful, you're you're 343 00:22:44.759 --> 00:22:49.759 a beautiful woman, and you're also an awfully good and 344 00:22:50.880 --> 00:22:54.079 wonderful woman with a good heart and a good mind. 345 00:22:54.680 --> 00:22:56.240 There had to have been days when you had to 346 00:22:56.279 --> 00:22:59.839 see yourself that was wrong with me? That I find 347 00:22:59.839 --> 00:23:04.240 my self in this situation, And I'm sure it's in 348 00:23:04.240 --> 00:23:08.799 the book. How did you deal with those days when 349 00:23:09.000 --> 00:23:11.400 I guess you probably got up and said, you know, 350 00:23:13.039 --> 00:23:15.319 I don't want to get out of bed today. 351 00:23:15.519 --> 00:23:17.039 I just want to go back to sleep. 352 00:23:17.599 --> 00:23:21.559 But how did you continue to get yourself back in 353 00:23:21.640 --> 00:23:25.240 the game and back in the game successfully. 354 00:23:26.200 --> 00:23:31.079 Well. The job that I had I loved, and so 355 00:23:31.279 --> 00:23:33.160 I was happy to go to work every day, to 356 00:23:33.200 --> 00:23:35.559 be honest, And I think that because I was so 357 00:23:35.680 --> 00:23:41.200 driven and worked so hard that always so I really 358 00:23:41.200 --> 00:23:43.240 didn't have a choice because I was a single mom 359 00:23:43.400 --> 00:23:45.960 and I had to keep the roof over my head 360 00:23:46.000 --> 00:23:48.799 and I had my little girl I had to take 361 00:23:48.839 --> 00:23:53.720 care of, so she really was my guiding light that 362 00:23:54.079 --> 00:23:57.119 if I couldn't fight for myself, I had to fight 363 00:23:57.160 --> 00:24:02.799 for her, and she really became my why because when 364 00:24:02.839 --> 00:24:07.480 you become that hopeless, it's very difficult to carry on, 365 00:24:08.440 --> 00:24:12.279 and it's difficult to tell people that you're in that 366 00:24:12.279 --> 00:24:16.319 that low because if you come from a very proud 367 00:24:16.400 --> 00:24:20.839 Irish Catholic family like I do, that I think that 368 00:24:20.920 --> 00:24:24.559 was my hardest piece was that I was very good 369 00:24:25.079 --> 00:24:29.440 at concealing I thought anyways. I think I know people 370 00:24:29.519 --> 00:24:34.200 who are close to me could see it. But I 371 00:24:34.319 --> 00:24:37.359 was always at work early with a smile on my 372 00:24:37.440 --> 00:24:44.279 face and never really complained. And I think that came 373 00:24:44.400 --> 00:24:47.400 as such a shock to everyone at the magazine that 374 00:24:47.480 --> 00:24:49.880 they couldn't believe that I did such a good job 375 00:24:49.960 --> 00:24:53.680 there and did all these things when what I was 376 00:24:53.720 --> 00:24:57.759 concealing about my past was was far from picture perfect. 377 00:24:58.839 --> 00:25:00.279 But I think that's a lot of you people. 378 00:25:01.519 --> 00:25:05.799 How tough was it to finally say, Okay, I have 379 00:25:05.880 --> 00:25:11.079 to break out of my circle of friends, my my 380 00:25:11.079 --> 00:25:15.400 my loving family and and I know your family very well. Uh, 381 00:25:15.440 --> 00:25:18.440 and I'm going to get on these some of these 382 00:25:18.480 --> 00:25:21.880 new things that this dating app thing, which a lot 383 00:25:21.880 --> 00:25:24.279 of people probably would have said, I have no idea 384 00:25:24.839 --> 00:25:29.279 who I'm meeting and who they might be. We've all 385 00:25:29.319 --> 00:25:32.440 heard the horror stories of you know, people who have 386 00:25:32.640 --> 00:25:33.640 you know, bad experience. 387 00:25:33.680 --> 00:25:37.279 Forget the experience where someone feels. 388 00:25:36.960 --> 00:25:41.039 In danger, which is a horrific experience, but you show 389 00:25:41.119 --> 00:25:44.599 up and you know the person is not what they 390 00:25:44.759 --> 00:25:48.119 represented themselves to be on the dating app that had. 391 00:25:48.400 --> 00:25:52.759 That's jumping into the deep end of the pool and 392 00:25:52.799 --> 00:25:54.559 not knowing if you're going to be able to swim. 393 00:25:54.920 --> 00:25:57.400 That's the only metaphor that I can explain. How would 394 00:25:57.440 --> 00:25:58.160 you explain it? 395 00:26:00.039 --> 00:26:01.920 Well, you said that with this showing up. When you 396 00:26:01.920 --> 00:26:04.599 said the word showing up. What made me think is 397 00:26:04.640 --> 00:26:08.559 that sometimes in life you need one person to believe 398 00:26:08.559 --> 00:26:12.160 in you, one person to show up. You don't need 399 00:26:12.200 --> 00:26:17.440 ten you need one. And in chapter fifteen, I had 400 00:26:17.480 --> 00:26:21.519 my longtime mentor who's a lot older than me. He's 401 00:26:21.559 --> 00:26:24.720