WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.160 --> 00:00:08.599 This is Pod Popular Podcast for the People, The. 2 00:00:08.599 --> 00:00:09.919 Great Love Debate. 3 00:00:10.759 --> 00:00:14.919 It's the Great Love Debate, the Great Love Debate. 4 00:00:15.839 --> 00:00:18.920 It's a great loved bab Hi, Get everyone, It's Brian Howie. 5 00:00:18.960 --> 00:00:22.519 Welcome to the Great Love Debate, the world's number one 6 00:00:22.760 --> 00:00:25.559 dating air relationship podcast since twenty fifteen. I am back 7 00:00:25.600 --> 00:00:29.600 here in the very fine studios of Pod Popular Podcasts 8 00:00:29.600 --> 00:00:31.920 for the People. I am the one in Boca Raton, Florida, 9 00:00:31.960 --> 00:00:36.439 and it is lovely. Somebody said to me once again, 10 00:00:36.600 --> 00:00:38.520 you don't enough guys on your podcast. You don't have 11 00:00:38.719 --> 00:00:41.280 men on your podcasts. And I'm always like, I want 12 00:00:41.320 --> 00:00:44.079 somebody who has a perspective that is more interesting than mine, 13 00:00:44.479 --> 00:00:46.600 that is deeper than mine, that has done more work 14 00:00:46.640 --> 00:00:47.320 than mine. 15 00:00:47.600 --> 00:00:49.119 So I was handed a book. 16 00:00:49.840 --> 00:00:53.039 About two weeks ago and I was like, Wow, I 17 00:00:53.119 --> 00:00:55.759 need to really dive into this. Is there any chance 18 00:00:55.799 --> 00:00:56.600 I can get the author? 19 00:00:56.960 --> 00:00:57.119 Well? 20 00:00:57.200 --> 00:00:58.240 I got the author. 21 00:00:58.359 --> 00:01:04.120 He wrote, Partners in Passion positively transform all your relationships 22 00:01:04.200 --> 00:01:07.319 with the power of a high vibration energy, which sounds 23 00:01:07.400 --> 00:01:09.359 very technical, but I think there's very practical in. 24 00:01:09.359 --> 00:01:12.200 There because I've read the book. David Francis, how are you. 25 00:01:12.599 --> 00:01:14.280 I'm good. Thanks, Brian, good to see you. 26 00:01:14.480 --> 00:01:16.840 That accent's not from South Florida. Where are you from? 27 00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:18.920 I am originally from England And. 28 00:01:18.799 --> 00:01:21.120 What brought you over here to the colonies? As are 29 00:01:21.120 --> 00:01:21.799 still the colonies. 30 00:01:21.879 --> 00:01:24.280 I went to Canada and founded a school, and then 31 00:01:24.359 --> 00:01:27.000 I came down to New York and now Florida. 32 00:01:27.159 --> 00:01:27.599 There you go. 33 00:01:27.640 --> 00:01:29.439 It seems to be going sound once you hit. 34 00:01:29.359 --> 00:01:31.400 New York, you always end up in Florida is where 35 00:01:31.400 --> 00:01:35.439 all of us Sex New Yorkers go. You're all about 36 00:01:35.439 --> 00:01:38.480 the energy and you believe that fundamentally we are not 37 00:01:38.599 --> 00:01:40.439 just wired a certain way, but there are things that 38 00:01:40.599 --> 00:01:43.159 attract us to each other. How did you get interested 39 00:01:43.200 --> 00:01:44.680 in that? And when did you first discover that? 40 00:01:44.879 --> 00:01:50.519 Absolutely right back college days, going to an esotic school 41 00:01:50.560 --> 00:01:53.480 in London and learning how to see and feel energy. 42 00:01:53.560 --> 00:01:55.560 So I learned how to see energy from my hands, 43 00:01:55.560 --> 00:01:58.200 how to see the aura around people. I like to 44 00:01:58.239 --> 00:02:01.480 call it the atmosphere around people. And that admit to 45 00:02:01.480 --> 00:02:04.239 the idea of what passion actually is, like partners in Passion. 46 00:02:04.239 --> 00:02:06.799 There reason it's that name is it's to do with 47 00:02:06.840 --> 00:02:09.719 any word that ends in ion is an energy word. 48 00:02:10.120 --> 00:02:15.240 Congratulate ion, pass ion, hesitate, ion, because an ion. You 49 00:02:15.280 --> 00:02:17.520 look it up in the dictionary. It's a positively or 50 00:02:17.560 --> 00:02:21.520 negatively charged particle. So two people having a passion means 51 00:02:21.520 --> 00:02:25.879 they're passing lots of energy backwards and forwards between them. Otherwise, 52 00:02:25.919 --> 00:02:29.360 if there's not much energy, there's not much passion, that unlikely. 53 00:02:29.759 --> 00:02:31.719 The guy says, why should we meet again? It's like, 54 00:02:31.919 --> 00:02:36.759 maybe not because there is not much passion exactly. Passion. 55 00:02:36.840 --> 00:02:40.840 Passion is fundamental. So and the initial passion I call 56 00:02:40.879 --> 00:02:45.719 it passion automatic almost like there's three gradations to relationships. 57 00:02:45.719 --> 00:02:48.919 They look at partners in passion. That's the beginning. And 58 00:02:49.000 --> 00:02:51.840 so two people can be attracted to each other. Then 59 00:02:51.879 --> 00:02:55.080 they develop a purpose between themselves. If they do, I 60 00:02:55.159 --> 00:02:58.280 call that the mutually agreed purpose or a map. And 61 00:02:58.319 --> 00:03:00.960 then if they're into the spiritual realm, they become partners 62 00:03:01.000 --> 00:03:04.840 in evolution. That's another step. Again, it's just like three 63 00:03:04.919 --> 00:03:05.599 levels to it. 64 00:03:05.680 --> 00:03:10.199 Yeah, right, So early on, so chemistry is a real thing. 65 00:03:10.240 --> 00:03:12.759 Early on when you feel sort of that that moment, 66 00:03:12.800 --> 00:03:15.159 that magic, and it continues and it continues, but early 67 00:03:15.199 --> 00:03:18.199 on it's like it it finds its level into what 68 00:03:18.240 --> 00:03:21.919 I needs. But early on it's it's it's mostly physical 69 00:03:22.000 --> 00:03:24.719 it's a little nervous, it's a lot of curiosity, it's 70 00:03:24.879 --> 00:03:27.599 somewhat rooted in hope. It's probably got a layer of fear. 71 00:03:28.080 --> 00:03:32.639 All of those kind of things are ions within our 72 00:03:32.479 --> 00:03:34.240 our bodies, minds and souls. 73 00:03:34.360 --> 00:03:36.240 Yes, there's a lot of the ions in the move 74 00:03:36.680 --> 00:03:40.360 and I look at it also that in the initial relationship, 75 00:03:40.800 --> 00:03:43.520 it's kind of a testing process. If it's only skin deep, 76 00:03:44.159 --> 00:03:47.520 that's twenty eight days. Skin deep goes with the sightle 77 00:03:47.560 --> 00:03:50.400 of the moon. So every twenty eight days we actually 78 00:03:50.400 --> 00:03:53.680 lose our skin cells. So we do we do. It's 79 00:03:53.719 --> 00:03:56.439 on the back of a toothpaste tube like, oh okay, 80 00:03:56.479 --> 00:04:00.360 but it's the case sorry of skin creadth. But every 81 00:04:00.360 --> 00:04:04.159 twenty eight days, our skin cells get sloughed off like 82 00:04:04.240 --> 00:04:06.879 a snake, like a snake. Thankfully, if it happened all 83 00:04:06.960 --> 00:04:07.560 at once. 84 00:04:07.479 --> 00:04:08.960 Okay, then it'll be kind of a mess. 85 00:04:09.039 --> 00:04:10.759 That would be a problem. Yes, we're saying I'm not 86 00:04:10.800 --> 00:04:13.400 coming out tonight now, I'm staying there right, Yeah, but no, 87 00:04:13.439 --> 00:04:16.000 it's it's happening all the time. When you're going around 88 00:04:16.000 --> 00:04:18.360 the place with the vacuum where it's saying where does 89 00:04:18.399 --> 00:04:19.199 all the dust come from? 90 00:04:19.279 --> 00:04:19.920 It comes from us. 91 00:04:19.959 --> 00:04:20.639 It comes from us. 92 00:04:20.680 --> 00:04:23.680 We're blaming the dog and the atmosphere. 93 00:04:23.120 --> 00:04:27.040 When vacuum up ourselves. So the twenty eight days relationship 94 00:04:27.120 --> 00:04:30.360 skin deep. That goes with the lunar cycle. Twenty eight days, 95 00:04:30.879 --> 00:04:33.720 twenty eight seasons, that's the seven year itch, that's the 96 00:04:33.759 --> 00:04:36.439 planetary cycle. It's like the man looks at the woman says, well, 97 00:04:36.639 --> 00:04:38.600 you're not the woman I'm married, or you're not the 98 00:04:38.600 --> 00:04:40.759 man I'm married. It's true. All the cells have been changed, 99 00:04:40.959 --> 00:04:42.920 right except for the cells in the brain. 100 00:04:43.959 --> 00:04:46.319 Is there a time in the lunar cycle that we 101 00:04:46.360 --> 00:04:49.079 are more likely to attract and mate and all that? 102 00:04:49.240 --> 00:04:50.839 Do we look for full moons like where. 103 00:04:50.680 --> 00:04:55.639 We tend to get more, we tend to get more lonely. Actually, 104 00:04:55.639 --> 00:04:57.680 at the full moon, people tend to get a little 105 00:04:57.720 --> 00:05:01.959 bit more wanting to find out, find some kind of 106 00:05:02.000 --> 00:05:05.439 extra stimulation, some kind of entertainment. And that is to 107 00:05:05.480 --> 00:05:10.000 do with the lunar influence. So you know what astrology 108 00:05:10.279 --> 00:05:13.040 and astronomy I look at the as twin sciences. If 109 00:05:13.040 --> 00:05:15.800 you want to disprove astrology, you have to disprove the 110 00:05:15.839 --> 00:05:18.639 pull of the moon, because that's astrological. You want to 111 00:05:18.639 --> 00:05:22.319 disprove astrology then you have to disprove the getting a suntan. 112 00:05:22.560 --> 00:05:24.920 That's astrology as you're going out and get the influence 113 00:05:24.959 --> 00:05:27.439 of the sun. Just the influence of Mars and Venus. 114 00:05:27.480 --> 00:05:28.800 You know, it's a quote a famous book. 115 00:05:29.600 --> 00:05:30.759 We've had them on the podcast. 116 00:05:31.040 --> 00:05:33.800 Those influences are a bit more subtle. So one of 117 00:05:33.839 --> 00:05:36.360 them is more red, more to do with iron. One 118 00:05:36.480 --> 00:05:39.079 is more to do with acid, that's the red the Mars. 119 00:05:39.480 --> 00:05:41.720 The other is more copper, or to do with venus, 120 00:05:41.839 --> 00:05:45.000 more to do with the nurturing aspect. So the real powers, 121 00:05:45.040 --> 00:05:47.879 the red and the blue. You could look at it 122 00:05:48.000 --> 00:05:49.519 like the acid and the alkali. 123 00:05:50.240 --> 00:05:50.560 You know. 124 00:05:50.639 --> 00:05:54.399 So these two things, they have an innate attraction to 125 00:05:54.560 --> 00:05:59.759 each other. And so that's built in to our human systems. 126 00:06:00.160 --> 00:06:02.399 Because you are aware of this and you study this 127 00:06:02.480 --> 00:06:07.519 order every encounter, conversation, new interaction. Are you always thinking 128 00:06:07.519 --> 00:06:09.160 about it? Are you always aware of it? Are you 129 00:06:09.240 --> 00:06:11.240 trying to read another person or how you feel? 130 00:06:11.560 --> 00:06:13.360 Always aware of the energetic aspect? 131 00:06:13.560 --> 00:06:13.879 You are? 132 00:06:14.000 --> 00:06:15.879 Yeah, like right now there's an energy exchange. 133 00:06:16.319 --> 00:06:17.639 Okay, yeah, okay. 134 00:06:17.879 --> 00:06:21.519 What we're doing is we're finding we're finding a third power. 135 00:06:21.920 --> 00:06:24.319 I think of that love is a third power. Okay, 136 00:06:24.360 --> 00:06:26.240 So the man doesn't fall in love with the woman 137 00:06:26.360 --> 00:06:27.439 or the woman with the man. 138 00:06:27.319 --> 00:06:29.759 They conversation has an ion, Yes. 139 00:06:29.680 --> 00:06:33.439 Exactly can they fall in love with what happens between them? 140 00:06:33.480 --> 00:06:35.720 So that's the third power. So I think love is 141 00:06:35.720 --> 00:06:37.800 the third force. If you think of the man like 142 00:06:37.839 --> 00:06:40.839 the number one, right, the woman like the number two. Well, 143 00:06:40.879 --> 00:06:43.480 there's a third power that actually is the glue that 144 00:06:43.519 --> 00:06:46.040 holds them together. And if the glue isn't strong, they 145 00:06:46.079 --> 00:06:47.000 come apart. 146 00:06:47.240 --> 00:06:50.399 They So I always tell people that before you can 147 00:06:50.480 --> 00:06:53.600 find love, you have to define it for yourself what 148 00:06:53.639 --> 00:06:53.879 it is. 149 00:06:53.959 --> 00:06:55.399 You know what you're looking for, you know what you feel. 150 00:06:55.600 --> 00:06:58.000 Do you have a definition of what love is? 151 00:06:58.360 --> 00:07:02.040 Oh, it would go through a seven seven stages. 152 00:07:01.879 --> 00:07:03.600 Actually, which I'm sure is in the book. 153 00:07:04.720 --> 00:07:08.600 Seven Phases of Love. The first level would be that 154 00:07:08.680 --> 00:07:12.120 level of ionic attraction between two people. They haven't even 155 00:07:12.160 --> 00:07:15.240 spoken to each other, and what actually happens is their 156 00:07:15.439 --> 00:07:18.600 energy fields interact. That's why you can go into like 157 00:07:18.600 --> 00:07:21.120 one hundred people in a room. And the way I 158 00:07:21.120 --> 00:07:23.199 think of it, everybody's on a certain color, like it 159 00:07:23.279 --> 00:07:26.800 said all blue, but you're say red, and you're standing 160 00:07:26.800 --> 00:07:30.079 in the corner another red person walks in and somehow 161 00:07:30.079 --> 00:07:32.959 the eyes meet, energy flashes across the room, like I 162 00:07:33.000 --> 00:07:35.120 have to talk to that person because there are on 163 00:07:35.120 --> 00:07:37.759 the same frequency. So the first level of love is 164 00:07:37.800 --> 00:07:40.759 attraction because of being on the same frequency, and that 165 00:07:40.800 --> 00:07:42.959 would be the first thing, and then it moves on 166 00:07:43.160 --> 00:07:47.480 from there and moves into love being much more something, 167 00:07:47.519 --> 00:07:50.879 which is the agreed mutual purpose that two people share. 168 00:07:51.720 --> 00:07:54.480 So this would kind of move through the move through 169 00:07:54.519 --> 00:07:59.199 the seven levels. The most the mostation, io, yes it does. 170 00:08:00.199 --> 00:08:04.399 The most basic attraction is your sort of physical attraction. 171 00:08:04.639 --> 00:08:08.600 You almost say, it's the animalistic attraction between male and female. 172 00:08:08.920 --> 00:08:13.480 That's your fundamental male female attraction. But that doesn't last. 173 00:08:13.519 --> 00:08:15.759 People will sing songs about it. I love you forever 174 00:08:15.879 --> 00:08:19.519 and forever, but it's over after a year. Why because 175 00:08:19.560 --> 00:08:21.600 it's only short term. It's like that lunar thing. 176 00:08:21.759 --> 00:08:23.759 It has to be something more substantive. 177 00:08:24.000 --> 00:08:26.800 Yeah, that, and that even works at our cellular level. 178 00:08:26.920 --> 00:08:29.839 Because if the love is only skin deep and it's 179 00:08:29.839 --> 00:08:32.559 all based on the way the other person looks, well, 180 00:08:32.639 --> 00:08:34.279 the face in the mirror is not going to look 181 00:08:34.279 --> 00:08:35.440 the same after thirty. 182 00:08:35.200 --> 00:08:37.080 Years, no, if not, and your eyes might not see 183 00:08:37.080 --> 00:08:37.759 them the same way. 184 00:08:38.000 --> 00:08:42.120 Yeah, emotional filters that can change the way people look 185 00:08:42.240 --> 00:08:43.679 or how the way you feel about how they look. 186 00:08:43.960 --> 00:08:44.600 I agree. 187 00:08:45.200 --> 00:08:47.480 Are there things people can do? Say you go out 188 00:08:47.519 --> 00:08:48.879 you brought up being in a room with one hundred 189 00:08:48.919 --> 00:08:54.200 people to enhance your energy or in your ability to 190 00:08:54.200 --> 00:08:56.919 pick up on other people who see who is able 191 00:08:56.960 --> 00:09:00.840 to be engaged with you know? Or is it just 192 00:09:01.720 --> 00:09:03.320 it won't happen until you connect. 193 00:09:04.000 --> 00:09:06.480 It happens when you connect. But the first thing is 194 00:09:07.519 --> 00:09:11.200 being comfortable in your own skin, being authentic. Like if 195 00:09:11.200 --> 00:09:13.799 you're putting on a show, the other person's going to 196 00:09:13.799 --> 00:09:16.039 see the show and that they need to meet the 197 00:09:16.080 --> 00:09:19.840 face behind the face. So it's actually been. 198 00:09:20.120 --> 00:09:21.879 And a lot of people aren't comfortable with the face 199 00:09:21.919 --> 00:09:24.279 behind the face, or they're not even sure what the 200 00:09:24.320 --> 00:09:26.159 face is behind the face because they're always putting on 201 00:09:26.200 --> 00:09:26.519 a show. 202 00:09:27.320 --> 00:09:28.799 A lot of people know how to hide. 203 00:09:29.200 --> 00:09:32.679 And those relationships don't tend to last. Or you end 204 00:09:32.759 --> 00:09:34.600 up with two people both putting on a show for 205 00:09:34.639 --> 00:09:38.559 each other, and they may have a third interest that 206 00:09:38.639 --> 00:09:42.679 keeps together. That's like economics, so called power couple. They'll 207 00:09:42.759 --> 00:09:48.799 keep together for an energy vibration that's not particularly fine vibration, 208 00:09:49.000 --> 00:09:50.799 so This is where we get to early there's seven 209 00:09:50.840 --> 00:09:55.519 different levels of vibration, and so when there's the lower vibration, 210 00:09:55.679 --> 00:09:57.879 you can have two people. You can have a couple 211 00:09:58.000 --> 00:10:01.559 together for crime, and that will be agreed purpose. But 212 00:10:01.600 --> 00:10:03.919 it's a very low body and Clyde very low. 213 00:10:04.000 --> 00:10:07.840 But are they together because of the the rush. 214 00:10:07.679 --> 00:10:09.480 The stimulate, the gain of the crime. 215 00:10:09.559 --> 00:10:11.200 The crime is just sort of the vehicle, but they 216 00:10:11.279 --> 00:10:13.840 want that adrenaline of the keeper. 217 00:10:13.679 --> 00:10:16.320 Something gotten together in the first place, right then they 218 00:10:16.320 --> 00:10:20.080 find that's their common denominator. You get two people together 219 00:10:20.159 --> 00:10:24.120 for political purpose and they find that's their common denominator. 220 00:10:24.600 --> 00:10:27.320 So this is kind of again climbing the levels. You 221 00:10:27.320 --> 00:10:30.559 get two professors together. They're together because they've got an 222 00:10:30.600 --> 00:10:34.480 intellectual common denominator. But when you get into the higher levels, 223 00:10:34.519 --> 00:10:37.559 you actually get to people who are able to be 224 00:10:38.480 --> 00:10:41.840 natural with each other and producing more. I call it 225 00:10:41.879 --> 00:10:47.039 evolutionary energy. Spirituals the word these mostly use these spiritual relationship. 226 00:10:47.600 --> 00:10:50.240 It goes beyond soulmates. We get the odia of soulmates. 227 00:10:50.519 --> 00:10:53.840 It's more to being spiritual kin. They're akin to each 228 00:10:53.879 --> 00:10:57.720 other rather than soulmates. Soulmates is a kind of lower 229 00:10:57.799 --> 00:11:01.639 turn doesn't last. Virtual kin that can last right the 230 00:11:01.679 --> 00:11:06.600 way through the life, spiritual kin, right the long lasting relationship. 231 00:11:06.679 --> 00:11:08.600 This is fascinating. I have a million questions. I'm sure 232 00:11:08.600 --> 00:11:10.799 my audience do. It does too. I take a quick 233 00:11:10.840 --> 00:11:11.759 break so we. 234 00:11:11.720 --> 00:11:14.480 Can let our sponsors have some positive vibration here. I'm 235 00:11:14.519 --> 00:11:17.799 with David Francis. We will be back right after this, 236 00:11:21.200 --> 00:11:23.879 and we are back. Is there a way to change 237 00:11:23.919 --> 00:11:27.279 your frequency or vibration to turn it up? Turn it 238 00:11:27.320 --> 00:11:31.120 down for somebody who's introverted extroverted? Is that tie into 239 00:11:31.279 --> 00:11:33.080 what you're putting out into the world. 240 00:11:33.279 --> 00:11:38.120 Yes. And what that comes to is, again, it's that 241 00:11:38.200 --> 00:11:41.639 dynamic of being authentic, being the author of yourself. So 242 00:11:41.679 --> 00:11:44.799 that's where that authentic, that word connects to being your 243 00:11:44.840 --> 00:11:48.120 own author, making your own portrait. So that's to do 244 00:11:48.279 --> 00:11:52.639 with the dynamic of human development, personal development, personal growth. 245 00:11:53.159 --> 00:11:56.679 So if you want to attract new people in your 246 00:11:56.720 --> 00:11:59.480 life of a higher vibration, you need to lift your 247 00:11:59.480 --> 00:12:02.639 own level of vibration to be able to do that. 248 00:12:02.639 --> 00:12:05.240 That's where I wrote a book on relationships. But the 249 00:12:05.279 --> 00:12:07.039 other book I wrote it's called Go with the Glow, 250 00:12:07.480 --> 00:12:10.960 and that is about enhancing the level of vibration of yourself, 251 00:12:11.480 --> 00:12:13.879 and that's the first thing to do. It's like, how 252 00:12:14.320 --> 00:12:17.399 does a bird attract a mate sings its own song 253 00:12:18.159 --> 00:12:19.879 if it's not singing its own song. If you get 254 00:12:19.879 --> 00:12:23.159 a blackbird pretending to be a chaffinch, right, it ain't 255 00:12:23.159 --> 00:12:24.480 going to attract nothing. 256 00:12:24.679 --> 00:12:26.320 So the bird thing is some time has a level 257 00:12:26.480 --> 00:12:28.840 of confidence and self awareness. 258 00:12:28.360 --> 00:12:30.159 That is attractive to something else. 259 00:12:31.000 --> 00:12:33.440 So so many people and a lot of our audience 260 00:12:33.600 --> 00:12:39.000 is at best wounded, at worse severely damaged by past 261 00:12:39.039 --> 00:12:42.000 relationships that didn't work at hour, how do they shed 262 00:12:42.039 --> 00:12:46.600 that bit of skin and put that positive energy out 263 00:12:46.720 --> 00:12:48.519 so other people be attracted to it, so you're not 264 00:12:48.559 --> 00:12:51.600 always leading with the fear or the pain. 265 00:12:52.000 --> 00:12:55.639 Yeah, that's a key, key dynamic. That's the idea of woundology. 266 00:12:55.679 --> 00:12:58.679 It's been called to people attracted and it's a valid thing. 267 00:12:58.759 --> 00:13:01.360 Two people share the same wounds and they come together. 268 00:13:01.759 --> 00:13:04.240 Usually that relationship lasts for as long as it takes 269 00:13:04.240 --> 00:13:06.720 and to work through the wounds, and that's the reason. 270 00:13:06.799 --> 00:13:09.200 So if one works it through quicker, that's the waiting. 271 00:13:09.600 --> 00:13:11.879 Yeah, but they can work through the wounds and get 272 00:13:11.919 --> 00:13:15.600 to a positively healing place. If there's an understanding of 273 00:13:16.039 --> 00:13:19.480 you have childhood trauma, you have pain from your divorce 274 00:13:19.600 --> 00:13:21.320 or whatever, and you know, let's. 275 00:13:21.240 --> 00:13:22.159 Get through this together. 276 00:13:22.240 --> 00:13:24.200 You know, there's a lot of people, you know, in 277 00:13:24.240 --> 00:13:26.360 the relationship space are always like you need to be 278 00:13:26.480 --> 00:13:29.919 a complete person before you can attract somebody else. There's 279 00:13:29.919 --> 00:13:31.840 no such thing as a complete person. I mean, we're all, 280 00:13:32.720 --> 00:13:34.759 you know, bodies in motion. 281 00:13:35.519 --> 00:13:36.519 We're all working progress. 282 00:13:36.559 --> 00:13:37.799 We're all working progress. 283 00:13:37.840 --> 00:13:39.679 You know, somebody said, what would you if you had 284 00:13:39.679 --> 00:13:41.360 to write an autobography, what's the title of your book? 285 00:13:41.399 --> 00:13:44.039 Work in progress? I agree, and you want that. 286 00:13:44.639 --> 00:13:47.159 Yeah, So two people are coming together and they're prepared 287 00:13:47.240 --> 00:13:50.399 and they're working. They have work in progress together. That's 288 00:13:50.399 --> 00:13:54.440 the key to a long lasting, successful relationship, right, rather 289 00:13:54.519 --> 00:13:58.720 than going, well, I love you as you are, don't change. Well, 290 00:13:58.759 --> 00:14:02.399 that's that's really not a good basis for relationship because 291 00:14:02.440 --> 00:14:04.240 you want to be working together. 292 00:14:04.320 --> 00:14:06.480 You're on a journey with them exactly. You have to 293 00:14:06.480 --> 00:14:07.159 give them space. 294 00:14:07.320 --> 00:14:09.639 You also have to give them boundaries and there's ways 295 00:14:09.639 --> 00:14:13.559 that you kind of go towards something together, which is 296 00:14:13.960 --> 00:14:16.720 hopefully you know, a lifetime of happiness. Where do you 297 00:14:16.759 --> 00:14:20.279 stand if somebody said, there says to the phrase opposites attract. 298 00:14:20.519 --> 00:14:21.720 But that is also true. 299 00:14:21.919 --> 00:14:23.360 Oh, that is also true. 300 00:14:23.440 --> 00:14:28.600 And why both are true? If someone as an example, 301 00:14:28.600 --> 00:14:30.799 there's the idea of being attracted to someone on the 302 00:14:30.799 --> 00:14:33.279 other side of the tracks, that old idea, right, So 303 00:14:33.759 --> 00:14:36.600 if someone has been suppressing something in their energy field 304 00:14:36.919 --> 00:14:39.279 and they've been pushing it down, then it ends up 305 00:14:39.320 --> 00:14:42.000 being like a ball of energy in their field that 306 00:14:42.039 --> 00:14:45.480 will attract something else that's like itself. So it will 307 00:14:45.519 --> 00:14:49.039 actually attract something which is opposite to what other people 308 00:14:49.159 --> 00:14:52.759 might even expect. So it is the case opposite is attract. 309 00:14:52.879 --> 00:14:56.399 And also things which are I call it same same 310 00:14:56.480 --> 00:14:59.200 with each other, they attract, so both can be true. 311 00:14:59.200 --> 00:15:02.000 The ones that tend to last are actually the ones 312 00:15:02.039 --> 00:15:05.799 that there's a shared purpose. So they're looking together into 313 00:15:06.039 --> 00:15:10.240 a third I call it a third power. So and 314 00:15:10.320 --> 00:15:13.399 it can be the most common one in relationships that 315 00:15:13.559 --> 00:15:17.080 lasts for twenty eight years plus. It is children. So 316 00:15:17.159 --> 00:15:19.879 the glue that holds the relationship together is the fact 317 00:15:19.919 --> 00:15:23.519 that they're both focused in on the child, right, which also. 318 00:15:23.279 --> 00:15:26.720 Is that's a different kind of a relationship, though there's 319 00:15:26.759 --> 00:15:28.879 a coul parenting in a way, and a lot of 320 00:15:28.919 --> 00:15:32.279 times the parents stay together because of the children and 321 00:15:32.440 --> 00:15:35.639 a lot of the you know, the chemistry, vibration, whatever 322 00:15:35.679 --> 00:15:36.600 you want to talk about is. 323 00:15:37.120 --> 00:15:38.159 Either gone or different. 324 00:15:38.399 --> 00:15:39.120 Yes, it's different. 325 00:15:39.120 --> 00:15:40.799 You go from husband, wife to mom and dad. It's 326 00:15:40.879 --> 00:15:41.559 different energy. 327 00:15:41.639 --> 00:15:44.600 You go from silver, which is like the engagement ring 328 00:15:44.639 --> 00:15:47.960 is silver, the wedding ring is gold. Okay, silver is 329 00:15:48.000 --> 00:15:51.000 the new fresh. Wow, this is amazing, this is just starting. 330 00:15:51.039 --> 00:15:53.360 We start with a silver spoon in our mouth and 331 00:15:53.399 --> 00:15:56.039 we end up with our golden years. So we go 332 00:15:56.120 --> 00:15:59.840 from something which is more electric, electrifying, to something which 333 00:15:59.879 --> 00:16:02.759 is you can say, more magnetic. So we go from 334 00:16:02.799 --> 00:16:05.879 the silver at the beginning of the rainbow, silver flash 335 00:16:05.879 --> 00:16:08.679 at the beginning. We go through our spectrum journey of life, 336 00:16:09.080 --> 00:16:11.159 and then we end up in the with the pot 337 00:16:11.159 --> 00:16:14.559 of gold. And so marriage is more moving into the 338 00:16:14.559 --> 00:16:17.080 Over time, you still want to keep the silver alive. 339 00:16:17.399 --> 00:16:19.679 It's got more and more a magnetic hold to it. 340 00:16:20.159 --> 00:16:23.080 So after twenty eight years or so, it can be 341 00:16:23.399 --> 00:16:26.159 that the children leave, the parents look at each other 342 00:16:26.240 --> 00:16:29.320 and kind of go, we're not really into each other anymore, right, 343 00:16:30.080 --> 00:16:32.559 and it comes apart, And there's nothing wrong with that. 344 00:16:32.840 --> 00:16:36.679 It's simply the natural cycle. They've moved in different directions. 345 00:16:36.759 --> 00:16:41.679 Beautiful word, because being indifferent to somebody moving in different directions, 346 00:16:42.000 --> 00:16:46.559 that's actually more how I see relationships divorce than a 347 00:16:46.600 --> 00:16:48.399 big bouts of anger and all the rest of it. 348 00:16:48.639 --> 00:16:51.759 When two people become indifferent to each other, that's much 349 00:16:51.799 --> 00:16:56.440 more telling in terms of the relationship. Is it's kind, 350 00:16:56.559 --> 00:16:58.799 it's cooling. Put it that way, a. 351 00:16:58.759 --> 00:17:01.039 Very expensive English degree. I've learned more in the last 352 00:17:01.480 --> 00:17:04.559 half hour here than I ever have. I didn't even 353 00:17:04.599 --> 00:17:05.599 think about that that way. 354 00:17:05.920 --> 00:17:09.599 What are are there things somebody can do if they're 355 00:17:09.680 --> 00:17:11.920 if they're not feeling at their best, or if they're 356 00:17:13.400 --> 00:17:16.599 skeptical or fearful of getting out there and getting a relationship, 357 00:17:16.640 --> 00:17:19.359 that can can change their energy to put it back 358 00:17:19.400 --> 00:17:21.079 out there. Obviously, you know you want to always try 359 00:17:21.079 --> 00:17:22.720 and be your best self, but that might take a 360 00:17:22.759 --> 00:17:23.200 long time. 361 00:17:23.519 --> 00:17:26.960 Let's let's give a practical example. Happened And when I 362 00:17:27.000 --> 00:17:29.799 had a client in New York and he wanted to 363 00:17:29.839 --> 00:17:31.640 be in a relationship in a single man for a 364 00:17:31.680 --> 00:17:34.599 long time. And I visited him in his house and 365 00:17:34.640 --> 00:17:37.079 I pointed out, I looked around the place, everything in 366 00:17:37.160 --> 00:17:40.039 the place was there was a single person on the 367 00:17:39.880 --> 00:17:45.200 in the artwork, there was a singular bird, little statue 368 00:17:45.200 --> 00:17:46.440 on everything was single. 369 00:17:46.920 --> 00:17:48.359 So I said, well, look, party of one. 370 00:17:48.559 --> 00:17:52.119 Yeah, first thing is change the take call. Put put 371 00:17:52.200 --> 00:17:54.480 things that have got too man and a woman, man 372 00:17:54.519 --> 00:17:57.240 and a woman. And within actually a few months, he 373 00:17:57.359 --> 00:18:00.920 was in a relationship. It made a difference because he 374 00:18:01.079 --> 00:18:03.559 was changing what was on the outside, right, So then 375 00:18:03.680 --> 00:18:06.319 changed what was on the inside, right. I mean telling 376 00:18:06.359 --> 00:18:09.400 someone just change yourself, that's a pretty hard thing to 377 00:18:09.400 --> 00:18:12.359 do because they've got to go straight within. But changed 378 00:18:12.359 --> 00:18:14.960 the environment, changed the environment, and that sends a new 379 00:18:15.039 --> 00:18:17.599 message back to the inside. So he started to. 380 00:18:17.559 --> 00:18:19.880 Put a pair of pads things. 381 00:18:19.920 --> 00:18:21.400 Yeah, everything was passed. 382 00:18:21.200 --> 00:18:25.039 And so either subliminally or even overtly, people pick up 383 00:18:25.039 --> 00:18:26.759 on that, like, oh, this is a this is a. 384 00:18:26.720 --> 00:18:27.240 House of two. 385 00:18:27.440 --> 00:18:28.480 He changed his energy. 386 00:18:28.799 --> 00:18:30.400 Yeah, a lot of people are very used to to 387 00:18:32.599 --> 00:18:33.240 being a one. 388 00:18:33.519 --> 00:18:38.759 And uh I remember years ago my girlfriend, she'd been 389 00:18:38.799 --> 00:18:41.559 single a long time, and we started dating, and we 390 00:18:41.559 --> 00:18:44.960 were at some event and somebody was like calling, as 391 00:18:45.240 --> 00:18:49.640 is anybody here alone or and her her instinct was like, oh, 392 00:18:49.720 --> 00:18:52.319 I'm that person. I'm like, we've been dating for years here. 393 00:18:53.319 --> 00:18:55.079 But it was just the way she was wired as 394 00:18:55.160 --> 00:18:57.240 a as a one and you have to shift over 395 00:18:57.279 --> 00:18:59.039 into being a two. And a lot of ways you 396 00:18:59.079 --> 00:19:02.119 can do that is sort of put your put it 397 00:19:02.160 --> 00:19:04.680 out there to the universe that there's a possibility of 398 00:19:05.000 --> 00:19:05.880 coupling in here. 399 00:19:06.000 --> 00:19:08.920 Agreed. So especially in the West, like in the East, 400 00:19:08.960 --> 00:19:11.400 they kind of say go within and change, But in 401 00:19:11.440 --> 00:19:13.839