WEBVTT

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<v Speaker 1>I think before we give second chances, you have to

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<v Speaker 1>see receipts. A lot of women would be saved by

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<v Speaker 1>men coming back into their life just to do the

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<v Speaker 1>same thing that they did which was the cause of

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<v Speaker 1>them breaking up. A lot of women would be saved

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<v Speaker 1>from this if they asked for change behavior and receipts

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<v Speaker 1>and being more intentional before they committed to the second chance. Baby,

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<v Speaker 1>before you commit to the second chance, you tell him

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<v Speaker 1>show me what's gonna be different. Not tell me show

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<v Speaker 1>me what's gonna be different. I want to see it

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<v Speaker 1>with my own two eyes. So if he's committed to

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<v Speaker 1>making this long distance things work when he was originally

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<v Speaker 1>not open to the long distance and he kind of

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<v Speaker 1>freaked out about it, he should be on the plane

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<v Speaker 1>Jet Blue, United American Southwest Delta Pick one Frontier. Did

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<v Speaker 1>I say that, pick one? If he's now committed to

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<v Speaker 1>the long distance and he's gonna do everything to make

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<v Speaker 1>it work, see the receipts. Hey, y'all, welcome back to

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<v Speaker 1>there to see it. I know y'all noticed my little

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<v Speaker 1>I know you notice the set change.

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<v Speaker 2>You know.

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<v Speaker 1>I really want y'all to know that I am committed

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<v Speaker 1>to my episodes when I don't have an episode and

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<v Speaker 1>I have to take a break or there's some type

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<v Speaker 1>of mishap and I'm not able to get an episode

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<v Speaker 1>out to y'all, it makes me very very very sad.

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<v Speaker 1>So we've had some scheduling things happening, and I said,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm not going without an episode. We're gonna do it

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<v Speaker 1>in my house. Please don't know, Please don't ever say

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<v Speaker 1>I never did anything for y'all. Please don't ever say

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<v Speaker 1>I'm not committed to my craft. Okay, we're doing it, baby,

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<v Speaker 1>right here in my living room. So take a seat,

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<v Speaker 1>get into it. Okay, get czy. Anyways, anyways, anyways, anyways,

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<v Speaker 1>all right, So we have some subscription reminders. Follow dear

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<v Speaker 1>to see a podcast on Apple and Spotify and leave

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<v Speaker 1>a five star review, not two, not three, baby, not four,

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<v Speaker 1>five star review on Apple and Spotify. Then I want

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<v Speaker 1>you to subscribe to my channel. Shout out to ten

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<v Speaker 1>thousand followers, y'all. I knew it would get that. Let

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<v Speaker 1>me tell you this, sometimes people don't get you. Gotta

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<v Speaker 1>have some gritting, you, right, you gotta have you gotta

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<v Speaker 1>be able to climb the mountain. You gotta have My friend,

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<v Speaker 1>you said this, the other day he said, you gotta

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<v Speaker 1>have your arm, your palm on the plow. Okay, you

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<v Speaker 1>gotta be willing to do it to work. And you know,

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<v Speaker 1>it took us a little It took us a little while.

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<v Speaker 1>But I am so glad that we are here. Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>I am so glad that we are here. Let's see closer.

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<v Speaker 1>I think that's better. Okay, y'all. Now, y'all bear with

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<v Speaker 1>me because you know this is my first time basically

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<v Speaker 1>filming myself. So bear with me, right, Gotta adjust, gotta adjust,

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<v Speaker 1>all right. So thank y'all so much for ten thousand subscribers.

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<v Speaker 1>We're hoping to hit twenty k. Now, so tell your friends,

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<v Speaker 1>and tell a friends and tell a friend. If you

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<v Speaker 1>are enjoying dear to see a please like, subscribe, comment

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<v Speaker 1>on my YouTube channel the videos. I'm always in the comments,

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<v Speaker 1>so please please please continue to do that. Okay, y'all.

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<v Speaker 1>I want to get into this is actually one of

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<v Speaker 1>my favorite parts because I always am so grateful that

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<v Speaker 1>y'all are watching, right, and that y'all actually leave reviews.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't think we talk about that as creators and

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<v Speaker 1>as leaders in this space. That man like the engagement

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<v Speaker 1>is so amazing. Right, So here's one of my reviews,

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<v Speaker 1>five star pod. Oh have you already talk to me? Nice? Okay?

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<v Speaker 1>Mia Orlando said five stars. If you're not listening, you

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<v Speaker 1>need to be to see it speaks nothing but facts,

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<v Speaker 1>nothing but facts. Use what she says and you'll upgrade

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<v Speaker 1>your life. I look forward to Monday every week. Ah.

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<v Speaker 1>That blessed me. That bless me. Now I'm not telling

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<v Speaker 1>you what I heard. I'm telling you what I know,

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<v Speaker 1>and this podcast absolutely will upgrade your life period. Now

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<v Speaker 1>we're gonna jump on into our voicemails. Y'all, let's jump

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<v Speaker 1>on into our voicemails. The title of it is he

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<v Speaker 1>changed his mind about long distance, then came back two

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<v Speaker 1>weeks later. All right, let's.

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<v Speaker 2>See dare to see it. I'm gonna try to make

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<v Speaker 2>this queak because I would really love to hear from you.

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<v Speaker 2>I started talking and getting to this guy three months ago.

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<v Speaker 2>For reference, we are both in la twenties, long distance

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<v Speaker 2>to four hours by the way, and we were not

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<v Speaker 2>sexually active. He has made efforts to travel to me

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<v Speaker 2>within the three months, and we've spent several days hanging

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<v Speaker 2>out three months. In one the new he asks if

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<v Speaker 2>I want a relationship, I said yes. Then specifically, if

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<v Speaker 2>I would want a relationship with him again, I said yes.

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<v Speaker 1>Of course, up.

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<v Speaker 2>Until this point everything was going well, the communication and intention,

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<v Speaker 2>so this took me by surprise. Later on that same day,

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<v Speaker 2>he said he wanted to talk to me, and basically

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<v Speaker 2>he said he was thinking logically and that he was

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<v Speaker 2>having issues committing to being long distance because when he

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<v Speaker 2>did it with the girl from his past, it took

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<v Speaker 2>a toll on him having to find a place to

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<v Speaker 2>stay by, food to eat, and pay for a flight,

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<v Speaker 2>and he wants to be able to take care of

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<v Speaker 2>his lady. He also said he wouldn't be happy in

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<v Speaker 2>a long distance relationship. He would love to be with

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<v Speaker 2>me basically because everything else checked out for him.

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<v Speaker 3>Just that.

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<v Speaker 2>I was understanding a bit because he has been looking

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<v Speaker 2>for a job, but also confused with everything going well

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<v Speaker 2>up until that, and confused because he didn't try to

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<v Speaker 2>have a conversation about that before springing that on me.

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<v Speaker 2>A conversations were more soul planning for future meets and trips.

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<v Speaker 2>I in no way expected him to do all the

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<v Speaker 2>work by hisself, and with everything he was telling me,

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<v Speaker 2>he didn't really say outright, but he kept saying that

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<v Speaker 2>it was hard to commit, but he would still love

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<v Speaker 2>to continue to get to know me. Said my farewells,

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<v Speaker 2>and I cut him off. Two weeks later, he calls.

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<v Speaker 2>He's saying he's sorry, he's had time to think, he's

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<v Speaker 2>made a mistake. He loves her, and he was worried

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<v Speaker 2>about getting hurt. He wants to be with me.

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<v Speaker 1>I asked what.

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<v Speaker 2>Would be the difference with being in a long distance

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<v Speaker 2>relationship now. He said he's willing to do whatever it

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<v Speaker 2>takes and that something will have to plan. So honestly,

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<v Speaker 2>I believe I have my answer because I'm not to

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<v Speaker 2>be playing with but I love to hear what you think.

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<v Speaker 1>Let me say this first of all, Bravo, bravo, because

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<v Speaker 1>the way that you handle this is baby, that's to

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<v Speaker 1>see away all day. When a man tells you where

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<v Speaker 1>he stands with you, when he tells you what position

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<v Speaker 1>he wants to play in your life, everything after that

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<v Speaker 1>must must follow through accordingly, right. And the way that

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<v Speaker 1>you handled that was that he said that he didn't

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<v Speaker 1>know what he wanted to do and where he wanted

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<v Speaker 1>to be with you, and he had so many things

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<v Speaker 1>going on, and you said, thank you for sharing that

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<v Speaker 1>with me. I'm cool off of you. And the important

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<v Speaker 1>part is that when he circles back around, because they

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<v Speaker 1>always do, right, he circled back around. Ladies, set your

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<v Speaker 1>boundaries and make them firm and strong. When you set

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<v Speaker 1>boundaries and you are in a position when you communicate

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<v Speaker 1>to a man, I'm good if you do, I'm good

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<v Speaker 1>if you don't. These men are so attracted to that

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<v Speaker 1>it's almost like they it becomes another challenge for them.

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<v Speaker 1>Right when a man is telling you that he needs

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<v Speaker 1>space or that he doesn't know if it's going to

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<v Speaker 1>be a fit, and then you need an explanation or

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<v Speaker 1>you want to ask him why not this, or why

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<v Speaker 1>why didn't you tell me this? Baby? You handled that

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<v Speaker 1>so smooth, You should do exactly what this young lady did.

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<v Speaker 1>She basically was like, thank you for sharing that with me.

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<v Speaker 1>That is not in alignment with what I want right now,

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<v Speaker 1>and she walked away and guess who came back around

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<v Speaker 1>two weeks later. Bravo, baby, bravo. Now I'll answer your

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<v Speaker 1>actual question at him. Your actual question at hand is

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<v Speaker 1>more so, what to do now that he's come back

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<v Speaker 1>in these two weeks. Let me say this. I think

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<v Speaker 1>before we give second chances, you have to see receipts.

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<v Speaker 1>A lot of women would be saved by men coming

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<v Speaker 1>back into their life just to do the same thing

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<v Speaker 1>that they did which was the cause of them breaking up.

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<v Speaker 1>A lot of women would be saved from this if

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<v Speaker 1>they asked for change behavior and receipts and being more

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<v Speaker 1>intentional before they committed to the second chance. Baby. But

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<v Speaker 1>before you commit to the second chance, you tell him,

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<v Speaker 1>show me what's gonna be different. Not tell me. Show

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<v Speaker 1>me what's gonna be different. I want to see it

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<v Speaker 1>with my own two eyes. So if he's committed to

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<v Speaker 1>making this long distance things work when he was originally

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<v Speaker 1>not open to the long distance and he kind of

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<v Speaker 1>freaked out about it, he should be on a plane

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<v Speaker 1>Blue United American Southwest Delta Pick one Frontier. Did I

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<v Speaker 1>say that? Pick one? If he's now committed to the

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<v Speaker 1>long distance and he's gonna do everything to make it work,

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<v Speaker 1>see the receipts. You should tell him that you are

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<v Speaker 1>grateful that he communicated his emotions to you. You are

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<v Speaker 1>open to staying in connection with him, and I would

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<v Speaker 1>like to see how it would be different before I commit.

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<v Speaker 1>Give me the receipts. I want to see. Give me

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<v Speaker 1>the receipts. I don't want to give you a second

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<v Speaker 1>chance unless I see the change behavior. And so it

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<v Speaker 1>sounds like you're slightly open to it. And I actually

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<v Speaker 1>like how he held himself accountable and he was vulnerable

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<v Speaker 1>in telling you. Damn, babe, I freaked out. I freaked out.

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<v Speaker 1>I got a little scared, right, And now I really

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<v Speaker 1>really really want to commit. Now I'm thinking about this.

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<v Speaker 1>Now I really want to see I think that was awesome,

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<v Speaker 1>and I think that this is a case where I

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<v Speaker 1>would grant a little grace because again, we're not going

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<v Speaker 1>into this foolishly right. We don't have to have our

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<v Speaker 1>guards up because we're gonna see the receipts first. Tell

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<v Speaker 1>him thank you for your vulnerability, Thank you for feeling

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<v Speaker 1>safe enough for to share that with me. I am

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<v Speaker 1>open to connecting with you, but I would like us

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<v Speaker 1>to continue getting to know each other, and I would

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<v Speaker 1>like for you to show me that you are committed

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<v Speaker 1>to a longestant relationship right now. Voicemail number two. This

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<v Speaker 1>one is entitled Let's see. This one is entitled my

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<v Speaker 1>date has a gay roommate? Should that be a red flag,

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<v Speaker 1>let's listen to it? Should that be a red flat?

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<v Speaker 3>Dared to see him. I started dating this guy that

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<v Speaker 3>I met off of a dating app. But I am

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<v Speaker 3>a single mom. He is a single dad, which worked out.

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<v Speaker 3>When we met up. We had a great time. The

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<v Speaker 3>only thing that I am concerned about is that he

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<v Speaker 3>does have a roommate. He sees his child like three

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<v Speaker 3>days out of the week. It's a great profession and

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<v Speaker 3>all the things, but he definitely has a gay roommate.

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<v Speaker 3>He actually thought it was something that bothered me, and

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<v Speaker 3>I immediately acted him, well are you gay? And he

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<v Speaker 3>was like no, of course, not da dada, And clearly

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<v Speaker 3>I'm like, he has a son, you shouldn't be gay, right,

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<v Speaker 3>But then I started asking about future plans and he

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<v Speaker 3>said that he was looking for a new apartment with

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<v Speaker 3>this same roommate. I thought that his situation was circumstantial

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<v Speaker 3>because of the loss of his mom and him just

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<v Speaker 3>needed to find a roommate at the time. However, him

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<v Speaker 3>wanting to go and get a new apartment with this

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<v Speaker 3>guy is kind of sketchy for me, and I really

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<v Speaker 3>don't know how to bring it up. When I asked him, like,

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<v Speaker 3>what are your planning in a year or two. He

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<v Speaker 3>said he wants to find his person and find his

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<v Speaker 3>wife and move in and create a family like that.

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<v Speaker 3>But I am truly turning fear out if I should

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<v Speaker 3>just stop talking him, cut it off, or also and

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<v Speaker 3>if having a gay roommate is a new deal breaker

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<v Speaker 3>for me, because now I don't know what you guys

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<v Speaker 3>are doing at night and what is going on. But however,

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<v Speaker 3>this could also be a straight guy that is literally

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<v Speaker 3>just has a gay roommate. He told me he just

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<v Speaker 3>completely likes the dynamic between two roommates. And I understand

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<v Speaker 3>how hard it is to find a good roommate, but

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<v Speaker 3>I don't know what to do.

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<v Speaker 1>So let so let me say this. I think that

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<v Speaker 1>you have not insinuated that you pick up any kind

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<v Speaker 1>of non straight heterosexual vibes from him, right. I think

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<v Speaker 1>that if you didn't know who his roommate was and

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<v Speaker 1>that he was a gay male, you would probably have

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<v Speaker 1>no issues with this situation at all. Given that, right,

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<v Speaker 1>I think that this actually shows that he is open minded,

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<v Speaker 1>that he's liberal, that he's progressive, that he sees the

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<v Speaker 1>hardened people, that he is somebody that can coexist when

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<v Speaker 1>his lifestyle doesn't meet the other persons. I think that

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<v Speaker 1>this is actually a very green flag. I do not

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<v Speaker 1>believe in walking into a situation with reservations and paranoia,

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<v Speaker 1>and I give people a clean slate. I think that

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<v Speaker 1>in this economy and this political climate, this actually shows

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<v Speaker 1>that this person is very open minded. And let me

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<v Speaker 1>tell you where it's going to be beneficial in your relationship.

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<v Speaker 1>You want somebody who is open minded, not somebody that

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<v Speaker 1>is you know, bends on what they they believe, but

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<v Speaker 1>someone that is open minded and that can understand people's

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<v Speaker 1>perspective and understand people's lifestyle even though it has nothing

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00:14:15.919 --> 00:14:18.320
<v Speaker 1>to do with them, right. I think that that's actually

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<v Speaker 1>a great flag. I think that you know he already

249
00:14:20.600 --> 00:14:22.480
<v Speaker 1>has a child, right, I think you said, y'all both

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00:14:22.519 --> 00:14:25.720
<v Speaker 1>for single parents. So this shows that he is agile.

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<v Speaker 1>This shows that when you have kids with that man,

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<v Speaker 1>and that child maybe doesn't want to go to college,

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<v Speaker 1>is queer of any sort, right, that doesn't go into

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00:14:39.000 --> 00:14:41.519
<v Speaker 1>the career field that his parents want he or she

255
00:14:41.919 --> 00:14:44.399
<v Speaker 1>their parents wanted them to. That this is a This

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00:14:44.600 --> 00:14:47.039
<v Speaker 1>is a man who is going to be open minded

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<v Speaker 1>and that understands that everybody has their walk of life,

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<v Speaker 1>their different walks of life. I personally think that it

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00:14:54.080 --> 00:14:57.919
<v Speaker 1>is a complete green flag to me, in my opinion,

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00:14:58.320 --> 00:15:01.320
<v Speaker 1>I think that it also will rear its head in

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<v Speaker 1>your relationship and in a good way, because there are

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<v Speaker 1>going to be times where you don't agree. There are

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<v Speaker 1>going to be times where you are on two separate

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<v Speaker 1>sides of the fence about this. I think the lifestyle

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<v Speaker 1>that he's living shows that he could meet in the

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<v Speaker 1>middle of the role right, that he can choose the

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00:15:19.840 --> 00:15:23.000
<v Speaker 1>bigger thing at hand without getting into the weeds and everything.

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<v Speaker 1>But you need a man like that that comes into

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<v Speaker 1>play when you are in a relationship and you think

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<v Speaker 1>that it's big and he thinks that it's small, when

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00:15:32.639 --> 00:15:35.039
<v Speaker 1>you think that it's not important and he thinks that

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<v Speaker 1>it is important. Right. It shows that he has a

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00:15:38.159 --> 00:15:43.519
<v Speaker 1>vast perspective on life and he's able to coexist when

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00:15:43.679 --> 00:15:47.320
<v Speaker 1>things are not in direct alignment with him. It also

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<v Speaker 1>shows that he is not he is not afraid to

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<v Speaker 1>be to even be in this perspective he told you.

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<v Speaker 1>It shows that he's not someone who is going to

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<v Speaker 1>be kind of bullied into being called gay or anything

279
00:16:09.720 --> 00:16:12.600
<v Speaker 1>like that. He knows what that could insinuate. And he

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00:16:12.720 --> 00:16:14.759
<v Speaker 1>stood on that and he said, and I'm about to

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00:16:14.840 --> 00:16:18.279
<v Speaker 1>move with him again. I'm about to move with him again.

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<v Speaker 1>I think that that shows that he's able to make

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00:16:22.080 --> 00:16:27.480
<v Speaker 1>connections and have great friendships. He's able to withhold and

284
00:16:28.399 --> 00:16:30.960
<v Speaker 1>living with somebody is not hard, is not easy, right,

285
00:16:31.039 --> 00:16:34.159
<v Speaker 1>It's actually has it's very nuanced, and it has a

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00:16:34.279 --> 00:16:37.440
<v Speaker 1>lot of different dynamics and layers. And so he's been

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00:16:37.559 --> 00:16:40.600
<v Speaker 1>able to be on a schedule with somebody, He's been

288
00:16:40.639 --> 00:16:42.879
<v Speaker 1>able to share a key in a dwelling with someone,

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00:16:42.960 --> 00:16:47.519
<v Speaker 1>He's been able to monitor noise and and working all

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00:16:47.559 --> 00:16:50.639
<v Speaker 1>of these things with someone. Right, This is something that

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00:16:50.799 --> 00:16:53.759
<v Speaker 1>I think will lead into him being a leader, him

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00:16:53.840 --> 00:16:57.200
<v Speaker 1>being a team player, him being someone that you that

293
00:16:57.360 --> 00:17:00.759
<v Speaker 1>is reliable as well. Right. I think think that there's

294
00:17:00.879 --> 00:17:04.880
<v Speaker 1>also a lot of green flags that are in this situation.

295
00:17:05.240 --> 00:17:09.279
<v Speaker 1>And again, you never insinuated that you picked up any

296
00:17:09.440 --> 00:17:13.319
<v Speaker 1>kind of vibes that would insinuate or that would make

297
00:17:13.400 --> 00:17:17.359
<v Speaker 1>you think that he was anything other than a straight man. Right,

298
00:17:20.559 --> 00:17:23.480
<v Speaker 1>I think it's a green flag. Personally, I think it's

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00:17:23.519 --> 00:17:25.640
<v Speaker 1>a green flag. That's what I was trying to say.

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<v Speaker 1>He thinks it shows that he's secure. Why couldn't I

301
00:17:28.599 --> 00:17:31.119
<v Speaker 1>think of that. I had a brain fart. It shows

302
00:17:31.160 --> 00:17:34.759
<v Speaker 1>that he's secure in his masculinity. Now, could there be

303
00:17:34.960 --> 00:17:39.400
<v Speaker 1>other things going on or going or or around doing

304
00:17:40.000 --> 00:17:43.640
<v Speaker 1>They could be doing things, could be, could be, but again,

305
00:17:44.119 --> 00:17:47.319
<v Speaker 1>never veer on the side of paranoia. Could there be

306
00:17:47.839 --> 00:17:53.680
<v Speaker 1>something going on, maybe they've experimented, maybe they're in the math.

307
00:17:54.000 --> 00:17:56.880
<v Speaker 1>It could be, but I personally think that that's maybe

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00:17:56.960 --> 00:17:59.839
<v Speaker 1>a ten percent chance. I think the ninety percent chance

309
00:17:59.880 --> 00:18:01.680
<v Speaker 1>is that this is a man who is secure in

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00:18:01.759 --> 00:18:04.440
<v Speaker 1>his masculinity. This is a man who knows how to

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00:18:04.480 --> 00:18:09.720
<v Speaker 1>coexist with people, and a man who really can be

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00:18:10.119 --> 00:18:15.880
<v Speaker 1>exist in outside of his comfort zone. He can exist

313
00:18:16.000 --> 00:18:18.920
<v Speaker 1>outside of spaces that are not quite in alignment with

314
00:18:19.079 --> 00:18:21.720
<v Speaker 1>who he is. And I think that's quite sexy. Honestly,

315
00:18:22.559 --> 00:18:25.640
<v Speaker 1>if you ask me, I think it's quite sexy. AnyWho.

316
00:18:26.079 --> 00:18:28.720
<v Speaker 1>I hope that helped you. I really hope that helped you. Okay, y'all?

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00:18:28.839 --> 00:18:32.440
<v Speaker 1>Voice smail number three. It's entitled how do I tell

318
00:18:32.599 --> 00:18:36.440
<v Speaker 1>him I still live with my parents? How do I

319
00:18:36.599 --> 00:18:38.799
<v Speaker 1>tell him I still live with my parents? Let's hear

320
00:18:38.839 --> 00:18:45.920
<v Speaker 1>it there to see. Uh, how do you tell a

321
00:18:46.000 --> 00:18:50.160
<v Speaker 1>god that you're dating that you still live with your parents.

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00:18:54.119 --> 00:19:05.920
<v Speaker 1>Let me tell you this. They're you gotta make sure

323
00:19:05.960 --> 00:19:09.240
<v Speaker 1>you're in good company. You telling a man that you

324
00:19:09.359 --> 00:19:14.599
<v Speaker 1>still live with your parents should be an easy lay

325
00:19:14.680 --> 00:19:17.400
<v Speaker 1>for the right man. Why are you still living with

326
00:19:17.480 --> 00:19:22.000
<v Speaker 1>your parents, You're trying to save money, you are going

327
00:19:22.079 --> 00:19:26.200
<v Speaker 1>through a transition, whatever the case may be. That should

328
00:19:26.240 --> 00:19:30.920
<v Speaker 1>be something that is palatable for a man to understand

329
00:19:31.039 --> 00:19:34.319
<v Speaker 1>and know, and if he a real one, he'll take

330
00:19:34.359 --> 00:19:38.720
<v Speaker 1>you up out of there. Okay. It should be absolutely positively,

331
00:19:40.279 --> 00:19:43.400
<v Speaker 1>it should be absolutely okay for you to share with

332
00:19:43.519 --> 00:19:47.680
<v Speaker 1>the man that you still are living with your parents.

333
00:19:48.000 --> 00:19:51.680
<v Speaker 1>For example, my sister is now living with me. If

334
00:19:51.720 --> 00:19:54.680
<v Speaker 1>I met a man today, I would never would I

335
00:19:54.680 --> 00:19:57.000
<v Speaker 1>wouldn't have a problem saying that my sister, Me and

336
00:19:57.119 --> 00:19:59.359
<v Speaker 1>my sister live together. I wouldn't have a problem saying

337
00:19:59.359 --> 00:20:02.079
<v Speaker 1>that because I know that this is in a transition, right.

338
00:20:02.359 --> 00:20:05.240
<v Speaker 1>I think that you have to be pay attention to

339
00:20:05.359 --> 00:20:08.880
<v Speaker 1>how that person handles that type of information, because I

340
00:20:09.000 --> 00:20:10.880
<v Speaker 1>think that you should be looking for a man that

341
00:20:11.079 --> 00:20:15.039
<v Speaker 1>is resourceful, that's looking to problem solve, that wants to

342
00:20:15.160 --> 00:20:18.440
<v Speaker 1>build with you, right, and so you should never also

343
00:20:18.680 --> 00:20:23.160
<v Speaker 1>have the posture of being embarrassed to share vulnerable things

344
00:20:23.240 --> 00:20:26.000
<v Speaker 1>about something about yourself if it's with the right person.

345
00:20:26.319 --> 00:20:28.640
<v Speaker 1>You don't want to have that type of guilt and shame.

346
00:20:28.759 --> 00:20:32.440
<v Speaker 1>You want to have such a transparent relationship with a

347
00:20:32.960 --> 00:20:35.079
<v Speaker 1>guy that you're dating or someone that you're interested in,

348
00:20:35.359 --> 00:20:38.480
<v Speaker 1>that you're able to say, I live with my parents

349
00:20:38.599 --> 00:20:41.799
<v Speaker 1>right now. It could have been that you already had

350
00:20:41.839 --> 00:20:45.319
<v Speaker 1>apartment before and you went through a transition, you lost

351
00:20:45.359 --> 00:20:47.440
<v Speaker 1>your job, and then you move back with your parents.

352
00:20:47.599 --> 00:20:49.720
<v Speaker 1>It could be that maybe you even never left your

353
00:20:49.839 --> 00:20:53.240
<v Speaker 1>parents' house, right. But I personally don't believe that women

354
00:20:53.359 --> 00:20:57.279
<v Speaker 1>and men have the same We don't have the same standard, right.

355
00:20:57.799 --> 00:21:01.119
<v Speaker 1>I think that a woman could very well be living

356
00:21:01.160 --> 00:21:03.640
<v Speaker 1>with her parents and it may be one of one

357
00:21:03.720 --> 00:21:06.359
<v Speaker 1>of those for a man living with his parents. I

358
00:21:06.559 --> 00:21:08.680
<v Speaker 1>just don't think that we have the same standards. And

359
00:21:08.799 --> 00:21:11.240
<v Speaker 1>I think that a man that really cares about you

360
00:21:11.559 --> 00:21:13.920
<v Speaker 1>is gonna swoop in and help you. So why be ashamed?

361
00:21:14.160 --> 00:21:16.519
<v Speaker 1>Why be ashamed to tell a man that you're living

362
00:21:16.559 --> 00:21:22.359
<v Speaker 1>with your parents? You see, women like to throw around

363
00:21:22.599 --> 00:21:24.880
<v Speaker 1>ego in the same way, and I always call it

364
00:21:25.319 --> 00:21:28.359
<v Speaker 1>thump Wallat's right, What is that going to communicate to

365
00:21:28.440 --> 00:21:32.519
<v Speaker 1>a man that you don't have your own apartment. I

366
00:21:32.880 --> 00:21:35.880
<v Speaker 1>think that it's actually an opportunity for him to assist

367
00:21:36.000 --> 00:21:38.279
<v Speaker 1>and to help. If that's not his thing, then cool,

368
00:21:38.359 --> 00:21:40.160
<v Speaker 1>that's not his thing. But I don't think that you

369
00:21:40.200 --> 00:21:43.720
<v Speaker 1>should be embarrassed or ashamed that you live with your parents.

370
00:21:43.839 --> 00:21:45.559
<v Speaker 1>I think that you could be going through a lot

371
00:21:45.640 --> 00:21:48.519
<v Speaker 1>of things and also you having your own and being

372
00:21:48.640 --> 00:21:51.880
<v Speaker 1>all independent. It's really just not your currency in life.

373
00:21:52.680 --> 00:21:55.599
<v Speaker 1>Be exactly who you are. It's not your job to

374
00:21:55.720 --> 00:21:58.000
<v Speaker 1>prove to a man that you you got it, how

375
00:21:58.039 --> 00:22:00.480
<v Speaker 1>he got it. I don't got it, high you got it?

376
00:22:01.000 --> 00:22:03.559
<v Speaker 1>Now you're gonna help me? Or what I don't have it,

377
00:22:03.640 --> 00:22:06.319
<v Speaker 1>how you got it. I'm working on myself. I'm in

378
00:22:06.400 --> 00:22:12.960
<v Speaker 1>a transition. This is this doesn't stop me from being patient, kind, nurturing, understanding, empathetic.

379
00:22:13.160 --> 00:22:15.319
<v Speaker 1>It doesn't. It doesn't stop me for doing any any

380
00:22:15.359 --> 00:22:17.680
<v Speaker 1>of those things. Right. But if you're looking for a

381
00:22:17.799 --> 00:22:20.160
<v Speaker 1>man to and and I'm saying this because there's a

382
00:22:20.240 --> 00:22:22.720
<v Speaker 1>difference in it when you're talking about women and men.

383
00:22:22.880 --> 00:22:26.359
<v Speaker 1>When you're looking for a man to provide, to protect

384
00:22:26.599 --> 00:22:31.680
<v Speaker 1>and things like that, having stability does matter. As a woman.

385
00:22:31.960 --> 00:22:35.400
<v Speaker 1>You could just be flapping around right and you don't.

386
00:22:35.640 --> 00:22:37.720
<v Speaker 1>You do want to have it together right, but we

387
00:22:37.839 --> 00:22:40.839
<v Speaker 1>don't have the same standard. Sometimes you just need to

388
00:22:40.920 --> 00:22:43.000
<v Speaker 1>help in hand, and I feel like a real one

389
00:22:43.119 --> 00:22:46.440
<v Speaker 1>is gonna step in and make sure that you're straight. Okay,

390
00:22:47.319 --> 00:22:50.160
<v Speaker 1>that's that's just how it works with being a woman.

391
00:22:50.240 --> 00:22:52.720
<v Speaker 1>And I didn't make the rules. Okay, I didn't make

392
00:22:52.799 --> 00:22:55.920
<v Speaker 1>the rules. I think that at times it could be

393
00:22:56.000 --> 00:22:59.559
<v Speaker 1>a little sketchy if a man isn't living on his own.

394
00:22:59.799 --> 00:23:05.240
<v Speaker 1>But as a woman, that don't mean nothing. What does

395
00:23:05.319 --> 00:23:08.599
<v Speaker 1>that say about you? What does that say about you?

396
00:23:08.839 --> 00:23:11.119
<v Speaker 1>You still living with your parents, girl, That's why you

397
00:23:11.200 --> 00:23:14.799
<v Speaker 1>were born. Okay, you still living with your parents, meaning

398
00:23:14.920 --> 00:23:18.319
<v Speaker 1>you have parents that support you, parents that support your dreams,

399
00:23:18.400 --> 00:23:21.200
<v Speaker 1>parents that support your transitions, parents that support you, and

400
00:23:21.279 --> 00:23:23.599
<v Speaker 1>you can always go back home when things ain't quite right.

401
00:23:23.720 --> 00:23:27.799
<v Speaker 1>Sounds like a good deal to me. If a real

402
00:23:27.960 --> 00:23:31.839
<v Speaker 1>man would be looking at that as a value add

403
00:23:31.960 --> 00:23:33.799
<v Speaker 1>he will be looking at that like, Wow, this woman

404
00:23:33.880 --> 00:23:37.160
<v Speaker 1>comes from great stocks. That's what I would think. I

405
00:23:37.279 --> 00:23:40.599
<v Speaker 1>don't see anything as a woman that living with your

406
00:23:40.759 --> 00:23:45.160
<v Speaker 1>parents would still kind of take it down a little bit.

407
00:23:45.240 --> 00:23:48.119
<v Speaker 1>I think it honestly may weed out the men. That's

408
00:23:48.200 --> 00:23:51.839
<v Speaker 1>because you know they always ask you do you live alone? Look,

409
00:23:52.079 --> 00:23:54.920
<v Speaker 1>go ahead and weed out the predators, okay, weed out

410
00:23:54.960 --> 00:23:57.440
<v Speaker 1>the men that don't have good intentions and only trying

411
00:23:57.480 --> 00:24:03.680
<v Speaker 1>to smash and dash, right, okay them the ones. It

412
00:24:03.799 --> 00:24:05.480
<v Speaker 1>probably is a good idea that you share with this

413
00:24:05.559 --> 00:24:07.279
<v Speaker 1>person that you still live with your parents. That means

414
00:24:07.319 --> 00:24:11.079
<v Speaker 1>he already know what's up, right. I don't think there's

415
00:24:11.119 --> 00:24:13.839
<v Speaker 1>anything wrong with the baby. Don't be scared at all. Actually,

416
00:24:13.839 --> 00:24:16.480
<v Speaker 1>it's a great test. Tell him and you can be

417
00:24:16.640 --> 00:24:19.200
<v Speaker 1>very transparent parent and tell him why it is that

418
00:24:19.279 --> 00:24:21.519
<v Speaker 1>you still live with your parents. And I think any

419
00:24:21.640 --> 00:24:25.960
<v Speaker 1>reasons that you that you give should be okay for

420
00:24:26.039 --> 00:24:28.680
<v Speaker 1>the right kind of man. And I said what I

421
00:24:28.720 --> 00:24:32.279
<v Speaker 1>said about that. Okay, on to our to see a

422
00:24:32.680 --> 00:24:36.200
<v Speaker 1>you Smell Good segment' y'all feel the rebranding, right? Do

423
00:24:36.200 --> 00:24:39.400
<v Speaker 1>you feel the rebranding? Yeah? Yeah, yeah yeah, stay down

424
00:24:39.480 --> 00:24:42.680
<v Speaker 1>all right? Okay, So y'all, I went on the cutest

425
00:24:43.519 --> 00:24:49.359
<v Speaker 1>date this past week, okay. And we went to the gym,

426
00:24:50.440 --> 00:24:53.039
<v Speaker 1>then we went shopping at blooming Dell's, and then we

427
00:24:53.119 --> 00:24:57.200
<v Speaker 1>went to lunch. But anyways, y'all, look, somebody was feeling

428
00:24:57.240 --> 00:25:01.680
<v Speaker 1>generous and I got this beautiful beauty fragrance that I

429
00:25:01.920 --> 00:25:05.880
<v Speaker 1>tested and blew me Dale's, y'all. And this is Louis

430
00:25:06.480 --> 00:25:13.240
<v Speaker 1>the fourteenth, seventeen twenty two d Vanage. And this is

431
00:25:13.440 --> 00:25:16.960
<v Speaker 1>from Zir, y'all. So this is like a rose kind

432
00:25:17.000 --> 00:25:19.720
<v Speaker 1>of fragrance. I smell this already, but I'm very excited

433
00:25:19.759 --> 00:25:23.640
<v Speaker 1>to open it, y'all. It's boxed so pretty. It's boxed

434
00:25:23.759 --> 00:25:28.440
<v Speaker 1>so pretty, y'all. Okay, let me show, y'all. Is too good.

435
00:25:28.960 --> 00:25:33.039
<v Speaker 1>It is too good, and I'm so excited, so excited.

436
00:25:34.559 --> 00:25:40.319
<v Speaker 1>All right, y'all. It's so pretty. It's so pretty in

437
00:25:40.400 --> 00:25:51.559
<v Speaker 1>this box. It's so pretty. Alright, Okay, baby, come on

438
00:25:51.759 --> 00:26:01.839
<v Speaker 1>out now. Sometimes you just gotta take it apart, all right. Ooh, y'all.

439
00:26:01.920 --> 00:26:07.000
<v Speaker 1>It's so soft and padded. It's so soft and padded. Okay, okay, y'all.

440
00:26:07.400 --> 00:26:11.680
<v Speaker 1>So this is the beauty here. It's so soft and padded.

441
00:26:11.960 --> 00:26:15.200
<v Speaker 1>This is the beauty here, y'all. Here it goes. This

442
00:26:15.359 --> 00:26:19.519
<v Speaker 1>is from Er, y'all. This is from This is from y'all.

443
00:26:21.599 --> 00:26:26.920
<v Speaker 1>How stunning is that this like it came with like

444
00:26:28.319 --> 00:26:33.279
<v Speaker 1>velvet suede paper on top, y'all. Look at this beauty.

445
00:26:37.039 --> 00:26:43.839
<v Speaker 1>Look at this beauty. Look at this beauty. It is gorgeous, gorgeous, gorgeous,

446
00:26:44.160 --> 00:26:47.640
<v Speaker 1>look at this beauty. Okay, okay, let's read the notes.

447
00:26:48.400 --> 00:26:56.480
<v Speaker 1>The notes are champagne, grapefruit, plum, saffron. The heart of

448
00:26:56.599 --> 00:27:02.000
<v Speaker 1>the fragrance consists of lavender, hazel nut, but coffee, rose,

449
00:27:02.759 --> 00:27:11.839
<v Speaker 1>and cocoa, settling on a base of sandalwood, white musk, cash, marion, cash, marion, leather,

450
00:27:12.119 --> 00:27:17.920
<v Speaker 1>and incense. Don't that sound like a rich girl fragrance?

451
00:27:18.400 --> 00:27:25.680
<v Speaker 1>That that sounds like bougie bourgeois. Okay, sounds so elevated, y'all.

452
00:27:26.039 --> 00:27:28.720
<v Speaker 1>Even he smelled it on me, because, y'all, he was like,

453
00:27:28.880 --> 00:27:33.839
<v Speaker 1>you want something? Never ask me that, baby, He said,

454
00:27:33.880 --> 00:27:36.240
<v Speaker 1>you want something out of here? Yes, I do, he was.

455
00:27:36.359 --> 00:27:38.079
<v Speaker 1>I was like, I'm gonna go to the fragrance countor

456
00:27:38.200 --> 00:27:40.799
<v Speaker 1>He's like, okay, i'll see you later. By the time

457
00:27:40.839 --> 00:27:42.640
<v Speaker 1>he came back, he said, did you figure out what

458
00:27:42.720 --> 00:27:47.880
<v Speaker 1>you wanted? I was like, he was like, yeah, that's good. Yeah, yeah, baby.

459
00:27:47.960 --> 00:27:50.359
<v Speaker 1>Never asked me. I said, you know the fragrance counter is.

460
00:27:51.119 --> 00:27:53.599
<v Speaker 1>He said, I'll get you one huh. And I'm gonna

461
00:27:53.599 --> 00:27:57.160
<v Speaker 1>tell you this, y'all. I did not I did not

462
00:27:57.279 --> 00:28:03.279
<v Speaker 1>spare his pockets. Hold on, I did not spare his

463
00:28:03.400 --> 00:28:07.039
<v Speaker 1>pockets because I'm just a girl. I picked something that

464
00:28:07.200 --> 00:28:15.640
<v Speaker 1>was moderately expensive, ky, moderately expensive. It it it was Yeah,

465
00:28:16.599 --> 00:28:21.039
<v Speaker 1>it wasn't like break the bank, but the bank was broken.

466
00:28:21.119 --> 00:28:21.599
<v Speaker 3>You know that.

467
00:28:21.960 --> 00:28:26.039
<v Speaker 1>You know what I'm saying. It wasn't like are you crazy?

468
00:28:26.880 --> 00:28:31.519
<v Speaker 1>But it was given like, yeah, set the tone. Okay,

469
00:28:31.799 --> 00:28:33.400
<v Speaker 1>set the tone, because I don't ever want you to

470
00:28:33.480 --> 00:28:40.319
<v Speaker 1>think you could go get me some somebody missed. Okay. Anyways, anyways,

471
00:28:41.480 --> 00:28:45.839
<v Speaker 1>tap to connect, tap to connect? Does that mean it's

472
00:28:48.200 --> 00:28:50.839
<v Speaker 1>is there some type of QR code in here? Anyways?

473
00:28:50.920 --> 00:29:01.359
<v Speaker 1>Let's give this a spray? Huh, y'all. It it's honestly,

474
00:29:01.440 --> 00:29:04.880
<v Speaker 1>seriously so good. I left Bloomingdale's with so many like

475
00:29:05.079 --> 00:29:08.200
<v Speaker 1>test strips of different fragrances, and you could smell this

476
00:29:08.480 --> 00:29:14.279
<v Speaker 1>on me six hours later? Can you smell it over there?

477
00:29:15.000 --> 00:29:17.480
<v Speaker 1>Can you smile at them? I was asking my sister

478
00:29:17.519 --> 00:29:24.119
<v Speaker 1>because she smell it. This is so feminine and ladylike.

479
00:29:24.559 --> 00:29:28.599
<v Speaker 1>It is so soft and elegant, y'all, y'all, I think

480
00:29:28.640 --> 00:29:33.119
<v Speaker 1>that the Seals associates said that this was a new release.

481
00:29:33.519 --> 00:29:36.279
<v Speaker 1>Don't don't quote me, don't quote me on that, but

482
00:29:36.440 --> 00:29:40.720
<v Speaker 1>I think it was actually a new release. Hmmm, let

483
00:29:40.759 --> 00:29:49.440
<v Speaker 1>me tell y'all this, Hey, it is so gorgeous. I

484
00:29:50.279 --> 00:29:52.839
<v Speaker 1>will I want to like paint a picture. This is

485
00:29:53.079 --> 00:30:03.359
<v Speaker 1>like just think pink, think delicate, think fresh, think elegant, classy.

486
00:30:04.079 --> 00:30:14.359
<v Speaker 1>I'm talking about just genuinely rich and luxury. This could

487
00:30:14.440 --> 00:30:19.759
<v Speaker 1>be honestly a stunning wedding fragrance. Okay, this could be

488
00:30:19.920 --> 00:30:29.400
<v Speaker 1>a stunning wedding fragrances. Wedding fragrance, think, think big ticket event.

489
00:30:29.880 --> 00:30:32.799
<v Speaker 1>But it has to be something relaxing. It's giving nap

490
00:30:32.839 --> 00:30:37.039
<v Speaker 1>a valley, right, it's giving a winery that type of vibe. Right,

491
00:30:39.160 --> 00:30:44.200
<v Speaker 1>too good to be true, baby, happy, Okay, thank you,

492
00:30:44.599 --> 00:30:47.799
<v Speaker 1>thank you the boy, Okay, thank you to that man.

493
00:30:47.960 --> 00:30:54.680
<v Speaker 1>All right. Happy to add our good syst to my collection.

494
00:30:55.759 --> 00:30:56.240
<v Speaker 3>Mm hmmm.

495
00:30:57.319 --> 00:31:02.079
<v Speaker 1>I can actually smell spell it right now. I've be

496
00:31:02.119 --> 00:31:03.359
<v Speaker 1>still smelling on my arm.

497
00:31:04.839 --> 00:31:05.480
<v Speaker 3>All right now.

498
00:31:05.599 --> 00:31:11.559
<v Speaker 1>Books the book's trying to fall child. Anyways, I can't

499
00:31:11.599 --> 00:31:15.920
<v Speaker 1>stop smelling. Whoo, whoo, whoop. It is too good, y'all,

500
00:31:16.400 --> 00:31:25.519
<v Speaker 1>It is too too too good. I I I seriously

501
00:31:25.599 --> 00:31:28.759
<v Speaker 1>can't stop smelling it. I I can't stop smelling it. Okay, y'all,

502
00:31:29.279 --> 00:31:35.759
<v Speaker 1>we were on We are on to our red flag report. Okay,

503
00:31:37.039 --> 00:31:39.759
<v Speaker 1>red flat report. This is so funny because my producer, Dre,

504
00:31:40.039 --> 00:31:42.079
<v Speaker 1>he's just texting me and he's like, did you add

505
00:31:42.079 --> 00:31:44.000
<v Speaker 1>where you're able to record any issues? Are you able

506
00:31:44.039 --> 00:31:48.680
<v Speaker 1>to record? I'm recording, okay, I'm recording on my own

507
00:31:49.119 --> 00:31:53.240
<v Speaker 1>on my god know on that sound anyways, that's courts Mine,

508
00:31:53.240 --> 00:31:55.559
<v Speaker 1>that's Crisp, Miss Shelle Child. What happened to christ What

509
00:31:55.720 --> 00:31:58.519
<v Speaker 1>happened to that girl? Anyways? God bless her? Or think

510
00:31:58.559 --> 00:32:01.680
<v Speaker 1>she got black ball for supporting he Trump rally? Yep, yep, yep,

511
00:32:01.759 --> 00:32:05.680
<v Speaker 1>that's what happened to her. Other I said, do you

512
00:32:05.759 --> 00:32:08.240
<v Speaker 1>think she's doing like weddings or something? She said, she

513
00:32:08.599 --> 00:32:11.279
<v Speaker 1>she's kind of famous. She's still famous to be doing

514
00:32:12.880 --> 00:32:16.160
<v Speaker 1>weddings and a background singer top stuff. I said, baby,

515
00:32:16.200 --> 00:32:22.319
<v Speaker 1>where is the girl her album? No Skips, No Skips?

516
00:32:22.400 --> 00:32:22.680
<v Speaker 3>You know what?

517
00:32:22.799 --> 00:32:27.440
<v Speaker 1>Paul? So, I was telling my sister that there was

518
00:32:27.640 --> 00:32:29.680
<v Speaker 1>a We were listening to Tony Braxton in the car

519
00:32:29.839 --> 00:32:32.000
<v Speaker 1>and I said, y'all, there was a period of time

520
00:32:32.519 --> 00:32:37.160
<v Speaker 1>when there was a train of R and B girls.

521
00:32:37.240 --> 00:32:40.160
<v Speaker 1>Y'all remember when it was Fantasia, it was Kay Michelle,

522
00:32:40.640 --> 00:32:44.720
<v Speaker 1>it was Tamar Braxton, it was Melanie, Fiona, it was

523
00:32:44.839 --> 00:32:47.759
<v Speaker 1>I said, it was Chrissette, Michelle, it was all of

524
00:32:48.000 --> 00:32:50.839
<v Speaker 1>the girls, all other girls, and we had like a

525
00:32:50.880 --> 00:32:53.640
<v Speaker 1>two to three year gap and then came Jazz and Sullivan.

526
00:32:54.119 --> 00:32:54.319
<v Speaker 3>Man.

527
00:32:55.519 --> 00:32:59.680
<v Speaker 1>Man, that was a good time. That me, Melanie, Fiona, Chrissette, Michelle,

528
00:32:59.759 --> 00:33:05.559
<v Speaker 1>fan Taja, Tamar Braxton. Huh that this period that was.

529
00:33:05.720 --> 00:33:07.759
<v Speaker 1>That was a good old time. That was a good

530
00:33:07.799 --> 00:33:09.440
<v Speaker 1>old time. Okay, that was a good old time. Okay,

531
00:33:09.519 --> 00:33:14.079
<v Speaker 1>y'all our red Flag report the crush Recession? Are we

532
00:33:14.319 --> 00:33:18.319
<v Speaker 1>losing the ability to fall for people? A new conversation

533
00:33:18.480 --> 00:33:22.880
<v Speaker 1>about modern dating is going viral following a recent article

534
00:33:23.079 --> 00:33:27.720
<v Speaker 1>titled Dating Apps in Valentine's Day, A Study of Modern

535
00:33:27.799 --> 00:33:32.440
<v Speaker 1>Dating Culture, published February twenty, twenty twenty six. According to

536
00:33:32.519 --> 00:33:36.480
<v Speaker 1>the report, many singles are experiencing what some are now

537
00:33:36.640 --> 00:33:41.880
<v Speaker 1>calling crush recession. The term describes a growing trend where

538
00:33:42.000 --> 00:33:47.440
<v Speaker 1>people say they rarely develop genuine romantic interests in others anymore.

539
00:33:48.000 --> 00:33:52.079
<v Speaker 1>The conversation started after a viral video from a young

540
00:33:52.200 --> 00:33:56.000
<v Speaker 1>woman in the UK who admitted she hadn't had a

541
00:33:56.160 --> 00:33:59.400
<v Speaker 1>real crush in years, she said, I don't even find

542
00:33:59.480 --> 00:34:02.400
<v Speaker 1>anyone a tract of anymore. I don't even know what

543
00:34:02.720 --> 00:34:07.039
<v Speaker 1>my type is. The video quickly gained one hundred thousand views,

544
00:34:07.119 --> 00:34:10.559
<v Speaker 1>with thousands of people agreeing in the comments that dating

545
00:34:10.840 --> 00:34:16.519
<v Speaker 1>today feels exhausting, disconnected, and discouraging. The article suggests several

546
00:34:16.559 --> 00:34:19.400
<v Speaker 1>reasons behind it. I'm interested to see what the several

547
00:34:19.440 --> 00:34:24.400
<v Speaker 1>reasons are because I have my own theories. Okay. One

548
00:34:24.440 --> 00:34:29.679
<v Speaker 1>of the biggest factors is dating fatigue. Dating a fatigue.

549
00:34:30.000 --> 00:34:34.880
<v Speaker 1>Many single say modern dating has become a repetitive cycle

550
00:34:35.000 --> 00:34:39.119
<v Speaker 1>of endless swiping, superficial conversations, and short lived connections that

551
00:34:39.360 --> 00:34:44.840
<v Speaker 1>rarely develop into real relationships. Instead of building genuine attraction,

552
00:34:45.400 --> 00:34:49.599
<v Speaker 1>many people find themselves stuck in situationships, or talking stages

553
00:34:49.679 --> 00:34:53.800
<v Speaker 1>that never progress. The report also points out points to

554
00:34:53.880 --> 00:34:57.639
<v Speaker 1>the lack of real life connection. While people are constantly

555
00:34:57.760 --> 00:35:01.719
<v Speaker 1>connected online, they are in interacting with people in person

556
00:35:01.920 --> 00:35:05.280
<v Speaker 1>less than previous generations, which makes it harder for natural

557
00:35:05.360 --> 00:35:10.599
<v Speaker 1>attraction to develop Over time. Repeated disappointments and dating can

558
00:35:10.719 --> 00:35:17.000
<v Speaker 1>lead to what researchers call dating pessimism or hetero pessimism,

559
00:35:17.480 --> 00:35:22.440
<v Speaker 1>which people begin to believe success successful relationships are rare

560
00:35:22.559 --> 00:35:26.840
<v Speaker 1>or unrealistic, and the emotional impact can be significant. A

561
00:35:27.000 --> 00:35:31.960
<v Speaker 1>survey sighted in the article found that over fifteen million

562
00:35:32.119 --> 00:35:36.639
<v Speaker 1>young adults say Valentine's Day negatively affects their mental health,

563
00:35:37.000 --> 00:35:42.000
<v Speaker 1>often being often because it highlights feelings of loneliness or

564
00:35:42.119 --> 00:35:46.280
<v Speaker 1>failed relationships. At the same time, broader statistics show a

565
00:35:46.480 --> 00:35:50.440
<v Speaker 1>major cultural shift. Marriage rates in the US have declined

566
00:35:50.519 --> 00:35:55.159
<v Speaker 1>by fifty four percent between nineteen ninety nine and twenty

567
00:35:55.239 --> 00:35:59.079
<v Speaker 1>twenty two, suggesting that fewer people are forming long term

568
00:35:59.239 --> 00:36:07.800
<v Speaker 1>partnerships than previous generations. Some experts believe financial distress, financial stress,

569
00:36:08.039 --> 00:36:12.280
<v Speaker 1>dating apps, and declining social interactions are all contributing to

570
00:36:12.440 --> 00:36:17.719
<v Speaker 1>what may now call many may call a modern loneliness epidemic,

571
00:36:18.000 --> 00:36:22.400
<v Speaker 1>with Gen Z reporting the highest levels of loneliness despite

572
00:36:22.840 --> 00:36:33.960
<v Speaker 1>being the most digitally connected generation. Here's my thing, y'all. Okay,

573
00:36:36.599 --> 00:36:39.599
<v Speaker 1>they're so First of all, that was long. That was long.

574
00:36:39.760 --> 00:36:42.039
<v Speaker 1>That was a mouthful. Okay, here's my thing.

575
00:36:43.280 --> 00:36:43.960
<v Speaker 3>There are.

576
00:36:48.039 --> 00:36:50.960
<v Speaker 1>There's absolutely dating fatigue, Okay, y'all. I just read this.

577
00:36:52.199 --> 00:36:57.079
<v Speaker 1>In nineteen sixty there was a study done on mice.

578
00:36:58.119 --> 00:37:03.119
<v Speaker 1>They put four male mice and four female mice in

579
00:37:04.360 --> 00:37:09.400
<v Speaker 1>in this cage. Now, they gave them the ultimate crime environment.

580
00:37:09.719 --> 00:37:13.719
<v Speaker 1>They had unlimited food, they had water, they had all

581
00:37:13.800 --> 00:37:15.440
<v Speaker 1>the things so they didn't have to go search or

582
00:37:15.519 --> 00:37:18.719
<v Speaker 1>hunt for anything or find stuff. It was literally the

583
00:37:19.480 --> 00:37:23.840
<v Speaker 1>most perfect environment that mice could be in. Everything was

584
00:37:24.000 --> 00:37:29.880
<v Speaker 1>provided three ninety nine. Okay, the mice began to mate,

585
00:37:30.119 --> 00:37:35.280
<v Speaker 1>and they like, what's the word, they reproduced over and

586
00:37:35.360 --> 00:37:37.199
<v Speaker 1>over and over and over and over again. I'm talking

587
00:37:37.199 --> 00:37:42.440
<v Speaker 1>about what started as eight mice became hundreds and thousands

588
00:37:42.599 --> 00:37:47.960
<v Speaker 1>of mice. Do you know that after I forgot how

589
00:37:48.039 --> 00:37:53.719
<v Speaker 1>long of time, the mice stopped mating and eventually died.

590
00:37:54.719 --> 00:37:59.159
<v Speaker 1>So basically, the scientists said that the reason for this

591
00:37:59.480 --> 00:38:07.039
<v Speaker 1>is that the male mice became overstimulated. They became like

592
00:38:07.400 --> 00:38:13.400
<v Speaker 1>less engaged because they had such a quantity of female

593
00:38:13.599 --> 00:38:20.199
<v Speaker 1>mice running around, they lacked connection the innate Like I'm

594
00:38:20.239 --> 00:38:25.239
<v Speaker 1>talking about innate kind of characteristics of mating and matching

595
00:38:25.280 --> 00:38:26.960
<v Speaker 1>with each other. And you know what I said when

596
00:38:26.960 --> 00:38:31.280
<v Speaker 1>I read this, I said, sounds just like social media, right,

597
00:38:31.679 --> 00:38:35.239
<v Speaker 1>sounds just like the illusion that men have more options

598
00:38:35.519 --> 00:38:39.440
<v Speaker 1>than they have because they can see more options online.

599
00:38:39.800 --> 00:38:44.519
<v Speaker 1>We now have access to more we have more visibility

600
00:38:44.960 --> 00:38:48.559
<v Speaker 1>and more ways to connect than ever before. So I

601
00:38:48.800 --> 00:38:55.039
<v Speaker 1>absolutely agree that men are now desensitized to natural, authentic connections.

602
00:38:55.400 --> 00:38:58.800
<v Speaker 1>I think that they have less of the pursuit to

603
00:38:59.519 --> 00:39:02.639
<v Speaker 1>connect with women in real life. I think that men

604
00:39:03.000 --> 00:39:09.960
<v Speaker 1>are also have had more vulnerable spaces to really communicate

605
00:39:10.079 --> 00:39:15.159
<v Speaker 1>their emotions about rejection, about fear, about not feeling adequate,

606
00:39:15.519 --> 00:39:20.880
<v Speaker 1>which then results in how do I say this, more

607
00:39:21.119 --> 00:39:27.079
<v Speaker 1>of a pull for understanding from women, which then leads

608
00:39:27.199 --> 00:39:30.480
<v Speaker 1>for women to make up the slack. Okay, now that

609
00:39:30.639 --> 00:39:33.639
<v Speaker 1>women have now that men have a microphone and a

610
00:39:33.760 --> 00:39:39.320
<v Speaker 1>space to talk about these things, they now are able

611
00:39:39.400 --> 00:39:44.400
<v Speaker 1>to leverage vulnerability. They're now able to talk about emotions

612
00:39:44.519 --> 00:39:49.719
<v Speaker 1>and feelings, which now honestly makes women have to fill

613
00:39:49.760 --> 00:39:52.760
<v Speaker 1>in the slack a little bit. They now have to

614
00:39:53.400 --> 00:39:58.320
<v Speaker 1>present themselves and be in proximity and start conversations and

615
00:39:58.719 --> 00:40:01.960
<v Speaker 1>make the first wipe I E. Bumble. Right, They're now

616
00:40:02.320 --> 00:40:07.960
<v Speaker 1>having to connect more because men are being more open

617
00:40:08.079 --> 00:40:12.239
<v Speaker 1>and honest about where they are in life. Right. I

618
00:40:12.440 --> 00:40:18.000
<v Speaker 1>think that dating apps can be helpful, but it also

619
00:40:18.280 --> 00:40:24.880
<v Speaker 1>has lowered r IQ. Okay, I was just sharing the

620
00:40:25.000 --> 00:40:27.840
<v Speaker 1>other day that I used to work a job where

621
00:40:27.880 --> 00:40:31.920
<v Speaker 1>I was in childcare and I would have to type

622
00:40:32.000 --> 00:40:35.119
<v Speaker 1>the reports. I would audit daycarees for the government, and

623
00:40:35.239 --> 00:40:40.119
<v Speaker 1>I had to type these reports where I had to

624
00:40:40.199 --> 00:40:42.679
<v Speaker 1>report on what I saw at that daycare right and

625
00:40:43.039 --> 00:40:46.480
<v Speaker 1>with that, I was typing, type and typing every single day.

626
00:40:47.320 --> 00:40:51.119
<v Speaker 1>Because I stepped away from that job, I'm noticing that

627
00:40:51.679 --> 00:40:55.119
<v Speaker 1>I'm not as quick of a type of a typer.

628
00:40:55.559 --> 00:40:59.400
<v Speaker 1>I'm not now. Granted, my nails are a lot longer,

629
00:40:59.719 --> 00:41:01.719
<v Speaker 1>and I I know that that has contributed to what

630
00:41:01.840 --> 00:41:04.000
<v Speaker 1>y'all I need to cut these things down. My nails

631
00:41:04.039 --> 00:41:07.880
<v Speaker 1>are a lot longer, but I'm noticing now that I'm

632
00:41:07.920 --> 00:41:11.559
<v Speaker 1>not as fast, and it's because I'm not flexing that muscle.

633
00:41:11.679 --> 00:41:14.599
<v Speaker 1>I'm not utilizing that skill as often as I have

634
00:41:14.760 --> 00:41:16.599
<v Speaker 1>been in the past. I think it's the same thing

635
00:41:16.679 --> 00:41:22.880
<v Speaker 1>with these men. Okay, they are becoming weaker in that

636
00:41:23.119 --> 00:41:25.880
<v Speaker 1>department and talking about something. We don't want to be rejected.

637
00:41:25.880 --> 00:41:28.599
<v Speaker 1>We don't want to be rejected. They're becoming weaker in

638
00:41:28.719 --> 00:41:31.960
<v Speaker 1>that department because they're not flexing that muscle. They now

639
00:41:32.079 --> 00:41:35.039
<v Speaker 1>can slide in your DMS, they can meet you on

640
00:41:35.159 --> 00:41:38.599
<v Speaker 1>the app. Hell, they'll even meet you in person, connect

641
00:41:38.639 --> 00:41:40.960
<v Speaker 1>with you on ig and instead of texting or call

642
00:41:41.039 --> 00:41:43.599
<v Speaker 1>on you, they send you a message or start liking

643
00:41:43.639 --> 00:41:48.360
<v Speaker 1>your stories and your pictures. So I absolutely positively agree.

644
00:41:48.519 --> 00:41:53.599
<v Speaker 1>I'm actually very shocked to find out that the we've

645
00:41:53.760 --> 00:41:57.000
<v Speaker 1>dropped fifty four percent in marriages. And see this is

646
00:41:57.159 --> 00:42:01.360
<v Speaker 1>actually feeds beautifully into this conversation because it's the idea

647
00:42:02.000 --> 00:42:08.920
<v Speaker 1>and the perspective that everything is happening more. If you

648
00:42:09.039 --> 00:42:12.079
<v Speaker 1>were to ask me, I would be like marriage has increased.

649
00:42:12.119 --> 00:42:13.760
<v Speaker 1>Why Because I'm saying a whole bunch of marriages on

650
00:42:13.760 --> 00:42:19.280
<v Speaker 1>the internet. What in culture has increased significantly? But it's

651
00:42:19.400 --> 00:42:24.920
<v Speaker 1>not because it is because apparently statistically it isn't it's

652
00:42:25.000 --> 00:42:27.000
<v Speaker 1>not because it is. It's because that's what I see,

653
00:42:27.320 --> 00:42:28.679
<v Speaker 1>and that's what I'm focused on. I just had a

654
00:42:28.679 --> 00:42:31.800
<v Speaker 1>conversation with this about this with my girls Chad that

655
00:42:32.360 --> 00:42:35.320
<v Speaker 1>whatever you focus on is what you will see. There

656
00:42:35.480 --> 00:42:41.119
<v Speaker 1>was a study where they did look for something blue

657
00:42:41.320 --> 00:42:45.159
<v Speaker 1>in the room. Everybody looked for something blue, and they said,

658
00:42:45.239 --> 00:42:48.400
<v Speaker 1>I saw that bottle was blue, that cup is blue.

659
00:42:49.119 --> 00:42:51.719
<v Speaker 1>They picked out all the blue things and then they said,

660
00:42:51.840 --> 00:42:53.719
<v Speaker 1>now can you tell me what was pink in that room?

661
00:42:54.079 --> 00:42:58.280
<v Speaker 1>And nobody, nobody knew because why they were focused on

662
00:42:58.519 --> 00:43:01.360
<v Speaker 1>what was blue. What you focus on is what you

663
00:43:01.480 --> 00:43:09.519
<v Speaker 1>will see. And I genuinely, I genuinely think that I

664
00:43:09.639 --> 00:43:13.360
<v Speaker 1>have probably just been focused on marriage more. Marriage is

665
00:43:13.519 --> 00:43:15.880
<v Speaker 1>all in my ether. I'm putting that on me. I'm

666
00:43:15.880 --> 00:43:18.440
<v Speaker 1>sending that into the universe. For me, marriage was just

667
00:43:18.639 --> 00:43:21.679
<v Speaker 1>is just in my ether. So I am saving more,

668
00:43:21.840 --> 00:43:25.840
<v Speaker 1>saving more. Wedding ideas is more on my algorithm. But

669
00:43:26.079 --> 00:43:31.639
<v Speaker 1>I genuinely thought that we were getting married more when

670
00:43:31.679 --> 00:43:37.880
<v Speaker 1>actually we're being We're getting married half as much. I

671
00:43:37.920 --> 00:43:41.119
<v Speaker 1>don't know. I don't know that was from that was

672
00:43:41.119 --> 00:43:43.880
<v Speaker 1>supposed to be from nineteen ninety something to twenty twenty two.

673
00:43:44.599 --> 00:43:46.039
<v Speaker 1>I want to check the status now.

674
00:43:46.199 --> 00:43:48.000
<v Speaker 2>I just I just can't believe that.

675
00:43:48.639 --> 00:43:50.559
<v Speaker 1>I just can't believe that. But what I will say

676
00:43:50.760 --> 00:43:55.920
<v Speaker 1>is that there are a lot of deficits that we're seeing.

677
00:43:57.400 --> 00:44:00.719
<v Speaker 1>There aren't. The thing is that And I'm only gonna

678
00:44:00.719 --> 00:44:04.719
<v Speaker 1>speak to heterosexual relationships, right, everybody's included here, Okay, I

679
00:44:04.840 --> 00:44:06.719
<v Speaker 1>love all people. I'm just gonna talk about what I

680
00:44:06.920 --> 00:44:10.480
<v Speaker 1>know the most right. Men and women are not on

681
00:44:10.639 --> 00:44:15.079
<v Speaker 1>the same page. Okay. I think what has happened and

682
00:44:15.159 --> 00:44:21.480
<v Speaker 1>has created this huge deficit is that men men got

683
00:44:21.519 --> 00:44:24.519
<v Speaker 1>their money first, and then women weren't allowed to work,

684
00:44:24.559 --> 00:44:27.559
<v Speaker 1>and there was this whole push to be for equity

685
00:44:27.760 --> 00:44:34.760
<v Speaker 1>and inclusion and equality right, and then women were able

686
00:44:34.840 --> 00:44:41.480
<v Speaker 1>to work at the same time men. There was a

687
00:44:41.639 --> 00:44:46.519
<v Speaker 1>huge break and gap for black men in particular, you

688
00:44:46.639 --> 00:44:50.519
<v Speaker 1>got the crack phase, you got a mass incarceration, right,

689
00:44:50.639 --> 00:44:55.079
<v Speaker 1>So then there was a dip, and then now women

690
00:44:55.159 --> 00:44:57.840
<v Speaker 1>are still up, and then men are kind of coming up,

691
00:44:58.119 --> 00:45:00.239
<v Speaker 1>coming up now. And what I feel like is that

692
00:45:00.480 --> 00:45:02.159
<v Speaker 1>we're never in the same place at the same time.

693
00:45:03.519 --> 00:45:05.320
<v Speaker 1>Either men are down and the women are up, and

694
00:45:05.400 --> 00:45:06.920
<v Speaker 1>the men not down and the women are up, or

695
00:45:06.960 --> 00:45:09.639
<v Speaker 1>the women are up, and it's we're never there at

696
00:45:09.639 --> 00:45:14.119
<v Speaker 1>the same time. And so I think that those gaps

697
00:45:14.679 --> 00:45:20.400
<v Speaker 1>have still kind of pushed us into different spaces and times.

698
00:45:20.719 --> 00:45:23.840
<v Speaker 1>And now you're seeing a lot of modern a lot

699
00:45:23.920 --> 00:45:28.000
<v Speaker 1>of a lot of modern couples trying to to to

700
00:45:28.519 --> 00:45:31.519
<v Speaker 1>to make it all equal, right, to make it way.

701
00:45:31.559 --> 00:45:33.880
<v Speaker 1>You're seeing a lot of men that are now baby

702
00:45:35.320 --> 00:45:39.599
<v Speaker 1>doing that housework because everything is unequal, right, so in

703
00:45:39.840 --> 00:45:42.079
<v Speaker 1>order for you to leverage what used to be men

704
00:45:42.159 --> 00:45:44.199
<v Speaker 1>going out and working and women saying in the house.

705
00:45:44.480 --> 00:45:47.119
<v Speaker 1>Now it's not quite the same, because women are earning

706
00:45:47.360 --> 00:45:50.559
<v Speaker 1>and earning more and significantly more at times. Now. Now

707
00:45:50.719 --> 00:45:53.280
<v Speaker 1>men are picking up that town, they're picking up that mop.

708
00:45:53.320 --> 00:45:55.679
<v Speaker 1>They're cooking, okay, picking up them pops and pans, and

709
00:45:55.760 --> 00:45:58.559
<v Speaker 1>they're cooking to leverage that difference. And I think that

710
00:45:58.679 --> 00:46:01.039
<v Speaker 1>we're seeing that a lot with these couples, y'all, a

711
00:46:01.119 --> 00:46:03.719
<v Speaker 1>lot with these couples. We're trying to make up the gaps.

712
00:46:04.079 --> 00:46:08.320
<v Speaker 1>And I actually think that it may be and we

713
00:46:08.440 --> 00:46:14.719
<v Speaker 1>may be closing in on a space where not just y'all,

714
00:46:14.840 --> 00:46:18.679
<v Speaker 1>this fragrance smells God, it's so good that we're closing

715
00:46:18.760 --> 00:46:23.119
<v Speaker 1>in the gaps of not just men and women being

716
00:46:23.239 --> 00:46:27.719
<v Speaker 1>more on a financial on the same page financially, but

717
00:46:27.960 --> 00:46:31.000
<v Speaker 1>also black men and men in particular are going to

718
00:46:31.119 --> 00:46:35.039
<v Speaker 1>therapy more. We're seeing a lot more emotional intelligence and

719
00:46:35.119 --> 00:46:38.440
<v Speaker 1>a lot of a lot more emotional maturity. We're also

720
00:46:38.559 --> 00:46:43.920
<v Speaker 1>seeing women melts down and more of their feminine energy,

721
00:46:44.039 --> 00:46:53.880
<v Speaker 1>and also holding themselves more accountable for what, more accountable

722
00:46:54.000 --> 00:46:59.639
<v Speaker 1>for the role that they've played in the breakdown of

723
00:47:00.159 --> 00:47:03.679
<v Speaker 1>the black family. Okay, I think we're actually closing in

724
00:47:03.880 --> 00:47:08.280
<v Speaker 1>the gaps on that so long story short, I absolutely

725
00:47:08.400 --> 00:47:11.000
<v Speaker 1>agree that there's a disconnect. I absolutely agree that we

726
00:47:11.119 --> 00:47:14.880
<v Speaker 1>are desensitized to real life connections.

727
00:47:14.800 --> 00:47:14.880
<v Speaker 2>And.

728
00:47:16.800 --> 00:47:20.280
<v Speaker 1>I have hope that we are going to finally land

729
00:47:20.360 --> 00:47:22.800
<v Speaker 1>in the same place at the same time and to

730
00:47:23.320 --> 00:47:28.480
<v Speaker 1>close that gap. We did good, y'all. Let's look new

731
00:47:28.599 --> 00:47:31.280
<v Speaker 1>set who this may not stick around for long, y'all,

732
00:47:31.320 --> 00:47:33.480
<v Speaker 1>but like I did it. Aren't y'all proud of me?

733
00:47:34.119 --> 00:47:38.920
<v Speaker 1>I did it. I filmed myself in my own space. Okay,

734
00:47:40.800 --> 00:47:44.920
<v Speaker 1>I did not, you know, skip a week because we

735
00:47:45.039 --> 00:47:47.840
<v Speaker 1>were having you know, some you know, some little little

736
00:47:47.880 --> 00:47:52.119
<v Speaker 1>technical difficulties or you know, just a setup issue, right,

737
00:47:52.199 --> 00:47:54.320
<v Speaker 1>meaning that you know, just the schedules in the line.

738
00:47:54.719 --> 00:47:57.079
<v Speaker 1>I did it. I did it. Are y'all proud of me?

739
00:47:57.519 --> 00:48:00.639
<v Speaker 1>I am committed to building dear to see you to

740
00:48:00.840 --> 00:48:05.440
<v Speaker 1>be a huge, huge, huge brand in platform, and I

741
00:48:05.559 --> 00:48:08.480
<v Speaker 1>am excited. I am excited, y'all. Thank y'all for rocking

742
00:48:08.559 --> 00:48:11.480
<v Speaker 1>with me, for going through the ups, the downs, the

743
00:48:11.679 --> 00:48:14.880
<v Speaker 1>rounds and the rounds. Okay, thank y'all for rocking with me.

744
00:48:15.079 --> 00:48:18.800
<v Speaker 1>And I'm really I'm really proud of myself. Anyways, I'll

745
00:48:18.840 --> 00:48:22.519
<v Speaker 1>see y'all next time. See you later. Bye.

746
00:48:22.599 --> 00:48:22.800
<v Speaker 3>Down