WEBVTT

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<v Speaker 1>Hey, this is Lapse Jesse the Body Ventura. I understand

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<v Speaker 1>that the Lapsed Fan wrestling podcast, despite being a United

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<v Speaker 1>States based podcast not recording out of Mexico, is up

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<v Speaker 1>for an award. I understand that they are up for

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<v Speaker 1>the Sports Podcast Award for Best Wrestling Podcast. That's exciting news.

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<v Speaker 1>But you know why I'm a fan of the Lapsed Fan.

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<v Speaker 1>It's because they're a third party podcast. You know, That's

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<v Speaker 1>the whole thing about it. I'm a third party candidate.

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<v Speaker 1>They don't let me in the debates because they know

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<v Speaker 1>I'd win. And I'll tell you what what makes this

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<v Speaker 1>an extraordinary event is that the Sports Podcast Awards have

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<v Speaker 1>allowed a third party podcast in their debates, in their judging,

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<v Speaker 1>in their voting, which means, you know what, we have

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<v Speaker 1>a chance. So go to your nearest polling station and

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<v Speaker 1>vote for the Lapsed Fan. I'll tell you where I go.

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<v Speaker 1>I go to www. Dot sports Podcastgroup, dot com, slash

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<v Speaker 1>sports Underscore category slash best dash Wrestling dash Podcast slash hashtag.

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<v Speaker 1>Because I'm going to show the world once again that

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<v Speaker 1>third parties are the best, and that the Lapsed Fan

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<v Speaker 1>is the best third party podcast that there ever was.

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<v Speaker 1>We can shock the world again.

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<v Speaker 2>It's the Lapsed Fan Wrestling Podcast with Jack mcarn seo

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<v Speaker 2>and JP Sorrow.

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<v Speaker 3>We've got an exciting Christmas program lined up for these folks.

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<v Speaker 3>We've been to a Little Boys this year. I don't know.

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<v Speaker 3>It's an artificial tree, so I did artificial job at trimming.

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<v Speaker 3>The kindness is only exceeded by our inability to adjust.

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<v Speaker 2>All of the Here the Lapsed fant a price for

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<v Speaker 2>the million dollar Man.

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<v Speaker 3>Even Santa Claus in South say it's not so.

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<v Speaker 2>And the twenty twenty four Left Christmas Show continues here

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<v Speaker 2>as we continue working our way through just an absolute

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<v Speaker 2>mortgage board and assault.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh it's it's said, yes.

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<v Speaker 2>Holiday generosity really testing our testing our endurance here.

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<v Speaker 3>I mean this.

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<v Speaker 2>We thought this was exhausting when we did this three

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<v Speaker 2>years ago.

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<v Speaker 3>I know it's like you got still got like twelve

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<v Speaker 3>packages to helping them.

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<v Speaker 2>This is brought to us by way of Parcel Force worldwide.

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<v Speaker 2>This must be an international package. We don't have any

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<v Speaker 2>force external indication. Oh yes we do. This is from

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<v Speaker 2>phil and this is in Chesterfield, UK.

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<v Speaker 3>Wow.

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<v Speaker 2>So another gift from over the pond.

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<v Speaker 3>Scissors, Yes I do.

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<v Speaker 2>Do you have the scissors? The unwrapping continues. Mamasara holds

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<v Speaker 2>her breath every time we throw the scissors at each other,

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<v Speaker 2>which is I suppose.

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<v Speaker 3>I suppose that's fine, and it's very much. You know,

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<v Speaker 3>she doesn't want an arn innercent situation to come out.

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<v Speaker 2>With these international packages or something else. Yeah, what am

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<v Speaker 2>I supposed to do with this? Honestly?

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<v Speaker 3>I mean there's no Yeah, there's no like entry point.

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<v Speaker 2>You know, there's no there's no evidence. Yes, there's no

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<v Speaker 2>evidence place that you should start right. And as you

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<v Speaker 2>experiment you realize you don't necessarily have the right side.

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<v Speaker 2>But we can't complain. We can only open and unwrap

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<v Speaker 2>and share.

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<v Speaker 3>We can.

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<v Speaker 2>It's holiday joy Ooh, we just hit the jackpot.

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<v Speaker 3>What the hell?

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<v Speaker 2>We start with a note?

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<v Speaker 3>Oh boy, lots of cardboard, lots of cardboard.

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<v Speaker 2>This is a red envelope tucked thoughtfully into what I

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<v Speaker 2>can tell you is going to be not just a

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<v Speaker 2>virtual but a literal feast from jolly old England for

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<v Speaker 2>your co chairs. Say on one Christmas, shew that you

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<v Speaker 2>love the British candy and oh I know they Oh people,

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<v Speaker 2>Merry Christmas to a special couple. The card says that's

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<v Speaker 2>too much that's really fun. Okay to Jack and JP,

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<v Speaker 2>congratulations on ten years. Hope you have a cozy Christmas.

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<v Speaker 2>Here's to the next decade. All the best, Philip Bayne.

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<v Speaker 2>That's a very familiar name and it's great to hear

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<v Speaker 2>from Phil. Phil writes a letter this holiday season, Dear

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<v Speaker 2>Jack and JP, season's greetings once again, Happy tenth TF

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<v Speaker 2>Christmas and the third year of the tlf unwrappening. Twenty

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<v Speaker 2>twenty four has been another eventful year in the TF

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<v Speaker 2>solar system. The conclusion of the Lapsed Funk, the demise

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<v Speaker 2>of Mike Jones aka Virgil, and the revelation that his

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<v Speaker 2>misreported age was to cover up doing time for Heroin Trashada.

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<v Speaker 2>That was this year, My God, the Wrestlmania Live Show,

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<v Speaker 2>tf's collaboration with Dark Side of the Ring for the

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<v Speaker 2>Unheard series and Who Killed WCW Companion series, amongst the

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<v Speaker 2>general festivities of TLFX, and another excellent under the cinemat

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<v Speaker 2>journey with carni'es r Forever, where we learned that lapsed

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<v Speaker 2>Sean Connery actually shags the Bond Girls live during filming

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<v Speaker 2>and that Roger Moore is probably the greatest person that

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<v Speaker 2>ever lived. Yes, latterly we had the passing of sid

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<v Speaker 2>and at the time of writing the ongoing tribute series

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<v Speaker 2>to the Master and Ruler of the world. Keep up

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<v Speaker 2>the great work, guy, and many others will be listening

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<v Speaker 2>to every word of it. You may wish to unwrap

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<v Speaker 2>the gifts before reading any further. Oh boy, here we

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<v Speaker 2>have foam shrimps from the UK Ma Massaro's face. These

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<v Speaker 2>are strawberry flavored foam candies in the shape of shrimps.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh my god, this is like way too much. Look

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<v Speaker 2>at all these candy wine gums, fruit flavored jelly sweets,

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<v Speaker 2>foam bananas. You see the foam is in different in

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<v Speaker 2>different peanuts. They look like peanuts.

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<v Speaker 3>Yes, these are way harder.

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<v Speaker 2>These are jelly babies and a sortpent of shaped fruit

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<v Speaker 2>flavor jellies. This all the way from the UK squashies

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<v Speaker 2>bubble gum flavor. Oh my god, I think what he

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<v Speaker 2>wanted us to do is unwrapped the wrapped gifts so much.

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<v Speaker 3>What do you think? What are you eating? Foam shrimp?

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<v Speaker 3>What do you think it's okay?

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<v Speaker 2>Sorry? Sorry, not away from me, Sorry Philip. We're gonna

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<v Speaker 2>try foam banana. Would you like to try a foam banana,

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<v Speaker 2>Mama sorrow. Let us know what you think. Go ahead,

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<v Speaker 2>you sampling.

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<v Speaker 3>Flavor. No, I feel the same way about the shrimp, like.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, because they say foam, it's hard. It smells like

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<v Speaker 2>a banana. I don't know if it tastes like one.

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<v Speaker 2>Let's get a verdict here, Foam bananas.

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<v Speaker 3>Everything you imagine, everything you desire. I kind of like it,

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<v Speaker 3>all right, Well, you know you're allowed to be wrong.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I am. It almost tastes like like a like

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<v Speaker 2>the sweeties you get in Valentine's Day was a little small.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I think those have more flavored.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes they are, but I'm getting strong canani vibe. Let's

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<v Speaker 2>take a look. Oh my god, what is that WW

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<v Speaker 2>Top Trump's Quiz with a Twist? What this must be

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<v Speaker 2>a quiz game. Test your knowledge and twist your memory

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<v Speaker 2>in this instant knockout battle game. Oh god, I'm not

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<v Speaker 2>going to be if we'll be playing this one. Five

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<v Speaker 2>hundred questions age eight plus also wrapped. It's the following.

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<v Speaker 3>It's like an iPhone.

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<v Speaker 2>This is a Top Trump's WW Legends card game. Oh no,

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<v Speaker 2>this might just be a deck of cards. Top Trumps

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<v Speaker 2>must be a UK.

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<v Speaker 1>Say, I mean, we have a top Trump as well,

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<v Speaker 1>But why.

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<v Speaker 2>Do you try some wine gums all right? From the

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<v Speaker 2>UK wine gums. No, that's not that Trump. I'm almost

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<v Speaker 2>certain of its.

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<v Speaker 3>Wine gums has to do.

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<v Speaker 2>Well. You try the wine gum. Mama Sara and I

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<v Speaker 2>are gonna try a bubble gum flavor squashies drumstick.

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<v Speaker 3>Okay, bubbles delight.

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<v Speaker 2>You think, boss delight. It doesn't very chilly, very chilly

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<v Speaker 2>wine gums thoughts pretty good. You like that one better

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<v Speaker 2>than the shrimp one.

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<v Speaker 3>Like a multi flavored like Swedish fish.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, there's a bubble gum drumstick for you, Mama Sorrow.

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<v Speaker 2>Bubble gum flavored squashes drumstick. I hope tast No, I

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<v Speaker 2>don't think so. I think it's an edible.

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<v Speaker 3>It was as nasty, I hope. I hope that my

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<v Speaker 3>sound is as nasty as I hear it.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, we can, we can. We're getting a lot. Let's

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<v Speaker 2>oh wow, this is quite a because it does take

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<v Speaker 2>you do get the texture of chewing gum at first,

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<v Speaker 2>then you realize it's wow. I love these, These are

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<v Speaker 2>great squashies.

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<v Speaker 3>Bus.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't think you no, I think that's the idea.

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<v Speaker 2>You see that the union jack right there, made in

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<v Speaker 2>the UK. Sure, I'll try one. I love the squishies

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<v Speaker 2>so far. Those are the best there. They all go

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<v Speaker 2>wine gum.

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<v Speaker 3>Do you think it has wine inside? Hmmm, very chewy.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it's like a wine gum.

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<v Speaker 3>It's weird. There's like just like bubble gum.

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<v Speaker 2>It's kind of like off putting it first, but it's

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<v Speaker 2>actually pretty yummy, just like.

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<v Speaker 3>A gummy bear.

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<v Speaker 2>No, I don't know what's wine about it.

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<v Speaker 3>Is it shaped like wine? No? No, not really, I

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<v Speaker 3>do like it.

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<v Speaker 2>Just want to make sure before I finished the letters.

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<v Speaker 2>There's nothing else wrapping here, all right, It's not you

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<v Speaker 2>may wish to, Okay. Previously I have gifted you some

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<v Speaker 2>obscure curos of British WCW merchandise from the early nineties

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<v Speaker 2>in the form of the WCW SuperSlam board game. We

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<v Speaker 2>remember that boss in the first unrapping in the ww

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<v Speaker 2>SuperSlam card game and the second unrappening. This time I

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<v Speaker 2>present something from the same lineage, but more modern. Okay.

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<v Speaker 2>The gifts this time around are the Top Trump's card games.

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<v Speaker 2>Want a retro WWFE pac of regular tops Trumps, where

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<v Speaker 2>you conduct a battle based on wrestler stats to beat

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<v Speaker 2>your opponent and collect all the cards. The second is

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<v Speaker 2>a top Trump's WW quiz game to test the depth

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<v Speaker 2>of your WW knowledge. Let's hope the information is more

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<v Speaker 2>accurate than the folk given on the Super Slam cards.

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<v Speaker 2>Though I always was curious why Sid SuperSlam card stated

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<v Speaker 2>that sid vicious catchphrase was they sent a case of

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<v Speaker 2>Vienna sausages to my church. Well we know, and I

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<v Speaker 2>sent them a side picture of me. But TLF has

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<v Speaker 2>finally been able to resolve this after all these years.

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<v Speaker 2>As for the confectionery, we have Swizzles, drum Sticks, Squashies.

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<v Speaker 3>Right here.

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<v Speaker 2>These are manufactured locally here in Derbyshire and despite having

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<v Speaker 2>one of their newer lines, are probably the most popular

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<v Speaker 2>sweets that Swizzles produces. I got every flavor I could find,

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<v Speaker 2>six in total. Wow, there's more in here.

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<v Speaker 3>Wow.

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<v Speaker 2>Some of the flavor combos are very British, such as

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<v Speaker 2>rhubarb and custard.

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<v Speaker 3>That's amazing, Like is that one flavor rhubarb and custard?

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<v Speaker 3>Or is this one sour cherry and apple? Okay, this

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<v Speaker 3>one is.

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<v Speaker 2>Banana and blueberry flavor. Weird squashies with pictures of minions

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<v Speaker 2>on them. Brother, British candy is something else. British candy

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<v Speaker 2>is like a.

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<v Speaker 3>Whole We've gotten a lot of it. Category weird. It's

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<v Speaker 3>so weird. I mean it's good, I mean weird and

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<v Speaker 3>like that, it's so bad. It's just weird that.

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<v Speaker 2>Here's the custard flavor.

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<v Speaker 3>Yes, I did to yeah, yeah, yeah, so it is

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<v Speaker 3>rubarb and custard, like that's so weird, Mama sorrow.

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<v Speaker 2>And they don't have an extra wrapping, no, right, the

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<v Speaker 2>silophane on top of it, what do you think? And

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<v Speaker 2>custard like bubble gum really m hm hm no, don't

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<v Speaker 2>taste custard. Mmm. I get what they're going for. Okay, well,

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<v Speaker 2>I get that very subtle rhubarb, but rubarb is kind

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<v Speaker 2>of tart, so you wouldn't expect it to taste anything

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<v Speaker 2>but tart.

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<v Speaker 3>I like it.

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<v Speaker 2>I like the bubble gum ones better and look forward

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<v Speaker 2>to trying the sour cherry and apple as well. We

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<v Speaker 2>also have strawberry and cream flavored drumsticks.

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<v Speaker 1>Original raspberry and milk. Raspberry and milk.

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<v Speaker 3>I mean, jesus, you know what the funny thing is.

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<v Speaker 3>It just seems British, you know, like the last thing

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<v Speaker 3>I'd ever expect raspberries and milk, but.

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<v Speaker 2>Marks and Spencer, Percy Pigs and Colin Caterpillar. These sweets

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<v Speaker 2>are British favorites.

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<v Speaker 3>Right here.

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<v Speaker 2>Percy Pig Merry pursemisay, often imitated but never bettered, and

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<v Speaker 2>sold by everyone's favorite posh food haul. This is posh.

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<v Speaker 2>Excuse me, Nancy Candy. Let's try Percy Pig Merry pursemus

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<v Speaker 2>made with real fruit juice. It doesn't really tell you

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<v Speaker 2>what it is on the package, but here you go,

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<v Speaker 2>Merry Purse, Miss Mama Sorrow Percy, Miss Percy. Miss, oh no,

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<v Speaker 2>this man dropped on the floor. He's gonna eat it anyway.

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<v Speaker 3>Another one.

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<v Speaker 2>What do you think you like these?

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<v Speaker 3>Hmm?

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<v Speaker 2>What are you getting? What's the flavor explained to people?

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<v Speaker 2>It doesn't say, there's no indication what it's supposed to

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<v Speaker 2>taste like. It just is made with real fruit juice

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<v Speaker 2>and the flavor is apparently merry Percy Miss.

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<v Speaker 3>So we'll go back.

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<v Speaker 2>Do you say.

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<v Speaker 3>It's just the fruit juice? Yeah? This is definitely healthy.

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<v Speaker 2>Definitely not really, it doesn't really give you an indication.

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<v Speaker 2>Let's take a taste.

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<v Speaker 1>Hm hmm, it's like a very.

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<v Speaker 3>Soft foamy like that.

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<v Speaker 1>I like that texture over there, very weird.

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<v Speaker 2>It's very It's like a bubble gum that you can swallow.

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<v Speaker 3>Very makes you feel very uncomfortable.

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<v Speaker 2>Wine gums. We tasted those jelly babies, foam shrimps, foam bananas,

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<v Speaker 2>sweet shop favorites that are uniquely British, all very good

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<v Speaker 2>while being a little different. And what gift for me

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<v Speaker 2>would be complete without British pub snacks who gave us

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<v Speaker 2>the here we go scampy chips. I present to you

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<v Speaker 2>mini cheddars in cheddar?

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<v Speaker 3>What many? What does that even mean?

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<v Speaker 2>We read lester and barbecue flavors. These go particularly well

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<v Speaker 2>with a pint of real cask ale, the barbecue with

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<v Speaker 2>a hoppy pail ale in particular. And finally we have

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<v Speaker 2>pork scratchings, a meaty delicacy. What the fuck that are

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<v Speaker 2>ubiquitous staple and all good British pubs. Boss, would you

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<v Speaker 2>like to try some original scratching scratching double cook pork crackling.

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<v Speaker 3>Well as long as a double double cooked. Yep, you

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<v Speaker 3>know this is My wife always makes fun of my

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<v Speaker 3>my lack of softball skills, baseball skills, and then I'd

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<v Speaker 3>love to It's like an open up the damn bage'.

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<v Speaker 2>That's asking a lot.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh, here we go. They are like the little packages here.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, would you like to try a pork crackling. That's

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<v Speaker 2>a no double double cooked, a real. I get the

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<v Speaker 2>feelings to be like beef jerky maybe or like a no.

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<v Speaker 3>It's like crunching, Chris. It's it's like, yeah, that's a

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<v Speaker 3>good noise.

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<v Speaker 2>Boss made a face there. I don't know if that

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<v Speaker 2>was good or bad.

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<v Speaker 3>Weird like crunching and then soft really all right, what.

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<v Speaker 2>Do you think?

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<v Speaker 3>It's pretty good? Actually? Whoa right? What the hell was that?

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<v Speaker 3>I know? It's like it it's crunching and then all

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<v Speaker 3>of a sudden it like the melt.

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<v Speaker 2>Try one.

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<v Speaker 3>It's like bacon. It's like it's like dried bacon.

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<v Speaker 2>See, everyone makes a face because all of a sudden

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<v Speaker 2>there's a soft inside to it. But then it disappears.

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<v Speaker 3>Well, it's like it melts in your mouth, like side

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<v Speaker 3>of American.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, flavor a flavor.

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<v Speaker 3>It's porks. It's pork stuff, pork porks.

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<v Speaker 2>The real pork crackling. Yeah, pork rhyme seasoning. Yeah, it's

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<v Speaker 2>pork rime with some soyer protein, rusk, calcium carbonate and

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<v Speaker 2>other things you don't want to know about. They make

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<v Speaker 2>it extremely hard to read this packaging.

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<v Speaker 3>It's like black because they don't because they don't want

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<v Speaker 3>you to know what it is.

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<v Speaker 2>That's the only take a wow, the real port crackling.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, so weird. That's very British that that texture is bizarre.

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<v Speaker 2>Yours and Lapstom, Philip Baine, while we're eating good in

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<v Speaker 2>the neighborhood, absolutely from the colonies to you. We want

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<v Speaker 2>to thank you very much Philip for your general and

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<v Speaker 2>your thoughtful selection. These are things we otherwise would never

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<v Speaker 2>taste and we get to have here of this Christmas

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<v Speaker 2>thanks to folks like you.

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<v Speaker 3>Safety.

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<v Speaker 2>Thank you very much and we'll see you next time

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<v Speaker 2>on the TLF Christmas showing.

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<v Speaker 1>Persidais Play is a production of the Labs Entertainment Group.

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<v Speaker 1>Its content is intended for preven use only. Truly sorry,

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<v Speaker 1>we want