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Speaker 1: It's a walk and way of life when you openly

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admit to yourself that creativity is an addiction. It answers

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so many questions and gives you peace of mind, especially

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late at night. Unplugged because we will always say yes

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to creativity, totally uncut because we all make mistakes, So

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turn it into a tool. This is arrow unplugged, hey Taro,

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And this is dfrag. This is where you come to

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ask questions and you question the answers. Oh, you don't

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ask me, You ask yourself. You have that relationship with yourself.

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So often we find ourselves in a position of just

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being alone. You can even have people around you and

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you feel alone. But we don't ask the questions, nor

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do we chase down the answers, because we settle for

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one answer and we think everything's okay with that one answer.

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But we don't question the answers. And that's what defragging

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is all about. It's about breaking stuff down. Now we're

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getting ready to go out.

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Speaker 2: Onto our transition walk right now throughout the forest, which

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is what we do every day. And the thing is

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is that today we've lost an hour of sleep because

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of daylight savings time and what else has happened. Well,

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it's raining, so we got to prepare for that, because

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if I don't put myself in a position of asking

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the questions and questioning the answers, then I'm not being

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fair to you with my own personal defragging. And that's

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what we're going to put focus on, is the defragging

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that we all need to be doing. And one of

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the subjects that we're going to deal with today. You

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can't fake the smile without getting caught in the corner

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of someone's eye. You can't fake the smile without getting

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caught in the corner of someone's eye. All right, I'll

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see out in the forest. Okay, we're out in the forest.

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It's cold. It's early March, which means it's damp in

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the air. The atmosphere is biting, and this is the

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time of season where the Carolinas come under attack, which

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really plays hell on your mind, body, and soul. When

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weather is an acting the way that we want it to,

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then it's going to play. It's going to play your senses.

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It's going to play your game, but a game of

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negativity more than positive energy. So what happens is is

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that we put on the candy coat of bathroom mirror smile,

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the fake smile. But you can't fake smile unless you're

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caught in the corner of someone's eye. That's our subject.

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I'm d Frek, and of course ask the question, the

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question is what is that even about? What does that mean?

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Come on, we all do it, We all have fake smiles.

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That's one of my weaknesses. I'll call it a weakness.

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And the reason why I see it as a weakness

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more than a strength is because I've been accused multiple

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times of hey, can I get the real you instead

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of this person who thinks everything is always great? And

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at that point in time, I always want to look

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at it and say, when did I ever say that

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everything was great? I tend to believe that I walked

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toward the fire to help put out the fire. I

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don't run away from the fire. But the thing is

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is that you can't have a fake smile without getting

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caught in the corner of someone's eye. In other words,

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those moments where you've got that little determination in you

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that says, I'm not ready to go to the fire.

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I think I'm gonna step to the side and let

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somebody else run for me. A superior a wife, a father,

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somebody that has mentored you sees your moment of doubt,

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and all of a sudden, in the corner of their eye,

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they see that in the way of you not showing

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off that fake smile, that fake determination, that realism about

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the everyday world. I'm not saying that it's not real.

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It's very real. It is a mechanism where you can

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go home and you can really strengthen your inner Cora

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by thinking positive. But you can't fake a smile without

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getting caught in the corner of someone's eye. I have

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a coworker who was told to change her facial expressions

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by a department manager. I was offended. I mean I

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really was offended for the person because you want to

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know what her comment to me was, don't people realize

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that I have a resting bitch face? Now? That hurt me.

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That hurt me because I've never thought of this person

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having a resting bitch face. But to have a superior

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somebody in the corner of their eye catch this particular

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person without a smile forces that person to go into

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a mode of fake smile. Me. I live it. I

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know what it's like. There are so many things that

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are moving through my head at the essential job, the thoughts,

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the planning, the exercises, and then when I see somebody

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that I I know, boom, Instantly that smile is put

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into place. Hey, what's going on? You guys doing good?

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Do you think that's real? Do you think they feel

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it's real? My fake smile was probably caught in the

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corner of their eye as we defrag on this thirty

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seven degree day with light rain, cold out here in

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this forest, it's very quiet. The lake doesn't have any

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ripples in it except for the little droplets of water.

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But as we defrag this and we talk about getting

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caught in the corner of other people's eyes, what about

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our own eyes, our own steps of how we're growing.

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How many times have we faked having the right attitude

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in a situation where you know things are going down.

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You know, we've all seen those Hollywood movies where the

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captain of the ship isn't going to jump, He's going

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to stay there until that ship goes underwater. Sometimes we

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are put in positions like that on our self made

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journeys when the moment has gotten too tough. We fake

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the ambition, We fake the dedication, the loyalty, the determination

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because we caught ourselves with the fake moment. That's one

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of the reasons why I like to defrag, because I'll

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break that stuff down and when I put it on paper,

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I'll ask the next question. That'll just keep breaking it

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down until I understand the full process of what is

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taking place. Stephen Ferdick recently described such situations like that

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as being that God is upstream and we're downstream. We

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can sit here and try to predict what our lives

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are going to be like every single day, and we'll

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put on that face, we'll put on our big boy pants,

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and we'll get on that trail. We'll make it work.

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But then what happens when it goes wrong? Then we

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have to reconvince ourselves that, look, man, we all have

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struggles in our everyday world. I'm gonna fake it until

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I make it. Oh you've heard that term before, right, Yeah?

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Fake smiling the corner of someone else's eye they see us.

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You're always being seen, haven't you learned that from all

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of these videos that are catching these crazy moments in

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history and there were no camera people there from the

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television stations. I really do work with people that base

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their day on my attitude. Well, boy, the pressure's on there,

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isn't it. Doesn't that serve as an invitation for me

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to create the fake smile? Yeah, because the corner of

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their eyes are catching me, and so they know that

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if the weather's going to be rough, or if we've

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lost an hour of sleep, oh, that's going to affect

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this guy. Well man, this has been a tough morning.

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I don't need this guy to be negative when he

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gets here. He needs to be upbeat because too many

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people depend on that upbeatness. They do realize that I

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have to do things in order to get into that

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state of mind that is a fake I transition like

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these transition walks him on right now, I dfrag. I

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don't go anywhere in any time of my day unless

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I have defragged it. I'm not trying to plan it out.

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I'm not trying to sit there and think that this

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is going to happen. This better happen. If it doesn't happen,

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I'm gonna have a fit. Why didn't it happen? That's

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not what defragging is all about. It's knowing the mindset

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without having to fake the journey, rememories, fake smiles are

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an everyday part of our life. I often wonder at

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the Essential Job if those who are our guests aren't

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thinking a smile when they see me, because you know,

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it's like, you know, we all live in this tangled

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mess of life, but you don't want to get caught

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in a stumble or a moment of falling down, so

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you put on the candy coated plastic bathroom mirror smile.

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So for admitting to each other on this episode of

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Defrag that we do have fake smiles, we use our

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fake smiles to our benefit. And if you do have

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resting bitch face and someone tells you you've got to

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change your facial expressions, Jesus, that's a lot of pressure

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right there. The question is is how do we make

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a genuine smile? Because I really, seriously I would love

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to see the numbers of people who really are very

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proud of being at their places, at position, at work.

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And can you do that at a radio program? Director?

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Tell me one time he goes because everybody thinks they

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can do radio, and yeah, they can come in here.

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I'll give them that chance. Come on here, I'll put

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you on the microphone, I'll let you fill in those efforts,

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But can you do it six days a week, seven

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to nine hours a day in that studio. Now, I'm

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going to ask you, even play radio, your job is

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a little different, your career, your dreams. We all have

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these personal visions of what we want to do and

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what we want to become. But the thing is is

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that are you faking it or are you truly enjoying

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the adventure? Podcasting is definitely one of those for me,

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you know, twenty twelve when I jumped into it. I

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know why I've jumped into it. There's two reasons. Reason

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Number one, I was trying to find better ways to

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get our clients, the advertisers, more time, more than just

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sixty seconds, fifteen seconds or a five second abbot. I

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wanted these people, I love them so much, I have

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more time, and I stopped podcasting and being oh my god.

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Well the company didn't see it that way in twenty twelve,

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not like they do today. And the other reason why

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I jumped into it is because I no longer had

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a position of sharing conversation in terrestrial radio. The station

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that I had named for had pretty much gone to

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no Keeland thought it was all going to be done

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by the computer. Pretty strange for a creative persons whose

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whole entire life was based on sharing conversation on in

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terrestrial radio. But now I could do this thing called podcasting.

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But the thing is is that in twenty twelve and

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we're in twenty twenty three, Well, it's been one hell

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of a journey of fake smiles, fake ambitions, fake stories.

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And the reason why is because I've had to motivate

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the self to expect the hardcore business side of podcasting.

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You know, it's not all about just getting on that

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microphone and talking. It's there's so much involved in that.

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And I believe that your personal life is the same way,

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but they don't show you that along the way that manual.

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But we get that your creation before you're you know,

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you're coming into the world. For some reason, we leave

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it at the door. And then when we come into

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the world, we.

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Speaker 3: Think, God, we got this, we got it, I'm gonna

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grow up, I'm gonna be this, I'm gonna do that,

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And then without even notice, something changes in your life

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and everything get gripped of being or becoming, stands still

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and we shape.

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Speaker 2: You know, he says, you can't fake a smile, and

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so you're cut in the corner of someone's And so

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you have this desire of being what a musician, chef,

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someone who runs a bank? What is your desire? You

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want to run a retail store? Beautiful? But what gets

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in the way? Is it your faith smile and you

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setting yourself for good? Or is it somebody saying do

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you got a change? The expression I've got rest in

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a bitch face? Man, what am I supposed to do?

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That's what I mean. You've got to figure out three

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G fagging, asking questions, questioning the answers. Where are do

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you hold a job or a career only because the

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money is good? I had a former manager. I saw

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her yesterday and we talked about that very subject. I

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asked her, Hey, how's everything going at your new job? Well?

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I got to be honest with you. You know, if

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it wasn't for the money, I'd probably beep back over here.

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But I can't sacrifice the money. Oh guess what just happened.

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I just caught her with a faint smile in the

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corner of my eyes. That's how we are living these

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days now. I'm not saying that if he innocently started

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defraggings dead that your world is going to become perfect.

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It doesn't happen that way. I've been defragging in my

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journal since November of twenty seventeen, and each day that

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I defragged, I find out a little bit more, a

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little bit more. You start taking those letters and you

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create sentences. It reminds me so much of martial arts.

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It's that everybody quists once they get a black belt.

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I got my black belts. Yeah, I'm a black belt artist.

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Now that's so cool. But you know what, it's just

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a chapter of the journey. The thing that I've learned

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as a martial artist is that all the belts below

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a black belt are nothing but letters in the alphabet.

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And you become a black belt, you learn how to

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put words together. Your second degree. Now you're putting paragraphs together.

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Your third degree. Now you're maybe writing a page. It's

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a growing process. Religion and spirituality is no different. You

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add to the journey the story. But if you're going

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to fake a smile while not wanting to get caught

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in the corner of someone's eye, then you've got to

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really put on the genuine smile, the authentic self with

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the vision of who you truly are and how you

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are in tune with what you're going to become. Yes,

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it's going to change. Yes you're going to have fake smiles. Yes,

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it's all there. But when you have a fake smile moment,

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ask the questions, question and ask this, get to know

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what put you in that moment? What was your figgure?

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I'm eron and that's the drivers