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<v Speaker 1>Welcome to Hacking Your Leadership.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm Chris and I'm Lorenzo.

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<v Speaker 3>And Lorenzo on this episode, I want to talk a

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<v Speaker 3>little bit about keeping.

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<v Speaker 1>It real, keeping it real.

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<v Speaker 2>Let's let's take it back to the nineties on a

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<v Speaker 2>throwback here.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I'm all for it. Yeah for sure.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm picturing the motivational speaker coming into the auditorium at

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<v Speaker 3>the high school and flipping the chair around backwards to

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<v Speaker 3>make it seem like they're, you know, gonna relate to us.

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<v Speaker 1>You know exactly, They're gonna keep it real. Yeah, Okay.

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<v Speaker 3>I want to talk about keeping it real from the

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<v Speaker 3>standpoint of personal brand because I had an interaction with

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<v Speaker 3>someone recently who who came off differently than I know

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<v Speaker 3>them to be. And it wasn't a big deal for

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<v Speaker 3>me because I've interact with this personal lot and it

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<v Speaker 3>just was a little out of character for them. But

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<v Speaker 3>there were two other people with me in that room

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<v Speaker 3>who didn't interact with this person very often, maybe not

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<v Speaker 3>ever before for one of them, and then one maybe

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<v Speaker 3>have been several months or a year since the last

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<v Speaker 3>time they interacted with them. And I found myself thinking

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<v Speaker 3>that's interesting that that they would do this, they would

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<v Speaker 3>they would kind of react to something in this way.

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<v Speaker 3>It just seemed it seemed a little kind of off

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<v Speaker 3>the cuff and more of an emotional reaction than than

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<v Speaker 3>it should have been. And I said something to them

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<v Speaker 3>after the fact, but after the other two people had

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<v Speaker 3>left the room around this idea of how important it

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<v Speaker 3>is that people see you in the way that you

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<v Speaker 3>want them to see you. And and and I don't

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<v Speaker 3>want to confuse this with being inauthentic. I want to

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<v Speaker 3>make sure this is in the in the context of

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<v Speaker 3>being authentic, but then understanding that no matter who you are,

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<v Speaker 3>you have days where you are you're you're out of

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<v Speaker 3>character a little bit like where either you're something's bothering

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<v Speaker 3>you or on your mind, or you having a bad

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<v Speaker 3>day anyway, or whatever whatever it is, reactions to things

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<v Speaker 3>are different than they would be ninety nine out of

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<v Speaker 3>one hundred other times. But what that can do to

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<v Speaker 3>people who happen to just be around you for that

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<v Speaker 3>one time can be really detrimental in terms of your

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<v Speaker 3>ability to lead people and form relationships with people. And

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<v Speaker 3>so I want to talk about this a little bit

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<v Speaker 3>because I think there's a lot of people out there

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<v Speaker 3>who think that, oh, you know, I'm on ninety nine

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<v Speaker 3>percent of the time. I'm on nine hundred ninety nine

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<v Speaker 3>point nine percent of the time. What's up with the

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<v Speaker 3>every once in a while.

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<v Speaker 1>Kind of thing.

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<v Speaker 3>It's like, well, it depends on who's around, right, and

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<v Speaker 3>it can be a big deal.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I think especially the context of leadership, you know,

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<v Speaker 2>the reality is like, and we talk about it all

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<v Speaker 2>the time, it's like you're you know, you're always on stage,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, and again, just because you're on stage doesn't

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<v Speaker 2>mean that you have to not be yourself or act

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<v Speaker 2>like a different person. It does mean though, that people

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<v Speaker 2>are always watching. There's you know, there's conversations you're gonna have,

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<v Speaker 2>there's comments that you're gonna make, there's things that you're

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<v Speaker 2>going to do unintentionally many times because of the role

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<v Speaker 2>that you have and the responsibility that you have and

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<v Speaker 2>in many instances like the authority that you have, and

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<v Speaker 2>that's really important part of that work. I think as

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<v Speaker 2>you're talking about it though, like in a personal branding standpoint,

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<v Speaker 2>there's also a really big important thing around consistency and

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<v Speaker 2>you know, making sure that you are showing up in

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<v Speaker 2>the way that you know you not only want to

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<v Speaker 2>for the role or the responsibility of the job, but

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<v Speaker 2>so that people can get know who you are actually right,

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<v Speaker 2>and and and being authentic I think is important. But

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<v Speaker 2>you know, I think showcasing and and and making sure

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<v Speaker 2>especially with audiences like you pointed out, like the two

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<v Speaker 2>other people, when when you're around people that you're meeting

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<v Speaker 2>for the first time or that you don't get a

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<v Speaker 2>whole lot of time with there are, that's a really

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<v Speaker 2>important thing to make sure that you're intentional with who

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<v Speaker 2>you are and with and with what you're talking about,

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<v Speaker 2>the energy that you bring, the things that you're discussing,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, all these things really really matter because that's

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<v Speaker 2>a limitted amount of time that that individual or those

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<v Speaker 2>those people might have with you, and that's the things

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<v Speaker 2>they are going to take away, right, And so I

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<v Speaker 2>think that it's it's it's a really important thing to

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<v Speaker 2>always consider because again, you could walk in and maybe

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<v Speaker 2>be slightly out of character. If if I know that

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<v Speaker 2>you're slightly out of character to your point, I'll just

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<v Speaker 2>kind of like yeah, like you know, I'll just kind

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<v Speaker 2>of like write it off. But if that's the only

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<v Speaker 2>is if somebody else's first time meeting you, or those

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<v Speaker 2>small elements of time with you, that's who you are

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<v Speaker 2>to them, yep, and that could that can cause you know,

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<v Speaker 2>that can cause some some some potential harm or conflict

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<v Speaker 2>in the future if they are operating under the belief

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<v Speaker 2>that that's who you are or how you lead in

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<v Speaker 2>those types of moments.

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<v Speaker 1>Right.

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<v Speaker 3>I think where leaders get tripped up on this is

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<v Speaker 3>it's less about the people who they're around constantly. Like

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<v Speaker 3>you think about the ten people you interact with most

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<v Speaker 3>in your in your day to day and and you

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<v Speaker 3>and these are people you see at least five times

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<v Speaker 3>or more a week interacting with them.

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<v Speaker 1>It's not those people.

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<v Speaker 3>And actually I don't think it's people that they that

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<v Speaker 3>you meet for the first time. I think a lot

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<v Speaker 3>of people are very cognizant about putting out the kind

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<v Speaker 3>of the ara they want to put out to the

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<v Speaker 3>world when meeting somebody for the first time. I think

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<v Speaker 3>the danger zone here is in people that leaders interact

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<v Speaker 3>with very infrequently but often enough. Where in there in

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<v Speaker 3>the leader's.

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<v Speaker 1>Own mind, it's it's often right.

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<v Speaker 3>So if you interact with a person you know once

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<v Speaker 3>or twice a month, then you know the what that

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<v Speaker 3>person believes of who you are is just kind of

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<v Speaker 3>the aggregate of maybe the last ten or twelve interactions

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<v Speaker 3>that they've had with you. And if you happen to have,

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<v Speaker 3>you know, two of those, let's say two out of

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<v Speaker 3>the last four are not the brand that you want

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<v Speaker 3>to put out In your mind, You're thinking, oh, yeah,

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<v Speaker 3>I interact with this person all the time, but do

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<v Speaker 3>you like, do you really interact with this person all

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<v Speaker 3>the time? And when I say interact, I don't mean

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<v Speaker 3>standing in front of a group of people they happen

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<v Speaker 3>to be in.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't mean, you know, sending an email to them.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm mean a one on one interaction that that exits

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<v Speaker 3>the context of getting a specific agenda item done on work. Right,

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<v Speaker 3>So if you're if you're talking about a specific thing

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<v Speaker 3>for work, then that doesn't count.

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<v Speaker 1>This is the the outside of that.

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<v Speaker 3>How how do you interact with people when you're talking

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<v Speaker 3>about what's important to them, or or career development conversations

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<v Speaker 3>or or accountability conversations, all of those things are what

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<v Speaker 3>lead a person to have to create what they believe

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<v Speaker 3>your brand is. And the people who you interact with

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<v Speaker 3>very infrequently but still kind of a few times here

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<v Speaker 3>and there, those are the people I think this is

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<v Speaker 3>this is most likely to happen with, and where leaders

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<v Speaker 3>kind of get tripped up.

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<v Speaker 1>I'll tell you I had an.

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<v Speaker 3>Interaction with a leader very recently that I thought was

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<v Speaker 3>I thought was really well done. This person was scheduled

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<v Speaker 3>to run a meeting that I was to be a

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<v Speaker 3>part of along with you know a few other PEOP people,

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<v Speaker 3>and they came up to me and said, I'm going

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<v Speaker 3>to have to cancel the meeting today.

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<v Speaker 1>And I said, oh, what happened? What's wrong?

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<v Speaker 3>And they said, you know, I'm just not I'm not

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<v Speaker 3>feeling myself right now, Like I'm not feeling like I

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<v Speaker 3>could be the person that I need to be in

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<v Speaker 3>this room having these conversations right now, and I'm worried

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<v Speaker 3>that I will come off the wrong way or that

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<v Speaker 3>I won't be listening correctly. I won't be I won't

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<v Speaker 3>be in the proper headspace to do what needs to

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<v Speaker 3>be done with the information in this meeting.

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<v Speaker 1>So I want to push it by a few days.

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<v Speaker 3>And I was like wow, like okay, Like just from

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<v Speaker 3>a standpoint of humility, vulnerability and kind of accepting of

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<v Speaker 3>the situation, I think about the other ways that could

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<v Speaker 3>have gone right, So that person thinks it's my job

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<v Speaker 3>as a leader to be on my game all the time.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm not allowed to have a time when I'm not

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<v Speaker 3>on stage.

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<v Speaker 1>And and so I'm.

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<v Speaker 3>Going to go into this and then that, and then

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<v Speaker 3>people in the room who interact with this person maybe

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<v Speaker 3>once or twice a month, if that, they get the

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<v Speaker 3>wrong impression about them because they weren't in the right

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<v Speaker 3>head they weren't in the right head space. They didn't

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<v Speaker 3>bring the you know, the proper brand to that to

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<v Speaker 3>that meeting room. And I think it ties right back

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<v Speaker 3>into to what you're saying when it comes to being

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<v Speaker 3>on stage. So I think you're right, you're always on stage.

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<v Speaker 3>But I think that you have the ability to exit

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<v Speaker 3>the stage as a leader if you want to. You

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<v Speaker 3>just have to be honest and transparent and vulnerable about

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<v Speaker 3>the reasons why, and you will be given a lot

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<v Speaker 3>of grace by people. The failure of leaders come from

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<v Speaker 3>thinking that either a they're not allowed to leave the stage,

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<v Speaker 3>or that be they're allowed to be not they're allowed

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<v Speaker 3>to be not judged by something they do while they

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<v Speaker 3>are on stage because it's oh, it's just one time

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<v Speaker 3>out of out of out of many.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, you know, it's a good call out because I

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<v Speaker 2>think to your point, like being a leader and signing

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<v Speaker 2>up for that and being on stage doesn't mean that

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<v Speaker 2>you always, like to your point, I always have to

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<v Speaker 2>be performing. And I actually think it's a great call

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<v Speaker 2>because when when I think you've got it down best

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<v Speaker 2>is when you've been able to kind of show the

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<v Speaker 2>audience that you are the same person on and off stage.

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<v Speaker 2>But when you are on stage, there's a responsibility that

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<v Speaker 2>you have, and that is to in in you know,

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<v Speaker 2>in the acting world, that's to act and put on

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<v Speaker 2>a performance. In the leadership world, that is to make

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<v Speaker 2>sure that your teams are are learning and growing and

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<v Speaker 2>achieving goals every single day. So it's kind of like

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<v Speaker 2>I'm the same person on stage or off stage, but

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<v Speaker 2>I do understand that there's a responsibility when I'm on stage, yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>and and that that responsibility can also, like you know,

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<v Speaker 2>it can it can also pour over into when you're

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<v Speaker 2>not you know, in in the leadership roles, I think

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<v Speaker 2>about having having interactions with people like at work in

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<v Speaker 2>meetings kind of in social working environments, versus those same

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<v Speaker 2>people at maybe like an off site event where it's

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<v Speaker 2>like it's a meeting, it's a holiday meeting. It's fun,

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<v Speaker 2>there's things that are going on. Like it's the same

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<v Speaker 2>people and these are people that you work with, but

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<v Speaker 2>there is a different element where you can be off

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<v Speaker 2>stage a little bit more because of the environment around

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<v Speaker 2>you and and and kind of what that comes with,

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<v Speaker 2>you know what I mean, Like I just think of like,

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<v Speaker 2>am I a different person there? No, am I much

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<v Speaker 2>more relaxed to have like more I don't know, like

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<v Speaker 2>informal conversations, but like the intent of the time together

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<v Speaker 2>is to connect in a more social way. So I

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<v Speaker 2>could be more social social and no spaces, but at

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<v Speaker 2>the same time, like I'm well aware that like I'm

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<v Speaker 2>there and if I'm the boss or I'm in charge,

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<v Speaker 2>like I still have to play a role in that

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<v Speaker 2>space true a degree, it just may be very different.

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<v Speaker 2>So I don't know, just kind of talking it out loud,

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<v Speaker 2>I think that I think that the closer you can

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<v Speaker 2>get to being who you are both on and off

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<v Speaker 2>stage with your people, that it's going to require time

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<v Speaker 2>and effort, but I think it allows there to be

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<v Speaker 2>a more authentic and real relationship that you can have

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<v Speaker 2>with everyone.

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<v Speaker 3>I kind of like what you said there, because I

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<v Speaker 3>think it kind of it kind of tied everything together

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<v Speaker 3>in my own head here, it requires time on and

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<v Speaker 3>off stage for people to get the right impression of

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<v Speaker 3>you in terms of for people to believe that what

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<v Speaker 3>they're seeing is accurate. So and when I say on

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<v Speaker 3>and off stage, i'm talking about in the context of

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<v Speaker 3>what you said, where you're kind of always on stage,

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<v Speaker 3>but you might have different responsibilities, right, So, so as

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<v Speaker 3>a leader, whether you're interacting around a bonfire at the beach,

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<v Speaker 3>you know, on a on a you know, team kind

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<v Speaker 3>of a get together holiday celebration because you know, and

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<v Speaker 3>not work related at all, but but but put on

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<v Speaker 3>by word, how you interact there versus how you interact

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<v Speaker 3>in front of a group of people at work, it's

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<v Speaker 3>going to be different because you have different responsibilities.

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<v Speaker 1>But you are on stage for both.

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<v Speaker 3>So they everybody's looking to you for how you're going

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<v Speaker 3>to be acting, But what they're looking to do is

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<v Speaker 3>validate or or throw out things they already believe about you.

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<v Speaker 1>So they go into these.

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<v Speaker 3>Interactions thinking what they know about Lorenzo. Oh, I think

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<v Speaker 3>he's this and this and this. Let's watch him, let's

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<v Speaker 3>see let's see if he's that still, because the interactions

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<v Speaker 3>they get with you at work are probably far more

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<v Speaker 3>often than the interactions they get with you not at work.

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<v Speaker 3>But I think it takes both for a person to

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<v Speaker 3>feel more confident in believing that who you say you

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<v Speaker 3>are is actually who you are, and because because I

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<v Speaker 3>think it's it's probably easier for a person to always

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<v Speaker 3>kind of put on whatever mask they want to put

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<v Speaker 3>on for work if that's all they ever interact with

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<v Speaker 3>with a person is at work, it's a lot harder

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<v Speaker 3>to keep that mask on over a period of multiple

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<v Speaker 3>hours when when you aren't in the context of work,

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<v Speaker 3>it becomes kind of very freeing and open. It's it's

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<v Speaker 3>why you have the the movie and sitcom tropes of

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<v Speaker 3>the people you know, you know, photo copying their bare

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<v Speaker 3>butt in the photocopy machine at the holiday party. It's like, like, well,

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<v Speaker 3>they would never do that when they were at work,

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<v Speaker 3>but something happens at the holiday party where they think, oh,

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<v Speaker 3>it's different. You know. It's like, yeah, it it is different.

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<v Speaker 3>But that just means there's a different level of responsibility.

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<v Speaker 3>And so I think as a leader, you need to

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<v Speaker 3>be cognizant of that fact and I like that kind

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<v Speaker 3>of that.

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<v Speaker 1>Juxtaposition of it.

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<v Speaker 3>So you are always on stage, but you have different responsibilities,

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<v Speaker 3>and people need to see you with the different hats

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<v Speaker 3>on of different responsibilities and be able to leave those

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<v Speaker 3>interactions thinking, Okay, that's a different hat, but it's not

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<v Speaker 3>a different mask. It's not a mask of who they are.

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<v Speaker 3>It's just an acknowledgment that they're here to do different

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<v Speaker 3>things depending on what the context of the situation is.

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<v Speaker 2>Yep, I totally agree with that, and with that it

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<v Speaker 2>brings us to this episode one minute hack. But first

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<v Speaker 2>a few words from our sponsors.

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<v Speaker 3>All right, for this episode's one minute hack, what I

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<v Speaker 3>want you to do is realize that for a person

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<v Speaker 3>to have a personal brand that people see them by,

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<v Speaker 3>it's not enough to just act.

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<v Speaker 1>In a certain way.

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<v Speaker 3>You have to put that brand out to the world

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<v Speaker 3>in ways that people who don't interact with you often

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<v Speaker 3>can kind of absorb and take in and try to validate.

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<v Speaker 3>And that starts with the words that you use. And

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<v Speaker 3>so what I want you to do is think about

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<v Speaker 3>three different words that you want to be seen as.

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<v Speaker 3>Three different words that you would hope people would see

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<v Speaker 3>you as that are very important to you that if

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<v Speaker 3>you had to pick only three, and I want you

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<v Speaker 3>to start using those words in the context of your

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<v Speaker 3>conversations with people who you don't interact with very often.

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<v Speaker 3>So if you want to be seen as trustworthy, then

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<v Speaker 3>you just start saying that you can trust me.

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<v Speaker 1>Hey, let's talk about something. I want you to know.

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<v Speaker 1>You can trust me.

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<v Speaker 3>You know, the things that you say to people and

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<v Speaker 3>how you embody the brand that you want of yourself

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<v Speaker 3>into words does matter because people will be looking to

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<v Speaker 3>those words as kind of guide posts to see whether

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<v Speaker 3>or not your actions align with them. And the more

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<v Speaker 3>the actions align with them, the more of the brand

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<v Speaker 3>you build with that person. But if you just give

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<v Speaker 3>the actions and you haven't prefaced it with the words,

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<v Speaker 3>it's a lot less likely they'll make those tie ins.

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<v Speaker 3>It's a lot less likely that they will think that's

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<v Speaker 3>who you are as a person, and a lot more

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<v Speaker 3>likely they'll just think, oh, that's who you were at

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<v Speaker 3>that moment.

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<v Speaker 1>So they might think that they could.

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<v Speaker 3>Trust you because they told you something and you didn't

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<v Speaker 3>violate their trust, and that's fine, But if you haven't

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<v Speaker 3>told them beforehand, I want you to see me as trustworthy.

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<v Speaker 3>You can trust me. Then it doesn't hit as hard

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<v Speaker 3>and it doesn't get tied to your personal brand as much.

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<v Speaker 3>And so whatever you decide these words should be, start

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<v Speaker 3>utilizing them in the context of your conversations with people,

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<v Speaker 3>and then make sure that the actions that you do

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<v Speaker 3>obviously follow up, because you can't just say it. You

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<v Speaker 3>have to do it, or you will have the opposite

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<v Speaker 3>effect of saying it to begin with. But put your

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<v Speaker 3>brand out in words followed up by actions, and you'll

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<v Speaker 3>find that the people who you interact with less frequently

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<v Speaker 3>are a lot more likely to see you as those things,

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<v Speaker 3>and those little interactions will have more of an impact

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<v Speaker 3>in the long term.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I think it's great women hack, and I love

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<v Speaker 2>the idea of utilizing the language that you're wanting to

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<v Speaker 2>build with the team because I think that as you

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<v Speaker 2>were talking through it, I was thinking about, unintentionally, how

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<v Speaker 2>maybe I've done that in my past because I want

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<v Speaker 2>it to be something that's top of mind, and even

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<v Speaker 2>more recently having some conversations with leaders about you know,

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<v Speaker 2>if this is what you're solving for, if this is

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<v Speaker 2>what you want to be as the leader, then you

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<v Speaker 2>not only have to show it, but you have to

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<v Speaker 2>talk about it know and not not. I didn't do

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<v Speaker 2>it as maybe as polished as you kind of just

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<v Speaker 2>described there, But it is such an important thing that

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<v Speaker 2>putting it out to the world because it's also an

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<v Speaker 2>element of like kind of social accountability that if you say, hey,

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<v Speaker 2>I I you know, I want you to trust me,

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<v Speaker 2>or I want to build trust. I want to be

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<v Speaker 2>a leader that you can trust. Well, if you're not

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<v Speaker 2>showing that in your behavior, or if you're doing things

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<v Speaker 2>that may cause it, somebody can say, like, well, you're

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<v Speaker 2>making it really hard for me to trust you because

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<v Speaker 2>you're doing this. Like it creates a space where not

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<v Speaker 2>only will people hear it and and think about that

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<v Speaker 2>and say okay, I agree with that, Well, if they

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<v Speaker 2>don't see you doing the behaviors, you'll probably also get

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<v Speaker 2>challenged on them.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, that's it's absolutely a great kind of a concise

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<v Speaker 3>way of putting it because you know, the the people

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<v Speaker 3>who don't interact with you as often, they they need

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<v Speaker 3>every interaction you have with them needs to be something

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<v Speaker 3>that moves the needle in your favor, because it will

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<v Speaker 3>move the needle. Every interaction you have will either strengthen

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<v Speaker 3>or weaken the way that person sees you and the

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<v Speaker 3>way that person feels about you as a leader. Every

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<v Speaker 3>one of them does, and the less frequently you interact

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<v Speaker 3>with them, the more that needle moves, either positively or negatively,

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<v Speaker 3>because that's all they have to go off of. You

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<v Speaker 3>interact with somebody fifteen times a day, and you have

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<v Speaker 3>one bad moment over the course of a month, it's

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<v Speaker 3>not going to move that needle at all in the negative.

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<v Speaker 3>But if that one bad moment you happen to have

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<v Speaker 3>is in front of somebody else and that was the

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<v Speaker 3>only interaction they had with you for the entire month,

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<v Speaker 3>you might as well think you're starting below zero now.

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<v Speaker 3>Like this is that's the only thing that person has

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<v Speaker 3>to go off of, they might not ever reproach you again,

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<v Speaker 3>meaning if that happens, you need to be self aware

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<v Speaker 3>to know that it has happened and go directly to

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<v Speaker 3>that person to fix the broken situation because they will

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<v Speaker 3>likely not come to you with it unless they absolutely

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<v Speaker 3>have to. And so personal brand is important. Kind of

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<v Speaker 3>manifest to get in verbiage is important, and making sure

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<v Speaker 3>that you understand that you are always on stage, even

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<v Speaker 3>if you wear different hats and have different responsibilities. Very

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<v Speaker 3>important when you're talking about how you want to be

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<v Speaker 3>viewed as a person and as a leader.

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<v Speaker 2>Absolutely, and with that it resists at the end of

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<v Speaker 2>this episode, this is hacking your leadership. I'm Lorenzo and

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<v Speaker 2>I'm Chris, and we'll talk to you all next time.