Speaker 1: Welcome to Hacking Your Leadership. I'm Chris and I'm Lorenzo.
Speaker 1: And Lorenzo.
Speaker 2: On today's episode, I want to continue our discussion on
Speaker 2: the Forbes article from the Coaches Council. This is advice
Speaker 2: that coaches would give to their younger selves. We've been
Speaker 2: talking about this for a few weeks now, and there's
Speaker 2: a lot of good content in this article and a
Speaker 2: lot of great advice that coaches that really do this
Speaker 2: for a living, if they go back in time and
Speaker 2: say to their younger selves, hey, make sure you do
Speaker 2: these things too. This is the list of advice that
Speaker 2: they would give themselves, and it's put together by a
Speaker 2: lot of people who are, you know, kind of really
Speaker 2: top of their field when it comes to the game
Speaker 2: of coaching, which is becoming more and more important from
Speaker 2: a standpoint of whether or not you're an effective leader.
Speaker 2: A lot of that comes down to whether or not
Speaker 2: you're an effective coach. On this episode, I want to
Speaker 2: talk about the second to last item in this article,
Speaker 2: which is about trusting yourself and trusting your instincts. And
Speaker 2: you know, this is an interesting one because you know,
Speaker 2: I've come across people who, you know, they they trust
Speaker 2: themselves so much and their instincts so much that they
Speaker 2: stop listening to those around them, and it kind of
Speaker 2: steers them in the wrong direction because they, you know,
Speaker 2: haven't really taken the advice of those who are experts
Speaker 2: in their field. But for every one of those people,
Speaker 2: there are many more people who, for whatever reason, they
Speaker 2: just don't want to move forward with something they know
Speaker 2: kind of is the right way to go. They have
Speaker 2: the instincts, they have the knowledge and the know how
Speaker 2: to get something done, and they just don't move forward
Speaker 2: with it. It's almost like they have to have a
Speaker 2: fire lit underneath them to make something happen. And those
Speaker 2: are the people that don't trust themselves or trust their instincts.
Speaker 2: I think as you move further along in a career,
Speaker 2: you know, you you gain knowledge. And a lot of
Speaker 2: times people can be in a situation where they have
Speaker 2: the knowledge and they have the skills and they have
Speaker 2: the abilities, but for some reason they just don't think
Speaker 2: they do and that caused them to.
Speaker 1: To not move forward when they should. Yeah.
Speaker 3: I think it's you know, it's interesting because I see
Speaker 3: it pretty often and not not in like not in
Speaker 3: like this big idea of leaders that take no action
Speaker 3: at all. But like the leaders that may like I
Speaker 3: look at sometimes as like second guessing or they're they're
Speaker 3: not sure, they're looking sometimes for validation on a decision
Speaker 3: or permission to make a decision. When but when you
Speaker 3: start asking questions, they give you all the right answers
Speaker 3: and they've thought about all the right things, and they're
Speaker 3: down this path of like that's exactly what you should do.
Speaker 3: Your intuition is telling you that. And you know, I
Speaker 3: think that intuition is based upon experience over time, So
Speaker 3: it's like you experience these things and then over time
Speaker 3: you kind of understand what the right move is that
Speaker 3: you need to make.
Speaker 1: There.
Speaker 3: I think sometimes this this kind of gets tossed around
Speaker 3: into like imposter syndrome, and I think that these are
Speaker 3: different things, like like I don't, I don't I've experienced
Speaker 3: imposter syndrome. You've experienced imposter syndrome. I think there's times
Speaker 3: when we all do. But when it comes to like
Speaker 3: the context of a role that you have responsibilities that
Speaker 3: you have you are either the decision maker or a
Speaker 3: big part of making a decision, and then not maybe
Speaker 3: you know, taking the action to make that decision, there's
Speaker 3: something else at play there, and that's in my opinion,
Speaker 3: it's like it's not it's not the imposter syndrome piece
Speaker 3: of this. It is really coming down to, like, you know,
Speaker 3: what is slowing people down or stopping them from from
Speaker 3: taking action on something. And I think some of this
Speaker 3: is is around like the the need to to feel
Speaker 3: validated by those around you, the need to check in
Speaker 3: on ideas or actions. And I think like in the
Speaker 3: context of this article, the idea here is like you
Speaker 3: got to just go do the thing, like trust your instinct,
Speaker 3: trust your intuition, go do the thing. Because if you
Speaker 3: truly believe that, like life is lessons, then you're going
Speaker 3: to make a decision in a call and it's gonna
Speaker 3: be the right decision call and you'll kind of keep
Speaker 3: it moving.
Speaker 1: Or you're going to make a decision or call.
Speaker 3: Where there either is not the right thing or could
Speaker 3: have been done differently or better, but you don't know
Speaker 3: that until you go and make that call. If you
Speaker 3: get caught up in not taking action or waiting for
Speaker 3: others to give you that permission or that that that validation,
Speaker 3: then you're going to build that into the way in
Speaker 3: which you make decisions. Which is going to slow you
Speaker 3: down into the future.
Speaker 1: I think that's part of it for sure.
Speaker 2: I'm trying to think about the times when I didn't
Speaker 2: move forward with a decision when in hindsight I should have.
Speaker 2: Like in hindsight, I can look back and think I
Speaker 2: knew how to do that, I didn't have to wait
Speaker 2: for someone else to jump in or help me. I
Speaker 2: think part of it can be, you know, wanting to
Speaker 2: you know, not not take on the potent consequences or
Speaker 2: you know, take on the burden of the consequences.
Speaker 1: Of if I get it wrong.
Speaker 2: So it's it's a matter of you know, like if
Speaker 2: someone else kind of makes the decision for me and
Speaker 2: then it goes wrong, I can blame them. But if
Speaker 2: I make the decision it goes wrong, that I have
Speaker 2: no one to blame about myself. And we're not talking
Speaker 2: you know, life changing decisions here, just not wanting to
Speaker 2: look at myself in the mirror and say, yeah, I
Speaker 2: got that one wrong.
Speaker 1: You know.
Speaker 2: And I think I think in a lot of situations
Speaker 2: when that's happened to me and I've successfully been able
Speaker 2: to kind of you know, pawn off the decision making
Speaker 2: process onto somebody else. And then they make the decision
Speaker 2: and then we move forward with what.
Speaker 1: They want to do.
Speaker 2: In my mind, usually it ends with me thinking, well, crap,
Speaker 2: that's exactly what I would.
Speaker 1: Have done anyway.
Speaker 2: And and now I've I've gotten rid of the risk
Speaker 2: of making the wrong decision, but I've also gotten rid
Speaker 2: of the reward of making the right decision on my own,
Speaker 2: you know. And so you know, if you if you,
Speaker 2: if you're not wanting to take on the risk of
Speaker 2: making the decision from the wrong perspective, you'll also lose
Speaker 2: the ability to get the I don't want to say
Speaker 2: the credit, but you know, kind of the feather in
Speaker 2: the cap of of going through something and coming out
Speaker 2: the other side having made the right decision, and then
Speaker 2: your peers and your colleagues and your coworkers can kind
Speaker 2: of watch how you act.
Speaker 1: In the moment and and get something done when there's
Speaker 1: you know, a level of ambiguity.
Speaker 2: And if you have brought somebody else into the process
Speaker 2: to kind of de risk it for yourself, then you know,
Speaker 2: you you kind of you eliminate all ability to have
Speaker 2: those moments happen, and it's not worth it in the
Speaker 2: long term, you know, Like if you can get caught
Speaker 2: up in it every once in a while, and that's okay,
Speaker 2: But if it becomes your mo you're you're not gonna
Speaker 2: do well by yourself when it comes to, you know,
Speaker 2: moving up in your career.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and not even the credit of the dission.
Speaker 3: But I think what I heard what you're talking about
Speaker 3: is the confidence that you have gained in the answers right, accolades, just.
Speaker 2: You know, the because because it's it's a cycle, you know,
Speaker 2: you do it, you do it right, and then you go, oh,
Speaker 2: I can do that, and you have more confidence to
Speaker 2: do it again the next time.
Speaker 1: If you never start, you never get that exactly.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And I think that that to me is where
Speaker 3: where I've seen you know, tremendous kind of growth and
Speaker 3: capability with leaders is like when when when they have
Speaker 3: to make that decision when you're when you're a part
Speaker 3: of the dialogue as a leader, especially when you're leading leaders,
Speaker 3: but to say, like, well, what what do you think here?
Speaker 1: Like what do you what are you considering? What might be?
Speaker 3: You know, you you ask these curious questions, what might
Speaker 3: be the impact of that decision? What would be the
Speaker 3: positive things that would happen? What what would be the
Speaker 3: negative things that would happen with that? You know, who
Speaker 3: have you talked to about this? And you're asking these
Speaker 3: curious questions, And again it's not to be like you're
Speaker 3: not trying to catch anyone. You're not trying to get
Speaker 3: like a gotcha moment. You are simply asking questions to
Speaker 3: number one, under stand like their thought processes and make
Speaker 3: a decision, but also finding those points where they've made
Speaker 3: the right call, they've done that thing, and you can
Speaker 3: give them that recognition in the moment and say that
Speaker 3: like you know, hey, like okay, so it sounds like
Speaker 3: you've really put a lot of thought into this, and
Speaker 3: I appreciate that you've thought about a lot of different
Speaker 3: angles here, you know, the positives and the negative. So
Speaker 3: like what is the call like end of the day,
Speaker 3: Like if you had to make a call right now,
Speaker 3: what would that call be? And they say, well, this
Speaker 3: is what I would do in that And you say,
Speaker 3: like that's great. I agree, you've nailed that one perfectly,
Speaker 3: Like go go do that thing and guess what we
Speaker 3: might learn something here. It might not be the most
Speaker 3: perfect call. There might be some things that you've already
Speaker 3: talked about that could be a negative impact to this,
Speaker 3: but like we're prepared for it, we've thought about it,
Speaker 3: we've considered it, but like you're absolutely making the right call,
Speaker 3: Like you know, take that step, you know what I'm saying,
Speaker 3: And like, the next time we come across something like this,
Speaker 3: what I want you to do is come to me
Speaker 3: and let me know what decision you made and then
Speaker 3: what was the learning you got out of that, whether
Speaker 3: it was you know, validation and recognition for right making
Speaker 3: it right call, or did you make a call and
Speaker 3: then hey, there's something that you had to learn here,
Speaker 3: like like you know, bring that to me next time.
Speaker 3: So it's kind of like this space of doing that
Speaker 3: I think for leaders is really important and for this
Speaker 3: to be a topic in this context of things to
Speaker 3: like you know, talking to your younger self. What it
Speaker 3: tells me is that there's not enough leaders in that
Speaker 3: space thinking about how they're building that level of confidence
Speaker 3: to then say to then somebody to say, like, I've
Speaker 3: got enough confidence now that I know that I can
Speaker 3: make these decisions, I can push harder, I can I
Speaker 3: can you know I can. I can trust my instincts
Speaker 3: and intuition to go do this and if it's not
Speaker 3: how I want it to land. I'm gonna at least
Speaker 3: learn something from it, but it's not going to be
Speaker 3: like endgame.
Speaker 1: Right right.
Speaker 2: So it's funny you mentioned it in that context because
Speaker 2: the verbage in the article says, you are born with
Speaker 2: good natural instincts, but society and many workplaces tell you
Speaker 2: not to trust yourself, and they're not wrong. Like the
Speaker 2: it goes back to childhood and that the times when
Speaker 2: when you know, you stop your kids from doing something
Speaker 2: dangerous because you don't want them to get hurt, and
Speaker 2: and it's a it's a tough kind of balance because
Speaker 2: you know, if you if you stop them from running
Speaker 2: out in the middle of the street, that's probably a
Speaker 2: good thing because the getting.
Speaker 1: Hurt part would be pretty catastrophic.
Speaker 2: But if you stop them from you know, walking along
Speaker 2: you know, a thin little wall where if they fall,
Speaker 2: you know, fall off it's a you know, a foot
Speaker 2: or two feet to the ground, then maybe that's a
Speaker 2: bad instinct to go and try to stop that from happening,
Speaker 2: because the worst case scenario is that they fall and
Speaker 2: then they injure themselves, you know, you know, not in
Speaker 2: a major way, and then they get through it and
Speaker 2: you dust off and you put a band aid on
Speaker 2: you and you move forward. And you know, from from
Speaker 2: the very beginning, we do things.
Speaker 1: Like this to people.
Speaker 2: We we we tell them not to trust themselves, don't
Speaker 2: don't walk along that wall, you'll fall off.
Speaker 1: And it's like, well, what if they wouldn't fall off? You
Speaker 1: know what? What if instead everything was.
Speaker 2: About what what could you do to make sure that
Speaker 2: you you you lifted the level of trust and and
Speaker 2: and self confidence in things that a person was going
Speaker 2: to do. If every interaction was one in the spirit
Speaker 2: of lifting that self confidence all the way from childhood
Speaker 2: up through school and into the workplace. If you're the
Speaker 2: first day of your first job, your your boss has
Speaker 2: said to you, yeah, trust trust yourself. I trust you.
Speaker 2: You should trust yourself. You were hired for a reason.
Speaker 2: Get it done and if it and if it goes wrong,
Speaker 2: we'll talk about it together.
Speaker 1: But it's not gonna be into the world. We'll get
Speaker 1: we'll get through it together.
Speaker 2: You know if if if you think about if leaders
Speaker 2: across the board, whether it be parents or coaches or
Speaker 2: teachers or bosses, operated in that way, it like the
Speaker 2: human race would be unstoppable, right like it would just
Speaker 2: be the the amount that would get done by people
Speaker 2: who have those amazing instincts.
Speaker 1: I think, uh, I think people would surprise themselves.
Speaker 2: Because a lot of these things are not you know,
Speaker 2: you're not trusting yourself because you know, you haven't gone
Speaker 2: to school for twenty years and studied something. It's not
Speaker 2: trusting instincts from a more basic level of I just
Speaker 2: kind of have the life experience and the common sense
Speaker 2: to get something done, you know, not necessarily the formality
Speaker 2: of education around something. Sometimes those are the things that
Speaker 2: matter most that they're getting done, those things that you
Speaker 2: didn't have to study for, go to school for for
Speaker 2: a long time, but just something that you accumulated through
Speaker 2: life experience making those decisions correctly. It's not something that
Speaker 2: gets validated unless you actually go through it and do
Speaker 2: it and come on the other side.
Speaker 3: Now, let me ask you, like, is there a time
Speaker 3: you can think of in your career where a leader
Speaker 3: did that for you, where a leader helped you to
Speaker 3: gain some confidence in a decision that you wanted to
Speaker 3: make or needed to make, but maybe you were unsure
Speaker 3: of or you know, maybe you went to them for
Speaker 3: validation or permission and you know, you walked away with
Speaker 3: confidence and clarity on what you needed to go do.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Of course.
Speaker 2: The the first job that I had doing where I
Speaker 2: was in charge of of of hiring people, of screening
Speaker 2: interviews and hiring people, and the my boss at the
Speaker 2: time noticed that the the people that I was sending
Speaker 2: up like to the next level were all good people
Speaker 2: and that there were no no people were being sent
Speaker 2: through that that they would have to you know, come
Speaker 2: to me later and say, hey, uh, why did that
Speaker 2: person get through? Right, Like it was never any of
Speaker 2: that for you know, a period of not a long time,
Speaker 2: like it was only I'd only been the job a
Speaker 2: couple of weeks. And then when I started, you know,
Speaker 2: putting people through from like a request standpoint, eventually my
Speaker 2: boss came to me and said.
Speaker 1: You don't need to you know, screen through me anymore.
Speaker 1: Just put them through like.
Speaker 2: If you if if you like it, I trust it,
Speaker 2: you know, go go put it through. And and that
Speaker 2: was a it was a moment where I thought, no, no,
Speaker 2: I don't want to do that yet, Like I didn't
Speaker 2: say that, but in my mind, I was thinking, no,
Speaker 2: I don't want to do that, Like there's a reason
Speaker 2: why you were here to kind of make that final
Speaker 2: call before a person gets gets put through. And it
Speaker 2: was it was his way of saying at the time, Yeah,
Speaker 2: I know, it's my final call, but I've noticed a
Speaker 2: track record over the period of a few weeks or
Speaker 2: a month here, and and it's a good, good enough
Speaker 2: track record where I don't I don't feel like I
Speaker 2: need to do this anymore.
Speaker 1: I feel like you can kind of take this on.
Speaker 2: And you know, the first maybe a dozen or so
Speaker 2: people that I put through without that kind of approval process,
Speaker 2: I was very worried the whole time. I was worried
Speaker 2: that that would be the first time that I did
Speaker 2: something wrong, that the first person I put through where
Speaker 2: I didn't do a good job of screening, and and
Speaker 2: that never happened. And you know, the the first time
Speaker 2: that you know, I was ever even talked to it
Speaker 2: all about a person that got through that shouldn't have
Speaker 2: gotten through. It was actually a moment where in my
Speaker 2: I was thinking, I don't know if that person should
Speaker 2: get through, and I kind of gave him the benefit
Speaker 2: of the doubt. And and that was another one of
Speaker 2: those moments where in hindsight, I should have trusted my
Speaker 2: my natural instinct was to say, no, don't put this
Speaker 2: person through. But I gave them the benefit of the doubt,
Speaker 2: and I should have trusted myself. I should have said no,
Speaker 2: maybe not on this person. So you know, my my
Speaker 2: boss had the the you know, kind of the forethought
Speaker 2: to put me in charge of the situation, and you know,
Speaker 2: my my you know, kind of batting record on.
Speaker 1: It was was almost perfect. But but yeah, it helped.
Speaker 2: To know that I had his confidence in making those
Speaker 2: decisions because after a long enough time, if I had
Speaker 2: been putting through people that I were I was one
Speaker 2: hundred percent sure were great, and I did get that confidence,
Speaker 2: but I never got that reciprocation from him to say, yeah,
Speaker 2: go ahead and take it on yourself. If every single
Speaker 2: person he was still wanting to screen also, then I
Speaker 2: would have eventually kind of lost, you know, kind of
Speaker 2: lost pass around the job to begin with, because I'm thinking,
Speaker 2: why am I even here if this person's gonna approve
Speaker 2: everything else too, And so it's kind of this fine
Speaker 2: line between you know, you have to give people the
Speaker 2: confidence by putting them in situations where they could possibly fail,
Speaker 2: and sometimes force them to do it, because if you
Speaker 2: wait too long, then they were ready a long time ago,
Speaker 2: and then you maybe have lost the relationship as an employee. Yep.
Speaker 3: I love that example. And with that it brings us
Speaker 3: to this episodes one minute hack. But first a few
Speaker 3: words from our sponsors.
Speaker 2: All Right, this episode's one minute hack is about you
Speaker 2: as a leader and whether or not you validate your
Speaker 2: people's instincts to make decisions on their own, or if
Speaker 2: you are validating your people's instincts to come to you
Speaker 2: for help as a decision maker. To be a good leader,
Speaker 2: you need to empower your people to be able to
Speaker 2: make decisions that don't require your involvement, because if your
Speaker 2: involvement is required, you are not growing and grooming them
Speaker 2: into being or leaders themselves.
Speaker 1: You are just kind of.
Speaker 2: Growing them into being, you know, compliant employees who will
Speaker 2: always need you as a leader. And if that's the
Speaker 2: way you go about it, you have to really think about,
Speaker 2: you know, who are you in this for and and
Speaker 2: what's the ultimate goal here? Is it to you know,
Speaker 2: to make yourself indispensable, which means you can't move up,
Speaker 2: or is it to grow people underneath you to become
Speaker 2: better enough at their job where they.
Speaker 1: Can take over your role? And help you move up
Speaker 1: in your career too.
Speaker 2: And so if you if your people are coming to you,
Speaker 2: think about things like, are you are you validating their
Speaker 2: decision to come to you by coming up with some
Speaker 2: you know, piece of wisdom or coaching or schooling that
Speaker 2: you can impart upon them that that kind of makes
Speaker 2: them think, oh, this is this was a good decision
Speaker 2: to come to Chris. I need to come to Chris
Speaker 2: more often? Or are you asking you know, curious and
Speaker 2: empowering questions like what would they do in that situation?
Speaker 2: What what do they want to do? What are the
Speaker 2: what are their genuine thoughts about it? And getting them
Speaker 2: to think outside the box about how they would move forward,
Speaker 2: and then when they tell you what they would do,
Speaker 2: saying that's exactly what I would do, like I love it,
Speaker 2: go forward and move forward with it and building that
Speaker 2: confidence because eventually, if you do that enough times, they'll
Speaker 2: stop having to come to you. They'll just people to
Speaker 2: make the decision without needing you. And you've done your
Speaker 2: job as a leader to kind of grow that within
Speaker 2: a person because it's natural for them to want to
Speaker 2: come to you at first when they're trying to figure
Speaker 2: out what their relationship is. But oftentimes when your people
Speaker 2: come to you, they're not coming to you because they
Speaker 2: want your advice on what to do. They're coming to
Speaker 2: you because they're testing the waters of what kind of
Speaker 2: a leader you will be and whether or not it
Speaker 2: is going to be okay to make decisions on their
Speaker 2: own or if you want them coming to you and
Speaker 2: if your actions validate their decision to come to you,
Speaker 2: all you're doing is teaching them, Okay, all right, this
Speaker 2: is the kind of leader who I'm not going to
Speaker 2: be able to make decisions on my own because they're
Speaker 2: trying to validate themselves and they need to be involved.
Speaker 1: And it is what it is. But those are the
Speaker 1: people who move on from your organization if they're talented.
Speaker 3: Yeah, no, I think it's it's a great woman to hack.
Speaker 3: And again it's it's just kind of the idea around
Speaker 3: these these interactions, these opportunities when it comes to those
Speaker 3: that you lead and when they come to you, because
Speaker 3: that's going to happen, Like there are definitely there are
Speaker 3: things that you, as a leader you have to make
Speaker 3: the decision on, Like those things absolutely are going to happen.
Speaker 3: It's in those other things where they your team can
Speaker 3: absolutely be the ones who make a decision on something
Speaker 3: that if they continue to come to you for that,
Speaker 3: either validation or permission, it really slows a lot of
Speaker 3: things down. And that should be kind of a you know,
Speaker 3: a little bit of your own personal red flag about
Speaker 3: how much of my day am I making decisions that
Speaker 3: I don't need to make that can be made without
Speaker 3: me being involved? And if you're seeing a lot of that,
Speaker 3: which may happen sometimes with new teams or new employees
Speaker 3: or somebody in a new role, being really con of
Speaker 3: not only what you're doing in the moment to help
Speaker 3: them build confidence, but also telling them upfront, Hey, I
Speaker 3: want to talk to a little bit about confidence and
Speaker 3: capability here, and what I want to make sure that
Speaker 3: you understand is that, like you know, to be in
Speaker 3: this role to do this work, there's a lot of
Speaker 3: trust that I have in you to get this job done.
Speaker 3: And I believe and through our conversations that you're making
Speaker 3: a lot of the right decisions here.
Speaker 1: But you continue to come to me for that. So
Speaker 1: let's talk about that, you know what I mean.
Speaker 3: Let's talk about how we can how we can make
Speaker 3: sure that you feel great about the support that you
Speaker 3: might need or feel that you need, but also feel
Speaker 3: better about making these decisions on your own and feeling
Speaker 3: good about knowing that sometimes there might be a learning
Speaker 3: lesson here, you know. So like those are things I
Speaker 3: think that leaders have to be a lot more intentional with.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think you're right, I think kind of the
Speaker 2: last thing I want to say about this, I think
Speaker 2: is important is that you know, oftentimes you know the
Speaker 2: people who are coming to you to ask and asking
Speaker 2: for help. You know they again, it'll start out with
Speaker 2: them testing to see if they're allowed to. But if
Speaker 2: you're doing the right things and telling them this is
Speaker 2: what you expect out of them, and they're still not
Speaker 2: doing it, then you might have to dig in a
Speaker 2: little bit and find out why. You know, is it
Speaker 2: possible they had a boss in the past who chastised
Speaker 2: them when that boss was not involved, and that's what
Speaker 2: they're kind of their their instinct is is to make
Speaker 2: sure they're taking a partner to de risk the situation
Speaker 2: and get validation before they move forward. But again, you know,
Speaker 2: just because it might take a little extra work to
Speaker 2: kind of coax a person out of that shell, it's
Speaker 2: the right thing to do. And it might take some
Speaker 2: examples of it happening over and over again. But the
Speaker 2: major progress that gets made is not in validating of
Speaker 2: the good decisions. It's in how that employee sees you
Speaker 2: help them get through a wrong decision, and so you
Speaker 2: can validate all you want to and make sure that
Speaker 2: they are you know, they understand that, yeah, that was
Speaker 2: a great decision. Good for you, that's exactly what I
Speaker 2: would have done. You know, more power to you. Keep
Speaker 2: making those decisions. That's all great and that's important. But
Speaker 2: the first time the employee does not make the right
Speaker 2: decision and you have to coach them on it, that
Speaker 2: is going to be the moment where you truly validate
Speaker 2: their decision to come to you or not come to
Speaker 2: you on things. Because if you've told them over and
Speaker 2: over again, don't come to me, I trust you, And
Speaker 2: the first time they make the wrong decision, you chastise
Speaker 2: them for making the wrong decision.
Speaker 1: That will never happen again.
Speaker 2: They will always come to you forever, and so it's
Speaker 2: about how do you help them get through it in
Speaker 2: a in a way that shows you have compassion, that
Speaker 2: that lets them know there was a better way to
Speaker 2: do it. But without making them feel like they shouldn't
Speaker 2: have made the decision on their own, like it's it's
Speaker 2: it's things like I can totally see why you made
Speaker 2: this decision. These are these are the things I liked
Speaker 2: about it. These are the things that you should think
Speaker 2: about in the future going forward in order to help
Speaker 2: you know, inform that a little bit better.
Speaker 1: And and and I got you, and let's let's move
Speaker 1: on now.
Speaker 2: And the the more that you can kind of force
Speaker 2: yourself into that box of making sure that the important
Speaker 2: thing is not about you know, coaching them up on
Speaker 2: what they did wrong, but about using it as an
Speaker 2: exercise to validate the trust that they have.
Speaker 1: In you to continue making decisions on their own.
Speaker 2: That's where those moments matter and where you really kind
Speaker 2: of define the relationship between you and the.
Speaker 3: Employee absolutely, and with that it brings us to the
Speaker 3: end of this episode. This is hacking your leadership. I'm
Speaker 3: Lorenzo and I'm Chris, and we'll talk to you all
Speaker 3: next time.