WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.840 --> 00:00:05.280 Welcome back everybody to the Cult of Cryptids, the Strange 2 00:00:05.320 --> 00:00:09.919 Root podcast and called the Conspiracy Collaboration. Now we're gonna 3 00:00:09.919 --> 00:00:12.039 throw it back to a fun one, one of the 4 00:00:12.119 --> 00:00:17.800 second specials ever that we filmed about Christmas creatures and monsters. 5 00:00:18.239 --> 00:00:21.480 So make sure to pour yourself a tall blass of 6 00:00:21.640 --> 00:00:25.079 eggnog and get ready for a laugh, because this special 7 00:00:25.600 --> 00:00:27.960 is quite hilarious. We had a lot of fun doing 8 00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:30.920 it and we hope you enjoy it also, So make 9 00:00:30.960 --> 00:00:33.840 sure to go subscribe to Strange Roup podcast wherever you 10 00:00:33.920 --> 00:00:37.280 find podcasts. We're also on Rumble and YouTube and x 11 00:00:37.719 --> 00:00:40.679 everywhere that you can find a podcast, you can find us. 12 00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:45.679 So Marry Christmas, everybody, and prepare because it's about to 13 00:00:45.759 --> 00:00:53.600 get strange. 14 00:00:57.520 --> 00:01:01.560 Jeffrey Dahmers, So the Blood You and the Bomber blowing 15 00:01:01.679 --> 00:01:05.439 up Waco, Texas and Heaven's Gates and Helius Modify. 16 00:01:05.120 --> 00:01:07.079 And then from Apes Hitler fixed. 17 00:01:06.840 --> 00:01:10.120 His death and then escaped, Big Butt and the moth Man, 18 00:01:10.480 --> 00:01:14.480 Son of Sam Talking to Talks Again, Witches Go, Saint 19 00:01:14.560 --> 00:01:18.439 Complin's Mysterious Noise and Hot Dings, Dark Guards and the 20 00:01:18.480 --> 00:01:19.239 scullt Bones. 21 00:01:19.480 --> 00:01:22.599 Most Clemti is a probably loan so when you're feeling. 22 00:01:22.280 --> 00:01:25.359 All alone, grabbing beer and get stone a welcome you 23 00:01:25.560 --> 00:01:27.159 to the podcast trained crew. 24 00:01:27.519 --> 00:01:30.920 We are here to entertain you. 25 00:01:30.920 --> 00:01:31.000 You. 26 00:01:31.640 --> 00:01:56.040 It's about three How much do you think Santa paid 27 00:01:56.079 --> 00:01:56.959 for a sleigh? 28 00:01:57.040 --> 00:01:57.840 I don't know how much. 29 00:01:57.959 --> 00:01:59.000 Nothing it was on the house. 30 00:02:01.560 --> 00:02:04.519 Okay, they're all dumb, but that was dumb, dumb. Welcome 31 00:02:04.640 --> 00:02:06.799 to the Strange Brew Christmas Special. 32 00:02:06.840 --> 00:02:10.400 And we're all fustive. And I got jingle and jingle. 33 00:02:10.319 --> 00:02:14.520 Balls, got jingle my balls and uh so we're we're 34 00:02:14.520 --> 00:02:17.800 at Yeah, we're attempting to film this right now. So 35 00:02:17.840 --> 00:02:20.159 this should be up on YouTube on the Strange Brew page. 36 00:02:20.560 --> 00:02:22.800 Uh but we'll see what happens in post edit. 37 00:02:23.520 --> 00:02:27.639 But we fucking sucks. It's a damn good chance. But 38 00:02:27.680 --> 00:02:31.280 we'll see what happens for the that's a lovely attitude 39 00:02:31.280 --> 00:02:33.599 you got there, all right. 40 00:02:33.719 --> 00:02:36.680 So I'm Tom Kat, your fucking host, and this is 41 00:02:36.680 --> 00:02:38.639 my other host, Bilbo Baggins. 42 00:02:41.000 --> 00:02:42.120 You gotta get back onto that. 43 00:02:43.000 --> 00:02:44.719 Just just write it like a list of one hundred 44 00:02:44.800 --> 00:02:46.400 names and every time to scratch it off. 45 00:02:46.439 --> 00:02:48.960 So I got I got eggnogging rum. I have some 46 00:02:49.039 --> 00:02:52.159 fucking whiskey. We have beer upstairs, we have a lot 47 00:02:52.159 --> 00:02:52.840 of drinking. 48 00:02:52.680 --> 00:02:53.319 Beer right now. 49 00:02:53.439 --> 00:02:55.840 But we're gonna, we're gonna work our way to ignog. 50 00:02:55.960 --> 00:02:59.400 I'm it's Christmas one, it's Christmas time, so you have 51 00:02:59.479 --> 00:03:04.080 to one. But I'm like severely lactose. So Billy stinks 52 00:03:04.120 --> 00:03:06.159 like am but it doesn't bother me any Like, it 53 00:03:06.159 --> 00:03:07.039 doesn't hurt my stomach. 54 00:03:07.080 --> 00:03:09.400 I don't really shit. I just fart and it's. 55 00:03:09.599 --> 00:03:12.039 Terrible, but like I love it, Like it's actually kind 56 00:03:12.039 --> 00:03:14.919 of funny to me. Yeah, we're gonna see how it does. Yeah, 57 00:03:14.919 --> 00:03:17.240 nobody else seems to enjoy it as much as I do. 58 00:03:17.759 --> 00:03:20.680 All right, so let's just get into it. Then, Christmas 59 00:03:20.800 --> 00:03:23.360 isn't all about jingle bells and jolly old Saint Nick. 60 00:03:23.479 --> 00:03:23.919 Yes it is. 61 00:03:24.000 --> 00:03:28.159 There are darker and figures looking about, and they don't 62 00:03:28.199 --> 00:03:32.000 always come from the North Pole. This week strange topic 63 00:03:32.039 --> 00:03:35.960 for the holiday season is Christmas creatures, monsters, and folklore. 64 00:03:37.520 --> 00:03:40.680 But but it's also kind of about the jingle bells 65 00:03:40.719 --> 00:03:43.280 and the Yeah. Yeah, well we'll get into it. 66 00:03:43.319 --> 00:03:45.639 But I just want to add this one because I 67 00:03:45.759 --> 00:03:47.800 mentioned it before, I think on last year's episode. But 68 00:03:47.879 --> 00:03:51.840 let's have a little sip of the egg nod way more. 69 00:03:51.960 --> 00:03:52.960 Ye, have anything you can. 70 00:03:54.520 --> 00:03:56.520 It's gonna be rough, like seven years down the road, 71 00:03:56.560 --> 00:03:58.840 trying to like come up with a new Christmas. 72 00:03:58.360 --> 00:04:01.159 Episode every time. Well, I I just someone pleased, like 73 00:04:01.199 --> 00:04:03.680 do like a mass killing or something on Christmas? So 74 00:04:03.680 --> 00:04:06.240 we have on top. We could always next days. 75 00:04:06.000 --> 00:04:10.039 Talk about Jesus for Christmas. You want the non existent 76 00:04:10.120 --> 00:04:10.680 profit or. 77 00:04:10.719 --> 00:04:12.800 Fucking Oh that that's a good topic. 78 00:04:13.199 --> 00:04:15.360 But so I want to add this one because I 79 00:04:15.360 --> 00:04:18.839 think it's fucked. But paintings often depict Saint Nicholas with 80 00:04:18.959 --> 00:04:23.240 three young boys standing inside of a barrel. But why Okay. 81 00:04:23.839 --> 00:04:27.360 According to the legends, three boys were playing in a 82 00:04:27.399 --> 00:04:30.759 field during harvest time. However, they wandered into the city 83 00:04:30.800 --> 00:04:33.519 and got lost, unable to make it home, and then 84 00:04:33.560 --> 00:04:36.360 they stopped at the butcher shop asking for food in 85 00:04:36.399 --> 00:04:37.279 a place to sleep. 86 00:04:37.560 --> 00:04:39.600 The butcher then murdered the three. 87 00:04:39.439 --> 00:04:46.920 Boys and put their bodies and a fucking put their 88 00:04:46.920 --> 00:04:51.000 dead bodies in a pickle barrel, pickling dead children. So 89 00:04:51.560 --> 00:04:54.160 and he was gonna, I guess, sell their meat on 90 00:04:54.199 --> 00:04:57.000 the market, because that happened back then. No, no, but 91 00:04:57.040 --> 00:05:01.879 then seven years later Saint Nicholas felt his soul felt 92 00:05:01.879 --> 00:05:02.720 the souls of the. 93 00:05:02.639 --> 00:05:06.319 Boys that took a long time there saying yeah. 94 00:05:06.120 --> 00:05:09.279 And knocked on the butcher's door and said open your 95 00:05:09.360 --> 00:05:14.759 pickle barrels, and then he said, rise up, children. Some 96 00:05:14.800 --> 00:05:17.959 accounts say he made the sign of the cross as 97 00:05:18.000 --> 00:05:21.959 he miraculously resurrected the boys. According to the French legend, 98 00:05:21.959 --> 00:05:26.079 the butcher then became Saint Nicholas's servant. Whoever, because it's legend, 99 00:05:26.160 --> 00:05:28.319 this is a legend, not actually historical fact. 100 00:05:28.600 --> 00:05:32.079 Versions may differ, not fucking historical. 101 00:05:32.240 --> 00:05:33.839 I never knew this, and like I knew about like 102 00:05:33.920 --> 00:05:39.199 him resurrecting bodies dead children, I knew about that, but 103 00:05:39.319 --> 00:05:40.959 I never knew the pickle barrel thing. And I guess 104 00:05:41.000 --> 00:05:43.439 people like hide a pickle in the Christmas tree because 105 00:05:43.439 --> 00:05:44.120 of this tradition. 106 00:05:44.319 --> 00:05:49.120 No way was that why people hide pickles. 107 00:05:47.639 --> 00:05:50.439 Because children got murdered. Then we'll see you. No, people 108 00:05:50.519 --> 00:05:52.399 hide other things in their Christmas tree too. What is it? 109 00:05:52.399 --> 00:05:53.600 It's not a pickle, their. 110 00:05:53.439 --> 00:05:55.079 Dick and that you got to find the guy standing 111 00:05:55.079 --> 00:05:56.519 with his dickeat. I don't know. 112 00:05:56.439 --> 00:05:57.959 How small of a person do you have? 113 00:05:59.120 --> 00:06:01.879 The whole sticks of the whole tree. And then someone's like, 114 00:06:01.920 --> 00:06:04.079 what is that? 115 00:06:04.079 --> 00:06:06.839 That's stupid that's to not see the body at all. 116 00:06:06.879 --> 00:06:08.319 He's like, I'm just gonna put this right. 117 00:06:09.000 --> 00:06:10.759 No, it's a billy, because then you can just hide 118 00:06:10.759 --> 00:06:12.439 behind the tree. No one can see the tree. All 119 00:06:12.439 --> 00:06:15.319 they see is the dick sticks, all right, So let's 120 00:06:15.319 --> 00:06:16.920 get in the next one. This one's kind of fucked up. 121 00:06:17.160 --> 00:06:21.160 Bell's nickel bells roughly translate as fur in German, and 122 00:06:21.279 --> 00:06:26.000 nickel refers to jolly old Saint Nicholas. So Bell's nickel 123 00:06:26.279 --> 00:06:30.319 is Saint Nicholas in fur or pelts. And this version 124 00:06:30.399 --> 00:06:35.800 from German folklore does indeed doil out the occasional gift 125 00:06:36.439 --> 00:06:40.319 like Santa Claus wood. He even carries a sackful of semen. 126 00:06:40.439 --> 00:06:44.920 I'm just joking, even carries a sack the story, he 127 00:06:44.959 --> 00:06:47.680 also carries a sack full of candy and nuts for 128 00:06:47.759 --> 00:06:52.639 good little children. That, however, is where Yeah, this is 129 00:06:52.680 --> 00:06:56.160 where the similarities end. Instead of a nice coat, Bell's 130 00:06:56.240 --> 00:07:00.759 nick's furs are grimy or sometimes just outright fucking dirty. 131 00:07:00.959 --> 00:07:04.360 Well that's that's a big thing too, right, Because Santa 132 00:07:04.360 --> 00:07:07.319 Claus didn't didn't down chimneys. No, but Santa Claus didn't 133 00:07:07.319 --> 00:07:09.720 look like Santa Claus until like, fuck, I want to say, 134 00:07:09.759 --> 00:07:12.480 like the late thirties, early forties, it was. 135 00:07:13.240 --> 00:07:15.360 Yeah, you actually know who did that? Fuck, I'm surprised 136 00:07:15.399 --> 00:07:15.959 I remember that. 137 00:07:16.199 --> 00:07:18.560 You know who made Santa Claus like stop looking creepy 138 00:07:18.600 --> 00:07:19.959 and look like jolly and helpful? 139 00:07:20.079 --> 00:07:20.800 Was Coca Cola? 140 00:07:21.240 --> 00:07:23.240 Oh I knew they hired like an artist to be like, 141 00:07:23.279 --> 00:07:26.160 you need to promote this better because he looks fucking 142 00:07:26.199 --> 00:07:27.279 scared on our bill. 143 00:07:27.480 --> 00:07:30.160 Wasn't Santa Wasn't that assche with Christmas? 144 00:07:30.199 --> 00:07:32.120 Well? No, act well he was, but he was. He 145 00:07:32.240 --> 00:07:35.079 was terrifying looking like it was, here's Santa Claus and 146 00:07:35.079 --> 00:07:36.680 it's like, wow, I do not want him to come 147 00:07:36.720 --> 00:07:40.120 into my home. Please stay homeless, you fucking psychopath. Yeah. 148 00:07:40.160 --> 00:07:42.120 And then you know a good old crampis beating the 149 00:07:42.120 --> 00:07:44.160 bad children, which you know this is kind of the 150 00:07:44.199 --> 00:07:45.879 same thing, so like this is kind of where the 151 00:07:45.920 --> 00:07:49.800 similarities end with him. You know, his code's dirty. And 152 00:07:49.839 --> 00:07:52.879 then while Saint Nicholas will just leave lump of cool 153 00:07:52.920 --> 00:07:56.800 for nine children, Bell's nick much like cramp, Bell's nickel, 154 00:07:56.959 --> 00:08:00.000 much like Crampis will whip the boys on their children 155 00:08:00.079 --> 00:08:01.600 on their backs with a switch. 156 00:08:01.839 --> 00:08:05.000 I like that version of Cramps. You're a bad fucking kid, like, 157 00:08:05.279 --> 00:08:05.639 come here. 158 00:08:06.560 --> 00:08:09.079 So a switch is a flexible rod typically used for 159 00:08:09.079 --> 00:08:10.560 corporate punishment. I had to look that up because I 160 00:08:10.600 --> 00:08:12.319 was like, what is the fucking who? What are you 161 00:08:12.319 --> 00:08:14.759 whipping with a switch? Is this like a dominatrix thing? 162 00:08:14.879 --> 00:08:18.199 Like so, like I thought a switch was just like 163 00:08:18.240 --> 00:08:23.240 a cop. Uh no, that's a fucking baton. 164 00:08:25.600 --> 00:08:26.360 There isn't a switch. 165 00:08:26.399 --> 00:08:28.079 A knife that's a switch blade. 166 00:08:28.120 --> 00:08:29.879 Yeah, I know. But you you're like, I'm gonna get 167 00:08:29.879 --> 00:08:31.759 them with my switch. 168 00:08:31.519 --> 00:08:34.120 Maybe, all right, Uh, let's go to the next one. 169 00:08:34.440 --> 00:08:40.639 Uh pre uh preach peach or tra petrata petrata, that's 170 00:08:40.679 --> 00:08:43.440 what I'm gonna call them. Oh, petretah is a dual 171 00:08:43.519 --> 00:08:49.720 gender gendered spirit, dual gender gender that's that's progressive, that's progressive. 172 00:08:49.799 --> 00:08:50.519 What year is this? 173 00:08:50.840 --> 00:08:54.879 I fucking no, ancient fucking bullshit like like this like 174 00:08:54.919 --> 00:08:57.919 this thirteen to like seventeen hundreds. 175 00:08:57.759 --> 00:08:59.919 It's just like any time this story came out of 176 00:09:00.240 --> 00:09:05.279 are like no, no, no, no, that's not real. 177 00:09:05.480 --> 00:09:06.440 The spirit may. 178 00:09:06.519 --> 00:09:11.919 Either appear as a beautiful woman or a haggard haggard. 179 00:09:11.559 --> 00:09:17.840 Corn corn corn, a haggard. 180 00:09:17.519 --> 00:09:24.039 Crone, like a cruel Karen. Why couldn't you just oh gendered, Well, 181 00:09:24.600 --> 00:09:26.919 it might turn to a man too. I was gonna say, 182 00:09:26.919 --> 00:09:29.000 why does the guy have to be likely looking? But 183 00:09:29.120 --> 00:09:32.679 you said, no, it's it's yeah, it's it's a beautiful woman. 184 00:09:32.799 --> 00:09:35.440 Or I think it contains to a man or a 185 00:09:35.480 --> 00:09:39.360 haggard crone, which is a fucking ugly old woman that 186 00:09:39.639 --> 00:09:42.240 beats her children names pizza kids. 187 00:09:42.759 --> 00:09:45.279 She would visit my name's crown. 188 00:09:47.759 --> 00:09:51.000 She would visit homes throughout the twelve days of Christmas 189 00:09:51.240 --> 00:09:54.559 and determine whether or not the children had misbehaved or 190 00:09:54.639 --> 00:09:57.720 behaved all year. If they had, she would leave them 191 00:09:57.919 --> 00:10:01.960 a little silver coin if they hadn't you know what 192 00:10:02.000 --> 00:10:02.840 this match. 193 00:10:02.600 --> 00:10:06.440 Would do for a silver coin? I guess actually back 194 00:10:06.440 --> 00:10:08.240 in that time, that was a huge gift. But this ditch, 195 00:10:08.320 --> 00:10:13.559 let me guess it's bad. Uh swirlies in the in 196 00:10:13.600 --> 00:10:16.440 the toilet. That was just a start, sir, is in 197 00:10:16.480 --> 00:10:20.559 the toilet. You make them go balled at eight and 198 00:10:20.600 --> 00:10:22.480 then you cut off, but you give them can and 199 00:10:22.559 --> 00:10:24.919 if you cut off and then you cut off his deck. 200 00:10:25.480 --> 00:10:27.799 Uh No, she actually, if they hadn't been good, she 201 00:10:27.799 --> 00:10:30.960 would slit open their bellies and remove their guts and 202 00:10:31.000 --> 00:10:33.840 then stuff them with like straws and pebbles. 203 00:10:33.960 --> 00:10:39.519 That's pretty much what I just said. Not really, what 204 00:10:39.600 --> 00:10:40.720 kind of swirlies did you get? 205 00:10:40.840 --> 00:10:42.039 You thought cramp was as bad? 206 00:10:42.159 --> 00:10:44.240 He may have drowned you in a bathtub that sounds 207 00:10:44.279 --> 00:10:48.799 peaceful with his pitch and then shoved straw and fucking 208 00:10:48.840 --> 00:10:49.679 stones into. 209 00:10:49.720 --> 00:10:54.559 Anyone who never watched that episode. Drags around a bathtub 210 00:10:55.320 --> 00:10:58.840 like one of those ancient bathtubs, Like it's a fucking 211 00:10:59.200 --> 00:11:01.480 huge like the one that are on legs, Like you know. 212 00:11:01.399 --> 00:11:02.679 What bathtubs I'm talking about. 213 00:11:03.000 --> 00:11:06.279 They're fucking like every grandma had them at one point 214 00:11:06.320 --> 00:11:08.080 in time before it became like a part of your thing. 215 00:11:08.200 --> 00:11:10.440 It's like when parents got divorced. I wanted to be like, 216 00:11:10.480 --> 00:11:12.759 I'm taking the fucking tub with me. I can't do 217 00:11:12.840 --> 00:11:13.360 that anymore. 218 00:11:13.600 --> 00:11:16.559 But yeah, this motherfucker straight up drag around one of 219 00:11:16.600 --> 00:11:19.559 them filled with water no less, like what did it 220 00:11:19.679 --> 00:11:23.799 just brest on his magical fucking anus, like just levitate 221 00:11:23.879 --> 00:11:25.960 there or like or he is ripped out of his 222 00:11:26.080 --> 00:11:26.679 fucking tree. 223 00:11:26.759 --> 00:11:27.279 Yeah, I forgot. 224 00:11:27.279 --> 00:11:29.120 I was gonna hit a bong hit on the podcast 225 00:11:29.200 --> 00:11:31.279 since it's been so long. A good old cheek and 226 00:11:31.320 --> 00:11:33.799 shog bong. Hopefully this goes on YouTube. 227 00:11:37.039 --> 00:11:38.600 In a lot of ways, you remind me of like 228 00:11:38.600 --> 00:11:40.919 a sixteen year old stone In kid that's like, I 229 00:11:40.960 --> 00:11:44.240 think I'm cool because I show what I do. Look 230 00:11:44.279 --> 00:11:46.879 at my or you're the guy on the fucking Facebook 231 00:11:46.879 --> 00:11:48.960 profile he's got a sixty and one hand and a 232 00:11:49.000 --> 00:11:50.519 fucking bb gun in the other. 233 00:11:50.799 --> 00:11:53.720 That's pretty much if you look at when I was fifteen, 234 00:11:54.000 --> 00:11:55.679 there's a picture of my Instagram and it's like me 235 00:11:55.720 --> 00:11:58.200 in front of the fucking mall and we we just. 236 00:11:58.080 --> 00:12:01.879 Stole like this with your buddy, and you're like. 237 00:12:02.159 --> 00:12:05.200 We just stole a fucking mickey and a twenty six 238 00:12:05.320 --> 00:12:09.679 or of fucking Yeah, we stole and during this time. 239 00:12:09.639 --> 00:12:12.639 That's pretty impressive. Went it was raining and we. 240 00:12:12.600 --> 00:12:14.159 Went and then it obviously cleared up because we have 241 00:12:14.279 --> 00:12:16.840 going up six when you're sixteen. But we went in 242 00:12:16.840 --> 00:12:20.679 there so we pretended that like we were waiting for 243 00:12:20.720 --> 00:12:23.320 somebody's ride. But this one kid, Gabe kept giving us 244 00:12:23.360 --> 00:12:24.279 away where he's like. 245 00:12:24.399 --> 00:12:27.759 Is your is your dad answering yeah, like they almost. 246 00:12:27.360 --> 00:12:30.039 Here, like just making it so obvious, and I'm like, 247 00:12:30.080 --> 00:12:31.840 shut the fuck up, And we snuck a twenty six 248 00:12:31.919 --> 00:12:33.480 er in a backpack and a mickey and then we 249 00:12:33.559 --> 00:12:35.480 drank outside the mall and then my mom showed up, 250 00:12:35.639 --> 00:12:37.240 but I was sitting in the food court and I 251 00:12:37.360 --> 00:12:37.879 was drunken. 252 00:12:37.960 --> 00:12:41.720 She did not like that. Yeah, so I think it's crazy. 253 00:12:41.720 --> 00:12:46.840 So like, it's obviously that's intense that uh Pete Tritah 254 00:12:46.919 --> 00:12:49.360 or whatever name is, that she's gonna slit your belly open. 255 00:12:49.480 --> 00:12:53.279 So at the time, is it Patricia, No, no, oh, okay, 256 00:12:53.360 --> 00:12:56.720 just making sure it's Petrata. I bet you it's Patricia. 257 00:12:56.799 --> 00:13:00.720 No, it's Petreta. It's not okay, right whatever. 258 00:13:00.559 --> 00:13:03.559 Think what you one thing? I just want you kind 259 00:13:03.600 --> 00:13:09.679 of I think it's Patria e r c ht A Pertra. Yeah, 260 00:13:09.720 --> 00:13:11.840 that's that's different than what you were saying. I said, 261 00:13:12.879 --> 00:13:15.879 I don't know, I don't know. I don't know anyway. 262 00:13:16.000 --> 00:13:19.039 Yeah, so, like obviously kids would fucking fear Christmas if 263 00:13:19.039 --> 00:13:21.679 you were from wherever this is from. I didn't say, 264 00:13:21.720 --> 00:13:23.960 because most of them are German. This one didn't say 265 00:13:23.960 --> 00:13:25.720 where it was from. I would, I would guess something. 266 00:13:25.759 --> 00:13:27.519 You don't think they if they actually believed that, you 267 00:13:27.519 --> 00:13:30.360 don't think they'd fear Christmas as much as like, actually 268 00:13:30.480 --> 00:13:32.600 just be a fucking well behaved kid all year. 269 00:13:33.320 --> 00:13:34.720 I know, and that's what but I feel like, but 270 00:13:34.759 --> 00:13:36.080 even if you were a good kid. 271 00:13:35.919 --> 00:13:38.679 It'd be like was I good? Like I don't know, 272 00:13:38.799 --> 00:13:40.799 like how is she going to judge me? Like I did, 273 00:13:40.840 --> 00:13:42.840 like stay up a little late that one night I. 274 00:13:42.879 --> 00:13:45.879 Poured the whiskey on top of the fucking old egg nog. 275 00:13:46.039 --> 00:13:48.639 How my whiskey's like fucking gross looking? 276 00:13:49.320 --> 00:13:51.320 Yeah, so, and and I just think it's funny. 277 00:13:51.320 --> 00:13:53.720 I think we should bring that back, like like kids 278 00:13:53.759 --> 00:13:56.679 being afraid at Christmas but also very happy you get 279 00:13:56.720 --> 00:13:58.559 do you know what I mean? If you've been bad, Uh. 280 00:13:58.600 --> 00:14:00.240 I don't think any of those kids are You're in 281 00:14:00.240 --> 00:14:03.080 a whipp I do not think any of those children 282 00:14:03.080 --> 00:14:06.039 were joyful. Actually no, they would have been fine because 283 00:14:06.080 --> 00:14:09.200 like kid about because you would have been young enough that, 284 00:14:09.279 --> 00:14:12.399 like you, when you're young enough right to like not 285 00:14:12.480 --> 00:14:14.480 really think about it until like you're four or five, 286 00:14:15.120 --> 00:14:17.200 and then it doesn't happen to you for two years, 287 00:14:17.200 --> 00:14:17.840 so you're fine. 288 00:14:17.960 --> 00:14:19.759 You're like anything I do, I'll be fine. 289 00:14:19.679 --> 00:14:21.360 I know, and then you still get your presence. That's 290 00:14:21.399 --> 00:14:24.120 why kids are fucking spoiled. But I I want to 291 00:14:24.159 --> 00:14:25.679 bring it back if I have kids all scare the 292 00:14:25.679 --> 00:14:26.320 ship out of it. 293 00:14:26.440 --> 00:14:27.840 Oh that's that's your turning point. 294 00:14:27.840 --> 00:14:29.480 There's a lot of things that parents do, but like 295 00:14:29.559 --> 00:14:33.480 Christmas presents, are you gotta gotta lay down the line. 296 00:14:33.559 --> 00:14:38.639 No Christmas And it's fucking bad you don't have kids. 297 00:14:38.879 --> 00:14:41.480 He's getting the shittiest president or she or whenever I 298 00:14:41.519 --> 00:14:43.559 have kids, If they are bad, they'll know it. And 299 00:14:43.879 --> 00:14:46.440 I'm gonna dress up by crampis and scare the fucking 300 00:14:46.480 --> 00:14:48.679 ship out of them all this dragon. 301 00:14:48.399 --> 00:14:52.320 Bathroom, I'm gonna kids all right? 302 00:14:52.600 --> 00:14:55.360 Uh, Grilaila, how would you say this? 303 00:14:55.480 --> 00:15:04.919 G r y l Ala guy guy Laura from like 304 00:15:05.320 --> 00:15:07.879 so if I don't think anybody's actually going to be 305 00:15:07.919 --> 00:15:10.200 reiterating a story and be like it's gotta be green, 306 00:15:11.000 --> 00:15:11.480 we all. 307 00:15:11.360 --> 00:15:14.200 Have some fu angry fans from Iceland being like it's 308 00:15:14.240 --> 00:15:18.039 bronouncela Icelander. 309 00:15:18.200 --> 00:15:19.159 You are you guys? 310 00:15:20.000 --> 00:15:22.159 That tastes fucking weird because there's just just a little 311 00:15:22.200 --> 00:15:23.320 bit of eggnogging my whiskey. 312 00:15:23.440 --> 00:15:28.600 You think you think people are from Icelander sensitive. I 313 00:15:28.600 --> 00:15:30.279 don't want to don't put that in there. I do 314 00:15:30.399 --> 00:15:32.759 not want more. You just said, oh it tastes weird. 315 00:15:33.039 --> 00:15:33.639 I don't like it. 316 00:15:33.639 --> 00:15:35.440 I don't want more eggnog. I want I want to 317 00:15:35.440 --> 00:15:36.000 pure whiskey. 318 00:15:36.240 --> 00:15:38.159 She's like literally like a fucking like. 319 00:15:38.799 --> 00:15:41.159 Also, for all the listeners that are watching on the video, 320 00:15:41.440 --> 00:15:44.919 we have a gay little nutcracker and a hockey nutcracker. 321 00:15:45.039 --> 00:15:48.480 This guy is flamboyant fucking Freddy and this guy is uh. 322 00:15:48.559 --> 00:15:51.120 I hate fucking hockey. I don't care. 323 00:15:52.960 --> 00:15:54.440 Wayne Gretzky. 324 00:15:54.399 --> 00:15:57.159 Yeah, the biggest piece of ship. His dad just got wrong. 325 00:15:57.240 --> 00:16:00.240 I heard that by a by a fucking cop, no, 326 00:16:00.320 --> 00:16:02.480 a friend like, and it was a cop, of course, 327 00:16:02.759 --> 00:16:03.759 Brantford cops. 328 00:16:03.799 --> 00:16:06.279 Why we say fuck the poet. Like, so they're saying, 329 00:16:06.320 --> 00:16:08.120 they're saying, they were saying that. 330 00:16:08.240 --> 00:16:10.360 The news and I came home from working there and 331 00:16:10.360 --> 00:16:13.559 watching there they're talking about it, and the news ladies 332 00:16:13.600 --> 00:16:17.759 like and another news Walter Gretzky today got robbed by 333 00:16:17.759 --> 00:16:21.639 a close friend along with the Branford opp officer. And 334 00:16:21.639 --> 00:16:25.120 then in her same breath, in her exact same breath, 335 00:16:25.159 --> 00:16:29.639 goes uh. Waterloo Regions also looking for more donations towards 336 00:16:29.639 --> 00:16:32.320 their police force. And I was like, wow, you kind 337 00:16:32.320 --> 00:16:34.919 of just did a fucking stab on yourself there. You're like, 338 00:16:34.919 --> 00:16:37.080 look at this crooked cop, please give us money. 339 00:16:37.399 --> 00:16:40.080 So if you're living in uh, well, I think that's fun. 340 00:16:40.120 --> 00:16:42.159 I think that's fucked got fun. I was like, what 341 00:16:42.879 --> 00:16:45.240 Walter's the nice I hate hockey. 342 00:16:47.000 --> 00:16:49.480 He got a lot of mental ship, you. 343 00:16:49.440 --> 00:16:52.159 Know, because he praises his son. He's literally lived off 344 00:16:52.159 --> 00:16:54.399 of his son's fame. That's all he does is talking 345 00:16:54.399 --> 00:16:55.000 about his son. 346 00:16:55.200 --> 00:16:55.600 This guy. 347 00:16:55.679 --> 00:16:58.240 Okay, if you're a sports fan, if you know fucking 348 00:16:58.279 --> 00:16:59.120 hockey at all, you'll. 349 00:16:59.000 --> 00:17:01.519 Know who anyone who knows he comes. 350 00:17:01.639 --> 00:17:03.840 He comes from the city that like Billy used to 351 00:17:03.879 --> 00:17:04.160 live in. 352 00:17:04.279 --> 00:17:07.920 And I really good friends with his nephew too, of course. 353 00:17:08.279 --> 00:17:10.319 And then but Wayne Gretzey, you won't come to Branford. 354 00:17:10.319 --> 00:17:12.599 He'll stay somewhere else. If he's coming here to do something, 355 00:17:12.680 --> 00:17:13.839 he's come here. 356 00:17:14.119 --> 00:17:15.039 He has come here. 357 00:17:15.359 --> 00:17:17.720 But he won't stay in Branford because he fucking hates 358 00:17:17.759 --> 00:17:21.160 brandfand so. But like his dad is like a guy, 359 00:17:21.279 --> 00:17:22.440 you'll see him, Yeah, I. 360 00:17:22.359 --> 00:17:24.880 Do, right, you guys very postcards. 361 00:17:24.920 --> 00:17:27.640 No, I told my fucking I hate the sport that 362 00:17:27.759 --> 00:17:32.440 made you. There was never hockey, you wouldn't exist. Uh, 363 00:17:32.599 --> 00:17:36.000 if you're to get into the next greenlaw, that's what 364 00:17:36.039 --> 00:17:38.519 I'm gonna call her. If you're a child living in Iceland, 365 00:17:38.519 --> 00:17:41.640 you've probably been warned about the legend of the Gila, 366 00:17:43.079 --> 00:17:46.680 the giantess to fucking giant who lives in the mountains 367 00:17:46.680 --> 00:17:49.880 and comes out of her caves in the wintertime searching 368 00:17:50.160 --> 00:17:51.519 for naughty little kids. 369 00:17:51.599 --> 00:17:53.759 Fucking anti hibernating cunt. 370 00:17:54.200 --> 00:17:56.720 Yeah, I know what, Kate, do you use that word 371 00:17:56.759 --> 00:17:57.200 fans good? 372 00:17:57.799 --> 00:17:59.880 Oh yeah, there was that one that didn't like Yeah, 373 00:18:00.079 --> 00:18:03.119 didn't like that. I said the word. I don't like 374 00:18:03.160 --> 00:18:05.839 what you said on your uncensored podcast. 375 00:18:06.000 --> 00:18:08.799 Yeah, I know, says explicit on our ship. 376 00:18:08.920 --> 00:18:11.359 It's like, it's how many things did you listen to before? 377 00:18:11.480 --> 00:18:13.359 Like that, that's the one. 378 00:18:14.160 --> 00:18:17.440 It's like they can talk about like kids getting molested, 379 00:18:17.559 --> 00:18:20.519 and they can talk about kids getting murdered. Fuck who 380 00:18:20.599 --> 00:18:23.319 cares about like any any poor kids? 381 00:18:23.599 --> 00:18:27.039 Fuck them? But like I have, I have a cunt 382 00:18:27.440 --> 00:18:28.559 and that offends me. 383 00:18:28.880 --> 00:18:30.519 You should take your one ear out of the thing. 384 00:18:30.559 --> 00:18:33.359 Your not sticking up. We're also wearing like Santa Claus. 385 00:18:33.359 --> 00:18:35.359 There you go, there's Pokemon now beel he's got the lphat. 386 00:18:35.359 --> 00:18:38.079 I got a Santa hat. It's fun, it's fun Christmas times. 387 00:18:38.119 --> 00:18:45.119 I'm gonna gotta make a Christmas card again. You're ready, ready? Yeah? 388 00:18:45.200 --> 00:18:48.720 So so it comes out in the search for Naught 389 00:18:48.720 --> 00:18:52.759 of kids. When she finds them, she boils them up 390 00:18:52.799 --> 00:18:55.640 into a stew and devours them as a tasty snack. 391 00:18:55.920 --> 00:18:58.119 This is how people think, like, it's so joyous in 392 00:18:58.200 --> 00:19:01.240 the Christmas music, and I'm going to shop and spend 393 00:19:01.480 --> 00:19:04.440 billions of dollars. Not billions, I spend thousand dollars to 394 00:19:04.480 --> 00:19:07.519 get myself in it the debt over this holiday. But 395 00:19:07.559 --> 00:19:10.000 this holiday is literally based on somebody coming to take 396 00:19:10.039 --> 00:19:12.000 your naughty children and fuck it. But this, I feel 397 00:19:12.039 --> 00:19:13.559 like this is what they had to do, because back 398 00:19:13.599 --> 00:19:16.920 then your kids are like going outside and shoving sticks 399 00:19:16.960 --> 00:19:19.680 up each other's asses and then you're touching their tant 400 00:19:19.680 --> 00:19:20.480 and running away. 401 00:19:20.559 --> 00:19:23.599