Speaker 1: I made a decision.
Speaker 2: Sunny Sun yet on I had a visions night. What's happening? Everybody?
Welcome to for crying out loud. This is gonna be
a little bit of a tough episode. Yeah, but we'll
keep it light and tight. It'll be fun, light and tight,
light and light and sweet baby.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Well huh so okay, I guess. First of all, I
want to thank everybody on our for crying out loud page,
so many messages for the posts that I posted about
the passing of Phil. It was one week ago today.
Speaker 1: I can't believe it's been one one week ago today.
When you were like, oh, Phil wasn't able to stand
up this morning, I had to leave him, Like yeah,
so I wasn't so Phil.
Speaker 2: Back in October, Phil started having trouble standing up, and like,
once he was up, he could walk, but he seemed
really stiff. So he took him to the vet and
the vet did X rays and said, you know, he
basically has some little inflammation in his spine and calcium
build up or something like that, basically like arthritisy kind
of thing. Here's the pain medicine, and give it to
him twice a day every twelve hours and he should
be okay. So he was back to normal after that,
and he was going on his walks. I would take
him on hikes sometimes, and you know, Phil is kind
of a pain in the ass to take for walk though,
because he's he's not very energetic. He likes to lay
down a lot, so he doesn't we don't go too far,
but you know, I take him for a walk once
or twice a day. He's perfectly happy just laying around
in the backyard with me too. So that morning, now
here's the weird thing. You gave me the rest of
people's pain medicine, which was the exact same milligram, the
exact same medicine that I have to get for Phil.
So I started giving him that pain medicine on Friday
before Monday. So when he was having trouble walking, I
had to leave to come here. He got up and
went out to the bathroom, but then he was like
down for the count. I could tell something was bothering him,
and I thought, I said to you, I thought, maybe
I'm giving him something different. Maybe it's a different you know,
I don't know, it was the same.
Speaker 1: You thought maybe it was generic. But it was like
somehow different. Yeah, different manufacturer.
Speaker 2: Right, So after we left the podcast, I went and
picked up his medicine. So when I got home, he
moved from I left him in my bedroom. He moved
across the house to the bathroom. He likes to be
in the bathroom. It's cool, the tile's cool. And he
was just down in the bathroom and he couldn't get up.
And I got home. I gave him the pain medicine
and I gave it like an hour and a half
two hours to kick in. I sat in the bathroom
with him. I gave him one of his bones that
he loves to lick, has peanut butter in the middle.
So I kept him busy and I kept trying to
get him up. He just would not couldn't get up.
And then at one point, like I put a heating
pad on him, and I was waiting for the medicine
to kick in. I was doing a chat GPT about it,
and so I took a towel like a harness. I
slipped it under his body and I lifted him up
and he was able to walk out.
Speaker 1: Because he was in there all day.
Speaker 2: I wanted him to go to the bathroom, so I
got him up to the backyard. He sort of walked
and then he plopped down, couldn't get to the grass.
And then I sat there a little long, like let
him rest for a little bit. And then at one
point he got up and walked to the grass and
went to the bathroom, and I was like, oh great,
and then he came back and then he laid back
down and he just could not He could not get up.
And I was reading if they knuckle drag their pause
in the back, that's a bad sign, and he was
doing that. He couldn't put his paws flat. So I
was like, I got to take him to the emergency room.
So I had, but I can't. How am I going
to put this guy in the car. He weighs one
hundred and four pounds, is what they said. So I
went to my neighbors and the husband came and he
helped me. Now it's like eight o'clock and I get
him in the car and I take him to the
emergency Vet hospital and waited for a long time. I
was there until like two in the morning. Yeah, we
with him in the car. No, they they got him
on a gurney out of the car, took him to
the back. But you know, it's a vet hospital if
there's an emergency, you know, for other dogs. He's not
priority right now. So we waited for a long long
time and then the doctor came in and she's said,
you know, he doesn't have I tested his back paws.
He doesn't have any feeling at all, and she said,
the only way we can see what's going on is
to do an MRI, and an MRI is very expensive.
Oh no, yeah, so hmm. I was like, okay, let's
do the MRI. He stayed there overnight. Then the next
day they called and they said, he's got a lot
of slip discs in his spine and he needs surgery.
Speaker 1: How did he get those?
Speaker 2: I think that he probably had that back in October,
but his vet didn't do an MRI. They just did
an X ray, and I think it was being masked
by the pain medicines this whole time. So they said, yeah,
he had like three slip discs and we need to
you know, do surgery. And it doesn't guarantee that he's
going to have you know, he's going to be able
to walk again. It's fifty to fifty that's what they
told me.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so but then they were like, but he's fairly
young and he's otherwise really healthy. That's yeah, you told me, yes,
that's right.
Speaker 2: So I had note. I was like, okay, well we
got you know, let's do the surgery. And I called
Sonny and Sonny got really upset and he wanted to
fly home. So he flew home on Tuesday. And then
Tuesday he had his surgery Tuesday evening and they said,
you know, it was more than we thought, more than
the MRI showed, and it was a big surgery. He
lost a lot of blood, but you know, he's recovery.
So Tuesday went by and now like, we can go
visit him. So Sonny and I went to visit him.
And when we saw him and the ICU, he was
laying on the They had him on blankets on the
floor and he was just you know, huffing and puffing
and he couldn't wag his tail. And Sonny was a mess,
and you know, so was I. It was really sad,
and then we were so now I'm thinking how much long?
How long am I going to give it? You know,
how long can it take? And then I'm looking into
these places that well that this hospital has a medical
boarding after surgery. They take the dogs in this and
it's not as expensive as the hospital and they can
take them and they can help, you know, get them better.
And you know, the doctors was like, you know, could
be a week, could be two weeks, could be never.
Speaker 1: We don't know.
Speaker 2: So, you know, he did have a lot of surgery.
You know, he needs to rest. It was a big surgery.
So let's give it, you know, some time. So you know,
Tuesday went into Wednesday, we went to visit him, and
Natalia came home on Friday and she went to visit
him and.
Speaker 1: She was a mess.
Speaker 2: And Sonny called Adam and Adam was out of town.
But then he was going to try and visit him,
but he I don't think he ever got there. And then,
I mean every morning they would call with an update,
and every morning I'm praying, like, is there going to
be good news, and every morning it was the same,
he's not his legs are not moving well. Then Monday
came and.
Speaker 1: We expected at that point, I mean, I was getting
a lot of updates from you, but it was hard
because they were like, well, we just don't know exactly exactly.
Speaker 2: And then some you would get a different doctor. This
doctor would come in or this whoever was on staff
or whatever. So yeah, and then Monday came and we
were going to do our podcast, but I got really sick.
There was something going There was a flu going around
in the hospital. One of the doctors wasn't coming in
because she got The one I was talking to got
really sick. So I had like the flu. So I
was feeling horrible and then I said to you, I
think that they're gonna call me. They called me in
the morning and they said Phil had took taken a
turn for the worse. He has a fever and he's
showing infection and we will have to either take him
from where he's at right now and take him into
critical care and start figuring out where the infection is.
Could be septists, you know. And she said, but I'm
very concerned. I'm watching him just suffer, so you guys
need to come here immediately. So Sonny and I went
over there on Monday. And it was weird because Olga
called while we were at the hospital and she was
up the street, so she came and then he was like, yeah,
have Olga com like for support, So she came over
to the hospital and then the doctors came to talk
to us and they said, even if we treat him
in critical care with he may have all these different
infections and it's going to be a lot on his
body and he still doesn't have any use or feeling
in his legs. So we had to make the decision
to let him go, and we did. We didn't want
him suffering. And yeah, and it was like we were
a mess. And they brought him into this room and
you know, it was like lightly lit with a little
couch and he was he was in his little bed
they made for him, and we just sat there for
like like an hour. Sonny's face was right up to
his face, looking in his eyes, telling him he loves him.
I was telling him, thank you for being such a
great dog to us, and him thank you Phil.
Speaker 1: You know, it was just such a great dog.
Speaker 2: And it was just too soon. It was too soon.
He was only ten, it was only two. And you
know the weird thing I think I told you this
is when Sonny was home for Super Bowl. We were
playing with Phil and I said, just Sonny, I said,
I hate that.
Speaker 1: I said this.
Speaker 2: I said, you know, he's ten years old and he's
in great shape. His hips are great, you know, if
he plays his cards right and stopped, you know, doesn't
eat anything like he's got, I've probably got another five
or six years for you know. And I said that,
and Sonny was like, I know, I remember you said that.
It was like me a couple of weeks earlier, and
it was really too soon. He was such a great dog,
and he was my pal, and he was my buddy,
and he slept with me every single night and followed
me everywhere, and he loves Sonny so much.
Speaker 1: And Sonny and then I lay next to him.
Speaker 2: And I thanked him and I kissed him right on
his lips and he gave me a big lick. And
then the doctor came in and you know, explained what
would happen, and you know, he was quiet and peaceful,
and he went very peacefully.
Speaker 1: So yeah, it was really tough. It was a hard week.
And I can't believe it's only been one week and.
Speaker 2: Sonny has stayed with me. He's going home tomorrow. He's
his teachers have been very great with him and understanding,
and uh, he wanted to stay.
Speaker 1: With me and didn't want me to be alone.
Speaker 2: And he wanted to just kind of hang Like the
two of us we ate dinner together every night and
hung out. We've been hanging and we've been I mean
Sonny watching him that whole week and talking to the
doctors and asking questions and visiting him. It was like
having a partner with me. I wasn't alone and making decisions.
I didn't want to make this decision on my own,
you know. And Sonny has just shown me what a
great young man he's grown into in these situations.
Speaker 1: And I'm very proud of him.
Speaker 2: And he got a really nice text from his dad
saying basically the same thing, that he's proud of him.
And so we have a candle that's been burning. We've
been burning a lot of candles, and we have a
little couple pictures of him up in our kitchen and
our painting that we have of him that we got
from Robert Phelps, and you know, just.
Speaker 1: The house is like empty. So it's so weird because
when I just went through this, Xander, I was like
in protect the kid's mind. That's how I was. Then
Xander was like I want to be there, you know.
When I was when I was like, this is the
day it's happening. We planned it on a day that
he was going to school, and we were thinking, like,
we got to protect the kids. They don't need to
be there for you. And Xander was like, no, I
want to be I want to be home, right right,
And then John goes, well, I mean he's eighteen, like yeah,
almost eighteen at the time he was seven. But he
was like, it's like a very adult kind of decision.
But if that's what he wants to do, like far
be it from us to go like, no, you can't
be there. So he and Sadie stayed home. And he
was such a man. Yeah, I told you he was.
He and John walked he Bow's body out to the
and I couldn't do it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I know, I know, I know, I know. When
we left the room, finally I went up to pay
and Sonny kept looking back at the room and he goes,
I just want to go back one more time, and
he went back into the room.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but.
Speaker 1: That was his buddy. That was his buddy. They went
on their lung walks. To be kind of shocking to
have like just been at school for.
Speaker 2: I know, it was just happened so sudden, and I
wasn't too worried about it. Monday morning when I was here,
I'm like, no, he'll be you know, because he got
better last time. He's you know, so I was like.
Speaker 1: It seems like he's been through worse.
Speaker 2: Right, it's exactly right, but he just couldn't ever recover.
And I didn't want to see him. He was suffering.
He was huffing and puffed, did the right thing. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, these dogs, they you know, like we just don't
even deserve them, like, you know, they don't need to
go through.
Speaker 2: No, no, no, he was not the whole week. He
was not in good shape. Yeah.
Speaker 1: So it's so hard because we have to make these
decisions for them because they can't. They can't tell us
like let me go, you know. So you know I
had it was so so brutal with Penelope because there
were times where she was fine.
Speaker 2: Right right, it's tough, how do you know? And I
feel like Phil was telling us when he got worse.
And when we saw him that day, he was tough
and I wanted him to stop. He was panting so
hard and he could barely like lift his head to us.
We were just like laying right next to him with
their face right in front of him, and you know,
he knew we were there, but he was not well
and I didn't want to continue, you know, the suffering.
Speaker 1: I'm so sorry, and as I already told you, but
I'll say it again. When John found out, John started crying. Oh.
I mean obviously it probably triggered, but he's heard the
Phil's stories and I you know, been part of our
show a little bit, and he was just like, oh
my god, please tell on it. Thank you, Thank you,
John hurt Her, No, thank you John and everybody.
Speaker 2: I mean, I know and I've read every single messages.
And also one last thing I want to say is
I'm working with this organization called Frankie's Friends and their
nonprofit across the country, and I'm setting up a memorial
page where with a link and you can donate for
people families that needed funds and that you know and
that when they get put in that position. If I
didn't have money, I don't know what I would have done.
You know, it's scary, and it's a lot of money.
It's costly, and I read all the stories of families
that they've helped, and Betty White's on the page with
her thing and they help so many families that in
an emergency like that for their dogs.
Speaker 1: That's so beautiful. They're called Frankie's Friends.
Speaker 2: I think it's I will definitely by next week, we'll
have the page up and I will have the link
and I will let you guys know. But yeah, yeah,
put it on our Facebook page and definitely definitely will.
Isn't it crazy that, like the first thing one of
the things I thought was like, to get you a
painting because but then I was like, this is so
weird because he just made you a painting.
Speaker 1: Yeahn though fills alive and right right, And I was like,
oh my god, yeah, the black fucking mirror episode. I know, right,
it's crazy. It's so weird.
Speaker 2: I thought about that, like the two of us parallel lives.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but also just that he made you that painting.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I will post that painting. Yeah I
should have posted it.
Speaker 1: And now it's like a memorial. Yeah yeah.
Speaker 2: We we had it like in our house kind of
in the back, but I moved it up front on
the wall so you see it right when you walk in.
Speaker 1: It's so hard because you know, you miss of course
them and their smell and their presence and all of that,
But then you also like it leaves you so I mean,
you're not trying to make this worse, Like I'm just
going to make it worse. Yeah, you have two kids
at school, and it leaves you with this absence of
a creature to be taken care of you needed to be.
It's happy to see you when you get home.
Speaker 2: Yeah, like, yeah, it's just yeah, the worl it's the worst. Yeah,
you know, And eventually I'll probably get another dog, but
not right now.
Speaker 1: I don't. No, I'm still like mourning. Of course it's
been a week.
Speaker 2: It's only been a week, and his hair is everywhere still, Yeah,
clean up his toys when I got home. Really sad,
but I'm so happy I have Sunny with me.
Speaker 1: I mean, and then you were freaking sick on top
of it. I was sick, I know, just at the
tail end of it. Well you had just started I
don't I think you had just started antibiotics last week. Yeah,
you didn't even not come in. You didn't come in
because you were sick, right, not even because of Phil,
That's right, right, you were just like, I'm really sick.
You said, I have a really bad caught yes, and
then I then you said you were going to go
I was going to get the by the doctor or whatever,
and you get antibiotics you were just starting them and
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Speaker 1: Do so in other medical news, I'm back in the
UTI game.
Speaker 2: I know, Stephanie at Ah, what is with us?
Speaker 1: Why does this happen? And I don't even know why
I have a UTI because I've been using my estradiol cright,
But I okay, and I will tell you all about
this too. But I went to a state qualifiers speech
and debate competition, yes, with Sander, and I was a judge.
And you know, I get a lot of stories, got
a lot of mileage from speech and debate. I love it.
Some people are kind of catty and don't really like
all the speech and debate stories. Well guess what motherfuckers
I do to sell there? Also, they're almost done, okay, yes,
like this was our last thing? Huh, well not our
very last thing, which I'll get to. Yeah, But so
this was a big thing and I was required to
go judge on Saturday, so Friday, so Xander did I
talk about this on the thing before that this. So
he competed in one other speech event that I told
you about, but he did not write his original oratory
speech because he's been so busy doing other things. He's
in school play and I told you, and I told him,
just stop, don't try to do speech on top of that. Yeah.
So he went to the speech event and he did
improv duos, and he did this thing called impromptu, which
is they give you a topic and you make up
a speech off the top of your head. Yeah, for
five minutes. Right. Neither prep. So you can just go
to the competition and compete in those events. But he
had this thing where he was like, I want to
write a speech. I want to write an o oh
speech for this weekend for one time. I want to
at least compete with it one time. Okay, it's his thing,
but he still hadn't done it because he's been doing
his play rehearsals. So I was like, at one point,
I just said, if you don't want to do it,
just don't do it. It's totally fine, but I'm gonna
I have to judge now, so I'm going to go
either way at this point, and he goes, I'm doing it.
I'm writing this speech and I'm going to do it.
And I was like, okay, So now it's the speech.
Thing was on Saturday, Saturday, and Sunday. So now it's
like Thursday. He so, Wednesday he's writing a speech and
I'm like, are you fucking kidding me? It's a ten
minute speech that has to be fully memorized. Oh wow,
I can't have notes. You can't have note cards, you
can't have bullet points. It has to be in your
mind and ten minutes. Imagine. I'm like, I can't memorize
something that's thirty seconds. I couldn't memorize that much, right,
he has to memorize ten minutes of material. So and
he didn't. He wasn't written. So he went good under
pressure apparently, so because let me tell you what happened.
So Wednesday he's writing, but it's not done. Thursday he's writing,
he's writing it in different classes at school. Thursday night
he stays up until midnight, finishes his speech. He's not
talking to me about it. So in my mind, I'm like, well,
he's not feeling good about this because he's not running
anything by me. He's not trying to run the speech.
He's not reading it to me. And I'm like, okay,
I guess he's just going to go throw some shit
against the wall. Yeah. But he tells me on Friday,
he's like, I'm doing the speech tomorrow and I go okay,
and he goes, I got to memorize it today, right.
He finished writing at Thursday night at midnight. Oh my god.
So Friday he's just like, I'm learning it today. He
learns the speech and he's like, I'm going to the competition,
and I go, okay, whatever you want to do. Meanwhile,
So this category, ooh, original oratory is a hard category.
It's a big category because it's one of the few
categories where people are writing something original, like about their
life or about something they're passionate about. A lot of
the other things are like there's a thing called declamation,
and that's where you learn somebody else's speech. It's a
ten minute speech, but it could be like Obama or
somebody did a really cool one that was Malcolm X.
But you're reading someone else's speech, so you don't have
to write anything. Yeah, go and look up some Ted
talks like how the speech you like? But this original
oratory is like, it's got to be good, it's got
to be researched. I'm like, I have zero expectations because
it's like a lot of really good kids and a
lot of these kids have been working on their speech
since twenty twenty five. Wow, because the season started in
October of last year. Now we're in March. So some
of these kids have done these there's speech like thirty times, yeah,
you know, forty times at this point. They've gone to
different events. So I'm like, I'm giving them a pep
talk and just going, don't be hard on yourself, Like
I think you're already killing it. You wrote something like
just showing up is so cool? Oh yeah, how cool
are you? Yeah? You like I would never have done
that yet. Yeah, no, get her here. I'm like if
I didn't, if I wasn't being paid, if somebody was like,
you know what, you don't have to do it, I'd
be like, great, I'm not doing it.
Speaker 2: Then.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I did nothing in high school. I had no
there's no motivation. I cannot believe that he does so
many things. So I'm just in awe. I don't know
where you came from, right, but like, good for you. Yeah.
So anyway, I went there with my friend Julie because
her daughter was doing it too. I remember last year
I went with Tamra, my pat Tamra a lot, but
this year Tamra's kid is already at Berkeley. So so
we go to the competition. Xander has not at this
point said anything about anything. He's just I'm like, why
are you so chill? He goes, I'm not, I'm really nervous. Wow, Okay,
he's not running the speech, and it's so he told
me later he went and like did the speech to
a wall, and then he went into his first thing.
I went off to judge, So you don't get to
see it. You don't never get to see it because
I'm judging other things. Right, I don't never get to
judge my own kid. I don't get to judge anyone
from our school. So while he's competing, I'm judging other things.
So he does his first round. They get two rounds
on Saturday. He does two, and I judged four rounds
for that day, he only had two rounds. Afterwards, he goes, honestly,
because I would see him, I would pass him, you know,
And he was like, I feel good. He's like, mom,
I said the whole speech and I did not. I
didn't mess up, I didn't forget anything. I'm just proud
of myself for getting through it. And I was like, well,
that's amazing for you. Yeah, yeah, fucking great, you know.
And he does his second round and he's like, oh
the first round, he goes, Okay, he goes, it didn't
totally affect me, he goes, But there was a woman
who was like mad dogging me, oh wow. And I
don't know what the speech is at this point. Yeah,
though I do know. He told me that he is
talking about being trans in the speech. So I'm like, what,
had you already said that you're trans? And he goes, yeah,
he goes. I don't know if she's like transphobic. I
don't know why, but she was just giving me such
a crazy look. And she was one of the judges.
One of the judges. So this is a big event.
State qualify, so whoever gets and it's very hard to
qualify for state, so they every room has three judges
instead of one. Okay, because they don't trust you could
have a shitty judge, and so you have to have
other people to bounce it off of, not to you
don't get to discuss, but you have like three different
points of view on your speech, right, and a lot
of times people have very different opinions. Yeah. Yes, so
there's usually like six people in a round about like
five or six people. So anyway, so he was really
upset about it. He goes, I'm telling you, this lady
was giving me such dirty looks. Yeah. So then the
coach later talks to me and she's like, yeah, he
told me, she goes, But I went and checked what
score she gave him, and she gave him second. I
was like, oh, she goes. So I don't really want
to take it any further because I don't want them
to disqualify that score because it's great. Yeah. So I
was like, okay. So then that night our coach texts
me and she goes, Zam does not want to know
how he's doing. He just wants to just have no
pressure and just do his thing. She goes, but do
you want to know how he's doing? And I was like, hell, yes, right,
So she goes, he got a three, a two, and
a one on his first round, which is fantastic, but
he ranked him number one. Wow. And he goes and
on his second round he got two two one and
I was like, that's crazy. What what He literally memorized
the speech yesterday And she goes, I know, he just
wrote it. He just wrote it. He's never practiced it,
not one time. That is amazing, and she goes, it
must be a good speech. So then I said, so
then there was another preliminary round Sunday morning. She goes,
she was funny. She goes, basically, he could kind of
shit the bed on this third round and still make
it to semi finals. So there's three rounds, a semi finals,
and then a finals. Ok. And goes, I think he's
going to be in semi finals unless something went pretty wrong, right,
Like he's looking good for the semi finals. So I
was like, okay. So his third round, he's like, honestly, again,
I feel pretty good. Like I did my thing again,
I didn't mess up, I didn't get a time violation,
Like I'm happy with myself. Yeah, Like that's kind of
right because normally he's like, I don't know, I have
no idea how I did. Like yeah, So then I
find out that his third round he got again a one,
a two, and a three. Oh my, great god, that's insane.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: So then he broke to the semi finals. So then
the semi finals are two rooms of six kids, right,
and then out of that there's going to be a
finals round, which is seven kids. Okay, So he does
his semi finals round and coach comes up to me
and she's like, he did good. Oh my, he's going
to be in finals.
Speaker 2: Wow.
Speaker 1: Yeah. So I was just like going crazy because oh
I just was like kept texting John. I'm like, this
is insane. Like this kid wrote this speech, you know,
two days ago. He just finished it, and he just
memorized it in one day. And he's and didn't we
run it by it? Yeah, nobody that never practiced it
was not practicing it in between. This is as compared
to last year when he wrote that speech about like
toxic masculine and was constantly practicing it. To me, Remember
I told you I was like getting bored.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I was like, okay, I've heard this so many
times and then timing it for him and it would
go over none of that. He was just like doing
his own thing. Wow. Anyway, text, So then he went
to the finals and then there's an award ceremony and
now I have no idea. So out of seven kids,
as far as I knew, only four we're going to
qualify for state. And he was one of them. So
he ended up coming he and up tied for first place.
Oh my, the entire company. That's amazing that.
Speaker 2: How much you you must feel like so flipping proud.
So then I mean I was like in total absolute shock.
I was just like felt like I was having a
I was like, what is happening? Because so, as I've
told you before, they call the names from seventh place,
and then when they get to fourth so there were
five actually it turned out five people qualified. So they
get to fifth place, and then they say in fifth
place and qualifying for state from Burbank High School.
Speaker 1: This name. So every time they say the high school,
first you know it's not your high school? Yeah, right,
so they say it, and then they so they do,
they get to they do seventh place, sixth place, So
I'm like, holy shitty qualified for state, right, and then
they say the name and it's not Xander, and I'm like,
oh my god, he did better than fifth he did
better than fifth place. And then they go in fourth
place and it's not Xander, and I was like, I
keep looking at the coach going, wait, what is going on?
And then they're like in third place, not Xander, And
then second place was Xander. But then the head of
the thing told our coach he actually he technically qualified
tied ten first. Wow, that is so yeah. So then
that night he was so he's so tired. He missed
two days of tech rehearsal for his play, and then
he had there was no way he could stay home
from school today because if you stay home from school,
you can't do your after school activity, which is tech
rehearsal for his play which opens on Thursday. Oh my god,
this kid, I know. So he was like sick. I mean,
he has like scratchy throat, not feeling great. But I
was like, do you want to just stay home? And
he goes, I can't, No, I have to go. So
I was like, okay. So last night he did the
speech for us, for me and John and Sadie Lynette.
It was so well written. Really, another coach slash judge
who judged his final round told our coach, that's the
best speech I've seen all weekend. Wow. I mean, it
was such a beautiful speech. I bet it was all
about how the word normal, Where the word normal comes from,
and how the word normal comes from, like a mathematical
term about like a straight line and a perpendicular line.
It's kind of complicated, yeah, but he's it's basically about
how a long time ago they came up with this
word normal, which leaves a lot of people I guess
as abnormal. So if you're not this kind of perfect specimen,
you're in some way abnormal. And then he starts and
then he talks about how he's trans and and how
so people have been programmed to believe that something off
of what they consider normal is like a glitch. Right,
he goes, and then it's basically like I'm not a glitch, right,
I'm and how but he compares it all to the
Wei and the we balance board, and how when he
was a kid he got on the Wii balance board
and they tell you you're BMI, and then BMIs was
also something that was like created has nothing really to
do with your actual health, right, it was like a
made up anyway. It was so beautiful and so smart,
and I was literally listening to it going, I don't
know where he came from. Death's so great, that is
says I didn't go to college. I am not as
not nearly as smart as this kid or John. John's
really smart too. Well get it from John.
Speaker 2: I mean, I'm sure he gets from both of you guys,
because you're a great writer too.
Speaker 1: But I mean John is really creative and really really smart. Yeah, yeah,
just I'm telling you. I was like, he is a
goal getter have written something like that. But John was like,
I couldn't either write never could I have written something
like that at eighteen years old. Yeah, and in two days.
That's insane.
Speaker 2: That is, I would be like bursting with joy and pride.
Speaker 1: Unbelievable.
Speaker 2: I'm so happy for him, town congratulations that you know.
Speaker 1: It's hard, is like having a twin and another kid. Yeah,
it's so it's hard when like one kid is doing
so much and then getting celebrated all the time and
getting all this outside validation. Right, It's so hard because
you don't want to be like, but Sadie, you're great too.
Oh like that you don't want to be fae. Yeah yeah,
And it's like, and Sadie is so great in her
own way obviously, right, but that's just like a hard thing.
And think of how hard you and I both worked
when the twins were little to like make things even. Yeah, right,
and you reach a certain point where it's kind of
to them like what they do with right right themselves?
Yeah that is tough.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, but they're both like they're both great in
their own ways, you know. And I mean that's an
insane that's amazing what he did. Just so now he's
going to the finals, the state finals.
Speaker 1: He's going to the state finals in Union City, California.
You know, let's do let's talk about hero Yeah, hero bread.
We love it.
Speaker 2: We love hero bread and you know it's it's one
of our favorite breads and Olga loves it too. And
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fiver from the texture, So you get the soft, fluffy
experience that you know and love, but it's packed with
you know, they have wraps, they have bagels, they have tortillas,
they have noodles and bread loafs and we love it
and my kids love it. Yeah, and you know it's
good for you and it's not going to give you
all those carbs from like the regular bread.
Speaker 1: Yeah, tells how to get it.
Speaker 2: So hero Bread is offering ten percent off your order.
You can go to hero dot co and use the
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Speaker 1: Yeah. So wow, what a weekend. Yeah, crazy weekend. But meanwhile, sorry,
more about me now. Meanwhile, I want to say on Saturday,
I just started to feel that feeling, the UTI feeling,
and I was like I couldn't have a uti could
I like, I haven't been doing anything wrong. I have
been having like crazy wild sex. I haven't been like
eating a bunch of sugar. I was like why why?
I know I was tired. You know sometimes I think
you can get run down and yeah, maybe get an infection.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think so, I don't know how it happened
aing like I'm not I don't know.
Speaker 1: So I was like you know when you're in denial,
well first because I was like maybe I'm just having
to pee a lot, right, And I was like I
don't know why I'm not drinking like a lot of water. Yeah,
And I was like, maybe I should drink more water.
I was like, why do I keep feeling like I
have to pee over the day?
Speaker 2: Get home while you're doing the judging at the school.
Speaker 1: Yes, oh god. So then I'm having that feeling and
I'm at a school that I don't know. Yeah, and
I'm like, I have to find the bathroom. I'm looking
for bathrooms and like.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, that's the worst feeling around with my
broken foot. I'm wandering around with my stupid flat foot
shoe for my broken fright going has anybody seen a
bathroom and then having to go back to the bathroom,
hoof it to the freaking bathroom like eight times.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's an infection. And you know you and I
are the same, Like I rarely ever have to pee, right,
it's rare, So I can go a long time if
things are normal. Yeah. No, I mean, if I'm drinking
a bunch of water, sure, But I'm saying anyway, point being,
I get home that night and I do one of
those self tests. Yes, piano little you can buy, Yeah,
you can buy. And I'm like, and it says it's
positive for lukacytes, but it's negative for nitrites, which I
have to look it up. I ask you chat GPT
and it says, well, this means you could have a UTI,
but it also means you could just have some like inflammation.
Now in my mind, did I kind of know I
had a UTI? Yes? Yes, yeah, But I was also
a little bit in denial because I'm like, tomorrow I
have to be at this fucking competition even longer. The
second day has the awards ceremonies, it has the finals.
It was going to be a twelve hour day, oh
my god. And the time changed, I know, so we
lost an hour. So I was like, I got to
get up. I have to leave the house at seven thirty,
which is really six thirty. So I'm basically getting up
at six am after I was tired from the night before.
So I'm like, well, I can't go to urgent care
on Sunday, right, I can't. So I'm like, okay, I
gotta drink a lot of water. I had some of
that stuff that you take for a bladder infection, yeah,
the asy So I took that the night before, and
then I took that on Sunday, and then I was like, okay,
like I think I I think I feel better. Yeah.
So then last night I was like, I told John,
I go, I think I have a UTI, but like
maybe not. Then I was having that slightly feverish feeling. Yeah,
like that's the worst, and I'm like, oh boy. So
then I thought, okay, I'm gonna get up in the
morning and I'm going to go to urgent care, yeah
before we record. But then I woke up in the
morning and I was like, I don't know, maybe it's better.
Maybe I'll just go record and then I'll go after
if I still need to. Yeah. But then my back
started hurting and below my rib bad. So then I
called Julie Case and I was like, hey, dude.
Speaker 2: I.
Speaker 1: I and now my back hurts and She's like, yeah,
you have a kidney infection and I was like, well
they fuck. It's so funny. Julie just texted me everything, Okay,
did they give you antibiotics? So I'm like all right.
So I texted you. I was like, what do you
now It's like noon, and I was like, what if
I just run to urgent care and you were like,
of course please. So I go to urgent Care. I'm like,
I think I have a kidney infection, but maybe I'm fine.
I don't know. I could be overreacting. And they tested
it and they're like, yeah, you had a kidney and
an infection. Well they can't. They said, they touched my
they've pounded on my thing and it hurt kidney and
my pee was They said, yeah, you have all kinds
of an infection. So they're like, either way, if you
had they said, if you had a bad kidney infection, though,
you would be like have a fever, you would be sick. Like, well,
you could have ended up that way. Well that's the thing.
They're like, you caught it early enough. It's probably not
a full on kidney infection right now. It's going that way,
so go get your antibiotics and take them. Yeah so
you did good. We're both on antibiotics. Yeah.
Speaker 2: My antibiotics makes me nauseous. Oh no, yeah, so I
have to like eat something and then I'm not. It
doesn't make me hung I haven't been hungry all week.
I have not had an appetite.
Speaker 1: You know. Well that's for probably a lot of reasons. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
So how are you feeling, like mentally are you You
said you don't feel you're like yourself. I don't feel
like myself. I feel very off. But do you feel
like off because you're sad?
Speaker 2: And I feel like it's that I feel like I'm grieving,
and maybe it has some of the antibiotics I feel.
But I don't have an app something with my appetite.
Maybe because of that.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I just I feel.
Speaker 2: I feel kind of empty, of course, like I'm just
going through the motions, you know. And but yesterday Suzanne
was it. Yes, No, Saturday, I went to Suzanne's house.
She lives so fucking far from me. Took me an
hour to get there on a Saturday. First city, right, Yes,
it took me like an hour.
Speaker 1: Brutal.
Speaker 2: It was brutal on a Saturday, and it was so windy.
We were going to go eat by the beach, but
it was way too wendy. So we went to the
Century City Mall by her house and you know, had
lunch there and walked around and got some errands, did
some errands, both of us got a lot of stuff done.
Speaker 1: Now, the Century City parking lot is one of the
worst parking lots of it was. And also they had
streets blocked off because they had the marathon. The next
next day was the next ending in Century City. Yes,
so all the streets.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was bad, but once we got in, we
got in, it was fine.
Speaker 1: But then you have to take like a hundred photographs
of where you're calling. Oh yeah, we did everything for
exactly the same Yeah, every floor, and there's like half floors.
It's like a split level house. So except for a
bunch of them, so you don't know, are you on
like four B four?
Speaker 2: We were four here one twelve is where we were. Yeah,
there was no parking, but it was fun. We had
a great day, you know, Stan and I don't really
hang out like that. And then I went back to
her house and hung out with her up outside with
her little dog, Frankie was her dog's name, played with
Frankie in the backyard and chilled and then took another
hour to get back home. But it was nice to
get out, you know. And then watched UFC fights with
Sonny on Saturday, and how's he doing. He's doing okay,
he's doing good. The kids they bounced back a little
fun they do. Yeah, yeah, you know, he's he's sad.
I mean, we went out for dinner, and we came
home and walked into the house and it was like
we both went you know, because when we walk in,
Phil is always like wagging that tail, you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and then everything reminds you because not even just
the hair, but like the time that you would feed
them exactly wake up in the morning and you're like,
oh right, oh, I know, my routine is gone.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And like I would sit in bed and eat
cheese its and feel guilty because he's not here with
me to share my cheese its.
Speaker 1: So I didn't want to eat cheese its. I had
a couple and put them away. I'm sorry, Yeah, I'll
be okay. I know, I know you're tough, but like
you've been through some stuff. The divorce was not easy. Well.
Speaker 2: And then I had like a concussion, Oh my god,
I know, which I still have a little lump in
the back of my head. I can feel it, and
that's still going on. But it's going it's going away, you.
Speaker 1: Know, Sadie. I think Sadie had a very mild concussion
a few weeks ago. She gave blood and she apparently
she's very low on iron, we found out afterward, but
she passed out for a second and she fell and
hit her head. She did. She didn't even come home though,
because she was like, I was okay, I was fine,
but then she started getting like really intense headaches, like
every day, and basically I learned from you. I was like, well,
it sounds like it's a mild concussion. There's nothing they're
going to really be able to do for you, but
it should it takes a while to go.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean I at the next day,
I was dizzy and stuff and I couldn't come in.
Speaker 1: But after that, I was like fine.
Speaker 2: And then I found all that bruising on the back
of my neck, right, Yeah, dude, we're a mess.
Speaker 1: I know, it's all bruised too. It's like what I mean,
I know. I went to the same urgent care for
my uti where I went literally two weeks ago for
my foot, right, and I was like I'm back, yeah,
and I showed him my foot. I was like, remember me,
I was here two weeks ago. It broke my foot,
isn't it. Doctor was like I don't really remember.
Speaker 2: But isn't it nice that they already have all your insurance?
You don't have to do that already they have everything
there on file. Yeah, that's happened when I went in
for my cold, my flu or whatever.
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh my god. When I went in and I
was texting this to you, but it's going to be
better to hear it in person. So there was like
this older couple and the guy was he had hurt
his eye, I guess, or the side of his face, huh,
but he just was like I'm gonna say they were
in their seventies, maybe like late seventies, but the guy
was being so dramatic about whatever his injury was. The
woman was like, can can they bring him back? And
they're like, of course, they're super bitchy. Yeah. So the
lady at the desk was like, we're going to bring
him back. We're going to bring him back like any minute.
And the guy's like oh oh. And there was one
other there's like another person waiting and they're like, can
you get them back, like right, and the lady is
just not having it behind the desk. She's like, we
will bring him back in a minute, any minute. But
it took so long. I texted you, Yeah, this guy's
got something that's going out of the space and they
are not bringing him back, and they just kept saying
it will be a minute. So then he's like getting
up and walking outside and just like, oh my god.
And I wanted to go like, maybe you should have
gone to the er, like if SIT's exact exactly, Yeah,
is this ship that bad? Does this ship have a
good day? Ask yourself? Why is this shit that bad
that you can't have yourself good day? So then so
then he gets taken back, and then the other people
get taken back, and then I get taken back, and
I'm in a room and I can literally just faintly here.
Speaker 2: Oh god, this guy, what happened to him? I don't
know him with the shoe or something.
Speaker 1: There's god. Oh. And then the wife was wearing a
top and I'm not proud of this, but because she
was like in her seventies, but she was wearing a
top that I literally have and it's kind of me.
It's from Macy's right, and I want I so badly
wanted to be like, oh my god, I have that
same top, but I was like, that really couldn't be
less appropriate, because I'm like, cause, what do I think
She's gonna go like, Oh my god, that's so funny. Yeah,
I get out of Macy's. She's walking her husband around,
who's crying right one eye husband? No, I had some
boundaries and I just had it. It was an inside thought. Right,
Are you proud of me? Yes?
Speaker 2: I am.
Speaker 1: I love that you had the same top as her.
That's not funny. Yeah, it's weird, and it's it's funny
enough because it's a top that I bought and I
don't like and I've never worn. Oh my gosh, all right,
let me say let's say let's save some stuff for
like Friday show, but let's say hi to our friends.
We got, Oh Katie with a lot of ease. Katie's
rolling on e. Yeah, Katie Murphy, Yeah, Hi Katie. Apparently
she had rejoined and I forgot I forgot to add
her to our us, so we've been forgetting about her.
Oh sorry, Katie rolling on E. Kelsey is between two ferns,
and CHRISTI get the strap, and Stephanie's a shtinker wrinker,
and Sandra it's not easy being green, and Aaron's a
dirty Sanchez and Leslie coughin like don like Lyne. Yeah,
I'm with you, girl.
Speaker 2: Alicia Escalante from the city of Almonte City, where we're
going to be Kelly Branch, she's your aunt.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Rebecca was so cute. Sheybody wants to come judge
in Union City on April seventeenth. Ah yeah, and let's
see Sean vosh Ooh that baby Gabby and Missy they're
out there outside by the urgent care where I saw him.
Hey did you see him?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 1: They were like, oh outside moaning yup.
Speaker 2: Katerina, check check all our Valerie hits it out of
the park, Polly, We love your pancakes, Rita, we love
your kids. Rocking that Bassayette with Elizabethimson kids in it,
Nikki call your girls, and Dick is frolicking and Hayley
Pettis is a licensed marriage and family therapist. She's in Seattle,
but she can see clients across Washington State and she
likes to help high achieving women who feel confident in
every area of life except their love life. So go
to Emerald Bloomtherapy dot com. Also Custom Everyday Shop partners
with you to create the perfect personalized touch at a
price that feels right. It's a it's one of our friends.
Speaker 1: They do keepsakes and really cool stuff, so check them
out at Custom every day shop dot ets dot com.
The Family Skeptical. Are you not religious? Yeah, then listen
to this podcast. Listen to them, yeah, or just listen
to it because they are people that Yeah, are the
French who subscribe Family Skeptical. Go to medium dot com
and subscribe to the at unbecoming stories. And here's some
great stories. If you want to buy a car, why
not take all the pain out of it. So my
friend Julie, not Julie casem well, Julie casm too, got
your daughter a car from Adam. But my friend Julie,
who I drove to speech and debate with, also just
got a car from Aldams. Oh really, so my best
experience in my life.
Speaker 2: He helped Mike Gerstein and Phoenix. I mean he just
he's so great to deal with. Yeah, and he will
just whatever you want. He'll just be like, Okay, what
price are you at? What price point, Kelly, try to
get you a better anyway. He's really great. So Adam's
got a car dot com. Jacob Crowley is giving it
to the ace cl You couldn't need.
Speaker 1: The ACL's right now, thank you, Jacob. Please. Yeah. Christine
Black is with Waves and Wonder Travel. So you can
check her out. Her Facebook is Christine Concierge. Travel Planner
can use her Maren has a shop called Sugar Skull
and it's on the island of Kawai. They do wedding cakes.
They're a small bakery at a gift shop and if
you're not in Kawai then why not check out their
website Sugar Skull eight oh eight dot square dot site.
As always basic becky girl. Yeah, she has so many
cute t shirts that are on her website. You need
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you can use the code f col get fifty percent
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or Palm Desert, check them out. Best brunch in town. Yep, lovely.
All right, thanks everybody you left. Don't f it up.