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Speaker 1: You guys, you guys, welcome back. Did you get yourself

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saying that you guys, you guys, welcome back to this

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episode of Talkin' Schmidt. It's me Mother. Hello, Hello, I've

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missed you, besties. What is going on? Before I dive

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into the episode, I want to let you guys know

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about some upcoming shows I have January seventh. I'm in Portland, Oregon,

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January eighth, Seattle, Washington, January twenty seventh, Rallied, North Carolina,

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January twenty eighth, Austin, February thirteenth and fourteenth, Jansville, Wisconsin,

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March thirtieth, London March thirty first, Berlin, March twenty second, Amsterdam.

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I am so excited to get back on the road.

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I'm releasing a new special by the time this episode's out,

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it'll be out. It's called Sorry Dad. You can get

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it on my YouTube. And I'm so excited to be

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working on my new hour and see you guys out

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on the road. How are you, guys? I missed you.

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I feel like episode I kind of just you know,

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I had Santino on and we just kind of blew

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past the fact that I'm moving out of La we

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didn't really give it any proper attention. So I want

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to talk to you guys about that this episode. Uh,

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mister Manhattan and I are moving to Palm Beach, Florida.

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He is putting me in a fucking home. He is

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retiring my ass. Uh No, we're moving to Florida. He's

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opening a bagel shop there. It's called two and two Bagel. Bagel.

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I can't say bagel.

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Speaker 2: It's like Bagel's Wisconsin of.

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Speaker 1: You, Bagel, Bagel two one two bag He's like it's

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a literal fucking hate crime against his company that I

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don't know how to say bagel to bagel, Bagel, Okay,

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two one two bagel co. So anyway, he's opening a

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bagel company. I said it wrong again, bagel company. Fuck.

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Fuck fuck. This is not gonna go well. And I'm

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going to be spending all of twenty twenty six learning

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how to say bagel. Uh. So, yeah, we're moving. We're

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moving to Palm Beach. I'm so excited, you guys. I've

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lived in LA for nearly fifteen years. I love it here.

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It is the only place I've really ever felt at home.

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It took a very short amount of time between me

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moving out of Wisconsin and into La before. I felt

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like when I got on a plane to come back

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to La, La was home. La was a place that

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when I was ten, my mom took me to Disneyland

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and I saw palm trees in the sunshine and the

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people in the ocean and the vibes, and I was like,

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Oh my god, people live like this. This is so

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special and incredible. And my goal in life was always

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just to live in La. My goal was never to

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be a comedian. My goal was I never really had

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career goals. It was just La was the goal. And

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then I got here and I had a really great,

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big life and I'm so grateful for everything that I've

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done here. You know. I had a big career in advertising,

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and I started comedy here, and I you know, bought

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my first house here, and I lost my first lost,

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and I got married for the first time, and I

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got divorced for the first time. I listen, a lot

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of my life has happened here. I got Biggie Small's

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the dog here and I've had him for twelve years

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and I left him so much. He's coming with me

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to Palm Beach. The co parenting will commence in January.

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My ex husband got a new dog already, and Biggie

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is coming with me to Florida, and he's probably gonna

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come on the road with me a lot, because mister

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Manhattan is gonna be busy making bagels for Palm Beach

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and he is not going to have time to help

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take care of a doggie. And plus, I don't know

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big he's getting older, and I just every time I

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leave him, I get so deeply sad because I'm just like,

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I don't want to leave him. I don't want to

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miss any part of his life. Like I don't know.

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He's just so sweet and wonderful and if you ever

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meet him, you're so lucky. You know. Is he a

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perfect dog? No, but he's prey good. I'm talking like this.

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He's on my lap and I just want him to

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hear how much I love him. He's in a guccie

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hoodie because it's getting cold out. But anyway, yeah, I'm moving,

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and I you know, I it's very bittersweet for me.

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And you know, I drive around and I look at

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the foliage and the greenery and the city. It's a

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city that I love so much, and there's so much here.

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That's wonderful, but you know, for the past few years

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I've felt pretty untethered living in LA. I would say

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probably post divorce, you know, after I lost the house

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and just didn't have the stability of the marriage anymore.

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And you know, I'm on the road all the time

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as a touring comedian, so I come back and you know,

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my friend's circle has shrunk here and it feels like

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there's less for me here, and I don't want to

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base my life around a city anymore, especially when I

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met a partner that I'm really excited about, and I'm

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really excited to start a life with him, and I

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think we just want to do that. You know, there

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was a world where I waited and I waited out

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my tour and then I moved to Palm Beach. But

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you know, I don't like doing long distance. It's been

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really challenging for me. And when he and I are together,

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it's really easy. And we've co existed together enough. You know,

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I've spent two weeks in New York, he spent two

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weeks in LA. We've had enough solo time together living

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in each other's space to know that when we co

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exist together we're gonna be good. And listen. I know

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that I might have got behind a mic less than

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a year ago and said I'll never fucking live with

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a man again, and I did. I say things all

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the time and I really mean them, and then I change.

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And I think that is the beauty of being human,

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is that we have permission to change. And I changed

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my mind. And I'm going to move to Florida with

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my Mayan, and I'm really excited. I'm excited to build

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a home with him and to build a life with him.

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And I'm so excited for jaw renovations to come to

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our place out there. I am very sad to leave

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my place behind. It's, you know, so stunning, and I

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really have enjoyed living here, but like I said, I

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just feel emotionally untethered to this town. I haven't felt

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like you know, yeah, I do. I do spots and

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I and I work here, and Mike is here.

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Speaker 2: Mike I travel not well, We're cheap, I travel Mike.

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Speaker 1: I I'm heartbroken to be leaving Mike behind. I want

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to bring him with me to Palm Beach, but I

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can't afford that now. So whenever I can, I will

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I'll get him out there.

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Speaker 2: But yeah, bagel shop number two pops.

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Speaker 1: Off, Yeah, exactly, once we once the once the dough

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starts rolling in jokes like that, I know, jeez. Okay, anyway,

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so that's what's going on in my life. I feel

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really chaotic right now, if I'm being honest. I decided

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to make December the busiest month of my year, which

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is crazy because this is the month where most people

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wind down. But I, you know, launched the pod, which

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I you know, have saw some of your comments, and

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I'm so excited to have you guys all here with me,

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and your love does really truly mean the world to me.

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Like I said, I knew this was going to be

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a smaller party than the one we were at before,

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but I'm happy for those of you who showed up

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this time. And if you don't like it, I'm sorry

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that I'm not your cup of tea. Solo, I totally

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get it. It's a different vibe when I'm you know,

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talking into the ether, and it might feel a little

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chaotic or disjointed, because you know, first times are weird,

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and this is my first time doing a solo podcast,

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and it's a little weird talking to yourself. It's a

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little bit of a mental illness, a little bit of

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a net. You can diagnose it somewhere on the DSM

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for sure. So yeah, I launch a podcast. I'm launched

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as special and I'm moving out of the state, across

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the country to a brand new place where I don't

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really know anyone, and I'm excited. I'm excited for what

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lies ahead. Although you know, listen all the stereotypes about Florida,

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A little scared about those. We'll see, We'll see what

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it's like. I don't, I don't really know. I've been

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to Miami a bunch. I love Miami. I I'm moving

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for love, Guys, I don't. I don't. I don't know

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what else to say. That's the truth, you know. The

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reality of my job is I can do it from anywhere.

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I can podcast from anywhere, and I can travel to

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my stand up gigs from anywhere. So I am going

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to do that and it's going to be chaotic and crazy,

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and Mama's going to be stressed for the next couple

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of weeks. But the good news is there is no

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good news.

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Speaker 3: No.

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Speaker 1: The good news is. The good news is there's absolutely

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no good news. So now I'm I'm happy, I'm excited.

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I'm ready for a change of pace. I'm ready for

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a slower life. I've been saying that for a while.

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LA is still a fast life, even though it's a

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slow life. In terms of a city, it doesn't feel

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like New York.

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Speaker 4: I was.

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Speaker 1: It was in the cards for a little while. Mister

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Manhattan and I were talking about him getting a place

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in Palm Beach and then USh sharing a place in

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New York so that I could go do comedy and

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do shows. And then, you know, when we realized the

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reality of him, like I fully wrapped my head around

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the fact I was moving to New York. I went

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there and I was trying to enjoy it. But that

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city greats on me. There's so much energy, there's so

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much noise pollution, there's constantly a siren, there's constantly interference

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from someone walking directly at you. It's a really I

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think it truly is a city for young people. And

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I'm not saying that I'm not young, because I'm a

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young baby girl, but I'm just saying like young, like

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twenty somethings, like when I was on you know, coke

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and fucking partying that would have been my city, but

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that's not my life anymore. I think it would have

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been a really tough place for me to relax in.

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Like even mister Manhattan now because he's got rid of

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his place there and when he goes back, he's like, WHOA,

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this is really jarring, and he grew up there, like

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he's been there his whole life. New York is it's

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a different city. It's for a different breed, and I'm

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not that breed, you know. It's for a tough, tough motherfucker.

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And I'm like a little too sensitive, and I meditate

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too much to not be affected by the noise and

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the chaos and the commotion and everything that's going on.

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And it is a city full of hustlers and there's

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a ton of energy, and there's a lot of great

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social life and food and wonderful things about New York.

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But I think for me, ultimately, Florida feels a lot

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more aligned with what I like to do and how

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I like to feel. And I'm excited for the sunshine

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and like the warm winters and boat rides and just

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kind of enjoying my life a little more. And I am,

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like I said, excited to build a life with mister Manhattan.

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So that is the tea you guys. I'm sorry that

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I just blew past it on the last episode, but

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Santino was on a roll and you know, I wanted

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to let them cook. So that's what's going on with me.

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I will be moving, don't worry. The podcast won't be

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taking a break. I'm going to be banking some episodes,

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so you guys are fully fed while Mama is moving.

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But yeah, there's some big changes going on in my

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life and everything I do, I'm kind of enjoying it

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like this might be the last time I do it.

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You know. I'm doing my little night walks down Rodeo,

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which I love because you know Rodeo during the day.

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I've talked about it before. I don't like it. I

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think it's hectic. I think that there's a lot of

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dark energy there, and I think there's a lot of

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people that are, you know, selling themselves in their bodies

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for purses and bags, and there's a lot of people thinking,

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if I buy this bag, I'm going to feel like

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I belong in Da Da Da Da da Da. Like

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there's a lot of really dark energy there. But at

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night it's just a bunch of really pretty stores. I'll

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lit up and I like to go walk down it.

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I actually did see something recently that said seventy five

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percent of luxury spending comes from the middle and lower class,

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which is crazy. I just think that's a crazy statistic,

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and I think that kind of reinforces something that I've

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said before, which is that our people are kind of

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spending outside of their means to get things that make

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them feel like, maybe for two minutes, that they're that

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they made it, or that they belong to, you know,

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a higher tier of individuals. I've gotten to a point

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in my personal journey and I'm not a fashionista, so like,

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I don't take any fashion advice for me or any

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advice for me ever at all, because I'm not anybody's

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I shouldn't be anybody's hero. But I've gotten to a

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place where brands have started to give me the ick,

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like to like people that wear brands a lot, I'm like,

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what are you trying to prove? And too who? And

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like I understand there are people who genuinely love fashion,

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and those brands elevate their wardrobes and they know what

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they're doing. But I think brands for the sake of

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brands have really given me the ick. Also the amount

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of like fake shit that's that's clearly everywhere. I don't know.

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I think it's it's a more of a psychological thing

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for me. I'm like, what are you trying to prove

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and to who by wearing this thing? And listen, I

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have one purse that I love and it has a

255
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big ghost why I sell like bronze logo on it

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and I won't get rid of it because I love

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this bag. It's the bag I got for myself after

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I got divorced. I think it's beautiful. I think it's

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doning whatever. So I'm talking out of both sides of

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my mouth right now. But I just I think I've

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gotten to a point where I see brands and I go,

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I don't like I don't like it. I don't like it.

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What are we doing? Why are we doing it? And

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then like when all the studies come out about not studies,

265
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all the facts come out about And this was really

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illuminated when Trump slapped tariffs on everything and all of

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the Chinese manufacturers were like, here, we'll sell you the

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ship for what you know the stores are paying for it,

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and it's like, you're paying five thousand dollars for a

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bag that cost twelve is just kind of dumb. But anyway,

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to each their own. If you love a gooch, if

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you love a praduct, if you love a YSL, you go, girl, Like,

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I want to empower you to do what makes you happy.

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I think I'm just sharing where I'm at in my

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journey with that. But yeah, all that to say, like,

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every time I'm doing anything in La right now, I'm like,

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this might be the last time I do it. I

278
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took Biggie and a long walk down the boardwalk in

279
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Venice Beach the other day, and I'm like, this might

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be the last time you get to see, you know,

281
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a homeless guy on a unicycle with machete, Biggie, So

282
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take it in, Take it in because this is the

283
00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:10,360
good stuff, you know, this is what people pay the

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big bucks for. But no, I'm so excited to be

285
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on a beach again. I'm so excited to be on

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a warm beach. Biggie loves a beach. He sprints like

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a motherfucker down the sand. So I'm excited for my

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new life and a new chapter and everything that comes

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with it, and I'm excited to bring you guys along

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with me on the journey. And I, you know, I

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just I'm feeling good. I'm feeling good. I'm reading a

292
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lot again, which is making me happy. I noticed myself

293
00:14:35,720 --> 00:14:39,440
going down the brain rot of like the social media

294
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reels and tiktoks, and I was just like, oh, I

295
00:14:41,759 --> 00:14:44,159
can feel my brain falling out of my fucking ears.

296
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So I just started reading again. I started rereading and

297
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redoing The Artist's Way, which is a fantastic book and

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00:14:53,960 --> 00:14:56,399
guidebook for those of you who haven't ever used it

299
00:14:56,519 --> 00:14:59,039
or heard of it. The Artist's Way is basically something

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that gets creative out of their stuckness, like if you're

301
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feeling stuck or if you're feeling in a rut, it

302
00:15:04,039 --> 00:15:08,399
kind of breaks everything free. It's a nine week course,

303
00:15:08,600 --> 00:15:12,200
like each chapter. After each chapter there are little homework

304
00:15:12,200 --> 00:15:14,360
assignments and stuff you do with it to kind of

305
00:15:14,440 --> 00:15:17,279
free your creative self. Like one of them is taking

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yourself on an artist date, which is like going to

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the movie by yourself, turning your phone off, watching the movie,

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going to an art gallery, buying painting, something like just

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doing stuff that makes you happy and kind of working

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with your inner child and your inner creator. I think

311
00:15:32,600 --> 00:15:34,399
it's so easy for all of us to get kind

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of stuck in our ways of you know, of just

313
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like our routine. We wake up, we go to work.

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Some of you guys have kids, God bless you. It

315
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couldn't be me at this point in my life, for sure,

316
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but you know, you get so stuck in the routine

317
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of like, but for next year when I have a kid. Yeah, No, listen,

318
00:15:58,240 --> 00:15:59,559
Like I said, all I do is get on this

319
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mic and contredict myself. So I'm sure I'll probably be pregnant.

320
00:16:03,279 --> 00:16:04,519
No I want. I'm not gonna say that. I'm not

321
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gonna put that into the universe, but I'm sure listen,

322
00:16:07,039 --> 00:16:08,799
at some point I might have a kid, But right

323
00:16:09,080 --> 00:16:10,559
right now is not that point. All I was saying

324
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is that I admire people who do life and also

325
00:16:12,960 --> 00:16:16,000
have kids because I find doing life hard enough, you know.

326
00:16:17,799 --> 00:16:19,840
But anyway, all that to say, we get stuck in

327
00:16:20,039 --> 00:16:22,960
a mundane routine, and in order to kind of break

328
00:16:23,039 --> 00:16:26,240
out of it, this book is Mike, have you ever

329
00:16:26,279 --> 00:16:27,039
done the Artist's Way?

330
00:16:27,679 --> 00:16:30,240
Speaker 2: No, I live the artist's life. Go to movies alone,

331
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do all this shit by yourself.

332
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Speaker 1: All day okay, okay, Well, I mean I have done

333
00:16:35,879 --> 00:16:38,399
the Artist's way a few times. And after I did

334
00:16:38,440 --> 00:16:40,559
it the first time I wrote a book, I wrote

335
00:16:40,600 --> 00:16:42,399
my book. After I did it the second time, I

336
00:16:42,440 --> 00:16:44,399
wrote my movie. And then I'll let you know what

337
00:16:44,440 --> 00:16:48,919
happens after this time, I'll kill myself. Da da da.

338
00:16:48,960 --> 00:16:53,120
And for I'm just kidding, But there was there was

339
00:16:53,159 --> 00:16:58,240
a chapter in this not a chapter, it's there's something

340
00:16:58,240 --> 00:16:59,919
in the book that really stood out to me that

341
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I want to bring to your guys' attention. And it says,

342
00:17:06,759 --> 00:17:08,920
this is all from the book. So this is from

343
00:17:08,920 --> 00:17:11,079
the artist's way. You guys can read it yourself. But

344
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I'm just pulling some things that resonated with me. The

345
00:17:14,079 --> 00:17:17,720
essential element in nurturing our creativity lies in nurturing ourselves.

346
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Through self nurturance, we nurture our interconnection with the Great Creator.

347
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Through this connection, our creativity will unfold. Paths will appear

348
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for us. We need to trust the Great Creator and

349
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move out in faith. Repeat. The Great Creator has gifted

350
00:17:30,799 --> 00:17:35,599
us with creativity. Our gift back. Wait. Our gift back

351
00:17:35,720 --> 00:17:38,519
is our use of it. Do not let friends squander

352
00:17:38,559 --> 00:17:40,759
your time. Be gentle, but firm, and hang tough. The

353
00:17:40,759 --> 00:17:42,799
best thing you can do for your friends is to

354
00:17:42,799 --> 00:17:45,119
be an example through your own recovery. Do not let

355
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their fears and second thoughts derail you. So this is

356
00:17:48,559 --> 00:17:51,960
talking about like when you're trying to be creative and

357
00:17:52,720 --> 00:17:56,640
friends or people in your life will kind of put

358
00:17:56,680 --> 00:18:00,759
their fears or their perception of being creative on you.

359
00:18:00,799 --> 00:18:02,240
They'll be like, oh, you can't be in you know,

360
00:18:02,279 --> 00:18:04,279
you can't make money by writing a book, you can't

361
00:18:04,319 --> 00:18:06,519
make money by doing da da da da da. You know,

362
00:18:06,559 --> 00:18:09,359
they'll they'll try and tell you, and I think ultimately

363
00:18:09,359 --> 00:18:12,160
it's an act of preservation and they're trying to you know.

364
00:18:12,799 --> 00:18:16,000
I think I think that they're trying to save you

365
00:18:16,039 --> 00:18:18,720
from yourself, to not feel embarrassed or a failure like

366
00:18:18,759 --> 00:18:21,000
a failure later. But I think a lot of us

367
00:18:21,039 --> 00:18:23,319
don't do what we're supposed to do because we're afraid.

368
00:18:23,680 --> 00:18:27,160
And I think, honestly, like, fuck fear. If there's something

369
00:18:27,160 --> 00:18:29,000
you want to do, I think you should do it.

370
00:18:29,119 --> 00:18:32,440
Life is really fucking short, and being creative the moments

371
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in my life when I've been genuinely creative have brought

372
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me the most joy. So I just want to encourage

373
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you guys to you know, if there's anything you want

374
00:18:40,119 --> 00:18:41,359
to do, if they're like when you were a kid,

375
00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:43,440
if you like to paint, or if you like to act,

376
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or if there's anything that you did until you know

377
00:18:46,559 --> 00:18:49,039
the adults told you like you need to grow up.

378
00:18:50,079 --> 00:18:51,839
I think we need to ungrow up. I think we

379
00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:53,519
all need to be kids again. I think we all

380
00:18:53,559 --> 00:18:55,599
need to play more. I think we all need to

381
00:18:55,599 --> 00:18:57,960
take care of ourselves a little better because I think,

382
00:18:58,079 --> 00:19:01,160
you know, the world is tough and it's grading, and

383
00:19:01,279 --> 00:19:03,200
I think there are a few things that can kind

384
00:19:03,240 --> 00:19:06,400
of let the pressure out of the tire a little bit.

385
00:19:06,519 --> 00:19:09,880
And I think one of those things is being creative.

386
00:19:09,920 --> 00:19:11,839
So if any of you have ever wanted to go

387
00:19:11,880 --> 00:19:15,440
on this journey of being a creative in any capacity,

388
00:19:15,480 --> 00:19:17,559
I really encourage you to get the book The Artist's Way.

389
00:19:18,119 --> 00:19:21,480
It's really special. And then there's something in this book

390
00:19:21,559 --> 00:19:23,880
about crazy makers. And like I said, I've read this

391
00:19:24,000 --> 00:19:27,720
book three times before. This has resonated with me every

392
00:19:27,759 --> 00:19:31,640
single time i've read it, but this time especially so so.

393
00:19:31,759 --> 00:19:34,880
Crazy makers are those personalities that create storm centers. They

394
00:19:34,880 --> 00:19:39,839
are often charismatic, frequently charming, highly inventive, and powerfully persuasive

395
00:19:40,319 --> 00:19:42,799
and for a creative person in their vicinity, they are

396
00:19:42,920 --> 00:19:46,599
enormously destructive. You know the type. Charismatic but out of control,

397
00:19:46,640 --> 00:19:49,359
long on problems and short on solutions. Crazy makers are

398
00:19:49,359 --> 00:19:51,359
the kind of people who can take over your whole

399
00:19:51,400 --> 00:19:54,839
life to fix our uppers. They are irresistible, so much

400
00:19:54,920 --> 00:19:57,599
to change, so many distractions. If you are involved with

401
00:19:57,640 --> 00:20:02,160
a crazy maker, you probably already know it. So I

402
00:20:02,200 --> 00:20:07,200
have had a pattern of attracting crazy makers into my life,

403
00:20:07,200 --> 00:20:10,039
and I think this pattern stems from the og crazy

404
00:20:10,039 --> 00:20:12,960
maker that was my mom and I you know, I've

405
00:20:13,160 --> 00:20:16,119
I've talked about this at length before. This is not

406
00:20:16,200 --> 00:20:19,240
a surprise to anyone. My mom had borderline personality disorder.

407
00:20:19,319 --> 00:20:22,400
She was the definition of a crazy maker. Like she

408
00:20:22,559 --> 00:20:26,640
was the original gangster crazy maker. She never had a

409
00:20:26,720 --> 00:20:27,680
day of peace in her life.

410
00:20:27,799 --> 00:20:28,559
Speaker 4: She made one.

411
00:20:28,880 --> 00:20:29,960
Speaker 2: Huh, she made one.

412
00:20:30,319 --> 00:20:31,359
Speaker 1: She made a crazy maker.

413
00:20:31,680 --> 00:20:32,319
Speaker 2: She made you.

414
00:20:32,720 --> 00:20:34,119
Speaker 1: Yeah, you're saying I'm a crazy maker.

415
00:20:35,400 --> 00:20:37,720
Speaker 2: She made a crazy person because she's a crazy maker.

416
00:20:38,200 --> 00:20:42,480
It was a joke that flew. I missed. I missed everybody.

417
00:20:42,680 --> 00:20:46,440
Speaker 1: Okay, no, no, no, no, no, no, you were You're You're great.

418
00:20:46,599 --> 00:20:49,839
I'm I'm not firing on all cylinders today. I have

419
00:20:49,880 --> 00:20:51,920
a friend living with me right now who's going through

420
00:20:51,960 --> 00:20:54,440
a divorce, and she's wonderful and I love her. She

421
00:20:54,519 --> 00:20:57,400
has a big dog. But there's there's a lot going

422
00:20:57,440 --> 00:21:00,160
on in my apartment and my life, and so my

423
00:21:00,240 --> 00:21:03,720
brain is a little like fuzzy right now. So I'm

424
00:21:03,759 --> 00:21:07,319
sorry that I missed a joke. I will be better. No,

425
00:21:07,440 --> 00:21:09,480
but crazy makers, I've done this my whole life. I've

426
00:21:09,480 --> 00:21:12,640
always attracted crazy makers because of my mom. And I

427
00:21:12,680 --> 00:21:16,160
always wonder when I'm getting stuck in my professional life,

428
00:21:16,279 --> 00:21:19,880
especially creatively, I should be able to identify the pattern

429
00:21:19,920 --> 00:21:22,640
by now that creatively, when I'm getting nothing done, Like

430
00:21:22,680 --> 00:21:24,319
I'll look at a year and be like, why has

431
00:21:24,400 --> 00:21:27,759
nothing gotten done this year? It's like, oh, yeah, because

432
00:21:27,759 --> 00:21:30,559
I gave all of my attention to this, this situation

433
00:21:30,599 --> 00:21:33,920
outside of myself, you know. Like I had a friend,

434
00:21:34,160 --> 00:21:36,359
a really good friend in college for a long time

435
00:21:36,400 --> 00:21:43,039
who was not borderline bipolar, actually bipolar and actually one

436
00:21:43,079 --> 00:21:44,799
of the craziest people I've ever met in my life.

437
00:21:44,839 --> 00:21:47,119
Like there was no stability within our friendship, and I

438
00:21:47,160 --> 00:21:51,119
was always trying to maintain some sort of like peace

439
00:21:51,240 --> 00:21:53,759
or like is this going to be predictable and trying

440
00:21:53,799 --> 00:21:56,440
to like maneuver my way through this. And I always

441
00:21:56,440 --> 00:21:59,279
felt like I was walking on eggshells. And I've had

442
00:21:59,279 --> 00:22:02,880
a few of those friendship since then, and I think,

443
00:22:03,279 --> 00:22:07,240
I think, I think we're out of I think we're

444
00:22:07,319 --> 00:22:12,519
out of that portion of my life. I hope. But yeah,

445
00:22:12,559 --> 00:22:15,119
it's just something to be cognizant of and aware of.

446
00:22:15,160 --> 00:22:16,960
Like people can come into your life and kind of

447
00:22:17,039 --> 00:22:19,440
hijack your energy and then you no longer belong to

448
00:22:19,440 --> 00:22:22,200
yourself because you belong to the crazy storm that they're creating.

449
00:22:23,319 --> 00:22:27,799
And I've done this a lot. This is my fault.

450
00:22:27,799 --> 00:22:29,640
I think maybe it's a way to keep myself from

451
00:22:29,640 --> 00:22:31,920
myself and like my highest potential. I think it's a

452
00:22:31,920 --> 00:22:35,720
self sabotaging habit that I have. But I look forward

453
00:22:35,720 --> 00:22:39,039
to not having that habit anymore and to not welcoming

454
00:22:39,160 --> 00:22:47,640
anymore crazy makers into my life. So I just feel

455
00:22:48,000 --> 00:22:50,160
I don't know, I feel good, I feel excited. I

456
00:22:50,160 --> 00:22:53,599
don't know exactly what's coming up. I think my whole life.

457
00:22:53,640 --> 00:22:56,279
You know, there isn't a ton of stability in my life,

458
00:22:56,319 --> 00:22:59,200
like not with my career. It's nice to have feel

459
00:22:59,200 --> 00:23:03,240
grounded again and partnership. I don't know what's on on

460
00:23:03,640 --> 00:23:05,960
the horizon for me, and I think that's kind of exciting.

461
00:23:06,079 --> 00:23:08,440
I just am going to keep creating and putting stuff

462
00:23:08,440 --> 00:23:10,400
out and seeing, you know, throwing shit at the wall

463
00:23:10,400 --> 00:23:19,559
and seeing what sticks. I hang on pause for water.

464
00:23:19,759 --> 00:23:21,519
I have a dry throat from my babe.

465
00:23:22,799 --> 00:23:25,640
Speaker 2: It's fine. I've been restraining from seeing I'm walking on

466
00:23:25,759 --> 00:23:26,599
egg shells?

467
00:23:26,880 --> 00:23:30,960
Speaker 1: Who I'm walking on eggshell Also, that's another great book

468
00:23:30,960 --> 00:23:32,799
you guys should read. I tried to. I reached out

469
00:23:32,799 --> 00:23:36,400
to the author of Walking on Eggshells. She didn't get

470
00:23:36,440 --> 00:23:38,319
back to me. That's fine. I wanted to have her

471
00:23:38,319 --> 00:23:41,160
on the podcast. But I reread Walking on Eggshells recently,

472
00:23:41,200 --> 00:23:43,599
which is a book about dealing with people with borderline

473
00:23:43,599 --> 00:23:48,480
personality disorder and narcissistic personality disorder. It is a meaty,

474
00:23:48,559 --> 00:23:52,880
fucking book, and I really encourage you guys. If you've sorry,

475
00:23:52,880 --> 00:23:54,759
I keep him. I'm like telling you guys to read.

476
00:23:54,799 --> 00:23:58,440
I'm like, welcome to my podcast. Go read books like No,

477
00:23:58,519 --> 00:24:02,920
it's a really meaty book out borderline personality disorder, the

478
00:24:03,000 --> 00:24:07,240
traits of people with borderline personality disorder, narcissistic personality disorder,

479
00:24:07,640 --> 00:24:09,400
the traits of people with that and how they can

480
00:24:09,440 --> 00:24:12,160
overlap and what that looks like. And I remember the

481
00:24:12,200 --> 00:24:14,160
first time I read that book was the first time

482
00:24:14,200 --> 00:24:18,039
I felt like I wasn't alone because I had no words.

483
00:24:18,119 --> 00:24:21,960
I had no language to put to my relationship with

484
00:24:21,960 --> 00:24:25,039
my mom. No, I didn't understand what was going on.

485
00:24:25,559 --> 00:24:27,599
I was in I was her child, so I was

486
00:24:27,680 --> 00:24:30,920
in it. I didn't have the you know, the not

487
00:24:31,000 --> 00:24:34,720
the hindsight, but the I couldn't zoom out enough to

488
00:24:35,160 --> 00:24:37,440
look at things for like, Okay, this is what this

489
00:24:37,480 --> 00:24:41,440
person is doing, these are symptoms of this personality disorder.

490
00:24:41,440 --> 00:24:44,240
I didn't have that language until I've read this book.

491
00:24:44,400 --> 00:24:47,799
This book profoundly changed me. And if you guys are

492
00:24:47,799 --> 00:24:51,880
dealing with anyone with borderline personality disorder or narcissistic personality disorder,

493
00:24:52,119 --> 00:24:54,319
read this book. It will profoundly change you because it

494
00:24:54,359 --> 00:24:57,599
tells you basically what you can do to help these people.

495
00:24:57,640 --> 00:25:00,680
And when you have to protect yourself, step away and

496
00:25:01,160 --> 00:25:03,680
create boundaries. And I think it's really important to just

497
00:25:03,720 --> 00:25:07,000
not feel alone and feel a bit more empowered on

498
00:25:07,039 --> 00:25:11,359
your journey. And you know, dealing with these personalities is

499
00:25:11,359 --> 00:25:13,200
the toughest thing I've ever had to do in my life.

500
00:25:13,279 --> 00:25:17,519
It's something I've done more than once. And yeah, I

501
00:25:17,759 --> 00:25:20,079
think that's a great book and if I can, you know,

502
00:25:20,119 --> 00:25:22,400
I might hunt down that author a little harder and

503
00:25:22,440 --> 00:25:24,519
try and get her on here. But if not, you

504
00:25:24,559 --> 00:25:28,359
guys should all go read it anyway. Okay, with that,

505
00:25:29,279 --> 00:25:31,680
we do have a guest on today's episode, But before

506
00:25:31,720 --> 00:25:34,000
we get into the guest, I am going to bring

507
00:25:34,039 --> 00:25:37,759
back badvice and confession corner, which is kind of a

508
00:25:37,799 --> 00:25:40,079
new part of badvice. Like, I want you, guys to

509
00:25:40,079 --> 00:25:43,119
be able to tell me the bad thing that you

510
00:25:43,160 --> 00:25:45,200
don't want to say out loud to your friends, to

511
00:25:45,240 --> 00:25:48,279
your family, to your therapist, say it to me and

512
00:25:50,000 --> 00:25:53,160
let me ruin your life. No, just kidding, No, I

513
00:25:53,160 --> 00:25:55,079
want you to be able to speak freely to me

514
00:25:55,119 --> 00:25:57,039
if you guys want advice on anything. And like I

515
00:25:57,079 --> 00:25:59,720
said a million times over, I am not a perfect

516
00:25:59,720 --> 00:26:02,759
person and I am not perfectly sober, I am not

517
00:26:03,200 --> 00:26:07,079
perfectly in a relationship, I am not perfectly anything. Ever.

518
00:26:07,160 --> 00:26:10,160
I will never be perfect and I'm never gonna pretend

519
00:26:10,160 --> 00:26:13,079
to be. That's the thing about me. All I know

520
00:26:13,319 --> 00:26:16,119
is that I know nothing at all, and all I

521
00:26:16,160 --> 00:26:18,400
can share is you know kind of what I've been

522
00:26:18,440 --> 00:26:21,160
through and my POV and things, So let's dive into

523
00:26:21,680 --> 00:26:26,799
bad ad vice. My best friend is pregnant. I hate

524
00:26:26,880 --> 00:26:30,799
her husband. He's very controlling and not fun or nice

525
00:26:30,880 --> 00:26:33,559
or anything redeeming. Really, I feel horrible, but I wish

526
00:26:33,599 --> 00:26:35,720
she wasn't having this baby. I feel like I lost

527
00:26:35,759 --> 00:26:37,680
her to him, and now I will fully lose her

528
00:26:37,680 --> 00:26:41,119
to the baby. Any advice on how to navigate this.

529
00:26:43,880 --> 00:26:46,960
You gotta have a mental funeral for her every time.

530
00:26:47,480 --> 00:26:50,079
Every time one of my friends gets pregnant. I'm just like,

531
00:26:50,240 --> 00:26:54,880
rest in peace, rest in peace. No, but like, truly,

532
00:26:55,400 --> 00:26:59,720
I think it's normal to mourn a time in your

533
00:26:59,759 --> 00:27:03,799
life when you guys both had lives that were more

534
00:27:03,880 --> 00:27:06,920
similar than not, you know, and there's always going to

535
00:27:06,920 --> 00:27:10,920
be a time when that road forks and one of

536
00:27:10,920 --> 00:27:13,599
you goes one way and one of you goes another way,

537
00:27:13,799 --> 00:27:18,119
and it's heartbreaking, but it is really just the reality

538
00:27:18,160 --> 00:27:20,920
of growing up is that people are going to continue

539
00:27:20,960 --> 00:27:22,839
to change and grow, and you have to give them

540
00:27:22,880 --> 00:27:25,240
space to do so. The other thing, you hate her husband.

541
00:27:25,279 --> 00:27:28,039
That fucking sucks, Like I have been there before where

542
00:27:28,039 --> 00:27:31,079
and I don't like a partner's husband or or I

543
00:27:31,079 --> 00:27:34,519
don't like a best friend. Let me rephrase that. I

544
00:27:34,519 --> 00:27:37,440
have been there before where I don't like a friend's partner.

545
00:27:37,559 --> 00:27:40,880
But you just have to kind of just shut your

546
00:27:40,920 --> 00:27:43,839
mouth and let them make their decisions and respect them

547
00:27:43,960 --> 00:27:47,079
enough as a person to know that they're doing what

548
00:27:47,119 --> 00:27:50,400
they think is truly best for them. And if they're

549
00:27:50,519 --> 00:27:53,519
not willing to see that it's not, or if maybe

550
00:27:53,519 --> 00:27:55,680
they don't truly in their bones don't believe that it's

551
00:27:55,680 --> 00:27:57,920
not what's best for them, you just have to let

552
00:27:57,960 --> 00:28:01,559
people live their lives and make their mistakes and get

553
00:28:01,599 --> 00:28:05,119
through their first marriage. You know, you got to just

554
00:28:05,200 --> 00:28:07,839
like let people fuck up. And it's so hard when

555
00:28:07,839 --> 00:28:11,559
you love someone so much to just let them kind

556
00:28:11,599 --> 00:28:13,599
of walk into the fire because you want to save

557
00:28:13,640 --> 00:28:15,759
them from it because that's your best friend, that's your

558
00:28:15,839 --> 00:28:19,640
home me, and you don't want them to make those mistakes.

559
00:28:19,640 --> 00:28:21,599
But you have to let them make those mistakes. You know,

560
00:28:21,640 --> 00:28:23,640
you have to let people pick the wrong partner. You

561
00:28:23,799 --> 00:28:26,279
gotta just let people do what they're gonna do. And

562
00:28:26,319 --> 00:28:29,359
then babies are tough because like that is like on

563
00:28:29,480 --> 00:28:32,680
every single level, their life is about to change. Their

564
00:28:32,680 --> 00:28:36,240
priorities are going to shift. Like everything is going to

565
00:28:36,279 --> 00:28:38,279
be different from them, and your friendship is going to

566
00:28:38,359 --> 00:28:41,079
be like if it was number two on the list before,

567
00:28:41,200 --> 00:28:44,119
it's gonna be twenty. Like it's not even fucking close.

568
00:28:44,200 --> 00:28:46,079
And that's why I say, like I'm joking, but I'm

569
00:28:46,119 --> 00:28:48,559
not joking, like mental funerals for my friends with kids,

570
00:28:48,599 --> 00:28:52,240
Like when my friends like I got pregnant, I'm like, congratulations,

571
00:28:52,240 --> 00:28:54,319
I am so happy for you if that's what you wanted.

572
00:28:54,559 --> 00:28:57,240
Or do you want me to drive you to the clinic?

573
00:28:57,359 --> 00:28:58,920
You know, what do we do when you're what's the

574
00:28:59,119 --> 00:29:00,720
I'm a little too old now for anyone to want

575
00:29:00,720 --> 00:29:01,960
to go to the clinic. They're like, you know, we

576
00:29:02,000 --> 00:29:06,720
were trying, and I'm like, ah, that's scary, spooky, but no,

577
00:29:06,920 --> 00:29:09,079
I think you gotta just let people go. You gotta

578
00:29:09,160 --> 00:29:11,960
you gotta let people live their lives and trust that

579
00:29:12,000 --> 00:29:13,759
they will come back to you when the time is right.

580
00:29:13,960 --> 00:29:17,960
And you know, it's okay to mourn. Uh, It's okay

581
00:29:18,000 --> 00:29:20,119
to mourn the piece of you that's losing your best friend,

582
00:29:20,160 --> 00:29:24,279
because it's you're not losing them. They're not, you know, dying.

583
00:29:24,359 --> 00:29:26,240
Even when they do die, you don't lose them. They're

584
00:29:26,279 --> 00:29:30,200
still fucking here. But no, you're not really losing or

585
00:29:30,359 --> 00:29:32,359
I think you might be losing a part of yourself.

586
00:29:33,559 --> 00:29:37,599
And it's hard. It's it's hard to watch friends kind

587
00:29:37,599 --> 00:29:40,720
of pivot, and especially pivot into a direction where you

588
00:29:40,759 --> 00:29:42,440
don't feel welcome and you don't want to hang out

589
00:29:42,480 --> 00:29:45,119
with their partner and now there's a kid, and yeah,

590
00:29:45,160 --> 00:29:46,920
it's kind of a fucking mess, but like, it's a

591
00:29:46,920 --> 00:29:50,839
mess you can get through and and uh, and I

592
00:29:50,920 --> 00:29:53,759
believe in you, and I'm sorry. I'm sorry because I've

593
00:29:53,839 --> 00:29:55,720
been through this before where I'm like, ah, another one

594
00:29:55,759 --> 00:29:58,519
bites the dust, and another one goes, and another one

595
00:29:58,559 --> 00:30:04,720
goes and another one bites, Like when Yeah, but then again,

596
00:30:04,839 --> 00:30:07,920
like I, like Mike just said, vibe soon, no, not soon,

597
00:30:08,400 --> 00:30:10,960
Eventually I might have a kid and then I'll be

598
00:30:11,039 --> 00:30:12,839
that person going in that direction. So I think you

599
00:30:12,880 --> 00:30:15,000
got to just let people go on their own timelines

600
00:30:15,039 --> 00:30:20,279
into the fucking into Dante's seventh circle. Having kids does

601
00:30:20,319 --> 00:30:24,079
not seem fun, honestly, I just it doesn't seem fun.

602
00:30:24,119 --> 00:30:26,400
I don't think anyone's is anyone doing it because it's fun,

603
00:30:26,480 --> 00:30:28,599
maybe because it gives your life purpose.

604
00:30:28,319 --> 00:30:32,759
Speaker 2: But people who don't have fun people who don't have

605
00:30:32,839 --> 00:30:33,839
fun all dates.

606
00:30:34,119 --> 00:30:38,119
Speaker 1: Ye have kids, yeah, I you know, I do things

607
00:30:38,119 --> 00:30:40,039
and they're tough enough, and I'm like, I'd imagine if

608
00:30:40,039 --> 00:30:41,279
there's a fucking kid here.

609
00:30:41,759 --> 00:30:43,680
Speaker 2: Well there's an era of people who used to like

610
00:30:43,720 --> 00:30:45,039
have a kid to save a marriage.

611
00:30:45,519 --> 00:30:45,680
Speaker 1: Right.

612
00:30:45,799 --> 00:30:47,319
Speaker 2: Doesn't that sound like the worst?

613
00:30:47,559 --> 00:30:54,440
Speaker 1: That's the worst idea, that's the worst idea. Okay, numero dosse.

614
00:30:55,119 --> 00:31:00,160
I'm thirty six, Hey girl, Hey, still unmarried, struggling, dating,

615
00:31:00,200 --> 00:31:05,240
and ready to give up any advice, give up, give up.

616
00:31:05,559 --> 00:31:07,960
The second you give up is when he's gonna come.

617
00:31:08,359 --> 00:31:10,640
You know, I was like all last year, I was

618
00:31:10,680 --> 00:31:12,680
if you fucking heard me, I was keyking on here.

619
00:31:12,680 --> 00:31:15,039
I was like, I am intentionally dating, and I went

620
00:31:15,160 --> 00:31:19,759
up my partner and then I was like, fuck this,

621
00:31:19,759 --> 00:31:21,519
this fucking sucks. I'm gonna go to New York and

622
00:31:21,559 --> 00:31:23,000
I have a one night stand with a young guy

623
00:31:23,160 --> 00:31:25,319
and that's what I'm gonna do. And that's where I

624
00:31:25,359 --> 00:31:28,079
met my man. You really, I think there is an

625
00:31:28,240 --> 00:31:32,160
energy about wanting something too much and this sucks because

626
00:31:32,200 --> 00:31:34,680
it's like, this is our life. Of course we want partnership,

627
00:31:34,720 --> 00:31:37,119
of course, we want like, of course aren't we allowed

628
00:31:37,119 --> 00:31:40,160
to want things. But it's like the two times that

629
00:31:40,319 --> 00:31:45,039
I decided definitively I am done dating. I am not

630
00:31:45,160 --> 00:31:50,079
gonna do this. Literally the two times I met a

631
00:31:50,119 --> 00:31:52,920
long term partner after that, Like, I had a really

632
00:31:52,960 --> 00:31:55,279
bad breakup before I started dating Chris. I had a

633
00:31:55,319 --> 00:31:57,400
really bad breakup with this guy who, by the way,

634
00:31:57,839 --> 00:31:59,759
I knew the whole time I was in the relationship.

635
00:31:59,759 --> 00:32:02,279
I knew he was gay. I knew he was gay.

636
00:32:02,400 --> 00:32:05,480
He was doing he had a live in roommate that

637
00:32:05,599 --> 00:32:09,359
would like wear his clothes and never, I mean, they

638
00:32:09,359 --> 00:32:11,440
were always together, and I was just like, there's something

639
00:32:11,480 --> 00:32:13,920
going on here, but whatever. I was drunken on coke,

640
00:32:14,000 --> 00:32:16,039
so I didn't really fucking care. We were just partying.

641
00:32:16,559 --> 00:32:20,960
But I knew this man was gay, and he did

642
00:32:21,039 --> 00:32:24,559
some horrible thing to me. Oh I remember we were

643
00:32:24,559 --> 00:32:25,960
gonna go out, So I was like, oh, I ran

644
00:32:25,960 --> 00:32:28,359
to your apartment and I dropped biggie off, and he

645
00:32:28,599 --> 00:32:30,599
fucking lost his mind on me. He's like, you can't

646
00:32:30,640 --> 00:32:33,119
just drop biggie off in my apartment whenever you want to.

647
00:32:34,400 --> 00:32:36,880
You're like crossing a boundary. And then I was like, okay,

648
00:32:36,920 --> 00:32:38,400
are we still meeting up? And then I didn't hear

649
00:32:38,440 --> 00:32:40,440
from him for like two days, and then I was like, okay,

650
00:32:40,599 --> 00:32:42,400
well and then I just like dropped his shit off,

651
00:32:42,440 --> 00:32:44,400
and I was like, I'm done. I'm done dating this

652
00:32:44,480 --> 00:32:47,240
man's gay. I got to get the puckata here, and

653
00:32:47,319 --> 00:32:48,920
I'm gonna I was like, it's the Year of Brittany.

654
00:32:49,000 --> 00:32:51,039
I moved two blocks away from the Hollywood improv. I

655
00:32:51,039 --> 00:32:53,359
was like, I'm gonna go do comedy every single night.

656
00:32:53,400 --> 00:32:57,640
Literally two weeks later, Chris and I started dating. So yeah,

657
00:32:57,759 --> 00:33:00,559
listen every time I've made a decision. Oh and by

658
00:33:00,559 --> 00:33:03,119
the way, that guy, this is just like a little

659
00:33:03,240 --> 00:33:10,000
vindication moment. He just got caught soliciting male prostitution and

660
00:33:10,079 --> 00:33:13,000
doing coke and he had a big old job and

661
00:33:13,039 --> 00:33:16,160
he lost it. And he had a twenty four year

662
00:33:16,200 --> 00:33:19,319
old wife and a kid and he lost that, and

663
00:33:21,480 --> 00:33:23,920
just another episode of Karma doesn't miss a doorstep.

664
00:33:25,359 --> 00:33:25,839
Speaker 4: I knew.

665
00:33:26,359 --> 00:33:28,799
Speaker 1: I knew, and a bunch of people texted me about it.

666
00:33:28,839 --> 00:33:33,279
They're like, JUICYE this happened, and I was like, ha ha, bitch,

667
00:33:33,920 --> 00:33:37,480
ha ha. So anyway, no, I hear your frustration. I

668
00:33:37,519 --> 00:33:40,240
know thirty six can feel old, but it's young. Like

669
00:33:40,720 --> 00:33:42,920
I sometimes joke that I'm old. I sometimes joke that

670
00:33:42,960 --> 00:33:45,359
I'm young. I don't know how I feel always, but

671
00:33:45,440 --> 00:33:49,079
it's like you are still young and someone is coming. Also,

672
00:33:49,200 --> 00:33:51,480
where do you live? Are you in your hometown? Have

673
00:33:51,599 --> 00:33:53,920
you gone through the whole dating pool? Like I need

674
00:33:53,920 --> 00:33:57,960
more information to give you bad advice, and to give

675
00:33:57,960 --> 00:34:01,640
you the bad advice you're looking for. I get it.

676
00:34:01,640 --> 00:34:04,440
It's tough, like I I, like I said, I was

677
00:34:04,559 --> 00:34:07,160
ready for partnership, and I was like trying to call

678
00:34:07,240 --> 00:34:09,800
it in and I allowed some dating coach to tell

679
00:34:09,800 --> 00:34:12,960
me my profile was terrible and really hurt my feelings

680
00:34:12,960 --> 00:34:15,440
and like kind of was one kind of be a

681
00:34:15,480 --> 00:34:19,800
fucking cunt about it. But yeah, like I allowed, you know,

682
00:34:20,480 --> 00:34:22,559
I allowed myself to I was really trying to put

683
00:34:22,559 --> 00:34:25,119
myself out there. And when I finally was like fuck this,

684
00:34:25,719 --> 00:34:28,519
fuck all of this, I am actually going unhinged just

685
00:34:28,559 --> 00:34:31,400
to have a one night stand, my intention changed. And

686
00:34:31,440 --> 00:34:33,960
like my point there is that I think the universe

687
00:34:34,440 --> 00:34:37,320
can feel it. And it's like the law of attraction, right,

688
00:34:37,360 --> 00:34:39,800
when you go too close to something, it pulls away,

689
00:34:40,320 --> 00:34:43,639
And so I was doing that. My the vibes I

690
00:34:43,719 --> 00:34:45,760
was putting out were not the right vibes to attract

691
00:34:45,800 --> 00:34:48,199
what I was looking for. And then when I finally detached,

692
00:34:50,000 --> 00:34:55,079
you know, mister Manhattan came along and and yeah, it's

693
00:34:55,119 --> 00:34:57,559
like the second meaningful partnership I've ever had in my

694
00:34:57,719 --> 00:35:00,719
entire life. Well, I know, baky, I'm so it's the

695
00:35:00,800 --> 00:35:04,440
third year. The first. Chris was the second, mister Manhattan

696
00:35:04,599 --> 00:35:11,639
is the third. Anyway that Okay, so those two are

697
00:35:11,679 --> 00:35:14,760
bad byes. This one I need to talk about it

698
00:35:14,760 --> 00:35:18,440
because it's so fucking crazy. But I don't know how

699
00:35:18,480 --> 00:35:22,519
to call this down. This girl rode in and it's

700
00:35:22,559 --> 00:35:26,159
really long, So I'm gonna do my best year. I

701
00:35:26,199 --> 00:35:28,400
have a little tea for you. I'm freshly divorced. Actually,

702
00:35:28,480 --> 00:35:31,880
you know what, I'm gonna just recap this because it's

703
00:35:31,920 --> 00:35:34,920
really really long. Okay, So she's newly divorced. She found

704
00:35:34,920 --> 00:35:39,039
out her ex husband was cheating on her with a

705
00:35:39,159 --> 00:35:44,320
trans woman, and that incited some homophobia in her. She's like,

706
00:35:44,360 --> 00:35:46,400
I've never been homophobic before, but all of a sudden,

707
00:35:46,440 --> 00:35:49,360
I'm feeling things I've never felt before, and I don't

708
00:35:49,400 --> 00:35:51,199
know how to deal with these emotions. But it sounds

709
00:35:51,239 --> 00:35:53,920
like this man was just her husband. Her ex husband

710
00:35:54,000 --> 00:35:57,920
was gaslighting, He was sending her nudes to other people

711
00:35:57,960 --> 00:36:00,480
without her permission, he was asking her to go on

712
00:36:00,480 --> 00:36:03,599
only fans and to share her with other guys and

713
00:36:03,639 --> 00:36:05,920
like to do all this stuff that made her really uncomfortable.

714
00:36:06,239 --> 00:36:09,239
And then as an aside, she randomly also told me

715
00:36:09,320 --> 00:36:13,559
that he they had three dogs and two cats, and

716
00:36:13,599 --> 00:36:17,480
one of the dogs ate one of the cats, and

717
00:36:17,519 --> 00:36:20,360
then he was supposed to rehome the dog and instead

718
00:36:20,400 --> 00:36:26,280
of rehoming the dog, he shot the dog. And it

719
00:36:26,480 --> 00:36:28,639
was like, it's such a trauma dog.

720
00:36:28,800 --> 00:36:30,840
Speaker 2: Criminal. Huh pretty criminal?

721
00:36:31,159 --> 00:36:33,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's illegal. I don't know where she lives. She

722
00:36:33,519 --> 00:36:36,880
could be in the South or somewhere where that's not

723
00:36:37,360 --> 00:36:38,920
Is there anywhere that's not illegal?

724
00:36:40,119 --> 00:36:41,920
Speaker 2: I don't want to google it.

725
00:36:42,119 --> 00:36:45,039
Speaker 1: I don't. It's also like whatever, we don't even care

726
00:36:45,079 --> 00:36:46,960
that you're shooting loads in a trans guy's ass. You

727
00:36:47,000 --> 00:36:49,039
can't shoot a load and a dog like we can't.

728
00:36:49,119 --> 00:36:52,519
You can't unload a clip and a dog. It's fucking crazy,

729
00:36:52,840 --> 00:36:56,840
Like that's some that's that that made me like jump

730
00:36:57,119 --> 00:37:04,440
I I I do. This man's transgressions in terms of

731
00:37:04,760 --> 00:37:07,840
his sexuality in his marriage takes such a fucking back

732
00:37:07,960 --> 00:37:10,599
seat to what he did to the dog like this

733
00:37:10,760 --> 00:37:14,119
is a bad man. That is a bad fucking person,

734
00:37:14,239 --> 00:37:17,079
and listen, like there are extreme cases where dogs do

735
00:37:17,199 --> 00:37:19,639
need to be put down. When I was in my

736
00:37:19,679 --> 00:37:22,639
first marriage, we had a bloodhound that bit people, bit

737
00:37:22,760 --> 00:37:24,679
me in the face, bit another girl in the face,

738
00:37:24,679 --> 00:37:28,360
broke skin, bit my boss in the face, and literally

739
00:37:28,559 --> 00:37:30,760
her lip from right beneath her nose to the bottom

740
00:37:30,800 --> 00:37:32,639
of her lip was torn wide open. We had to

741
00:37:32,679 --> 00:37:36,480
call the ambulance. Any other person probably would have sued

742
00:37:36,519 --> 00:37:39,840
the fucking socks off of us, but that woman was

743
00:37:39,960 --> 00:37:43,480
so kind to not But we did have to put

744
00:37:43,480 --> 00:37:45,360
that dog down. But you put the dog down, you

745
00:37:45,400 --> 00:37:48,639
don't take the dog into the yard and shoot it

746
00:37:48,679 --> 00:37:53,039
like that is so inhumane and disgusting. And girl, I

747
00:37:53,039 --> 00:37:55,280
am just so sorry that you went through all of this.

748
00:37:55,519 --> 00:37:59,320
I haven't even addressed like the trans stuff, because like,

749
00:38:00,159 --> 00:38:02,920
I don't know how to, I don't have any advice.

750
00:38:02,960 --> 00:38:05,760
I have no idea how I would feel if my

751
00:38:05,880 --> 00:38:10,719
partner was cheating on me with men and trans women,

752
00:38:11,119 --> 00:38:16,159
and I don't. I just am sending you so much love.

753
00:38:16,760 --> 00:38:18,840
I feel so sad for you, but I also feel

754
00:38:18,840 --> 00:38:20,480
so happy for you that you got out of this

755
00:38:20,559 --> 00:38:22,559
situation because it sounds like you were married to a

756
00:38:22,599 --> 00:38:26,840
fucking dirt bag, and I'm just really happy that. I'm

757
00:38:26,840 --> 00:38:30,639
really happy that you got out because that's horrific and

758
00:38:31,360 --> 00:38:34,599
nobody should be going through what you're going through, yourself

759
00:38:34,599 --> 00:38:39,119
and your animals included. Okay, this episode, you guys, I'm

760
00:38:39,280 --> 00:38:42,280
so excited to have one of my dear friends, Frankie

761
00:38:42,360 --> 00:38:46,679
kem Yonez on the podcast. He is an actor and

762
00:38:47,000 --> 00:38:50,440
a comedian and just one of the funniest, loveliest people

763
00:38:50,440 --> 00:38:52,880
I've ever had the pleasure of knowing. Please enjoy this

764
00:38:53,000 --> 00:38:56,920
episode of Talking Schmidt. Oh my gosh, you guys, I'm

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766
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769
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770
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771
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777
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782
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826
00:41:57,239 --> 00:41:57,760
you know a.

827
00:41:57,760 --> 00:42:01,679
Speaker 4: Co you know, kind of like like salty vet like women.

828
00:42:02,000 --> 00:42:03,800
She was cool, like what's chubby?

829
00:42:04,480 --> 00:42:04,559
Speaker 3: Like?

830
00:42:04,639 --> 00:42:08,599
Speaker 4: You know, she was late, she looks like she had

831
00:42:08,599 --> 00:42:11,480
been through some things. Her hair was tattered, Ok, you know,

832
00:42:11,559 --> 00:42:15,159
but she was kind of you know, an Uber drive

833
00:42:15,199 --> 00:42:15,880
for extra ship.

834
00:42:17,000 --> 00:42:19,599
Speaker 1: Do you see now? Uber has you can request a

835
00:42:19,639 --> 00:42:23,480
woman driver really for women obviously, like if you don't,

836
00:42:23,480 --> 00:42:27,519
because so many women are getting abused by Uber drivers, yeah,

837
00:42:27,679 --> 00:42:31,440
or passengers Uber pass No Uber passengers are getting abused

838
00:42:31,480 --> 00:42:33,440
by Uber drivers. There's like a new thing going around

839
00:42:33,480 --> 00:42:35,800
where the Uber drivers are putting like drugs in the

840
00:42:35,840 --> 00:42:38,159
water and taking advantage of them. So Uber has a

841
00:42:38,159 --> 00:42:41,440
new thing now ship. Yeah, you can request a woman

842
00:42:41,599 --> 00:42:44,119
driver and then just getting a car accident instead.

843
00:42:47,719 --> 00:42:50,880
Speaker 4: Yeah, hear about. Yeah, Christmas decoration is getting taken out

844
00:42:50,880 --> 00:42:55,519
of story the big plans for today. Hey women, right.

845
00:42:58,639 --> 00:43:00,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a it's a different kind Yeah.

846
00:43:00,800 --> 00:43:02,719
Speaker 4: Yeah, dude, that's so funny. I didn't know they could

847
00:43:02,760 --> 00:43:04,840
do that. I always felt like, well, they have all

848
00:43:04,840 --> 00:43:07,159
your ship, Uber has all your information. So I was fools,

849
00:43:07,159 --> 00:43:10,320
act shady, you know, right, But but it's happening. I

850
00:43:10,360 --> 00:43:13,599
guess I have one homie though. He just looks like

851
00:43:13,679 --> 00:43:18,880
Johnny Depp and my homiest that hear me say this,

852
00:43:18,920 --> 00:43:20,440
they're going to know exactly what I'm talking about. Yeah,

853
00:43:20,480 --> 00:43:23,719
he's single, but he's he's kind of a nympho. Also,

854
00:43:23,719 --> 00:43:27,840
I won't say his name's I'm sure he's probably probably

855
00:43:27,840 --> 00:43:29,760
good at it. Yeah, but it looks like he's like,

856
00:43:30,000 --> 00:43:32,119
we'll go to like bars and like the last time

857
00:43:32,119 --> 00:43:33,440
I was with him, like, we're at this bar and

858
00:43:33,599 --> 00:43:35,079
one of the girls at worked there just walked up

859
00:43:35,079 --> 00:43:36,840
to him and slipped piece of paper like her number,

860
00:43:37,039 --> 00:43:39,079
Like I never see that happen. You know, and he's

861
00:43:39,079 --> 00:43:41,119
just and he's just all stone in the corner like

862
00:43:41,679 --> 00:43:47,000
you know, but he was uber driving and this, uh,

863
00:43:47,920 --> 00:43:50,320
I think it was a couple. Actually maybe it was.

864
00:43:50,519 --> 00:43:55,199
He's had sexual encounters of multiple passengers, just like they

865
00:43:55,239 --> 00:43:57,079
invite him in and then they end up sucking. And

866
00:43:57,079 --> 00:43:58,559
then there was one that was a couple and the

867
00:43:58,639 --> 00:44:01,000
dude was like was it when he just wanted to

868
00:44:01,000 --> 00:44:05,280
watch dude crazy homie like right there, like right when

869
00:44:05,280 --> 00:44:07,280
they gave the ride. It wasn't like hitting me up later.

870
00:44:08,719 --> 00:44:12,239
Speaker 1: Come in now. Yeah, that's a good gig for him.

871
00:44:12,440 --> 00:44:17,159
Speaker 4: Yeah, And then it was like, my my homie was

872
00:44:17,239 --> 00:44:19,039
like I told him, he's like, dude, I thought you

873
00:44:19,079 --> 00:44:21,639
were like because you know, he would hook a couple

874
00:44:21,639 --> 00:44:23,440
of like really hot chicks, but then also like just

875
00:44:23,519 --> 00:44:26,199
down for whatever and he had to three someone like

876
00:44:26,199 --> 00:44:29,159
these two like big homegirls and you respected it at

877
00:44:29,199 --> 00:44:31,559
the same time, like wow, you're like you know, you're

878
00:44:31,599 --> 00:44:34,599
willing to share it with whoever. And my homie was like,

879
00:44:34,639 --> 00:44:35,960
I thought you were like a player, but now I

880
00:44:36,000 --> 00:44:37,119
realize you're an infomania.

881
00:44:37,360 --> 00:44:42,239
Speaker 1: Yeah, this is diagnosable. Yeah, this is a little that's

882
00:44:42,320 --> 00:44:43,639
cool a little.

883
00:44:43,400 --> 00:44:45,079
Speaker 4: Bit, you know, it's also like all right, cool, Like

884
00:44:45,159 --> 00:44:46,800
you know, it's cool for those big homegirls.

885
00:44:46,880 --> 00:44:52,320
Speaker 1: Yeah, listen, big girls love too they do. What have

886
00:44:52,400 --> 00:44:54,800
you been up to me?

887
00:44:55,000 --> 00:44:57,800
Speaker 4: Just you know, I just got back from Montreal and

888
00:44:57,840 --> 00:45:00,679
then I know you're probably like what do you got?

889
00:45:00,679 --> 00:45:02,599
When I got that texture you You're like, fucking this

890
00:45:02,639 --> 00:45:05,360
motherfucker's probaking to cancel on me. He's like bought you off.

891
00:45:05,400 --> 00:45:07,920
And I was like, no, I'll be back, but what

892
00:45:07,960 --> 00:45:11,280
were you doing? I showed up thirty seven minutes later, it.

893
00:45:11,239 --> 00:45:14,800
Speaker 1: Was forty one minutes, Like, it's all right.

894
00:45:14,920 --> 00:45:17,320
Speaker 4: I was like, oh, you say dinner or whatever else?

895
00:45:17,360 --> 00:45:19,119
You take care of the homie right here or whatever.

896
00:45:21,559 --> 00:45:26,119
Speaker 1: You're good. You're running on brown time. I told my

897
00:45:26,280 --> 00:45:27,639
twelve thirty. I told you twelve.

898
00:45:28,199 --> 00:45:33,880
Speaker 4: Really no, I was like, fuck, dude, yeah, yeah, what's

899
00:45:33,920 --> 00:45:35,400
what was? But yeah? Was that?

900
00:45:35,480 --> 00:45:36,480
Speaker 1: What were you doing up there?

901
00:45:37,079 --> 00:45:40,679
Speaker 4: There's that show DMV. It's like a new show, so funny.

902
00:45:40,679 --> 00:45:43,679
It's the East Hollywood DMV, but they shoot in Montreal, Canada.

903
00:45:43,840 --> 00:45:46,159
Of course that's the name of the game.

904
00:45:46,480 --> 00:45:47,320
Speaker 1: That show got picked up.

905
00:45:47,960 --> 00:45:49,280
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, it's already airing.

906
00:45:49,360 --> 00:45:51,239
Speaker 1: It's like was it has it been going on?

907
00:45:51,599 --> 00:45:51,880
Speaker 4: Yeah?

908
00:45:52,199 --> 00:45:53,960
Speaker 1: I mean never mind. I thought this was a new show.

909
00:45:54,000 --> 00:45:56,960
Weren't you shooting a pilot for a new show? Uh?

910
00:45:57,559 --> 00:45:59,719
Speaker 4: No, that was in that didn't get picked up. Yeah

911
00:45:59,719 --> 00:46:01,920
that was and yeah that was the Native American Community

912
00:46:01,920 --> 00:46:04,000
Center in Oakland. That was shot in Portland.

913
00:46:04,199 --> 00:46:10,679
Speaker 1: Right, but you guys, Hollywood, is it real? I the burstrip?

914
00:46:11,159 --> 00:46:13,360
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's not what it used to be. It's all

915
00:46:13,360 --> 00:46:15,800
in Canada now, in Portland and Atlanta.

916
00:46:15,960 --> 00:46:18,880
Speaker 1: Yeah. You grew up in LA though, right, yeah?

917
00:46:18,920 --> 00:46:21,360
Speaker 4: And there, well, you know, I lived in in LA

918
00:46:21,440 --> 00:46:23,239
so I was like a you know, I was still

919
00:46:23,360 --> 00:46:26,400
pretty young. And then we moved to Ventura County and

920
00:46:26,440 --> 00:46:28,760
then I moved and then I lived in the Bay

921
00:46:29,280 --> 00:46:31,320
for like ten years. That's where I started doing stand

922
00:46:31,400 --> 00:46:35,679
up and I moved back to LA and uh twenty thirteen,

923
00:46:35,760 --> 00:46:37,920
I think, yeah, about twenty thirteen I moved back to.

924
00:46:38,119 --> 00:46:39,480
Speaker 1: I didn't realize you started in the Bay.

925
00:46:40,119 --> 00:46:43,519
Speaker 4: Yeah, I know. Everybody, So I was like everybody from

926
00:46:43,639 --> 00:46:46,559
LA was like, you know, I was like this the

927
00:46:46,679 --> 00:46:49,119
Mexican comic from the Bay. Yeah, but I was really

928
00:46:49,400 --> 00:46:52,079
from LA. But I started doing stand up up there.

929
00:46:52,400 --> 00:46:54,199
I was already living up there for like four or

930
00:46:54,199 --> 00:46:57,039
five years, and then I started hitting, hitting the open.

931
00:46:56,800 --> 00:47:01,039
Speaker 1: Mics and what means you get into comedy And what

932
00:47:01,079 --> 00:47:02,199
was the trauma that triggered?

933
00:47:02,400 --> 00:47:08,280
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah whatever, physical abuse, sexual abuse, yeah, you know.

934
00:47:08,440 --> 00:47:08,880
Speaker 1: You know it.

935
00:47:09,119 --> 00:47:12,280
Speaker 4: They went to the ring room. But uh yeah, my

936
00:47:12,280 --> 00:47:14,639
mom and dad were die hard stand up fans, you know,

937
00:47:14,960 --> 00:47:16,519
like when they were dating, they would go to the

938
00:47:16,639 --> 00:47:18,519
you know, comedy store, Lave Factory, Hollywood.

939
00:47:18,519 --> 00:47:20,000
Speaker 1: And did they come to your shows?

940
00:47:20,159 --> 00:47:20,480
Speaker 4: Yeah?

941
00:47:20,559 --> 00:47:22,719
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, Oh I bet they love that.

942
00:47:23,320 --> 00:47:23,960
Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, yeah.

943
00:47:24,000 --> 00:47:26,639
Speaker 1: My dad could give a funk about comedy you care

944
00:47:26,639 --> 00:47:29,800
at all? And then he watched his mind and he's like, really,

945
00:47:30,519 --> 00:47:31,280
he seems.

946
00:47:30,960 --> 00:47:32,800
Speaker 4: So supportive in the photos I see it.

947
00:47:33,079 --> 00:47:35,199
Speaker 1: He is, but he's like, you know, he's like, you know,

948
00:47:35,280 --> 00:47:37,000
I would think it was funny if I weren't your dad.

949
00:47:37,079 --> 00:47:38,519
Like he's like, I don't want to hear about an end.

950
00:47:40,360 --> 00:47:44,159
Speaker 4: Player, Like that's not because you go hard funny as

951
00:47:45,039 --> 00:47:52,400
Yeah I love that, Like yeah yeah yeah for a father. Yeah,

952
00:47:52,760 --> 00:47:54,000
I mean it's tough for my dad to see some

953
00:47:54,039 --> 00:47:54,360
of the ship.

954
00:47:54,400 --> 00:47:57,679
Speaker 1: I do too, so yeah.

955
00:47:55,840 --> 00:47:58,239
Speaker 4: Yeah, but he's like, all right, it's funny though, Yeah

956
00:47:58,280 --> 00:47:58,679
it is.

957
00:47:58,960 --> 00:48:02,079
Speaker 1: That's all that matters. This last special I named it, Sorry.

958
00:48:01,920 --> 00:48:03,920
Speaker 4: Dad, Oh that's right.

959
00:48:04,000 --> 00:48:07,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, and then he was there the whole time. I

960
00:48:07,039 --> 00:48:10,719
couldn't make contact with him. I was like, no, don't look,

961
00:48:09,400 --> 00:48:13,119
so I can't do it.

962
00:48:13,480 --> 00:48:15,039
Speaker 4: Did you did you get any shots at him in

963
00:48:15,079 --> 00:48:15,519
the audience?

964
00:48:15,599 --> 00:48:17,559
Speaker 1: Yeah, So we actually had a dad cam on him.

965
00:48:18,559 --> 00:48:23,519
So while he's I'm like talking about giving people chemydia,

966
00:48:23,599 --> 00:48:27,719
He's like, yeah, he's just sitting.

967
00:48:27,480 --> 00:48:30,239
Speaker 4: There like that's my daughter, my princess.

968
00:48:30,400 --> 00:48:33,159
Speaker 1: Yeah, common street trash.

969
00:48:35,039 --> 00:48:39,199
Speaker 4: Hell yeah, I love it. That's my baby. I'm so

970
00:48:39,320 --> 00:48:39,880
proud of her.

971
00:48:47,239 --> 00:48:50,559
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I love you. Thank you for being here.

972
00:48:50,679 --> 00:48:52,400
Speaker 4: Nah, you know I love you too.

973
00:48:52,559 --> 00:48:55,559
Speaker 1: Yeah, you're the fucking dog. It's funny because I never

974
00:48:55,639 --> 00:48:58,440
ran into you in comedy. I found you, I know.

975
00:48:58,480 --> 00:49:02,039
Speaker 4: I mean I knew who you were and then yeah,

976
00:49:02,079 --> 00:49:04,840
and then we met and then you call me in

977
00:49:04,840 --> 00:49:09,119
and we had like a really deep connective conversation. And

978
00:49:09,159 --> 00:49:11,199
after that conversation, I was like, all right, that's the homie.

979
00:49:11,280 --> 00:49:17,360
Speaker 1: Yeah, all right, well then we're in this bitch so

980
00:49:17,679 --> 00:49:19,519
yeah yeah yeah, Well I mean you came and you

981
00:49:19,519 --> 00:49:23,320
shared some really poignant stuff, some very vulnerable stuff.

982
00:49:23,559 --> 00:49:25,920
Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, yeah yeah. I was like it was funny

983
00:49:25,920 --> 00:49:28,039
because I was like I would like hold, you know,

984
00:49:28,519 --> 00:49:30,599
suppress all that stuff all night. And then finally I

985
00:49:30,599 --> 00:49:32,119
got to a point and I was like I got

986
00:49:32,159 --> 00:49:33,119
all out and then I was like, all right, I

987
00:49:33,119 --> 00:49:35,440
pulled back now. Yeah yeah, you know that first part

988
00:49:35,599 --> 00:49:38,039
was it with some crazy shit and they're like all right,

989
00:49:38,400 --> 00:49:39,320
like calm down, yeah.

990
00:49:39,199 --> 00:49:41,159
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, you gotta get it out. The flood gates

991
00:49:41,199 --> 00:49:43,519
got to open, you know, because I think the reality

992
00:49:43,559 --> 00:49:45,440
is do you mind me saying where we met? No,

993
00:49:45,599 --> 00:49:47,320
I don't know, Okay, So we met in the rooms

994
00:49:47,320 --> 00:49:51,480
of AA And I think the reality of addiction is that,

995
00:49:51,559 --> 00:49:54,559
like we drink and use because of the circumstances of

996
00:49:54,599 --> 00:49:57,400
our lives, you know, drinking and using at that demon

997
00:49:57,440 --> 00:49:59,000
and if you never let that demon out, it just

998
00:49:59,039 --> 00:50:01,039
grows bigger and bigger, and then it starts to control

999
00:50:01,079 --> 00:50:02,840
you and then it kills you. So it's like, I

1000
00:50:02,840 --> 00:50:04,559
feel like you were in a position where you were

1001
00:50:04,599 --> 00:50:07,480
finally getting honest about some abuse that had happened to

1002
00:50:07,519 --> 00:50:10,960
you in your life, and it did kind of all

1003
00:50:11,440 --> 00:50:13,719
just like pour out. But it needed to, didn't it

1004
00:50:13,760 --> 00:50:15,119
feel good? Yeah?

1005
00:50:15,199 --> 00:50:18,199
Speaker 4: Yeah, it did that definitely. I agree one thousand percent

1006
00:50:18,320 --> 00:50:21,679
that needed to happen for sure, And uh, yeah, the

1007
00:50:21,719 --> 00:50:25,800
support that I found from people, and then that phone

1008
00:50:25,800 --> 00:50:28,199
call that you gave me was like, especially at that time,

1009
00:50:28,199 --> 00:50:30,840
it was like I really needed that, you know. And

1010
00:50:30,880 --> 00:50:35,199
I was just like just hearing your story like in

1011
00:50:35,239 --> 00:50:37,599
an into it. I was like, you know it just

1012
00:50:38,639 --> 00:50:40,679
I was a psych had so much respect for it,

1013
00:50:40,760 --> 00:50:43,280
and I just related to it so hard, and I

1014
00:50:43,320 --> 00:50:47,480
was just like, damn, homie, Yeah, if I would have

1015
00:50:48,039 --> 00:50:49,599
I would have never known that about you, you know,

1016
00:50:49,679 --> 00:50:51,920
like if I well, right, and then you were like

1017
00:50:52,000 --> 00:50:55,280
offering help or just offering a you know, to be

1018
00:50:55,320 --> 00:50:57,239
a friend to me, and I was just you know,

1019
00:50:57,480 --> 00:51:00,639
on that level TOOHI just like crazy because people don't

1020
00:51:00,719 --> 00:51:02,440
understand that or can't relate to it.

1021
00:51:02,440 --> 00:51:04,840
Speaker 1: Right, yeah, right, yeah, And I think you know, I

1022
00:51:04,840 --> 00:51:07,360
don't have any direct experience with what you went through,

1023
00:51:07,360 --> 00:51:09,960
but my mom, you know, yeah, my mom was abused,

1024
00:51:10,000 --> 00:51:14,559
and it's like the the ripple effect of abuse within

1025
00:51:14,679 --> 00:51:21,159
family systems is so dangerous and so not talked about,

1026
00:51:21,639 --> 00:51:23,679
you know. I think there's so much shame around it.

1027
00:51:23,719 --> 00:51:27,320
And then also within family systems, people often protect abusers,

1028
00:51:28,079 --> 00:51:30,400
and I think there's just a lot of shame around

1029
00:51:30,440 --> 00:51:32,519
even bringing light to it. So I was so proud

1030
00:51:32,559 --> 00:51:34,519
of you that you were able to kind of look

1031
00:51:34,559 --> 00:51:38,199
at that wound for the first time and you know,

1032
00:51:38,440 --> 00:51:42,400
maybe realize that was the genesis of the addiction. And

1033
00:51:42,440 --> 00:51:45,119
I think since you've been more open about it, both

1034
00:51:45,159 --> 00:51:47,199
with yourself, in the rooms, with your friends, with whoever,

1035
00:51:48,840 --> 00:51:50,079
the healing started happening.

1036
00:51:50,360 --> 00:51:50,639
Speaker 4: Yeah.

1037
00:51:50,760 --> 00:51:52,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, like you're a different person now than

1038
00:51:52,840 --> 00:51:54,519
the Frankie I met over a year ago.

1039
00:51:54,559 --> 00:51:56,800
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, Like I was a hot mess.

1040
00:51:56,800 --> 00:52:00,599
Speaker 1: We're hitting the skids, babe, you come in.

1041
00:52:03,360 --> 00:52:05,360
Speaker 4: I can't relapse And I was just like trying to

1042
00:52:05,360 --> 00:52:06,960
get I was trying to get ahold of it.

1043
00:52:07,280 --> 00:52:08,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, but you've got some time now.

1044
00:52:09,360 --> 00:52:14,679
Speaker 4: Yeah, a year, next month? Crazy? No, not even building

1045
00:52:14,800 --> 00:52:16,800
even a weed gum. Yeah, let's burnt some ship down.

1046
00:52:19,719 --> 00:52:20,800
Bring out the plus.

1047
00:52:22,039 --> 00:52:24,559
Speaker 1: And that's what I've been saying, that's what this whole

1048
00:52:24,599 --> 00:52:30,000
show is about. Bring out the motherfucking But yeah, well, yeah,

1049
00:52:30,039 --> 00:52:32,159
what was the Do you want to talk about the darkness?

1050
00:52:32,199 --> 00:52:33,960
Do you want to talk about the Yeah?

1051
00:52:34,679 --> 00:52:36,880
Speaker 4: I mean out there, everyone.

1052
00:52:36,519 --> 00:52:39,519
Speaker 1: Has a different experience with their recovery and what they

1053
00:52:39,559 --> 00:52:41,360
went through and what they're willing to talk about. So

1054
00:52:41,519 --> 00:52:43,239
if there's anything I say that you want to cut out.

1055
00:52:43,280 --> 00:52:45,719
Speaker 4: We can, but like noah, I mean I yeah, I've

1056
00:52:45,719 --> 00:52:48,039
said I said a lot. I got pretty vulnerable on

1057
00:52:48,119 --> 00:52:49,559
my on my special yeah.

1058
00:52:49,440 --> 00:52:53,719
Speaker 1: Which, by the way, fucking like I can't watch stand

1059
00:52:53,800 --> 00:52:56,000
up specials because we do this all the time. I

1060
00:52:56,079 --> 00:52:58,639
watched yours start to finish in one s. I was like,

1061
00:52:59,639 --> 00:53:04,840
I was like, that's my fucking dog. That's yeah, it's

1062
00:53:04,960 --> 00:53:08,320
just so lovable on stage. It's such a like bright

1063
00:53:08,440 --> 00:53:10,360
light and you're so and I just was like.

1064
00:53:10,679 --> 00:53:13,239
Speaker 4: Oh, thank you for for saying that. I know, like

1065
00:53:13,320 --> 00:53:16,400
I was pumped. Like The Decider did like a review

1066
00:53:16,440 --> 00:53:19,119
on it, and they mentioned that they're like you could

1067
00:53:19,159 --> 00:53:22,000
see that he's like reached a point of like it's

1068
00:53:22,000 --> 00:53:25,079
coming through the screen like that he's healed and he's happier. Now, Yeah,

1069
00:53:25,239 --> 00:53:27,840
he got that he got through something. And you know, oh,

1070
00:53:27,960 --> 00:53:30,800
that's crazy that you could sense that, Like, yeah, you

1071
00:53:30,800 --> 00:53:31,480
could sense that.

1072
00:53:31,559 --> 00:53:34,239
Speaker 1: And I could also so sense that you were excited

1073
00:53:34,239 --> 00:53:36,960
to be there. Yeah, yeah, you were, like it was

1074
00:53:37,000 --> 00:53:39,800
a moment for you, like you know, like you were

1075
00:53:39,800 --> 00:53:42,360
like stepping into something new. Whereas like you know, you

1076
00:53:42,360 --> 00:53:45,079
can see sometimes comics like I watched myself back and

1077
00:53:45,079 --> 00:53:48,159
I'm like does she hate herself and every joke? She said,

1078
00:53:48,320 --> 00:53:48,760
because I.

1079
00:53:48,679 --> 00:53:51,480
Speaker 4: Said, I hate watching myself.

1080
00:53:51,559 --> 00:53:53,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, I hate watching myself back, but when I watched you,

1081
00:53:53,880 --> 00:53:56,519
I felt like the joy and the excitement of just

1082
00:53:56,559 --> 00:53:58,960
being there, and that was so special because I think

1083
00:53:59,000 --> 00:54:00,800
you don't see that with a lot of comics. There's

1084
00:54:00,920 --> 00:54:03,880
like just this this ultimate composure that can come off

1085
00:54:03,880 --> 00:54:06,079
as like like you watch Jessel Nick or someone like that,

1086
00:54:06,119 --> 00:54:08,800
who's a genius and he's brilliant, but it's just like,

1087
00:54:09,280 --> 00:54:10,760
are you enjoying yourself? You know?

1088
00:54:12,239 --> 00:54:16,679
Speaker 4: All right next to joke anyway, spoiler? I love it.

1089
00:54:16,719 --> 00:54:19,159
Speaker 1: I love it. It's fucking He was like when I

1090
00:54:19,280 --> 00:54:21,199
started stand up, I was like he was someone that

1091
00:54:21,239 --> 00:54:23,559
I very much looked up to, and I think he's

1092
00:54:23,559 --> 00:54:25,920
a brilliant writer and performer. But I'm just saying there's

1093
00:54:25,960 --> 00:54:28,599
like a lack of connection, and I felt like you

1094
00:54:28,639 --> 00:54:31,000
were so connected to the audience and to yourself in

1095
00:54:31,039 --> 00:54:33,519
that moment, and I think probably being sober for that

1096
00:54:33,719 --> 00:54:34,679
was a huge part of it.

1097
00:54:34,840 --> 00:54:39,320
Speaker 4: Yeah, honestly, that was one of my markers of you know,

1098
00:54:39,360 --> 00:54:42,719
because it was like January fifteen was the last I

1099
00:54:42,719 --> 00:54:45,519
had a mescal on the rocks that morning to take care.

1100
00:54:45,519 --> 00:54:47,039
Speaker 1: I always remember the last drink.

1101
00:54:47,079 --> 00:54:49,079
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, homie, I and I felt it. I was.

1102
00:54:49,119 --> 00:54:50,840
Speaker 1: I think this was a fucking mimosa.

1103
00:54:51,000 --> 00:54:52,039
Speaker 4: Yeah, what a bitch.

1104
00:54:54,840 --> 00:54:56,679
Speaker 1: But it was because I was hungover. You know.

1105
00:54:57,480 --> 00:55:01,880
Speaker 4: That's that's why my life. Yeah, after this mosa and

1106
00:55:01,960 --> 00:55:05,800
you did that's crazy. I'm going to go out with

1107
00:55:05,840 --> 00:55:10,400
a bang bitch. Let him know the champagne.

1108
00:55:10,400 --> 00:55:17,960
Speaker 1: Fucker. I'll show you, bottomless bitch, fourteen bottles fucking champagne.

1109
00:55:18,000 --> 00:55:18,159
Speaker 4: Later.

1110
00:55:18,199 --> 00:55:21,239
Speaker 1: They're like, all right, the bottom of is over. It's Monday.

1111
00:55:22,000 --> 00:55:23,599
The bottomlesssas are first.

1112
00:55:25,199 --> 00:55:27,679
Speaker 4: If I saw you, Like, if I just saw that,

1113
00:55:27,760 --> 00:55:30,079
I'd be like cool, another white girl having ASA. And

1114
00:55:30,079 --> 00:55:32,800
they're like, not knowing all the layers that actually come with.

1115
00:55:33,679 --> 00:55:35,760
Speaker 2: Man, we've been serving you orange juice for the past

1116
00:55:35,760 --> 00:55:36,400
two hours.

1117
00:55:38,119 --> 00:55:40,199
Speaker 1: I'm like, it's fine, I'm doing Mollie. I'm putting Bali

1118
00:55:40,239 --> 00:55:40,480
in the.

1119
00:55:43,000 --> 00:55:43,719
Speaker 4: Love of money.

1120
00:55:44,039 --> 00:55:45,599
Speaker 1: So a mess call on the rocks. That was your

1121
00:55:45,679 --> 00:55:46,159
last stress?

1122
00:55:46,199 --> 00:55:48,320
Speaker 4: Yeah? After, you know, I was. I had partied the

1123
00:55:48,559 --> 00:55:50,480
days before though, so it was just like that.

1124
00:55:50,400 --> 00:55:53,599
Speaker 1: Last January fifteenth. And then when did you film the special?

1125
00:55:55,480 --> 00:55:59,880
Speaker 4: Uh? When was it? Say? No, no, no, no, it

1126
00:55:59,920 --> 00:56:02,079
was later. It was like, I want to say, June,

1127
00:56:02,639 --> 00:56:03,199
June or July.

1128
00:56:03,320 --> 00:56:04,320
Speaker 1: Okay, so you had some time?

1129
00:56:04,480 --> 00:56:06,239
Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, And so I set up a marker. I

1130
00:56:06,239 --> 00:56:09,159
was like, yo, just stay sober until you record the special, right,

1131
00:56:09,760 --> 00:56:12,320
But then, you know, I started working the program, doing

1132
00:56:12,400 --> 00:56:13,639
the thing. And then once I made it to the

1133
00:56:13,679 --> 00:56:16,000
special and I had you at, homies sent me, hey,

1134
00:56:16,000 --> 00:56:17,639
you're gonna party now. And then it was like, not

1135
00:56:17,639 --> 00:56:19,159
not that they wanted me to go off the rail,

1136
00:56:19,559 --> 00:56:21,480
but because they heard me say that, like I'm in

1137
00:56:21,519 --> 00:56:23,760
a party after I record a special. But then I

1138
00:56:23,840 --> 00:56:25,599
was like, no way, I don't want to go back,

1139
00:56:25,679 --> 00:56:28,159
you know, to that. I mean, I was a hot mess, homie,

1140
00:56:28,239 --> 00:56:29,039
you know, yeah yeah.

1141
00:56:29,119 --> 00:56:31,639
Speaker 1: And it's also like it's such a funny thing as alcoholics,

1142
00:56:31,639 --> 00:56:33,480
we do this reasoning with ourselves, like I'm gonna get

1143
00:56:33,480 --> 00:56:35,320
it to this milestone and then I'm gonna burn it

1144
00:56:35,360 --> 00:56:38,480
to the fucking like I'm gonna get this fucking awesome

1145
00:56:38,519 --> 00:56:40,360
thing that I've been working my whole life for and

1146
00:56:40,400 --> 00:56:42,280
then I'm gonna burn it to the ground.

1147
00:56:42,599 --> 00:56:44,960
Speaker 4: I mean, it helps in the beginning, That's what helped me,

1148
00:56:45,119 --> 00:56:47,920
because the cravings are so strong, like I just want

1149
00:56:47,960 --> 00:56:50,199
to get a head changed. I want to fucking take

1150
00:56:50,199 --> 00:56:53,360
a shot, do a line, pop up, like do ecstasy,

1151
00:56:53,719 --> 00:56:56,360
like fucking whatever. You know you want it, so then

1152
00:56:56,360 --> 00:56:58,920
you like, no, don't do it. Yeah, but I always

1153
00:56:59,000 --> 00:57:01,559
tell myself like, hey, tomorrow, ho mare, I promise you,

1154
00:57:01,719 --> 00:57:03,599
we're gonna get a fucking bottle the Keila, We're gonna

1155
00:57:03,599 --> 00:57:06,679
get some Molly's. It's gonna be sick tomorrow, I promise you,

1156
00:57:06,719 --> 00:57:09,239
And I would just do it. Do that again the

1157
00:57:09,280 --> 00:57:12,719
next day. I promise you tomorrow tomorrow, and then and

1158
00:57:12,760 --> 00:57:15,239
then eventually, you know, and it got better. You're like, no,

1159
00:57:16,360 --> 00:57:20,400
I don't need that. It can be high on lifetter.

1160
00:57:22,199 --> 00:57:24,719
Speaker 1: You come in the door smoke blowing it. You're like,

1161
00:57:24,760 --> 00:57:27,360
I got the fucking cards, dude.

1162
00:57:27,480 --> 00:57:29,760
Speaker 4: Yeah, I just you know, you still think about it.

1163
00:57:29,760 --> 00:57:32,679
Obviously I love to party, but yeah, I just but

1164
00:57:32,840 --> 00:57:35,199
that train left, you know. It's just like, yeah, oh,

1165
00:57:35,239 --> 00:57:38,320
it got so bad getting getting willed out of the

1166
00:57:38,320 --> 00:57:41,360
fucking ANDAs the hotel next sort of the comedy store,

1167
00:57:41,360 --> 00:57:44,000
it was just like, fuck on man, Yeah, that was.

1168
00:57:43,960 --> 00:57:45,800
Speaker 1: Definitely what was that a three day bender?

1169
00:57:46,079 --> 00:57:49,079
Speaker 4: Yeah? I started so I remember I was I was

1170
00:57:49,079 --> 00:57:51,159
filming like the second season of this full I was,

1171
00:57:51,440 --> 00:57:53,239
and then I went to Jersey to do this Walking

1172
00:57:53,280 --> 00:57:54,840
Dead spin off, and then I and then I went

1173
00:57:54,880 --> 00:57:57,559
to Toronto to do uh what we do in the shadows.

1174
00:57:57,800 --> 00:57:59,599
And then I went to to Austin do some shows,

1175
00:57:59,599 --> 00:58:01,440
and I went to Vegas, took my mom and dad.

1176
00:58:01,480 --> 00:58:04,079
We went to see Santana and then I flew them home.

1177
00:58:04,079 --> 00:58:07,679
I kept extending my stay there and then fucking get

1178
00:58:07,719 --> 00:58:10,280
the EMTs called them on me at the Vegas airport

1179
00:58:10,800 --> 00:58:14,000
and fucking how did that happen? So I had been

1180
00:58:14,320 --> 00:58:16,400
I I hadn't slept in like a while, and then

1181
00:58:16,480 --> 00:58:18,159
and then I was like, fin, I gotta get home.

1182
00:58:18,199 --> 00:58:20,199
I extended as much as I could, so I take

1183
00:58:20,199 --> 00:58:22,800
a Xanax bar to chill myself out, you know, for

1184
00:58:22,840 --> 00:58:25,760
the fire fly. And I made it to the airport.

1185
00:58:26,199 --> 00:58:28,320
I made it through security everything, and I was like,

1186
00:58:28,760 --> 00:58:30,440
I need to eat something. Let me go to Jimmy Johns.

1187
00:58:30,440 --> 00:58:34,880
I'm already at my terminal and get to Jimmy John's

1188
00:58:35,079 --> 00:58:37,199
and I just started falling out. Bro, I don't buy

1189
00:58:37,199 --> 00:58:38,880
black out, you know, I don't even remember. I guess

1190
00:58:38,880 --> 00:58:40,679
I was like falling on this lady next to me,

1191
00:58:41,559 --> 00:58:44,480
and I had like a bag of like munchies at

1192
00:58:44,519 --> 00:58:47,159
like Humbo bag of chips, like it has like son

1193
00:58:47,239 --> 00:58:50,079
chips and like pretzels and other shit in there. And

1194
00:58:50,119 --> 00:58:52,199
I guess like my AirPods fell into the bag and

1195
00:58:52,239 --> 00:58:54,199
I'm trying to eat my AirPods and I'm just like

1196
00:58:55,079 --> 00:58:57,480
and I remember the security they have, like these undercovered

1197
00:58:57,519 --> 00:58:59,400
dudes at the airport. They just wear like a polo

1198
00:58:59,519 --> 00:59:02,920
shirts so they're not like strapped up all security vibes

1199
00:59:02,960 --> 00:59:05,000
that they're like undercover. And I remember seeing the guy

1200
00:59:05,039 --> 00:59:07,079
sit across from me and you're just looking at me

1201
00:59:07,119 --> 00:59:08,880
and it's like a little black polo and I know

1202
00:59:09,039 --> 00:59:12,119
I recognize those dudes. I'm like, fuck, homie. They say good,

1203
00:59:12,199 --> 00:59:15,280
you know, but I was fucking I don't remember the

1204
00:59:15,280 --> 00:59:17,159
they call the EMTs on me. They come and fucking

1205
00:59:17,159 --> 00:59:19,159
put the lights in my eyes. They checked my vitals.

1206
00:59:19,159 --> 00:59:22,079
They're like all right, like you know, he's okay, but

1207
00:59:22,239 --> 00:59:24,280
like he's like, you know, we're gonna come back and

1208
00:59:24,320 --> 00:59:25,760
check on them a little bit. But we have like

1209
00:59:26,159 --> 00:59:28,599
four other situations. Because it was the weekend of EDC,

1210
00:59:29,239 --> 00:59:31,239
I didn't go to EDC, but I guess they're fulls

1211
00:59:31,239 --> 00:59:33,639
of shit. Was popping off, like medical.

1212
00:59:33,280 --> 00:59:34,960
Speaker 1: Wise, Yeah, yeah, no, everyone's over.

1213
00:59:36,119 --> 00:59:38,400
Speaker 4: They put me on the no fly list all this shit, right,

1214
00:59:38,440 --> 00:59:41,000
oh no, and I'm fucking I wake up on me

1215
00:59:41,079 --> 00:59:43,280
and I had slept, I guess for like a couple hours,

1216
00:59:43,840 --> 00:59:45,320
and I go and he's a restroom and I come

1217
00:59:45,360 --> 00:59:48,280
back and I realized all everything that happened. And then

1218
00:59:48,800 --> 00:59:51,280
these dudes that from Texas they recognized me, like, hey, bro,

1219
00:59:51,400 --> 00:59:53,519
you good, and I was like yo, like they're like, homie,

1220
00:59:53,559 --> 00:59:56,159
fucking the EMTs were here. We caught this couple trying

1221
00:59:56,159 --> 00:59:58,159
to film you, like they knew who you were, and

1222
00:59:58,199 --> 01:00:00,199
we fucking checked them on me. We're like hey, the

1223
01:00:00,239 --> 01:00:03,440
fuck and they're like, oh, I sorry, like fucking assholes,

1224
01:00:03,440 --> 01:00:03,679
you know.

1225
01:00:04,480 --> 01:00:09,480
Speaker 1: The private moment airport, public airport, Like what the and

1226
01:00:09,639 --> 01:00:14,239
I get barred the fuck out America. This is a

1227
01:00:14,360 --> 01:00:15,199
freak country.

1228
01:00:15,719 --> 01:00:18,639
Speaker 4: What the fuck is this? So I was like all right,

1229
01:00:18,639 --> 01:00:20,079
I was like I thank these guys, you know, but

1230
01:00:20,119 --> 01:00:21,679
I went to the restroom. I came back and I

1231
01:00:21,760 --> 01:00:24,800
really just just needed some sleep. And then I was fine,

1232
01:00:24,800 --> 01:00:26,159
and I was talking like this, all right, that's what

1233
01:00:26,239 --> 01:00:28,639
I felt that was. And I go find the like

1234
01:00:28,719 --> 01:00:31,760
supervisor lady that put me on the no fly list,

1235
01:00:32,039 --> 01:00:34,079
and she's like, I talked to her just for a

1236
01:00:34,119 --> 01:00:35,800
little bit. She's like, I can't believe I'm talking to

1237
01:00:35,840 --> 01:00:37,639
the same person from a couple of hours ago. I

1238
01:00:37,639 --> 01:00:39,639
was like, I just needed some sleep. I was like,

1239
01:00:39,880 --> 01:00:42,079
I had been working a lot, but also, you know,

1240
01:00:42,119 --> 01:00:44,079
I was raging. I was like, look, I had been

1241
01:00:44,079 --> 01:00:45,960
working a lot, I've been partying in Vegas. I just

1242
01:00:46,000 --> 01:00:48,119
needed some sleep. She's like, fuck a right, you look good,

1243
01:00:48,119 --> 01:00:50,280
and she put me back on the fly list, printed

1244
01:00:50,320 --> 01:00:53,639
out my tickets. I go to Burbank Airport and my

1245
01:00:53,679 --> 01:00:55,880
bags were already there. Because I checked my bags, there's

1246
01:00:55,960 --> 01:01:00,320
drugs in there that I was still having to go

1247
01:01:00,360 --> 01:01:02,599
to my condo. I saw a party I couldn't stop.

1248
01:01:02,920 --> 01:01:04,480
I was on a train that just like my body

1249
01:01:04,519 --> 01:01:06,320
was like keep it coming, keep it going in and

1250
01:01:06,360 --> 01:01:08,760
then so I sober up, and then like that weekend,

1251
01:01:08,800 --> 01:01:10,519
I had some sets at the laugh Factory in the

1252
01:01:10,519 --> 01:01:13,320
Comedy Store, and then after it was a Saturday night,

1253
01:01:13,440 --> 01:01:16,159
I was like, fuck, I'm gonna get a sweet homie

1254
01:01:16,199 --> 01:01:19,039
at the ANDAs you know, just fucking and then I

1255
01:01:19,079 --> 01:01:21,159
get a sweet like the fucking balcony. I think I'm

1256
01:01:21,199 --> 01:01:24,239
the guy and shit and then I just keep extending

1257
01:01:24,280 --> 01:01:26,960
the same thing from Saturday night. And then and then

1258
01:01:27,000 --> 01:01:29,400
I get like paranoid with these people that are in there,

1259
01:01:29,400 --> 01:01:31,320
even though they weren't up to no good. I was

1260
01:01:31,360 --> 01:01:33,960
just like everybody, get out, you know, like not all aggressive,

1261
01:01:34,000 --> 01:01:35,039
but I was like, hey, you know, I got a

1262
01:01:35,119 --> 01:01:37,880
jam soon. And so then I was just solo, and

1263
01:01:37,960 --> 01:01:40,320
I remember thinking like, fuck, the homies are right there

1264
01:01:40,320 --> 01:01:42,320
in the parking lot next door at the comedy store.

1265
01:01:42,760 --> 01:01:44,679
Like I could just tell them, like, yo, come over here,

1266
01:01:44,719 --> 01:01:46,760
like I need help or something. But I was like, ah,

1267
01:01:46,880 --> 01:01:49,519
fuck it, you know. And then and then I remember

1268
01:01:49,599 --> 01:01:53,360
like finishing like the drugs and then being like, you know,

1269
01:01:53,440 --> 01:01:55,480
getting all emo about it, like this is probably it.

1270
01:01:55,519 --> 01:01:57,920
I'm probably not gonna wake up, you know, take my

1271
01:01:58,079 --> 01:02:00,639
xanax bars, wash it down with a bottle royal, get

1272
01:02:00,679 --> 01:02:03,000
all emotional. I was like, probably not gonna wake up,

1273
01:02:03,159 --> 01:02:06,079
Like sorry, sorry everybody, Thank God for my time on earth,

1274
01:02:06,119 --> 01:02:08,920
like you know. And then dude, I guess I was

1275
01:02:08,920 --> 01:02:12,960
supposed to check out, you know, that Tuesday, and they

1276
01:02:13,000 --> 01:02:14,559
go in there and I don't know, they probably thought

1277
01:02:14,559 --> 01:02:16,159
it was dead, like my I guess my head. My

1278
01:02:16,159 --> 01:02:18,000
head was against a headboard. I'm just wearing a robe

1279
01:02:18,039 --> 01:02:20,800
like my blue my dicks all out and that was

1280
01:02:20,880 --> 01:02:22,599
pre embarrasing because I'm a grower, so it's probably like

1281
01:02:22,599 --> 01:02:25,199
a little all drugged out, like tucked in, like just

1282
01:02:26,039 --> 01:02:26,280
you know.

1283
01:02:27,840 --> 01:02:29,280
Speaker 1: You got an idiot.

1284
01:02:31,239 --> 01:02:33,360
Speaker 4: And they were like yeah, they're like and I wake

1285
01:02:33,440 --> 01:02:35,280
up and they're like, yo, you know, the paramedics are here,

1286
01:02:35,280 --> 01:02:37,920
and I was like what. I was like no, Like

1287
01:02:38,360 --> 01:02:40,199
it took me a little while to realize, like, oh fuck,

1288
01:02:40,920 --> 01:02:43,599
I woke up, like I'm still here. And I didn't

1289
01:02:43,599 --> 01:02:45,480
see it as like an attempt to like in my life.

1290
01:02:45,519 --> 01:02:48,559
I just was like I partied myself to to the end,

1291
01:02:48,599 --> 01:02:51,800
you know, like this is it. And then yeah, they

1292
01:02:51,800 --> 01:02:53,800
were like I was like no, I'm okay, and they're like,

1293
01:02:53,840 --> 01:02:55,679
oh man, we're here, we gotta take you and d D.

1294
01:02:56,920 --> 01:02:59,320
So you know, I was like all right, you know,

1295
01:02:59,639 --> 01:03:01,599
I got to get my shit together, but get up,

1296
01:03:01,599 --> 01:03:03,400
I get a hospital, go home, and two hours later

1297
01:03:03,440 --> 01:03:05,920
I'm partying again. And then that's when my sister was

1298
01:03:05,960 --> 01:03:07,800
like finally got a hold of me. Do her and

1299
01:03:07,880 --> 01:03:10,519
Chris Estrada were in the lobby of that hotel trying

1300
01:03:10,519 --> 01:03:12,280
to get up to my room. But they're like, we

1301
01:03:12,280 --> 01:03:13,760
can't let you up. He has to let you up.

1302
01:03:13,760 --> 01:03:15,079
Like the only thing you do is call the cops.

1303
01:03:15,079 --> 01:03:17,880
And Estrada told my sister like like, yo, I'm not

1304
01:03:17,880 --> 01:03:19,400
trying to get this full arrested. At least we know

1305
01:03:19,400 --> 01:03:21,360
where he is. Yeah, and just like fuck man, I

1306
01:03:21,400 --> 01:03:23,719
m I sister trying a baby at the house. I

1307
01:03:23,760 --> 01:03:25,800
put him through it. Man, my family, and it's just

1308
01:03:25,880 --> 01:03:28,599
like and you know you're not doing it intentionally. You

1309
01:03:28,639 --> 01:03:30,320
think you're just doing it to yourself because you're such

1310
01:03:30,360 --> 01:03:33,400
in a cloud and a fucking tunnel of just like

1311
01:03:33,800 --> 01:03:35,480
you know with all the drugs. You're like, this is it.

1312
01:03:35,599 --> 01:03:37,920
This is a path God laid out for me as well.

1313
01:03:37,960 --> 01:03:41,599
Die like get off fucking selfish like that. But but yeah.

1314
01:03:41,760 --> 01:03:44,119
Speaker 1: Yeah, I always thought when I was growing up, I

1315
01:03:44,159 --> 01:03:47,400
was like I won't see thirty. That was never the plan, right,

1316
01:03:47,679 --> 01:03:49,719
I didn't think I would. I just was like, I know,

1317
01:03:49,800 --> 01:03:52,280
I'm in a party as hard as I can until

1318
01:03:52,320 --> 01:03:55,599
I die. And that was the plan. That was like

1319
01:03:55,760 --> 01:03:56,440
the whole plan.

1320
01:03:58,440 --> 01:04:02,360
Speaker 4: I have to still be alive bottom bless Molly mos.

1321
01:04:03,280 --> 01:04:05,519
Speaker 1: Like most girls are like by this age, I'm going

1322
01:04:05,559 --> 01:04:07,199
to have a husband and yeah, yeah.

1323
01:04:08,760 --> 01:04:09,519
Speaker 4: I was like, I'll have.

1324
01:04:09,480 --> 01:04:12,599
Speaker 1: A casket right and I'll be in that bitch like

1325
01:04:13,039 --> 01:04:15,039
that was the whole plan. So getting sober really threw

1326
01:04:15,079 --> 01:04:17,719
a fucking wrench and everything because I'm just like, well, no,

1327
01:04:17,840 --> 01:04:18,960
I gotta be alive.

1328
01:04:19,199 --> 01:04:22,519
Speaker 4: No, but you're better sober for sure. No, no, no,

1329
01:04:22,559 --> 01:04:23,880
I gotta be alive. I guess.

1330
01:04:25,559 --> 01:04:27,320
Speaker 1: I just stay in this bitch.

1331
01:04:28,840 --> 01:04:32,719
Speaker 4: Yeah. The I remember the first four or five because

1332
01:04:32,719 --> 01:04:34,800
you know, my sister wrote me a letter like how

1333
01:04:34,840 --> 01:04:37,079
it would play out for each family member if I died.

1334
01:04:37,800 --> 01:04:39,440
Right after this time, she finally got a hold of me.

1335
01:04:39,480 --> 01:04:41,280
She's like, motherfucker, you promise me you're going to get

1336
01:04:41,280 --> 01:04:44,360
help for me if anything. I'm like, okay, yes, thousand

1337
01:04:44,400 --> 01:04:46,039
percent agreed. I was like all right, I'll do it.

1338
01:04:46,159 --> 01:04:47,639
And then she wrote me a letter of how it

1339
01:04:47,679 --> 01:04:49,679
would play out if I died for each family member.

1340
01:04:50,079 --> 01:04:53,719
And that's when like she tapped into something that was like,

1341
01:04:53,880 --> 01:04:55,280
you know, the lights came on. I was like, oh,

1342
01:04:55,320 --> 01:04:58,400
this ain't just about me. I'm affecting all these people

1343
01:04:58,440 --> 01:04:59,920
around me, you know what I mean, and they just

1344
01:05:00,079 --> 01:05:02,920
like fuck on me. And then so then it just

1345
01:05:03,000 --> 01:05:04,519
came like all right, how do I get away from

1346
01:05:04,519 --> 01:05:07,360
this ship because you know, we're sick. Like people don't

1347
01:05:07,400 --> 01:05:10,519
realize like that aren't addicts, Like there's a fucking part

1348
01:05:10,519 --> 01:05:12,480
of our brain that is like you need these chemicals

1349
01:05:12,480 --> 01:05:14,760
in your body right now. And you're like that's how

1350
01:05:14,800 --> 01:05:17,639
your brain's been wired, you know, because you're escaping whatever,

1351
01:05:17,760 --> 01:05:18,480
trying you need to.

1352
01:05:18,400 --> 01:05:20,599
Speaker 1: Get away from yourself. Yeah, you can't be in here

1353
01:05:20,639 --> 01:05:21,760
with everything that's happened.

1354
01:05:21,880 --> 01:05:25,199
Speaker 4: Yeah, it was fun. I remember the first four or

1355
01:05:25,239 --> 01:05:27,519
five days I was at rehouse site. Fuck, I could

1356
01:05:27,519 --> 01:05:29,519
have just got it because it was expensive, and I

1357
01:05:29,519 --> 01:05:31,719
was like I could have got an Airbnb and Joshua

1358
01:05:31,719 --> 01:05:34,079
Tree and locked myself up in there. And but then

1359
01:05:34,199 --> 01:05:35,039
but then I started doing it.

1360
01:05:35,119 --> 01:05:42,880
Speaker 1: I could have been there with Molly momsa these pills.

1361
01:05:44,039 --> 01:05:46,280
After these pills start to freaking out, take a couple.

1362
01:05:46,039 --> 01:05:52,599
Speaker 4: Of these, I was like, I'm glad we didn't party together, yeah,

1363
01:05:52,639 --> 01:05:55,519
because that was my jam too, like just you know,

1364
01:05:55,840 --> 01:05:59,079
Molly's and isolation and just like yeah.

1365
01:05:58,960 --> 01:06:01,280
Speaker 1: I was just like, yeah, I was.

1366
01:06:01,440 --> 01:06:02,800
Speaker 4: I wasn't doing anything that exciting.

1367
01:06:03,880 --> 01:06:05,119
Speaker 1: No, I mean that's the thing. At the end of

1368
01:06:05,119 --> 01:06:06,920
the day, it's like the party's fun, you know, when

1369
01:06:06,960 --> 01:06:09,199
you're younger, it's fucking fun and it's an escape. And

1370
01:06:09,199 --> 01:06:11,400
then as you age and continue to do it and

1371
01:06:11,440 --> 01:06:14,360
your body gets more tired, it's like not that fun.

1372
01:06:14,760 --> 01:06:17,599
It's like pretty fucking dark, and you're like smoking a

1373
01:06:17,599 --> 01:06:20,119
cigarette watching the sun come up, and you're like, is

1374
01:06:20,159 --> 01:06:24,840
this my life? That's not what anyone intended. I'm not

1375
01:06:24,880 --> 01:06:28,360
supposed to be smoking a cigarette with this homeless person.

1376
01:06:29,960 --> 01:06:33,079
Speaker 4: Dude, I've put some shady characters.

1377
01:06:32,800 --> 01:06:36,599
Speaker 1: Be Yeah, no, I know, I know it's funny to

1378
01:06:36,599 --> 01:06:38,760
think about, but I'm so happy you are almost out

1379
01:06:38,800 --> 01:06:41,119
a year and you're on the other side. It does

1380
01:06:41,159 --> 01:06:45,119
seem like listen, it's one day out of time and anything. Yeah,

1381
01:06:45,679 --> 01:06:49,480
but I'm happy for you. Do you think that when

1382
01:06:49,519 --> 01:06:53,159
you got more success and more money it got worse yet?

1383
01:06:53,280 --> 01:06:56,840
Speaker 4: For sure? Yeah, it put my shirt on steroids, especially

1384
01:06:57,320 --> 01:06:59,960
when the pandemic hit, you know, yes, because work would

1385
01:07:00,079 --> 01:07:03,719
kind of keep me, you know, be able to manage

1386
01:07:03,800 --> 01:07:06,800
my you know, vendors and stuff like that. And then

1387
01:07:06,880 --> 01:07:08,960
people knew that I partied, But even to this day,

1388
01:07:08,960 --> 01:07:10,320
they're like, I don't think we're that bad because I

1389
01:07:10,360 --> 01:07:13,199
did the worst of it in isolation, you know, just yeah,

1390
01:07:13,239 --> 01:07:16,960
and uh, but you know, if I didn't have any money,

1391
01:07:17,000 --> 01:07:19,239
I wouldn't party. I never got you know, I've tried math,

1392
01:07:19,239 --> 01:07:22,800
heroine all that, and it never got me. It was

1393
01:07:22,840 --> 01:07:24,639
like so I was never like stealing out of my

1394
01:07:24,679 --> 01:07:26,480
grandma's person, nothing like that. Like if I didn't have

1395
01:07:26,519 --> 01:07:29,400
money to party at then I would. I would only

1396
01:07:29,760 --> 01:07:32,519
party as much as I could afford. So like, you know,

1397
01:07:32,519 --> 01:07:34,719
I was thirty five, sleeping on my homies couch, chasing

1398
01:07:34,719 --> 01:07:37,800
this stand up dream, so like I wasn't gonna you know,

1399
01:07:38,079 --> 01:07:40,159
but I would still party like when I could. My

1400
01:07:40,199 --> 01:07:42,639
whole thing was once a month. That was my like

1401
01:07:43,159 --> 01:07:49,480
whatever my uh you know method or whatever. Yeah, yeah,

1402
01:07:49,519 --> 01:07:51,639
prisons myself and that would be very calculated. I'm like, oh,

1403
01:07:51,639 --> 01:07:53,440
it's been thirty days, you know, and I or like

1404
01:07:53,519 --> 01:07:55,599
finding an event or like a DJ and then and

1405
01:07:55,639 --> 01:07:57,960
then find some homies kicking and then I would get

1406
01:07:58,000 --> 01:08:01,280
my my pills or whatever, get my XA next for

1407
01:08:01,320 --> 01:08:03,519
the landing year when I was done, and I would

1408
01:08:03,559 --> 01:08:05,360
go on a bender like once a month, and then

1409
01:08:05,400 --> 01:08:07,239
I was very very calculated. I had to do it

1410
01:08:07,280 --> 01:08:08,920
every thirty days, and I'd be like, all right, that's

1411
01:08:08,960 --> 01:08:11,119
my stress release. And I was able to step away though,

1412
01:08:11,519 --> 01:08:14,840
But then it started getting into the you know, weekdays

1413
01:08:14,880 --> 01:08:17,720
and all that. And then when I started making money

1414
01:08:17,960 --> 01:08:22,600
and had idle time, it was just like it's probably

1415
01:08:22,640 --> 01:08:24,439
like I didn't you know, I didn't own anybody, no money,

1416
01:08:24,439 --> 01:08:26,199
only I'm paid my bills. It's like, what's up? You

1417
01:08:26,199 --> 01:08:28,319
can't tell me? Shit, Yeah, I'm like I'm gonna get

1418
01:08:28,319 --> 01:08:30,560
fucked up on me, you know, like I earned this ship,

1419
01:08:30,640 --> 01:08:34,079
you know. And then it just during the pandemic, it

1420
01:08:34,199 --> 01:08:38,520
just I turned into a labrat. Yeah, it's fucking just

1421
01:08:38,640 --> 01:08:41,720
a little creature. Like, yeah, I remember so one time

1422
01:08:41,760 --> 01:08:43,680
I was so strong out. Sorry I'm probably rambling on.

1423
01:08:44,800 --> 01:08:46,640
I was. I had been up for days during the

1424
01:08:46,640 --> 01:08:50,319
pandemic and and I was like all paranoid and ship

1425
01:08:51,279 --> 01:08:53,600
and I heard my I have like a little front

1426
01:08:53,600 --> 01:08:56,439
gate that goes into the front porch area, like you know,

1427
01:08:56,479 --> 01:08:58,760
each of our units has that. And I heard that

1428
01:08:58,840 --> 01:09:02,000
gate click and then open, and I'm like, funck on me.

1429
01:09:02,199 --> 01:09:04,640
They called the cops on me. It's probably like they're

1430
01:09:04,640 --> 01:09:07,439
here and it's over. I don't like either my neighbors

1431
01:09:07,439 --> 01:09:10,199
call the cops or maybe my family or something. They're

1432
01:09:10,199 --> 01:09:12,560
gonna come. I got all these drugs here like it's over,

1433
01:09:12,600 --> 01:09:14,640
They're gonna come in here, like just my mind just

1434
01:09:14,680 --> 01:09:17,319
went there like that. I'm like crawling on my living

1435
01:09:17,359 --> 01:09:19,199
room floor so they don't like see me or my

1436
01:09:19,279 --> 01:09:27,479
shadows just like tweaked out. I'm like crawling like like

1437
01:09:27,600 --> 01:09:30,319
Navy seal styles, like you can see me.

1438
01:09:30,560 --> 01:09:30,760
Speaker 1: You know.

1439
01:09:31,239 --> 01:09:34,279
Speaker 4: It's like a little creature of my old living room floor.

1440
01:09:35,079 --> 01:09:37,560
And and it was somebody going to the gate, but

1441
01:09:37,560 --> 01:09:39,760
it was it ended up being the gardener, you know,

1442
01:09:39,840 --> 01:09:41,560
and I'm like, fuck me, it wasn't the swat team

1443
01:09:41,720 --> 01:09:49,119
was invite party with you don't blow my cocaine away

1444
01:09:49,119 --> 01:09:53,680
with that blow. But yeah, it was fucking dude. The

1445
01:09:53,720 --> 01:09:56,159
ship that you know that I did on drugs is

1446
01:09:56,199 --> 01:09:56,680
so wild.

1447
01:09:57,319 --> 01:09:59,840
Speaker 1: But I'm also impressed that you were able to maintain

1448
01:10:00,439 --> 01:10:01,439
like your career.

1449
01:10:01,800 --> 01:10:03,680
Speaker 4: Yeah, I know. That's why a lot of people are like,

1450
01:10:03,960 --> 01:10:05,520
you know, there was a period where it was like

1451
01:10:05,560 --> 01:10:07,079
I'd be out in public and people are like, oh,

1452
01:10:07,239 --> 01:10:09,640
congratulations and killing it. In my head, I'd be like, dude,

1453
01:10:09,640 --> 01:10:12,119
I'm fucking I'm dying homi. Yeah, you know, I need help.

1454
01:10:12,159 --> 01:10:14,439
I was like spinning out of control. But it's like

1455
01:10:14,479 --> 01:10:16,920
I said, I did a good job of like doing

1456
01:10:16,960 --> 01:10:19,720
it in isolation, you know, like I would be fucked

1457
01:10:19,800 --> 01:10:21,920
up in public, but when I would really go overboard

1458
01:10:22,079 --> 01:10:23,560
was just being alone, you know.

1459
01:10:23,680 --> 01:10:26,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, but that's the that's the juxtaposition that

1460
01:10:26,960 --> 01:10:29,239
fucks you up, Like when everything looks great on the

1461
01:10:29,239 --> 01:10:32,600
outside and then on the inside you're fucking dying, like

1462
01:10:32,680 --> 01:10:35,640
you can't. There's no other explanation for it than addiction,

1463
01:10:35,880 --> 01:10:37,600
you know what I mean, Because it's like on paper,

1464
01:10:37,640 --> 01:10:41,119
you're making money, you're on TV, you're selling out comedy clubs,

1465
01:10:41,119 --> 01:10:43,439
you're doing X, Y and Z, you're living your dreams,

1466
01:10:43,560 --> 01:10:45,560
and then you're just dead inside.

1467
01:10:45,359 --> 01:10:47,319
Speaker 4: Inside and you don't and you feel like you can't

1468
01:10:47,720 --> 01:10:49,920
express that or like you get you don't want to

1469
01:10:49,960 --> 01:10:52,880
like complain to other people, especially other comics that are

1470
01:10:53,000 --> 01:10:55,319
trying to make it in this game, and you don't

1471
01:10:55,359 --> 01:10:57,720
want to be like, but I hate my wife right now. Yeah,

1472
01:10:58,079 --> 01:11:04,319
but comedy clubs, And you say, because it's you, we're like,

1473
01:11:04,359 --> 01:11:06,920
you know, because we're contract workers. So once I fulfill

1474
01:11:07,000 --> 01:11:08,880
that contract or do my weekend at a club or

1475
01:11:09,039 --> 01:11:11,760
film a show, once I'm done, it's like all right,

1476
01:11:11,880 --> 01:11:13,800
you know, and I got a little window of time

1477
01:11:14,199 --> 01:11:17,680
like if I had like three four days, especially like touring,

1478
01:11:17,720 --> 01:11:19,520
you know, you get home on Monday from the weekend,

1479
01:11:19,560 --> 01:11:22,760
then you know, you know, you're good until like Wednesday, Thursday.

1480
01:11:23,039 --> 01:11:25,760
It was always like those Monday, Tuesday Wednesdays started getting

1481
01:11:25,800 --> 01:11:30,119
worse and worse for me. You know, it was like, yeah, boy,

1482
01:11:30,760 --> 01:11:32,039
what a ship show, homie.

1483
01:11:32,159 --> 01:11:36,439
Speaker 1: Yeah truly, but you're on the other side.

1484
01:11:36,680 --> 01:11:38,760
Speaker 4: Yeah, thank god, I was like, because I was like

1485
01:11:39,319 --> 01:11:42,399
thank god. I was like, it was starting to definitely

1486
01:11:42,399 --> 01:11:44,720
affect my work. But the worst came of it in

1487
01:11:44,800 --> 01:11:47,720
the pandemic when they're you know, I was doing just

1488
01:11:47,760 --> 01:11:50,560
like mostly a lot of voiceover work and stuff like that.

1489
01:11:50,560 --> 01:11:53,319
Stuff that was keeping me afloat. And then you know,

1490
01:11:53,359 --> 01:11:56,159
but you can wear a mask and like hide your

1491
01:11:56,239 --> 01:11:58,560
fucking party.

1492
01:12:02,520 --> 01:12:04,800
Speaker 1: Oh god, you just have cocaine in the mask.

1493
01:12:09,000 --> 01:12:09,960
Speaker 4: Oh my god.

1494
01:12:11,760 --> 01:12:13,520
Speaker 1: I remember one time I was like.

1495
01:12:13,960 --> 01:12:16,079
Speaker 4: We had a they had like a COVID test like

1496
01:12:16,159 --> 01:12:19,399
scheduled for me for like an upcoming project, and I

1497
01:12:19,479 --> 01:12:21,119
was like, I totally forgot about it, and I had

1498
01:12:21,239 --> 01:12:23,520
been up all I hadn't slept doing lines and ship

1499
01:12:24,159 --> 01:12:25,920
and then I got the text like, hey, reminder of

1500
01:12:25,920 --> 01:12:30,199
your COVID test today and yeah, and I'm just like

1501
01:12:30,319 --> 01:12:32,760
the go up there to swap, take a shower, and

1502
01:12:32,880 --> 01:12:34,479
do another line. I try to blow my nose as

1503
01:12:34,560 --> 01:12:36,159
much as I can, and then I gotta go to

1504
01:12:36,199 --> 01:12:38,600
the fucking the lot, the studio a lot and I

1505
01:12:38,640 --> 01:12:41,720
take an UBER obviously, and I'm just like like a

1506
01:12:41,760 --> 01:12:47,399
lotter in the backseat. Uber show up on me and

1507
01:12:47,479 --> 01:12:49,239
there's like a line, you know, and they're like, Frankie,

1508
01:12:49,239 --> 01:12:50,479
but you got the mask and then you got to

1509
01:12:50,520 --> 01:12:51,720
pull it down and hold me.

1510
01:12:51,800 --> 01:12:55,439
Speaker 3: This the dude doing the COVID test, he like gets

1511
01:12:55,439 --> 01:12:58,079
it there and he pulls out this fucking like glob

1512
01:12:58,159 --> 01:13:02,079
a fucking party mucus, Like fucking oh.

1513
01:13:02,199 --> 01:13:04,279
Speaker 4: It was like red and it was like kind of

1514
01:13:04,279 --> 01:13:06,760
bloody and slimy, and you just like, oh, all right.

1515
01:13:06,840 --> 01:13:08,159
He just puts it in the thing and I was.

1516
01:13:08,119 --> 01:13:09,159
Speaker 1: Like give me that.

1517
01:13:11,239 --> 01:13:12,520
Speaker 5: But I was like, oh yeah, you know, I got

1518
01:13:12,560 --> 01:13:20,600
a little cold, but positive, but I past the tesla

1519
01:13:20,840 --> 01:13:21,960
like COVID.

1520
01:13:21,600 --> 01:13:24,960
Speaker 1: For you, I have COVID. I have all the other problems.

1521
01:13:26,720 --> 01:13:28,039
I have other illnesses.

1522
01:13:28,319 --> 01:13:31,000
Speaker 4: It's so nasty, dude, Oh my god.

1523
01:13:31,720 --> 01:13:34,039
Speaker 1: I feel like, for as successful as you are, you're

1524
01:13:34,039 --> 01:13:35,720
one of the most humble people.

1525
01:13:35,760 --> 01:13:39,000
Speaker 4: I know, oh you know, people tell me that, but like,

1526
01:13:39,000 --> 01:13:40,560
thank you for saying that, But yeah, I don't know.

1527
01:13:40,760 --> 01:13:43,000
My definitely my mom and dad instilled that in me.

1528
01:13:43,079 --> 01:13:46,399
Speaker 1: But because they're like you ain't ships.

1529
01:13:46,800 --> 01:13:50,159
Speaker 4: My mom definitely still talks ship to me, like you this,

1530
01:13:50,239 --> 01:13:51,960
and I'm like, I don't know.

1531
01:13:52,279 --> 01:13:54,880
Speaker 1: But my dad always says, humble yourself before God does

1532
01:13:54,920 --> 01:13:57,520
it for you, right right, It is like you got

1533
01:13:57,520 --> 01:13:59,039
to live with a healthy amount of fear, but you

1534
01:13:59,079 --> 01:14:01,000
go to the next level. Like we had a lunch

1535
01:14:01,840 --> 01:14:04,159
maybe six months ago, whatever it was, and I was like,

1536
01:14:04,199 --> 01:14:05,600
how are you what's going on? Like, how have you

1537
01:14:05,600 --> 01:14:07,800
been to da We fucking caught up for an hour

1538
01:14:07,840 --> 01:14:10,000
and a half, great lunch. I go on Instagram and

1539
01:14:10,000 --> 01:14:11,840
I saw that the night before you were hosting the

1540
01:14:11,880 --> 01:14:15,359
Emmys and this, well, doesn't even fucking tell me.

1541
01:14:16,319 --> 01:14:18,960
Speaker 4: Just presented some awards.

1542
01:14:18,079 --> 01:14:23,239
Speaker 1: Whatever whatever whatever presented. But still, yeah, that slipped the

1543
01:14:23,279 --> 01:14:24,720
catch up. But I was like, that would have been

1544
01:14:24,720 --> 01:14:27,000
the first and only thing I talked about for the.

1545
01:14:27,159 --> 01:14:28,520
Speaker 4: Entire guess what I.

1546
01:14:28,439 --> 01:14:31,279
Speaker 1: Did last night, but that you definitely didn't do it.

1547
01:14:33,920 --> 01:14:37,880
Speaker 4: Yeah, no, no, yeah, I don't know. I've never yeah,

1548
01:14:37,880 --> 01:14:40,319
I've never been like that, and I don't knock anybody

1549
01:14:40,319 --> 01:14:43,600
who was proud of, you know, their accomplishments and constantly

1550
01:14:43,640 --> 01:14:45,479
announcing it and stuff like that. But I'm just like,

1551
01:14:46,239 --> 01:14:48,479
you know, people see it. I did it, so I

1552
01:14:48,520 --> 01:14:48,800
don't know.

1553
01:14:48,840 --> 01:14:50,239
Speaker 1: I know, but I'm your friend. And you could have

1554
01:14:50,279 --> 01:14:52,119
also been like, hey, all.

1555
01:14:52,079 --> 01:14:57,880
Speaker 4: Right, now I'm gonna call you last night, bitch I

1556
01:14:57,920 --> 01:15:04,079
have and you don't. But yeah, but I was nervous

1557
01:15:04,079 --> 01:15:04,840
as hell to do that.

1558
01:15:04,880 --> 01:15:07,199
Speaker 1: Whoof I mean, you did great, but you did it

1559
01:15:07,239 --> 01:15:07,960
as creeper.

1560
01:15:08,159 --> 01:15:10,760
Speaker 4: Yeah, that was. That was dope that they asked me

1561
01:15:10,840 --> 01:15:12,800
to because they switch it up like the day before.

1562
01:15:12,840 --> 01:15:14,760
They were like, yo, would he be willing to do

1563
01:15:14,760 --> 01:15:17,760
it as creeper? They asked my manager or whatever, and

1564
01:15:17,800 --> 01:15:19,920
I was like what me. I was like, dude, that'd

1565
01:15:19,920 --> 01:15:22,479
be I was like hell yeah. And they they're the

1566
01:15:22,479 --> 01:15:25,279
ones that got me, like the they gotta they had

1567
01:15:25,319 --> 01:15:27,600
those made like the black tank top that creepers but

1568
01:15:27,640 --> 01:15:31,079
with a tuxedo print like the Emmy producers had that maide.

1569
01:15:31,119 --> 01:15:34,920
So I was like sick and so it helped out.

1570
01:15:34,920 --> 01:15:36,800
But dude, I was so nervous because I thought I

1571
01:15:36,840 --> 01:15:39,319
was gonna have like you know, staging time or time

1572
01:15:39,319 --> 01:15:40,720
of the Green. They told me it's gonna be a

1573
01:15:40,720 --> 01:15:42,960
little while, so I thought, okay, you know, you know

1574
01:15:43,000 --> 01:15:44,640
how they do. Sometimes they call you in and you

1575
01:15:44,720 --> 01:15:48,079
end up waiting a couple of hours. But showing up

1576
01:15:48,079 --> 01:15:50,239
and being on the red carpet, I was like, oh shit,

1577
01:15:50,560 --> 01:15:52,800
I was this gonna go. But like mad people, even

1578
01:15:52,840 --> 01:15:54,960
white people were like, hey, we love your word. And

1579
01:15:54,960 --> 01:15:57,600
they're like in gowns and ship and like tuxedos and

1580
01:15:57,600 --> 01:15:59,600
I'm just in my cutof So it's like, thank you.

1581
01:16:00,159 --> 01:16:03,399
Speaker 1: My manager is obsessed with you. And and Creeper he

1582
01:16:03,439 --> 01:16:04,600
couldn't stop talking about it.

1583
01:16:04,640 --> 01:16:05,000
Speaker 4: Turn on.

1584
01:16:07,199 --> 01:16:10,600
Speaker 1: It's like I love Creeper. I'm like, okay, we get it,

1585
01:16:10,720 --> 01:16:11,960
but I I talk.

1586
01:16:11,880 --> 01:16:13,720
Speaker 4: You about it. I wear my cutoffs next time.

1587
01:16:15,760 --> 01:16:17,560
Speaker 1: But where did Creeper come from?

1588
01:16:18,119 --> 01:16:20,560
Speaker 4: Yeah? My I mean my dad first and foremost. He

1589
01:16:20,680 --> 01:16:23,000
was like my dad was always like Chuck Taylor's Dicky,

1590
01:16:23,119 --> 01:16:26,880
especially when I was younger, you know, low low rider

1591
01:16:26,920 --> 01:16:30,359
car club guy, just like he had the you know,

1592
01:16:30,359 --> 01:16:31,840
he used to have a sixty five and pollo up

1593
01:16:31,840 --> 01:16:34,279
the little chain steering wheel. And then his best friend,

1594
01:16:35,159 --> 01:16:38,880
my Nino John, my godfather, he baptized me. Uh. He

1595
01:16:39,000 --> 01:16:41,399
was president of this car club called me Heatho's Car

1596
01:16:41,439 --> 01:16:43,800
Club for like thirty three years. So I was always

1597
01:16:43,800 --> 01:16:45,680
around like the positive side of the culture. And my

1598
01:16:45,760 --> 01:16:47,880
dad's like one of the most positive people, you know,

1599
01:16:48,680 --> 01:16:50,760
especially when as he got older he kind of softened up.

1600
01:16:51,439 --> 01:16:53,439
And uh but even when I was younger, he'd just

1601
01:16:53,479 --> 01:16:55,680
be like, you know, you'd be driving me literally practicing

1602
01:16:55,720 --> 01:16:57,760
his lowrider like a mehole. You know, work hard, but

1603
01:16:57,800 --> 01:17:02,720
true people will respect and dah da dah that's what's up. So, yeah,

1604
01:17:02,760 --> 01:17:04,720
he can't. I mean, my dad's not a fitness instructor,

1605
01:17:04,760 --> 01:17:07,000
but yeah, you know I used that to tap into

1606
01:17:07,079 --> 01:17:10,960
the the thing. But yeah, yeah, Creeper was a yeah,

1607
01:17:11,039 --> 01:17:13,039
just an extension of that, you know, some influences from

1608
01:17:13,079 --> 01:17:15,319
other family members, cousins and stuff like that, because he

1609
01:17:15,399 --> 01:17:17,800
is a kind of like a over the top character,

1610
01:17:17,840 --> 01:17:19,560
but he's still very grounded at the same time, like

1611
01:17:19,600 --> 01:17:22,479
a lot of people, especially for my community, like Noah, Creeper,

1612
01:17:22,560 --> 01:17:25,279
you know, that's like so and so or whatever. Yeah,

1613
01:17:25,319 --> 01:17:28,319
so I didn't expect it to like blow up how

1614
01:17:28,319 --> 01:17:30,039
it did. But I remember we made that first trollo

1615
01:17:30,119 --> 01:17:32,600
fit video. Most of it was improv and I thought

1616
01:17:32,800 --> 01:17:34,439
we thought it was funny, but I didn't know, and

1617
01:17:34,520 --> 01:17:36,039
it was literally like, you know, we put it out

1618
01:17:36,399 --> 01:17:38,079
and the whole thing happened. Like I wake up the

1619
01:17:38,079 --> 01:17:42,840
next day, I had messages from Thailand and Australia and

1620
01:17:42,880 --> 01:17:45,600
Canada and all these places, all just like what the hell?

1621
01:17:46,319 --> 01:17:48,640
You know? I was like, even people that didn't know

1622
01:17:48,680 --> 01:17:51,119
what a trollo was, they still gravitated towards Creeper for

1623
01:17:51,159 --> 01:17:54,479
whatever reason. So then it was like then I started

1624
01:17:54,520 --> 01:17:55,319
touring and then it.

1625
01:17:55,279 --> 01:17:58,039
Speaker 1: Was like, yeah, just you freaking.

1626
01:18:00,039 --> 01:18:04,359
Speaker 4: That's but yeah, that was that was that was dope,

1627
01:18:05,359 --> 01:18:08,119
and it was yeah, change, let's change everything for me.

1628
01:18:08,359 --> 01:18:11,319
Speaker 1: Yeah, Screeper. But for those of you listening who aren't

1629
01:18:11,319 --> 01:18:13,880
familiar with Creeper, go check out Frankie's Instagram page. He's

1630
01:18:13,920 --> 01:18:16,920
got all sorts of little videos of his home.

1631
01:18:16,920 --> 01:18:17,680
Speaker 4: We get on the program.

1632
01:18:20,760 --> 01:18:22,600
Speaker 1: How are you feeling after the Hulu special?

1633
01:18:23,520 --> 01:18:23,760
Speaker 2: Good?

1634
01:18:24,119 --> 01:18:24,359
Speaker 4: Good?

1635
01:18:24,520 --> 01:18:25,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a good feedback.

1636
01:18:25,960 --> 01:18:29,039
Speaker 4: Yeah it was good. Well, because you know, how do

1637
01:18:29,159 --> 01:18:32,079
I mean you just did one. It's just like, you know,

1638
01:18:32,319 --> 01:18:34,199
the crazy thing and you know, me and Ali were

1639
01:18:34,199 --> 01:18:37,079
talking about that. It was like the crazy thing about

1640
01:18:37,239 --> 01:18:40,880
filming a special is it's like you set the date

1641
01:18:41,159 --> 01:18:42,880
you know, and you're gonna have you're gonna have the

1642
01:18:42,880 --> 01:18:45,439
production there that day and da da D or whatever

1643
01:18:45,479 --> 01:18:47,840
weekend or whatever. For us, it was just that one

1644
01:18:47,920 --> 01:18:50,359
night we did two shows. And you know how stand

1645
01:18:50,399 --> 01:18:52,359
up is like, sometimes you're having a good week. Sometimes

1646
01:18:52,399 --> 01:18:54,479
you're having a mediocre week. Sometimes you're in the zone

1647
01:18:54,520 --> 01:18:57,159
on stage. Sometimes you're like, you know, it's just that

1648
01:18:57,159 --> 01:18:59,279
that riode homie, that's why you got to respect it.

1649
01:18:59,600 --> 01:19:01,399
Sometimes the stars do on the line and you know,

1650
01:19:01,439 --> 01:19:04,000
you're doing the same jokes that crushed two days before

1651
01:19:04,159 --> 01:19:07,359
or whatever the case is. And so you just hope

1652
01:19:07,399 --> 01:19:10,399
that you're having a good week that week or a

1653
01:19:10,439 --> 01:19:12,880
good day on the stage that day, because you're you're

1654
01:19:12,920 --> 01:19:15,079
gonna shoot it that day. There's no moving it because

1655
01:19:15,359 --> 01:19:18,079
you're having an off week. So it's almost like catching

1656
01:19:18,159 --> 01:19:19,960
lightning in a bottle, you know. You just hope you're

1657
01:19:19,960 --> 01:19:23,760
feeling good and uh, you know. And I was like

1658
01:19:24,640 --> 01:19:29,000
doing all my work, being on point with everything, and

1659
01:19:29,000 --> 01:19:31,119
my family flew up to Portland, everything, I flew my

1660
01:19:31,119 --> 01:19:34,399
sponsor up there with me. I was just like feeling good,

1661
01:19:34,439 --> 01:19:35,720
you know. And you know when you get to that

1662
01:19:35,840 --> 01:19:39,119
place like spirituales in a good place where I was like, look,

1663
01:19:39,279 --> 01:19:41,720
no matter what happens, man, you're doing good. I'm proud

1664
01:19:41,760 --> 01:19:44,239
of you. Most important thing is you're sober, You're alive,

1665
01:19:45,079 --> 01:19:48,039
and and so let's just do this, you know. And

1666
01:19:48,119 --> 01:19:50,439
so and then so we did the first show and

1667
01:19:50,760 --> 01:19:52,720
I felt okay. It was a you know, it's funny

1668
01:19:52,720 --> 01:19:56,039
doing stand up with with all the because you know,

1669
01:19:56,079 --> 01:19:58,000
on baldeas they gotta put a lot of anti shine

1670
01:19:58,560 --> 01:20:00,399
and so you feel kind of caked up up there.

1671
01:20:00,399 --> 01:20:02,000
And I was like, well, this feels you're not you know,

1672
01:20:02,039 --> 01:20:06,920
I work makeup when I filmed, but like on stage,

1673
01:20:08,600 --> 01:20:10,039
I feel like I was wearing like a little helmet

1674
01:20:10,119 --> 01:20:10,399
or something.

1675
01:20:10,439 --> 01:20:14,279
Speaker 1: I was like this, lady f Then I'm like, you know.

1676
01:20:14,319 --> 01:20:16,479
Speaker 4: Then you're I was like, am I yelling right now? Da?

1677
01:20:16,560 --> 01:20:16,840
Speaker 1: Da da?

1678
01:20:17,159 --> 01:20:20,079
Speaker 4: But the show went. The show went good. Interestingly, the

1679
01:20:20,119 --> 01:20:22,079
early show was a little rowdier than the later show.

1680
01:20:22,600 --> 01:20:24,800
But but I was like, fuck, did that go good?

1681
01:20:24,840 --> 01:20:27,319
And I got off stage, and you know, and Ali Wong,

1682
01:20:27,319 --> 01:20:29,439
who was directing it, she was like, that was great.

1683
01:20:29,479 --> 01:20:31,159
And then the producers came out there like that was great,

1684
01:20:31,159 --> 01:20:32,199
and I was like, was it? It was like I felt

1685
01:20:32,199 --> 01:20:34,239
like I was young and I was like, was I sweating?

1686
01:20:34,239 --> 01:20:36,319
I didn't want to like keep patting my head with

1687
01:20:36,359 --> 01:20:40,479
the towel on camera from from like sweating it or

1688
01:20:40,520 --> 01:20:42,159
like you know, or just I just didn't want that

1689
01:20:42,199 --> 01:20:43,880
on camera. Bus But and I was like, do I

1690
01:20:43,920 --> 01:20:46,880
look sweaty? And then my makeup artist Homegirl, Aaron Blynn,

1691
01:20:46,960 --> 01:20:50,159
I love her. She was just like she was like, look,

1692
01:20:50,199 --> 01:20:51,800
I'm not going to let you look like that, Like

1693
01:20:51,840 --> 01:20:53,680
if you're looking on sweaty, I will ask them to

1694
01:20:53,680 --> 01:20:56,920
stop ship like we're filming. The audience knows we're filming,

1695
01:20:56,920 --> 01:20:59,000
like da da da. And then Ali was like, come here,

1696
01:20:59,039 --> 01:21:00,520
I want to show you some playback. And she showed

1697
01:21:00,560 --> 01:21:03,560
me the playback and it looked great, sounded great, you know,

1698
01:21:03,560 --> 01:21:05,960
the jokes were hitting, the crowd was great. And she's like,

1699
01:21:06,039 --> 01:21:08,199
we got it yeah, and she's like this next one

1700
01:21:08,279 --> 01:21:10,640
is just fucking have fun, like we already got it

1701
01:21:10,960 --> 01:21:13,359
so and I was like fuck yeah, so, like you know,

1702
01:21:13,439 --> 01:21:16,479
this kind of weight comes off you. So I went

1703
01:21:16,520 --> 01:21:19,479
in the second one like just letting my balls hang

1704
01:21:19,520 --> 01:21:21,520
and dah da da. And then like well then the

1705
01:21:21,560 --> 01:21:25,880
first thirty I would say, the first like minute or two,

1706
01:21:26,600 --> 01:21:29,680
I just felt everything just like, line up on me,

1707
01:21:29,720 --> 01:21:32,760
and I'm like, and I remember thinking, like about two

1708
01:21:32,800 --> 01:21:35,479
minutes into the set, I thought in my head, I

1709
01:21:35,520 --> 01:21:38,920
was like, thank you guy, this is it, homie. It's

1710
01:21:38,600 --> 01:21:42,720
the stars are aligning right now and it's time to

1711
01:21:42,800 --> 01:21:44,800
just get it. And then I was like, I just

1712
01:21:44,920 --> 01:21:47,680
was crispy my stage presence. I was feeling every movie

1713
01:21:47,760 --> 01:21:51,159
part in my face, every movie like, I was feeling

1714
01:21:51,159 --> 01:21:53,880
the audience, the energy in there. I was just like, dude,

1715
01:21:53,880 --> 01:21:56,159
when I got off stage, I couldn't help my physically,

1716
01:21:56,159 --> 01:22:00,239
couldn't stop myself from just yelling like yeah, you know.

1717
01:22:00,800 --> 01:22:03,520
I was like, we did it.

1718
01:22:04,880 --> 01:22:05,079
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1719
01:22:05,399 --> 01:22:07,439
Speaker 4: I was just like, that's it, you know. I did.

1720
01:22:07,840 --> 01:22:09,840
I did everything I could. I prepared as much as

1721
01:22:09,840 --> 01:22:12,399
I could. I gave it my all and that's that's it,

1722
01:22:12,479 --> 01:22:15,119
you know. So it's just like onto the next now. Yeah.

1723
01:22:15,119 --> 01:22:16,039
But I felt good.

1724
01:22:16,039 --> 01:22:18,159
Speaker 1: Though. Is there anything you're working on now that you're

1725
01:22:18,159 --> 01:22:18,840
excited about?

1726
01:22:20,479 --> 01:22:22,560
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm really excited about the movie that I shot

1727
01:22:22,600 --> 01:22:25,960
with Sigora and with Tom s Agora and Luke Wilson's

1728
01:22:25,960 --> 01:22:29,960
in It boy Tim Baultz next year. Sometimes yeah, they're

1729
01:22:29,960 --> 01:22:33,159
they're in post production right now. But that ship was

1730
01:22:33,199 --> 01:22:36,560
so fun because I just been I love like a

1731
01:22:37,239 --> 01:22:39,760
rated R hard comedy and I feel like, you just

1732
01:22:39,800 --> 01:22:42,399
we don't get many of those anymore, you know. And

1733
01:22:42,840 --> 01:22:45,199
even if I wasn't in it, I'd be like, hell, yeah,

1734
01:22:45,199 --> 01:22:46,680
I want to watch this. But the fact that I

1735
01:22:47,039 --> 01:22:48,760
got to be in it was was cool and it

1736
01:22:48,800 --> 01:22:51,039
was just so fun and same thing. Everything kind of

1737
01:22:51,039 --> 01:22:54,239
just aligned. The chemistry with the cast was great. Uh,

1738
01:22:54,439 --> 01:22:57,560
Genesis Rodriguez was on it. She she's like on Lioness,

1739
01:22:57,560 --> 01:22:59,680
you know, Wich is definitely not a comedy. It's like

1740
01:22:59,760 --> 01:23:02,520
she's such a great actress. So there's that like balance

1741
01:23:02,560 --> 01:23:05,279
of like people that can do drama well and then

1742
01:23:05,439 --> 01:23:07,479
helps the jokes hit harder. I mean, I play a

1743
01:23:07,520 --> 01:23:10,279
coked out cartel leader, right, just so dude. It was

1744
01:23:10,279 --> 01:23:12,119
so funny too, because like my first day on set,

1745
01:23:12,800 --> 01:23:15,800
you know, they put they make like a vitamin mix

1746
01:23:16,079 --> 01:23:19,000
that looks like cocaine, and then they'll put like they

1747
01:23:19,039 --> 01:23:21,880
dip the straw in like honey on the inside so

1748
01:23:21,920 --> 01:23:23,840
that you still could snort it, but most of it

1749
01:23:23,880 --> 01:23:25,720
gets stuck in the money, right, and then you're just

1750
01:23:25,760 --> 01:23:28,520
snorting vitamins. But it was funny because of one of

1751
01:23:28,520 --> 01:23:30,680
the ladies was like, what are the producers like, yo,

1752
01:23:30,720 --> 01:23:32,800
do you want to watch a quick tutorial on how

1753
01:23:32,800 --> 01:23:36,760
to you know, sell doing cocaine on camera? Like you know,

1754
01:23:36,800 --> 01:23:38,439
because they wanted to look real like.

1755
01:23:38,399 --> 01:23:40,560
Speaker 1: And I was twenty years of field research.

1756
01:23:41,800 --> 01:23:43,520
Speaker 4: I was like, oh, I've been to rehab twice. And

1757
01:23:43,600 --> 01:23:46,279
she goes, oh, okay, yeah I got this.

1758
01:23:48,039 --> 01:23:48,760
Speaker 1: She's like, so you're.

1759
01:23:51,720 --> 01:23:54,920
Speaker 2: If you need me to teach any other actress, we

1760
01:23:54,960 --> 01:23:55,840
could do it right here.

1761
01:23:55,920 --> 01:24:00,439
Speaker 4: Oh my god. So yeah, yeah it was a lot

1762
01:24:00,439 --> 01:24:02,840
of fun. But yeah, it was like I did a

1763
01:24:02,920 --> 01:24:05,000
couple of episodes of Saint Dennis Medical. I think my

1764
01:24:05,039 --> 01:24:07,880
episode just aired, like I mean I think I know

1765
01:24:08,319 --> 01:24:10,319
a couple of weeks ago. And then I just did

1766
01:24:10,319 --> 01:24:11,479
that that d m V thing.

1767
01:24:11,560 --> 01:24:13,520
Speaker 1: But and then we're going to get our show made.

1768
01:24:13,680 --> 01:24:14,920
Speaker 4: Yes, we're going to get I don't know if I

1769
01:24:14,960 --> 01:24:15,800
was allowed to talk about it.

1770
01:24:15,840 --> 01:24:17,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, we can talk about it. I mean whatever. I'm

1771
01:24:17,840 --> 01:24:22,520
just like I read a highlot called Degenerates and it's

1772
01:24:22,520 --> 01:24:24,960
about to rehab and I wrote a role for Frank.

1773
01:24:25,359 --> 01:24:31,479
Speaker 4: Yeah, and then and I was like yeah rehab, hell yeah,

1774
01:24:31,680 --> 01:24:35,079
right up my alley. But yeah, I remember I was

1775
01:24:35,119 --> 01:24:37,680
like I read the the script and I was like

1776
01:24:37,840 --> 01:24:41,640
hell yeah, and then you know, and we're now we're yeah,

1777
01:24:41,760 --> 01:24:42,560
then we're.

1778
01:24:42,359 --> 01:24:44,560
Speaker 1: Shopping it around. It takes time. The ship takes time.

1779
01:24:44,880 --> 01:24:45,319
Very annoying.

1780
01:24:45,520 --> 01:24:48,039
Speaker 4: Well then you went on your like world tour with

1781
01:24:48,199 --> 01:24:50,960
you know, okay, I don't know, allowed to talk about it.

1782
01:24:51,279 --> 01:24:51,880
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1783
01:24:51,960 --> 01:24:53,800
Speaker 4: I was like, damn girl, like we're on your Instagram,

1784
01:24:53,960 --> 01:24:57,319
like what the fuck like ocean Front Bella. I'm just.

1785
01:25:00,960 --> 01:25:02,880
Speaker 1: When you text me like next time you go somewhere,

1786
01:25:02,960 --> 01:25:07,600
let me come bags. We're going to Italy next to me.

1787
01:25:09,479 --> 01:25:10,920
Speaker 4: I was so happy for you. It did.

1788
01:25:11,079 --> 01:25:16,079
Speaker 1: It sucked what it went horribly wrong? It tits up.

1789
01:25:16,159 --> 01:25:17,199
Speaker 4: Yeah, we got with your man.

1790
01:25:17,439 --> 01:25:19,520
Speaker 1: No no, no, we got catfished by a hotel and

1791
01:25:19,560 --> 01:25:20,199
then we went oh.

1792
01:25:21,159 --> 01:25:23,119
Speaker 4: It was like how does those you know, the videos

1793
01:25:23,119 --> 01:25:25,760
go like I get away? Yeah. Yeah.

1794
01:25:25,920 --> 01:25:29,000
Speaker 1: It was supposed to be like this wellness retreat where

1795
01:25:29,039 --> 01:25:31,840
it's like you get facials and massages and there's these

1796
01:25:32,319 --> 01:25:35,359
pools that you like. What we got there, it was

1797
01:25:35,439 --> 01:25:38,800
just like mobbed with Russians. It was the worst massages

1798
01:25:38,920 --> 01:25:41,840
we've ever had in our lives. And we're like, we

1799
01:25:41,840 --> 01:25:43,119
looked at each other and we're like, we got to

1800
01:25:43,159 --> 01:25:45,479
get the fuck out. Of here, and then we went

1801
01:25:45,520 --> 01:25:47,920
to Milan and then Milan's kind of just a gray,

1802
01:25:48,239 --> 01:25:50,880
shitty dumb have you ever been.

1803
01:25:51,439 --> 01:25:53,119
Speaker 4: I've never been to Milan, but I've been. I've been

1804
01:25:53,119 --> 01:25:56,760
to Italy, you know, I've been to like Rome, Naples,

1805
01:25:57,399 --> 01:25:58,720
Mafi Coast was cool.

1806
01:25:58,720 --> 01:26:00,640
Speaker 1: Maas is great. I think if to go in the summer,

1807
01:26:00,680 --> 01:26:01,840
we went in the fucking winter.

1808
01:26:02,279 --> 01:26:05,279
Speaker 4: Okay, going to Chicago and winter.

1809
01:26:08,439 --> 01:26:11,000
Speaker 1: Obviously, I'm I'm admitting that we fucked up.

1810
01:26:12,439 --> 01:26:14,680
Speaker 4: It's all good. It was like a fire face.

1811
01:26:16,479 --> 01:26:19,439
Speaker 1: A fire festival. It was a character building trip for

1812
01:26:19,479 --> 01:26:20,399
our relationship.

1813
01:26:20,960 --> 01:26:23,920
Speaker 4: Oh hell yeah, hey, maybe that's what was in the plan.

1814
01:26:24,399 --> 01:26:25,000
Speaker 1: Are you dating?

1815
01:26:26,079 --> 01:26:29,159
Speaker 4: I'm trying. I recently started, like they, you know, also

1816
01:26:29,279 --> 01:26:33,439
focused on work and and well sobriety number one. Yeh,

1817
01:26:33,520 --> 01:26:38,520
work and then you know, not dying right and then uh,

1818
01:26:38,760 --> 01:26:40,039
you know, and then they're like, oh, you know, you

1819
01:26:40,039 --> 01:26:42,239
got to wait a year before you start thinking about that.

1820
01:26:42,279 --> 01:26:44,960
You know, I was in a relationship to who you know,

1821
01:26:45,079 --> 01:26:47,960
I still got you know, I still love that person

1822
01:26:48,079 --> 01:26:52,279
very much, but.

1823
01:26:50,560 --> 01:26:52,520
Speaker 1: But yeah, we the door open there.

1824
01:26:53,359 --> 01:26:55,199
Speaker 4: I don't I don't know, it's like, you know, I'm

1825
01:26:55,239 --> 01:26:58,239
definitely open to it, but like and we're still you know,

1826
01:26:58,319 --> 01:27:00,159
cool with each other, but you know, I don't to

1827
01:27:00,199 --> 01:27:02,399
press the issues, especially after what I put her through

1828
01:27:02,439 --> 01:27:06,800
of disappearing, you know. And but uh yeah, we broke

1829
01:27:06,880 --> 01:27:09,039
up like last October, so like just over a year ago.

1830
01:27:10,039 --> 01:27:13,159
And then recently I was like, all right, because you know,

1831
01:27:13,319 --> 01:27:15,199
my fuckers get lonely and shit, and it's like or

1832
01:27:15,239 --> 01:27:16,880
you just want somebody to hey, let's go to dinner,

1833
01:27:16,960 --> 01:27:20,039
like yeah, take you know. And then uh so I

1834
01:27:20,079 --> 01:27:23,319
started going on dates recently, and it reminded me how

1835
01:27:23,399 --> 01:27:25,359
much I fucking hate going on dates. You know.

1836
01:27:26,279 --> 01:27:28,279
Speaker 1: It's just like because you know in two seconds whether

1837
01:27:28,359 --> 01:27:30,079
or not you want to have the dinner with that person,

1838
01:27:30,520 --> 01:27:32,520
but then like oftentimes the answer is no, and then

1839
01:27:32,560 --> 01:27:33,800
you still have to you have to.

1840
01:27:34,800 --> 01:27:36,439
Speaker 4: I mean, luckily it wasn't like that. I was like,

1841
01:27:36,479 --> 01:27:38,720
all right, there was nobody that I'm like, and I

1842
01:27:38,720 --> 01:27:40,880
haven't been on that it literally been like on three days.

1843
01:27:40,880 --> 01:27:42,680
But it was like there was nobody that I was like,

1844
01:27:42,720 --> 01:27:43,880
I got to get the fuck out of here. But

1845
01:27:43,920 --> 01:27:46,039
it was definitely like, all right, this person's cool, but

1846
01:27:46,199 --> 01:27:48,560
you know, it's probably it's not my vibe or whatever

1847
01:27:48,600 --> 01:27:51,439
the case, but it's just that first initially, So you

1848
01:27:51,520 --> 01:27:54,399
like hiking, how many siblings you have?

1849
01:27:54,439 --> 01:27:55,119
Speaker 1: Where to grow up?

1850
01:27:56,279 --> 01:27:57,560
Speaker 4: Saying you have to do all those things?

1851
01:27:57,600 --> 01:28:00,399
Speaker 1: I want to kill myself. I feel like you go

1852
01:28:00,399 --> 01:28:03,520
on an icebreak, like I want to get to the

1853
01:28:03,600 --> 01:28:04,239
fucking kicking.

1854
01:28:04,520 --> 01:28:07,000
Speaker 4: Yeah, what's up, Let's go do this thing or whatever?

1855
01:28:07,159 --> 01:28:10,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah? Are you d ms open? Because

1856
01:28:11,000 --> 01:28:19,079
my my girls will fucking but the little listeners are gone.

1857
01:28:19,600 --> 01:28:25,760
Speaker 4: I got enough to take you to dinner, Red Lopster.

1858
01:28:26,159 --> 01:28:30,560
Treat you right, girl, do that Red Lobster and ingle Wood.

1859
01:28:30,600 --> 01:28:32,640
Speaker 1: You're so funny. Well, thank you so much for coming on.

1860
01:28:32,760 --> 01:28:35,520
I love seeing you, I love talking to your success.

1861
01:28:35,560 --> 01:28:37,800
Speaker 4: You're the homegirl, Bradany, I got mad love for you.

1862
01:28:37,920 --> 01:28:39,159
Speaker 2: I think you should teach him the word of the

1863
01:28:39,159 --> 01:28:40,359
week before he goes, oh.

1864
01:28:40,239 --> 01:28:43,279
Speaker 1: My god, word of the week. I do word of

1865
01:28:43,319 --> 01:28:45,640
the week because I'm trying to keep people smart. Okay,

1866
01:28:45,760 --> 01:28:47,039
do you want to pick a word or should I

1867
01:28:47,079 --> 01:28:47,479
pick one?

1868
01:28:47,800 --> 01:28:52,079
Speaker 4: Now? You pick one? Okay, wait, keep people smart? Are

1869
01:28:52,039 --> 01:28:53,319
you gonna tell me what that word means?

1870
01:28:53,439 --> 01:28:53,600
Speaker 1: Yeah?

1871
01:28:53,600 --> 01:28:55,199
Speaker 4: I'm going to be Okay, we're teach me a word.

1872
01:28:55,239 --> 01:28:58,319
Speaker 1: We're all getting smart together. Okay, Yeah, I just want

1873
01:28:58,319 --> 01:29:00,720
a bigger vocabulary. I feel like mine is not that.

1874
01:29:00,680 --> 01:29:03,239
Speaker 4: Great talk with an English accent, so will it feels smarter?

1875
01:29:03,359 --> 01:29:06,960
Speaker 1: Like? Okay, ardent? Do you know what ardent means?

1876
01:29:07,720 --> 01:29:09,680
Speaker 4: I've heard the word. I've definitely heard the word before.

1877
01:29:09,800 --> 01:29:12,159
Fun it means now you your girl listener is gonna

1878
01:29:12,159 --> 01:29:14,319
be like fuck stupid.

1879
01:29:14,359 --> 01:29:16,680
Speaker 1: They're gonna be like perfect, we can take a change.

1880
01:29:17,359 --> 01:29:19,520
Speaker 4: I get all his money.

1881
01:29:20,600 --> 01:29:26,079
Speaker 1: Ardent intense, passionate, devoted, characterized by high emotion. Ardent people

1882
01:29:26,119 --> 01:29:29,800
show great enthusiasm for causes and people close to them.

1883
01:29:30,039 --> 01:29:33,359
Barbara an Ardent stamp collector. Ardent stamp collector.

1884
01:29:33,439 --> 01:29:36,279
Speaker 4: Okay, yeah, it was like I thought it was, oh yeah,

1885
01:29:36,279 --> 01:29:38,039
that's my vibe, and then it's like Stamps.

1886
01:29:39,840 --> 01:29:44,239
Speaker 1: Stamp has the most impressive collection of French stamps in

1887
01:29:44,239 --> 01:29:48,000
the school. I hate that example. Ardent intense passionate. Frankie

1888
01:29:48,039 --> 01:29:58,199
is an Ardent cokeyser. Yeah, past tense, okay, Ardent whatever.

1889
01:29:58,279 --> 01:29:59,880
I don't know what I'm ardent about. What am I

1890
01:30:00,079 --> 01:30:05,800
ardent about? Really nothing? I'm kind of I'm the opposite

1891
01:30:05,880 --> 01:30:09,000
of ardent. I'm the opposite of Ardent. I'm like, uh,

1892
01:30:10,279 --> 01:30:13,000
You're I'm apathetic.

1893
01:30:12,760 --> 01:30:13,399
Speaker 4: You're ardent.

1894
01:30:13,600 --> 01:30:15,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm not really ardent.

1895
01:30:16,800 --> 01:30:18,000
Speaker 4: Know what do you mean? I feel like you're art

1896
01:30:18,159 --> 01:30:19,600
about comedy here.

1897
01:30:24,439 --> 01:30:27,399
Speaker 1: I do comedy. I do comedy because I'm decent at

1898
01:30:27,399 --> 01:30:28,479
it without trying too hard.

1899
01:30:29,520 --> 01:30:32,800
Speaker 4: Taking care of yourself. You do a good job of that. Oh,

1900
01:30:32,840 --> 01:30:34,560
thank you well, because you know you go to all

1901
01:30:34,560 --> 01:30:38,000
the places and the spas and the treatments and things.

1902
01:30:38,039 --> 01:30:38,279
Speaker 1: I know.

1903
01:30:38,960 --> 01:30:39,319
Speaker 4: I think that.

1904
01:30:39,760 --> 01:30:42,359
Speaker 1: My boyfriend I was talking about botox the other day.

1905
01:30:42,399 --> 01:30:46,600
He's like, you don't get botox. I was like, yeah, like,

1906
01:30:46,640 --> 01:30:47,520
why do you think I like.

1907
01:30:49,399 --> 01:30:49,960
Speaker 4: The fillers?

1908
01:30:50,119 --> 01:30:52,279
Speaker 1: Yeah? Oh yeah, they get the killer blindness.

1909
01:30:52,680 --> 01:30:54,159
Speaker 4: What is that? She explained it to me. Yeah.

1910
01:30:54,159 --> 01:30:56,640
Speaker 1: I was just like, because it looks like golf balls

1911
01:30:56,640 --> 01:30:57,239
in the cheek.

1912
01:30:57,560 --> 01:30:58,520
Speaker 4: Yeah, and they just get in there.

1913
01:30:59,239 --> 01:30:59,520
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1914
01:31:00,159 --> 01:31:02,800
Speaker 4: Fuck that's wild. Yeah, not knocking it.

1915
01:31:02,800 --> 01:31:04,880
Speaker 1: It was just, you know, it is. It's crazy what

1916
01:31:04,920 --> 01:31:08,439
we do to look three days younger. It's crazy what

1917
01:31:08,439 --> 01:31:11,239
we do to look like we slept last night. All right,

1918
01:31:11,279 --> 01:31:13,119
You're amazing. I love you so much. Tell everyone where

1919
01:31:13,119 --> 01:31:14,920
they can follow you find you all that shit.

1920
01:31:15,199 --> 01:31:18,720
Speaker 4: H yeah, you find me at at Frankie and you

1921
01:31:18,760 --> 01:31:21,079
probably can't spell that, so just google comedian Frankie Q.

1922
01:31:21,960 --> 01:31:24,800
Please watch Creeperscrib Live from my Compas garage on YouTube.

1923
01:31:25,159 --> 01:31:27,800
And then please watch Damn That's Crazy. It's on Hulu,

1924
01:31:27,880 --> 01:31:30,239
director by my homegirl, Ally Wong. That's my comedy special.

1925
01:31:30,279 --> 01:31:31,840
And then be on the lookout for me and Britney

1926
01:31:31,880 --> 01:31:33,800
Show coming to you soon. That's what's up.

1927
01:31:34,159 --> 01:31:36,800
Speaker 1: Hell yeah, I love you so much, Love you too,

1928
01:31:36,840 --> 01:31:40,479
Thank you for being here. All right, you guys, thank

1929
01:31:40,520 --> 01:31:43,039
you so much for tuning into this episode of Talking Schmid.

1930
01:31:43,119 --> 01:31:46,239
Go follow us on YouTube, and us is just me

1931
01:31:46,279 --> 01:31:50,720
and Biggie Small, so it's not just man here. Follow

1932
01:31:50,800 --> 01:31:54,039
us on YouTube, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, wherever you get your podcasts,

1933
01:31:54,079 --> 01:32:06,000
and we will see you next week. Besties, M