Speaker 1: This is doctor Wendy Walsh and you're listening to k
Speaker 1: I AM six forty the Doctor Wendy wallsh Show on
Speaker 1: demand on the iHeartRadio app. Welcome back to the Doctor
Speaker 1: Wendy Walls Show on KFI AM six forty Live everywhere
Speaker 1: on the iHeartRadio App. All right, I'm going to my
Speaker 1: social media into the DMS to answer some of your
Speaker 1: pressing questions about relationships. Reminder, I'm not a therapist. I'm
Speaker 1: a psychology professor, but I have written three books on
Speaker 1: relationships and did my dissertation on attachment theory. You could
Speaker 1: call me a relationship journalist, So let me weigh in,
Speaker 1: or the auntie with the best advice. Okay, here's one.
Speaker 1: Dear Doctor Wendy. A man i'm dating says he doesn't
Speaker 1: do well with maintaining relationships because his work requires him
Speaker 1: to travel far and often. Does this mean exit if
Speaker 1: I want a relationship, Well, this means you need to
Speaker 1: ask a lot more questions. You need to say to him,
Speaker 1: what do you think is required to maintain a relationship?
Speaker 1: Ask him what he's unable to do. If he says, oh,
Speaker 1: you know, daily phone calls or you know, having to
Speaker 1: see the person regularly when I can't be sure that
Speaker 1: I can. Then you're probably listening to somebody with an
Speaker 1: avoidant attachment style and his work protects him from intimacy.
Speaker 1: But I would definitely ask a lot more questions about
Speaker 1: what that means. And also I would ask yourself what
Speaker 1: you're looking for in a relationship. You know, maybe you're
Speaker 1: a single mom and has your kids every other week,
Speaker 1: and having somebody who's gone part of the time could
Speaker 1: be good because you're busy with your other stuff, but
Speaker 1: maybe not too. Maybe you want a deep, consistent, emotional
Speaker 1: attachment that involves FaceTime and regular calls and sharing a life.
Speaker 1: Right in that case, this guy's given you a warning,
Speaker 1: just to let you know be on alert. All right,
Speaker 1: Moving on, Hey, doctor Wendy, I have a question. Is
Speaker 1: a man being condescending when he says my career as
Speaker 1: a writer is cute? Or is that a compliment? I'm sorry,
Speaker 1: that is like our sarcastic dish that I was talking
Speaker 1: about before. Careers aren't cute? First of all, what does
Speaker 1: cute mean? Small? Little, young, pretty funny? Oh it's so cute,
Speaker 1: sey mino. That's what they say in French say Mignon
Speaker 1: say cute. You know what a filet Mignon is. It's
Speaker 1: a cute steak philet mignon. No, your career is not cute.
Speaker 1: If it's it's part of your identity, it's part of
Speaker 1: your creativity. It's something that should bring you self pride.
Speaker 1: I would definitely correct him on that that's not a compliment.
Speaker 1: That is not a compliment at all. And I would say,
Speaker 1: I just want to say one thing. He must be insecure,
Speaker 1: so he wants to put down your career because he's
Speaker 1: not so proud of his for whatever reason. So I
Speaker 1: think maybe the way to address it is, Hey, you
Speaker 1: know you told me once that you thought my career
Speaker 1: was cute. I wonder what you think of your career?
Speaker 1: Can we talk about it? Are we comparing? Like? Just
Speaker 1: ask you always shake your head, Kayla, because you're just
Speaker 1: so funny. I just you hear such a straight shooter
Speaker 1: like I am.
Speaker 2: I love that. I love it.
Speaker 1: I want people to learn just say it.
Speaker 2: It makes me happy.
Speaker 1: Just say it. I should write a book called just
Speaker 1: say It.
Speaker 2: You should.
Speaker 1: People are not expected to be mind readers in relationships. Okay,
Speaker 1: moving along to another listener question. Dear doctor, Wendy. Is
Speaker 1: it a red flag if a man in his forties
Speaker 1: says he's never been in love or is their first
Speaker 1: time for everything? Uh No, that's a huge red flag.
Speaker 1: That is a huge red flag. First of all, love
Speaker 1: is not something that happens to you. It's something you do.
Speaker 1: It is a verb. I often say it is the
Speaker 1: verb to give. So he's basically saying, I've never given
Speaker 1: enough of myself to anybody to be in a relationship.
Speaker 1: I've never chosen to do that. Love is also a choice.
Speaker 1: It's an intellectual choice. Yes, there's some chemistry involved in
Speaker 1: all that, but then you choose to go forward. Because
Speaker 1: you can have great chemistry with somebody who's terrible for
Speaker 1: you and make you can make the intellectual choice not
Speaker 1: to go forward. Right. You can also have okay chemistry
Speaker 1: with somebody who you want to just merge a life
Speaker 1: with and make it great, and you can make that choice.
Speaker 1: That's called intellectual love. Right. So, if he says he's
Speaker 1: never been in love and he's in his forties and
Speaker 1: he has no kids, I know you want to think
Speaker 1: you are the one you're gonna want. That's gonna turn
Speaker 1: him around. And it's because he hasn't met the one.
Speaker 1: It's not true. It's because he hasn't learned relationship skills,
Speaker 1: and a lot of it may go back to his
Speaker 1: early life and his family of origin. He hasn't learned
Speaker 1: how to love. And it's not your job to be
Speaker 1: his teacher. Just want to say, not your job to
Speaker 1: be his teacher. Dear doctor Wendy, how can you tell
Speaker 1: if someone just wants sex out of a relationship that
Speaker 1: should be very easy. They compliment you on your looks,
Speaker 1: they get all touchy feely. After sex, they kind of
Speaker 1: disappear because they got what they want and they don't
Speaker 1: come back right away. Somebody who wants more than sex
Speaker 1: courts you, spends time taking you out, sacrifices, spends time
Speaker 1: and money and energy, gets to know you, talks about life,
Speaker 1: your family, love, your goals, gets to know you intimately.
Speaker 1: But if all they're talking about your hop baby when
Speaker 1: we were getting together, they just want sex. It's pretty simple,
Speaker 1: but girls put blinders on. I don't know all right,
Speaker 1: I think we have time for one more before we
Speaker 1: go to a break. Dear doctor Wendy, My girlfriend is
Speaker 1: still very friendly with her ex's family. She calls them
Speaker 1: for the holidays and on their birthdays. She was with
Speaker 1: him for twelve years and considers them her family. It
Speaker 1: makes me uncomfortable. But am I being immature?
Speaker 2: Yes?
Speaker 1: First of all, why haven't you introduced her to your tribe?
Speaker 1: Why what is going on? And how long have you
Speaker 1: been with this girlfriend? All? Right, when people get together
Speaker 1: in a relationship, it becomes a bridge between tribes those
Speaker 1: you have no control over those tribal members. I know
Speaker 1: I did a segment on the show before I can remember.
Speaker 1: Layla Mohammad was doing the news back when, and I
Speaker 1: was doing this thing on if your ex is talking,
Speaker 1: if your family members are talking to your ex, what
Speaker 1: does it feel like? And she pipes in with my
Speaker 1: mom does that all the time. She's still in touch
Speaker 1: with my ex boyfriends. And it drives me crazy, And
Speaker 1: I'm just like, you know what, you can't control other
Speaker 1: people's relationships, right, If they have a friendship, they have
Speaker 1: a friendship. So it's not like she's getting on a
Speaker 1: plane and going to visit them for the holidays. So
Speaker 1: she's checking in on the holidays and their birthdays. Because
Speaker 1: she's done it for twelve years. You will eventually reshape
Speaker 1: her by giving her a new tribe, Introduce her to
Speaker 1: your family, take her out to stuff. That's how you
Speaker 1: do it, all right. Yeah, you're feeling a little insecure
Speaker 1: about this now. It would be different if you told
Speaker 1: me so. My girlfriend is very friendly with her ex
Speaker 1: and goes to have Christmas dinner with he and his family.
Speaker 1: That would be a threat, right, but you know, checking
Speaker 1: in with her old mother in law. I don't know
Speaker 1: if they're married or not or whatever, but twelve years
Speaker 1: is a long time. We have a relationship, and they're
Speaker 1: people too. She has a right to have them around
Speaker 1: in her life, so I kind of say, get over it,
Speaker 1: all right. When we come back, I'm going to continue
Speaker 1: answering your questions. Please feel free to send me a question.
Speaker 1: Kayla goes through them. She finds out which ones are
Speaker 1: good to read. If I don't get to it this week,
Speaker 1: we keep them in the hopper and next week I
Speaker 1: might get to it. So just go onto Instagram. The
Speaker 1: handle is at doctor Wendy Walsh at Dr Wendy Walsh
Speaker 1: and send me a direct message. When we come back,
Speaker 1: I'll have more of your questions. You're listening to the
Speaker 1: Doctor Wendy Wallh Show on KFI AM six forty Live
Speaker 1: everywhere on the iHeartRadio App.
Speaker 2: You're listening to Doctor Wendy Walsh on demand from KFI
Speaker 2: AM six forty.
Speaker 1: Welcome back to the Doctor Wendy wall Show on KFI
Speaker 1: AM six forty Live everywhere on the iHeartRadio App. I
Speaker 1: am answering your direct messages, your relationship questions. Remind her,
Speaker 1: I'm not a therapist. I'm a psychology professor. But I
Speaker 1: have a long life of experience and wisdom, and I
Speaker 1: have written three books on relationships. So let's get to it.
Speaker 1: Dear Doctor Wendy. My man's ex is the exact opposite
Speaker 1: of me. She's a different race, age, and height, just
Speaker 1: completely different. Is he really attracted to me or just
Speaker 1: trying to forget her? All right, we need to pause.
Speaker 1: There's some questions I have here. First of all, why
Speaker 1: are you so concerned with his ex? She's an ex?
Speaker 1: Why are you competing with her? Who cares? You have him?
Speaker 1: You one? Why are you being so insecure? So that's
Speaker 1: on you just want to say that. Then the next
Speaker 1: thing is, really, you're only a physical being, that's all
Speaker 1: you are to him, and so therefore, if you don't
Speaker 1: look like her, age, race height, then somehow he can't
Speaker 1: be attracted to you. Why do you think your value
Speaker 1: is only in what you look like? Maybe he loves
Speaker 1: your heart and soul and brain and mind. Maybe he
Speaker 1: loves your life experience. Maybe he loves what you do.
Speaker 1: Maybe he loves who you are. Is he just trying
Speaker 1: to forget her? I don't know. I will say that
Speaker 1: I do understand the confusion and the feeling, and I'll
Speaker 1: be honest. When I first started to go out with
Speaker 1: my husband, Julio, he used to say we'd be out
Speaker 1: around these long walks during COVID, holding hands and he
Speaker 1: would muse, because he's an extrovert, extrovert to he would muse,
Speaker 1: and he would say things like, it's so weird, I've
Speaker 1: never gone out with a blonde. I always go out
Speaker 1: with brunettes. Or he'd say I usually go out with Latinas.
Speaker 1: It's weird going out with somebody who doesn't speak Spanish,
Speaker 1: you know. Like he would bring up this stuff and
Speaker 1: I would literally pause in my tracks, turn and face
Speaker 1: him and go, what do you think this means that
Speaker 1: you're having these questions? I don't know. It's just weird.
Speaker 1: It's just different, you know, and not used to having blood.
Speaker 1: And I go, well, let me ask you this. Do
Speaker 1: you think you should have a woman who who speak Spanish?
Speaker 1: Do you think you should have a woman with dark hair? No? No,
Speaker 1: I'm just surprised. And then I'm like, okay, so what
Speaker 1: do blondes mean to you? I mean, he's going out
Speaker 1: with me, He's going to get that. I need to
Speaker 1: get to the end of this. And in the end,
Speaker 1: I think what came up is most of his desire
Speaker 1: to be with Latinas and dark haired women was to
Speaker 1: be the opposite of his mom, because when his mom
Speaker 1: was young, she was blonde. And I go, now you've
Speaker 1: come full circle. You come back into mommy's arms. Baby,
Speaker 1: It's okay. We analyzed it together. I didn't put it
Speaker 1: on my feelings. I was like, like, what is he
Speaker 1: trying to express? And I helped him learn about himself.
Speaker 2: All right?
Speaker 1: Moving on, this listener writes to me, dear doctor Wendy,
Speaker 1: when I got married, my husband started to request new
Speaker 1: things sexually that I'm not necessarily into. Should I oblige?
Speaker 1: Since I chose him for life? This is a million
Speaker 1: dollar question that comes up in relationships all the time.
Speaker 1: The thing about sexuality. It's a menu of things, and
Speaker 1: some people have a wider menu of options, and some
Speaker 1: people have a less of a menu. I have a
Speaker 1: dear friend who is a sex therapist, and she says
Speaker 1: this is presented in her practice on a regular basis.
Speaker 1: She would say that they try to find a common ground.
Speaker 1: What's most important is that both of you discuss your fantasies,
Speaker 1: discuss your desires, discuss workarounds and ways you want to
Speaker 1: do it now. I remember, years and years ago there
Speaker 1: was a columnist named Dear Abby. I don't know if
Speaker 1: anybody's old enough to remember Dear Abby. She was in
Speaker 1: every syndicated newspaper around and someone wrote just something similar
Speaker 1: to that, but because it was like the seventies or eighties,
Speaker 1: they worded it like, my husband wants to do things
Speaker 1: late at night that I don't want to do. What
Speaker 1: should I do? And her answer really surprised me, and
Speaker 1: it's stuck in my head because her answer was, you know,
Speaker 1: just because you're not hungry doesn't mean you shouldn't or
Speaker 1: a meal with somebody, or just because somebody made you
Speaker 1: a plate of something you don't like, you shouldn't try it. Right,
Speaker 1: So I brought that up in my human sexuality class
Speaker 1: when I was in graduate school, and the teacher said,
Speaker 1: dear Abby should be shot. Whoop. She said that class,
Speaker 1: no one should do something that they don't want to do.
Speaker 1: So I'm a believer in both things. There's a happy
Speaker 1: medium between both of those ideas, and the only way
Speaker 1: that it'll work out is if the two of you
Speaker 1: go to a sex therapist together, somebody who specializes in
Speaker 1: these issues, who understands that this is common and there
Speaker 1: are workarounds, because guess what, When you first enter a relationship,
Speaker 1: it's like ninety percent about the sex and lust and
Speaker 1: ten percent about everything else. Once you've been together a
Speaker 1: lot of years, it's about ten percent sex and ninety
Speaker 1: percent everything else. So make sure you're growing all the
Speaker 1: other parts of the relationship. Okay, I think we have
Speaker 1: time for one more. Oop. I just did that one, scrolling, scrolling, scrolling.
Speaker 1: Ooh oh oh, this is interesting. Dear doctor Wendy. My
Speaker 1: ex showed up at a party that he knew I
Speaker 1: would be at. He waited at the exit until I
Speaker 1: left so he could talk to me. I told him
Speaker 1: that I'm upset that he didn't let me enjoy my
Speaker 1: time with my friends, and he said I'm ungrateful because
Speaker 1: he wanted to see me. Was this a romantic gesture
Speaker 1: or alarming behavior? This is alarming behavior. This is not
Speaker 1: a romantic gesture. He's stalking you at this party. Now
Speaker 1: you have a choice. You go to a party, you
Speaker 1: see him there, you can choose to ignore him. I
Speaker 1: prefer that you go and do the classy thing and
Speaker 1: walk over and say hi, just wanted to say hello.
Speaker 1: We're not together, so I won't be talking to you tonight,
Speaker 1: but it's nice to see you here or whatever. Just
Speaker 1: move along. It's nice to see you here, and move
Speaker 1: along right, just to acknowledge acknowledge him, and enjoy your thing.
Speaker 1: Or you can leave. You can take some friends with
Speaker 1: you and just get out of there, right. But this
Speaker 1: will hang in at the exit, waiting to talk to you.
Speaker 1: It sounds like you broke up fairly recently, so it's
Speaker 1: raw for him and he's trying to win you back.
Speaker 1: And the fact that he responded with anger like you're ungrateful,
Speaker 1: it makes me a little bit worried, all right, So
Speaker 1: this is alarming behavior, Like you know what I would
Speaker 1: if you see him at the next party, leave right
Speaker 1: away and don't leave alone. Bring someone with you. Okay,
Speaker 1: that's what I would do. Okay, one more quick one, dear,
Speaker 1: talk to Wendy. Why do people on dating apps set
Speaker 1: updates and not follow up? Oh, it's an easy question.
Speaker 1: So for many people, they get enough hit of a
Speaker 1: dopamine knowing that somebody wants to go out with them.
Speaker 1: In other words, they get bored with just scrolling around
Speaker 1: and get a whole bunch of people in their message box,
Speaker 1: and then they set up stuff and they don't actually
Speaker 1: follow through. Hopefully they're not leaving you alone in a
Speaker 1: restaurant or coffee shop, but like they'll just say yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: maybe next week, and then they don't, right, Because there
Speaker 1: are people who get high off just the interest and
Speaker 1: they don't even need to go through the date. So
Speaker 1: that's why it's very important that you do not set
Speaker 1: up a date on a dating app. That you get
Speaker 1: on the phone very quickly and talk to somebody and
Speaker 1: you talk to them regularly, Okay, maybe do some FaceTime whatever,
Speaker 1: And so when the first time you meet, it shouldn't
Speaker 1: be a date. It should be a quick twenty minute
Speaker 1: drive by coffee somewhere drive by date that's it, and
Speaker 1: then decide if you want to go on a first date.
Speaker 1: But yeah, that's why they do it. They're getting enough
Speaker 1: of a dopamine high. All right, when we come back,
Speaker 1: you're in a brand new relationship. Here's what you should
Speaker 1: do in the first thirty days. And no, it doesn't
Speaker 1: hook up every single day with them. I'll explain when
Speaker 1: we come back. You're listening to the Doctor Wendy Wall
Speaker 1: Show on KFI AM six forty live everywhere on the
Speaker 1: iHeartRadio app.
Speaker 2: You're listening to Doctor Wendy Walsh on demand from KFI
Speaker 2: AM six forty.
Speaker 1: Welcome back to the home stretch of the Doctor Wendy
Speaker 1: Wall Show. Just a reminder, I'm here every Sunday from
Speaker 1: seven to nine pm. But if you miss any part
Speaker 1: of the show, just download the iHeartRadio app and you
Speaker 1: can listen to it anywhere. Search KFI or search Doctor
Speaker 1: Wendy and you will find it. All right. As I said,
Speaker 1: people are starting to get off those dating apps. We're
Speaker 1: seeing a decline in almost all of them, and instead
Speaker 1: people are moving to dms on Instagram because they see
Speaker 1: what friends they have in common or they're actually meeting
Speaker 1: in the real world. I want to talk particularly to
Speaker 1: men to how they can brush up on their dating
Speaker 1: skills if they're looking for a long term relationship. So douze,
Speaker 1: if you're looking for a hookup, you can turn this
Speaker 1: off right now if you're actually looking for a relationship.
Speaker 1: And some of this advice comes from my experience, some
Speaker 1: comes from my husband, Julio's experience, who tells me a
Speaker 1: lot about guys, and some of it I've read around.
Speaker 1: But I want to say this from the beginning. Julio
Speaker 1: told me that if you're he wants every guy to
Speaker 1: know this. If you're interested in having a long term
Speaker 1: relationship with a woman, don't risk touching her too early
Speaker 1: because you might scare her off. So if the focus
Speaker 1: is her beauty, her body and sex and reaching out
Speaker 1: and touching her, that sends her the message that you
Speaker 1: just want sex now. If you are wanting a short
Speaker 1: term relationship, of fine, go to it, but you'll scare
Speaker 1: off the woman who wants more, right, So let's talk
Speaker 1: about what you should be doing. The number one complaint
Speaker 1: that women have about men. I can't believe that this
Speaker 1: comes up in research study after research study is men
Speaker 1: with poor hygiene. I can't believe I have to say
Speaker 1: this out there, gentlemen, smell good, take a shower, be shaved,
Speaker 1: do whatever you're going to do that makes you look
Speaker 1: and feel good and smell clean to her. You should
Speaker 1: know that women have a much lower tolerance for the
Speaker 1: feeling of disgust. This has been proven in lots of
Speaker 1: studies than men do. So she's going to be hyper
Speaker 1: sensitive if you are not at your best when it
Speaker 1: comes to hygiene and dare I need to say this too,
Speaker 1: This is all like news for dummies. Please take her out.
Speaker 1: Group dates don't count. You know. I was researching my
Speaker 1: third book called The Thirty Day Love Detox, and I
Speaker 1: held a bunch of little champagne parties with women, and
Speaker 1: I'd asked them questions about their dating life, and I
Speaker 1: at one of them, was so sad to learn that
Speaker 1: one woman was twenty six years old and she'd never
Speaker 1: been taken on a date by a guy. She'd only
Speaker 1: been texted you want to go hang out and there
Speaker 1: would be just groups of people, and she was often
Speaker 1: expected to pay her way, and I was just like,
Speaker 1: you know, guys, doesn't have to be expensive. Okay, take
Speaker 1: her to the yard house. The California pizza kitchen. But
Speaker 1: you know, take her out, pack a little picnic, go
Speaker 1: for a hike, you know, bring a few granola bars
Speaker 1: and some bottles of water for it. You know, do
Speaker 1: something make her feel special. But do let her take
Speaker 1: her own transportation at the beginning, because she might feel
Speaker 1: unsafe with you as you're getting to know her. Take
Speaker 1: her on a drink, a date that doesn't involve drinking,
Speaker 1: doesn't involve drinking or eating. Take her on an experience.
Speaker 1: You know. One of the things that Julio and I did,
Speaker 1: mind you, We had the good fortune I say good
Speaker 1: fortune of meeting at the beginning of the pandemic, and
Speaker 1: so we couldn't go anywhere. So we did so many walks,
Speaker 1: We did so many hiking, We did all kinds of
Speaker 1: stuff that didn't involve going into restaurants or bars. You know,
Speaker 1: it's so funny that I have to say this, but
Speaker 1: you know, like let's say you're only dating like a
Speaker 1: few weeks, you still want to be careful with your
Speaker 1: bodily function skies. I mean, it's not the time to
Speaker 1: burp or have air come out the other way. I know,
Speaker 1: I know you can do it. We do it. Too.
Speaker 1: We hold it in. That's what you you need to do.
Speaker 1: You need to look like she can dust you off
Speaker 1: and take you out to meet her parents. Do show
Speaker 1: some kind of old fashioned manners, but don't go over
Speaker 1: the top. You see, there's two ways that manners can
Speaker 1: be interpreted by women. If you open doors for her,
Speaker 1: it can make her feel like she's too weak to
Speaker 1: do it or there's something wrong with her. It's also
Speaker 1: awkward if you tell her stay there, I want to
Speaker 1: go open the car door for you. You wait until
Speaker 1: I you know, walking around the fourteen feet of your
Speaker 1: suv to get to the door while she sits there
Speaker 1: is you know, kind of it's awkward, okay, But if
Speaker 1: you just get to the door first, open it. If
Speaker 1: you get to the table at the restaurant, pull it
Speaker 1: out for her. I particularly like man when I get
Speaker 1: up to go to the restroom at the restaurant, if
Speaker 1: they stand up when I stand up, I love that
Speaker 1: just for a second. That's what you do, all right. Also,
Speaker 1: make yourself available. Stop hiding behind your iPhone, the text whatever,
Speaker 1: Pick up the phone when she calls, call her, have
Speaker 1: real communication. I know what you're saying. That's the old
Speaker 1: fashion people test text. Now, I'm sorry, Do you want
Speaker 1: a robot text relationship for the rest of your life?
Speaker 1: Are you dating AI? Are you dating a human? A living, breathing, smelling,
Speaker 1: delicious human. Talk to this person, pick up the phone.
Speaker 1: Be honest and open about where you are in your life.
Speaker 1: If you're dating other people, say that, don't let her
Speaker 1: assume that you're the only one. And it is okay
Speaker 1: to date other people at the beginning, right, because you're shopping,
Speaker 1: she's shopping, right, Do some nice things for her, but
Speaker 1: don't always expect that she needs to reciprocate. You. See,
Speaker 1: traditional dating and courtship was about showing that you could
Speaker 1: sacrifice for her. That means driving far. I have to
Speaker 1: tell you a story at I can't remember a second
Speaker 1: or third date with Julio, and I was trying to
Speaker 1: look for places where we could eat outdoors. I was
Speaker 1: so afraid of that that pandemic, so afraid of that COVID,
Speaker 1: and so I said, oh, you know, we should meet
Speaker 1: outside on the cliff a tarannea resort and at the
Speaker 1: time I was living down on the South Bay. It
Speaker 1: was kind of close for me. And He's like, sure, sure, sure,
Speaker 1: And then We're eating outside on the picnic table with
Speaker 1: our takeout food. But I felt comfortable because it was
Speaker 1: windy and the virus was not coming to get me.
Speaker 1: And I said, oh, where did you come from? And
Speaker 1: he was like, Calabasses. I'm like, he drove from Calabasis
Speaker 1: down to Taranea, which is way pv like way down there,
Speaker 1: all because of me. He sacrificed. Right, What else do
Speaker 1: I want to say? Oh, don't be afraid, don't be
Speaker 1: afraid to try some humor. She will overlaugh even at
Speaker 1: your bad jokes if she likes you. You know, we
Speaker 1: did an episode of my Mating Matter podcast on humor,
Speaker 1: and there's all kinds of research to show that humor
Speaker 1: evolved as a mating strategy because it indicates high intelligence.
Speaker 1: Not every man is good with humor and know when
Speaker 1: a woman overlaughs at their jokes that she's into them,
Speaker 1: and they know when it happens. Right. Also, finally, in
Speaker 1: the first thirty days of a relationship, if you're not
Speaker 1: feeling it, move on, but don't ghost her. What does
Speaker 1: it take to just say hey, instead of I'm not
Speaker 1: feeling it, I don't like that TikTok guy, Just say
Speaker 1: you know, I think you're a really fascinating person, but
Speaker 1: I don't think romance is in the cards for us,
Speaker 1: and it was lovely meeting. You have some class, have
Speaker 1: some good communication, get out there and find somebody to
Speaker 1: love and stay connected with. That is the new trend,
Speaker 1: a real bond, and that brings the Doctor Wendy Wall
Speaker 1: Show to a close. It is always my pleasure to
Speaker 1: be here on Sunday nights wing in on your love life.
Speaker 1: As I said, if you miss any part of the show,
Speaker 1: just download the iHeartRadio app search Doctor Wendy Walsh. You've
Speaker 1: been listening to the Doctor Wendy Walls Show on KFI
Speaker 1: AM six point forty live everywhere on the iHeartRadio app.
Speaker 1: You've been listening to Doctor Wendy Walsh. You can always
Speaker 1: hear us live on KFI A M six forty from
Speaker 1: seven to nine p m on Sunday and any time
Speaker 1: on demand on the iHeartRadio app.