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YouTube dot com slash softcore History. Today on Softcore History,
we are talking about the Bell Witch. I could go
into a lot of details, but suffice it to say
it's spooky month and here is all you need to
know two facts. One this is the witch that the
Blair Witch Project was based on. And two this witch
tangled with Andrew Jackson. That is all you need to know.
I present to you Softcore Histories episode on the Bell Witch.
Speaker 2: Welcome to Softcore History.
Speaker 1: What is up? Welcome back to Softcore History. I am
your host, Rob Fox again, joined as always by Dan Regester.
Speaker 3: I'm sorry I didn't have a topic today. You had
to step up. You're pinch hitting. I get it going
back to back weeks. Oh the Humanity, Yeah.
Speaker 1: I mean I would have had to write an episode anyway,
and it would have probably been this exact same episode.
Speaker 4: We're talking about the Hindenburgh. Oh the Humanity, yep, yeah,
I know my history ship.
Speaker 3: There we go, oh hill Man huh joined by.
Speaker 1: Boush Alex Bouchemi. Boush is here our former memer. How
about this fellow writer? Yes, well, I mean a good friend.
He's our fellow writer. Yes, and uh yeah, he's a friend. Powell.
He's a guy, he's our pal.
Speaker 3: He's someone I enjoy hanging out with.
Speaker 1: We do love bo, don't. I don't see you enough?
Speaker 4: Well yeah, what do you got fucking ten kids now
or something?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, he doesn't miss to and change such a catholic.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Well, you know, look I put it in, something
comes out. I don't know what to tell you.
Speaker 4: You could pull out, you know, yeah, stay offered.
Speaker 3: Pulling out's unnatural.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's stupid. And we don't have sex that much.
I'm just three for three.
Speaker 4: We've had sex three times and.
Speaker 1: It's just yes, and so I am offer most of
the time. But every time I get on it it's
just yeah, out data in, data out, bad data in,
bad data out. But you know, yeah, it is what
it is.
Speaker 4: How you doing, dude, I'm doing good. I actually had
a fairly major surgery on Tuesday.
Speaker 3: I forgot about that. What.
Speaker 1: Oh is that why you can't drink that much?
Speaker 4: Yeah? Do you want to see the scars?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 4: Look at the shit.
Speaker 3: Oh, I can't believe you're drinking as is due.
Speaker 4: My belly button is never going to be the same.
It's like split in half.
Speaker 1: What is that thing you've a crossed me bag?
Speaker 4: No, that's just a bandage, okay, Because like what happened
was when you get older, sometimes your blood vessels change
in your body, and one of my blood vessels decided
to settle on top of a urrot or that leads
to my kidney, and so like my kidney couldn't drain piss.
So they had to just go in with these big
robot arms with chopsticks on the end and just fucking
rearrange my guts and now I now I'm better.
Speaker 1: Hey. Oh so it wasn't even rearrange kind of rope
like literally though, rearrange my yeah yeah, yeah, but they
had a robot do it. Yeah, as in, somebody was
off bring the robot.
Speaker 4: Yes, some Indian guy was operating.
Speaker 1: Was he in the building or was he even in
the country, because dude, dude, they literally his name was
doctor Mystery, and I never met him, like I never
met my surgeon, like.
Speaker 4: I met his partner. But so, yeah, he might have
just been operating on me from fucking a roombot.
Speaker 3: Operated on by the robot and fallout.
Speaker 1: There's a bomb inside of you, doctor Mystery.
Speaker 4: That would explain why you know, my stomach is just
beeping every now and the microwave.
Speaker 3: They're gonna make you do like things like rob a
bank kind of do their Yeah, their henchmen work, and
if you don't do it, they'll blow you up.
Speaker 4: I'm just a sleeper agent waiting to be activated like
Zuelander pretty much.
Speaker 1: That is. His name was doctor Mystery. Yeah, and you
did not find out where he was.
Speaker 4: Never met the guy. I never don't know what he
looks like.
Speaker 3: Now, was this hospital or a vet?
Speaker 4: It was it was this alley area and yeah, yeah,
yeah no, but yeah it was crazy dude. And then
I yeah, they patched me up, gave me some hydros,
and I'm all better.
Speaker 3: Now were you out?
Speaker 1: No.
Speaker 4: I spent the night in the hospital because they were like,
you know, they had to move my colon out of
the way. They wanted to make sure that, like they
didn't puncture it, and I was gonna fucking die. But yeah,
we all we made it. I farted out of my dick.
That was kind of crazy. You peeped, Yeah, I peeped, dude.
Like I they gave me a catheter, and I was
peeing in a catheter for a while. And if you
have a catheter for like over twenty four hours, you
get air bubbles in your bladder. They didn't tell me this.
So I get home and I take my first pee
and I'm just paying and then my peace stream stops
and then my dick makes this gurgling sound and it
just goes fucking man, and then I started peeking in.
I was like, what the fuck was that. I called
the doctor and they're like, oh, yeah, dude, you just
have air bubbles in your bladder.
Speaker 1: Oh a nightmare.
Speaker 4: Yeah, And it literally sounded like, you know, when you
turn the faucet on for the first time after they
shut off the water, It sounded like that.
Speaker 1: It was that.
Speaker 4: It literally was that Yeah, it was kind of crazy.
Speaker 3: It's like Christ, after you come the first time you piss,
you got the the viper piss coming out.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, so it's just that on steroids.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it was kind of like that. It was like
it was kind of crazy. And then the first time
I came, Yeah, I was gonna say, we have very
thick and viscous and just kind of it's just kind
of oozed out like like.
Speaker 3: Oh, you got an oil change, You're like good to go.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it was very thick jizz that just kind of
you know, didn't have any.
Speaker 1: Not very squeamish.
Speaker 4: But this is just you want to look at the
scars again.
Speaker 1: No, the scars don't bother me, dude. I look up
like pro lapsed photos all the time for my main
job at like, but this.
Speaker 4: Is just Yeah, catheters are.
Speaker 1: I never want to. I've avoided a catheter so far
in my life. Obviously, I know it will be impossible
to avoid that forever unless I get like t boned
on the way home and die or you know what
I mean, Like eventually I'll have a catheter. But god,
fuck that, dude.
Speaker 4: This was my second time within a month getting account.
Speaker 3: There's a good chance. You die young. Why every day's blessing?
Speaker 1: Oh I th they're gonna say, because only the good
die young.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but you're not good man.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so I'm good.
Speaker 4: They're gonna live forever.
Speaker 1: Boom boom. The idiots shit, can you imagine? What a moron?
What a moron are you? You walk into a room,
you light up every room you walk into.
Speaker 3: Buy Yeah, every time you change somebody's life for the better,
you're taking years off your life. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I walk into a room, everyone groans, I live forever.
Speaker 3: You're a cock.
Speaker 4: Every time you help an old lady cross the street,
that's a day of your life gone minimum.
Speaker 1: Yeah, if if, if someone, if someone, If you're living
and someone's like, you're the best person I know. You
don't have long to live.
Speaker 3: Right, Start smoking cigarettes. Blow that smoke into a baby's face,
spit on their mother.
Speaker 4: Yeah, you're gonna live longer smoking cigarettes than you are
going to be. Being nice to babies.
Speaker 1: Yes, absolute be nice to your own babies, but any.
Speaker 3: Other babies, they're not gonna be champions though, if you're
nice to them. If you want your kids to succeed,
you need to be a dead beat.
Speaker 1: Fault TWOA got spanked and he can't read anymore.
Speaker 3: He got hit too hard, kind of rattled his brain.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I suppose he's a nice Goldilocks zone.
Speaker 3: Of you can't give your kids ct before he plays football.
Speaker 1: He was spanked on the ass, spanked on the temple.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but he hit him so hard on the ass.
Speaker 1: Reverberated. Yeah, okay, Well, anyway, might as well get into
this week's episode since it's Spooky month here at Sophomore History. Yeah,
we Halloween horror nights right in the thick of it.
Speaker 3: Just like Bo's jizz.
Speaker 1: Yeah, thick is with thick thick into Spooky month, as
as Boosh's jizz. God damn it.
Speaker 3: Anyway, I will say though, So it was in organ
this past weekend and everyone that came up to me
was just like, you're a lot bigger than I thought.
And then they also mentioned you and like Rob, like
five eight do we give off like small guy energy?
Speaker 1: I'm fucking five eleven.
Speaker 3: I know what the And I was I towered over
these people.
Speaker 4: You don't look small in the in the on the screen.
Speaker 3: They said on screen, I do not appear as big
as I am.
Speaker 4: You guys got to do this standing up.
Speaker 1: Maybe apparently, like I'm two to three inches taller than
the average American male.
Speaker 3: I guess we give off bitch energy.
Speaker 1: Bitch. Yeah, I do have a running joke that my
wife has multiple bulls, So.
Speaker 3: It's not completely true.
Speaker 1: No multiple, it makes it sound like a lot. It's
too Yeah, it's people are stupid. Anyway, let's get into
this week's episode. Today we are talking about the bell
witch something a woman or something that is both a
witch and a ghost a ghost witch mm, which feels
like one of the most frightening combinations of supernatural entity
that you can have, like a witch ghost so you
get double pot you have witch powers and ghost powers.
Speaker 3: Right, Yeah, that's we set you on the stake. We're
trying to burn you. You go ghost mode? Oh no,
how do we get you?
Speaker 1: How do we kill you?
Speaker 4: Now?
Speaker 1: How do we burn you? Now? I mean you can
exercise her, I guess. But like I was trying to
think of other combos that would be worse than which
ghost and like maybe like a witch wolf, like a
witch were wolf, like a beast that has which that
can do evil magic.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's like really smart, but also yeah, can fuck
you up?
Speaker 1: Yeah, get like physically you have no chance against it.
And also it is crazy magic.
Speaker 4: Dude. You know how my kidney problem happened. I was
I was attacked by a spirit in the Philippines called
a dude.
Speaker 3: That's right, what is d so so, dude.
Speaker 4: I was in the Philippines. This is true, by the way,
right before, right before I got back and found out
I needed surgery, I was in the Philippines. It started
out as the best week ever and turned into the
most pain in full week ever.
Speaker 3: We were you were warn though, like they warned you
do not piss in the bushes without.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'll tell, I'll tell, Okay, Basically, we get to the Philippines.
It's amazing. I highly recommend going. We went to Randa
Or did he not just stay there and marry a
Filipino woman?
Speaker 1: No, it was World War two eight to kill Japanese guys. Oh,
but I bet I had you probably a better time
than he did. But he's still probably No he had
a woman. Yeah, I'm sure had a great time. He
was actually also a doctor in the army, So he
was just he.
Speaker 3: Was he just kept screaming gains him.
Speaker 4: He was He was doubly attractive to them then, but dude, yeah,
so it's great over there. Like we went to Manila,
we were like the only white people at this bar.
Everyone comes up to us, wants to dance with us,
take pictures with us. We felt like we're taller than
everyone and our money goes way further. So I felt
like an NBA player and uh but yeah, Like there
was this beautiful woman who's like half Filipino half Japanese.
She's like throwing herself at me. My friends are like, dude,
this girl's really hot and throwing herself at you. She's
definitely a prostitute. And I was like, dude, I don't
even care, Like, let's fucking do this.
Speaker 3: Let's go.
Speaker 1: Ready, eight dollars, it's fine.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it was like it would have been fifty bucks
to estee. So like I go back to the hotel
with her. We bang. It was amazing And afterwards I
was like, so how much? How much? And she was like,
what are you talking about? I was like and I
was like, oh shit, she's not a prospercate and I
quick thinking, I go, oh, I was gonna buy your
cab home. And she's like, oh, you're so sweet, but
I have a private driver who'll come get me. So
she was like a rich Filipido chick.
Speaker 1: Hell yeah.
Speaker 4: After Manila, we go to Shargao, which is this beautiful
beach island and it's the best week of my life.
I'm surfing. I meet this beautiful woman there and we're
like hanging out all week. And we are chilling at
this brunch spot and this guy is wearing a shirt
that says Shargau Skate and my friend's a skater, so
they're talking skate shit and the he's like, come to
this like private beach party with us, and we're like, yeah, sure,
let's go. So we go to this private beach party
and before we get there, he says, oh, by the way,
to of these guys are I don't know how you
guys feel about Filipino politics, but to these guys are
the president's sons, so don't talk shit about the Filipino president.
I was like, well, we weren't gonna do that anyway.
Speaker 3: Imagine the only thing you know about Filipino politics is
Manny Pakiow.
Speaker 4: Yeah that's all we know. I thought he was your president,
like your many Pakio says, but uh yeah. So we
go there and We're hanging out with the Filipino president's kids,
and it's just they're super nice guys. We're just they're
just like skater guys. And uh, Connor has to take
a piss, and so he goes to this bush at
the edge of the beach and he's about to take
a piss and then one of the president's sons is like, wait, wait, wait,
don't do that. Don't do that. Before you pee on
a bush, you have to say tabby tabi po, tabby
tabby po. And Connor's like what He's like, you have
to say tabby tabby po, tabi tabby poe means please move,
Please move, because there's spirits called dwende that live in
the bush and you have to tell in a movie
you'll pee on them. They'll attack your dick and make
it super swollen. And he's like says this gravely serious,
like he's like, do not do it. You will get
attacked by these and so Connor goes, oh, yeah, yeah.
I was like, I mean I could go for you know,
Woolen dick. I'm probably smaller than you guys, but.
Speaker 3: No gas station dick pills. I'll just take the ghost.
Speaker 1: Of Yeah, but don't make gas. Dick pills called.
Speaker 4: Yeah, so he says, says it and he peas and
he's good. A couple of nights later, I'm walking back
from the bar. I got a piss he forgot this morning.
I start, I find a bush. All the bars are closed,
so I find a bush. I'm peeing mid stream. I realized,
oh shit, I forgot to say Tobby, Tobby poe. And
what happens when I get back from the Philippines.
Speaker 3: Do you at least do it halfway through?
Speaker 4: My fucking kidney is swollen, dude, it's all part of
the urinary tract. The duende attacked my fucking dick.
Speaker 3: Dude, you had to have an exorcism for your penis.
Speaker 4: Yeah, dude, I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't.
Speaker 4: I don't need surgery. I need an exorcist. Penis exorcist.
Speaker 1: Find the right priest.
Speaker 3: That's most Yeah.
Speaker 1: They usually start with the dick, uh, but yeah, otherwise
so they can and it's a little boys.
Speaker 3: Yeah, smooth everywhere.
Speaker 4: That's all I have to do for it to look.
Speaker 1: Like it just feel a just feel like a like
a bathtub up with nair and roll around in it
for your good to go. But yeah, so we're talking
about the Bell Witch today. If you believe Bousch's Dwende story,
which I do because I like to believe in the supernatural,
then you'll like this. The bell Witch is actually the
woman slash ghost that the blair Witch Project is based on.
So this is the film blair Witch Project. The Blair
Witch is based on the Bell Witch.
Speaker 3: A Blair Witch Project is the u c F film.
Speaker 1: Schools Rounding Achievement. Yeah, their crown jewel they took. They
took a fucking cam quarder into the forest.
Speaker 3: And I also believe maybe some of those kids went
to Inner Barrow High School, which was a rival high
school Philly kids.
Speaker 1: It is set in Appalaysia, and the bell Witch is
from Appalachia. Those he's from Tennessee, Robertson County, Tennessee to
the specific, not wherever the fuck in Pennsylvania. The Blair
Which project was set. But the haunting began sometime in
eighteen seventeen when John Bell, who had just who had
a farm just gotten like a farm farm land in
the area. He was surveying his fields and he witnessed
the appearance of a strange creature that looked like a dog,
had a dog's body but a rabbit's head. So this
thing is just standing in his field in the middle
of Appalachia, and Belle of course picks up his musket
and is like, fuck that thing and shoots at it.
But it disappears. So already not a great sign that
your property's good bad from the get go.
Speaker 4: Time to move h just wildlife.
Speaker 1: Honestly, you're new enough to the country that you're like,
I don't know, man, maybe there's rabbit dogs.
Speaker 3: I don't know.
Speaker 1: I'm not not fucking right, you get I'm not scientists.
I don't even know what that word means.
Speaker 3: Property in Germany right now, if some weird creature came about,
I don't know, like a like a hawk rhino. Yeah, like,
I guess that's just Germany.
Speaker 1: Now, what does a hawk rhino?
Speaker 4: That would be has to be some big wings.
Speaker 1: Is that a rhino with the head and wings of
a hawk?
Speaker 3: What's the rhine land?
Speaker 1: Right?
Speaker 3: Yes, so I'm thinking a body of a rhino and
the wings in head of a hawk.
Speaker 4: Well, you know, unicorns sometimes have wings. And the way
unicorns came about was because they incorrectly described rhinos for
the first time that they like people would go to
Africa explore it, come back to Europe and be like,
we saw it was like four legged creature with horns
with a horn, and they're like, oh, so they recreated
it as a unicorn, but because they didn't know any
other four a creature that would look like look like
a rhino.
Speaker 1: Now, granted, rhyan and rhyine rhyane two different from two
different languages.
Speaker 3: Why do you have to ruin it?
Speaker 1: I don't know, just thought it.
Speaker 3: Why are you the way you are? Throw that out
there everything about you? Yeah, all right, this is why
you give off like five seven energy because I actually
two different languages and.
Speaker 1: Ares calls from Greek and ryde is from the old Gerbid,
which means to flow.
Speaker 3: Fucking nerd, which is true.
Speaker 1: That's what happened anyway, So the haunting begins with that.
Soon after, John's son Drew Uh sees a bird perched
on a fence on the family farm, and this bird
is fucking humongous to the point where he's like, that
can't even be a vulture. That's the biggest fucking thing
I've ever seen. Like there's just an ostrich or some shit.
It's a pterodactyl perch it maybe honestly, Uh, and and
Drew is just like I'm gonna leave. I'm gonna just
walk away.
Speaker 3: I mean there are like terodactyl sightings up to I
believe the thirties.
Speaker 1: Allegedly, and what what do you think? Those were?
Speaker 4: Big bird?
Speaker 3: Probably bad or hallucinating cowboys out in the canyons.
Speaker 1: It would be funny if there was just kile mescaline.
Speaker 3: The Grand Canyon just had a pterodactyl.
Speaker 1: Yeah, why not?
Speaker 3: I could get down with that.
Speaker 1: I'm down with any It's dude, it's October, dude.
Speaker 3: He fell what he fell down the canyon? Oh no,
we never found his body, but yeah, no he got
swooped up.
Speaker 1: Fucking terodactylate that bitch. Bell's daughter Betsy observed a girl
in a green dress who was swinging from the limb
of an oak tree on the property.
Speaker 3: Sexy. Uh and Dean, that's kind of kinky, right.
Speaker 1: I had not really, Betsy was really young and the
girl was really young, so I don't know. It was
an eight year old play in a tree. King.
Speaker 3: You didn't describe the age. You described a green girl.
Speaker 1: It's a girl.
Speaker 3: A girl could be a twenty four year old, and
I said, Betsy.
Speaker 1: His daughter also he could be fifty. Okay, well this
eight year old girl playing in a tree, which Dan
thinks may or may not be hot. Details matter, Yes
you saw that, and then uh, Deans.
Speaker 3: Sorry you did a bad job describing stuff.
Speaker 1: Sorry you got horny before you know all the details.
Like I just say, oh, there was a woman in
the room, there was a female in the room. Your
dick is hard, and I'm like a female baby, and
you're like, like, maybe we don't get hard till you
know all the details.
Speaker 3: I mean, when I was like thirteen, a woman walked
into the room.
Speaker 1: Would get my dick immediately. Yeah, I get that.
Speaker 3: Not at this age. You know, I'm probably pushing three
fourths of my potential. Gotta get that tea up.
Speaker 4: Dude, My dick's My dick has never been as hard
as it was when I was fourteen years.
Speaker 3: Old, Never will be. Those four year old chairs.
Speaker 4: Are just powerful.
Speaker 3: No, no, all the performance hands and drugs will never
get you.
Speaker 4: I would, I would get come on the ceiling when
I was fourteen.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I would.
Speaker 4: I don't know how, you know, I can't snipe like.
Speaker 1: That anymore nowadays. Yeah, just well for you, it was
his out.
Speaker 4: That was just the first one. That was the first
one post getting my organs cut open.
Speaker 3: It's like magma coming out of volcano, not.
Speaker 4: Like a Mount Saint Helens, like a slow.
Speaker 1: No, it's like a slow Hawaii. Yeah, I mean, what
a what a gamut? You ran from an ancient creature.
You peed on an ancient creature and it jumped up
your dick and so a robot operated by doctor Mystery
had to operate on you. Like do you like that?
Is every sci fi movie rolled into a week, dude.
Speaker 4: And dude, that shit popped off like the pain and
then the kidney started while I was still in the Philippines.
And you do not want to have a medical emergency
in Shargal because it's basically a third world country.
Speaker 3: Dude, Like they were in third world countries have decent medical.
Speaker 4: This place did not. And dude, I'm they they were
just like, okay, you're like your bladder area is very full,
so they're like we need to this like big Filipino
woman's like, we need to put catheter in you. As
I said, this is the first time I got the
catheter in the past month, and and I'm like, oh Jesus, like,
is there anything else we could do before this?
Speaker 3: Right?
Speaker 4: And she's like, well, I mean I'll just say that,
you could just sign this, say you refuse a catheter.
I was like, fuck, it sounds like I really need this, Okay,
let's do it. She and it wasn't the bad that
was backed up, he's the kidney if so they get
in there, you know, I get in this room, dude,
This hospital is a dirt floor. There is a stray
dog in the corner licking itself while my dick is out,
and they are they take out the catheter. There's a
spider eight inches from my face, and this large Filipino
woman is shoving a cather into my dick. She's shoving
it in there, and I'm just like praying to God.
And then she starts pulling it out. She pulls it out,
and then she starts shoving it in again. She takes
it out and puts it back in. I'm like, what
are you doing? Why are you fucking She puts it
back in, and then she takes it back out, like
what are you doing? And she's like, I cannot reach
the bladder. It is too swollen, and I was like, okay,
third time is not the charm. Is there anyone else
that can do this?
Speaker 1: Maybe?
Speaker 4: And she looks at me like she's gonna fucking kill me.
She is so offended that I asked for someone else,
and I'm like, I'm sorry, man, I'm just like really scared.
Right now, there's a spider next to my face. This
doesn't feel sanitary. And then she's like, Okay, it's too
swollen for us to get the catheter in there. We're
gonna give you pills that will help you pee. And
I'm like, I asked for another option before you did this,
but either way, none of it worked because I had
fucking kidney issues. So they just gave me enough pain
pills that I could get back to Manila see a
real doctor, and then they gave me antibiotics. Thought it
was better. Was had to get surgery.
Speaker 3: That's the who.
Speaker 1: You got surgery in America?
Speaker 4: Right, Yes, I got surgery in America on Tuesday.
Speaker 1: I can't believe you fucking flew. I feel like that
could be a pressure situation.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean, because like I thought it was done.
I thought it was just an infection that you know,
I got from god knows what. But the infection came
back when I got to America. That's when I went
to the urologist because the infection cleared up just with
antibiotics in Manila. But then so I flew back to
America thinking I was fine, but uh, then the infection
came back, same pain. Went to the doctor here. They
were like, oh, yeah, dude, you have a murder being consumed.
Speaker 3: You're bringing that back from a foreign country. Do you
have to check that condition of customs? No, do that.
Speaker 4: They were checking me for it last year actually, but
uh they were like, oh, you're you're bladderster. Your kidney
is still dreaming well enough that we don't need to
operate yet.
Speaker 1: The Dwin day is what.
Speaker 4: The Dwin Day really put the pressure on the right.
Speaker 3: But on the form did you put evil spirit in
my dick?
Speaker 4: I did?
Speaker 3: I did? And you're not allowed to bring plants, you're
not allowed to bring food.
Speaker 4: I was carrying a duende inside of my urinary tract.
They didn't. They You know, that's a good way to
get shipp through on.
Speaker 1: A human trafficking situation, to be honest, honestly, you're coyote
for evil spirit.
Speaker 4: Yeah, you can. It's you can shove stuff up your ass.
That's one way. But it's even safer if you shove
it up your bad, up your pole.
Speaker 1: Uh. So another I don't know if i'd call this
person a member of the Bell family, but Dean, their slave,
reported seeing a large black dog on evenings that he
visited his wife. And again, at this point, you've got
to be like about the wrong fucking piece of land. Uh.
Eventually this supernatural activity entered the Bell household. They would
hear knocking along the doors and walls of their home.
The family also heard the sounds of like gnawing on
their beds, like someone just chewing the bedpost, or some
ship like that bat duck. They would hear invisible dogs fighting,
and they would hear chains dragging along the floors. It
was about this time.
Speaker 3: Also, honestly, a ghost dog is not the worst thing.
Speaker 1: I disagree.
Speaker 3: Just gotta train that guy.
Speaker 1: What kind of dog with that gal? What kind of dog?
Speaker 3: It could be a rot wilder, I don't care.
Speaker 4: Having a ghost dog would be sick.
Speaker 3: Ghost dogs probably the best thing you could have.
Speaker 1: I think that's inaccurate. I think a ghost dog is
it'll fuck you up. If dogs are naturally friendly though
not a coast dog. You don't know that a hell hound. Hell,
they were talking hellhounds.
Speaker 4: Okay, bad dogs.
Speaker 1: What I'm talking to. All dogs go to heaven. This
dog was kept out of heaven.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's it's gotta be a really bad dog to
not get into heaven.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: But if you're running like a junkyard hellhound, sounds like
a hell of an investment.
Speaker 1: That's fine. But that dog's not going to heaven.
Speaker 3: I mean, he's just kind of lurking the land.
Speaker 1: But I'm saying, a live junkyard dog, that dog knows
what it's done.
Speaker 4: Why if they have guard dogs protecting the junk yard, Like,
why not let other people? The landfills are overflowing. Why
not let people get the junk if they want.
Speaker 3: It, because it's usually sold for parts.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a the junk junk yard is junk.
Speaker 3: Well, it's not a it's landfill.
Speaker 1: Because they buy junkers. They buy like shitty cars that
are yeah, and they just sell peace parts.
Speaker 4: Okay, I think.
Speaker 1: And you keep the dogs in there because you don't
want to pay security and you just hope that you're
rot wild. People will be like and.
Speaker 3: If a pit bull attacks a homeless man, it's not real.
Speaker 1: No one cares. And also like you don't and you
really don't care if that pit bull gets shot in
the face either, it's not really a problem. You just
throw the pit bull into a corner of the junk
yard and get a new pit bull, and then you
abuse that pit bull for a little bit. It's replaced.
That training is much cheaper than training or by paying
a security guard. All of that is cheaper than the
security guard.
Speaker 3: Absolutely, But now you have the eternal hell hound.
Speaker 1: Yeah, once it dies on the property. About this time,
John Bell also began experiencing paralysis in his mouth. All
the haunted, ghostly shit that was happening kept growing in intensity,
to the point where the witch, ghost witch whatever was
ripping the sheets off of beds as the children slept. Soon,
the quote unquote entity would pull hair and scratch the
children of the Bell family, with particular emphasis on Betsy,
who was slapped and pinched and somehow like the ghost
would just pick up pins and fucking stabber with it.
Speaker 4: But her sister was fucking with her. It was a ghost.
Speaker 3: Dad on me, stop pinching me. He's so silly.
Speaker 1: I didn't do it, Papa, a ghost did. I was
praying and it's eighteen seventeen. So the father is.
Speaker 4: Like, you're a good daughter, thank you.
Speaker 1: I must be a ghost in here.
Speaker 4: I saw a rabbit dog, Dad, you've been drinking a lot.
Speaker 1: Well, we'll get to that kind of Finally, the Bells,
the Bell family, that's why it's called the Bell Witch,
because this witch haunted the Bells. The Bell family was like,
all right, we got it. This. We got to figure
out if for fucking crazy or not. This can't like,
we need to figure out if we're just like going bananas.
So we have to bring someone else in, which I
actually respect, because if you recall, the Salem Witch Trials
were largely fueled by uh or partly fueled by ergot
er yeah yeah, so or you know what ergot is,
mold on the corn. That's basically LSD. It made them
trip nuts, tripp fucking balls. Yeah. So they were like,
we gotta figure out wh're fucking crazy. By the way,
crazy thing here, you're like eighteen seventeen, okay, America sound
or whatever. The Salem Witch Trials were as long ago
from this instance as we are from the turn of
the century from the eighteen hundreds to nineteen hundreds.
Speaker 4: Damn.
Speaker 1: So it wasn't that long ago. Not that there would
be you know, someone crushed to death by stones because
they're a witch at this point, but still.
Speaker 3: That could still happen, like Congo, Like what oh in the.
Speaker 4: Congo, Yeah, they literally do that.
Speaker 1: And there's places in Africa where they'll get real like
they kill, which is like I think that's like two
years ago.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I think there's place in the Middle East that
like stoning people to death is actually a way they
kill people.
Speaker 3: But I'm saying there are actual witches in Africa. In Africa,
they kill.
Speaker 1: There's like weird things that will happen sometimes in like
basically not in I don't want to say not in cities,
but like just in areas that are not well educated,
where like there's one thing I read about where a
rumor spread that bald men had gold inside of their skulls.
And you can imagine how that went.
Speaker 3: Prove I'm wrong. God, Yeah, I mean you got a check, right,
you got to confirm whether or not it's true. You're
going to figure it out.
Speaker 1: My favorite story was there's this one guy in Africa
who a witch doctor told him he would become like
a multi millionaire if he wandered into the bush at
night and let hyenas eat his penis, Oh my god,
like off of his body. So the penis was still
attached to his body.
Speaker 4: What's the point of having a million dollars if you've
got no dick? I truly, I guess if you're starving,
you know, I.
Speaker 1: Mean this guy was clearly not wealthy. So he wandered
off into the bush like basically put his dick in
a hyena's mouth. Ya was like, and uh what it.
Speaker 4: Just starts like just furiously licking it and just giving him.
Speaker 1: The come on, come on, don't don't want to be
a millionaire? Come you know what time is money, buddy.
Speaker 3: Group of people actually have these like bad witches that
they to this day fight off allegedly.
Speaker 1: Natives now Americans.
Speaker 3: Yeah they I guess they're called skin walkers. Yeah yeah, yeah,
I'm probably gonna do an episode on them for the Patreon. Okay,
so patreon dot com s last softcore history.
Speaker 4: If you didn't hear the intro to the show, that
was a very organic plug, well done.
Speaker 1: Skin Walkers are sick that's actually a very common thing
on TikTok.
Speaker 3: But I guess the white man kind of ruins the
lore quite often. We get it wrong. Oh really, yeah,
we were not very good, So I'm sure TikTok has butchered.
What skin walkers are. I thought you're about to say
they're they're very bad, they're very evil. I thought you
had to say that we were the skin walkers.
Speaker 1: No, because we're just like so pale. And then like
a Spanish guy walked, like a pale Spanish guy walks
up and he's like, how about we're not and that
people are like all the natives.
Speaker 4: They're like, it's a fucking demon.
Speaker 3: But they're bad witches that fight off like mystic Indians,
and they can they can turn into four legged creatures,
they can turn into wolves, they can turn in.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they can shape shift essentially. Yeah, skinwalkers are. That's
I look forward to the episode. That's a sweet topic.
So the Bells invite a family friend, James Johnson, and
a local prettcher over for help. Eventually they're like, please
stay here and let us know we're not fucking crazy.
So after going to sleep for the evening in the
Bell home, Johnston was awakened that night by the same shiit.
Same stuff happened with him, sheets pulled, gnawing on the
bedpost or whatever. Maybe he got stabbed with a needle.
I don't know, but all this, more or less all
the same shit happened to him. And he says to
John Bell in the morning, he says, that was a spirit,
just quote just like in the Bible. He's like, that
is biblical fucking shit. One hund you got something real here,
bar for bar, word for word, real real dog. Yeah,
bro bro bro holy. He he just comes out to
breakfast in the morning. He's like, mother fuger.
Speaker 4: Yo, dead ass.
Speaker 1: You got no calves, no cap bitch ass ghost up here?
Which ghost? I think, if I'm being real.
Speaker 3: I think that these people came into modern times and
saw how we talked.
Speaker 4: Oh they're like, oh God, they're all retarded.
Speaker 3: They probably they would prefer to be in this house.
Speaker 1: Yes, But I mean if you look back on like
letters at the time, like the Civil War. But there's
a there was some comedian who did a bit.
Speaker 3: I know, there's like smut.
Speaker 1: Adam Ferreira I think was his name, something like that.
He did a bit. It was I love.
Speaker 3: It was eloquent, right, like you're describing your wreads the
Civil War.
Speaker 1: No, but even all the Civil War letters were just
like my dearest Clara, I've had a difficult time being
away from you for so wrong my heart blah blah blah.
It's just like wonderful, beautiful letters.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 1: And then like his bit was like in deasert storm,
It's like he's just like, dear Claire, it's fucking hot
as ship. Here, my nutsack keeps sticking to all my
legs said, more fucking doritos, Like like we're just yea
garbage people, now, dud.
Speaker 4: My great great grandfather fought in the Civil War and
he kept a journal.
Speaker 3: I know.
Speaker 4: Yeah, we could do an episode on that if you
guys want.
Speaker 1: I'm oh, yeah, I think we talked four. We need
to for sure.
Speaker 4: But he had some eloquent ship in there.
Speaker 3: We'll just through the entire diary.
Speaker 4: Yeah, he's making crazy shit, some stuff that makes you
think differently about the North because he fought for the North.
Some stuff that makes you think differently about the South.
Speaker 3: Well, that's the thing. Great men used to keep journals diaries.
Speaker 4: Well, he knew he was doing something big and he
could write well because a lot of people couldn't write
back then. Yeah, so the ones that could took a
lot of pride in it.
Speaker 3: And but now we keep journals for like the self
help purposes, so stupid. Yeah no, dude, just write down
your day. Yeah, see what happened your own history.
Speaker 1: One of my favorite things from the show Generation Kill
was they found one of the dudes journals because he
was like keeping track of itthing, and it was just
like they're just like making fun of him for how gay.
It was essentially like he was just like one of
the quotes is almost exactly like he was like, I know,
my warrior spirit will overcome confider, Like what the fuck dude?
Like it was it was just like fighting your frat
bros journal basically, yeah, is this bag you fucking loser?
Like yeah, pompous asshole. But anyway, so they experienced this
and all three men, Bell, Johnson and the Preacher are like,
we won't tell We can't tell anyone about this because
a we don't want it to seem like you are
doing devil shit when you're not and be like this
could get wild whatever, so we will not say a
fucking word to anybody, but someone snitches because all of
a sudden, throngs of people start showing up, being like, yo,
I heard there's a ghost here. I heard there's a
ghost witch. Can we see the ghost witch? I want
to see a ghost witch?
Speaker 3: Send thet traction. Yeah, I mean, think of all the
ripley's believe it or not, that you've come across in
your life, you always want to make a stop.
Speaker 4: So basically, this guy, he's like, I have a great
idea for to make us all a shit ton of money.
I'm gonna say that there's a ghost in my house.
You come over and corroborate it for me. Yeah, we
both set up a stall charge five charge and nickel
to come in and check out the ghost house. Yeah,
we're gonna be and.
Speaker 1: You're you're a preacher, so people will believe you.
Speaker 3: The other side of the coin where it's like, oh
that staying looks like the Virgin Mary, there's no we
got a devil.
Speaker 4: He's like, there's gonna be suckers talking about this house
two hundred years from now.
Speaker 1: Yeah, in ways we can't even imagine idiots getting paid
by all other idiots.
Speaker 3: Saw himself a payday.
Speaker 4: He will come up.
Speaker 1: Hey, people traveled far and wide to come to the
Bell House to see experience.
Speaker 3: Imagine dying on the way to the house.
Speaker 4: I know, right which and now there's more ghosts. Now
there's more haunts, extra nickel.
Speaker 3: So it's actually how they came up with the idea
for corn mazes.
Speaker 4: So people would die and there would.
Speaker 3: Die on the way.
Speaker 1: Then it's finally, No corn maze is haunted at first,
but every cornins is eventually.
Speaker 4: So was that one dumb ass kid? It's lost in there?
Speaker 3: You ever get stuck? Do you ever have an incident
in a corn maze as a child?
Speaker 4: No?
Speaker 3: I never did because you could just walk through the corn.
Speaker 4: Man They yeah, just leave, go in one direction.
Speaker 1: Remember which way you came in?
Speaker 4: Yeah, but that's the whole point is you can't remember
the direction you came in. That's but that's on you. Yeah.
Speaker 3: Someone didn't make a past Cub Scouts. I did, Dude,
I got aout past cup Scouts.
Speaker 1: Did you get back? Do you get up to a
life Scout?
Speaker 4: I never got that high. I did it till eighth
grade and then I was like, I'm done with this.
Speaker 3: Do you have any questionable Scout leaders?
Speaker 4: I didn't come even close to them. I got like
first class, maybe second.
Speaker 3: Class, any leader that might have been a little sketchy.
Speaker 4: No, they were all cool.
Speaker 3: Or did you repress that memory?
Speaker 4: No, no repressed memories.
Speaker 1: I mean I did get here on the boy Scouts. Like,
first off, you were an ultra boy. Calm down, we
were both alter I was.
Speaker 3: I was also a cub scout.
Speaker 1: Yeah, cub scout, but you were a boy scout.
Speaker 3: No, because I lost upon one derby.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean I did get my don't tell Mom
and Dad Merrit badge.
Speaker 1: That was kind of yes, But I had I was,
I had all of my kissing Merrit badges, close mouthed,
open mouth, tongue. Yeah, upside down kissing.
Speaker 4: The spider Man, the Spider Man kissing man.
Speaker 1: Yeah, well it was no, it was they would hold
you upside down and so like your leg and you
would kiss whatever part of them. Yeah, that your head
as they were holding you by your ankles.
Speaker 3: And then also every time I tried it.
Speaker 1: Was always the penis.
Speaker 3: But I tried to start a fire right with the stick,
I always had to have my eyes closed.
Speaker 4: And then you just it would always, you know, it
would get wet for some reason.
Speaker 3: Yeah, never never really sparked the fire.
Speaker 4: It was just but you know, the the the Skotmaster
seemed really excited, like I did start a fire, but he.
Speaker 3: Said I did a good job.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like it's so hot, it's so hot, but
then you open your eyes there's no fire and it's.
Speaker 3: Uh and everyone else got like kind of splinters from
the wood. I never never splinter in my hand, just
the sticky.
Speaker 4: It was a sticky and yeah, that's definitely what it was.
Speaker 1: We've made a.
Speaker 3: Lot of cum jokes today. Well, it's a cum heavy episode.
Speaker 4: I did the people the People, the People Love. One
of the most successful podcasts is called Cumtown.
Speaker 1: Also true, it's not like kind of about history too.
I wouldn't know. I don't know. I don't even like podcasts.
Speaker 3: Uh. He's actually a shame. We do this every day a.
Speaker 1: Little uh So. Ironically, the more people showed up to
see the Ghost, which Witch Ghost, the stronger the Witch
Ghost got, and the like the more attention it was paid,
the louder and stronger it became. At this point with
the Witch Ghost, the bell Witch began just actually beating
the ship out of the belt. Children and also like
tripping adults and stuff like that, like making them fall
down and stuff. At times, or as has happened, its
voice got clearer. At times it would be low and melodic,
like hello, I'm a witch, and other times it would
be like it'll just be shrilling. It's just a fucking weird.
Speaker 3: Out like a normal woman. Am I Right? Guys in
that time of the month which goes have a period.
Speaker 1: You know who you know who never is period? It's
got my master bill.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but he did have he was bipolar. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah,
yeah yeah, he got angry a lot, threatened to kill me,
could tell anyone, Oh no, one will find you in
this forest. Also, I gotta give women credit, man, a
third of their fucking lives. They got to deal with
that shit.
Speaker 1: Period.
Speaker 4: Periods last like a fucking week.
Speaker 3: It's like seven to ten days where just I feel
like it's just fucks with the hormones more than a third, right.
Speaker 1: It's it's not call it it's not half, but i'd
call it a solid forty.
Speaker 3: I want to give them credit because I imagine if
we were just like our testosterone just spiked high, like
you just wanted to fight every every single person that
you can.
Speaker 4: That happens to me every time I eat steak.
Speaker 1: That just shoot. Describing a sixteen year old, you said,
a constant erection, you want to get in fights and ship.
Speaker 3: I was not like that.
Speaker 1: You weren't a lot of people were. I wasn't either.
I mean, well, no constant erection, yes, but there were.
I had so many friends that were just like pure
id like just copure, like fight or fuck to the
point where you're just like you just watch family guy, all.
Speaker 3: Right, but now imagine if that testosterone made you just
in pain at all times, Like, yeah.
Speaker 1: You're people weren't paying to be quick.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it might be true.
Speaker 1: Emotionally, it didn't seem fun.
Speaker 4: They were very much an emotional pain.
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, yeah, I get that now.
Speaker 4: That ship doesn't subside until you're like twenty five in
your frontal lobe develops.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but those people are always just like talking ship,
trying to get in fights, and they're like, oh, Dan,
go ahead.
Speaker 4: They made me.
Speaker 3: Yeah damn, like I'm a pokemon.
Speaker 4: That's not a bad reputation to have, though, the enforcer
of the group.
Speaker 3: It's always the smallest guys that talk the loudest junk.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, yeah, Napoleon complex, even though Napoleon wasn't that
short for the time period.
Speaker 3: The skinniest dudes, I mean.
Speaker 1: Whatever, brah Man, Yeah, I gotta get my fucking button. Shit,
won't fuck you up?
Speaker 3: All right, Dan do it?
Speaker 1: Yeah, don't get him? Did you?
Speaker 3: Sometimes it's like feeding it. I know, it's like feeding
as they keep coming back.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so the apparition the ghost, the witch, the bell
Witch began to speak out loud. They would ask it,
who are you? What do you want? And the voice
would answer, I am a spirit. I was once very happy,
but I have been disturbed. However, believe it or.
Speaker 3: Not, us ghost day what like, they were cool as
a ghost and then they got disturbed.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so the ghost has an explanation for what happened.
The witch the bell Witch. At one point it claimed
that it was uh an Indian and it was at peace, resting,
and the bells disturbed its burial place and then it
was all mucked up after that, and it was like,
but it was a woman's voice, so maybe it was
a woman. But at another time, the witch claimed it
was doing the bidding of a neighbor on a neighboring
farm named Kate Bats and the story. People believed so
much that the bell Witch was often referred to as Kate.
They would call it Kate, even though it was saying
it was It never said it was Kate. It did that.
I worked for Kate. They would just call it Kate, okay,
and it would be and it for shits and gigs
would respond to Kate. They'd be like, hey, Kate, and I'm.
Speaker 4: Like, hell, that's such like a friendly name to give,
like a evil witch.
Speaker 1: Right, Kate?
Speaker 3: Have you back up? Have you also seen the new
thing with natives at this moment where they're saying they
kind of like sprouted from the land and didn't cross
the land bridge. They're claiming not to be Homo sapiens, they.
Speaker 4: Sprouted from the land, like fucking orcs witch.
Speaker 3: Who's saying that TikTok TikTok or twitter. It's just natives
claiming to be like, we have our own creation story.
We don't kind of go with the white man's tail.
Speaker 4: That's fine, that's I mean, that literally goes against everything
science has taught us.
Speaker 1: But great, whatever you want to believe, it's fine. You're wrong.
You could be wrong, Yeah.
Speaker 4: Very right to be wrong, because we all started in
Africa and we walked across the land.
Speaker 1: But not even in Africa. One specific part, yeah, one
tea native part of East Africa.
Speaker 4: And then whether we're the mongoloids, right, were separate, not
the mongoloids, the home where white people were the what
were the white people were called the chromagnons, right, yeah, chromagnons.
Speaker 1: No idea. I think the all Homo sapiens are, but.
Speaker 4: All humans were black. And then in Europe they met
a slightly different species of human, Neanderthal. That's what I'm
looking for, not chromagnon Neanderthal. And then there, yeah, they
were small school people and the humans them out of existence,
and well we kill. But then that's how humans became
white is because they fucked the It's not that's.
Speaker 1: Not how you can't white can't. That's just evolution.
Speaker 4: But the the nfls were very white, and then when
the black humans that made mixed babies and then they
got whiter and whiter.
Speaker 3: No, it's an evolutionary thing, where like if you go
to a cloud of your.
Speaker 4: Spot, right, Like, I'm sure the blood sped it up.
Speaker 1: Though maybe we don't have much Neanderthal in US. It's
mostly just that the black skin was not well, like
pretty much every vitamin D or something like that.
Speaker 3: They're like vitamin D to fishent.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 4: But like most white people have like percent Neanderthal somewhere
in them.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so but that's not that much. Yeah, I know,
especially considering they only died out.
Speaker 4: Like considering I'm like one percent Arabic. I don't look
Arabic at all.
Speaker 3: It's in your eyes.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you have untrustworthy eyes.
Speaker 4: I do have a lot of body hair.
Speaker 1: But you're Italian.
Speaker 4: Yeah that's probably where that's right, Arabic.
Speaker 1: Because you're fucking Sicilian.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Sicily was colonized by the.
Speaker 4: My my last name comes from Bussema, comes from buck
Sema comes from Abu a Sema, which is Arabic for
the man in the castle with the mole.
Speaker 3: See, I thought by just meant man who tries to
get one over at market.
Speaker 4: That's what we're known for now for sure.
Speaker 1: Oh, I actually thought the name meant nine to eleven valor.
Speaker 4: M because hey, he was actually there and I'm not
related to him.
Speaker 3: By the way, I'm familiar with stole nine to eleven val.
Speaker 1: Anyone can play with a hose on nine to eleven.
Speaker 4: He was there. He was breathing in the toxins.
Speaker 3: I thought it was just the dude from the league.
Speaker 1: No, yeah, hooked up with his old ladder or whatever
they call it. Fire. But I don't.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that guy I was shitting on. The guy from
the league pretended to have just barely missed a flight
or whatever.
Speaker 3: Could have been hand.
Speaker 1: He said he worked in the towers, which is super verifiable.
Speaker 3: Yeah, something youhol probably shouldn't lie about it.
Speaker 4: What a fucking clock.
Speaker 1: I wouldn't.
Speaker 3: I mean people don't know this, but I I would
because that was the towers that day.
Speaker 1: Yeah, as of someone who survived nine to eleven, I
resent Steve.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I survived it. I was in elementary school, but
I was in fifth far away from everything, But I survived.
Speaker 3: I was in fifth grade. It could have been me.
Speaker 1: I could have say, we all survived nine eleven.
Speaker 4: We're all nine eleven.
Speaker 3: I mean one of the planes crash in Pennsylvania. It's
my state, right, that could have been that could have
that plane could have fallen anywhere, could have fallen on
the lady.
Speaker 1: He was closer to a plane crash than you were.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I was thirty minutes away from DC.
Speaker 3: I don't think a plane hit the Pentagon.
Speaker 4: Well, I survived a missile, all right, This couldn't landed
anywhere exactly. You could have landed on crossover the country.
Speaker 1: So Kate Bats who the witch claimed she worked for,
and everybody just started calling the witch Kate. Kate Bats
has a fun backstory. She was a neighbor of the Bells,
and she was an outcast in the Red River community
because she was poor and because she did lots of
hard labor on her farm, poor and.
Speaker 4: Apple woman labor. Yeah, gotta be a witch.
Speaker 1: Well exactly. And sure her husband was paralyzed, but that's
no excuse.
Speaker 4: I mean she probably made him paralyzed with her fucking spells.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and her husband was which she essentially her husband
got paralyzed in an accident and she had to run
the farm to keep the family alive. And everyone was
like this or bitch, I don't trust.
Speaker 3: Her at all, And she got more bitter and bitter
with each pass.
Speaker 4: They're like, fuck her, what a time to be alive.
Speaker 1: So also allegedly I was just getting spat on. Yeah,
I guess. She allegedly had a habit of trying to
like impress people. She would she would try to light
up a room, any room she walked into, and people
were just like, oh, god shit, why won't she die?
Why isn't this the one woman who lights up every
room she walks into. Who won't fucking DIEU? So Kate though,
was like, no, I'm not employing a ghost to fuck
with anyone. Leave me alone unless you're gonna laugh at
my jokes and let me dance in the pub or
something like I'm not doing which stuff. And people were like.
Speaker 4: Eh, don't believe you.
Speaker 3: She tried to be agreeable and they're like, no, no,
thank you. Was she an ugly lady?
Speaker 1: Uh? Freak photograph? So I don't know, I.
Speaker 4: Feel like eighteen seventeen everyone was ugly.
Speaker 3: No, but well, yes, this has all the makings of
somebody that's probably.
Speaker 1: Not attractive anyone. This is gonna sound gross, but I
don't care anyone older, Like I guess I'll raise it
up to like nineteen, but like I would say, anyone like,
uh over seventeen probably gets really gross really fast. Like
once the just like softness of childhood, like the teenage
years like totally wears off unless you have acne or something.
Once you get into like straight adulthood. Foul foul.
Speaker 3: BROB didn't even have get set up for that. He
said that on his own merit.
Speaker 1: I'm just fucking saying, dude, because he.
Speaker 3: Said they're too old for them after seventeen.
Speaker 1: First off, look, you go back and look at teenagers
in a yearbook in the fifties. They look a lot
more adult than OW. I can't imagine how a teenager
in the eighteen seven or eighteen seventeen I should say. Look,
I'm just saying, my God, adults mostly had to be gross,
like gross very quickly. Yeah, we're gonna sit in that.
Speaker 3: Yep, Okay, fair enough.
Speaker 1: I'm just saying I'm not saying I'm gonna marry a
four I'm not saying if I would go if I
went back in time, I would marry a fourteen year
old in eighteen seventeen without the right dowry.
Speaker 3: But the Virgin Mary was twelve.
Speaker 1: Yeah, if it's good enough for God? Uh, who am
I just rob?
Speaker 4: He's God does say that the Virgin Mary was twelve?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 4: Mary was What a fucked up detail?
Speaker 3: Uh? Does the Bible say the Versionary was twelve?
Speaker 1: Does the Bible say how old Mary was? Well?
Speaker 3: At least that's what I know.
Speaker 1: The Bible does not specify. Told us that Christian historians
typically estimate she was between fifteen and sixteen years old.
Speaker 3: That's way better. Why did my school tell me.
Speaker 1: Twelve a young woman could become true.
Speaker 4: Betray trying to normalize that.
Speaker 1: Well, twelve was the minimum age for marriage, okay, and
Joseph was yeah, I think your teachers were just like, yeah, twelve,
you can.
Speaker 4: Get legally married at the age of fifteen in Hawaii
and in Wyoming, I think, or Idaho one of those.
Speaker 1: Both of those states makes sense. All three of those
states makes sense. Yeah, Hawaii is people.
Speaker 3: There's a lot of kids missing.
Speaker 1: And the thing about Hawaii that people don't realize is
that because it's so beautiful and exotic, people forget that
it's just a bunch of small town, isolated, isolated as
fuck communities. But it's just very pretty and it gets
lots of visitors, so people are like, it must be
totally normal here.
Speaker 3: It's like the worst education system in the US.
Speaker 4: Boy, worse than Mississippi. Yeah, I don't know about that.
Speaker 3: South Carolina's also up there.
Speaker 4: South Carona is pretty bad, dude. Half that I went
to college there and half the school because they had
a rule at usc half the half the school had
to accept people from the state of South Carolina. See what,
a lot of kids had no business going to college
going there. A great people, but just you know, on
enough different level of education.
Speaker 1: Hawaii, at least, incording this random ranking a found, actually
doesn't do that bad. The worst one, unsurprisingly, is New Mexico.
Speaker 3: That also makes sense that tracks Hawaii is like upper tier. Actually, yeah,
any any place with the reservation is probably not going
to do so hot.
Speaker 1: Or Hawaii is like right in the middle essentially.
Speaker 3: Probably Oklahoma is probably down there.
Speaker 1: Uh, we'll be fine, and.
Speaker 3: It's fine, it's fine. Let's move on.
Speaker 1: Let me just find like five more lists.
Speaker 3: Let's just move on. Yeah.
Speaker 1: So anyway, the spirit started having full conversations.
Speaker 4: Uh.
Speaker 1: It also at one point just to fuck with people,
repeated word for word two different sermons that were given
thirteen miles apart at the exact same time. The Belwitch
was very into religion, so much so that it would
often directly and accurately like to the word quote biblical
text and appeared to enjoy getting in religious arguments with people.
So people would show up and be like all right,
which are you from Satan? Blah blah blah, and quote
some dumb Bible verse and the witch would just be
like rab like Bible verses back and be like the
God's a pussy and like all this.
Speaker 3: Shit, just like she's just like a betrayed nun.
Speaker 1: No, it was a native. I think it was an
Indian that was dead, knew the afterlife, and it's like
this is the real story with God, and you know,
some idiot Methodist or Baptist. It's like, oh no, you
know she was just like I'm fucking here, dude, I'm
on the other side.
Speaker 3: I'm not fully buying this.
Speaker 1: Uh okay, well hang with me.
Speaker 4: You're not. You don't believe they were actually haunted?
Speaker 3: No, I just don't think because I don't either blown
debates with a ghost.
Speaker 1: No, the ghost it was happening.
Speaker 4: Did they charge money for these people?
Speaker 1: I never saw if they charged money or no, And
actually it seems like they didn't based on a detail.
We're going to get to another amusement.
Speaker 3: Maybe some like shadow puppets or.
Speaker 1: That would be witchcraft at the time to make a
shadow there's a dog on the wall. Yeah, you're getting
your slop, your throat split like immediately, like it's not
even no time for hanging. He just the judge Jerry
trial is you saw someone make a dog with the
black dog on the wall.
Speaker 3: Just that man just removed his thumb from his body.
Speaker 1: Yeah this, how do.
Speaker 4: You do it again? I can't remember how to do it.
Speaker 3: I don't care.
Speaker 1: So as another form of entertainment for itself, the witch
would people would visit and the witch would just like
tell him the family's dirty laundry. Would just be like
I saw John tugging on his wiener in the own house,
watch him do it just whatever. I don't know. I
assume it was that, or like did you know that
Betsy through vegetables in the fireplace and like John masturbated again.
Now back John won't stop and Betsy didn't need her
vegetables and John jerked off everywhere. But yeah, it was
it was. She would just just fuck with people all
the time. But it was a disembodied voice. It was
not like a witch sat down at the table and
was like, what do you want to know? It was
a disembodied voice. So people were like, all right, is
this disembodied voice legit? Not everyone was so sure. In
eighteen twenty, a military officer whose last name was also
Bell was in the area and he stayed.
Speaker 3: Oh, this is the invention of the telephone. What the
Bell family?
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, yeah, Alexander Graham.
Speaker 4: Yeah, we had They had a fucking speaker wired into
the house. That's how they got the disembodied voice.
Speaker 3: Alexander Graham Bell. This was actually his kind of prequel
to the telephone.
Speaker 1: Okay, well he was born in Scotland and died in Canada.
Speaker 3: It makes sense.
Speaker 1: And was did he live in America?
Speaker 4: He definitely made take a quick pee break. I got
a stint in my ear.
Speaker 3: I don't want to kidney.
Speaker 1: You got a fucking demon in your wiener. Don't get
it out of here, dude. All right, So this military officer,
John Bell is in the area and he recorded a
he he he was keeping a diary, as everyone I
guess did at the time, and he recorded a conversation
he had staying in a different house. But like it
was just the talk of the town at the time, right. Uh,
there was just like, oh, you know, there's a ghostwitch
at the Bell house up at your name's Bell, right,
So he wrote this little paragraph here but found it interesting.
Bell wrote, rather, a sing singular circumstance was here related
to me. Of a young girl of about fifteen years
of age, residing but three miles from Murphy. A voice
accompanies her which says she should marry a man a neighbor.
Thousands of persons have visited her to hear this voice.
In many instances it will reply to questions put to it.
The visitors have left as little satisfied in their curiosity
as before they heard it. Many are under the impression
that it is ventriloquinism imposed upon the hearers, either by
the girl or her brother, who it seems is generally
in her company. Her family is respectable.
Speaker 3: The kids, So the kids are just doing ventriloquist shit
and I.
Speaker 1: Guess fucking each other up because these kids were getting
the shit kicked out of them and adults were getting
tripped and all this stuff. But it was still a
rumor at the time. This was This was a diary
from eighteen twenty. It was a rumor at the time
that they were like ventriloquent. It was a ventriloquist situation.
So someone will walk in and be like, oh, Betsy,
the witch follows you around. What does the witch think
about Jesus and Betsy would be like.
Speaker 3: Fuck business. So it's as if the kids are possessed
and they're speaking for the witch. No, or they're just
doing it faking out of the side of their mouth,
and these fucking people can't tell that they're doing it. Yes, yeah, yeah,
I could take over the world with maybe like ten people.
Back then you give me ten good men. I'm president
of the world.
Speaker 4: Yeah, the world.
Speaker 3: And Jeff Dunham dude done them in all of his
popp It's we got this.
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So in the Saturday Evening Post in eighteen fifty six,
thirty years after thirty six years after the situation, ventral
equidinism was levied again that accusation. The author claimed that
Joshua Gardener that they were friends with Joshua Gardner, who
is a character in this story. When the ghost was asked,
when the witch was asked how long it would remain
the bell which replied until Joshua Gardener and Betsy Bell
get married, Betsy Bell being the girl who may or
may not have been accused of ventriquinism.
Speaker 3: Which is worse than cast and spells.
Speaker 1: Yeah. The author goes on to state that Betsy Bell
was in love with Joshua Gardner and had learned ventriloquinism. Now,
how a girl in eighteen seventeen Appalachia, Tennessee became a
ventriloquist is a fucking mystery to me. In fact, a
witch seems.
Speaker 3: More likely came across a book what book dark arts
because nobody wants a ventriloquist. It's the worst form of comedy.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a nightmare. It's bad. It's just bad. Common. However,
the author of the definitive book.
Speaker 3: Although you do look like a ventriloquist doll.
Speaker 4: Ha, we gotta really bring this the one from Goosebumps. Yeah,
that that shit gave me nightmares. Now it's coming back.
Speaker 1: That was a t FM comment.
Speaker 4: Because there's probably Dan pretending to be do you know.
Speaker 3: The I did have a burner that I would just
troll rob with.
Speaker 1: Do you do you know the dummies name? Because I
do because I watched the Goosebumps movie two.
Speaker 4: It's Robbie right. No, oh, slappy slappy do that that doll?
Speaker 3: Maybe we do an entire episode where I'm behind you
with my hand and I'm.
Speaker 1: Just like, yeah, I gotta watch the YouTube for that
YouTube dot com slash sophtcore history. So the author of
the definitive book about the Bell which wrote in his book, no,
that work, you gotta really you gotta put.
Speaker 4: Here, I'll do the voice, you do the hand.
Speaker 1: You gotta put your hand in my pants be a pro. No, no, right,
all the way and just right up my ass dude.
Speaker 3: That was Jimmy.
Speaker 1: Fuck. If he dies, then I swear to God.
Speaker 3: Oh no, yeah, I broke the friend.
Speaker 1: We're just giving up on the bit now if he dies,
and Dan wouldn't put his hand up my asshole because
I broke the frame. Not nearly far enough anyway. The
author of the definitive book about the Bell Witch wrote
uh that the ventrilo Ventriloquist charges were total bullshit, and
he had like proof of it too. So, oh man,
this whole thing is broken.
Speaker 4: You guys like Jimmy. Huh.
Speaker 1: I want to bet that Jimmy.
Speaker 4: He was the last guy to tax the rich.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but he lived to be one hundred that was
the whole thing. He also But yeah, if he dies,
this is kind of on us.
Speaker 1: It is one hundred cents a deregulated beer. Yeah, micro
brewing is because of Jimmy.
Speaker 4: Fuck yeah, Jimmy, that's that's pretty baller.
Speaker 3: Damn, I'm gonna have to get a new friend.
Speaker 1: Fuck. Well, shit happens Jimmy's dead anyway, it actually dies,
that would be spooky. The author of the main book
about it, Broady Dead, in the book that the ventriloquism
stuff was bullshit to the point where one of the
family members threatened to sue for libel the Saturday Evening
Post and they immediately retracted and everyone was like, no,
Betsy was way too young to like do ventriloquialism. Like,
there's no fucking way that she was able to pull
that off.
Speaker 4: Definitely a demon.
Speaker 3: Rob fox down another woman? What believing women?
Speaker 1: Yeah, do you know what what? No, I am believing
the woman?
Speaker 3: What you don't believe in her abilities as a venge?
Speaker 1: Oh? Yeah, fair enough? So finally, how could she ever
do this? There's no fucking way.
Speaker 4: So if you don't have.
Speaker 3: Tests to be witchcraft.
Speaker 1: Finally the people were like, all right, we're gonna test.
We're gonna test the witch. We're gonna figure this out.
So John Johnson uh son of James the guy who
Stayed the Night or whatever, devised a test for the witch. Something.
He he decided to ask the witch something that no
one outside of his family would know. And so he
asked the witch. He goes, so I have a Dutch
step grandmother in North Carolina, okay, And the witch was
like okay, and he was like, can you tell me
what my Dutch step grandmother in North Carolina says to
her slaves when they fuck up? That was posed to
the witch. If the Witch gets it right, oddly specific,
it's hyper specific. What is my what is my grandma?
Who's not related to me, who's from who's fucking Dutch
say to slaves?
Speaker 3: I thought the Dutch were anti slavery.
Speaker 1: Not the ones in America? Yeah, mabe, the ones in
the other ones or whatever. So the Witch replies, in
his grandmother's accent, hut, what has happened now? So I
guess that's what his fucking Dutch grandma said to slaves.
Speaker 3: That was a common phrase back then.
Speaker 1: Well she stuck, she stuck the landing on it.
Speaker 3: Yeah, everyone was saying that, man.
Speaker 1: Everyone was saying not, hut, what has happened now?
Speaker 4: That seems like a fairly nicer thing to say to
a slave than I would imagine them saying.
Speaker 3: Right.
Speaker 1: Yeah, walking at me like, hey, guys, what happened?
Speaker 4: What's going on here? It would probably be a little
meaner than that, is what I would imagine.
Speaker 1: In another account, an englishman stopped by the house because
you wanted to see what was going on, and he
just mentioned, you know, his family lives back in England,
and the witch overhears him and just starts mimicking his parents,
and she's like, oh yeah from England, no right, And
the guy's like, oh, my fucking god, that's my parents'
voices to a fucking tea Jesus and he's like, wow,
that's crazy. I'm gonna go to sleep. So he goes
to sleep and he's woken in the morning and again
they're like, oh, Joan, wake up like his parents. Hears
his parents' voices gonna, oh, don't igt about ith b B.
He's like, good lord, my parents' voices woke me up,
but no one's here. The witch is real, Sorry for doubting,
and he fucking leaves. He's like, the witch is one
hundred percent, which is real. So the Witch becomes so notorious.
The Bell Witch becomes so notorious that one man who
feared absolutely nothing decided he needed to see this demon
for himself. The year is eighteen twenty. Do you know
who this man was?
Speaker 3: A blankoln close.
Speaker 4: You this is that's great, Robert E.
Speaker 3: Lee. I'm gonna think earlier Quincy Adams.
Speaker 4: Closer he was Quincy Adams was dead by now, right.
Speaker 3: No, he wasn't.
Speaker 1: Adams was close to Dad. Quincy was well alive.
Speaker 3: Quincy, he was hunting.
Speaker 1: Come on, fear on earth, feared no one.
Speaker 3: Feared, no One. Eighteen twenties Teddy Roosevelt.
Speaker 4: Davy Crockett, he would know that, would not be Teddy Roosevelt.
Speaker 1: Andrew mother fuck Jackson. Jackson shows up to the farm, says,
show me this fucking witch. He owned property in the county.
He's like, I hear those witch in town.
Speaker 3: Andrew Jackson's kind of a mix between Donald Trump and
Nick Cage.
Speaker 1: Andrew Jackson is Donald Trump, If Donald Trump did the
stuff that Donald Trump said, if he was about that life, Yeah,
Donald Trump's not about that life. Andrew Jackson was was
that life? And one wants to come at me like whoa,
no go read one fucking sentence about Andrew Jackson.
Speaker 3: No, my man was king of New Orleans.
Speaker 1: The answer is fucking no. Has done like no.
Speaker 3: Shot a couple of times.
Speaker 1: I understand that. I understand that a pieceful bullet hit
Donald Trump's ear. Andrew Jackson took one to the chest
and then killed the guy who did it, well, nearly
killed him. No, he killed the guy.
Speaker 3: No, he beat him with a cane.
Speaker 1: Different guy. No, that guy didn't shoot him. That guys.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, that's right. Miss, It just didn't backfired.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah in the duel though, that's right, Andrew Jackson
took one to the chest and then pulled out his guy.
Speaker 3: I forgot old Hickory has a couple of bullets in him.
Speaker 1: No, he's only got one bullet in him.
Speaker 3: I thought he had a couple from the services.
Speaker 1: He also got slashed in the face as an eleven
year old trying to fight a British soldier. That's right,
took a sword to the fucking face.
Speaker 3: So again, but the bullet from the duel is launched
in forever.
Speaker 1: Don't come at me with anyone being as hard as
Andrew Jackson, certainly not any modern president.
Speaker 3: And listen, did he wipe out a couple Indians, Yeah,
a couple million, But he also took one in.
Speaker 1: He did adopt one, and that counts for twenty at
least he raised.
Speaker 3: One as his own.
Speaker 1: Yeah. So, some of the Bell children allegedly had served
under Jackson when he was a general. And Jackson, like
I said, own land not far from the Bell homestead.
So the Bell household at the time because of all
the visitors and stuff who may or may not have
been paying I don't really know, strained from resources either way.
So Jackson was like, you know what, I know the
Bells and I want to meet. I want to see
this witch to see if it's real. I'm going to
bring a wagon full of supplies to help the Bells
out because they served honorably under me and I'm a
good guy. Blah blah blah. So Jackson and his soldiers
and the wagon start to get near the bell farm,
and the.
Speaker 3: Wagon all along the bell tower, watchtower, the bell tower.
Speaker 1: Calm down, Bob Dylan or Jimmy Hendrix. I don't know
who did it first.
Speaker 4: Bob don't did it first.
Speaker 3: Just assume Bob Dylan wrote I.
Speaker 1: Like the Dave Matthews Band version of the Best, So
no Jimmy Hendricks version all the way.
Speaker 3: That's the Watchdower. But that all on the bell tower
or the bell tower is also a different song.
Speaker 1: I don't know that one. How can you be all
along a belltower fucking it's tiny?
Speaker 3: Well, it's not sick. All along the bell tower is
not a song.
Speaker 1: Uh. Anyway, the wagon's walking up or driving up whatever,
and it just fucking comes to a halt. The horses
are like nope, and the wagon just gets stuck. And Jackson, actually,
I'm sorry. The horses aren't like nope. The wagon gets
stuck in a way that it does not make sense,
like it's not in mud or anything like that. It
just won't move anymore. It just will not move, as
if it's bewitched into a fixed stop. And Jackson and
his men get out and they try to push, and
the horses try to pull and nothing. It is just
will not move. And Jackson exclaims, by the by the
Eternal Boys, it is the witch. And this is my favorite,
one of my favorite parts of me. A Allegedly, a
quote unquote metallic voice was heard from the bushes. I
don't maybe you can do this in post. It's just like,
all right, general, let the wagon move on. I will
see you again tonight, M and the and the wagon
moves immediately.
Speaker 4: And Andrew Jackson corroborates this story. He said, this happened.
Speaker 1: Uh no, we don't have it from Jackson first hand.
This is all secondhand info, okay, but super legit. And
obviously Jackson and his men stay in the Bell House
that night to experience the witch. One of the guys, I.
Speaker 3: Bet Jackson's trying to have an orgy with the ghost.
Speaker 1: Jackson do all kinds of fun up, there's no question.
Speaker 3: I mean when he got into the White House, they
had like a seven day, week long party.
Speaker 4: That's awesome.
Speaker 3: People were shitting in the White House, just like on
the floor. That's people were fucking in the halls.
Speaker 1: Damn, you cannot, under any circumstances elect a person from
Tennessee to the White House.
Speaker 3: He'll bring everyone, He'll bring the entire state.
Speaker 1: Not it's I mean, they were screaming Rocky Top before
it was even a thing. Yeah, just butt fucking and
screaming Rocky Top.
Speaker 3: What a good old time?
Speaker 1: No, no Rocky Top. So one of Jackson's men, one
of the soldiers, who was obviously like not a big
shot or whatever, like the wouldn't an officer or anything,
I don't think, uh, just some underling, uh, claimed he
was like, I'm not scared of this fucking witch. In fact,
I brought a silver bullet that I've loaded in my pistol,
and I call this bullet the witch Tamer.
Speaker 3: Silver kill witches.
Speaker 1: Who could say rightwolves and vampires too.
Speaker 4: Vampires are critical fixes and garlic.
Speaker 1: Silver also, silver will fuck him up.
Speaker 4: I think get silver.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, silver is in general and anti supernatural situation.
Speaker 4: Yeah, because in the Witcher video games you use the
silver sword for all the monsters and the steel sword
for humans.
Speaker 3: It's like Valerian steel.
Speaker 1: A silver will cut through a vampire, no problem, gets
straight up, turns the ash. You don't even you swing
and you don't feel anything.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like going through leaves.
Speaker 1: So one of Jackson's men, like I said, he's like,
you don't my fuck switch up. I got a silver bullet.
I call it the witch Tamer. In fact, I'm a
witch layer. I've killed other witches. Jackson just gets tired
of hearing this guy.
Speaker 3: Fucking talk, fucking puts one in his head.
Speaker 1: I wish he Jackson says, by the eternals, I do
wish the thing would come. I want to see him
run like he's like, I don't believe this guy. This
guy's a bitch. I want to see this witch come
out and make make him look like a pussy. Uh.
Soon after, the witch arrived and said to the witch Slayer,
because she's like, all right, shoot me, you can even
where am I fucking shoot me? Uh? I guess maybe
she even appeared because the man like points at where
the voice was gun won't fire, and the witch countered,
I'll teach literally quote, I'll teach you a lesson. Beat
the shit out of the guy, grabbed him by his
nose and threw him.
Speaker 3: Out of the house by the nose.
Speaker 1: You say, yeah, Jackson exclaimed again by the eternal boys,
I never saw so much fun in all my life.
This beats fighting the British.
Speaker 4: Oh my gosh.
Speaker 1: The witch told Jackson she would uncover another rascal the
next night, but in the morning Jackson's men were like,
let's leave because I don't know who she means, and
I don't want to get fucked up, so let's just
get the fuck out of here. And they did. But
some people are not so sure that Jackson was there.
According to one historian that it quote the eighteen twenty
four presidential election was so malicious and seeing it seems
hard to believe that his opponent would have overlooked the
opportunity to drag him through the mud for losing a
fight to a witch.
Speaker 3: That's Quincy, right, yeah, Because Quincy won the first election,
and then Jackson and him were just mudslinging.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It was a dirty, dirty election.
But maybe the best argument that this was a real
spirit that wants a human was that.
Speaker 3: And you would think Quincy would be about that life too,
because he had his own weird shit. So maybe that's
why he didn't go after the wins.
Speaker 1: Get yelled at for more people. You don't want to
open the.
Speaker 3: Mill going to the center of the earth hollow.
Speaker 1: You don't want that smoke.
Speaker 3: Yeah, which you know he didn't necessarily believe in it,
but he hung around people that did believe in it.
Speaker 1: Right, be best not to open that door.
Speaker 3: M hm.
Speaker 1: So the spirit was pretty clicky and played favorites with
the Bell family. The spirit really liked John Bell's wife, Lucy,
calling her quote the most perfect woman to walk the earth.
The witch would give Lucy fresh fruit and sing hymns
to her.
Speaker 3: Was she trying to clap the cheeks?
Speaker 1: Fucking? Maybe the witch also liked John Bell Junior, showed her,
showed him some respect, But holy fuck, did the witch
hate John Bell Senior, the owner of the farm. The
witch was quoted as saying, the disembodied voice of the
witch was quoted as saying, mister Bell is a bad man.
Speaker 3: It's probably crumudget.
Speaker 1: I think he was kind of a dick. Yeah, as
far as I could. I don't know what. She called him,
old Jack, And the witch claimed that she intended to
kill him.
Speaker 3: Oh man, why couldn't she?
Speaker 1: Well?
Speaker 3: And he made of silver.
Speaker 1: In eighteen seventeen, when she first showed up, John Bell
Sor came down with a neurological disorder that got worse
and worse over the next several years, and according to legend,
every time John Bell Senor would suffer gravely from this
neurological disorder, the Witch could be heard laughing at him
as he was just like. The witch was like, fuck you,
Oh man.
Speaker 3: I like that though it's long term. You have a rival.
Speaker 4: She wants them to suffer for a long time.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, you don't make it painless. So John Bell
building up that rivalry or that enemy, that true, unadulterated
like pure passion and hate, that pure hatred. There's something
to that.
Speaker 1: Keeps you going.
Speaker 3: And I'm sure they like I know, he probably a
little piece of him enjoyed this.
Speaker 1: You think it kept him going?
Speaker 3: I think so. They's just a little bit of a
spie fuel Well.
Speaker 1: He died in eighteen twenty, on December nineteenth, at the
age of seventy.
Speaker 3: Though, yeah, I don't think it was the witch.
Speaker 1: Well John Bell Junior if his son found poison next
to his dad's bed, and the witch is believed to
a poison Bell and reportedly laughed and sang at his deathbed.
Speaker 3: I thought Junior was cool.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Junior was cool. She killed Senior.
Speaker 4: So somebody literally murdered this man with poison over a
long period of time.
Speaker 1: No, no, no, it was immediate, like he had a
neurological disorder. But then one day she was just like,
I'm done with you. I put some poison, okay, or
the bell Witches said to it.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's sucking. The joker just finally pulling out the
gun and shooting Batman in the head.
Speaker 1: Yep, So she said that the Bell Witch was quoted
as saying she fixed him, and I did it, and
he will not get up. She also ruined his funeral
by singing really raunchy drinking songs. Says they're trying to
be like the Lord, We'll protect us. She was just
like a five counts for every point five points for
every con.
Speaker 3: She seems like a good time, right, Yeah, this switch
is dope.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, that's hardcore.
Speaker 1: In eighteen twenty one, at the Behest of the Witch,
Betsy Bell called off her engagement to none other than
Joshua Gardner. So the woman that Betsy, the band that
Betsy was in love with. The engagement was called off
at the Behest of the Witch, and Betsy was once
accused of being using ventriloquinism to convince I guess Joshua
Gardner to marry her.
Speaker 4: Why did they not move at any point?
Speaker 3: Don't let the terrorists win, right, you don't.
Speaker 1: You don't give it a terrorists. And also, uh respect,
it had to be easier back then. But let me
tell you, man, selling property sucks.
Speaker 3: Ass. You think it's easy to just fucking pick up
everything you have.
Speaker 1: There's a level.
Speaker 4: There's a level of new, build a new cabin somewhere else.
Speaker 1: There's a level of ghost I would deal with in
my current house.
Speaker 3: And she doesn't sound that bad, So she sounds kind
of like a an. It's an entertaining thing. Right, you
don't have TV, you don't have radio yet, right, right,
like your last pretty much, but this is kind of refreshing.
You know, you have something to do. It keeps you occupied,
new people every day.
Speaker 1: Yeah, the entity the Witch told the family it was
gonna leave but return in seven years. In eighteen twenty one,
the Witch returned in time for Lucy and her sons
Richard and Joel to fuck with them. They were doing
similar right, she was doing similar shit. She is said
to have spoken to John Junior for three nights about quote,
the past, present, and future, but the family was like
knowing what they knew the time around, which is like
the more we got into.
Speaker 3: It, the ghost of Christmas past.
Speaker 1: Yeah, she was like, I'm about the not I gonna
tell you about it now. Now we'n tell you about
the future, three nights in a row. But the family knew.
They were like, dude, the more we lean into her shit,
the more she gets stronger. So let's just fucking ignore
and see what happens.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And like any good bully, just ignore it.
Speaker 1: She went away. She said she would. She said she
would return to John Bell's most direct descendant one hundred
and seven years later, in nineteen thirty five. There are
no tales from nineteen thirty five that exist, but there
are tales from more recently, oh from the Belle family
Jordan Bell Lucy Butler Nay Bell is a direct descendant
of John Bell Junior and is named for John Bell's wife, Lucy,
John Bell Senior's wife Lucy. She has said that her daughter,
she and her daughter Jennifer, have seen the black rabbit
had a dog, and that they often saw much like
Betsy originally saw a giggling girl running around their house
at night. She said quote, I was thinking that might
have been the Bell Witch. That would have been the
sweet side of her. The little girl would play with
Jennifer's toys, and the family dog was not afraid of her.
She stayed, would come out at night, and she was
sweet and giggled. She would watch over Jennifer. Ah. Yeah, However,
the Bell Witch was still antagonistic to members of the
Bell family that were dix. I guess you could say
the Bell Witch specifically did not like Lucy's father, who
was apparently a smooth talking, good looking actor in Memphis
who had some involvement with the Florida Mafia. Whoever that
is you know what I mean, why the Florida Mafia.
Speaker 3: Is no the Jews, Jews.
Speaker 4: And what time period is this, this.
Speaker 1: Is now, This is from the last in the last
forty years, Oh, the last forty years, yeah, Butler, or
maybe fifty years, but either way. Lucy Butler recalls one
incident in which she was a child and her dad
was about to host a party at their house. Her
dad had recently purchased a I guess the last six years,
recently purchased like a brand new stereo system, which was
the nineteen sixties. This is like a luxury this is
like incredible things, fucking new Xbox situation. And he was
about to have this big party and show office brand
new stereo system. You're like, look, look how rich I am.
It's definitely not Florida Mafia money that got me this.
When they walked into the music room, there were thousands
of crickets in there, holy shit, and they flooded the stereo.
They ran into the stereo system and ruined it. Jesus
Butler's husband, Larry Butler, was skeptical of the story at first,
but then he drove out and he was like, and
he's a Christian, so he's like, I'm gonna drive out
to the Bell Farm with the Bible and confront this
fucking witch. I'm gonna go over to the cave that's
there and confront it, but the cave was closed, and
he was like he tried a tough guy, and he's like,
I'm glad it was because on a Bible I would
have fucking would have fucking done it. But he did
say that the witch haunted their house. Later. Uh, and
to this day, Lucy's like, I believe in it that
I've seen. I saw the things that happened. I was there.
It's not bullshit, blah blah blah. That is the story
of the Bell Witch, on whom the Blair Witch is.
Speaker 3: BA doesn't really sound the witch is the Blair Witch.
Speaker 1: You know, it's just a witch. In Appalachia. Sometimes you
take liberties.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean this witch just kind of seemed bored.
Speaker 1: Just I think the witch mostly like to fuck with people.
Speaker 3: Which I would do if I was dead and cursed
to run the land for eternity.
Speaker 1: Yeah, especially if some want to wake you up. Yeah.
Speaker 3: Uh, hitler is I want to say the old guy
who's today tailor the man that bought the land.
Speaker 1: John Belr.
Speaker 3: Yeah, just like you couldn't get it up. I mean
everyone else got seemingly got on her good side. Why
couldn't he reach an agreement? He was kind of the
piece offering, well she he did. The witch did fuck
with Betsy.
Speaker 1: For a while.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but they became agreeable.
Speaker 1: I guess she did stab Betsy a lot and scratch
Betsy and hit Betsy.
Speaker 3: She's taking out some aggression. No, she's just picking on
a smaller child, spooky ship.
Speaker 1: Who's today Hitler Busch?
Speaker 4: Yeah, i'd say the dad because he or the elder? Yeah, dad, he.
Speaker 3: Actually you know what the Hitler today is the ghost
that went up Penis.
Speaker 4: Yeah, don't call him that. I actually spear. Respect you, Dwende.
I respect you. They just want to be acknowledged, Yes,
the DWND. They just want to be acknowledged. They just
telling me about to pee there. You know the guy, uh,
the President's son who told us to you know, let
the spirit know before you pee on the bush. He
said that he would wake up with scratches on his
face every night. Every morning, he'd wake up with scratches
on his face. He tells his grandma about it. She says, oh,
that's just a dwen dey. You gotta just say before
you go to bed, say, I see you a duende
And then he did, and then the scratches stopped. Scratches stopped.
He says, I got that dunde on my shoulder right now.
He was believe in this, like he was like dead serious.
I was like, oh shit, what up one day? But
uh yeah, the dwn they just want to be acknowledged.
I think that's uh how they work.
Speaker 1: Which was a dwende? And what do we learned today?
That something?
Speaker 4: I mean, she got a lot of acknowledgment and she
didn't let up.
Speaker 1: Though, yeah she got nothing. It made it worse.
Speaker 4: Yeah, So no, she's a different kind of different kind
of spirit.
Speaker 3: Would you learn to I learned that it's good to
have something like you have a daily activity or like
a daily nemesis. I think it's good to have a
daily nemesis to make life more interesting.
Speaker 1: Haters make the grinders grind.
Speaker 3: Yeah, growth up. That's how you kind of you know,
get above everyone else in this life. That's how you
get a step ahead.
Speaker 1: Create.
Speaker 3: I mean, even if like no one's actually out to
get you or out to you know, put you down,
create that person, whether it's through invent them, ventral quizt
dolls like Rob, Yeah, or an evil spirit. Your wife
doesn't love you from the Appalachian Mountain respect. You gotta
write harder, maybe a combination of both.
Speaker 4: The writing is the gayst part about you.
Speaker 3: That's wine.
Speaker 1: I don't love You've got to write even harder.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so find somebody you're not funny to direct all
your energy and hate towards. Be petty. Petty is full
and grind hard. Baby.
Speaker 1: What'd you learn to?
Speaker 4: I learned that uh uh, Andrew Jackson is a badass.
I guess I already knew that he likes to say.
Speaker 1: By the eternals, yea, by the eternal, by the eternal.
Speaker 4: I learned that people in the eighth in eighteen seventeen
are fucking stupid.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I learned that again. I could conquer the world
I've done.
Speaker 4: We could, for people, very easily take over the world.
We wouldn't even need a smartphone without.
Speaker 3: A single bullet thrown into the air.
Speaker 1: With that. For Danner, Jester and our special guest Alex
BISHEMI thank you for being on.
Speaker 4: Of course, man, I'm always down to come on. I
hope your iners are better, Yeah, they're getting better, slowly,
but surely.
Speaker 3: I am Rob Fox, you just gutsaw ser