Speaker 1: It's Night Side with Dan Ray on Boston's Radio.
Speaker 2: I'm stunned that Nicole did not mention Alex Bergman. Are
Speaker 2: you still in the studio, Nicole, Oh, yes, I'm here.
Speaker 2: High Alex Bergman.
Speaker 3: You know I should have mentioned that. I'm sorry. Yes,
Speaker 3: another big deal.
Speaker 2: Last question it to you is when will we have
Speaker 2: the duck boats rolling this This is going to be
Speaker 2: the year.
Speaker 3: I cannot wait. Frankly, I think we're overdue. And I
Speaker 3: know that's a little pompous to say, but it's only
Speaker 3: been what one two years?
Speaker 2: This is seven years. That's why.
Speaker 3: Well for the Red Sox of course, but just in general,
Speaker 3: you know, we can't go too long without they get Russell.
Speaker 2: I'm going to do when they when they win it
Speaker 2: all this year, I'm going to rent a duck boat
Speaker 2: for you and me and we'll join the parade.
Speaker 3: I love that. Yes, let's do it. I'll bring one
Speaker 3: of those really obnoxious horns just because.
Speaker 2: Yes, oh at absolute compulsory. Absolutely yes, absolutely, have a
Speaker 2: good show. Thanks very much. Hi, Welcome in everybody. My
Speaker 2: name is Dan Ray, the host of Nightside, celebrating Alex
Speaker 2: Bergman signing with the Red Sox for three years that
Speaker 2: great signing. Great signing. Congratulations the Red Sox. They are
Speaker 2: they are alive and kicking. We have a very interesting
Speaker 2: show tonight. We're going to tell you all about your taxes.
Speaker 2: Mark Misselbeck is going to be here CPA extraordinary answer
Speaker 2: all your question about taxes. And then it looks like
Speaker 2: maybe maybe the city Boston is going to do a
Speaker 2: little bit of reassessment about some of the bus lanes
Speaker 2: and bike lanes. Oh that they would. We'll get to
Speaker 2: all of that. But we have four really interesting guests
Speaker 2: coming up tonight during the eight o'clock hour. Again, my
Speaker 2: name is Dan Ray. Rob Brooks is back in the
Speaker 2: control room, and I want to start off with the
Speaker 2: story of a hockey player place for Endicott College the Goals.
Speaker 2: His name is Jack Smiley. He has a very special
Speaker 2: game coming up this weekend. Jack, Welcome to Nightside. How
Speaker 2: are you, sir.
Speaker 4: Man, Thank you for having me. I'm doing well. I'm
Speaker 4: doing great. It's an honor to be and vice it
Speaker 4: on Well.
Speaker 2: I'll tell you I wanted to talk with you. We
Speaker 2: also have your coach RJ. Tolin with us, the head
Speaker 2: hockey coach varsity men's hockey hockey coach at Endicott. This
Speaker 2: is quite a story.
Speaker 5: R J.
Speaker 6: This is great. Thanks so much for having us on.
Speaker 6: And I'd just like to say that the Red Sox
Speaker 6: had me back even before Bregman when they sent Bobby
Speaker 6: doll Back back down to the minors.
Speaker 2: Dollback probably hit forty five home runs for the White
Speaker 2: Sox and saying why can we get players like that? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, anyway,
Speaker 2: Let's let me Jack explain what happened to you. You're
Speaker 2: a young hockey player. You're a freshman I think at
Speaker 2: Endicott College in February of twenty twenty two, just about
Speaker 2: three years ago, and you're at a team practice and
Speaker 2: you inexplicably suffered a stroke. Tell us about it.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, it was actually in my sophomore year, but okay,
Speaker 4: it was in that February of twenty twenty two time frame,
Speaker 4: and I had come into the school during COVID, so
Speaker 4: we didn't really have a very normal freshman year at all.
Speaker 4: And early on in that sophomore year I ended up
Speaker 4: having a stroke on the ice for practice, and that
Speaker 4: really changed the trajectory of my life. Put me on
Speaker 4: a completely different collegiate journey than I ever thought I
Speaker 4: would be on I woke up in the hospital on
Speaker 4: February twenty second, completely paralyzed on my right side. I
Speaker 4: couldn't talk normally. It was very inaudible and incomprehensible. I
Speaker 4: was now relearning things that I learned at the ripe
Speaker 4: age of two years old, and going from a twenty
Speaker 4: two year old ncuble collegiate athlete. That's quite a whirlwind.
Speaker 4: So three years so you may road to recover.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you have made a remarkable recovery, coach. What's gonna happen? Uh,
Speaker 2: he's on the ice. I guess Saturday, Saturday night? Are
Speaker 2: you guys at home or away? I know Ray Books?
Speaker 2: The rink up there is named after my Friday book?
Speaker 2: Are you a Homer? Away? On Saturday night?
Speaker 6: Saturday afternoon, we're home with all the seniors and Jack
Speaker 6: And yeah, they'll they'll all be They'll all be out
Speaker 6: there and and I'll play Jack as well.
Speaker 2: Now, is this Jack's first actual game back?
Speaker 6: This will be his his He's he's been on on
Speaker 6: the ice for the season, you know, kind of fully
Speaker 6: making his way back into things, and this will be
Speaker 6: his first first game back since since what happens Yeah.
Speaker 2: And who who you guys playing on Saturday afternoon. I
Speaker 2: didn't realize was an afternoon game.
Speaker 6: John to Wales.
Speaker 2: All right, okay, Jack, I know you must be pretty
Speaker 2: excited about Saturday. You this is not the final game
Speaker 2: of the season, so hopefully there'll be a few more
Speaker 2: opportunities to get out there and put the puck up
Speaker 2: behind the goaltenders. Uh. There has to be a little
Speaker 2: bit of a thought in the back of your head though,
Speaker 2: of am I Am I going to be able to
Speaker 2: do it? Or maybe not? Is it? Is it kind
Speaker 2: of a bittersweet feeling coming up as you approach Saturday.
Speaker 2: We've still got, you know, obviously a couple of days
Speaker 2: between now and then to think about it. Yeah.
Speaker 4: No, it's definitely a whirlwind of emotion for sure, And
Speaker 4: I really try very heavily. Something I've learned throughout the
Speaker 4: entire journey is to focus so directly and so heavily
Speaker 4: on the day you're in and what you can do
Speaker 4: that day to make for a better tomorrow. So I've
Speaker 4: been trying to keep out those emotions as as much
Speaker 4: as I can so they don't become overwhelming. But there
Speaker 4: is definitely that inkling starting to creep in of it's
Speaker 4: real now, it's it's coming up. The opportunities here, and yeah,
Speaker 4: with being out for so long and going through such
Speaker 4: a such a dramatic event and such a real, serious,
Speaker 4: life altering occurrence, there are definitely those thoughts of what's
Speaker 4: going to happen. But I'm just telling myself, I'm scoring
Speaker 4: a couple of goals, I'm putting someone through the glass,
Speaker 4: and Coach is playing me every game after that.
Speaker 2: You sound like a hockey player, that is for sure. Now, Coach,
Speaker 2: I know that you've got a great student body up there.
Speaker 2: I've been on your campus many times, particularly before the pandemic.
Speaker 2: We used to do shows from when Doc Wiley was
Speaker 2: the president of Endicott College. I suspect you'll have a
Speaker 2: full house Saturday afternoon with students and family and friends.
Speaker 6: Yeah, it's a it's a great community, and I think,
Speaker 6: especially with you know, the kind of unique occasion, I
Speaker 6: would think it will be a pretty lively crowd, be
Speaker 6: a great, great event.
Speaker 2: And I assume I assume the medical staff is clear,
Speaker 2: Jack and whatever it was, whatever the the the accident was,
Speaker 2: or the the the impact, whatever caused this this situation. Uh,
Speaker 2: I'm sure that the medical staff has looked at him
Speaker 2: pretty clearfulrect.
Speaker 6: Yeah, the more time you'll you would spend talking with Jack,
Speaker 6: I'm sure he would say, well, don't worry about me.
Speaker 6: You should make sure the people at Johnson and Wales
Speaker 6: are medically cleared to play against me.
Speaker 2: Uh, sounds like a hockey player. How's the team doing
Speaker 2: this year, coach? Where what's the what's the status of
Speaker 2: the goals?
Speaker 7: Uh?
Speaker 6: I think they're doing this. It's a great, great group
Speaker 6: of kids and where you know, I think they can.
Speaker 6: I think it's a special year. Any year you feel
Speaker 6: like as a coach you can beat anyone in the country.
Speaker 6: So and I truly feel like that. And I enjoy
Speaker 6: going in there every day. And part of it starts
Speaker 6: with being able to spend every day with someone like Jack,
Speaker 6: you know, with the example he sets and how he's
Speaker 6: persevered through everything he's been through, and you know it's
Speaker 6: he's given us all so much.
Speaker 5: You know.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, well Jack, you know best best of luck.
Speaker 2: Hockey is a great game. I have a great friend
Speaker 2: of young guy named Matt Brown who unfortunately got badly
Speaker 2: injured even worse than you did, playing high school hockey.
Speaker 2: And he's in a book called Line Change, and you
Speaker 2: may want to pick that up. It's pretty inspirational. Great guy,
Speaker 2: and you sound like a great guy. You're going to
Speaker 2: stay with hockey after your career. Do you have some
Speaker 2: aspirations to coach or anything like that?
Speaker 4: Jack, I don't know exactly what the future holds after
Speaker 4: I graduate. I've been so focused on getting back on
Speaker 4: the ice and dialed in on getting back on the
Speaker 4: sheet and making it the best I can that I
Speaker 4: haven't really thought it much else. So We'll see where
Speaker 4: the road takes me. But I'm not counting it out.
Speaker 4: I love the game of hockey. It's given me so
Speaker 4: much that I could definitely see myself trying to get
Speaker 4: back give back to it in some capacity.
Speaker 2: Well, Jack, best of luck you. Sounds like you're lucked
Speaker 2: and loaded ready to go. Best of luck Saturday afternoon, coach,
Speaker 2: Best to you and the Gulls for the rest of
Speaker 2: the season. Say hi to all our friends at Endicott College.
Speaker 2: And what time is that game? We have a lot
Speaker 2: of listeners up obviously north through whom I assume there
Speaker 2: might be a few tickets still available.
Speaker 6: I hope kids, it's three o'clock on Saturday afternoon.
Speaker 2: All Right, beautiful rink named in honor of Ray bark
Speaker 2: Y balk the great Bruins defensemen, and also Stanley Cup
Speaker 2: winning with the Colorado Avalanche. Gentlemen. Thanks very much, Jack,
Speaker 2: You're an inspiration to all and the best of luck.
Speaker 2: I'll be checking out the newspapers on on Saturday, and
Speaker 2: I'm hoping to see in the goal goal scoring list. Okay,
Speaker 2: thanks Jack, and thanks Coach Paulin. Thanks very much, both
Speaker 2: of you.
Speaker 4: Thank you, thank you very much for having us on.
Speaker 2: Thanks you, my pleasure, my pleasure. When we get back,
Speaker 2: we are going to talk about and I guess we've
Speaker 2: had recently who's been a great guest. And she's actually
Speaker 2: I think gonna be signing books this weekend up at
Speaker 2: I believe it's a new report. We'll get all that information.
Speaker 2: We'll be talking to Carolyn Sharp right after this break
Speaker 2: here on a Thursday Eve on Nightside.
Speaker 1: Now back to Dan Ray live from the Window World
Speaker 1: Nightside Studios on WBZ News Radio.
Speaker 2: I want to welcome back to Nightside Carolyn Sharp. She
Speaker 2: was with us, I guess a week or so ago,
Speaker 2: taking phone calls in tonight. She's here in a more
Speaker 2: truncated form, because Carolyn is going to make an appearance
Speaker 2: this weekend. And I think you said you're up in
Speaker 2: either is it New Report or Gloucester?
Speaker 8: Carolyn, it is Newberry Poor. I'm at Jabberwacke Books in
Speaker 8: Newburyport on Saturday from five to seven.
Speaker 2: Okay. Now, your book, which we've talked about in the
Speaker 2: air and we can talk about tonight, is Fire It Up.
Speaker 2: And yeah, that is a book that essentially it provides
Speaker 2: four secrets to reigniting intimacy and joy in your relationship.
Speaker 2: And obviously it's around this Valentine's you'll be up here
Speaker 2: in Valentine's Day weekend. How's the book going these days?
Speaker 2: Is it still as active on Amazon as it was
Speaker 2: when we talked to a couple of weeks ago.
Speaker 9: It is.
Speaker 8: It's doing really well. People are responding really positive positively
Speaker 8: to it. I'm getting lots of great reviews and people
Speaker 8: are writing to me telling me how helpful it is.
Speaker 8: So I'm really excited to see the reception and see
Speaker 8: how helpful it is, because that's the dream, to help
Speaker 8: couples have even more happiness and connection in their relationships
Speaker 8: than ever before.
Speaker 2: Now, I know the book became available only about a
Speaker 2: month ago on January seventh of this year, correct, and
Speaker 2: it is intended for couples. Both couples, you know, need
Speaker 2: to take the time to read it and discuss it.
Speaker 2: Give us a quick suggestion, what are the fourth secrets?
Speaker 2: I'm sure you don't want to give away the entire
Speaker 2: book here, and you won't in the few minutes we
Speaker 2: have left, But what is the secrets. I've got to
Speaker 2: assume communication is one of those secrets.
Speaker 8: Communication is under everything, is throughout everything, and that is
Speaker 8: part of the fuel of relationships. And the book is
Speaker 8: named Fired Up because it's built on the metaphor of
Speaker 8: a healthy fire. Any campers out there will know that
Speaker 8: to have a healthy fire, you need oxygen, you need ignition,
Speaker 8: and you need fuel, and that all needs to be
Speaker 8: on a healthy foundation, like a campfire. And so the
Speaker 8: first secret is that foundation. It's having a purpose, the
Speaker 8: why of your relationship, as well as solid agreements and
Speaker 8: understandings of what your relationship needs. So that's secret number one.
Speaker 8: Secret number two is the oxygen, which is the deep
Speaker 8: understanding of each other as people, what you each need
Speaker 8: to feel like your best self as well as.
Speaker 6: The right amount of.
Speaker 8: Air in between you to each do what you want
Speaker 8: and spend time together in time apart. That's also oxygen.
Speaker 8: The fuel is that communication you're taught about, and the
Speaker 8: emotional safety to be yourself and to make mistakes and
Speaker 8: come back and learn from them together. And then finally,
Speaker 8: ignition is the spark, the fun, the passion, the romance
Speaker 8: that every couple wants, but many don't realize that over
Speaker 8: a ten, twenty, thirty forty year relationship, you have to
Speaker 8: work at that spark because it doesn't just stay there naturally.
Speaker 8: And so in each of those secrets, I give lots
Speaker 8: of exercises and stories of real life couples that struggle
Speaker 8: in natural, normal ways, so that people realize how ordinary,
Speaker 8: how regular it is to have these struggles, so that
Speaker 8: they don't feel alone and like, oh, our relationship is doomed. No,
Speaker 8: it's just part of making a life over forty years
Speaker 8: or however long a couple is together.
Speaker 2: Yeah, five years, ten years, thirty forty years, Yeah, it
Speaker 2: doesn't matter.
Speaker 6: Yeah, you got to keep it doesn't matter.
Speaker 2: Going on there, and you have to keep the excitement
Speaker 2: and the spontaneity, and it's naughties because in this day
Speaker 2: and age, most couples are pretty busy. That traditional form
Speaker 2: of you know, the husband working and moms staying at
Speaker 2: home taking care of the kids and cooking dinners, that's
Speaker 2: all has gone away from our society. And both both
Speaker 2: members of the of the relationship often have very different
Speaker 2: type jobs and occupations and different stresses, and all of
Speaker 2: that can complicate things. And though I guess if they
Speaker 2: take the time to read your book, they'll be able
Speaker 2: to work through it. So let's let's talk about the event.
Speaker 2: I did mention the last time we're here, I want
Speaker 2: you to come back. This is Saturday night, the fifteenth.
Speaker 2: We're going to have a little bit of snow this weekend,
Speaker 2: so I hope you're going to bring your snow shoes
Speaker 2: with you, and if not, be prepared to buy. It's
Speaker 2: not going to be a big storm. I don't know
Speaker 2: how far you're flying for this, but.
Speaker 8: Oh no, I live in West Newberry, so I moved.
Speaker 6: Here a while ago.
Speaker 2: You're all set, okay, Yeah?
Speaker 8: Yeah, I'm also I.
Speaker 2: Couldn't tell from the phone number. And it's the Jabberwakeee
Speaker 2: book Shop on Water Street, downtown Newport, and it's beautiful.
Speaker 8: In the Cannery Building, that beautiful, awesome building full of
Speaker 8: restaurants and shops, and you know it's built as a
Speaker 8: as a date night opportunity to can come by and
Speaker 8: do a little book book browsing, get your book signed
Speaker 8: here and me read a little bit and then go
Speaker 8: out to dinner or get drinks or just explore the
Speaker 8: beautiful waterfronts of newbury Port.
Speaker 2: It's great. So it's five to seven. You'll be there
Speaker 2: five o'clock and people. You said you'll do a little
Speaker 2: bit of a reading and then you're available to talk
Speaker 2: to people and sign some books. And that's great. So
Speaker 2: I'm so glad that we reconnected tonight. I wish you
Speaker 2: all the best, and I hope.
Speaker 5: That everyone who's so much.
Speaker 2: Walks in the door and is listening to us will
Speaker 2: tell you that they heard you. If not tonight on nightside,
Speaker 2: maybe a week or so ago when we were on
Speaker 2: for a yeah full hour. Yeah absolutely, yeah, Well thank thanks,
Speaker 2: very pleasure to talk with you again and guest on
Speaker 2: Saturday night at the Jabberwaukee Bookshop in New Report. Easy
Speaker 2: to find ye And as you said, a great you're
Speaker 2: you're done by seven o'clock. You got time for drinks, dinner,
Speaker 2: and everything else. So ye have a great have a
Speaker 2: great time. And I had forgotten you sure that you
Speaker 2: had ever told me that that you were that you
Speaker 2: lived in our neck of the woods, because I looked
Speaker 2: at the phone number you had, and I said, gee,
Speaker 2: where's that area, coach, So that was what.
Speaker 8: That's my Seattle number. I moved here in August. So
Speaker 8: I'm a I'm a I'm a Massachusetts person now, So happily,
Speaker 8: can you.
Speaker 2: A native at this point if you've been.
Speaker 8: Here, thank you for your native wonderful.
Speaker 2: Thank you so much. Pleasure to have talked to you again.
Speaker 2: Talk soon. Okay.
Speaker 8: Likewise, alrighty bye bye bye bye.
Speaker 2: Okay. That's it's a great local connection. I just love
Speaker 2: that one. Okay. When we get back after the news,
Speaker 2: at the bottom of the hour, we're going to talk
Speaker 2: about a short film festival at the Coolidge Corner Theater.
Speaker 2: I'm not sure if this is a one day event
Speaker 2: or if it is going to be there for a while,
Speaker 2: but it's really interesting what we're talking with. Mark Anasasio,
Speaker 2: he's the Coolidge Corner Theater programming director. He'll have all
Speaker 2: the details and then later on tonight at eight forty five.
Speaker 2: We're going to be talking with another author, a psychotherapist
Speaker 2: and communications coach so often communications are important, Jill Robin Paine,
Speaker 2: and she's written a book called Empathy. I have no
Speaker 2: idea what empathy means. Obviously, it's b empat y, simplifying
Speaker 2: communication by looking at the third side of the coin.
Speaker 2: Stay with us, and then we'll get all of your
Speaker 2: tax questions squared away in the nine o'clock hour, and
Speaker 2: we'll solve the bike lane problem in Boston and other
Speaker 2: major cities around America beginning at ten o'clock tonight. So
Speaker 2: we have a lot to accomplish. Stay with us, Dan
Speaker 2: Ray on night Side on a Thursday night. Beautiful day
Speaker 2: to day, a little bit of melting, but some more
Speaker 2: snow coming in this weekend. Back on nightside after.
Speaker 1: This, you're on Nightside with Dan Ray on Boston's news radio.
Speaker 2: All right, it is a film Awards season. I think
Speaker 2: everyone knows that. And with us now is Mark Anastasio.
Speaker 2: He's the Coolidge Corner Theater programming director and they have
Speaker 2: a very interesting event. I know it's tomorrow, Mark, but
Speaker 2: I'm unclear from the information that I have in front
Speaker 2: of me, is if this is a one day only event,
Speaker 2: or if it's going to continue on through the weekend.
Speaker 2: Good evening, how are you?
Speaker 5: And good Dan? Thanks for having me, How are you great?
Speaker 2: Just a little confused at the ball. This is a
Speaker 2: one or it is going to be longer than just
Speaker 2: the fourteenth of February.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's it's much longer. So we're opening the OSCAR
Speaker 5: nominated short films on a full run. So they begin
Speaker 5: on February fourteenth, and they'll probably be with us for
Speaker 5: a couple of weeks. We start off showing the live
Speaker 5: action and the animated short film programs, and then a
Speaker 5: couple of weeks from now we'll bring into documentary shorts.
Speaker 2: So okay, im, although I'm a member of the Screen
Speaker 2: Actors after Union, I want to make sure that my
Speaker 2: audience understands how do you define a short film? Is
Speaker 2: it a certain length? I mean, most of us think
Speaker 2: of movies as being, you know, an hour and a half,
Speaker 2: two hours long. Some of them are epic length, three
Speaker 2: hour long movies that you know, But what's my definition
Speaker 2: of the short film?
Speaker 5: I think that it varies depending on you know, which
Speaker 5: which festival or where they're being submitted. But they tend
Speaker 5: to be films that are you know, shorter, shorter than
Speaker 5: sixty minutes. Most of the films in these short film
Speaker 5: programs are on average about you know, ten to twenty
Speaker 5: minutes long, give or take. And there are you know,
Speaker 5: there's five or six films in the live action program,
Speaker 5: and there are five films in the animated program this year.
Speaker 5: And so the programs themselves run about ninety minutes to
Speaker 5: two hours, depending And.
Speaker 2: These are films one of which I assume in each
Speaker 2: category will actually take home in Oscar this year.
Speaker 5: Correct. Yeah, So, and they're international films that these films
Speaker 5: come from all over the world. They they you know,
Speaker 5: they run the gamut as far as what genres they are.
Speaker 5: There's there's science fiction, there's drama. You know, there's there's
Speaker 5: something for everybody, and there are a ton of fun
Speaker 5: to watch with an audience. And it's a popular program
Speaker 5: at the Coolidge year after year. This is you know,
Speaker 5: I've been with the theater seventeen years now and we've
Speaker 5: we've run the Shorts program just about every year that
Speaker 5: I've been there, and this year we've got them in
Speaker 5: a bigger theater than ever before. The Coolidge recently completed
Speaker 5: a large expansion project, so we're actually putting these short
Speaker 5: films on you know, one hundred and fifty seat theater
Speaker 5: in the new wing of our building, so more seats
Speaker 5: to accommodate the demand for these short films.
Speaker 2: Those of us in Boston quotes loved the Coolidge Corner Theater.
Speaker 2: How is it the project the theater has been able
Speaker 2: to develop this, this annual association with Oscar nominated films.
Speaker 5: Oh, that's a good question. It's it's they began coming
Speaker 5: from a distributor that we worked with regularly, sort of
Speaker 5: more independent distributor called Magnolia Films. This year they're distributed
Speaker 5: by an organization just called Shorts, And this is I guess. Oh,
Speaker 5: I'm looking at their information now. It is the twentieth
Speaker 5: year that they've they've offered the Oscar nominated shorts to theaters.
Speaker 5: I don't know if it's exclusive with us. That's something
Speaker 5: I should have known before coming out.
Speaker 2: But yeah, I think I think we're the only problem.
Speaker 2: The thing that we do know is that if they'd
Speaker 2: like if people out there are film aficionados or people
Speaker 2: who are just interested in film, you don't have to
Speaker 2: be an aficionado. You could go to how can they
Speaker 2: get the schedule? What what time of day? And does
Speaker 2: one ticket give you whatever is being shown that day?
Speaker 2: Tell us, tell us how it works structurally.
Speaker 5: Sure they can get Folks can get tickets on our website,
Speaker 5: which is cooliage dot org, and they'll see showtimes listed
Speaker 5: for the live action Oscar shorts as well as the
Speaker 5: animated Oscar shorts. Each program has two showtimes daily. You
Speaker 5: do need a separate ticket for the live action then
Speaker 5: for the animated. But this weekend, the live action shorts
Speaker 5: are playing at two pm and seven fifteen, while the
Speaker 5: animated short screen at four forty five and nine to
Speaker 5: fifty pm in that late slot. And yeah, it's it's
Speaker 5: just it's such a popular program. It's a great way
Speaker 5: for people to see films early on from filmmakers that
Speaker 5: are making these short films and are are soon to
Speaker 5: go on, you know, to some sort of exciting feature
Speaker 5: length film. But short short films themselves are are are
Speaker 5: an amazing way to see a story. Some of these
Speaker 5: fifteen minute movies are are just as complete and thrilling
Speaker 5: as a two hour film that you would go to
Speaker 5: a theater to see. So certainly worth checking out.
Speaker 2: Now have you found from years to year? And again,
Speaker 2: I don't know if there are regulars who are coming
Speaker 2: year after year, but regulars who just focus, say on
Speaker 2: either the live action or the animated. They're sort of
Speaker 2: like people who are just interested in one of the
Speaker 2: subsets of these films and wants to figure out who's
Speaker 2: going to take on the Oscar for this group or
Speaker 2: people coming yeah, to be exposed across the board there.
Speaker 5: I think that's a great that's a great question. I
Speaker 5: think that the majority of the folks that come out
Speaker 5: for these programs like to catch all of them because
Speaker 5: they want to be able to make their Oscar predictions.
Speaker 5: They want to say, be able to say that they've
Speaker 5: seen everything that's nominated come Academy Awards night. But then
Speaker 5: there are you know, there are some diehard animation fans
Speaker 5: that want to come out and see those films in
Speaker 5: particular because it might be their only chance for the
Speaker 5: live action too, but that it's their only chance to
Speaker 5: see them in a theatrical setting, to experience them with
Speaker 5: an audience, which you know, only heightens the emotions and
Speaker 5: the reactions that you get from from these great movies.
Speaker 5: But I think, yeah, overall, everybody wants to see all
Speaker 5: of them, the shorts. Fans are fans of each each program,
Speaker 5: the live action, the animated, and to some extent, the documentary.
Speaker 2: That's great, And it sounds as if you guys are
Speaker 2: renovating the theater, constantly updating it.
Speaker 5: I know.
Speaker 2: It's such a great a great institution. Again, it's it's
Speaker 2: worth the trip any time, but it's for the next
Speaker 2: two weeks. So we're talking about the last two weeks
Speaker 2: of February. If you're a movie buff, great way to
Speaker 2: spend most of the last two weeks of February out
Speaker 2: of the cold in a theater watching Oscar nominated films. Okay,
Speaker 2: absolutely I could.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I couldn't have said it better Dan, that's that's
Speaker 5: that's just right. You know, it's a it's a gloomy
Speaker 5: time of year, especially on a daylight today where it's
Speaker 5: you know, raining and flushy outside. Come on into the
Speaker 5: coolidge and see some great film and you know, get
Speaker 5: out of that New England February.
Speaker 2: Okay, so it starts tomorrow.
Speaker 7: First films started to say at two pm. Yes, that's right,
Speaker 7: two pm, okay, and pretty much every day Saturday Sunday
Speaker 7: every weekday for the next couple of weeks. The schedule
Speaker 7: is available at Coolidge dot org. I don't want people
Speaker 7: calling me tomorrow and asking me when is this film?
Speaker 2: I won't know, okay. And by the way, as a
Speaker 2: member of SAG after I get to vote on the
Speaker 2: Oscar nominations, which is pretty cool.
Speaker 5: Oh wonderful.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, I'm serious. That's uh. I've done that
Speaker 2: for many, many years, and so you know, not that
Speaker 2: I'm not particularly adept at picking winners, but I certainly
Speaker 2: do like to do my research, and I might sneak
Speaker 2: in the back of the theater up there someday in
Speaker 2: the next couple of weeks and catch a few of these.
Speaker 2: It sounds like a yeah.
Speaker 5: We give tickets to Yeah, can we give tickets to
Speaker 5: SAG members? Dan, It's part of the deal.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, I'd be more than happy to buy
Speaker 2: and support the support the theater and stay in the
Speaker 2: back of the dark glasses and hiding because someone might
Speaker 2: ask me a question and think that I actually know
Speaker 2: anything about this stuff. Mark, I really appreciate your time.
Speaker 2: Thanks so much for being a great sport and explaining
Speaker 2: it very very well. Mark Anastasio, the Coolidge Corner Theater
Speaker 2: programming Director. Thanks again, Mark, I hope to see you
Speaker 2: at some point in a not tra distant future.
Speaker 5: Thank you so much. Dan, You're more than welcome.
Speaker 2: When we get back, we're going to talk about a
Speaker 2: concept that I, frankly don't quite understand. It's called empathy.
Speaker 2: It's like taking the letter B and putting it before
Speaker 2: the word empathy. I know what empathy means, but I'm
Speaker 2: going to find out what empathy means simplifying communication by
Speaker 2: looking at the third side of the coin. Very interesting title.
Speaker 2: The author, Jill Robin Paine, she's an author and a
Speaker 2: psychotherapist and communication coach, will join us on the other
Speaker 2: side of this quick break on a kind of a
Speaker 2: typical Thursday night in February. We're going to get you
Speaker 2: to the weekend. Between tonight and tomorrow, we'll get through
Speaker 2: another stormy weekend, and pretty soon February we'll turn into
Speaker 2: March and we'll be getting scores of the Red Sox.
Speaker 2: They did pick up a great addition today to their team,
Speaker 2: Alex Bragman, a great player from Houston, from the Houston Astros.
Speaker 2: So there's a lot to look forward to. Here and
Speaker 2: only on nightside, but on the months ahead, as spring
Speaker 2: is getting ready to spring, we'll be back at nightside
Speaker 2: right after this.
Speaker 1: Now back to Dan ray Line from the Window World
Speaker 1: Nightside Studios on w b Z, the news radio.
Speaker 2: All right, well, we're talking about a subject in a
Speaker 2: concept that I have never heard. So therefore, let me
Speaker 2: introduce my guest, Jill Roberin Paine. She's an author of
Speaker 2: psychotherapist and has written a series of books on something
Speaker 2: called empathy. I can take a guess at it, Robin,
Speaker 2: but Jill, but I'd rather hear it from you directly.
Speaker 2: What exactly is empathy? I see the word empathy with
Speaker 2: the letter B before. What are we talking about?
Speaker 9: Well, empathy I came up with is because I've been
Speaker 9: doing this my whole life, Dan, and for the last
Speaker 9: forty years since I've been working in the mental health field,
Speaker 9: I have been bantering with empathy, and that is what
Speaker 9: this means. I just trademarked it. It's B which stands
Speaker 9: for banter, and empathy, of course is empathy. So we
Speaker 9: do this. Actually, you do this a lot because you're
Speaker 9: a host on a radio show.
Speaker 6: So you're doing it right now.
Speaker 9: By talking with me and chit chatting and getting to
Speaker 9: know me, and this is what's missing in our life now.
Speaker 9: We empathy is on the rise if you read about it.
Speaker 9: Research shows that it's cyclical, cyclical, so banters missing, is
Speaker 9: missing we're texting or my clients will come to me
Speaker 9: and they'll say, gosh, I was talking to my partner
Speaker 9: or my friends all week and I said, were you
Speaker 9: talking or texting? And so we're doing too much of
Speaker 9: that and not enough verbal So that's what this is.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I am sorry with you. With my kids, who
Speaker 2: are of course much younger than me, they're thirty somethings. Uh,
Speaker 2: and they're always trying to convince me just send me
Speaker 2: a text, just send me a text. And it's like
Speaker 2: you start off at text, you know, what are your
Speaker 2: plans for the weekend? And then they send you back
Speaker 2: a text. Well, really not sure yet. We might do this,
Speaker 2: might do this Okay, Well, which is more likely because
Speaker 2: I'm trying to figure out and it's like you realize
Speaker 2: for me texting, yeah, it takes me thirty minutes to
Speaker 2: text back and forth on many things which could be
Speaker 2: completed with a two minute phone conversation.
Speaker 9: And exactly exactly think that.
Speaker 2: The generation X generation, why whatever the whatever the generation
Speaker 2: is we're talking about. Yes, I think they're telephone a verse.
Speaker 2: I'm not telephone averse. I spend four hours a night,
Speaker 2: five nights a week chatting on the phone with complete strangers.
Speaker 9: That's right. And you know what, when I said something
Speaker 9: to somebody the other day about a banter and chit chat,
Speaker 9: they say, oh, that's so superficial. And they've done studies
Speaker 9: that if you chitchat or do small talk, which is
Speaker 9: what we used to do in the olden days, it
Speaker 9: builds comfortability and it builds connectedness, and then you may
Speaker 9: want to talk to the more So. That is part
Speaker 9: of my empathy, and we need to practice it more So.
Speaker 9: A lot of people are saying the kids are having
Speaker 9: problems because they have too much dopamine, or they're getting
Speaker 9: so much dopamine from the computers. You know what it is, Dan,
Speaker 9: It's there's not enough movement. There's not enough movement. When
Speaker 9: you're texting people, do you go oh hi, No, you don't,
Speaker 9: you're not in made it. You're just texting. You may
Speaker 9: give a smile. So what I've noticed is a lot
Speaker 9: of the younger people have a blunted affect, and so
Speaker 9: I'm getting them.
Speaker 2: They have a blunted affect.
Speaker 9: Sounds yes, it can be. Do you know that. What
Speaker 9: I've noticed is the blunted affect, which is so I
Speaker 9: am very animated. You can hear it in my voice.
Speaker 9: I'm moving my hands up and down.
Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly, and gesticulating even as you speak.
Speaker 9: Exactly. And so what's happening in a blunted affect. It's
Speaker 9: not just your face is sort of blah. It's your
Speaker 9: body's blah. And if your body and your face is blah,
Speaker 9: how are you feeling blah? So when these kids come
Speaker 9: to me, they're feeling blah and they need to get
Speaker 9: out and recreate.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 2: I love to use the word gesticulate whenever I can,
Speaker 2: because it sounds so horrible. People think you're talking about
Speaker 2: something really bad. Oh my god, the guy was caught
Speaker 2: sticklating in the park. No, I'm one of those people,
Speaker 2: Joe din If I sat next to you on an
Speaker 2: airplane for like two hours flying to Chicago or something,
Speaker 2: I would have a conversation with you, if you would
Speaker 2: allow me. I'll never bother people, but I'll start off
Speaker 2: with hey, how you doing? Where from where you're going,
Speaker 2: you know, and if they're willing to chat a little bit.
Speaker 2: Two hours later, I'll I know everything about you. I
Speaker 2: will find some people that we both know. I do
Speaker 2: believe in that six steps, six degrees of separation. And
Speaker 2: the other thing that I love to do, which she'll
Speaker 2: show you how weird I am. I'm weird in many ways.
Speaker 2: But you know, you get on to ever get on
Speaker 2: an elevator downtown and there's like three people in the
Speaker 2: elevator and you get on. He's kind of in a corner,
Speaker 2: no eye contact, no conversation. What I love to do
Speaker 2: is once the door is closed is look at everybody
Speaker 2: and say, I'm sure all of you are wondering why
Speaker 2: I've called this meeting, but I appreciate you being here today.
Speaker 2: And you get some very weird looks from people.
Speaker 9: I bet some people start talking.
Speaker 2: They do oh yes, they'll stop, look at it, look
Speaker 2: at it, and then oh, yeah, how you doing? You know?
Speaker 2: And in most cases, and when I do that, I
Speaker 2: was on TV here in Boston for thirty one years
Speaker 2: as a TV repair. People say you're daing right right,
Speaker 2: and yeah, yeah, yeah, how you doing? Nice to meet you.
Speaker 2: It's it's it's empathy. Now, I know empathy by you're.
Speaker 9: Doing it, yes, and us humor you just use tumor.
Speaker 9: That's part of bantering.
Speaker 5: Yeah, there you go.
Speaker 2: Got to have humor. Oh my god. If you don't
Speaker 2: have humor, what what is life without humor? Really think
Speaker 2: about it.
Speaker 9: I don't know. Pretty bad, so you. So you.
Speaker 2: Have three books here which I want to give a
Speaker 2: good plug to what empathy looking through children's eyes to
Speaker 2: simplify communications. My wife and I have a two and
Speaker 2: a half year old grandson. I'm doing empathy with him
Speaker 2: all the time I'm talking to him. I'm trying to
Speaker 2: break down communication. I'm trying to make sure he unders letters,
Speaker 2: and I mean, you know, it's like NonStop. Then you
Speaker 2: have second one empathy simplify communication by looking at the
Speaker 2: third side of the coin. And I see now what
Speaker 2: you mean by the third side of the coin not
Speaker 2: handing with tails, but the depth the width of the coin,
Speaker 2: if you will, which is great. And then a third
Speaker 2: one meeting people. It's not a game, your path to
Speaker 2: genuine connections through empathy. Has this been a successful series
Speaker 2: of books?
Speaker 9: I bet it has, you know what. My clients have
Speaker 9: loved it, and I have people call me up and
Speaker 9: tell me how they love it. And the meeting people
Speaker 9: It's not a game really helps people in relating to
Speaker 9: other people and finding their partners. A matter of fact, Dan,
Speaker 9: I found my second husband, who have been with for
Speaker 9: thirteen years with that book, So it really does work.
Speaker 9: And basically empathy is start with empathy, respond with banter,
Speaker 9: and focus on a win win situation because if your
Speaker 9: partner loses, you've lost, and the same goes with every conversation.
Speaker 9: So if you focus on wanting it to win, life
Speaker 9: is perception and so just make it a win win.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's it's just human interaction, is what you're talking
Speaker 2: about at the at.
Speaker 6: The core exactly.
Speaker 2: And yeah, you know last night, not to bring politics
Speaker 2: into this, but but this guy came back from Russia.
Speaker 2: He was in jail like for several years and all else.
Speaker 2: Every day when we're not in jail, we should wake
Speaker 2: up and say, hey, who can I meet today? What?
Speaker 2: What what can I learn today? Just take advantage of
Speaker 2: every day. This is these look like three great books.
Speaker 2: I assume they're available at Amazon and in bookstores everywhere.
Speaker 9: Right right there, Yes they are. And then meeting people
Speaker 9: it's not a game is also on audio all any audio, Spotify, Audible.
Speaker 2: Great. I have I have a lot of people who
Speaker 2: listen to my show who happen to be blind because
Speaker 2: they self identify as being non visual or blind, whatever
Speaker 2: whatever term they want. But it's meeting people. It's not
Speaker 2: a game. Uh and again, empathy, empathy. You could look
Speaker 2: it up, Jill Robin pain. Jill, you've been a great guest.
Speaker 2: You've been a great guest.
Speaker 9: Thank you so much. Thank You'll have you.
Speaker 2: Back and we'll do an hour and we'll take some
Speaker 2: phone calls for my listeners in the first hour. We
Speaker 2: just that.
Speaker 9: I would love that.
Speaker 2: We'll set something up. I'll have my my producer get
Speaker 2: in touch with your folks. Thanks very much, Jill. I
Speaker 2: really enjoyed this.
Speaker 6: Stay warm, Stay warm, not that if you're.
Speaker 2: In New England or this is this is almost tropical.
Speaker 2: It's only I mean, it's it's above zero. What the heck?
Speaker 2: We're okay, thanks, I'm in Houston, okay you Oh yeah,
Speaker 2: well you know in July we got better weather than Houston.
Speaker 2: Trust me on that. I've been to Houston in July. Thanks, Joe.
Speaker 2: I really enjoyed it. Jill Robin pain, empathy, and also
Speaker 2: meeting people. It's not a game, and this isn't a game, folks.
Speaker 2: This is Nightside. We are coming back on the other
Speaker 2: side and we're going to solve all your tax questions.
Speaker 2: Cant solve your tax problems, but all your tax questions
Speaker 2: with my guest Mark Misselback. He is great. Stick with
Speaker 2: us back on Nightside after this