Speaker 1: Good morning from Hell.
Speaker 2: I'm Chris and I died one year ago and my
eternal punishment is to do this podcast where we interview
everyone in Hell. And I'm joined by the possible president
of Hell, Clayton.
Speaker 3: Yo.
Speaker 1: That's me, Chris.
Speaker 3: Super exciting day we've got. I mean, you said it yourself.
You've been dead for a year, so you know, we've
been doing this podcast for one year. I mean, that's
that's crazy. I've never done anything for one year except
for drugs. There's seriously, the back in the eighties, there
was one year where I just did drugs every day
straight that that was just what you did that year. Yeah,
but yeah, I mean drugs aside though one year that's
that is something.
Speaker 1: That's that's amazing. But you know, not.
Speaker 3: Only that, Chris, it's election day. It's it's time. I
don't I can't imagine any other person that's more excited
for election day than myself. Legitimately, I'm sure everyone else
is dreading election day except for me. Yeah.
Speaker 2: So you've been running against your brother Satan, and yeah,
I mean, this is this is the night where all
the results come in. How does the election system work
in Hell?
Speaker 4: Though?
Speaker 1: Well, I mean Chris.
Speaker 3: As you know, it is a demonocracy, so everybody gets
a vote, you know. So basically what they're going to
be doing tonight, we'll listen to news coverage and we're
you know, we'll be broadcasting our coverage of the news
coverage as it comes in. But they have the this podcast. Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah,
So they have this Hectoral college. Okay, the thing you
need to look out for is the Ring states. All right,
so those are the ones the swing states.
Speaker 1: No, no, no, no, the Ring states, the rings. It's the
different rings of Hell.
Speaker 3: Oh like the nine Rings of Hell. Okay yeah, yeah, yeah.
So anyways, they're gonna tell you it all the hectoral
votes from all the Ring states and then then the
term of the winner.
Speaker 1: Either we go from there and then I go into
the Red House.
Speaker 3: I started laying down the law, changed out the interior design,
get rid of those rose bushes, put in some white
well yeah maybe, but I definitely went more thorns, whatever
busks get in there. But I mean, you know, wait,
which Ring states do you think you'll win?
Speaker 1: I'm projecting all of them personally.
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, I mean I do the numbers for my
campaign and I currently i'm thinking I'm probably gonna win
by a.
Speaker 1: Ninety five percent margin, or is it Margarine?
Speaker 3: I prefer butter.
Speaker 1: I get the two mixed up anyways.
Speaker 3: So it's actually gonna go in in kind of the
order in which the rings descend. So you know it's
gonna start with limbo, which I mean, Chris, this will
be an easy one, Okay, Man, I have been shaving
off inches.
Speaker 1: Off of my my limbo personal best.
Speaker 3: I mean I was at two feet last year, but
now I can clear like, I mean one foot eight inches.
It's it's insane. You would not believe how low to
the flow I get.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but you're talking about limbo like the afterlife facility.
Why would your ability to limbo matter to those people?
Speaker 1: It matters, all right, it matters.
Speaker 2: Well, I say, are you sure that, like, is that
is that really a qualification?
Speaker 5: No?
Speaker 3: Absolutely? Yeah, I mean people want to see that. You know,
we limbo down the beach that the one time. Remember
you remember how press you were? Yeah, yeah, it's impressive.
It gets votes. You know. It's like whenever people saw
you know, Obama playing basketball or whatever. Wow, he's doing
normal people things. Well I'm doing normal people things. I'm
doing limbo really good. All right, Hey, I'm thinking like
twenty steps ahead. Let's just focus on enjoying the moment,
enjoying my soon to be victory.
Speaker 1: All right, Chris, so you will Do.
Speaker 3: You have a speech? Do you have a speech prepared?
Of course, I got a speech prepared. Everybody's got a
big victory speech prepared. It's you know, it's a small
one here, Wow, there it is.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Do they normally last for hours?
Speaker 1: They're doing?
Speaker 3: Hell, it's like a funeral, a wedding and the reading
of a will, like all.
Speaker 1: Wrapped up into one.
Speaker 3: Oh okay, you know, with a lot.
Speaker 1: Of political stuff. So yeah, it's gonna be good stuff.
I'm sure everybod's gona enjoy it.
Speaker 3: One of the results going to actually come in, Like
how long do we have to wait? Well, they're actually
going to start telling them up now. Let me pull
on the TV here because I think that they're probably
starting coverage.
Speaker 1: Oh there's my.
Speaker 3: Favorite reporter there is unbiased, Well, best reporter in hells.
Speaker 5: All comes down to this. I am Sanderson Cooper with
six sixty six Action News. Tonight's the night we're gonna
find out who the president of Hell will be. Now,
as you know, we have two major party candidates, Satan
and Clayton, but we can't rule out the strong independent
candidate Gambo. Now Satan is projected to win, but it
is Hell, and you can't roll out an underdog like Clayton. Now,
there's a lot of people who can't read and could
easily confuse the two on a ballot box. Yes, and
also has a huge advantage due to his relationship with Satan,
who everyone highly respects. However, that is only an advantage
when not running against Satan.
Speaker 3: Okay, yeah, well yeah, shut up, shut up, Sanderson. This
guy's a phony. I don't know what he's talking about.
Speaker 2: But I mean it's a good point. Like people do
know that your related to Satan, you know, yeah, I
know voters.
Speaker 3: Okay, Well, it's gonna be like that one hymn's worth
that was on West World.
Speaker 1: Okay, you know, he might not be Thor, but he's
on West World.
Speaker 3: All right, Yeah, all right, fuck it, let's let's get
what else is he saying?
Speaker 1: All right, turn it back up to Sanderson.
Speaker 5: Ball all right, it looks like we're having some results
come in from the Limbo ring of Hell, and not
a surprise here Satan wins the six total votes and
to disswave the voters would he Limbo down to a
tiny one three inches from the ground.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, turn this off. Turn this off. What
that is? That is insane.
Speaker 3: It's really low to the ground.
Speaker 1: It is super low to the flow. Damn.
Speaker 3: I guess you're right, Yeah, I know, I'm right. Okay, Well, hey, listen,
it's super early in the night. We got plenty of
votes to go. You know, Limbo. Forget Limbo. Who cares
about Limbo? I don't care about Limbo. Next, we're gonna
go to Lust. Okay, let me tell you, Chris, I've
got Lust in the bag.
Speaker 1: Yeah all right, I mean yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3: Well my campaign, I mean I started as the only
fans account. You know, I've gotten tons campaign materials I've
been handed out. I got. I got campaign dildos. They
have my face on them. Oh yeah, yeah, all sorts
of things, handcuffs, cocker rings, butt plugs. They've all got
my face on them, and they all say vote for Clayton.
Speaker 2: So you got to butt plugs with your face on
it that people show up their butt.
Speaker 3: Okay, Well, when you say it like that, I mean
just yeah, Well, some people like them.
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, people love them.
Speaker 3: And then I even got I got ballgags and the ballgag. Actually,
you know, I hit a small voice box in the
ballgag and then every time someone bites down on it
says voot for Clayton. So you know, I've just been
barting Lust with my campaign materials.
Speaker 1: So let's we're gonna win this one. Let's start it
back up.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, they're they're announcing Lust.
Speaker 5: They settled down, settle down. We're getting the results from Lust,
the second ring of Hell and no surprise, Satan, eat
your rain called smokes. They are firing the celebratory loop
cannons in the streets, and now a blood orgy is
getting started. Well, it's gonna be remiss if I did
not partake in this once in a lifetime orgy, excuse.
Speaker 1: Me, I will be turning him down.
Speaker 3: Geez, wow, Sanderson really loves those those blood orgies.
Speaker 2: You know, Lust, you know it's not really you know,
not really your your your main thing.
Speaker 3: But what's next after Lust?
Speaker 5: You know?
Speaker 3: Yeah, you're right, we got gluttony yea, yeah, you know,
luss is whatever. But again night is still young. But
Gluttony I spent tons of campaign dollars there, all right, donuts,
you know, all sorts of foods, you know, edibles with
my face on them. I even had federal edibles that
had you know, pictures of my ass on them and
it said I eat my.
Speaker 1: Ass vote for Clayton.
Speaker 3: So like that's got to go somewhere, right, Yeah, oh.
Speaker 1: Sanderson's and he's in gluttony. Let's let's turn it up
up turno.
Speaker 5: I am back from that exciting orgy to the keep
of guys. The final results from gluttony where food talks
ladies and gentlemen, and no surprise, Satan wins. I gotta
unplug that. What you should have fed more?
Speaker 4: What?
Speaker 3: How does he even know that come turning him off?
That's that's bullshit. I didn't need those people anyways. Well, okay,
next I've got I've got greed, and then after that it's.
Speaker 1: Gonna be heresy.
Speaker 3: But greed, I mean, I paid tons of people to
vote for me, So I gotta get it down in heresy.
That's an easy one. Heretics want to turn against the Yeah, yeah,
they don't like the status quo.
Speaker 1: They're heretics.
Speaker 3: They hate Satan, so you know, naturally I'm gonna get
these two. Oh okay, wait, he's back. Let me turn
it up, let me turn up.
Speaker 5: Okay, all right, we have the results coming in from Greed,
and no surprise, the grievous person in hell is.
Speaker 1: Satan, as he knows. God damn it.
Speaker 5: Congratulations Satan, all that money paid off. It looks like
we're getting the count from Heresy as well.
Speaker 1: Be here's cross host cross ladies and gentlemen.
Speaker 5: Satan wins Heresy. Also, what are you.
Speaker 3: What are you kidding me? God?
Speaker 2: Okay, well, I mean you can still win though, right,
still a lot of votes, right, yes, there is still.
Speaker 3: I mean we're not We're like, you know, what is
it like halfway there? You know? Yeah, things are coming
down to the wire. They got us on the ropes. Okay,
but you know we got we got anger, We got
violence coming up. I mean these two they go hand
in hand, they go hoof on hoof all right, I'm
a shoeing in both, okay, you know, like violence, for instance,
I wouldn't done there. Just started punching babies left and right,
punching babies, punching people in the face.
Speaker 1: I mean, they love me town, you gotta.
Speaker 3: Punch a lot of babies to win, you know, win
campaigns exactly. It looks like Sanderson Pooper's in the middle
of an angry mob. So I think he's done in
the anger and violence area.
Speaker 1: Let's se let's see what the results are.
Speaker 5: Okay, folks, I am here in anger and violence, and
they are rowdy with the results. And I am not
making this up. Satan wins anger.
Speaker 1: God, oh sucks. This sucks.
Speaker 5: We have the results coming in from violence. There you
have it and violence. Both go to Satan. Not surprised,
always go together.
Speaker 3: God.
Speaker 1: Okay, all right, Chris. Two things. One bullshit, I should
have won both of those. I'm the most angry and
I'm the most violent. Two.
Speaker 3: Can you go get a spare TV from the closet because.
Speaker 1: I just broke that one.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'll go get another to a second bunch of
angry pricks. I can't believe this. God, poop, okay, poop,
you got it? Yeah, okay, all right, all right, all right,
So what's next?
Speaker 1: Okay? Next one is fraud?
Speaker 3: Okay, Okay, Now, admittedly this is between you and me
and the people that are listening to this podcast, which
is everyone in hell. I faked a ton of ballots
in fraud. Okay, it seemed appropriate. It seems like the
one place I could get by with it. So there's
this fake ballots out the ass in fraud. I'm gonna
win this one. I'm not even gonna swear it. We
might not even have to listen to Sanderson Pooper, but
just for the heck of it, peace of mind. All right,
let's see what he has to say.
Speaker 5: We are cruising right along here tonight with these results.
As we get the final tally from fraud and one
what is this and a surprising turn of events, fraud
not go to satan. Hey, Russian President Vladimir Putin takes
all Hectoral College votes. God as he was not running
or on the ballot.
Speaker 1: Damn it. Stinking Russians.
Speaker 3: They love meddling in elections.
Speaker 1: They love they do. That guy. He's good.
Speaker 3: He's I mean, he's bad, but he's good at being bad. Yeah, fudge,
he should run for president of hell. Okay, Yeah, well,
I guess some day when he dies, which I'm sure
isn't gonna be for a while, because you know, he's
got you know that Russian cloning technology. All right, moving on,
all right, we got the last ring here. Okay, it's it's.
Speaker 1: The last ring. So it's a big one. It is
a big one.
Speaker 3: Okay, this might meanlike for death for us, Chris, Okay,
well it's what is it. It's Treachery.
Speaker 1: It's Satan's home ground. Okay.
Speaker 3: The thing is he didn't campaign too hard there. I
think he got a little cocky. But me, I'm the
cockiest cock there is. And it was I was making
sure I was I was safe, playing it, playing it.
Speaker 1: By the rules.
Speaker 3: I went to Treachery campaigned hard. Okay, So I think
I got this one. This could be this could be
the turn of the tide because treacher is a big one.
All right, Chris, Yeah, yeah, all right, turn off that TV.
Speaker 5: All right, we were getting the final results from Treachery,
something Satan to build his entire presidency on, and surprise,
Satan takes the cake.
Speaker 1: Of course, that's all.
Speaker 3: That's all nine rings of Hell. Okay, it is, But
I still have one last chance. Okay, it's the tenth
ring of Hell. It's the tenth th ring. Well, what
is it? A lot of a lot of people know
about it, but it's Florida. Okay, it's the biggest one
all right. It's the bottommost ring of Hell. It's the scariest,
it's the worst ring. If I get Florida, I.
Speaker 1: Might have a chance. All right, Chris.
Speaker 3: It might be down to the you know, votes, like
one or two votes. But if Florida's a big one, yeah,
they don't have to really recount it a bunch. But yeah,
you know, we'll see. Okay, but it could still happen. Okay,
hold hand, Chris. All you need is Florida. All you
need is Florida.
Speaker 1: Turn on the TV. All right, here we go.
Speaker 5: Okay, everybody, we have results from the most botomist ring
of Hell, a place so scummy we don't even like
to own it ourselves that you're talking about Florida, the
bath Salt State. Everybody, let's see what we got. Okay,
no surprise, it is Satan himself again in Florida.
Speaker 1: Oh no, oh, Chris, I lost? I lost?
Speaker 4: Well?
Speaker 2: Yeah, are you sure that there's not any other rings
of Hell below Florida?
Speaker 1: No more in rings, there's no more.
Speaker 3: There's no more Florida's. I mean, you know, sure they
might include like Mississippi, but that's like that's nothing. Yeah. Yeah,
it's over, game over, man, game over. Let me turn it.
Speaker 5: Up, and that's it. Satan swept the election, completely destroying
his brother Clayton. I am going to imagine how sad
and crushing that defeat must be, because I can't imagine it.
We're here, live right outside his studio. Let's talk to
the loser himself.
Speaker 1: Oh no, Quot locked the door. Oh god, yeah, he's in.
He's in, Clayton. Yes, Sanderson, pooper here. I just wanted
to get some thoughts.
Speaker 5: On your obliterating, embarrassing loss tonight.
Speaker 3: How do you feel after losing to your brother here?
Let me turn the TV down.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, that's it.
Speaker 3: That's really distracting, Sanderson. Uh, surprised to see you here.
Didn't didn't realize you'd be stopping by, but here. You know,
these elections they're all about momentum, you know, and it's
all about building that momentum. So next next election, I'm
going to be coming back stronger with all that momentum.
Speaker 5: All right, But you didn't build any momentum at all.
Speaker 3: Well, you know, to each their own, you know, Momentum
is in the eye of the beholder, all right.
Speaker 5: Some say you spent billions and billions of dollars to
camp paignt for a year long and didn't win a
single ring of Hell? What does that say about you
as a demon?
Speaker 3: Uh? Well?
Speaker 1: Wow?
Speaker 3: Ask them the hard questions there, Pooper. You know, I
mean I was going against Satan, you know, I mean,
who's gonna win against that guy? All right? Maybe me
in the next election in six hundred and sixty six years,
all right, Yeah, so he got me on this one. Okay,
big whoop. All right, I'll come back. I'll come back stronger.
You know.
Speaker 1: Hey, I got a lot of support I got.
Speaker 3: I got Chris, right, Chris.
Speaker 1: Who'd you vote for? Chris?
Speaker 3: Uh? Chris?
Speaker 1: I've would you vote for? Chris?
Speaker 3: Of course I voted for you. You see, you see
that Sanderson grassroots campaign. All Right, we're starting We're starting
with the little guy. We're starting with the chris Is
of the world, and they were gonna work our way up.
Speaker 1: Okay. So I'm feeling I feel good, feel good.
Speaker 5: Well, your confidence is depressingly adorable, Clayton. So, Clayton, now
that you've lost miserably and you will not be president
of Hell, what does your future look like?
Speaker 3: Wow? Well, Sanderson, I got a few things, you know, planned.
Speaker 5: First of all, well, that's all the time we have
for losers. Tonight. We are going to go talk to
our victorious winner, Satan.
Speaker 3: Okaybye, there's the door, all right, bye? Oh Chris, this
is my lowest low. It couldn't get any worse than this.
This is this is terrible. How much money did you
spend on the campaign billions?
Speaker 1: Chris? I am so deeply in debt. You have no idea.
I don't even want to think. I can't. I can't
afford any of this anymore.
Speaker 3: Wait, hold on, turn up to TV, Turn up to TV. Okay,
they're making some sort of announcement. I don't Something weird
is going on.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, all right, well we have.
Speaker 5: Breaking news from the victor's camp in an unprecedented event,
something that has never happened in Hell before. After accepting
his win, Satan just made a shocking statement that he
wishes to take a brief sabbatical. I least a lot
of hell up on earth in twenty twenty and would
like to take some personal time and go on a
vacation with his friend Jeff Bezos.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, Chris, Chris, that means that the spot's
gonna be open What does that mean.
Speaker 1: I don't know what that means.
Speaker 5: In the interim, Satan will be passing the throne to
the person who got the second most vote. That could
be mean it's someone Satan says is very close to him.
Speaker 3: Chris, Chris, you know what this means.
Speaker 5: Someone Satan would say is a brother to him. But,
ladies and gentlemen, the new president of Hell will be gambo.
Speaker 3: What did you say?
Speaker 4: That's why, Ladies and gentlemen, you heard Sanders and Pooperston
say it. Why is me gambo? I'm your next president
of Hell. I'm honored, honored to be elected in this position.
Speaker 1: Chris, it got worse. I don't know how it is possible,
but it got worse.
Speaker 4: I know there's probably a lot of people watching, namely Clayton,
who who hates this moment more than anything he's ever
experienced in his life. And I would just like to,
you know, give a shout out to Clayton, let him
really revel in this. It's me gambo. Just a reminder,
I am now president of Hell. You know some of
you watching, you know, some of you voted for me,
some of you not familiar with me. I'm just your
average demon in Hell. But not only that, I'm not
only just to every man. I'm also a super cool
movie star. You might know me from films. I started
with Harrison Ford, my favorite car company owner.
Speaker 3: God, Chris, he's just gloating.
Speaker 1: Now you rub it in my face, and you.
Speaker 4: Know I'm really I'm really excited just to make Hell
terrible again, not that it ever wasn't terrible, but just
make it the most terrible place anyone could ever imagine.
Speaker 1: I'm in a good acronym. H what does that even?
Speaker 5: I am standing here with the president elect Gambo and Gambo,
I just have one question for you. What is the
first thing you will do as president of Hell?
Speaker 4: Thanks so much for the question, Pooper Scooper. I think
the first I'm going to do is head over to
my good friend Clayton's house to gloat. Just make them
feel really awful about all this.
Speaker 3: Chris, sluck the door. Don't don't look you don't look
for Clayton.
Speaker 4: Hey, Gambo, Cambo Clayton, thanks for having me and your abode.
Speaker 3: Gambo, thanks for knowing what an abode is. I didn't
know that you're that smart.
Speaker 4: My vocabulary is very advanced.
Speaker 3: Actually, do we not need to call you President Gambo.
Speaker 4: Now, wow, I actually preferred Lord Gambo.
Speaker 3: Lord Gambo. Well what if I refuse to call you
Lord Gambo Cambo? Oh?
Speaker 4: Well, as president of Hell, I now have my own
secret service team that I could call in any moments.
Speaker 1: I'd like to see what these punks look like.
Speaker 3: You know, maybe I could go toe to toe with
the Oh my god, my god, they're huge.
Speaker 1: Yeah, those are the biggest demons I've ever had.
Speaker 4: Said, they're pretty good. Secrets server still drive me anywhere
I want, even if I'm sick with a deadly virus.
Speaker 3: That's good. Those poor secret servicemen, Wow, they are very committed.
Uh so Gamb President, Lord Gambo. Now that you're president,
I don't know how are you going to change Hell?
Speaker 4: Well, what's with the hard questions?
Speaker 3: All right?
Speaker 4: It sounds like you're attacking me right now.
Speaker 2: Like, don't call the secrets. I'm not like physically attacking
Lord Gambo. So we know what you're doing for the
first thing, becoming a president. What's their second thing?
Speaker 5: Oh?
Speaker 4: Well, I think you've got a lot of good plans
in the works. I think we're going to build a
wall around every person's house. So when they wake up
in the morning, they got to climb that wall, and
every person's going to also pay for their own wall.
Speaker 1: It's going to be great terrible idea.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I know, you know, I know up on Earth
they're trying to get these masks going well. Down here,
we're enforcing everyone have their mouth open a gape at
all times.
Speaker 3: Uh.
Speaker 4: We're also going to be removing all the soap in hell.
Speaker 3: Doctor Star now hacking hard.
Speaker 4: You know, Chris, I'd like your tenacity, uh.
Speaker 3: Huh now kind of sound like, okay, please stop, Chris,
close your mouth. You're jeweling a cop porker to calon
while for today, Well, I mean, you know, what are
you gonna do for your you know, moving into the
Red House. I mean that's awfully big place and you're
awfully small. I mean, you don't need all that space.
Speaker 4: Right, Yeah, you know why, I think I'm just gonna
invite some of my demon friends there and make sure
that they just live comfortably. We're gonna have some parties,
throw a couple different events there, really trash the place,
make it look just as horrible as possible. Maybe put
up some red freaky Christmas tweets. When Christmas comes around,
But who really cares about Christmas?
Speaker 3: Am I right?
Speaker 1: That's true? Yeah?
Speaker 3: Can I come to the party or one of them?
Speaker 4: You know? Well, Chris, I think I think that would
be great.
Speaker 1: Can I come to the party?
Speaker 4: Absolutely not?
Speaker 1: Okay, all right, wow, but you have to watch.
Speaker 4: The party happen on television from your own home.
Speaker 1: Cool.
Speaker 3: Cool, sounds great, sounds like a lot of fun. Well,
I mean you're here, Gambo, you're in my house. You
got what you wanted. You want the presidency.
Speaker 4: One more thing I want from you, Clayton. What I
need your concession speech, and I want to hear it
from you from your mouth right now.
Speaker 3: Well, Gambo, the jokes on you because I didn't write
a concession speech, so I'm not gonna.
Speaker 4: You know, I thought we might run into this pickle,
so uh, you know, as as a favorite to you, Clayton,
I wrote a concession speech for you that you could
read right now, Sanderson Poopers, make sure you cover this, okay, oh.
Speaker 3: Wow, okay, Well, all the cameras are on me. I
don't know you have to read this. I don't want
to read this.
Speaker 1: Okay, I'll read this. I'll read this. I'm sorry.
Speaker 3: Uh did you try to read it in your accent too?
Speaker 1: Is that is that a requirement?
Speaker 4: You know what? I wasn't going to make you. But
that's a great idea.
Speaker 3: Okay, it's written in his accent too. Wow, it is
I know.
Speaker 1: Two wes adnes of Hell.
Speaker 3: This is quaitn aka, this stupid butt face.
Speaker 1: This is dumb. This is really dumb.
Speaker 3: I lost to Gambo, who is the coolest, most handsomest
demon in all of Hell.
Speaker 1: Okay, I'm trying to get it back.
Speaker 3: It's hard to all of my fwins in the lust wing.
I will come by to pick up all of these
sex toys that I handed out to you, and I'm
not going to say that. I don't want to say
it and eat them. That's disgusting. Furthermore, eggs gallon of
two percent milk.
Speaker 4: Wait a minute, was he supposed to be in there?
Speaker 3: Uh? That's groceries, it's your grocery list, that's your grocery.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 4: I'm actually making a stop over to Ditubal market right
after this. You know, killed your pungetone?
Speaker 1: Yeah for sure?
Speaker 4: Right?
Speaker 3: Well, Gambo, who so do you have any idea like
who's going to be in your cabinet?
Speaker 4: Well after today? A lot of spices.
Speaker 2: Oh well, no, I mean not talking about one on
your grocery list. Uh the you're like presidential cabinet, you know,
like in the red Like.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, what about like Department of Agriculture? Anyone in
mind for that? For that?
Speaker 4: I'm thinking old McDonald, he's high up on my list.
Speaker 3: Well, he does have a farm, but maybe.
Speaker 4: His son, young McDonald might be a good option for
he's aging out too.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: So who are you thinking to run the Department of Justice?
Speaker 4: Oh well, that's no brain. No quis Harrison Forward. I
mean have you seen how much justice he brings in
all those movies he's been in. He would be great.
Speaker 3: Yeah, he's got a boyd there poind there he.
Speaker 4: Could he could fly to Hell Force one.
Speaker 3: Well, you can fly, I don't know if he can
land it. But yeah, what about like the Department of Energy?
Anyone in nine for that?
Speaker 1: Run that?
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, you guys are familiar with power rangers. I'm
gonna see absord On is available.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, he's got a lot of power.
Speaker 4: He does. He does the ultimate power.
Speaker 3: And what about for the Department of Education?
Speaker 4: Oh well, completely throwing that out, there's no education in Hell.
We don't need that anymore.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, okay, that makes sense. Well, who are you
thinking about for your vice president? Because you know, Clayton
was the vice president of Hell for Satan, you know,
so he has experience, so you know, look at my eyebrows.
Speaker 4: That's very true. But after seeing the movie Vice I
gotta say it's no brainer as well. Gotta go with
Dick Cheney. Wow, what a legend.
Speaker 1: What a dick?
Speaker 4: That is his name?
Speaker 3: Not even dead yet?
Speaker 1: Guess I'm out of a job.
Speaker 4: Then. Well, you know, guys, there was one position you
didn't ask me about that I would like to inform
you all about today.
Speaker 3: Yeah, what's that?
Speaker 4: Someone who I am very close to? I would like
him to be my secretary? Clayton.
Speaker 3: No, over my dead body, am I going to be
your secretary?
Speaker 1: How did it mean? Are you kidding me?
Speaker 4: What I didn't finish was you're my secretary of war? Oh?
Speaker 1: Hell yeah? Okay, yeah cool, I'm down. I'm down for that.
Thank you, mister gambo. Let me shake your hand.
Speaker 4: Oh that's not my hand. It's that's also not my hands.
Speaker 3: Okay, I did this one. Nope, okay, all right, we
I'm gonna stop. Well, thank you, Gamboll. You are a
fair leader, and I look forward to fighting Miniore in
your name, sir.
Speaker 4: All right, well Clinton, don't get too excited, because I
want you on the front lines since right after this interview,
I'm about to declare war with Heaven. So good luck,
dere buddy.
Speaker 1: Oh no, that's not good, Chris.
Speaker 3: Uh well, you know, so, I don't know if I'm
going to survive that that they're They're very well armed,
and Gamble doesn't even have arms.
Speaker 4: They also got the higher ground, so yeah, true. Guys, Well,
thank you so much for having me and for allowing
me to come inside your house. My boat. Yeah, I
gotta go hit the hit the trail, go go do
some after parties, you know, science autographs, and continue to
take no responsibility for any of my actions.
Speaker 3: All right, all right, bye, mister President, Lord of Hell, Gambo,
Lord Gampbell, and he's gone. Okay. Uh well that was
a tipsy ersey upsy downs road that we just went on.
Speaker 1: I guess the good news is I got got a new.
Speaker 3: Job, so yeah, yeah, sounds fun.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm Secretary of War of Hell. So it's been
one year. Hey, let's celebrate.
Speaker 2: Thanks so much for listening everyone, be sure to subscribe
if you aren't, which hopefully you are, and tell your
friends you follow us on social media at Morning from Hell.
If you have any questions to Clayton about his upcoming war,
let us know. Yeah, yay, celebration one year yay. Yeah,
so great, so great.
Speaker 3: Maybe you can be my secretary of the Secretary of
War of defense or whatever. Okay, yeah I could do that.
I don't know, we'll work out the details.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Hell Clayton, Hal Clayton.
Speaker 2: Thank you so much to Barbara Dunckleman and Devin Finn
for coming on.
Speaker 1: Thank you so much.
Speaker 3: Yeah, this is your first time on the show, and
Barbara this is your eighteenth time on the show. What
do the people? What can they know you from? And
how can they find you?
Speaker 1: They know me from?
Speaker 6: Well, they probably don't know me from anything in the
background of a lot of random shit at Rooster Teeth
over the years, But I am on all the fun
social stuff at Devin Carruthers with a you that's not
my last name, that's an alter ego. Oh but you
can find me there.
Speaker 1: But yeah, I.
Speaker 6: Enjoyed being on, guys. I've been listening to it for
a long time, So.
Speaker 3: Yeah, thanks man. You've also been doing a lot of woodwork.
I think people could check that out.
Speaker 1: Somewhere right, Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 6: I make furniture on my front porch and you follow
me on Instagram there at the Front Porch shop. There's
an underscore between each word to make it complicated for you.
Speaker 3: Fun fact Devin is eight feet tall.
Speaker 1: Eight feet tall and still growing tall.
Speaker 3: Yeah, Barbara, what have you been working on recently?
Speaker 4: All the things? Depending on when this comes out, it'll
be close to a new season of Ruby Ruby William
eight will be releasing November seven, so that's the next
product I'm involved in that's coming out.
Speaker 3: Thank you all both for coming on. Thank you guys,
and thank you to our listeners for one whole year.
Speaker 4: I can't believe they did it.
Speaker 3: All right. Bye,