WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.400 --> 00:00:02.000 Welcome to Dad's on day clok. 2 00:00:02.200 --> 00:00:06.599 Parental discussion is advised mature content beyond this point. 3 00:00:51.039 --> 00:00:53.000 So you guys, A guy sits down at a bar, 4 00:00:53.679 --> 00:00:56.600 is everything okay? The bartender ass my wife and I 5 00:00:56.640 --> 00:00:59.039 got into a fight. She isn't going to talk to 6 00:00:59.119 --> 00:01:02.359 me for a month. Bartender says, well, maybe that's a 7 00:01:02.359 --> 00:01:05.799 good thing, a little peace and quiet, right, Yeah, today's 8 00:01:05.840 --> 00:01:15.480 the last day though, m h, what better way? What 9 00:01:15.719 --> 00:01:19.640 better way to do a long dad joke for something 10 00:01:19.640 --> 00:01:23.760 that hasn't happened since August of twenty twenty three. 11 00:01:25.879 --> 00:01:28.079 Welcome fucking back. 12 00:01:29.079 --> 00:01:31.120 I thought you were just gonna lead with welcome, like 13 00:01:31.359 --> 00:01:32.040 you're welcome. 14 00:01:33.040 --> 00:01:33.959 We back, bitches. 15 00:01:36.200 --> 00:01:38.239 I had to check Spotify for this one. His Dad's 16 00:01:38.280 --> 00:01:40.400 on Dequil, Episode one eight. 17 00:01:41.079 --> 00:01:44.519 I'm none, I'm dope, I'm stone baby. 18 00:01:44.359 --> 00:01:46.680 All fucking three of us. This is so stupid. I 19 00:01:46.680 --> 00:01:48.519 don't know why we're doing this. 20 00:01:48.519 --> 00:01:52.719 This is not so it is retarded, does. 21 00:01:57.120 --> 00:01:59.799 In not true dad fashion. We actually came back from this. 22 00:02:00.519 --> 00:02:05.239 We thought about it, oh, for a long time. For 23 00:02:05.319 --> 00:02:05.959 a long time. 24 00:02:06.519 --> 00:02:08.120 Oh, I got one of us, got the milk. I 25 00:02:08.159 --> 00:02:08.879 forgot that shit. 26 00:02:10.159 --> 00:02:14.120 So uh anyway, Dads on Daquel is back. I guess 27 00:02:14.159 --> 00:02:18.400 we just kick right off with what the fuck we've 28 00:02:18.439 --> 00:02:22.039 been doing. How about let's start with the guy who 29 00:02:22.280 --> 00:02:28.000 hasn't been podcasting, literally not. He's podcasts twice since the 30 00:02:28.080 --> 00:02:31.159 last episode of Dad's on dayquel. He podcasts one time 31 00:02:31.719 --> 00:02:35.840 with the Bleach Bros. Which no longer exists. That was 32 00:02:35.879 --> 00:02:38.800 our football trip that Stone couldn't make it too, And 33 00:02:38.840 --> 00:02:42.120 then he podcasts one time with the Raunchy Regret Podcast. 34 00:02:42.199 --> 00:02:43.719 We'll get into that in a minute, but most of 35 00:02:43.759 --> 00:02:46.159 you listening probably at least listen to one or more 36 00:02:46.199 --> 00:02:48.919 episodes of that. But domb, what the fuck you've been 37 00:02:49.039 --> 00:02:51.719 up to working a lot? 38 00:02:52.599 --> 00:02:54.159 Uh? 39 00:02:54.240 --> 00:02:56.680 Yeah, that's pretty much it. I forgot. Uh. I've got 40 00:02:56.680 --> 00:02:59.240 a couple stories that we'll get into in later episodes. 41 00:02:59.360 --> 00:03:04.439 Many it's down down the road. But yeah, you guys. 42 00:03:04.759 --> 00:03:06.439 You guys kind of went on your path and your 43 00:03:06.520 --> 00:03:10.560 journey and I went online. Mine took me away from 44 00:03:10.560 --> 00:03:13.159 home for quite some time, which was shitty in its 45 00:03:13.159 --> 00:03:16.000 own right. So it's good to be back now. I'm 46 00:03:16.039 --> 00:03:18.960 back at home for the duration. I've got more of 47 00:03:19.000 --> 00:03:24.439 an office work life balance from my home office instead 48 00:03:24.479 --> 00:03:28.360 of a field office, which is really cool. Wouldn't trade 49 00:03:28.360 --> 00:03:31.000 the experiences I had out in the field for too much, 50 00:03:31.719 --> 00:03:33.800 other than maybe more time with my family, which is 51 00:03:33.960 --> 00:03:38.840 why I'm back. So and but with that, with being home, 52 00:03:39.199 --> 00:03:44.479 came the opportunity to set up, Yes, set up my 53 00:03:45.400 --> 00:03:50.400 studio again. So here's hoping nice. 54 00:03:50.560 --> 00:03:53.680 Well, it's I mean, we've heard your voice. I hear 55 00:03:53.680 --> 00:03:57.800 your voice all the time. We've probably talked more in 56 00:03:57.840 --> 00:04:01.080 the last month than we talked in the last like 57 00:04:01.319 --> 00:04:04.599 six months. Yeah, I the last month, Like every day 58 00:04:04.599 --> 00:04:06.479 when I get off work, I'm calling you for like 59 00:04:06.479 --> 00:04:07.240 the last week. 60 00:04:07.879 --> 00:04:10.120 Yeah, it's it's good to be available, you know what 61 00:04:10.159 --> 00:04:11.800 I mean. Like when I'm on the road, it's it's 62 00:04:11.800 --> 00:04:13.919 difficult that I've got a lot of shit to do. 63 00:04:13.919 --> 00:04:17.720 There's paperwork out the wazoo. So working weird hours, yeah exactly. 64 00:04:17.720 --> 00:04:19.839 I'm working five to five and then I come home, 65 00:04:19.879 --> 00:04:21.720 I get some food, and then I'm working another four 66 00:04:21.800 --> 00:04:25.279 or five hours again. God, so I barely have enough 67 00:04:25.279 --> 00:04:27.439 time to touch myself. John make a. 68 00:04:27.439 --> 00:04:31.079 Voote call, so four minutes and he was already talking 69 00:04:31.079 --> 00:04:37.160 about his penis fucking a so stoned. Last time we 70 00:04:37.199 --> 00:04:40.319 recorded the Dads on day quill Uh, the stone wasn't 71 00:04:40.360 --> 00:04:43.519 with us because he was in college, and in true 72 00:04:43.600 --> 00:04:47.680 Van Wilder fashion, he's still in college. Mind you, I'm 73 00:04:47.720 --> 00:04:49.360 just making it sound like it's a long time, but 74 00:04:49.399 --> 00:04:52.519 it hasn't been that long. But but we all know 75 00:04:52.600 --> 00:04:55.519 Stone's been around podcasting. We we snuck him back in 76 00:04:55.600 --> 00:04:58.399 after a little while. But for those maybe that haven't 77 00:04:58.439 --> 00:05:00.720 listened to anything but the Dad's on day, well, we 78 00:05:00.800 --> 00:05:02.480 thank you, We appreciate you for coming back. 79 00:05:02.879 --> 00:05:03.199 Stone. 80 00:05:03.240 --> 00:05:03.920 What have you been up to? 81 00:05:05.639 --> 00:05:08.360 A lot of school, a lot of work, a lot 82 00:05:08.360 --> 00:05:13.639 of avery, and now that I got a girlfriend, m m, 83 00:05:15.519 --> 00:05:19.439 a lot of that too. But yeah, life's been pretty good. 84 00:05:20.000 --> 00:05:24.959 I'm graduating college in August with my degree in finance 85 00:05:26.480 --> 00:05:33.519 and just raising avery. She's in kindergarten now, and it's wild, 86 00:05:35.240 --> 00:05:41.040 insanely wild. When we started this, she was a year 87 00:05:41.040 --> 00:05:43.759 and a half old. Yep, man, she was a year 88 00:05:43.759 --> 00:05:47.240 and a half old and was a little spunkball energy 89 00:05:47.279 --> 00:05:50.360 and now she's still has spunk all energy, just now 90 00:05:50.480 --> 00:05:55.040 fully forming sentences and telling me how she dislikes her classmates. 91 00:05:55.040 --> 00:05:57.399 And I'm like, damn, kid, bring out that sasas, let's 92 00:05:57.399 --> 00:05:57.720 hear that. 93 00:05:57.720 --> 00:05:59.000 Tea spill it baby. 94 00:06:00.079 --> 00:06:02.600 But yeah, other than that, it's been a quite a 95 00:06:02.720 --> 00:06:05.720 journey without Dads, And holy fuck, am I so glad 96 00:06:05.759 --> 00:06:08.600 that I'm here with you two gentlemen right now. 97 00:06:10.040 --> 00:06:10.279 You know. 98 00:06:10.600 --> 00:06:16.160 It's uh, it's funny because we never we never had 99 00:06:16.160 --> 00:06:18.959 a goodbye episode because we never quit, right, We just 100 00:06:19.680 --> 00:06:22.319 like Stone stepped away. But that was that was announced. 101 00:06:22.319 --> 00:06:24.120 It was on an episode. I can't tell you what 102 00:06:24.279 --> 00:06:26.959 number it is. Ask Cryst Labar. You know, he'll probably remember. 103 00:06:27.800 --> 00:06:28.480 We love you, King. 104 00:06:28.480 --> 00:06:29.759 It's glad to your bed, you King. 105 00:06:32.120 --> 00:06:34.560 But then Dome and I just stopped recording, like shit 106 00:06:34.680 --> 00:06:36.519 wasn't working out. And then he was kind of already 107 00:06:36.519 --> 00:06:38.600 getting in the weird work funk, and then I was 108 00:06:38.639 --> 00:06:41.199 in a weird work funk, and it just went away, 109 00:06:41.639 --> 00:06:47.160 you know, And and then it was we just stopped. 110 00:06:47.720 --> 00:06:50.560 And then next thing, I know, I was like whatever, 111 00:06:52.399 --> 00:06:55.639 And and then you know, we started another podcast just 112 00:06:55.680 --> 00:06:58.680 because it was like Dads wasn't doing anything, and and 113 00:06:58.839 --> 00:07:01.160 Stone came back. And then and then the funny part 114 00:07:01.199 --> 00:07:05.759 was how this all got resparked was in true fashion 115 00:07:05.800 --> 00:07:10.079 of us, Dome sends me a video on Instagram and says, hey, 116 00:07:10.079 --> 00:07:16.319 try this for your stupid faggot podcast, which my exact 117 00:07:16.399 --> 00:07:19.120 response to him was listen, just because you went am 118 00:07:19.160 --> 00:07:22.240 Frank on us doesn't mean that you get to talk 119 00:07:22.240 --> 00:07:25.680 shit about me, okay. And then he was like, hey, 120 00:07:25.720 --> 00:07:27.639 I wanted to restart this thing. And then we got 121 00:07:27.720 --> 00:07:30.639 into the discussion and then he's like, no, for real, though, 122 00:07:30.680 --> 00:07:33.199 I'm gonna be done working and I'll be at home 123 00:07:33.600 --> 00:07:35.920 for a solid four months or so, and the hope 124 00:07:36.000 --> 00:07:39.319 is for you know, future, So let's let's redo this. 125 00:07:39.399 --> 00:07:42.120 And I'm like, are you fucking you're sure? Like redo this? 126 00:07:42.279 --> 00:07:44.120 And then so I, you know, reached out to Stone, 127 00:07:44.399 --> 00:07:46.800 even though we're doing a podcast together. I reached out like, hey, 128 00:07:46.800 --> 00:07:48.600 do you want to rejoin dads? Do we want to 129 00:07:48.639 --> 00:07:51.560 restart this? And it was just a simple fuck, yeah, 130 00:07:51.720 --> 00:07:57.560 let's go and it's so yeah. And then I changed 131 00:07:57.560 --> 00:07:59.360 the logo on our Facebook page just to see if 132 00:07:59.399 --> 00:08:03.079 anything would happen, and it was within within the hour, 133 00:08:03.959 --> 00:08:06.680 oh yeah, within the hour, we were all receiving texts 134 00:08:06.680 --> 00:08:09.279 and dms and shit about people saying you guys coming 135 00:08:09.360 --> 00:08:13.160 back yep. And it made the validation even if there's 136 00:08:13.199 --> 00:08:16.439 ten right, it made the validation that people haven't heard 137 00:08:16.519 --> 00:08:19.399 this in a year and a half and they're like, 138 00:08:19.480 --> 00:08:20.240 let's fucking go. 139 00:08:21.120 --> 00:08:24.079 There were people that I hadn't talked to in seven 140 00:08:24.120 --> 00:08:28.360 eight months, you know, not even like comments on Facebook 141 00:08:28.399 --> 00:08:31.439 posts to nothing communication like I didn't even know they 142 00:08:31.480 --> 00:08:34.639 still existed, right, that were coming around like, hey, is 143 00:08:34.679 --> 00:08:35.799 this real? Is this going on? 144 00:08:36.159 --> 00:08:37.120 Yeah, well, we. 145 00:08:37.080 --> 00:08:39.799 Are happy to say that we are here and this 146 00:08:39.960 --> 00:08:43.000 time we are here to stay. So dads aren't going 147 00:08:43.039 --> 00:08:43.840 anywhere for a while. 148 00:08:44.600 --> 00:08:50.840 Well now, well me, the last time we recorded, my 149 00:08:50.919 --> 00:08:55.840 wife was pregnant still so since the last time we recorded, 150 00:08:56.200 --> 00:08:57.279 we've had a baby. 151 00:08:57.720 --> 00:09:02.480 The babies had a first birthday, like it feels like forever. 152 00:09:04.080 --> 00:09:07.080 But yeah, I did, uh if those of you that 153 00:09:07.120 --> 00:09:09.320 listen to the Raunchy Regret podcast don't. And I did 154 00:09:09.320 --> 00:09:12.519 that with b Word from formerly the Breach Bleach Bros. 155 00:09:13.159 --> 00:09:16.080 And now b Word has hung up his headphones, so 156 00:09:16.279 --> 00:09:19.159 he's now just a fan of the show of shows. 157 00:09:19.159 --> 00:09:22.559 I should say and shout out to Beasy and then Bezy, 158 00:09:22.639 --> 00:09:25.679 that fucking crazy, stupid son of a bitch Texan that 159 00:09:25.759 --> 00:09:27.360 we love, needs. 160 00:09:27.159 --> 00:09:29.039 To hang up his love for the fucking cowboys. 161 00:09:30.039 --> 00:09:34.519 That's b word. Now Bez's worse B word. At least 162 00:09:34.600 --> 00:09:39.399 you can respect B words. Bez's a mahomes fan Mahome. 163 00:09:39.639 --> 00:09:42.960 That's disgusting, right right. I'm glad I never got to 164 00:09:43.000 --> 00:09:44.399 know him. 165 00:09:47.039 --> 00:09:49.799 But yeah, so that show. That show also coincided with 166 00:09:49.879 --> 00:09:52.840 the re kindling of this show starting again, was because 167 00:09:53.559 --> 00:09:56.799 Beward decided to he was done podcasting, so we all 168 00:09:56.840 --> 00:09:58.840 just decided. Like me, I was like, well, I'm good, 169 00:09:58.840 --> 00:10:00.720 Like we can just scrap this show because it's not 170 00:10:00.799 --> 00:10:03.399 what it is. If it's not gonna be everybody who 171 00:10:03.399 --> 00:10:05.840 started it, then let's just stop it, right, And so 172 00:10:05.919 --> 00:10:07.559 that's what we did, and we actually had a going 173 00:10:07.600 --> 00:10:13.039 out show and and now here we are so we're 174 00:10:13.080 --> 00:10:16.799 trying the damn thing and having some fun again and excited. 175 00:10:16.840 --> 00:10:18.879 We got a new logo that looks fucking sick. 176 00:10:19.320 --> 00:10:22.919 Yeah, what the fuck are you wearing? 177 00:10:22.960 --> 00:10:24.840 Aj What am I wearing? 178 00:10:25.000 --> 00:10:28.960 It looks like a like a like a park it's 179 00:10:29.000 --> 00:10:33.480 an I didn't even bat an eye until you said that, 180 00:10:33.559 --> 00:10:34.840 And then I was like, does he just have a 181 00:10:34.879 --> 00:10:36.159 blanket wrapped around him? 182 00:10:36.200 --> 00:10:36.399 Yeah? 183 00:10:36.679 --> 00:10:38.759 It looked it looked like he had like he was 184 00:10:38.799 --> 00:10:41.480 wearing a hoodie, but he didn't put it all, like 185 00:10:41.559 --> 00:10:43.320 all the way over his body. He just stuck his 186 00:10:43.519 --> 00:10:45.159 arms in it. And then the rest of it was 187 00:10:45.200 --> 00:10:47.480 just like laying on his chest. He probably actually throw 188 00:10:47.519 --> 00:10:48.240 it over his head. 189 00:10:48.399 --> 00:10:52.080 He probably found that ship in a box at the house, 190 00:10:52.240 --> 00:10:54.519 like that ship, probably from two thousand and two. 191 00:10:55.120 --> 00:10:55.360 Ship. 192 00:10:56.200 --> 00:10:59.840 I used to have a Ninja Turtle snuggie. That's back 193 00:10:59.840 --> 00:11:03.039 in the day. Yeah, towards the end of high school. 194 00:11:04.799 --> 00:11:08.000 Do you remember those wrestling the w W E wrestling 195 00:11:09.080 --> 00:11:09.720 like pillows. 196 00:11:09.759 --> 00:11:11.360 Oh yeah, I had that. I had a hul Cogan, 197 00:11:11.519 --> 00:11:14.519 a macho man same, and I think I might have 198 00:11:14.559 --> 00:11:17.159 had an Ultimate Warrior. I had Jake the Snake. I 199 00:11:17.200 --> 00:11:18.720 didn't have Jakes had Jake. 200 00:11:19.000 --> 00:11:21.519 Yeah. They were ver fucking badass. 201 00:11:21.679 --> 00:11:22.080 I used to. 202 00:11:22.200 --> 00:11:24.879 I used to jump off of my dresser and fucking 203 00:11:24.919 --> 00:11:27.960 elbow drop them on my bed until I broke my bed. 204 00:11:28.120 --> 00:11:28.919 I got in trouble. 205 00:11:29.399 --> 00:11:31.759 I did the same. My futon was in the shape 206 00:11:31.759 --> 00:11:35.679 of a V. I'm doing wrestling move on it. I 207 00:11:35.679 --> 00:11:39.200 had a belt. I'd be watching fucking raw and like 208 00:11:39.440 --> 00:11:42.799 recreating moves like I grab a pillow and stun it 209 00:11:42.879 --> 00:11:46.679 and ship. Yeah. My just had a fucking Yeah. It's terrible. 210 00:11:47.600 --> 00:11:50.320 It was terrible. But anyway, so so a little bit 211 00:11:50.360 --> 00:11:53.600 of Dad's I guess that we can say is we're 212 00:11:53.600 --> 00:11:56.000 gonna try some new things. We're gonna bring back lots 213 00:11:56.000 --> 00:11:59.240 of the normal what made everything so fun, like all 214 00:11:59.320 --> 00:12:02.759 the ship that's real dads. You know, we had Dad Feud, 215 00:12:02.759 --> 00:12:08.240 we had Dad Jeopardy, Dad's Advocate. I'm sure we'll make 216 00:12:08.279 --> 00:12:10.840 a comeback. We are going to adopt some different things 217 00:12:10.840 --> 00:12:15.679 that we did with other shows, you know, maybe down 218 00:12:15.679 --> 00:12:19.039 the road, maybe whatever. But all the Dad classics will 219 00:12:19.080 --> 00:12:22.519 be here. But I think we may try who knows, 220 00:12:22.559 --> 00:12:24.240 We'll see how this goes. We may try and split 221 00:12:24.240 --> 00:12:27.320 it up so you get two episodes per week. I 222 00:12:27.320 --> 00:12:29.879 guess you'll find out on this episode if it's one 223 00:12:29.919 --> 00:12:33.039 episode or two. We haven't decided yet, but we'll find out. 224 00:12:34.399 --> 00:12:37.279 See how the flow goes. But yeah, Channelty News, I'm 225 00:12:37.320 --> 00:12:40.159 sure he'll be making a comeback real soon. So the 226 00:12:40.200 --> 00:12:42.120 classics will be here with a bunch of new shit. 227 00:12:46.399 --> 00:12:47.639 Let's get it into the first segment. 228 00:12:48.120 --> 00:12:50.039 Yeah, I know you want to let a little bit. 229 00:12:50.120 --> 00:12:51.600 Yeah, yeah, let's do it all. 230 00:12:51.559 --> 00:12:54.480 Right, So we're gonna we already did our Dad stories. 231 00:12:54.480 --> 00:12:56.279 It took less time than I thought it would take. 232 00:12:56.279 --> 00:12:59.600 But sure, I don't know, but yeah, so let's do 233 00:12:59.679 --> 00:13:03.720 some Da fails of the week. So don't let's go 234 00:13:03.759 --> 00:13:04.000 with you. 235 00:13:06.399 --> 00:13:08.000 We got dad fails, Is that right? 236 00:13:08.159 --> 00:13:08.320 Yeah? 237 00:13:08.399 --> 00:13:10.639 Dad fails of the week. So this segment is a 238 00:13:10.679 --> 00:13:14.039 new one for the show. Yep, and just kind of 239 00:13:14.039 --> 00:13:18.159 self explanatory. It could be self a self story, it 240 00:13:18.200 --> 00:13:21.159 could be something you've read online, something Dad related. So 241 00:13:21.240 --> 00:13:21.840 let's go with that. 242 00:13:22.159 --> 00:13:24.960 Hell yeah, I got this Reddit post I found. I 243 00:13:25.000 --> 00:13:28.639 thought it was pretty damn funny. This guy posted and said, 244 00:13:29.440 --> 00:13:32.000 I just thought i'd share my funny fail, and I'm 245 00:13:32.039 --> 00:13:35.759 looking forward to other people's funny stories. My oldest, three 246 00:13:35.840 --> 00:13:38.600 years old, is in the phase where he says hello 247 00:13:38.840 --> 00:13:44.159 to everyone and everything he sees until someone acknowledges it 248 00:13:44.240 --> 00:13:46.919 back to him. We read the splash pad and this 249 00:13:47.000 --> 00:13:50.879 little girl was using a purple fish turret to spray 250 00:13:50.919 --> 00:13:54.320 other kids, and her mother was nearby. My oldest was 251 00:13:54.360 --> 00:13:58.759 trying to say hello to the fish until someone acknowledged 252 00:13:58.799 --> 00:14:02.919 it and the girl. However, he pronounces the f and 253 00:14:03.080 --> 00:14:09.080 fish as a bee for some reason, so he's saying fish. 254 00:14:09.200 --> 00:14:11.240 I put down my youngest and I run over to 255 00:14:11.279 --> 00:14:14.440 the girl's mother saying, oh, he's saying fish, fish, it's fish. 256 00:14:14.480 --> 00:14:16.759 He doesn't really know how to say that word too well, 257 00:14:17.559 --> 00:14:20.320 leaving my youngest fifteen months old, to get dumped on 258 00:14:20.519 --> 00:14:24.360 by a big bucket of water with no support. He's 259 00:14:24.399 --> 00:14:27.200 a good sport, but he fell down and was definitely 260 00:14:27.440 --> 00:14:34.720 not happy. I like it nice, I like it. I 261 00:14:34.840 --> 00:14:40.440 just imagine that little baby just getting dunked on. Oh dude, kid. 262 00:14:40.600 --> 00:14:42.679 That is something I've always wanted to see in person, 263 00:14:42.759 --> 00:14:44.720 because I've been to quite a few water parks and 264 00:14:44.759 --> 00:14:46.679 you always get that one bucket, you know, or even 265 00:14:46.720 --> 00:14:49.200 at splash pads. Some of your local splash pads have him. Now, 266 00:14:49.440 --> 00:14:52.519 I've always wanted to see somebody just get absolutely demolished 267 00:14:52.519 --> 00:14:55.720 by that water, and unfortunately I've never seen it in person. 268 00:14:56.559 --> 00:15:05.440 Seen tons of videos online, but never in person. What 269 00:15:05.519 --> 00:15:11.399 the algorithm does, what the algorithm wants, man, go ahead. So, uh, 270 00:15:11.440 --> 00:15:14.759 my dad fail story is a personal dad fail story 271 00:15:14.799 --> 00:15:20.159 that happened a couple months ago. And I get this 272 00:15:20.240 --> 00:15:24.080 text message from my ex and it says, hey, we 273 00:15:24.200 --> 00:15:27.960 need to talk. That's it famous words, right, Hey we 274 00:15:28.039 --> 00:15:30.000 need to talk. I'm like, great, what fuck's this about? 275 00:15:30.759 --> 00:15:32.759 So we need to talk about your eldest daughter. She 276 00:15:32.840 --> 00:15:35.039 has a problem and she doesn't know how to tell you. 277 00:15:35.480 --> 00:15:38.519 She doesn't know I'm coming to you, so please keep 278 00:15:38.600 --> 00:15:42.519 this between you and I. She is embarrassed, like, great, 279 00:15:42.519 --> 00:15:45.879 all right, something happened at school. There's maybe a boy 280 00:15:46.000 --> 00:15:48.639 or a girl in the picture. This is where we're going, right, 281 00:15:50.200 --> 00:15:51.120 have you met me? 282 00:15:52.320 --> 00:15:52.559 Now? 283 00:15:53.559 --> 00:15:59.840 So your daughter has a problem with staying at your house, like, 284 00:16:00.039 --> 00:16:05.080 oh shit, what's going on? Well, when she's there, she 285 00:16:05.399 --> 00:16:08.120 feels like she's just gonna constantly hear you and Brandy 286 00:16:08.159 --> 00:16:11.840 having sex. I was like, well, there's two things wrong 287 00:16:11.879 --> 00:16:18.399 with that. One got the word constantly. 288 00:16:19.120 --> 00:16:21.440 She's constantly on her fucking period, is what you. 289 00:16:21.480 --> 00:16:25.799 Meant to say, So that's first and foremost. Secondly, what 290 00:16:25.840 --> 00:16:27.879 the fuck are you talking about? And she's like, well, 291 00:16:28.039 --> 00:16:30.559 she she confided in me that she has heard you 292 00:16:30.639 --> 00:16:33.320 and Brandy having sex before. Did she did? She say? 293 00:16:33.440 --> 00:16:37.200 Hey, what's it sound like? Oh yeah, I hear dad 294 00:16:37.279 --> 00:16:39.759 saying that constantly, and Brandy's just like, he shut the 295 00:16:39.799 --> 00:16:40.320 fuck up. 296 00:16:42.440 --> 00:16:42.720 Listen. 297 00:16:42.960 --> 00:16:44.279 If you're gonna do that, well you take get to 298 00:16:44.320 --> 00:16:47.120 the fucking bathroom. I don't want to watch it. And 299 00:16:47.440 --> 00:16:50.799 so we get into the conversation of what actually happened, 300 00:16:50.840 --> 00:16:54.480 and evidently there was this moment where she had heard us. 301 00:16:54.600 --> 00:16:58.879 She heard something, and so now every time she sleeps 302 00:16:58.919 --> 00:17:00.679 in her bed she has a afraid that she is 303 00:17:00.720 --> 00:17:02.440 going to be woken up by the sounds. 304 00:17:02.480 --> 00:17:02.759 Again. 305 00:17:04.880 --> 00:17:07.039 I was like, oh my god, m n shovel on movie. 306 00:17:09.119 --> 00:17:11.640 The kid's getting woken up by the streams sounds in 307 00:17:11.680 --> 00:17:12.039 the night. 308 00:17:13.920 --> 00:17:18.680 So I had to have this like, of course, dude, 309 00:17:18.720 --> 00:17:21.160 it's me Like, I'm not gonna not fucking say something. 310 00:17:21.240 --> 00:17:22.799 Get the hell out of here. 311 00:17:23.480 --> 00:17:25.559 So I approached Callie and I'm like, hey, so can 312 00:17:25.599 --> 00:17:28.359 we have a conversation. Can we talk? So, like a dumbass, 313 00:17:28.359 --> 00:17:29.759 I take her out to dinner to talk to. 314 00:17:29.759 --> 00:17:30.240 Her about it. 315 00:17:31.519 --> 00:17:35.480 So we're in public. We're in public, We're at Chili's, 316 00:17:35.519 --> 00:17:39.519 nothing special. She's fucking crying at the table. She's pissed 317 00:17:39.559 --> 00:17:45.200 off at her mom, at me, and uh so she 318 00:17:45.359 --> 00:17:47.279 finally tells me the truth. She's like, yeah, She's like 319 00:17:47.279 --> 00:17:50.440 I heard you one night. She was loud, the bed 320 00:17:50.559 --> 00:17:54.559 was the bed was banging against the wall, and I 321 00:17:54.759 --> 00:17:57.400 just I can't get over it. I was like, okay, we. 322 00:17:57.279 --> 00:18:00.119 Were home that night. It was grandma O. 323 00:18:01.519 --> 00:18:04.519 No, Grandma, dude. 324 00:18:05.119 --> 00:18:08.799 That thing is dustier, the jar that is dustier than 325 00:18:08.839 --> 00:18:17.680 an Egyptian fucking museum, so you can fucking unwrap a 326 00:18:17.759 --> 00:18:25.680 pharaoh's tomb. So this conversation that it was such a 327 00:18:25.720 --> 00:18:28.599 fucking awkward conversation with my daughter. 328 00:18:33.839 --> 00:18:40.680 We're back, baby, Okay, this cup is powdered. 329 00:18:43.759 --> 00:18:49.599 Jesus God, because the intrue fashion of us being sucked up. 330 00:18:49.599 --> 00:18:52.640 The only taking picture, I'm sorry, Josh, is your mom's 331 00:18:52.640 --> 00:18:55.440 spread legs. Just squirt squawk. 332 00:18:58.240 --> 00:19:02.160 She on target one of those snow machines look like 333 00:19:02.319 --> 00:19:03.119 Lebron James. 334 00:19:03.160 --> 00:19:03.799 You know what I'm saying. 335 00:19:07.000 --> 00:19:09.640 You come over to my house at Christmas for the decorations. 336 00:19:09.640 --> 00:19:11.960 It's just my mom's fread eagle in the front yard. 337 00:19:14.119 --> 00:19:16.200 Do you think the minor gets blown out during its 338 00:19:16.200 --> 00:19:20.880 take crazy nights? 339 00:19:21.000 --> 00:19:23.720 Her side jumps working at the fucking bakery. 340 00:19:24.079 --> 00:19:35.240 Oh god, my white who wearing a Bash's uniform? 341 00:19:35.000 --> 00:19:50.319 I think a job I might throw up? Oh no, 342 00:19:51.240 --> 00:19:57.720 a ball blue way. No, it's just grandma, Grandma. 343 00:19:57.480 --> 00:19:59.119 Listening to poison in the back seat. 344 00:20:03.920 --> 00:20:05.400 Cou'd be your other side jump? 345 00:20:05.480 --> 00:20:11.079 Is the fucking window decal the Christmas wind show? 346 00:20:11.160 --> 00:20:11.559 Paint it. 347 00:20:17.359 --> 00:20:18.079 Go in the house. 348 00:20:18.240 --> 00:20:20.599 She's gonna she got a door to door business where 349 00:20:20.640 --> 00:20:25.519 she frosts your tree. 350 00:20:30.680 --> 00:20:33.480 This is what happens when this is what happens when 351 00:20:33.519 --> 00:20:35.000 stone infuses the world. 352 00:20:36.359 --> 00:20:42.759 Yes, joy to the world, baby, Well that's great. 353 00:20:43.039 --> 00:20:53.079 I want to give us your story, yes man, oh god, Okay, okay, let's. 354 00:20:52.920 --> 00:20:55.440 Wrangle it in all right. So I have two stories. 355 00:20:56.519 --> 00:20:57.920 Min'll bring it back down a little bit. 356 00:20:58.839 --> 00:20:59.200 Uh So. 357 00:20:59.279 --> 00:21:02.079 The first one is actually personal data. Actually happened tonight. 358 00:21:02.200 --> 00:21:07.599 So you get home foods. Food's not done yet, not 359 00:21:07.720 --> 00:21:11.720 that that's a problem, but so I offered help and 360 00:21:11.920 --> 00:21:16.359 it required bacon, which wasn't thawed. So I just said 361 00:21:16.359 --> 00:21:21.920 fuck it. I asked my daughter, my oldest daughter. I 362 00:21:21.960 --> 00:21:25.799 asked her, do you want tacos or burgers for dinner? 363 00:21:26.200 --> 00:21:27.920 So she said, are you making the burgers? And I 364 00:21:27.920 --> 00:21:31.599 said no. I thought she's gonna mac on me because 365 00:21:31.640 --> 00:21:34.880 she's an asshole like that. And she said, then tacos. 366 00:21:34.920 --> 00:21:37.640 I was like, okay, we do taco She goes, no, no, cheeseburgers. 367 00:21:37.759 --> 00:21:40.079 So I anyway, I go get in and out and 368 00:21:40.119 --> 00:21:42.640 she's gonna go with me. I said, okay, well let's 369 00:21:42.640 --> 00:21:44.240 go potti before you go. She goes, no, I don't 370 00:21:44.279 --> 00:21:47.079 have to go. And in opposite dad fash, I said 371 00:21:47.119 --> 00:21:47.960 all right, cool, let's go. 372 00:21:48.079 --> 00:21:48.759 Let's roll. 373 00:21:50.240 --> 00:21:53.799 Fast forward to we're one car behind the first window, 374 00:21:53.880 --> 00:21:55.960 in and out waiting to pay, with about seven cars 375 00:21:55.960 --> 00:21:58.319 behind us, and she's yelling at me that she has 376 00:21:58.400 --> 00:22:03.240 to peek and then like like the guy in Super Troopers, 377 00:22:03.279 --> 00:22:06.200 I'm like, we're all we're already pulled over, can pull over? 378 00:22:06.240 --> 00:22:08.960 An I'm yelling at her like we have nowhere to 379 00:22:09.000 --> 00:22:12.319 go at this point, I'm just like, just pe your pants. 380 00:22:12.000 --> 00:22:15.599 Like. 381 00:22:15.960 --> 00:22:18.119 At the window, Hey, can I have a large cup 382 00:22:18.160 --> 00:22:18.640 real quick? 383 00:22:19.759 --> 00:22:19.920 No? 384 00:22:19.920 --> 00:22:22.400 No, no, no soda, no soda, just a cup, no lid, 385 00:22:22.880 --> 00:22:24.559 just a cup. Uh. 386 00:22:24.599 --> 00:22:26.960 So, anyway, she actually made it though. We made it 387 00:22:27.000 --> 00:22:28.880 through the drive through, and I said, are you able 388 00:22:28.920 --> 00:22:30.160 to make it home or do you want me to? 389 00:22:30.559 --> 00:22:32.480 You know, pull into a spot and we can go inside. 390 00:22:32.480 --> 00:22:36.480 So we went inside. She's wearing a Princess Tiana dress 391 00:22:36.720 --> 00:22:39.160 with uh with fuzzy slippers. 392 00:22:40.160 --> 00:22:40.599 Perfect. 393 00:22:40.680 --> 00:22:41.960 We weren't going to go inside. 394 00:22:43.799 --> 00:22:46.039 Oh you unicorn dress? Here? Yeah? 395 00:22:46.079 --> 00:22:46.359 I did. 396 00:22:46.440 --> 00:22:51.000 Sorry. So what happens when you sit down and talk 397 00:22:51.039 --> 00:22:51.519 at your house? 398 00:22:51.519 --> 00:22:52.279 You just forget ship. 399 00:22:52.880 --> 00:22:54.799 That's also my amo, it's my way to come back. 400 00:22:55.920 --> 00:23:00.480 I forget shit all the time. If you really know me. Secondly, 401 00:23:00.559 --> 00:23:03.559