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Speaker 1: Best way to support this podcast is to go to

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Speaker 2: Welcome to Softcore History.

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Speaker 1: Welcome back to Softcore History. I'm your host for the week,

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Dan Regester, joined us always by Rob Fox.

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Speaker 2: What's up?

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Speaker 1: How are we doing?

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Speaker 2: I'm doing great. I'm drinking some beers already, just chat

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about history on this Sunday night. I'm feeling good. I

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only feel happy on the mic. I only feel happy

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when I'm getting attention.

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Speaker 1: You turn it up.

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Speaker 2: So when I'm at home and I'm the one that

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has to give all the attention you did.

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Speaker 1: Come into the studio and you're like, I need a beer.

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Speaker 2: Like I was walking like Charlie Brown with a six

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pack in my hand, and I was like, guy's got correct,

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It's over. But now I'm on the microphone. People are

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paying attention to me on the internet, and I'm getting

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drunk because I'm an alcoholic.

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Speaker 1: Maybe not Charlie Brown, but Linus dragging his blankie.

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Speaker 2: No, it's Charlie. Yeah, I guess because I had I

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was dragging a six pack. Yeah, either way, the music

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was playing.

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Speaker 1: Today, we're gonna talk about something that's kind of in

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the news. Okay, try to make it as topical as possible,

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because those seem to do better.

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Speaker 2: People like a little. It's the whole reason I like

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history is because it allows me to look at something

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happening and be like, as, this happened before, and.

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Speaker 1: Also it calms me down. It's just like, why why

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am I get upset about this?

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Speaker 2: Like people have.

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Speaker 1: Lived through this type of bullshit before. Whether history doesn't

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repeat it rhyme, I honestly seems like it just repeats

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a lot too. It might just repeat it.

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Speaker 2: It's a little bit, a little bit of a little

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bit of b but yeah, so it just allows you

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to look at something could be like, yeah, whatever, all.

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Speaker 1: Right, we'll make it through this. Yeah, what about China?

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Speaker 2: What about them?

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Speaker 1: What about China?

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Speaker 2: Going back to back China's I guess you did China

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on the Patreon but still yeah, on Patreon, we did

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some Battie that killed her entire family like ten times

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over to take power. A lot of that or not,

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mattris side uh in fanticide.

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Speaker 1: I guess, so check that out. It's good episode. Yeah,

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so we'll just get into a post revolutionary war. England

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is in a bit of a bind. Not only are

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they cash poor, having spent a meaty portion of their

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national treasury on the conflict with the colonies. Take that

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l you.

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Speaker 2: And by the way, a long revolution war was like

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eight or nine years.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, like it was not.

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Speaker 2: I feel like Americans have a view of war that's

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like kind of short because our two most famous wars

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were basically four years long, right, you know, you wrap

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it up in four years World War two, Civil War.

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We're only in World War one for like I guess, yeah,

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really a cup of coffee, and like Mexican War two years.

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I mean all all, we've fought a lot of short wars,

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but the Revolution and Vietnam were the two super long ones.

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I guess guatt was too, but that was kind of

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like not the same. I feel like I put that

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in a different category than like nam or.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, anything, we don't necessarily lose, but we kind of

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give up on I'd just check out. I'm like, it

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doesn't count.

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Speaker 2: It just was not a real war. It wasn't the same.

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Speaker 1: We took over Iraq in like.

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Speaker 2: Three weeks, all right, and then it were just like

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popping off on insurge. I mean there were big battles

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after that, like Fallujah and shit like that. But even honestly,

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Fellusiah was a brutal battle, but like in the grand

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scheme of things, not big.

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Speaker 1: If we aren't coming out clean, I don't want to

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acknowledge it. Yeah, we fought a lot of cut and

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dry wars too. Yeah, I guess I don't want any nuance.

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I want us to either win or not acknowledge it.

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Speaker 2: The Marvel movie, that's what you want. Yeah, good guy win,

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bad guy lose.

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Speaker 1: And there's clearly a bad guy in the Middle East.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, there's a couple.

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Speaker 1: The Crown also lost one of its most reliable sources

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for both goods and revenue. New economic opportunities were essential,

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so the Brits went east.

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Speaker 2: It were East, it was, yeah, because it wasn't. The

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colonies weren't just a production house like they made money

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trading with the colonies, like it was like you sold

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things to a pretty big population old things considered, and

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a population that was like yours and was happy to

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deal with you.

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Speaker 1: And they're also growing your cotton, your tobacco.

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Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, and it's like in cut So imagine if

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like you, just like people with tariffs now are constantly

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like we got micings in America, you know, like, but

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so England. If stuff was getting made in the colonies,

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things were kind of getting made in England, right, and

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now they're not.

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Speaker 1: Let's say you bought a house just to runt out,

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you know, make it a little extra income. You're on the

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entrepreneur grind. Yeah, then all of a sudden they have

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vict you from the house you bought the people that

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were renting from you.

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Speaker 2: That doesn't compute because if you're on grind culture, you

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never get evicted. Yeah. Eviction is Latin for opportunity.

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Speaker 1: But I'm saying the people that were renting from you, yeah,

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are just like, this is our house now, and then

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legally they win the process, I mean, and now you're

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out the house.

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Speaker 2: It's kind of like it's you own the house, but

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they built it and have been living in it the

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entire time. You just owned it. Yeah, but they did

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everything they did all the work.

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Speaker 1: Do you not respect landlords?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? I always tip my landlord. You have to change out.

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I have a landlord, so but I always tipped the bank.

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Speaker 1: Did it insane? Actually, every apartment I've lived in in

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Austin or like the Austin area has an additional like

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service feeded pedant. It's insane. It's asinine.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, you have to a processing fee for paying rent.

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Speaker 1: I have no other option but to pay online, right,

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and they tack on all these little extra fees.

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Speaker 2: Yea, this is why there's ups and downs, but to both.

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But this is why it always cracks me up when

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people shit on small landlords, you know what I mean,

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like guys who are just own a couple of houses

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or like condo or which is.

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Speaker 1: What I was talking about.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, dude, those are the best fucking places to live.

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Speaker 1: You can pay mp the stary cash. I remember in

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college two hundred ninety dollars cash. It's magical.

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Speaker 2: I miss my college rent, which was I would get

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my refund check from my loan and it would be like,

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however much money, and I would take the whole like

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I would pay a whole year's rent upfront and then

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just never have to worry about it. I would just

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like write them a check for it. Not very much either.

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It's like two thousand dollars for the year or maybe

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like twenty five hundred for the year, and it was

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just like done.

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Speaker 1: We're attacking thieves and tips on everything. Yeah, my friend

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shay I went in and like paid or like put

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some money on her son's lunch account. Yeah, they had

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like a four dollars service.

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Speaker 2: For what for no reason, just call it twenty four dollars.

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Speaker 1: But doesn't even go to him like being able to eat. Yeah,

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I know that's the paying of the cooks. They're not

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paying the cooks, they're paying the online service.

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Speaker 2: The online service is just like that's like drop shipping almost,

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you know what I mean. There's just like an online

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broker that's.

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Speaker 1: Like you don't have to sit on anything. Yeah, it's

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better go buy a shirt at software history. Rip drop

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shippers if this China stuff sticks. Sorry, you had this

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like four to five year window where if you just

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got in on the right trends, you kind of made out. Yeah,

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made some you know, creating gummies. Sorry, you lost access

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to your slaves. You're just a middle man, like you

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said you don't own anything. Really, you don't sit on anything.

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You probably used AI tools to make your logo your website.

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Oh yeah, that's the dream.

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Speaker 2: And then you want to sit back when all your

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income is passive income, you put up.

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Speaker 1: A bunch of tick ducks that link to your product.

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Speaker 2: Love it.

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Speaker 1: Direct trade with China from Europe was paved by the

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Portuguese fifteen fifty seven, when an outpost was leased from

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the Ming dynasty in Macau. Trade with the rest of

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Europe was only accelerated after the Spanish conquested the Philippines

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in fifteen sixty five in exchange for porcelain, silk, and tea.

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Spanish trading ships would bring over silver from South American mines,

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as the Imperial Government of China would only take payment

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for their goods in precious metals.

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Speaker 2: Smart, they don't want to buy on credit.

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Speaker 1: They're also starting to create a deficit, what with who

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with everybody like a They're like, we don't want your goods,

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we want fucking straight cash, homie.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Oh, they didn't want to trade X for Y.

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They wanted silver. Yep, silver, all right, that's it. Tobacco

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or any.

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Speaker 1: Yeah no, no thanks, straight cash, homie, none of your

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clocks give us the silver. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, we already know how to tell time. I don't

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care what you made. I know what time it is.

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Give me money. I mean that that makes sense to me.

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Maybe it didn't work out for them so well. It

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sounds like it's not gonna work out for them so well.

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Speaker 1: China, like they had been throughout their entire history, was

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still very suspicious of their new networks and business partners.

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They set up specific ports where foreign trade could take

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place and put strict control measures on those locations so

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Europeans could not step foot anywhere else in the red

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dragging Kingdom. So they're like, you can stand these.

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Speaker 2: Ports, dude, I'm telling you. Historically, like people talk about

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when people talk about isolationism in America, they talk about

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basically like the the main thing in like history textbooks

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is the US not wanting to get into World War

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one and World War two. World War one makes sense,

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that was fuck World War One, but isolationism was big

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running up to World War Two because World War One

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was pretty brutal even for the Americans, even for the

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two years we were there, coffee were there. So they

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talk about isolationism and why it's bad and why if

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we didn't get into World War two specifically, things could

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have gone very badly. And that's true. And isolations and

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isolationism is bad if like for the most part, like

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you can't be everywhere at once, that's stupid, But isolationism

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broadly bad.

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Speaker 1: Isn't that a Chinese film Everything Everywhere?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? I think so, it's Asian. It's probably Chinese, yeah,

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I guess. But the best argument for why isolationism is

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bad is China. Like China missed the boat and missed

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their opportunity for like five hundred fucking years because they

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were just crazy and didn't want to open up. Like

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they were easily the most put together kingdom in the

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world in the fifteen hundreds in terms of population and

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raw goods and everything else.

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Speaker 1: They weren't totally isolationists though they had the Silk Road.

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I guess they didn't let people the least, they didn't

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let people in. Sometimes you don't let people into your heart, China.

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Speaker 2: You do, you know, they could have been great. They

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could have been great, and now they're completely behind the

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eight All the entire time, they fucked themselves by being

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too protectionist, too isolationists. It's fine to distrust a random

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country that's rolling up to your port with cannons, and

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you're like, who are these fucking people? And they are

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fucking other places they've found for sure, But China was

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strong enough to push back. But they just didn't do

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it right, and they did a really isolationist, protectionist way

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that fucked them economically and technologically, and they paid the price.

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And I guess we're gonna learn about that today.

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Speaker 1: All trade also had to go through the Chinese officials

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known as the Hang, who would tax and regulate Europeans

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as they saw fit. British ships began popping around the

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Chinese coast by the sixteen thirties, and after the rise

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of the Qing dynasty in the sixteen forties, the British

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East India Company gradually became the power in the area

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for Sino European relations. Okay, love the Eice, We've done

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an episode on them before, Yeah, and we've probably touched

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on some of this shit. By the middle of the

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seventeen Hunters, trade with Europeans was limited to one port canton.

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Speaker 2: That's crazy. You have a huge country. You're like, they're

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economic prospect everything that. The other problem with the Chinese

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too is that I think their rulers were pretty harsh

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and had a tight grip on power. That's they're kind

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of like the Russians in that regard, right, You're like, oh, man,

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the Soviet Union was crazy. But the thing is, like

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the Russians have been ruled like that for a thousand

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years more or less. Like the Russian monarchs were assholes too.

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China is the way it is now. It's not that

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much different. I mean, like in a thirty thousand foot view,

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it's not that much different than it's ever been.

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Speaker 1: They're really creating in a choke point too. Yeah, like

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they're all on location. Everybody funnels into it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's always been like that in China, Like they

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always just they're just the people in charge have a

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tight grip on power. They're really insular or just fucked him.

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Speaker 1: You know. Imagine if all world trade was just going

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through the Suez Canal only the yeah be a traffic jam.

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We just had that one boat block and disrupt that

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happened anyway, I know how they never prepare for that.

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Speaker 2: Someone was just like, hey, what if about sadeweis in

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this bloody canal.

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Speaker 1: It would never go sideways.

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Speaker 2: They're like, nah, you fuck, it wouldn't happen. How would

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that even happen? You idiot, Get out of here. Why

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would you say, you know, brought it up like it's

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not gonna happen. Nijelt the fuck out.

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Speaker 1: Do you think it was intentional?

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Speaker 2: No, it was just a shitty captain. Probably. I don't

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know how you fuck up going through a canal, like

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it's the equivalent of hitting a parked car, Like all

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you have to do is just this, But someone was

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driving It was like, how.

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Speaker 1: Do you hit a bridge? What happened in Baltimore?

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Speaker 2: Uh? Well, I guess the power went out on that ship.

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I don't know.

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Speaker 1: You can say the same thing about the probably the

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boat in the Suez Canal.

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Speaker 2: Maybe if the power went out fair enough, But even then,

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the Seuiz Canal needs a contingency plan.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, well, there's gotta be some type of manual way.

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We're going full auto on these.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's all driven by AI. You just hit that

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thing with an EMP and Crabs expands.

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Speaker 1: The system in Canton was highly regulated by ching officials

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and the twenty or so merchant families that ran the

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Kohang monopoly. It's just twenty powerful merchant families, right probably.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, corrupt as shit. This is no like no free

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market economy. Nobody's you know, no, there's no competition.

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Speaker 1: We're cashing. What's the problem.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, they're they're they're stacking silver. They don't give a

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fuck by anybody else.

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Speaker 1: Echong Merchant was then responsible for foreign trade partners that

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they did business with. Demand for these Chinese goods exploded

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in European powers and their militarized trading companies. We're getting

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less and less thrilled with the way the Chinese were

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strictly or we're restricting them from making insane profits right like, hey,

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this is a this is pretty good for us, but

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it could be better.

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Speaker 2: I don't understand how that. See, that's the thing too,

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Like the Chinese they're just assholes and they don't want

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to they don't take the pitch like they're not. These

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guys are like, hey, you know how much more money

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we both could both could be making if you just

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opened up more. And the Chinese are just like the

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people in charge like now we're making enough and we're

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happy where we're at.

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Speaker 1: What's wrong with that? What's wrong with appreciating what you have.

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Speaker 2: Because most people are getting sucked.

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Speaker 1: By not being corrupted by greed.

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Speaker 3: Most people are getting fucked by it. They it is greed.

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They are corrupted by greed. If they opened it up,

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they're afraid that they wouldn't get as much. They wouldn't

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they would only be x amount richer than the next

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closest person.

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Speaker 2: They didn't. They didn't want their people to become wealthy.

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They want to build a middle class more than that

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already existed.

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Speaker 1: Well, an official from the East India company decides, fucking

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ton and this corrupt monopoly we've been dealing with, I

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want to speak to the manager.

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Speaker 2: Hell yeah.

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Speaker 1: So he goes to Beijing to seek an audience with

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the mper Court. The Shinies were appalled by this brash

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move and they end up slapping more restrictions on foreign

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trade for such sure, so he goes to seek an

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audience with the Emperor and the Imperial Court and they're

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just like, the fuck you doing here?

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Speaker 2: How does he even get there? They didn't know he

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was coming. They're like, hey, there's one white guy in

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the country on a wagon coming right at you.

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Speaker 1: I mean, they're already in the ports and they're in Canton,

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so he can just kind of smuggle his way up there, okay,

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and he just like pops out of a I don't know, dude,

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it's like, oh a lot too.

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Speaker 2: Bat tried a little bit. We don't do it enough.

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Speaker 1: At this point, the Brits were tea crazy. The average

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household of England spent five percent of their yearly income

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on tea.

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Speaker 2: It's yeah, yeah, they got the tea, got its hooks

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in them real good, yeah, real fast.

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Speaker 1: Import duties on tea alone made up for ten percent

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of the British economy, and they were at a major

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trade deficit with China sending millions of pounds of silver

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east between wars with other European powers having restricted access

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to those South American silver mines. Now that they have

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those conflicts with the European countries and the British East

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India Company bleedingdough on their other conquests like India, England

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needed this whole China thing to come through.

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Speaker 2: Got what years is?

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Speaker 1: So this is all like the seventeen hundreds. So they

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sent Earl George McCartney on behalf of King George the

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Third and the British East India Company to address the

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trade deficit by showcasing their own products of technology, including clocks, telescopes, weapons,

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carriages and others, to motivate the Chinese to purchase more

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British commodities.

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Speaker 2: I mean, I feel like, fuck the clocks, but state

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of the art muskets might have been of some use

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to the Chinese.

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Speaker 1: Maybe some upgrades to your ships.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, all kinds of things like that, Like, hey, you

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can expand your economy too. You want to conquer Japan,

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that other closed off place, some of our muskets and

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ships might help you do that.

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Speaker 1: After explaining to the Chinese officials that they had things

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to show the emperor they met in his summer palace

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in Jehol, they have trouble right off the bat when

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McCartney refuses to kowtow or bow and kneel before the

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emperor as was tradition.

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Speaker 2: All right, what the fuck?

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Speaker 1: Man? He thinks of himself as representing this great, you know,

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most powerful nation in the world.

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Speaker 2: So he's like, I'm a representative of my Crown of England.

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I'm not bowing to your crown. Yeah, play the game, asshole.

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Speaker 1: And he ends up coming up with what he believes

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is a compromise. He said that he would cow taw

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so long as a Chinese official of his own social

387
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rank would do the same. To opinion of King George

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the Third Jesus, they laugh in his face.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, play the game, douchebag, you gonna go back

390
00:19:17,839 --> 00:19:20,039
and King George, it's still King. Maybe he was afraid

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because it is still King Georgian. By this point, King

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George is like violently insane with dementia or herbies or

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whatever was rotting his brain.

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Speaker 1: I think he just thought the British to be spirit

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of the Chinese. He's like, I'm not gonna batle this dude.

396
00:19:34,039 --> 00:19:37,279
Yeah yeah, And if I do, but you gotta return

397
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the favor.

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Speaker 2: I I do appreciate that a hefty amount of racism

399
00:19:41,039 --> 00:19:44,480
on both sides was fueling this argument. Uh huh, like

400
00:19:44,920 --> 00:19:47,000
both of them look at the other, right, right, Because

401
00:19:47,000 --> 00:19:49,440
it wasn't just the British that thought themselves superior to

402
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the Chinese.

403
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Speaker 1: Chinese were like kidding me, Yeah, look.

404
00:19:52,039 --> 00:19:55,400
Speaker 2: At this fucking monkey. Yeah, this fucking dirt covered baboon

405
00:19:55,960 --> 00:19:59,759
in his fancy coat walking in here. And then powdered up. Yeah,

406
00:19:59,799 --> 00:20:01,079
and then and then he walks in and.

407
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Speaker 1: Is like, good lord, look at these slanty eyed pieces.

408
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Speaker 2: Fucking they don't even they don't even have guns, Like

409
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fucking yeah, they're both just like racist as ship and

410
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they and they can't get over it.

411
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Speaker 1: Eventually McCartney does the whole song and dance and he

412
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meets with the Emperor. McCartney was showing off all the

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things he brought over to entice the Emperor to want

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to open up trade for goods and products from England,

415
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but the Emperor believed McCartney was offering up all these

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goods as tribute. Ah, well, not an expo.

417
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Speaker 2: That's probably what he's used to.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, if you come to the palace, you're bringing me

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goods you get. You're giving me a gift. Right, I'm

420
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getting a little baggy, right.

421
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Speaker 2: It's like me laying out a bunch of toys in

422
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front of my toddler. He thinks they're his, you know

423
00:20:50,039 --> 00:20:53,839
what I mean. Like, there's no there's there's no other

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option in his mind. If I show him, like I

425
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lay out a cloth and put some toys on it,

426
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his only thought is, oh, I got new toys.

427
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Speaker 1: You have to go to your toddler and be like, no,

428
00:21:05,480 --> 00:21:07,839
you gotta trade me that. Yeah, yeah, if you want

429
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this toy.

430
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Speaker 2: Well it's like okay, well you can if you get

431
00:21:10,680 --> 00:21:12,839
in the bath, you can take one of these toys

432
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with you. And he's like, no, all five and I'm

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going to my room to play.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. So it's essentially like dealing with your toddler. I

435
00:21:19,920 --> 00:21:25,480
would imagine, you know, monarchs were like toddlers. So despite

436
00:21:25,519 --> 00:21:28,519
sending back a handwritten letter thanking George for the tribute,

437
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the Chinese emperor rejected the idea of opening more trade

438
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imports to the foreigners.

439
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Speaker 2: Because he's rich enough.

440
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Speaker 1: This convinced that the British and other Europeans that China

441
00:21:39,519 --> 00:21:41,519
need to be shaken up a bit if they truly

442
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wanted to maximize profits.

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Speaker 2: I'm telling you he didn't want They didn't want other

444
00:21:46,440 --> 00:21:50,200
influence in their country. Like they were protectionists, they were isolationists.

445
00:21:50,240 --> 00:21:52,720
They wanted to keep It was probably out of racism

446
00:21:52,720 --> 00:21:54,559
too for them that they were like, we gotta keep

447
00:21:54,640 --> 00:21:57,319
China China, right, we got to keep China pure.

448
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Speaker 1: It was also probably a good idea. I mean, look

449
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then dealing with these uh yeah, they were butt fucking India,

450
00:22:05,599 --> 00:22:08,880
These Europeans that were just because you're right about a

451
00:22:08,880 --> 00:22:13,559
person doesn't mean every action you take because you were

452
00:22:13,640 --> 00:22:15,799
right about them is also right.

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Speaker 2: You know what I mean? Like, if you're like, this

454
00:22:18,119 --> 00:22:21,640
person's lying to me, you shouldn't shoot them in the face. Yeah,

455
00:22:22,079 --> 00:22:24,559
that feels like what he took the most drastic measure

456
00:22:24,599 --> 00:22:27,200
possible over his rightful suspicion.

457
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Speaker 1: You just take their word for a lie. You don't

458
00:22:29,759 --> 00:22:31,240
have to necessarily kill them for.

459
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Speaker 2: You can still, by the way, open up trade while

460
00:22:33,839 --> 00:22:36,960
restricting it and setting rules. But they just brick wall.

461
00:22:37,240 --> 00:22:40,920
They have a glory hole of trade. There's a traffic

462
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jam in that glory hole.

463
00:22:42,000 --> 00:22:45,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, and I mean you don't want that in a gloryhole.

464
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Speaker 2: No traffic jam sounds like a nightmare.

465
00:22:47,640 --> 00:22:49,400
Speaker 1: You're fitting too many dicks in that gloriole.

466
00:22:49,480 --> 00:22:50,599
Speaker 2: You don't know. You don't want to get an a

467
00:22:50,599 --> 00:22:52,440
fender bender in line.

468
00:22:52,519 --> 00:22:57,079
Speaker 1: It gets messy, real quick, real fast. It all culminated

469
00:22:57,119 --> 00:22:59,640
when the Brits got this wide idea from their struggles

470
00:22:59,640 --> 00:23:03,160
and adaptive nature in India. Someone in the East India

471
00:23:03,200 --> 00:23:07,480
Company figured out, oh wow, poppy grows incredibly well in

472
00:23:07,519 --> 00:23:11,839
these parts. They of course, converted the poppy to opium

473
00:23:11,839 --> 00:23:14,920
and set up a market pushing the drug in Calcutta.

474
00:23:16,039 --> 00:23:19,920
So that's like kind of the closest Indian port to China.

475
00:23:20,039 --> 00:23:20,400
Speaker 2: Okay.

476
00:23:20,720 --> 00:23:23,599
Speaker 1: And since opium was illegal in China, the East India

477
00:23:23,599 --> 00:23:26,319
Company of England could not directly just sling the drugs

478
00:23:26,359 --> 00:23:30,400
on the corner of Canton, Okay. Perfect, So they used

479
00:23:30,440 --> 00:23:33,160
some faceless smugglers to get the ball move in and

480
00:23:33,200 --> 00:23:37,640
the Chinese market in population addicted. God, they had a

481
00:23:37,680 --> 00:23:40,160
bunch of pirates and smugglers go into Canton and just

482
00:23:40,200 --> 00:23:45,000
like drop a shit ton of opium into the public

483
00:23:45,119 --> 00:23:45,599
and get.

484
00:23:45,480 --> 00:23:50,880
Speaker 2: The fucking hooks in. Yeah, oh boy, probably would have

485
00:23:50,880 --> 00:23:54,319
been better to just buy the clocks. Probably just buy

486
00:23:54,359 --> 00:23:57,039
the clocks. Just bow to the emperor, just buy the clocks.

487
00:23:57,400 --> 00:23:58,839
This is a trade war, right, I mean, this is

488
00:23:58,839 --> 00:23:59,319
a trade war.

489
00:23:59,359 --> 00:24:04,200
Speaker 1: At this point is the national trade wark. Private contractors

490
00:24:04,359 --> 00:24:06,799
backed by the East India Company and English government started

491
00:24:06,799 --> 00:24:09,279
flooding the Chinese with some of the most potent opium

492
00:24:09,359 --> 00:24:13,000
in the world. It was a smash hit operation that

493
00:24:13,119 --> 00:24:15,279
only amplified when the Brits got rid of the East

494
00:24:15,279 --> 00:24:19,160
India Company's exclusivity to the opium trade in eighteen thirty three.

495
00:24:19,440 --> 00:24:21,440
Speaker 2: We got to open this up, sweacking to whale boys.

496
00:24:21,480 --> 00:24:24,000
Now you're the bottleneck. We go.

497
00:24:24,319 --> 00:24:26,920
Speaker 1: We need some more at least, you know, enough ships.

498
00:24:28,079 --> 00:24:31,039
By eighteen thirty nine, close to six million pounds of

499
00:24:31,039 --> 00:24:33,279
opium would flood into China a year.

500
00:24:33,680 --> 00:24:35,839
Speaker 2: Good. Yeah, it's a lot of open he said. It

501
00:24:35,839 --> 00:24:38,160
was strong opium too, So you're just like throwing.

502
00:24:37,839 --> 00:24:39,799
Speaker 1: A much stronger than what the Chinese were used to.

503
00:24:40,160 --> 00:24:43,559
Speaker 2: You're throwing like a somebody's I've just to use my

504
00:24:43,599 --> 00:24:47,720
own analogy here. Somebody's you know, rocking three milligrams ins

505
00:24:47,720 --> 00:24:49,240
and you just start jamming.

506
00:24:49,480 --> 00:24:54,839
Speaker 1: Two hundred milligram Yeah. The emperor appointed an official to

507
00:24:54,880 --> 00:24:56,960
try to combat the title wave of drugs wiping out

508
00:24:57,000 --> 00:25:01,000
his kingdom. Len Zashu was the man for the job,

509
00:25:01,559 --> 00:25:04,160
and he went down to Canton and tried to hit

510
00:25:04,319 --> 00:25:06,880
back on the opium trade as hard as he could.

511
00:25:07,000 --> 00:25:09,240
Speaker 2: Probably could have used some new guns for them.

512
00:25:10,160 --> 00:25:16,200
Speaker 1: Thousands were placed under arrests for the distribution of the drug.

513
00:25:16,920 --> 00:25:20,960
Addicts were forced into rehabilitation, and Len showed up to

514
00:25:21,039 --> 00:25:24,119
the foreign warehouses to confiscate every ounce of opium.

515
00:25:24,160 --> 00:25:25,480
Speaker 2: This is not the way to do it. What I

516
00:25:25,480 --> 00:25:29,200
would have done if I was Len she is start

517
00:25:29,279 --> 00:25:34,119
handing out safe, clean opium pipes to all of them. Well,

518
00:25:34,160 --> 00:25:36,240
he saw a pipe, he took it, and no, that's wrong.

519
00:25:36,279 --> 00:25:38,519
You get maybe take it because it's dirty and give

520
00:25:38,559 --> 00:25:40,519
them a clean one. And you give them some safe

521
00:25:40,599 --> 00:25:45,759
areas near schools and places of business where they can

522
00:25:45,799 --> 00:25:49,160
do as much opium as they want. Huh, that's the

523
00:25:49,200 --> 00:25:50,000
smart thing to do.

524
00:25:51,720 --> 00:25:53,119
Speaker 1: I mean, it works well in Kensington.

525
00:25:53,319 --> 00:25:57,160
Speaker 2: All an addict needs is just a little more time

526
00:25:57,200 --> 00:26:03,240
to do their drugs safely, and that don't need you

527
00:26:03,240 --> 00:26:08,480
to do it again, but eventually it might work out.

528
00:26:08,519 --> 00:26:11,759
They're happy, and that's the important thing. M I want

529
00:26:11,759 --> 00:26:13,880
to like if I you know how like in Butterfly Effect,

530
00:26:15,279 --> 00:26:17,079
the guy could like go back in time inside his

531
00:26:17,079 --> 00:26:18,599
own body, you know what I mean.

532
00:26:18,759 --> 00:26:19,599
Speaker 1: I didn't watch the movie.

533
00:26:19,640 --> 00:26:21,720
Speaker 2: Okay, it sucks, but that's like a thing in the

534
00:26:21,759 --> 00:26:23,400
movie is he can go back in time in like

535
00:26:23,440 --> 00:26:25,400
his own body. He can go back to like previous

536
00:26:25,440 --> 00:26:27,799
times in his life essentially, and he's like his twelve

537
00:26:27,839 --> 00:26:29,519
year old self is eight year old self, is twenty

538
00:26:29,559 --> 00:26:30,640
year old self whatever.

539
00:26:30,400 --> 00:26:32,640
Speaker 1: And it has a butterfly effect when he changes things.

540
00:26:32,720 --> 00:26:37,119
Speaker 2: Yeah, So what I want to do with that is

541
00:26:37,200 --> 00:26:39,839
go back to like my seventh grade dear class, and

542
00:26:39,920 --> 00:26:41,839
when the police officers there being.

543
00:26:41,759 --> 00:26:45,680
Speaker 1: Like, can't do cocaine, can't drink too much, don't smoke, reefer.

544
00:26:45,799 --> 00:26:48,359
Speaker 2: I just want to be like h officer Plump.

545
00:26:49,000 --> 00:26:51,279
Speaker 1: I think it was it was ulster plump after plump.

546
00:26:51,519 --> 00:26:54,240
Speaker 2: What if I was allowed to do the heroin but

547
00:26:54,319 --> 00:26:56,359
you just made chaired by needles were clean, had the

548
00:26:56,400 --> 00:26:57,880
place I was doing it, it was safe for that.

549
00:26:57,880 --> 00:26:59,519
I could do as much herowin as I wanted to,

550
00:27:00,160 --> 00:27:04,079
Like watch the reaction yeah to a nineties cop being like,

551
00:27:04,880 --> 00:27:07,200
probably just take his night stick out, Like I don't care.

552
00:27:07,319 --> 00:27:11,440
Speaker 1: They're losing their minds now, Like I don't care. What

553
00:27:11,480 --> 00:27:12,039
has happened in.

554
00:27:12,079 --> 00:27:14,839
Speaker 2: This idea is too fucking stupid to let you not

555
00:27:14,960 --> 00:27:16,000
get smacked in the head.

556
00:27:16,440 --> 00:27:19,440
Speaker 1: At one point, Len had to go to a foreign

557
00:27:19,480 --> 00:27:22,720
warehouse and open up siege for months.

558
00:27:24,920 --> 00:27:26,640
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I had to put a he like put

559
00:27:26,640 --> 00:27:27,920
a warehouse under siege.

560
00:27:27,839 --> 00:27:30,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, they just wouldn't give up the drugs, Like I mean,

561
00:27:30,720 --> 00:27:32,880
we're not open enough for you to Yeah, we don't

562
00:27:32,880 --> 00:27:34,640
have to abide by Chinese law.

563
00:27:34,480 --> 00:27:36,279
Speaker 2: All right, this technically isn't China.

564
00:27:36,920 --> 00:27:39,039
Speaker 1: It's like its own foreign port thing.

565
00:27:38,920 --> 00:27:41,079
Speaker 2: They own that like little specific area.

566
00:27:40,960 --> 00:27:45,079
Speaker 1: Yeah kind of, it's it's a gray area, yeah yeah, yeah,

567
00:27:45,119 --> 00:27:48,599
because len is obviously like, no, you're you're on Chinese land.

568
00:27:48,759 --> 00:27:51,400
You go buy Chinese law, give up the drugs. Nobody

569
00:27:51,440 --> 00:27:51,839
gets hurt.

570
00:27:51,880 --> 00:27:53,440
Speaker 2: They just keep the door locked and that. Yeah. If

571
00:27:53,440 --> 00:27:55,160
you come in a we got bad must gets in,

572
00:27:55,240 --> 00:27:55,680
yeah dad.

573
00:27:56,839 --> 00:28:00,960
Speaker 1: Ultimately, though Troy, they finally give up and Lenn at

574
00:28:00,960 --> 00:28:04,440
one point burns twenty one thousand chest of opium.

575
00:28:04,799 --> 00:28:07,680
Speaker 2: Or if anyone allowed near caused British merchants.

576
00:28:07,279 --> 00:28:09,640
Speaker 1: To lose their damn minds over that loss. Yeah, a

577
00:28:09,720 --> 00:28:10,759
lot of money loss there.

578
00:28:10,839 --> 00:28:12,839
Speaker 2: I'm just wondering if any attics were just like running

579
00:28:12,880 --> 00:28:13,680
towards the fire.

580
00:28:14,599 --> 00:28:17,079
Speaker 1: I don't think they did it in like a open

581
00:28:17,160 --> 00:28:19,799
space poka everyone to inhale it.

582
00:28:20,039 --> 00:28:21,960
Speaker 2: You just do it like on the outskirts of the city.

583
00:28:21,960 --> 00:28:24,319
And an opium, you just get more people addicted. Like

584
00:28:24,359 --> 00:28:26,920
the opium clout, the winds change, and it's just.

585
00:28:26,799 --> 00:28:28,440
Speaker 1: Like goes into like the soil.

586
00:28:29,440 --> 00:28:32,640
Speaker 2: Everyone's the groundwater like everyone is just high as fun.

587
00:28:32,759 --> 00:28:37,319
Everyone's addicted. Now it's like a baby that's born addicted

588
00:28:37,319 --> 00:28:40,839
to crack and it's just like going bananas with withdrawals,

589
00:28:42,200 --> 00:28:42,640
or just like.

590
00:28:42,599 --> 00:28:46,119
Speaker 1: A bonfire for like a high school football team, but

591
00:28:46,200 --> 00:28:47,079
with opium.

592
00:28:47,440 --> 00:28:49,240
Speaker 2: That'd be funny if someone just threw like a brick

593
00:28:49,279 --> 00:28:52,519
of opium or weed or something into a high school bonfire.

594
00:28:52,880 --> 00:28:58,119
It's like spiking the punch, but more twenty first century, Lynn.

595
00:28:58,079 --> 00:29:02,319
Speaker 1: Demanded that all foreign urchins and ching officials sign a

596
00:29:02,359 --> 00:29:06,799
new Bahn promising not to deal opium under penalty of death.

597
00:29:07,000 --> 00:29:07,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, sounds right.

598
00:29:08,200 --> 00:29:10,359
Speaker 1: Around the same time, British sailors got drunk off rice

599
00:29:10,400 --> 00:29:13,559
liquor and beat the absolute life out of a Chinese man,

600
00:29:14,160 --> 00:29:19,599
killed him. Okay, look, Mark Wahlberg, just sailor stuff. Mm hmm.

601
00:29:21,480 --> 00:29:24,400
Charles Elliott offered a reward for the capture of these

602
00:29:24,440 --> 00:29:27,480
two sailors and gave money to the victim's family to

603
00:29:27,480 --> 00:29:28,880
try to ease over tensions.

604
00:29:29,079 --> 00:29:34,039
Speaker 2: I like that that was the international incident, but not

605
00:29:34,160 --> 00:29:37,559
that they had warehouses full of illegal drugs that were

606
00:29:37,599 --> 00:29:41,880
here siege, hooking the citizens on. Like that I would

607
00:29:41,920 --> 00:29:43,680
have been. I would have imagined that would have closed down,

608
00:29:43,680 --> 00:29:45,400
traded me like the Emperor would been like we're done,

609
00:29:45,920 --> 00:29:49,880
We're fucking done. But it was two sales. Two idiots

610
00:29:50,240 --> 00:29:51,359
that just beat the shit out of it.

611
00:29:51,480 --> 00:29:56,200
Speaker 1: I was just like a fucking villager. Yeah, just said nobody.

612
00:29:55,359 --> 00:29:57,720
Speaker 2: Like, hey, you can't do that to our pledges. Only

613
00:29:57,799 --> 00:30:00,160
we can do that to our pledges. So it's I

614
00:30:00,160 --> 00:30:02,519
imagine the Chinese reaction more or less was well.

615
00:30:02,559 --> 00:30:06,119
Speaker 1: When the sailors were caught, Elliott tried to get them

616
00:30:06,160 --> 00:30:08,440
onto the boat and sentence them to hard labor back

617
00:30:08,480 --> 00:30:12,480
in England, much to the dismay of Len as a Shu, Who's.

618
00:30:12,319 --> 00:30:14,920
Speaker 2: Like, what, no, they're gonna die.

619
00:30:15,200 --> 00:30:16,119
Speaker 1: The fuck those dudes.

620
00:30:16,720 --> 00:30:20,039
Speaker 2: Honestly, I again, play the game. Those guys are worthless,

621
00:30:20,319 --> 00:30:23,759
they are murderers. Just let them be executed by the

622
00:30:23,759 --> 00:30:24,599
fucking Chinese.

623
00:30:25,000 --> 00:30:28,200
Speaker 1: Len believed they should answer to Chinese law from crimes

624
00:30:28,200 --> 00:30:29,519
committed on Chinese land.

625
00:30:29,559 --> 00:30:32,559
Speaker 2: I agree completely, Actually, like fuck those guys.

626
00:30:32,680 --> 00:30:38,039
Speaker 1: In response, Len, then stop providing food to English merchants

627
00:30:38,039 --> 00:30:40,559
in China. It's like, all right, you're not gonna give

628
00:30:40,599 --> 00:30:42,799
us these guys. We don't have to provide you with

629
00:30:42,880 --> 00:30:43,519
fucking food.

630
00:30:43,680 --> 00:30:46,759
Speaker 2: Yeah, water, no more rice bowls for you.

631
00:30:47,279 --> 00:30:48,000
Speaker 1: Try to live here.

632
00:30:48,119 --> 00:30:49,799
Speaker 2: Rice wine out of the question.

633
00:30:50,119 --> 00:30:52,599
Speaker 1: Try to live here. We're not gonna provide you with shit, Yeah,

634
00:30:53,559 --> 00:30:54,559
it's gonna be real hard.

635
00:30:54,720 --> 00:30:56,440
Speaker 2: I guess like was the British guy like oh with

636
00:30:56,559 --> 00:30:58,079
the other side of those would be quite mad to

637
00:30:58,200 --> 00:31:01,799
fuck you know, gave him a to these fucking monkeys,

638
00:31:01,839 --> 00:31:02,000
you know.

639
00:31:02,079 --> 00:31:04,079
Speaker 1: I mean it was an international incident when the fucking

640
00:31:04,559 --> 00:31:06,519
American kid in the nineties got lashed.

641
00:31:07,079 --> 00:31:08,079
Speaker 2: Well, he deserved it too.

642
00:31:08,400 --> 00:31:10,359
Speaker 1: Yeah, but who was that.

643
00:31:10,880 --> 00:31:13,359
Speaker 2: I don't know. He got Kane was in Singapore, and Singapore.

644
00:31:13,440 --> 00:31:15,279
If you go to Singapore and you fuck around, you

645
00:31:15,319 --> 00:31:18,559
absolutely deserve it. The same way if you're like I'm

646
00:31:18,599 --> 00:31:22,079
in a bicycle through Syria, you don't. You don't deserve

647
00:31:22,119 --> 00:31:23,319
the governments.

648
00:31:23,880 --> 00:31:25,480
Speaker 1: We're a class trip to North Korea.

649
00:31:25,839 --> 00:31:27,640
Speaker 2: Uh, it wasn't even a class trip. He was on

650
00:31:27,640 --> 00:31:29,599
a classroom somewhere else and then booked his own ship

651
00:31:29,640 --> 00:31:35,279
to North Korea or a piano. Also, don't feel bad

652
00:31:35,599 --> 00:31:39,599
at all. It's literally sticking your head in a fucking tigers.

653
00:31:39,319 --> 00:31:41,440
Speaker 1: That Banner would have looked sick in his dorm though

654
00:31:41,480 --> 00:31:44,200
it is I used it a fraternity. Yeah, we looks

655
00:31:44,200 --> 00:31:45,960
sick in his frat house. I know you gonna go

656
00:31:45,960 --> 00:31:48,160
through shoot from North Korea, then some chick still doesn't

657
00:31:48,160 --> 00:31:53,279
fuck him like sad not worth it. It's eleven of

658
00:31:53,279 --> 00:31:53,880
the line.

659
00:31:55,720 --> 00:31:56,119
Speaker 2: Uh.

660
00:31:56,200 --> 00:32:01,839
Speaker 1: I think that's my biggest regret was making a giff

661
00:32:01,839 --> 00:32:06,279
of Auto warm beer just breaking rocks like a Looney tune.

662
00:32:07,680 --> 00:32:09,599
Because it was before he died. It was before he died.

663
00:32:10,839 --> 00:32:13,119
I was under the impression that Trump had worked out

664
00:32:13,119 --> 00:32:14,160
the deal to get him back.

665
00:32:14,279 --> 00:32:18,440
Speaker 2: He was no. He he was getting beaten to death, right,

666
00:32:18,440 --> 00:32:18,720
But we.

667
00:32:18,720 --> 00:32:20,359
Speaker 1: Put it on the radar, right like we're the first

668
00:32:20,400 --> 00:32:22,319
people at the time is me, Jake and Jared on

669
00:32:22,359 --> 00:32:27,039
the TFM podcast and we're like just like bringing national

670
00:32:27,039 --> 00:32:29,559
attention to Auto warm beer, and we're like, hey, get

671
00:32:29,559 --> 00:32:33,440
our baby boy, helme get a And then I don't know,

672
00:32:33,519 --> 00:32:35,799
it picked up steam. Trump was like all right, I'll

673
00:32:35,799 --> 00:32:38,960
do it, and then the news came out like Auto's

674
00:32:39,000 --> 00:32:43,680
coming home. But then news slowly started to Leakone wished

675
00:32:43,720 --> 00:32:46,240
for it on a monkey Paul, Oh yeah, he's brained dead.

676
00:32:47,839 --> 00:32:48,559
Speaker 2: How'd that happen?

677
00:32:50,960 --> 00:32:54,440
Speaker 1: North Korea? Stuffy Korea working in a camp.

678
00:32:54,920 --> 00:32:57,400
Speaker 2: Something, dude. I think they said he got sick, and

679
00:32:57,440 --> 00:32:58,400
I don't buy that at all.

680
00:32:59,440 --> 00:33:01,000
Speaker 1: No bashed over the head.

681
00:33:01,079 --> 00:33:03,559
Speaker 2: Yeah, So so they just like a bunch of dudes

682
00:33:03,680 --> 00:33:06,720
just like a bunch of North Korean dudes. We're just like, oh,

683
00:33:06,759 --> 00:33:08,039
hell yeah, we get to beat the shit out of

684
00:33:08,079 --> 00:33:13,880
an American. Let's go and fair enough, that's their super Bowl,

685
00:33:14,119 --> 00:33:16,680
h which is why you shouldn't go to there.

686
00:33:16,720 --> 00:33:19,319
Speaker 1: I'll go to North Korean. Let's here Denance Robin or

687
00:33:19,400 --> 00:33:22,720
the Harlem Globechotters. Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. For whatever reason though,

688
00:33:22,759 --> 00:33:25,359
he loves basketball. As long as you can you got

689
00:33:25,359 --> 00:33:27,319
a little game, you can ball a little bit, Une

690
00:33:27,319 --> 00:33:28,160
will respect you.

691
00:33:28,240 --> 00:33:30,160
Speaker 2: And you have to imagine an auto Konon not ball.

692
00:33:31,039 --> 00:33:34,000
Speaker 1: I don't think so. I think Une would like me, obviously.

693
00:33:34,000 --> 00:33:36,000
I've already hyped him up so much and you're getting

694
00:33:36,079 --> 00:33:39,359
views previous Yeah, page's from him, a previous life.

695
00:33:39,400 --> 00:33:40,359
Speaker 2: He invited you. Would you go.

696
00:33:40,799 --> 00:33:44,519
Speaker 1: I'd have to have guarantees in place.

697
00:33:45,359 --> 00:33:49,400
Speaker 2: Guarantees, Yeah, not a thing. He could tell you something

698
00:33:50,400 --> 00:33:56,039
he can be like, I promise, I promise, Dan, I

699
00:33:56,279 --> 00:34:01,599
won't murder you in the country I control completely. I promise.

700
00:34:02,319 --> 00:34:04,799
And you're like, well, okay, but Americas, you to get

701
00:34:04,839 --> 00:34:06,720
me back if you try anything.

702
00:34:07,000 --> 00:34:13,119
Speaker 1: It's like, okay, I'm going with a team of fifty

703
00:34:13,440 --> 00:34:17,719
like special forces dudes. Great, and what are they gonna do.

704
00:34:17,800 --> 00:34:19,239
They could take on the entire North Korea.

705
00:34:20,519 --> 00:34:22,559
Speaker 2: It is technically one of the biggest armies in the world,

706
00:34:22,559 --> 00:34:24,039
not one of the best, but one of the biggest.

707
00:34:24,320 --> 00:34:27,880
Speaker 1: I'm pline with that fifty special op guys.

708
00:34:28,159 --> 00:34:30,559
Speaker 2: Yeah. See now, other people when I we're talking about

709
00:34:30,599 --> 00:34:32,360
this about how oh you deserve that for going to

710
00:34:32,400 --> 00:34:37,480
that country. I do not believe that that is the

711
00:34:37,519 --> 00:34:40,199
case with Brittany Grinder. I think Britney Grinder.

712
00:34:39,960 --> 00:34:43,360
Speaker 1: Was set up for smoking weed to yeah to fuck

713
00:34:43,559 --> 00:34:47,440
to fuck with America and probably I'm still not going

714
00:34:47,480 --> 00:34:51,199
over to Russia to play ball. Yeah, I agree with that.

715
00:34:51,440 --> 00:34:53,519
I'm not the worst country to play basketball. And though

716
00:34:53,599 --> 00:34:57,920
like Marshall Henderson played basketball in Iraq, yeah with that

717
00:34:58,159 --> 00:34:58,840
weird choice.

718
00:34:59,559 --> 00:35:01,199
Speaker 2: Well he didn't and get captured.

719
00:35:01,239 --> 00:35:04,280
Speaker 1: So yeah, they could rather be an insurance salesman than

720
00:35:04,360 --> 00:35:05,000
play basketball.

721
00:35:05,000 --> 00:35:09,239
Speaker 2: Not rack. I guess it depends you just see, that's

722
00:35:09,360 --> 00:35:11,119
that's why you're not currently playing basketball.

723
00:35:11,159 --> 00:35:12,719
Speaker 1: You're right, you don't love ball though, I don't.

724
00:35:13,800 --> 00:35:15,599
Speaker 2: That's how much you have. Like those dudes who play

725
00:35:15,599 --> 00:35:19,719
in euro like Israel and shit, they love ball. There

726
00:35:19,760 --> 00:35:23,280
was a there was a Miszoo player who was like

727
00:35:23,800 --> 00:35:26,440
super mid making it about yourself. Yep. The most mid

728
00:35:26,519 --> 00:35:29,960
fucking dude, Matt Lawrence, God bless him. Good three point shooter,

729
00:35:30,039 --> 00:35:37,159
but pretty mid. He He went to Norway after college

730
00:35:37,920 --> 00:35:39,880
and won their professional league's MVP.

731
00:35:42,800 --> 00:35:45,679
Speaker 1: You can play Greece right now.

732
00:35:45,960 --> 00:35:49,079
Speaker 2: You could start on a Norwegian professional team.

733
00:35:49,119 --> 00:35:50,800
Speaker 1: Probably do it?

734
00:35:51,000 --> 00:35:54,840
Speaker 2: Okay, moved the podcast to Norway. They all speak English.

735
00:35:55,480 --> 00:35:56,320
Speaker 1: Oh they're the best.

736
00:35:56,599 --> 00:35:57,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, we'll get big there.

737
00:35:58,920 --> 00:36:01,639
Speaker 1: He then ordered the Portugue to project all English trade

738
00:36:01,639 --> 00:36:04,760
and macal. This was all intended for the British to

739
00:36:04,800 --> 00:36:08,599
pack up shop and go home. Instead, they retreat to

740
00:36:08,679 --> 00:36:15,920
a little barren island off the coast known as Hong Kong. Oh.

741
00:36:16,559 --> 00:36:19,440
Elliot still needed food for his men and those on

742
00:36:19,559 --> 00:36:22,559
Hong Kong, so we sent British ships back to mainland

743
00:36:22,639 --> 00:36:26,599
China to buy food. Chinese boats intercepted them on the

744
00:36:26,599 --> 00:36:32,320
way and confiscated all the supplies. Eliot sets a deadline

745
00:36:32,360 --> 00:36:34,199
to give back the food and let the ships through.

746
00:36:34,599 --> 00:36:38,320
That deadline passes and the British ships open fire on

747
00:36:38,360 --> 00:36:40,119
the Chinese vessels.

748
00:36:39,719 --> 00:36:41,920
Speaker 2: And I can't imagine that went well for the Chinese.

749
00:36:42,480 --> 00:36:47,639
Speaker 1: Now, the Chinese war junks returned fire, and Chinese gunners

750
00:36:47,639 --> 00:36:50,840
on land began to fire at the British ships. Nightfall

751
00:36:51,000 --> 00:36:55,440
ended the battle and the Chinese junks with drew and

752
00:36:55,639 --> 00:36:58,239
in what would be known as the Battle of Kowloon,

753
00:36:59,480 --> 00:37:03,199
Yet none of the British ships sink. It's all Chinese junks,

754
00:37:03,559 --> 00:37:04,599
which appropriate name.

755
00:37:04,880 --> 00:37:12,119
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, Chinese junkers. I mean at that point, like, technologically,

756
00:37:12,199 --> 00:37:15,760
the Chinese, I feel like gunpowder WI like firearm wise

757
00:37:15,800 --> 00:37:19,800
and ship wise are a good one hundred years behind.

758
00:37:20,239 --> 00:37:22,400
Speaker 1: The cotton powder was invented in China.

759
00:37:23,280 --> 00:37:25,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, that doesn't mean they did the best.

760
00:37:25,159 --> 00:37:27,039
Speaker 1: They imperfected. They just created.

761
00:37:27,199 --> 00:37:29,000
Speaker 2: Right. White people invented basketball.

762
00:37:29,119 --> 00:37:33,320
Speaker 1: Okay, yeah, well Canadian if you want to count even.

763
00:37:33,159 --> 00:37:37,880
Speaker 2: Better, that's an even better example. Canadians invented basketball. I mean,

764
00:37:37,920 --> 00:37:41,079
I guess a Canadian's gonna undeservedly get the MVP this year.

765
00:37:41,119 --> 00:37:45,719
Speaker 1: But otherwise, and so the First Opium War officially begins.

766
00:37:46,639 --> 00:37:49,000
Having driven off the Chinese ships, the British fleet began

767
00:37:49,039 --> 00:37:53,119
to purchase provisions from the local villagers and often with

768
00:37:53,159 --> 00:37:57,920
the aid of bribed Chinese officials. In Kowloon, Elliott ordered

769
00:37:57,960 --> 00:38:00,599
a blockade of British ships in the Pearl River, so

770
00:38:00,679 --> 00:38:04,679
British merchants would not stoke flames with more opium smuggling.

771
00:38:05,079 --> 00:38:07,320
So they're like, all right, we got this area back,

772
00:38:07,679 --> 00:38:10,239
We'll just chill in Hong Kong. We'll have kind of

773
00:38:10,280 --> 00:38:14,360
local deals with these farmers in Kowloon. We don't have

774
00:38:14,400 --> 00:38:18,840
to you know, really escalated too much and we got

775
00:38:18,840 --> 00:38:21,239
to probably stop a lot of these British ships, these

776
00:38:21,280 --> 00:38:23,800
merchant ships coming in and out with the drugs.

777
00:38:23,920 --> 00:38:27,079
Speaker 2: Okay. I actually like, as a I don't know if

778
00:38:27,079 --> 00:38:29,679
this was a strategy, but it's a devious strategy if

779
00:38:29,719 --> 00:38:32,199
it is, which is getting them addicted to drugs and

780
00:38:32,239 --> 00:38:33,159
then cutting it off.

781
00:38:33,320 --> 00:38:38,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's make them go through withdraw Oh my god.

782
00:38:38,159 --> 00:38:40,400
Speaker 2: That's a nightmare. I feel like there's probably a lot

783
00:38:40,400 --> 00:38:42,159
of British at the time that were like, man, we're

784
00:38:42,159 --> 00:38:44,440
doing gnarly shit. In fact, you know who got you

785
00:38:44,480 --> 00:38:47,320
know what colonies got treated the best?

786
00:38:48,039 --> 00:38:48,719
Speaker 1: Not ours?

787
00:38:49,159 --> 00:38:53,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, we were the ones that were like fuck you.

788
00:38:54,519 --> 00:38:57,320
Speaker 1: It'd be like that though we're spoiled us in Canada,

789
00:38:57,599 --> 00:38:59,400
we were the two that were easily treated the best.

790
00:38:59,400 --> 00:39:00,679
In the United States, it was just.

791
00:39:00,599 --> 00:39:03,239
Speaker 2: Like I can't take to s adymore. It's like an

792
00:39:03,480 --> 00:39:05,800
emo kid in a could a sac Yeah, but life

793
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Speaker 1: November third, eighteen thirty nine, a British merchantship by the

860
00:42:25,239 --> 00:42:27,800
name of the Royal Saxon tries to sail right through

861
00:42:27,840 --> 00:42:31,639
the blockade. The British naval vessels fire a warning shot

862
00:42:32,079 --> 00:42:35,039
so it would not proceed. The Chinese hear that shot

863
00:42:35,079 --> 00:42:36,840
and believe they're being fired on.

864
00:42:37,000 --> 00:42:37,360
Speaker 2: Perfect.

865
00:42:38,760 --> 00:42:41,599
Speaker 1: They send out more war Jonks to confront the blockade,

866
00:42:41,840 --> 00:42:44,719
and four of them get like just immediately sung, yeah,

867
00:42:44,760 --> 00:42:49,000
just absolutely crushed the Britge just wreck their shit. Push

868
00:42:49,039 --> 00:42:49,719
it in. I can't.

869
00:42:49,760 --> 00:42:51,280
Speaker 2: I mean, this is, by the way, when the British

870
00:42:51,320 --> 00:42:53,599
Navy is the best in the world by far. Yeah,

871
00:42:54,280 --> 00:42:56,840
And so any British ships, any ship in the image

872
00:42:56,840 --> 00:43:00,440
of a British ship manned by British people, going to

873
00:43:00,920 --> 00:43:04,880
absolutely fuck you. And if your ship happens to be

874
00:43:05,679 --> 00:43:08,000
with tech, that's too. I mean, it'd be like a

875
00:43:08,039 --> 00:43:12,599
fucking f twenty two Raptor fighting against a goddamn World

876
00:43:12,639 --> 00:43:13,360
War II fighter.

877
00:43:13,800 --> 00:43:17,599
Speaker 1: Like it's not fair, fearing that the Chinese would reject

878
00:43:17,679 --> 00:43:20,840
any contact with the British and eventually attack with fire

879
00:43:20,920 --> 00:43:23,599
rafts because that was like their only option to compete

880
00:43:23,679 --> 00:43:26,039
at night. Yeah, like, all right, let's not waste any

881
00:43:26,039 --> 00:43:28,159
more of our junks. What if we just like throw

882
00:43:28,199 --> 00:43:30,199
in these like little water land mines.

883
00:43:30,280 --> 00:43:33,360
Speaker 2: Yeah, little kamakazi guys. That's how the British, the English,

884
00:43:33,400 --> 00:43:38,280
I guess, helped themselves win the battle with the Spanish armada.

885
00:43:38,920 --> 00:43:42,039
That's it's a it's an old tactic for sure.

886
00:43:43,280 --> 00:43:46,559
Speaker 1: And then Elliott orders all ships to leave to Macau.

887
00:43:47,880 --> 00:43:51,000
He contacted the Portuguese governor Macaw to let the British

888
00:43:51,000 --> 00:43:54,360
ships load and unload their goods in exchange for paying

889
00:43:54,360 --> 00:43:58,199
rents and any duties, but the governor refuses in fear

890
00:43:58,239 --> 00:44:02,920
that the Chinese would discontinue supply supplying food and other necessities.

891
00:44:04,000 --> 00:44:08,119
British government immediately began to assemble an expeditionary force, which

892
00:44:08,159 --> 00:44:10,719
they sent to the Far East in eighteen forty and

893
00:44:10,800 --> 00:44:14,239
arrived in China in June of eighteen forty. The goal

894
00:44:14,400 --> 00:44:16,599
of this campaign was for the British forces to work

895
00:44:16,639 --> 00:44:19,239
their way up the Pearl River until they reached the

896
00:44:19,280 --> 00:44:20,079
city of Canton.

897
00:44:20,440 --> 00:44:23,920
Speaker 2: And by the way, so it's eighteen forty now, and

898
00:44:24,039 --> 00:44:26,480
I just look, I'm not an expert, so I could

899
00:44:26,480 --> 00:44:29,760
be totally wrong on this, but it strikes me that,

900
00:44:30,320 --> 00:44:33,079
like my gut tells me, and listen to your gut always,

901
00:44:33,519 --> 00:44:39,239
my gut tells me that Chinese military technology has not

902
00:44:39,360 --> 00:44:43,679
progressed a ton since the seventeen nineties, and English military

903
00:44:43,719 --> 00:44:48,760
technology has been cutting edge the entire time. So the

904
00:44:49,599 --> 00:44:55,519
gap in military ability just keeps widening in favor of

905
00:44:55,519 --> 00:44:56,360
the British.

906
00:44:57,039 --> 00:45:00,360
Speaker 1: Along the way, they captured or destroyed several Chinese forts

907
00:45:00,360 --> 00:45:04,000
and strongholds. The military assault allowed the British forces to

908
00:45:04,039 --> 00:45:08,199
capture large sections of China, including Canton. While the Ching

909
00:45:08,480 --> 00:45:12,119
forces attempted to recapture significant locations, there were no match

910
00:45:12,159 --> 00:45:14,280
for the superior British weapons and tactics.

911
00:45:14,800 --> 00:45:18,320
Speaker 2: Okay, Nan King is famous for another thing.

912
00:45:18,599 --> 00:45:23,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, but before babies were getting chopped in half, and

913
00:45:24,199 --> 00:45:24,639
what was.

914
00:45:24,599 --> 00:45:26,760
Speaker 2: The rape of Nan King? Was the before they.

915
00:45:26,800 --> 00:45:33,199
Speaker 1: Raped hundreds of thousands of women probably literally, Yeah, the

916
00:45:33,239 --> 00:45:37,960
British were threatening their way alive and they're like, uh,

917
00:45:38,000 --> 00:45:42,000
we're good, don't fucum Nan King. As a result, The

918
00:45:42,039 --> 00:45:45,199
war ended August eighteen forty two with the sign of

919
00:45:45,239 --> 00:45:48,440
the Treaty of Nanking. Britain had won the war and

920
00:45:48,480 --> 00:45:52,679
secured itself a trade position in mainland China. One of

921
00:45:52,679 --> 00:45:54,519
the main outcomes of the Treaty of Nan King was

922
00:45:54,519 --> 00:45:58,440
the establishment of more opening trading systems for foreign merchants.

923
00:45:59,119 --> 00:46:01,400
China was forced to have at least five trade imports

924
00:46:01,440 --> 00:46:05,119
outside of Canton. There was also special considerations made for

925
00:46:05,159 --> 00:46:11,639
British merchants at this trading post and controls placed on terrafs. Next,

926
00:46:11,679 --> 00:46:14,280
the Treaty of Nan King forced the Chin government to

927
00:46:14,679 --> 00:46:19,599
backpay the British for their losses in the opium crackdown. Yeah, well,

928
00:46:20,639 --> 00:46:24,719
you totally fucked over our population with the opium. Here's

929
00:46:24,760 --> 00:46:25,360
the money for that.

930
00:46:25,519 --> 00:46:28,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, here's the money for the drugs you made them do.

931
00:46:30,320 --> 00:46:33,199
Speaker 1: Also, they were not held accountable to local Chinese law,

932
00:46:33,800 --> 00:46:37,760
so these British ports finally British law.

933
00:46:37,880 --> 00:46:39,880
Speaker 2: A sailor can just beat the shit out of a

934
00:46:39,920 --> 00:46:42,559
peasant without having to worry.

935
00:46:42,360 --> 00:46:44,400
Speaker 1: Not to answer for his crown thing with the Bruce

936
00:46:44,400 --> 00:46:49,119
Springsteen song, shouldn't have to pay for beating the Johnny's

937
00:46:49,119 --> 00:46:53,400
man up in China? Yeah, it is. Yeah. I remember

938
00:46:53,559 --> 00:46:56,719
listening to that song mowing the lawn at my house. Yeah,

939
00:46:56,760 --> 00:46:58,760
because my parents would just always play Bruce and Red

940
00:46:58,760 --> 00:47:02,039
Bandana on whenever I doing chores, So this sounds right

941
00:47:02,199 --> 00:47:04,960
blue collar. I usually checked out on the lyrics, but.

942
00:47:05,440 --> 00:47:08,280
Speaker 2: That was one of the songs. Yeah, beaten up by

943
00:47:08,400 --> 00:47:13,000
John and man report it's English law and he's not

944
00:47:13,039 --> 00:47:15,320
a human under English law.

945
00:47:16,880 --> 00:47:19,079
Speaker 1: Bruce spoke to the working man like no one else.

946
00:47:20,519 --> 00:47:24,920
People don't know this. People refuse to admit this, but

947
00:47:24,960 --> 00:47:31,360
Bruce was always loyal to the Crown, always always. Finally,

948
00:47:31,360 --> 00:47:34,599
Britain controlled the island of Hong Kong as part of

949
00:47:34,639 --> 00:47:39,480
the Nan King Treaty. More formally, Hong Kong was ceded

950
00:47:39,639 --> 00:47:42,719
to Queen Victoria and remained under control of the British

951
00:47:42,800 --> 00:47:46,239
until nineteen ninety seven, when it was then returned to

952
00:47:46,280 --> 00:47:47,440
the People's Republic of China.

953
00:47:47,519 --> 00:47:53,119
Speaker 2: And everyone in Hong Kong was like, no, because uh,

954
00:47:53,239 --> 00:47:55,679
initially they just took Hong Kong in these first Opium Wars.

955
00:47:55,719 --> 00:47:58,480
Speaker 1: After the Second Opium Wars, they make this whole deal

956
00:47:58,599 --> 00:48:00,400
where it's like I will only sit on China for

957
00:48:00,519 --> 00:48:02,159
like or we'll see them Hong Kong.

958
00:48:02,039 --> 00:48:06,119
Speaker 2: For year least. Yeah, year, lease something like that. But

959
00:48:06,159 --> 00:48:08,440
I really can't be stressed enough. How in nineteen ninety seven,

960
00:48:08,519 --> 00:48:11,480
all of Hong Kong was like, God.

961
00:48:10,960 --> 00:48:14,239
Speaker 1: Damn it, We're good with our current situation.

962
00:48:14,320 --> 00:48:17,519
Speaker 2: We like it much better than what's about to happen.

963
00:48:17,880 --> 00:48:18,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, which is.

964
00:48:18,440 --> 00:48:22,119
Speaker 2: Why Hong Kong is still like a hotbed of like

965
00:48:23,079 --> 00:48:26,679
protesting and shit like that, because some of those people

966
00:48:26,679 --> 00:48:31,280
had tasted freedom and they don't much care for what

967
00:48:31,320 --> 00:48:32,599
they're currently dealing.

968
00:48:32,320 --> 00:48:38,079
Speaker 1: With now, but still like the fucking capital of all

969
00:48:38,119 --> 00:48:40,079
their money making operations for the most part.

970
00:48:41,039 --> 00:48:44,239
Speaker 2: China Yeah, yeah, got turned into like their New York

971
00:48:44,360 --> 00:48:47,480
kind of. I feel like like it's there, it's their

972
00:48:47,559 --> 00:48:48,840
like economic center.

973
00:48:48,960 --> 00:48:52,360
Speaker 1: Yeah, so it's I think a few spots in China

974
00:48:52,400 --> 00:48:57,400
aren't like totally communist. They're trying, they're trying, but they're

975
00:48:57,440 --> 00:49:01,280
also they like a little bit of cap they gotta yeah,

976
00:49:01,320 --> 00:49:03,199
when it pays the bills. When they got to pay

977
00:49:03,199 --> 00:49:07,079
the bills, that's prob Uh what did you learn today?

978
00:49:09,000 --> 00:49:10,840
Speaker 2: I mean, I didn't really know much about the opium wares,

979
00:49:10,920 --> 00:49:13,639
so pretty much everything. Uh, it is funny that that

980
00:49:13,880 --> 00:49:18,440
was I guess I didn't realize how direct of a planet.

981
00:49:18,599 --> 00:49:22,320
Speaker 1: Was that they're just gonna use kind of third parties

982
00:49:22,400 --> 00:49:24,079
to infest China.

983
00:49:24,480 --> 00:49:31,039
Speaker 2: Yeah, this drug. Yeah, I didn't realize how planned it was. Yeah,

984
00:49:31,360 --> 00:49:33,360
I actually I really more thought it was just like, oh,

985
00:49:33,400 --> 00:49:36,719
they brought opium into China and boyd to China like opium.

986
00:49:36,719 --> 00:49:39,400
Speaker 1: There was a bunch of circumstances, like India was costing

987
00:49:39,840 --> 00:49:44,519
the East India Trading Company millions of pounds, like I

988
00:49:44,519 --> 00:49:46,400
think there were like twenty eight million in the hole

989
00:49:46,920 --> 00:49:51,719
on India. On India, why just constant battles and fights

990
00:49:51,719 --> 00:49:54,000
and yeah, that makes sense, and it's just a fucking

991
00:49:54,079 --> 00:49:54,519
night there.

992
00:49:54,920 --> 00:49:56,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, hard place to govern.

993
00:49:57,320 --> 00:50:00,239
Speaker 1: So they get Calcutta all set up, but like, yeah,

994
00:50:00,239 --> 00:50:04,679
they're massively in debt from that. They're like, oh, opium

995
00:50:04,760 --> 00:50:07,119
grows pretty well here because they initially sent up India

996
00:50:07,159 --> 00:50:11,639
as kind of a place to maybe grow cotton, yeah,

997
00:50:11,760 --> 00:50:14,840
to make up for the loss of you know, the US.

998
00:50:14,960 --> 00:50:17,320
Speaker 2: I believe they eventually figured that out in Egypt.

999
00:50:17,599 --> 00:50:21,119
Speaker 1: Yeah, but India cotton does not grow well.

1000
00:50:21,400 --> 00:50:23,480
Speaker 2: No. I that was one of the things that fucked

1001
00:50:23,480 --> 00:50:26,719
the South in the Civil War, is that England figured

1002
00:50:26,760 --> 00:50:28,400
out like oh, oh it's cool, it's cool.

1003
00:50:28,199 --> 00:50:29,239
Speaker 1: We can grow Kyptian cotton.

1004
00:50:29,519 --> 00:50:32,519
Speaker 2: Yeah. Oh thank god, Oh, thank god, we don't have

1005
00:50:32,599 --> 00:50:33,599
to get into the fucking war.

1006
00:50:33,760 --> 00:50:36,280
Speaker 1: Oh no, one's buying India cotton bed sheets.

1007
00:50:36,519 --> 00:50:42,360
Speaker 2: No, No, they're definitely not. Yeah, I didn't know how

1008
00:50:42,719 --> 00:50:45,840
intentional it was. Not that it doesn't surprise me, but

1009
00:50:46,280 --> 00:50:49,199
I didn't realize how planned it was.

1010
00:50:49,400 --> 00:50:51,880
Speaker 1: So does it really surprise you? If you know, maybe

1011
00:50:51,960 --> 00:50:54,880
China is responsible for the fentanyl crisis in the US.

1012
00:50:55,719 --> 00:50:59,199
Speaker 2: Oh, that's a conspiracy that I actually like buy like

1013
00:50:59,280 --> 00:51:03,079
a lot of you know whatever, more people built the pyramids,

1014
00:51:03,119 --> 00:51:04,400
whatever the fucking people believe.

1015
00:51:04,719 --> 00:51:06,320
Speaker 1: But it's part of the trade war.

1016
00:51:06,400 --> 00:51:10,800
Speaker 2: Blah blah blah. This Hitler didn't die in World War two. Well,

1017
00:51:11,960 --> 00:51:18,480
but China being like just because they do, they hold

1018
00:51:18,519 --> 00:51:23,679
a deeper national like they hold on to national trauma

1019
00:51:23,719 --> 00:51:27,679
longer than we do. Certainly we barely care about the

1020
00:51:27,760 --> 00:51:29,119
people ten years older than us.

1021
00:51:29,199 --> 00:51:31,760
Speaker 1: China has a bit of a longer point of view.

1022
00:51:32,039 --> 00:51:34,519
Speaker 2: Yeah, so I think they definitely part of them, is

1023
00:51:34,559 --> 00:51:35,079
like yeah.

1024
00:51:34,920 --> 00:51:38,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, which is why they don't allow Chinese TikTok

1025
00:51:39,800 --> 00:51:40,679
in their own country.

1026
00:51:40,760 --> 00:51:43,480
Speaker 2: China poison or the West poisoned US. So now We're

1027
00:51:43,480 --> 00:51:45,039
going to poison the King of the West. It's not

1028
00:51:45,079 --> 00:51:47,519
even the UK anymore, so it's us.

1029
00:51:47,760 --> 00:51:51,039
Speaker 1: I buy that I'm still doing it probably, I'm sure

1030
00:51:51,039 --> 00:51:54,599
they are, but I buy fully that that there's like

1031
00:51:54,719 --> 00:51:57,760
some intent behind that, and it's directly related to the

1032
00:51:57,800 --> 00:51:58,719
opium Wars.

1033
00:51:58,760 --> 00:52:02,320
Speaker 2: Like I, out of doubt, just believe.

1034
00:52:01,960 --> 00:52:04,559
Speaker 1: That who was today's hitler?

1035
00:52:05,360 --> 00:52:07,880
Speaker 2: Honestly, dude, it's a Chinese emperor. Just do business, bro,

1036
00:52:08,800 --> 00:52:10,760
Just do fuck I mean, because the reason this all

1037
00:52:10,800 --> 00:52:14,360
happened at the end of the day is because a

1038
00:52:14,400 --> 00:52:19,800
few powerful people didn't want to let money flow in

1039
00:52:20,239 --> 00:52:21,760
to the rest of their country.

1040
00:52:22,320 --> 00:52:26,360
Speaker 1: They didn't trust Whitey. I don't maybe it was more

1041
00:52:26,400 --> 00:52:29,360
of a like supremacy thing like we said earlier, they oh, yeah,

1042
00:52:29,559 --> 00:52:35,000
this was few like a double racism fight. But part

1043
00:52:35,000 --> 00:52:39,079
of it to me seems like the Chinese ruling class

1044
00:52:39,199 --> 00:52:45,079
was very happy with their situation and didn't want their

1045
00:52:45,199 --> 00:52:49,960
population that they ruled completely to have outside influence or

1046
00:52:50,039 --> 00:52:52,199
extra cash flow or anything like that.

1047
00:52:52,559 --> 00:52:54,159
Speaker 2: And this is what happened. By the way, the only

1048
00:52:54,239 --> 00:52:56,840
the only people that really suffered were the people that

1049
00:52:56,840 --> 00:52:59,079
they that were all that they were trying to fuck over.

1050
00:52:59,559 --> 00:53:04,800
Speaker 1: Maybe they just fucked with the Portuguese better than the English.

1051
00:53:04,920 --> 00:53:06,960
Speaker 2: Portugal is not a serious country, so I assumed they

1052
00:53:07,000 --> 00:53:08,760
were much easier to deal with.

1053
00:53:08,840 --> 00:53:10,400
Speaker 1: They were a serious country at that point.

1054
00:53:10,599 --> 00:53:13,559
Speaker 2: Eh. They had a couple of coffee, as you like

1055
00:53:13,599 --> 00:53:16,159
to say, they got Brazil, they had a cup of coffee.

1056
00:53:17,400 --> 00:53:19,679
Speaker 1: They ruled the seas for two hundred years.

1057
00:53:19,760 --> 00:53:22,119
Speaker 2: I don't know, two hundred seems generous.

1058
00:53:23,159 --> 00:53:26,440
Speaker 1: He can't can't sleep on the Portuguese navy.

1059
00:53:27,239 --> 00:53:30,239
Speaker 2: I am I'm fucking sound asleep.

1060
00:53:29,880 --> 00:53:34,480
Speaker 1: On this circumnavigated the world. I guess Magellan is Portuguese.

1061
00:53:34,559 --> 00:53:38,199
Speaker 2: Yeah, well he didn't do it. He only got halfway.

1062
00:53:38,519 --> 00:53:41,559
Speaker 1: Just because he got got in the Philippines, wasn't on water.

1063
00:53:43,199 --> 00:53:44,960
Speaker 2: I'm just saying his crew did.

1064
00:53:45,760 --> 00:53:50,400
Speaker 1: I think only eighteen people survived that trip. Might have

1065
00:53:50,400 --> 00:53:51,519
to do a Magellan episode.

1066
00:53:51,599 --> 00:53:55,880
Speaker 2: It's a funny story about just how brutal that trip was.

1067
00:53:56,599 --> 00:53:58,960
Speaker 1: I also feel like, so he's from Portugal, but he

1068
00:53:59,000 --> 00:54:01,159
doesn't sail under portug He's banners. I think he did

1069
00:54:01,239 --> 00:54:04,920
under Spanish Spanish flags. I think so the Portuguese when

1070
00:54:04,960 --> 00:54:06,719
I was there, they have kind of like a love

1071
00:54:06,719 --> 00:54:08,159
hate relationship with Magellan.

1072
00:54:08,360 --> 00:54:11,679
Speaker 2: Well, I mean the Italians claimed Columbus because he's Italian,

1073
00:54:12,599 --> 00:54:16,559
but well he's Jewish, Yeah he is Jewish, but did

1074
00:54:16,559 --> 00:54:21,480
it under a Spanish flag? So but yeah, that's my hitler.

1075
00:54:21,519 --> 00:54:23,719
It's the Chinese ruling class.

1076
00:54:23,639 --> 00:54:29,199
Speaker 1: Okay, not the drug dealers, the glares of opium yea

1077
00:54:29,599 --> 00:54:33,199
to a population, getting them addicted and then make him

1078
00:54:33,239 --> 00:54:34,280
go through major withdraws.

1079
00:54:34,360 --> 00:54:36,559
Speaker 2: They set the whole thing off. They set the whole

1080
00:54:36,599 --> 00:54:37,119
thing off.

1081
00:54:38,480 --> 00:54:41,239
Speaker 1: Maybe some of those clocks and carriages sucked.

1082
00:54:41,360 --> 00:54:45,159
Speaker 2: It's fine to not trust them, but their motivations, I

1083
00:54:45,239 --> 00:54:48,440
guarantee you were to just maintain their power, their power,

1084
00:54:48,599 --> 00:54:52,599
not China's power, their power over China. Different thing.

1085
00:54:54,360 --> 00:54:56,519
Speaker 1: I mean when we came over, are you gonna blame

1086
00:54:57,360 --> 00:55:02,360
the natives descent on not willing to trade with you know,

1087
00:55:02,440 --> 00:55:03,639
the Europeans.

1088
00:55:03,079 --> 00:55:10,159
Speaker 2: Totally different, totally different. They were like neolithic people like

1089
00:55:10,360 --> 00:55:13,079
China was a whole last country. Yeah yeah, I mean

1090
00:55:13,079 --> 00:55:14,639
you could have China could have done it right. They

1091
00:55:14,639 --> 00:55:15,280
didn't do it right.

1092
00:55:15,440 --> 00:55:21,800
Speaker 1: Okay, Well, Rob, it's always a pleasure, always a pleasure.

1093
00:55:23,320 --> 00:55:26,000
Check out the Patreon Patreon dot com slash softcore History.

1094
00:55:26,000 --> 00:55:28,760
We get tw additional episodes every week Wednesday and Friday.

1095
00:55:29,360 --> 00:55:32,079
Last week, we did an episode on where the Garden

1096
00:55:32,880 --> 00:55:34,719
Eden have been?

1097
00:55:35,159 --> 00:55:37,480
Speaker 2: Where it is some hot new theories on where the

1098
00:55:37,480 --> 00:55:38,320
Garden of Eden was.

1099
00:55:38,440 --> 00:55:42,199
Speaker 1: We also again covered this Chinese baddie from seven hundreds

1100
00:55:42,239 --> 00:55:46,360
and her wiping out essentially her entire bloodline. Yeah, to

1101
00:55:46,679 --> 00:55:51,800
get power kinda set up her her dynasty for about

1102
00:55:51,840 --> 00:55:55,199
two hundred years. Did a pretty good job otherwise, but

1103
00:55:55,320 --> 00:55:56,960
she was pretty ruthless.

1104
00:55:57,079 --> 00:56:01,159
Speaker 2: Yeah, she was good in between the murders of her children.

1105
00:56:01,280 --> 00:56:03,119
Speaker 1: And then we got episodes coming up this week. I

1106
00:56:03,159 --> 00:56:05,519
have no idea the top is gonna be. We don't

1107
00:56:05,519 --> 00:56:07,400
know yet because Rob hasn't written.

1108
00:56:07,519 --> 00:56:10,519
Speaker 2: I don't know yet. I'll right it tomorrow. Yeah, I

1109
00:56:10,519 --> 00:56:12,519
mean I have a whole list of stuff, but I

1110
00:56:12,599 --> 00:56:13,239
just got to pick one.

1111
00:56:13,320 --> 00:56:17,199
Speaker 1: Yeah, and perhaps a new sketch coming out son Yeah, yeah, yeah.

1112
00:56:17,000 --> 00:56:18,440
Speaker 2: I'm doing a final pass on it and then we'll

1113
00:56:18,440 --> 00:56:19,199
be ready to record.

1114
00:56:19,440 --> 00:56:25,679
Speaker 1: Okay, but was thet on that two weeks okay for release?

1115
00:56:25,760 --> 00:56:30,239
Two weeks release, three weeks release, really hitting your quota.

1116
00:56:30,400 --> 00:56:32,400
Speaker 2: I'm gonna get twelve year. I'm gonna get twelve hour.

1117
00:56:32,360 --> 00:56:34,880
Speaker 1: Year, twelve original sketches this year.

1118
00:56:35,039 --> 00:56:36,559
Speaker 2: Yeah, it just part of it.

1119
00:56:36,599 --> 00:56:40,079
Speaker 1: Depends on talent availability, because I want to get Jack

1120
00:56:40,079 --> 00:56:42,280
in it. Oh okay, I thought that was a subtle

1121
00:56:42,280 --> 00:56:42,719
shot at me.

1122
00:56:42,920 --> 00:56:45,920
Speaker 2: No, no, no, I know you're available. Uh you're in

1123
00:56:45,960 --> 00:56:49,599
it too. But I need Jack for it and Boosh

1124
00:56:49,920 --> 00:56:52,480
for it as well, I think, and my own wife

1125
00:56:52,480 --> 00:56:53,119
for it as well.

1126
00:56:53,400 --> 00:56:57,719
Speaker 1: Okay, we always need your wife's mouth, yeah, whenever possible.

1127
00:56:57,440 --> 00:57:00,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly, and Gabby actually as well. It's lot of

1128
00:57:00,360 --> 00:57:02,119
it's a big it's a big undertaking this one.

1129
00:57:02,159 --> 00:57:04,840
Speaker 1: It's a whole ensemble. Yeah. Yeah, this one's a biggin

1130
00:57:06,079 --> 00:57:08,159
sign up now. Yeah, it'll be a soon.

1131
00:57:08,400 --> 00:57:09,800
Speaker 2: I'm very excited for it.

1132
00:57:09,840 --> 00:57:12,880
Speaker 1: But it's a big yeah, plus three years of evergreen

1133
00:57:12,920 --> 00:57:17,400
content at this point, you will not be disappointed. There's

1134
00:57:17,440 --> 00:57:19,880
no better deal, I don't think in the podcast in realm,

1135
00:57:20,039 --> 00:57:20,559
I agree.

1136
00:57:20,760 --> 00:57:22,480
Speaker 2: Yeah. The next guesch after that's gonna be a ten

1137
00:57:22,480 --> 00:57:24,920
minute radio play that I write in like four days

1138
00:57:25,559 --> 00:57:26,440
and record in one.

1139
00:57:27,079 --> 00:57:28,800
Speaker 1: But this one, this is like an hour. It's a

1140
00:57:28,800 --> 00:57:32,840
whole last thing. Yeah yeah, yeah, all right, Well, Rol Fox,

1141
00:57:33,079 --> 00:57:35,440
I'm damn Chester. You just got saw served